The View from the Storm's Eye
by J. Lucy-Daisuke
Summary: Chapter forty two up finally! Look for third installment soon! The sequel to Shadows of the Legends! A year and a half after the disbanding of the new Lupin gang, suddenly the team members are called back to help Lupin. But nothing stays the same forever.
1. Sister Christian

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Lupin III… But I do own my Lupin IV universe… Yay for fanfics!

Hello again, dear friends, and welcome,

To the forth and probably last installment of this long-running fanfic. I hope everyone had a happy New Year, just as I hope everyone enjoys this latest chapter in the lives of the new Lupin gang. It's almost strange—When this story started in June 2003, Yukiko was only seven. Now she's about twenty-nine… Sorry I'm being sentimental… Well, I hope you all enjoy! Bye, and see you all around! One, and by the way, please review!

Chapter One

A Year and a Half Later: Sister Christian

Fun Fact of Boredom: The Lupin III soundtrack, over the years, has been very jazz-heavy. Hence, this is why Odori's name comes from an album of the same name by the jazz band Hiroshima. It's my form of homage.

_'It's been a long time,_

_But now I'm coming back home,_

_I've been away, now,_

_Oh how I've been alone'_

—The Beatles, _'Wait'_

Moscow, Russia:

"Why don't you ask them to leave, then?" the innkeeper's wife asked her husband as both viewed the seedy duo who sat the darkened bar of the inn. The duo was apparently Asian, and the tall man, dressed in a navy blue gi, carried two swords with him. The shorter woman, who dressed in a white suit and fedora, carried at least one gun on her, from what they could see. Both were quiet, and caused virtually no disturbance, but the innkeeper and his wife knew who they were. They were the infamous thieves, Toshiro Ishikawa and Yukiko Jigen, and they were on their second bottle of hard liquor. This seemingly had no effect upon the seasoned alcoholics, but both were a danger, the Russians knew.

"I'd rather call the police… These two are a couple of bastards, from what I hear. They're both menaces…." replied the innkeeper, "I'll be back."

"I think he spotted us," Toshiro whispered as he sipped his vodka. "I think he's gone to call the police…"

"Good; about time we saw some action!" Yukiko said with a smile, quickly finished her alcohol and slamming the glass upon the table. She spun around in her seat, and smiled at the dead crowd in the bar.

"Let's get out of here before things get out of control. I don't know about you, but I know how violent those cops can be here!" Toshiro instructed her, taking her by the hand and running up the stairs into their room. It was a small, shabby room, and very chilly. He quickly went to packing while Yukiko sighed and begrudgingly began to pack her belongings as well.

"Why the hell are you being so cautious?" Yukiko asked irritably. "You usually aren't this irritable."

"I got a note today, from a farmer who I guess knew me… That, or he knew what I looked like from police reports…. Maybe he was a Lupin lackey, hell I don't know… But there's one thing I'm sure of…" replied Toshiro as he slipped his backpack over his shoulders and looked back at her. "It's from Ryo."

"Ryo? How'd she know where we are?" asked Yukiko as she too slipped her backpack over her shoulders. Toshiro opened the window to their inn room and looked downward at his yellow Vespa. He quickly had his attentions diverted to the ever approaching police vehicles, however.

"Come on, we'll figure that out later!" Toshiro jumped out of the room, and landed upon the ground, which was a two story downward jump. Yukiko soon followed, and promptly fell as she made contact with the ground. As she lifted herself off of the ground, the police officers stopped, and drew their weapons.

"Hands up!" yelled one officer in broken English. Both slowly did this action, and Yukiko leaned inward to Toshiro.

"You wanna handle this?" asked Yukiko, looking over at Toshiro, who had also raised his hands.

"You're letting me handle the bloodshed? It must be my birthday!" Toshiro gasped in mock surprise.

"Just get on already," Yukiko grumbled. Toshiro complied, and hopped onto his bike quickly. Yukiko soon followed, and fired at the officers who shot at them. Toshiro removed one of his swords, and cut through the line of officers, his Vespa climbing on of the cruisers and falling down again as it finished its ride over the roof of the car. The duo sped off, their destination a small airport.

"She told us to meet up with her in Japan after we find everyone else… Ally's going to meet us in Korea…." said Toshiro as he dismounted his bike, "I found a guy who'll fly us to Hawaii, so we can pick up Heiji. Little guy's still on that damn island…"

"Jeeze, I'm glad you told me this ahead of time…" Yukiko grumbled, "What's new, though?" she shot Toshiro a glare, which he readily returned, "What, don't give me that look! Geeze, you're acting like where're married!" Yukiko sighed.

"Does almost count?" Toshiro retorted.

"Smart ass…." said Yukiko tiredly as both walked into the small airport, Toshiro with his swords and bike and her with her gun and no one caring.

Honolulu, Hawaii:

"Ouch! That seagull just bit me!" Yukiko yelped, jumping in pain. "I thought you were the bird man! Why didn't he go biting _you_!?"

"Maybe he thought you were his mommy. You _are _dressed in all white, like he is," Toshiro chuckled. It was the morning and although it had been a long flight the jet lag had yet to take its affect upon them. The strange pair walked along the beach after hearing word that this was where Heiji spent his Saturday mornings. It was surprising to both, for the Heiji they knew hated sunlight. But then again, they had not seen him since their parting almost a year and a half ago.

"Hey, that guy's Japanese. Maybe he talks to Heiji," said Yukiko, nudging Toshiro in the direction of the one beached surfer. Toshiro nodded, and approached the young man, who looked strikingly familiar.

"Excuse me, have you seen my brother? His name's Heiji—He looks a lot like me, except with black hair instead of red and, well, he's a little shorter, and sort of husky if you catch my drift," said Toshiro. "Oh, and he also wears glasses."

"Why'd you keep it red? I thought you hated that," asked the young man in a familiar voice. Toshiro gasped in shock. It was Heiji, but, it wasn't Heiji. This young man was about forty pounds lighter, and wore no glasses. He was reasonably shorter though, and spoke like Heiji.

"Heiji?" Toshiro choked in disbelief.

"The one and only," said Heiji with a smirk.

"You're—Well, you're not--"

"Yeah. I just started swimming out here one day and, well, you see the results," Heiji laughed. "I've been waiting for you guys to show up—That Yukiko back there? Well, she looks exactly the same. I expected to see her pregnant or carrying a kid or something!"

"Eh, no… If that were so, it'd be immaculate," replied Toshiro uneasily.

"Huh? How long has it been since you two—"

"Four months."

"Jesus!"

"Yeah."

"Any clue why?" Heiji inquired.

"Um… We had a scare, and we thought she had gotten pregnant. Ever since then she's been making excuses in order not to sleep with me," replied Toshiro tiredly. "It's better not to talk about it around her. It only brings up arguments…"

"Okay," Heiji nodded in understanding. "You guys want a drink? I've got some stuff at my place… Well, it's technically not mine… I share it with a client of mine, but he's out for a few months."

"That's very generous of you, Heiji," Toshiro said, and motioned for Yukiko to follow. She quickly caught up to the two, and Heiji led them to a nearby beach house. Both Yukiko and Toshiro agreed that the view was gorgeous as they waited on the front porch while Heiji opened the door. He led them in, and excused himself while he went to go take a shower and change.

"It's beautiful out there," Toshiro said as he looked out of a window at the beach scenery.

"Sure as hell nicer than Northern Europe… Place does nothing but rain!" Yukiko added, opening the window. She removed a cigarette from her jacket, and stuck her head out of the window while she smoked it. She kept her hand outside of the establishment while she held the cigarette in her hand, and allowed Toshiro to lean in and kiss her.

"Where're probably going to stay overnight here," Toshiro started.

"Hey, great! Luau!" said Yukiko cheerily.

Toshiro sighed tiredly, "Yeah… Sure… Luau…. I'm going to see what he keeps in the fridge…"

"That one was close…" Yukiko said to herself as she took yet another drag of her cigarette out of the window.

A Cagliostro church:

"Where's the groom?" the priest asked the mother of the bride. Carmen di Cagliostro stood at the altar, dressed in a white bridal gown and carrying a bouquet of flowers, while next to her was an emptied space where her future husband should have stood. But Allen Jigen had gone AWOL yet again.

"Oh, dear… Not a sixth time, Ally," Clarisse said sadly to herself with a shake of the head.

"I'm sure he'll show if we just give him another five minutes! He promised he wouldn't do this again, Mother!" said Carmen passionately. There was a long pause, and Carmen threw down her bouquet, "I'll go find him… I know where he his…"

She ran down the steps of the altar, and out of the church, and out of the castle grounds. She found Ally in his usual spot by a lake, sitting upon a bench, thinking deeply to himself. He was dressed in a full tuxedo, and his hair had been slicked back tightly, giving him an appearance much like his father.

Carmen seated herself next to Ally and looked at him understandingly, "You just couldn't do it, could you?"

"I'm sorry," Ally said quietly. "I just… I don't know what my problem is! I just think of everything, and I chicken out! It's not because I don't love you, I do! It's just that I freak out when I see those people…. And I get nervous… Me! Who fought killers, who nearly got himself cared and didn't give a damn! I'm… I'm scared!"

"It's all right, I understand," said Carmen with a reassuring smile, taking his hand in hers. "Allen, don't worry. Eventually we'll get married…"

"Yeah, when I'm forty," Ally snorted. "I'll be just like my dad…"

"It is something scary, but you're not alone, remember," said Carmen happily. Her smile fell as she watched his expression, however, "There's something else on your mind, isn't there?"

"I got a letter today… From my sister…" Ally started, and removed the said letter from a jacket pocket, "She says Fuji needs help, and, well, she's still my friend, and Ryo is my sister, but I—"

"Then go," Carmen cut him off quickly, "I'll wait here for you until then. Maybe… Maybe this will give you the opportunity to think some things over. They need you there."

"But I'm needed here, too!" said Ally.

"I'll be all right," Carmen reassured him. "Just go to your sister. It's probably urgent if she called you away."

"Yeah, must be… She's having the entire gang assemble!" said Ally. He rose from the bench, and leaned downward to kiss Carmen. "I'll come home safely, I promise."

"I know," she replied quietly. "Have a good time, as well."

"It'd be better with you, but you aren't meant for those things," Ally answered.

Seoul, Korea, a Few Days Later, in an Airport:

"Heiji, what the hell happened to you!? You look terrific!" said Ally in shock as he laid eyes upon Heiji, "I thought you were your brother, for a few seconds! Good thing I realized my mistake, though, or I would've been punching the wrong guy!"

"Punching?" Toshiro frowned, and groaned after Ally delivered a hard swing to his left shoulder. "Nice to see you too, Ally…"

"So, where's Odori?" asked Ally, "I would've figured she would've jumped at the chance to shed blood…"

"She refused to come, so we're here to fetch her ass," replied Heiji as he helped Ally lift his luggage, "I hope you brought the Romeo with you… Sitting with these two in a taxi is less than fun…"

"What the hell does that mean!?" Yukiko and Toshiro snapped in unison.

"I'm going to pick it up now," replied Ally, holding the keys to the red vehicle upward. The three met Ally out front, and all climbed into the Alpha Romeo (Toshiro had left his Vespa at the hotel) and drove to the dojo where they heard Odori was staying and teaching young pupils.

"Just like old times!" said Yukiko happily, "You guys have no idea how much I missed this!"

"Good to know someone's happy to have their ass drug away from their life…" Ally grumbled as he floored the gas of the automobile.

They arrived at the cleanly dojo twenty minutes after departing from the front of the airport. Heiji, who was the most fluent in Korean, walked up to the door, and explained the situation. He seemed stunned at what the doorman said, and waved his three friends into the building.

"What's wrong, Heiji?" asked Toshiro quietly as the doorman left to go fetch Odori.

"You aren't going to believe this, Toshiro," said Heiji with a shake of the head.

"Going to believe—Holy crap…" he muttered as Odori walked out of one of the training centers, still carrying a bokken.

"I figured you all would be showing up… I would have come with you, but I have a few clans angry with me," said Odori, "I'll grab Zantetsuken, my bags, and we'll be off."

"Are you sure you're okay to travel in your condition?" Yukiko choked in disbelief.

"Yes. I'm strong," replied Odori with a nod.

"Not you… The baby…" Heiji interjected, pointing to Odori's enlarged stomach.

Odori looked downward at her stomach, back upward at Heiji, and then down at her stomach, "The baby is strong as well."

"How… How far along are you?" Ally asked.

"Five months," Odori answered.

"Boy or girl?" asked Toshiro.

"They can't tell yet, although I pray nightly for a son," responded Odori. "I have no desire to name him Goemon, however, Toshiro. I'll leave that up to you."

"Hey, what about me!?" snapped Heiji.

"Hm… I would make a jab at you, Heiji, but I choose not to. You look good, by the way," replied Odori.

"Who's the father?" asked Toshiro.

Odori paused, "I'll get my bags. When are we leaving?"

"Here, we'll help!" said Heiji, taking Toshiro by the gi sleeve and leading his brother into one of the back rooms with Odori.

"Why do I think they're going to be two mother hens to Odori, and it's going to annoy the hell out of her?" Yukiko asked Ally.

"I can carry something! I'm not helpless!" snapped Odori out of the sight of the Jigen siblings.

"What, you're already carrying our nephew!" Toshiro retorted.

"I'm carrying my damn sword, at least! I worked hard enough to earn it!" snapped Odori, "Heiji, put my sword down!"

"Odori, quit acting like a brat and get in the car," sighed Heiji tiredly.

"This is gonna be a longgggg flight to Japan…" Ally said to his sister tiredly.

A Driving Range in Tokyo, Japan:

"Very good, now ease in…. Ease in…" said the placid driving instructor quietly to her student, "Very good… Now let's work on backing out…" she said, looking away and rolling her eyes. Ryo Jigen had never been so bored in her life. Something caught her eye on the driving range, however. It was a red car, and a yellow motorcycle. It was her Lupin gang members! Ryo immediately burst from the vehicle and ran out to them.

"What do I do about the car!?" screamed the student.

"Keep it! It's a gift!" replied Ryo. She turned back, and waved to Ally, "Hey, over here!"

"There she is… And as lovely as ever! Ryo, what's up?" asked Heiji as Ally brought the car to a screeching halt.

"Take me to a bar, I need a drink! These kids have been boring the hell out of me for the past year!" said Ryo quickly as she hopped into the driver's seat, scooting Ally over. She glanced in her rearview, and then looked back at Odori. "Odori, um…. You're very… Pregnant…"

"Really? What a revelation," replied Odori in a deadpan tone.

"Okay, Ryo, what's the scoop, eh?" asked Ally.

"Heiji, you look good," said Ryo with a smile, "You lose some weight?"

"Was I really that heavy?" Heiji inquired.

"Anyway… Going back to Ally's question…" Ryo started, "Fuji needs help… She sent me a note?"

"From where?" Ally inquired.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you…" Ryo chuckled, "Let's just say she picked out a good hiding spot… She's in the last place we would suspect…"

"Oh, God, she isn't dead, is she?" asked Ally.

"Nah, that's one of the first places I'd suspect her to be in…" responded Ryo.

Saint Lucia of the Light Convent, Rome:

"May we please speak with Sister Francis?" Ryo asked the mother superior sweetly as the others stood behind her in the cathedral uncomfortably.

"The Sister? Whatever for?" asked Mother Superior.

"Her brother is in trouble," replied Ryo. "It's quite urgent."

"I see! Well, I'll be right back with her, then!" said the nun, rushing into the batch to fetch Sister Francis.

"I still don't know why we're here…." said Yukiko as she shifted from foot to foot and looked about the forebodingly darkened church. "God almighty these places give me the creeps…"

"I kind of don't know how you got in here, Yukiko… I thought demons were barred out of churches," said Ryo with mock surprise.

"Eh heh heh… You're just lucky I can't say anything to you in here," snapped Yukiko.

The two discontinued their talking, and all fell dead as Sister Francis entered. This was, no doubt, Fujiko Lupin, or, as she was better known, Lupin the Fourth…It was apparent not only through her face, but through her bust. All gaped in shock at the sight of the benign Fuji, who smiled at them warmly.

"Greetings…. I'm glad I could join you…" said Fuji serenely.

"Knock off the act. You're a virgin and I'm Matt Dillon," snapped Ryo in a whisper. "What's going on, Fuji?"

"I haven't seen any action in a year. All of the priests here are either really dedicated or only like one another, if you catch my drift," Fuji whispered confidentially to Ryo, "I am going to be so happy to get outta here… They make me wear a sports bra so I won't distract the male students…"

"Well, what are you waiting for?" asked Ryo quietly.

"There's a reason I'm here, Ryo-san," said Fuji, "And they're standing outside right now…"

"Huh?" Ryo turned her head, and watched as the stained glass windows were smashed out by bullets. Some praying nuns scattered or ran out of the cathedral, but Fuji jumped onto the altar and began to fire her Walther P-38, which she kept hidden beneath her long skirt.

"Hey, save some for me!" Yukiko laughed, and drew her own weapon, and fired it out the busted window.

Odori ran forward and drew Zantetsuken, and disabled several intruders as they approached. The attackers were dressed in 19th century Western European military uniforms, which would have been considered unusual by the group had they discontinued shooting and stabbing long enough.

"Dori, be careful!" Heiji shouted as he slapped one of the attackers on the face with his laptop, "Hey, there's an escape!" he called, and led them out through an exit in the back, towards the prayer garden. Heiji was first to jump the fence, and Odori nearly sliced off Toshiro's head as he attempted to lift her over.

"Thank you, but I'm not helpless," snapped Odori, who then preceded to jump the fence. Toshiro looked at Heiji, shrugged, and then climbed over the fence. The others soon followed, and Ryo and Toshiro disappeared, but soon returned with the Alpha Romeo and Vespa.

"Aw, Baby, Mommy missed ya!" Fuji said, briefly hugging the vehicle before jumping in next to Ryo. She ripped off the habit as Ryo pressed upon the gas, the unknown assailants now following in 30's era vehicles. She took a cigarette from Ryo's purse, lit it, and sat back calmly in the midst of gunfire Ally and Yukiko exchanged with their followers. "Okay, first thing I'm gonna do when I get to a hotel is go on a shopping spree, get drunk, find a male hooker, and shack up for the night!"

"Please tell me you didn't get us all together so we could just help you get lucky…" said Ryo with an annoyed snap as she made a sharp turn, nearly running Toshiro off of the road.

"Nah, it's more important than that," replied Fuji, "Hey, wanna go steal some crap? I haven't smelt that sweet smell of Chanel No.5 in what feels like years!"

"I guess you'll tell me what's going on afterwards, then…" sighed Ryo. She shuddered as one of her rearview mirrors was shot out, and she glared, "That lousy son of a bitch…" She turned around, and Fuji quickly took hold of the wheel in order to keep them from driving off of the road while Ryo fired her gun, busting out one of their tires and sending them falling into a ditch.

"Bastards…" Ryo mumbled as she turned back around and took the wheel once more, "I'll show them… Deface an antique like the Romeo…"

Later that Evening, an Italian Club:

"So? Just do it and take him for all he's worth!" Ryo laughed.

"It isn't that simple, Ryo-san!" Fuji said worriedly. It was hard for Fuji to look worried in between the two handsome Italian men she had picked up some time during the evening, "It's really starting to freak me out!"

"So, some guy wants to marry Lupin the Fourth? You just tell him no," Ryo shrugged. "I've done it lots of times!"

"You don't think I friggin' tried that already!?" Fuji yelled, grabbing her alcoholic beverage and taking a swig of it after speaking. "That's why I went into hiding! I sent a polite letter calmly refusing the offer, and they sent one back saying they were going to send me home to my parents in pieces!"

"Jeeze, Fuji, I didn't know you could get shaken so easily…" Ryo admitted.

"Listen, it just smells of raw fish, if you ask me and…" Fuji trailed off, and Ryo turned her head to see what the young Lupin had set her eyes upon. It was Heiji, who was walking towards the bar. Ryo turned back to Fuji, and looked at her questioningly.

"Someone certainly changed…" said Fuji with a smile. "Ke hee hee… Mommy likey…"

"You really are a shallow perv," Ryo sighed in disgust. "And here I was thinking a year and a convent would've changed you! But you haven't budged in terms of personality an inch!"

"What!?" Fuji snapped, "Ryoko, it was like a prison in there! If it felt good, you couldn't do it! Their idea of fun was Bible Bingo, okay!? I called _numbers_!"

"Still doesn't mean you're getting into his pants…" said Ryo as she took a sip of her brightly colored alcoholic drink. "He still remembers when you turned him down, and trust me, he's just like his dad. He doesn't forget that sort of stuff easily…"

Fuji smirked, "Ah, we'll see… I'll just work my charms!"

"Now you've got me scared… What are you doing now?" asked Ryo as she watched Fuji remove a piece of paper from her pocket and begin to write.

"Sending a letter to a couple of dear friends of mine…" answered Fuji nonchalantly.

Interpol H.Q., Paris, France, a few days later:

"Hey, LeBlanc, Boss wants to see you," said an Interpol worker with a sly smirk as he opened the door to Leo LeBlanc's office. Leo sighed heavily and laid down his file, and rose from the table. He knew what the smirk meant; it was well known by this time that he was the bitch of the boss, Cecilia. He passed a photograph as he went to open the door; it was one of him and Max. He missed Zenigata… It had been a year and a half since the Lupin gang had disassembled, and Zenigata had left. He pushed his way out, and numbly walked down the corridor to Cecilia's office. He gave another heavy sigh, undid his tie, removed his jacket, and began to unbutton his shirt as he opened her office door.

"You wanted to see me?" asked Leo, looking downward at the ground. He flushed as he looked upward and saw several prominent officers staring back at him, and he quickly began to dress once again, "Um, yes, Chief?"

"Inspector LeBlanc, we received a note from Lupin," Cecilia started in a professional tone while her eyes shot daggers at Leo, "Apparently she's at her old tricks again… This time in a small province near Germany…"

"Really!?" Leo gasped excitedly. So Fuji was all right! Leo smiled widely at the thought of chasing her once again.

"And Inspector Diaz from Brazil and Inspector Cole from England will be overseeing it… So I suggest you hand them your files," Cecilia added. "I believe you still have them in your office…"

"Wait, shouldn't I be going?" Leo asked.

"Well, you know as well as I do that you're much too valuable an asset here…" said Cecilia with a smile.

"Of course…" Leo gave a sideways glance, "I'll go get those files… Chief, why don't you come down with me? They're heavy," Cecilia complied, and followed Leo down to his office, where he promptly slammed the door behind her. "You know I want that case!"

"But what would I do without you?" Cecilia asked with a smirk as she laid a hand upon Leo's face, "I wouldn't want anything bad to happen to you… Plus, I know you're going to ask to have Zenigata assigned to the case once again, and that's out of the question…"

"Why did Max leave?" asked Leo. "And why do I know you had a lot to do with it?"

Cecilia grabbed Leo by the tie, and bent him downward to her level, "Because he was too close to you… And you know what they say about office romances…"

"Yeah, I do," Leo smirked suddenly, and leaned in and kissed her.

"That's my boy…" Cecilia said quietly, "What do you say? I'll send some inspectors out to give a tour, and we've got some time to ourselves…"

"Sounds good," Leo responded.

Needless to say, several inspectors led the visiting officials around, and half an hour later, Leo was whistling to himself as he re-buttoned his shirt, and this drew upon Cecilia's curiosity.

"What are you so cheery about, LeBlanc?" Cecilia inquired.

"Well, you know I'm in here alone, and, well, I've gotten into technology a little bit recently…" Leo walked back over to the computer, and began to type away, "That includes a video recorder, which I switched on while you were busy with me…" he seated himself in front of the computer, and then rolled away to show Cecilia the film. Much to her horror, it was the events of the past half hour. Leo smiled widely and stopped the film, and leaned upon his desk, "Now, I'm sure you don't want some of those visiting officials to see this, now would you? You could lose your job! It'd be in all of the papers!"

"You little rat bastard!" Cecilia hissed through gritted teeth, "You bloody tricked me, you little BASTARD!"

"Yep," Leo smiled, "…Well?"

"Fine, you win," Cecilia grumbled.

"And Max is on the case with me," Leo added.

"You son of a bitch… I hope you two have fun together!" Cecilia said. She opened Leo's door, and shouted to her secretary, "Margaret! Get a hold of that blond Asian in Romania! He's on the Lupin case… With Inspector Lu--I mean LeBlanc…" She gave another glare in Leo's direction before she left, and Leo leaned back in his chair, smiled, and waited.

A Paris, France Airport, a Few Days Later:

"Where is he?" Leo wondered as he paced back and forth nervously. The airplane continued to filter out, and Leo smiled as he watched a familiar 'blond idiot' walk out of the long hall and trip as he did so. He excused himself, but accidentally knocked over a young woman in the process, and he excused himself once again hurriedly.

"Same idiot…" Leo sighed with a shake of the head, "Hey, Max!" he called.

"Leo!" Max ran towards his friend, and lifted Leo up as he embraced him. This was some feat, considering Leo was still almost four inches taller. "You look exactly the same! How are you!?"

"Great! How about yourself!?" asked Leo happily, "Here, let me help you with your bags! What have you been up to?"

"Hey, I should ask you the same!" Max laughed as he allowed Leo to take his carryon, "How in the hell did you talk Cecilia into letting us back on the case?"

"Blackmail!" replied Leo cheerily, "I made a Paris Hilton-esque video of us, and threatened to show it to her boss!"

"Why… You little… I'm so proud of you!" Max put Leo in a seemingly playful headlock, but Leo did not see the fun in choking, which Zenigata was causing him to do.

Later, Leo's Apartment:

"How're things with Jake?" Leo asked from his kitchen. He had busied himself fixing a drink for Max while Max looked about Leo's apartment, which had undergone serious renovations, which included many pictures of his family.

"Eh, sorta rocky…" Max replied hesitantly, "He had a kid get sick and had to leave the company… He left it to a total bastard…"

"Oh, so he didn't leave her for you?"

"Nope, but she found out! I've never had someone drive across town and wake me up in the middle of the night just so they could spit in my face," Max sighed heavily.

"Sorry to hear that… Well, were you seeing anyone else right now?" asked Leo as he walked out of the kitchen with their drinks. Max gratefully took his drink and watched as Leo seated himself in a chair opposite of himself in the living room.

"Nah, too much trouble… And how about yourself?"

"Nope," Leo replied. "Not as of today, that is… Someone accidentally let that Cecilia file leak onto the internet, and now it's spreading through Napster quicker than a rumor spreads through bloggers…"

"…You really are like your dad, you know…"

"You are what you try not to be," Leo shrugged, "But the most I've stolen in years is a few packets of complimentary Sweet 'n Low… And that's only because I was low…"

"Hey, I've got an idea!" said Max cheerfully. "Is that one place downtown still open? We can head over there before we leave for Germany in the morning!"

"Which place?" asked Leo.

"Um… You still have that thing with women, don't you?"

"Yeah," said Leo with a roll of the eyes. "Believe me, it kills my social life! Cecilia's made me even more neurotic, if anything else…"

"Well, I've got a great club for you then!" said Max cheerfully.

"…It's a gay club, isn't it!?" Leo snapped after a pause.

"Work with me, LeBlanc," sighed Max.

"You had a whole double life while you lived here!" Leo said with a disbelieving laugh.

"Well… I heard from a guy, who heard from a guy, who had some free passes that worked their way to me…" said Max flippantly.

"Well, I… You know I'm not really…." Leo scratched the back of his head in worry. "The last time I went into one of those clubs, I almost had some big guy carry me away…"

"Hey, we'll wait until Germany, then… They have better clubs than France, anyway! No offense," said Max with a well meaning smile. "It's just that my sister lived in Germany when she went to college… She knows all of the great places!"

"Sounds great," said Leo with a twitch of a smile. "Hey, I'm gonna turn in… I'm exhausted…"

"All right. Good night, LeBlanc," said Max to Leo as Leo walked into his bedroom.

Leo trudged into his room, and leaned after his door after closing it, "What the hell is it with me where I have both men and women wanting me? Is it because I'm a Lupin? Jesus, Dad wasn't kidding when he talked about magnetism… I just didn't know my magnet was attractive on both sides! Oi, this is gonna be hard… He's home one day and he's asking me out to clubs… Maybe I'm just reading too much into it, and I need to sleep… Yeah, that's it… I need sleep… Sleep, yeah…"

Meanwhile, in Italy, in a Hotel Room:

Odori was exhausted, and had passed out in the women's room. Ryo was facing off against Yukiko in a video game, and Fuji was nowhere to be seen. She did appear moments later, standing crestfallen in the doorway, "That's no way to treat a lady!" Fuji yelled angrily out in the hall.

"Start acting like a lady and I'll treat you like one!" Heiji shouted in return. The sound of a door slamming down the hall moments later.

"I take it someone's not getting lucky?" Ryo chuckled, "Ha! Beat that score, Yukiko!"

"You and your damn racing games… Let's play a first-person shooter, and see who wins that!"

"Oh, here's one we oughta like…" Ryo said, pulling out a video game from the pouch.

"Yeah? What's it called?" asked Yukiko.

"_Lupin III: Legend of the Sorcerer King_… More American merchandise Lupin didn't give the okay to…" said Ryo absently.

"He was a wanted criminal; you think he really would've shown up in court to stop them?" Yukiko snorted. "Plus, let's face it, he's always been an egomaniac and loves the attention…"

"They made Dad's nose look so pointy!" said Ryo to herself. "Daddy was never incredibly photogenic…"

"I'm gonna take a nap!" Fuji announced, "Jeeze… Dori gained a lot of weight!"

"That's because she's pregnant, Fujiko," Ryo said with a heavy sigh. "I… I know that you have a brain somewhere… I just don't where it is sometimes, Fuji…"

"Woah! Really!?"

"No, I'm lying," Ryo mumbled. "I'm makin' it allll up, Fuji…"

"She shouldn't be sleeping on the floor, then!" Fuji said, "Dori-chan… Wakey wakey…"

"Stick 'chan' on my name again and I'll filet you…" Odori grumbled.

"Sleep on the bed! You'll hurt your back on a tatami mat!" Fuji chided, "Here, we'll share mine, okay?" Fuji announced, and fluffed the pillows to her bed. "Heiji's dead wrong if he thinks I can't be nice!"

"Oh, he knows you can be nice… He just thinks you incapable of not being a whore…" replied Ryo.

Yukiko laughed, and went to light a cigarette, but Fuji quickly ran over and threw the lit cigarette in Ryo's glass of water. Yukiko looked upward at Fuji, stunned, "Hey, what gives!?" she demanded.

"No smoking around her… You want to kill your lungs, do it in the fresh air! Then hopefully you'll void out some of the harm you're doing to yourself!" snapped Fuji.

Ryo, at this time, reached for her glass of water, and spat it out after taking a sip of it, "What… What the hell!? There's a cigarette butt in here!"

"Hey, she did it!" Yukiko shouted, pointing to Fuji.

The men's room:

"You hear someone yelling?" asked Ally.

"Nope," Toshiro and Heiji answered in unison. Heiji was at the table, working with his laptop and equipment, while Ally resigned to polishing his sniper rifle. Jigen glanced upward as he noticed Toshiro rise from his bed, and he realized Ishikawa was preparing for bed. He blinked in surprise as Toshiro let his gi top fall onto the bed, allowing the presence of a bullet wound near his right shoulder blade be made apparent.

"Toshiro, where'd you get that?" asked Ally.

"Hm? Oh, that… It's nothing…" replied Toshiro, "Just gets a little sore…"

"That bullet got lodged in you, didn't it? And that's damn big puncture…" Ally mumbled, "You didn't have that before…"

"Um… Things got a little hairy in Portugal…" Toshiro started, "Some men looking for La Blanca Diabla tracked her down, and… I took the bullet for her…"

"Why'd you do something like that?" asked Ally.

"Because he loves her," said Heiji from his quiet corner, "Anyone have a Phillips head screwdriver?"

"…A what?" Toshiro asked with confusion.

"Never mind… I'll use the flathead…" Heiji sighed tiredly. "How soon before you think Max and Leo are going to be on our tails?"

"Not soon enough, if you ask me!" said Ally with a laugh as he looked downward at his rifle cheerily. "Hey, did anyone happen to notice if there were any squirrels around?"

"There's a park three blocks away," Toshiro replied.

"Excellent…." Ally smiled, and looked out at the night sky.

"You see a pair of laughing eyes… And suddenly you're sighing sighs… You're thinking nothing's wrong you string along boy then snap…" Toshiro sang in a mumble to himself as he continued to prepare for bed. "Those eyes, those sighs, they're part of the tender trap…"

"If you're going to sing show tunes the entire time I may go back to wanting to kill you horribly again, Toshiro," said Ally quietly.

"Ha ha… Get some sleep, Jigen…. The inspectors are going to be after us soon, and we don't want you to get injured," said Toshiro with a smirk. "Carmen will want you home in one piece, after all…."

"Yeah… Good night, Goemon," Ally yawned, and laid his rifle under his pillow, as he usually did.


	2. Brilliant Disguise

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Lupin III, and—Wait, he isn't even in this chapter!!

Hi!

Sorry this chapter's a little late in coming, but someone just had to come down with a cold…. Eck… Nothing like watching talk shows all day… Anyway, I received a great deal of positive response from the first chapter, so I hope this next chapter does just as well. Remember that feedback is always appreciated, and I'll see you all again hopefully sooner than two weeks!

Fun Fact of Boredom: Speaking of disguises… Ming and then Ryo have the love for bracelets due to song lyrics from the oldie hit _Judy in Disguise_. 'Keep a wearing your bracelets/and your new ra ra/cross your heart yeah/with your living bra'. Hey, I don't understand those lyrics, either, but the song of a flashy girl in disguise seemed to fit Ming, and it was only natural Ryo carried on the tradition.

Chapter Two

A Short Time Later: Brilliant Disguise

_'Golden slumbers fill your eyes,_

_Smiles await you when you rise,' _

—The Beatles, _'Golden Slumbers'_

A Small Province Outside of Germany:

"So, about the same size as Cagliostro, huh?" Ally repeated as he sat in the back seat with Heiji and Odori, as they had so long ago.

"Yeah… Place thinks of itself as its own country… It's really shut away from the rest of modern civilization… Less than ten percent of the population owns a television, and there aren't any American or Western stores to be found, anywhere! It kind of kept itself secluded even after the Berlin wall fell, and, well, no one talks about it and it keeps its mouth shut. But apparently their ruler is more vicious than he lets on…"

"Wait, so, a guy wanted to marry Leo?" asked Ryo.

"Heh, I had no clue Max was royalty!" Heiji laughed.

"Ha, ha… Yuck it up… Not funny… But this guy ain't taking no for an answer, so that's why I'm taking all of my murderous friends along with me! Because I personally loathe killing!" she said brightly with a smile. "Over here, Ryo-san…"

"That huge palace? You sure they'll let us in? I'm not exactly dressed for the occasion," Ryo admitted.

"Yeah, well, wearing jeans when you're in a popular band of thieves is a little gauche," Fuji started.

"Your father wore gray jeans," Ryo was quick to point out.

"And he also wore a Barbie pink and seafoam green jacket at different points in his life," Fuji added. "I was fortunate enough to inherit my mother's sense of style."

"And her fanbase…" Ryo mumbled.

"Here are the gates," Fuji whispered, and ducked down at little low as Ryo and Toshiro pulled up next to one another in front of the gates.

"Hey, let us in!" Ryo shouted.

"You have no business here!" shouted the guard at the front gate.

"Let us through or I'll cut you ribbons!" Odori shouted, gripping onto Zantetsu.

"Huh… Shouldn't you be home knitting?" asked the guard with a slight chuckle.

"No, Dori!" Heiji quickly gripped onto her as she went to go fight the guard, and Ryo continued, clearing her throat.

"We've got Lupin the Fourth," Ryo began.

"Where?" asked the guard. Yukiko raised an eyebrow and looked over at Toshiro as she noticed this guard was dressed the same way their attackers in Italy had been.

"Right here," Ryo nodded to Fuji. The guard gave way to a little smile, and a little laugh as well.

"Very… Very well… Enter!" he said in a whooping laugh which caused uneasiness amongst the group as they passed through the iron gates, hearing them clang in the background as they entered the mainly stone and sculpture courtyard, which in the center held a large running fountain. Fuji smiled as she laid eyes upon the fountain, but then turned her attention back to the large household in front of them.

"Holy crap," Yukiko said aloud as she stared stunned at the large household. "It's a friggin' palace!"

"Rulers usually reside in those," replied Toshiro with a heavy sigh. "The gardens are astounding…"

"You gonna take clippings for your herb garden?" Yukiko asked wryly.

"We're here to see Von Idle," shouted Fuji as Ryo stopped the car in front of the large doorway.

"So that's the name of Fuji's stalker…" said Odori to herself.

"Leave the vehicles here," another equally large guard ordered, "Guards! Take their luggage to their prepared rooms!"

"Huh… So I guess they were expecting us, eh?" Fuji said as she hopped out of the cars with the others. They walked into the large palace, and were told to wait in front of another set of large wooden doors. It was a long while before the doors opened and the group was sawn in by a butler. Von Idle was sitting in a study, many books on a large wooden desk forming a sort of fortress. Von Idle was tall, with long blonde hair, and a stern expression and sharp facial futures.

"Hey, he isn't half bad to look at…." Fuji admitted, much to Ryo's shock, "Baron Von Idle? I'm Lupin the Fourth—The one you threatened to tear to pieces if I didn't marry you. You still remember me?"

"Baron?" Von Idle wondered aloud in a thick German accent. "Wait… _You_ are Lupin?"

"What'd you want, my dad?!" Fuji inquired with a chuckle, "I am the one and only… Black-haired, busty and beautiful as ever!"

"I was just expecting… Aren't there two of you? Don't you have a brother?" Von Idle asked.

"Yeah, but he legally changed his name, so now I'm carrying on the family lineage!" replied Fuji with a smile.

"Well… You certainly are boisterous…" Von Idle.

"Hey, it don't take a rocket scientist to figure out that I've got big—"

"That isn't what it means!" Ryo hissed, "Shut up before you make yourself look even more like an idiot!"

"I must admit, you do look a great deal like your mother," Von Idle rose, and walked over to Fuji. The Baron was dressed in attire which looked to be from the late 18th century, and Von Idle exchanged a smile with Fuji. "I suppose you'll do, after all."

"Wait, you still want to marry me!?" Fuji choked.

Von Idle nodded, "Yes."

"I thought you'd wan to call it off! Might I ask friggin' why, then!?" Fuji wondered aloud.

"Because many years ago, your great-grandfather, the original Arséne Lupin, entered our country… A local fortune teller told him that when the fourth generation emerges, our two families shall unite when my people are in time of need," responded Von Idle with a smile that made all uneasy. "And, apparently, it has come true…"

"Um… Heh heh, I hate to tell you this, man, but I'm not exactly marrying material! I mean, I look awful in virgin white, and there's a good reason to it, too!"

"Then you can wear a light blue wedding dress," replied Von Idle with another eerie smile. As the baron passed Odori, the samurai sniffed the air, and tilted her head to a side. She was clearly puzzled by something, but she did not say what.

"Uh… Hee hee… Um, I…" Fuji took a few steps back as Von Idle approached, and cracked a nervous smile. This nervousness then faded, and a smile came upon Fuji's face. Ryo could tell that Fuji was up to her usual tricks.

"Sounds good… Hey, why don't you give these guys a tour?" asked Fuji, nodding to her team, "I'll need someone to sit at my side in the church."

"Wait, what? Did I hear you right?" Yukiko asked in disbelief.

"Come on," several guards appeared, and quickly led them out of the study.

"Hey, don't worry about me, guys!" Fuji said, waving good-bye to her friends as they were locked out.

"Come with us," said the guards, leading the gang up a large flight of stairs to their rooms. When they were partway up the stairwells, they heard a scream emit from the study. All immediately ran down, Toshiro quickly disabling the guards and joining the others down the long passage.

"Fuji, we're coming!" Ryo shouted.

Meanwhile, on the road:

"Are you sure you read these right, Zenigata?" Leo sighed tiredly as he adjusted his glasses and read over the map, "I could've sworn we should've hit a toll bridge by now!... Max, where are you going?"

"Dammit, LeBlanc, I don't know! Do you want to give the wheel a try?" snapped Max.

"Like I wanted to an hour ago?" Leo sighed as he folded his map and tossed it into the back seat of the police cruiser, "We should ask for directions… I can speak German, so we ought to be okay."

"Like hell I'm going to pull over! We're on a roll, I can feel it!" said Max excitedly.

"I'm starting to wonder if I should be leaving breadcrumbs…" Leo muttered as he rested his head against the window of the car. "Hey! Hey, there it is!"

"Really!? Where!?"

"It's that huge building in front of us, Zenigata."

"Hey, I found it!"

"You—Yeah, yeah, Max… Ya found it… Now let's just try to get in, get Fuji and the gang, and get out of there as soon as possible, okay? I've heard nothing but bad news from this place…"

"Really? Like what?" asked Max, his voice apparent with curiosity.

"Well… A lot of people just disappear around here, that's all… And there's also rumor that they're notorious for sales in illegal weapons… They're also known as the only country on Earth who still sides with the losing side of the Second World War…."

By this time, Max slammed upon his brakes, which caused Leo to lurch forward, and then fall back into his seat, "These people are Na—"

"Cool it, Max… It's all just speculation! Just stuff that passes over my desk in the office!" Leo sighed, "Keep driving, okay?"

"Hey, the Alfa Romeo… And that goofy Vespa… They're past those gates!" Max said as he resumed driving drove up to the front gates of the palace.

"Guess they're here already," Leo added. Max brought the car to a halt, and looked upward at the large guard, and smiled at him hopefully. The guard did not smile in return, but instead leered downward at Max.

"Guten! Max Zenigata, Leo LeBlanc—Interpol," said Leo, showing his badge to the guard.

"I understand English," snapped the guard. "And I take it you both do, too."

"Yeah, fluently," replied Leo with a nod.

"Then you'll understand when I tell you you're out of jurisdiction here and if you both don't leave, you'll be escorted out," snapped the guard.

"What!?" Zenigata shrieked, and Leo grabbed Max in order to keep Zenigata from lunging at the guard, who only laughed as he looked upon Max's expression. "Lupin's in there, and you're going to have US arrested!? Do you all have any idea what kind of a criminal you're housing!?"

"Well, I know two which we won't be housing," answered the guard. "Interpol does nothing except trample upon the liberties of smaller nations. You all, as far as this country is concerned, are a group of International bullies…"

"Bullies!?" Max fumed, and Leo once again grabbed Zenigata before Max did anything stupid, "This is such bull s—"

"M-Max! Come on, let's just go make some phone calls, okay?" Leo asked, "We'll call some people to take care of this…"

"No way! I don't let anyone talk to me like that!" Max growled, "If I wasn't on duty, I'd—"

"Max!" Leo shouted.

"Heh… I'd listen to your mother back there, Inspector," said the guard with a smirk. "Or, is that your girlfriend? By the way you let him boss you around, perhaps I'm wrong, and you're his girlfriend…"

"Come on, Max, just back up. _Please_," Leo whispered. Max gritted his teeth together, backed away, and drove away from the palace angrily.

"What was up with you grabbing me!?" snapped Max.

"These people have rooftop snipers everywhere," Leo answered. Max looked in his rearview mirror, and, sure enough, there the snipers were. "They were all aimed at our car! Now, I know I've got a good shot, but I don't think I could ward off that many…"

"Well, then what the hell are we supposed to do?" Max inquired.

"You forget that I was once a convict and I learned certain tips from the dark side to use on the light side," replied Leo.

"Okay, quit talking in Jedi and tell me what you're up to…" said Max suspiciously.

"Well, Fuji won't be there too long, knowing her, so I'll have to get everything together quickly…"

"Get what together? Leo, what are you planning?" Max inquired.

"Exactly what's your shoe size?"

"Um… Eight, American," replied Max.

"So you'd be an eight… Okay," Leo nodded.

"An eight? What the hell are you talking about!? _Tell me_!" Max shrieked.

"Oh, you'll see, Zenigata…. You'll see…" Leo chuckled.

Inside the Palace:

"Fuji, what's wrong!?" Ryo shouted as Fuji burst through the door and leaned against it, a horrified look drawn upon her face.

"Von Idle… Von Idle…" Fuji panted.

"What'd that creep do to you!?" snapped Heiji fiercely.

"Von Idle's got a rack!" Fuji shrieked.

"What? A rack of what?" asked Odori.

"Your English needs so much work, Dori," sighed Toshiro tiredly.

"She could wear my bras!" Fuji squeaked, "Where the hell was she hiding those, anyway!?"

The unified phrase of the moment, as all took in what Fuji said, appeared to be, "…." Ryo soon broke this silence, however.

"Von Idle's a baroness?" Ryo asked with surprise.

"Apparently! That or he's in touch with his feminine side, not to mention a good plastic surgeon!" Fuji answered frantically. "What am I gonna do!?"

"Hm? Lupin, there you are… I thought you had run off…" Von Idle said as she opened her doorway and looked out at the group. She had removed her coat, and it was now strikingly obvious that Von Idle was indeed a woman. "I think we've been at some sort of misunderstanding…"

"Well no friggin' crap!" Fuji snapped quickly. "Why didn't you say something when I called you a baron!?"

"Thought it'd be better to explain the situation to you away from your teammates," replied Von Idle with a shrug. "Speaking of them, why don't you send them to their rooms?"

"Hey, Lady, we aren't dogs; she doesn't order us around like little puppies, as compared to popular belief," replied a slightly annoyed Yukiko.

"Then I'll have someone escort you," replied Von Idle sternly. "Now, Lupin…"

"I—I've got a headache," Fuji answered. "Can we talk about this tomorrow?" she asked with a hopeful smile.

Von Idle paused, "Very well. We'll continue in the morning… But I warn you, I've got rooftop snipers covering the entire area…. Even if a sword cuts through the wall, there will still be the matter of the heavy guards…"

"Hm… Apparently she doesn't know who I am…" Fuji mumbled, "Guess I'll have to wait on that treasure, after all…"

Later:

The same guard who had stood out earlier with the Lupin gang and then Leo and Max saw something approach in the distance. As it drove into view, it was clearly a Harley-Davidson motorcycle, with Fuji Lupin at the wheel. Gripping onto her was a more paranoid than usual Heiji Ishikawa. Fuji brought the bike to a halt in front of the guard, and smiled as she dismounted.

"Who are you?" the guard demanded.

"Hm… The girl of your dreams," replied Fuji with a smirk. "And… This is Heiji… Hopefully you don't dream about him…"

"Very funny. Now, how did you two get out?" snapped the guard.

"That's easy. I had two other distant associates pose as myself and Heiji while we scoped out the situation… Sneaky, yes, but it worked, and now I know that I can handle the situation, now that I've assessed it," replied Fuji with a smile.

The guard paused, and looked critically at Fuji and Heiji. Heiji moved back as the guard moved inward to take a closer look at him. He put a hand to Heiji's face, and nodded as he felt no mask. "All right…"

"Thanks, Sweetie!" Fuji said cheerily as she hopped back on the Harley and drove through the gates of the palace, "Good job, Zenigata…" Leo whispered.

"It's amazing how close you got to your sister's voice!" Max whispered, "Aren't you a little uncomfortable in that dress, though?"

"Eh, nothing I haven't done before," replied Leo as he pulled up next to the Romeo and Vespa.

"You have no idea how glad I am that pudgy laid off of the donuts… My face is a little bonier than his…." said Max.

"But it's really creepy how much you look like your nephew, Max… Which Zenigata do you guys take after, anyway?" asked Leo.

"My grandpa, actually. My dad looks like my grandmother," Leo stopped at this comment, and looked at Max disbelievingly a few moments before continuing to their raid into the palace. Von Idle was a little surprised to see Fuji and Heiji in the main entrance as she walked down the stairway, but then smirked good humouredly and silently continued.

"What'd he see in her?" Leo inquired.

"The daughter of his boss," responded Max with a shrug. "She really loved him, though… Went a little batty when he died."

Leo paused, "God you guys have got some family…."

"Heh, they aren't exactly normal, but I love them," Max answered with a shrug.

Both stopped at the foot of the stairs, and Fuji and Heiji stared at the Fuji and Heiji look-alikes in shock and surprise.

"I know who those legs belong to, but I don't want to admit it…" said Fuji with a gulp. She reached forward, peeled off the mask, and there, sure enough, stood Leo, wearing her same exact dress. "You know, I know Mom thought it was cute when we dressed alike when we were little, but I think you're carrying it over a little too far…"

"I'm not doing this for the hell of it, Fuji. I'm working a case…."

"Yeah, yeah… Any excuse to shave your legs…"

"I had them waxed, thank you!"

"Ouch," Max shuddered.

"Like you'd know what that was like…" Leo said with a roll of the eyes.

Max turned to him, "Do you any idea what kind of bored and sadistic bastards pass through the doors of the police academy, LeBlanc?"

"Yeow…" Heiji shuddered. "So, may I ask what do we owe the pleasure of the ambiguously gay duo visiting us?"

"Ha ha…" Max said blandly. "I could ask you the same question, Heiji… What the hell's your game, Lupin?"

"Game, no game," replied Fuji with a smile. "Now, tell me, guys—When can I expect to be Aunt Fuji?"

"How about we talk about that in handcuffs?" Max asked menacingly.

"Ph, try to get me out of here, Zenigata… Heiji and I have been going around for the past hour looking for escape routes… We're all trapped like prisoners!"

"What? All of us?" Max yelped.

"Not an unguarded door in this whole facility…." Heiji shrugged. "It's impeccable, really…"

"I'm stuck in a dress!?" Leo yelped.

"Relax, I brought you spare clothes in this stupid laptop case Ishikawa carries around…" Max said, holding up his suitcase.

"Thank God…" Leo muttered as he kicked off his heels.

"Ur… You may want to keep those… I forgot your shoes…" Zenigata added innocently.

"WHAT!?" Leo shouted angrily.

"Well…. Hey, they don't seem to be any trouble to walk in…"

"Then why don't _you_ try?" Leo hissed.

"Eh, no, thanks," Max answered, shaking his head. "I'm a huge klutz in anything with heels… Even cowboy boots give me trouble!"

"Just wait until we're out of here… Then I'll give you trouble…" Leo grumbled as he stepped back into his heels.

"Um, hey, I was wondering if I could ask you guys a teensy, tiny favor?" Fuji asked meekly. "Could you…. Kind of… Um… Help… Me?"

Leo and Max stood there placid for a few minutes before Max broke into a wild fit of laughter, followed by Leo, who leaned against his friend for balance. "Why would we help you!?"

"Because this crazy lady wants to marry Lupin the Forth…." Fuji responded.

"But what do you have to do with it?" asked Leo.

"You gave up your name! She wants me!" Fuji shuddered, "I can't do it! C'mon, fellas, please, for old time's sake help Fuji, huh? C'mon, bro, what do you say? Come on… Think about everything nice I've ever done for you!"

"…That gives me even more reason_ not _to help you, Fuji," snapped Leo after a pause. "We're going to find a way out of here, and then we're both taking you in… But that's only if you find me comfortable shoes…"

After stealing away an extra pair of Ally's shoes and after Leo and Max changed out of their disguises, Leo went to inspecting the palace, Fuji, Heiji and Max following closely behind him.

"There's always a trap door… Palaces, especially around this age, usually had one, in case the peasants revolted…. They'd have a back way to escape… It's all a matter of finding it…" said Leo, feeling about the stone wall for any sign of a trap door. "Let's see… Nope, not there… Na-ah…"

Max averted his eyes from Leo, and looked to Fuji, who was smiling strangely at both he and Heiji, "What exactly are you looking at?"

"I love twins," she responded with a wide smile. Max immediately tore off his black wig and glared at her, Fuji smiling in return. "Oh, don't be so modest, Zenigata… LeBlanc's enough of a prude, I would think."

"What's that exactly supposed to mean?" asked Leo as he peaked over a high ledge, but to no avail.

"I'm just surprised you two haven't, you know, yet," Fuji shrugged.

"Yeah… Hey, don't we still have that bet going on, Fuji?" asked Heiji.

"What bet would that be exactly?" Max snapped.

"Well… I'm betting that LeBlanc will kiss you…" Heiji started.

"And I'm betting you're going to kiss LeBlanc, Zenigata," Fuji added with a smile.

"You both have nothing better to do with yourselves?" Max asked blandly.

"How much is that bet, exactly?" Leo inquired.

"Five-hundred yen," Heiji answered.

"That's _it_!?" Max yelled angrily, "That's pocket change!"

"Hm… He's right! Let's make it five thousand American dollars then, huh?" Fuji asked excitedly.

"Sounds good to me. I could really use some new computer parts…"

"And I could use a new pair of shoes!" Fuji added.

"You need a new pair of shoes like you need a new hole in the head, Fuji," Leo said in a murmur. "Ah ha!"

"Ah ha good or ah ha you had to sneeze?" Fuji asked.

"Ah ha here it is!" Leo responded with a smile as he moved away a brick, and it revealed itself to be a door. Leo shoved the door open, and there was a long passageway down a darkened hall. "Anyone got a light?" asked Leo.

"Here," Heiji handed him a small flashlight, and Leo held the door open while Fuji, Heiji and finally Max slowly ventured down.

"Hey, Zenigata, wait a second!" Leo whispered.

"Huh?" Max turned his head, and Fuji and Heiji stopped and looked at the two. Leo pushed Zenigata's face to his and quickly kissed Max on the cheek, leaving the blonde inspector even more stunned than Fuji and Heiji.

"Fuji, pay the man," Leo said with a satisfied smirk.

"You did that just so I'd lose that bet, didn't you!?" Fuji yelled angrily, "You creep!"

"….I'm officially scarred for life…" Heiji said after a long pause.

"Eh, you can probably buy a few hours therapy with your money, Heij…. Now come on, guys…" Leo continued walking, and Heiji and Fuji resumed with him. Heiji turned back and nudged for Max to come, too. Zenigata had been in a sort of stupor until then, and Max nodded, purposely falling back. Fuji caught sight of this, and fell back as well.

"Well, I hope you're happy… I'm out five grand now…. Seems like you and Heiji were the only winners here…" Fuji mumbled. "Dad's gonna be thrilled… His little boy wants to hook up with a Zenigata, and I have a girl after my ass…"

"You guys didn't have any other bets, did you?" Max asked after a long pause.

"Why would you care?" Fuji inquired, raising an eyebrow in suspicion.

"I just don't want him to go along with anymore of your sophomoric antics!" Max snapped critically in response, "He was simply doing that to prove once again that you're always wrong!"

"Do you want me to make a bet about who wakes up first the morning after?" Fuji asked with a sly smile. "I'll do it if you let me off this time…"

"Get a grip. What do you take me for, anyway!?" Max asked angrily.

"You don't want to know the answer to that, Zenigata," Fuji said with somewhat of a wary tone, "But don't come crying to me when he leaves you for some pretty girl and you want my help to reel him back in…. Because good ole' Fujiko's door will have shut… The L Train will have left the station, you hear me, Zenigata?"

"Do you have an off switch somewhere?" Max asked in a tired mumble.

"It's called a blank check, Blondie," Fuji responded.

"Hey, guys, quiet!" Heiji whispered, coming to a dead halt. "What'd you find, Leo?"

"Holy… Wow…" Leo whistled and adjusted his glasses, "I don't believe it…"

"What's up, LeBlanc?" asked Max, pushing his way forward.

"It's a door…" Leo said in awe. He turned to the other three, "It's made out of gold!"

Upstairs:

"No sign of escape for miles…" Yukiko said with a shake of the head as she looked out her window and then turned back to Toshiro. He was pacing back and forth, trying to get any reception at all on his cell phone. Yukiko watched as he threw it to the floor, and jumped a little with surprise.

"I'm guessing the reception here sucks?" Yukiko inquired.

"Not only that… I was roaming…" Toshiro mumbled darkly, "We're all trapped!"

"Hey, maybe not…" Yukiko smiled suddenly as she saw a bird fly past her window. "Could you… Talk to one of your friends here?"

"The bird? Why?" Toshiro inquired.

"Just get the damn bird," Yukiko sighed. Toshiro nodded, and opened the window. He kneeled down on the small seat in front of the window, and removed some bird feed from a pocket. He held out his hand, and a pigeon was quickly attracted. He slowly and gently clasped his hand about the bird, and brought it back into the room.

"That a girl…" Toshiro cooed reassuringly to the small creature, who ate ravenously from his hand. "Now what, Yukiko?"

"Here," Yukiko took a small piece of paper from the desk table, and wrapped it about the bird's foot. "Now we'll need something shiny, like, um… What? What can we use?"

"Will a paperclip work?" Toshiro asked hopefully.

"Yeah," Yukiko nodded, and took a paperclip readily from the desk. She tied a small string to the bird's foot, and tied the paperclip to this. "Now let him go…"

"She's a girl," Toshiro corrected. "The plumage is different…"

"…Hrm… Well pardon me…" Yukiko muttered, "Touchy…"

"Sorry, I tend to get a little anxious when trouble is afoot…" Toshiro mumbled to himself as he sat upon the bed and leaned against the wall it was up against. "I have the feeling that there is more to this than we know. Fuji could escape if she wanted, you and I both know that."

"True… She did seem really freaked out over Von Idle, though. I wonder what's so great that's keeping her here…" Yukiko wondered out loud.

"Sometimes I wonder what keeps us here," Toshiro snorted.

"I just went because you wanted to," Yukiko shrugged. "I guess I'm to the point where I'm dependant on you, as friggin' sad as that sounds."

"Well, I am all that you have outside of your family," Toshiro reminded her with a small smirk of pride.

"How'd my life get to this, again?" Yukiko asked, "Bonding with the Bird man of Brooklyn."

"Hm, very funny," Toshiro sighed. "There isn't much to do until we wait for Fuji's signal to fight. There's no way we can all get out of here without working together. It'd be stupid or reckless to try anything else."

"Hey, I'm all for stupid and reckless, but I'm just out of ideas!" Yukiko admitted as she looked out the window once more. "Hopefully someone'll find that note and call the police, as much as I'd hate to get help from the right side of the law."

Back at the Gold Door:

"This is it!" Fuji said happily, "Oh wow, oh mommy… I can't believe it! Yes! Ha ha… Mommy's gonna be vacationing in Fiji for a long time, Boys."

"Not if I have anything to say about it…" Max replied crankily, "What's the story with this door?"

"Von Idle's great-grandfather was a ruthless thief… Made my own dear sweet great-grandpa shake in his frilly French boots… They did one gig together, and that was steal an entire room," Fuji explained.

"A room of what?" asked Heiji.

Fuji smiled wide, and there was a twinkle in her eye as she spoke, "Solid gold… They moved it out, piece by piece… Then they got into an argument, and Great-grandpa had to leave it, but promising to come back one day for it… He never did, so I will!"

"How come you always seem to hear these stories, and I never do?" asked Leo tiredly.

"I'm taking it back in the name of the Lupin clan!" Fuji announced happily.

"That's why you're risking your life, and also risking the possibility of becoming the wife of some crazed woman?" Max inquired, raising an eyebrow in interest.

"Yep! Honor of the family, Zenigata-sama," Fuji answered. "Now who wants to help me blow this door open, huh!?"

"This is in Russian… Fuji, this belongs to the Russian government!" Leo said as he studied the door more thoroughly.

"Yeah… Well, you think the Romanovs would've had an easier time keeping out revolting peasants, as tightly shut as this thing is…" Fuji muttered as she studied the lock upon the door closely. "We may even need a small bomb, Heiji!"

"Do you, like, forget that we're here!?" Max shouted angrily.

Fuji looked up from the lock at Zenigata, "What, do you know how to open locks, Max?"

"Yes, but I'm not going to tell you!" Max shouted in response, "What the hell kind of a joke of an inspector do you take me for!?"

"A pretty damn funny one," Fuji admitted. "Speaking of jokes, Leo, Dad wanted you to know that he saw that video you posted on the Internet… The one with you and your Interpol boss."

"What!?" Leo yelped, horrified, "What'd he say!?"

"Good job," Fuji answered. "But he has a list of pointers for you."

"Yeah, I typed it up. Here's the first page," Heiji removed a list from his shirt pocket, and passed it to Leo. LeBlanc read over it, and his face reddened, and he quickly hid it away in a jacket pocket, horrified at what his father had written.

"Okay, I think I've got it!" Fuji said triumphantly.

"Oh, but I think we've got you, my Dear," Fuji gulped as she heard this uttered, and turned around to see Von Idle and a barrage of guards staring back at their small party.

"Aw, crap…" Max muttered in a low voice, "Here we go…"

"Exactly!" Fuji yelled, quickly taking Heiji by the hand and running into one of the long darkened tunnels.

"Hey, wait for us!" Leo shouted, and pulled Max along with him into the dark tunnel.

"Follow them!" Von Idle ordered, and the guards broke into a run after the two inspectors and two thieves.


	3. Sara

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Lupin III… But, hey, on a happier note, I baked a cake today!

Heya, there!

Ah, another chapter out (finally!!!). Sorry about the wait, but I've been bogged down with so much work as of recent it's been mind-boggling. Anyway, I finally got it out, and I'm glad I've received so much positive response already from the first two chapters. I hope everyone enjoys the next chapter, and please don't hesitate to review! See ya'll around soon!

Fun Fact of Boredom: Why does Ally like hockey? I wanted at least one athletically inclined new Lupin gang member, and hockey is my favorite sport, plus it's the only game I where I have any vague ideas of the rules, other than rugby. But who could honestly imagine a Jigen look-alike in rugby shorts…? Sorry if that imagery was a little much for anyone, hee hee… I'm gonna go shudder for a solid hour….

_'When I think of all the times I tried so hard to leave her,  
She will turn to me and start to cry,  
And she promises the earth to me and I believe her,  
After all this time, I don't know why. '_

—The Beatles, _'Girl'_

Chapter Three

A Few Moments Later: Sara

"In here!" Fuji shouted quickly, taking a hard left and bounding down another darkened hall with Heiji in tow. Leo and Max soon followed, Leo stumbling along slightly, for he was not used to the Chinese-style shoes that Ally wore. He tripped once, and Max quickly caught him, and they continued down the musty hall.

"Hey, you three run for it, I've got an idea!" Fuji shouted to the men quickly.

"What about you!?" asked Heiji.

"Hey, don't worry about me, I've gotten out of worse spots!" Fuji said with a confident smile. She stopped, and pulled a small bulb out of her jacket, and stood glaring menacingly in front of the guards. Leo went to go grab her, but Max forced him along down the hall with Heiji. There was a brilliant explosion, and the three sped up the pace, in order to avoid the flames. They ended up ducking into a hall, and Leo was first to run back out when the flames died down.

"Fuji!" Leo yelled frantically, "Fujiko!? Where are you?!"

"Hey, LeBlanc," Max called Leo over, and kicked at his finding. A singed blue denim jacket.

"Oh, no…. No…" Leo shook his head, and fell down at his knees in front of the jacket, which lay amongst where the guards had stood, "Fuji…"

"I… I don't believe it…" Heiji said in a small breath of shock.

Max gulped dryly, and approached Leo, placing a hand on LeBlanc's shoulder, "She, um… Died doing what she loved most…"

"Hey, um, could I get a hand here, guys?" the three heard in a weak chuckle.

"Huh?" Max looked upward, and fell to the ground as Fuji dropped herself down from the hidden tunnel above the three she had ducked into.

"Thanks, Zenigata!" Fuji said with a wide smile.

"Do you have any idea what you're digging your high heel into?" a pained Max inquired.

"Whoops, hee hee… Sorry…." Fuji chuckled lightly, and rose, only to immediately be pulled into Leo's hold.

"I thought you were dead! Oh my God, I was so scared you were gone!" Leo admitted as he embraced her tightly.

"Pfh! If I had a quarter for every time I had a gaggle of guys tried to chase me down… I'd have a friggin' piggy bank the size of Zenigata's ego!" Fuji laughed.

"Watch it," Max snapped as he rose and dusted himself off.

"Here," Heiji stepped forward, and removed his light blue short-sleeved over shirt, and draped it over Fuji's shoulders. "What's a Lupin without a jacket?"

"Colder, for one thing," Fuji admitted. "Hrm… I wonder…" she looked upward at the tunnel she had hidden in once again, and looked back at the three men.

"What's up, Fuji?" Heiji inquired.

"How good are you boys at climbing?" Fuji asked with a smirk.

"….Why?" asked Leo suspiciously.

"Well, that tunnel just can't lead to nowhere, now can it?" Fuji smirked, "LeBlanc, you're the tallest, give me a lift."

"Wha—Hey, watch it!" Leo grumbled as Fuji climbed atop his shoulders and gripped onto a metal rung in the tunnel.

"Hey, I think there's a light up here!" Fuji called, "Come on, guys!"

"You next, Heiji," Leo lifted Ishikawa up, and then Max. Max reached downward and helped Leo up, and the four ascended up the old metal rungs, to an unknown destination.

"If either of you two look up my sister's skirt, I'll kill you," Leo said to Heiji and Max sternly.

"He'll do it, too. He disconnected the brakes on my first boyfriend's car," Fuji added.

"He wasn't any good for you, Fuji," Leo reminded her.

"Yeah, and the day I find a boyfriend you actually like is the day I become convinced you're still straight…" Fuji snorted.

"I'm straight!" Leo snapped.

"Max, hearing that each time must be like a little knife in your heart…." Fuji said with a small chuckle, "Ouch! I just hit the roof with my head!"

"Good to know you didn't hurt anything…" Max mumbled.

"Ha ha…" Fuji looked back at Zenigata and stuck out her tongue in response.

"Okay, can we please get out of here? Being stuck here with you guys in a tight space isn't exactly my idea of fun…" Heiji sighed.

"Okay, gotcha…" Fuji hit the ceiling, and the door rose only slightly. She continued to hit it with her full strength, but to no avail.

"I'm coming up there," Max grumbled. "If it's true, and I am as crazy as my dad, this ought to work…"

"Ow, hey!" Heiji snapped as Max climbed upward, and squeezed past him, "God… I feel like I should report you for sexual assault after that!"

"Good luck with that," Max laughed as he continued upward, and became eye-level with Fuji. "No one would believe you; everyone in that office knows I haven't gotten any in months."

"Zenigata, I know I've had dreams about being alone with you in a tight little dark space, but not with my brother watching!" Fuji chuckled.

"Shut up and cover your ears," Max ordered.

"Should I even ask?" Heiji sighed.

"I've learned not to. It's better just to listen to him," Leo added tiredly, complying and covering his ears.

"Woah, what the _hell _was that!?" Fuji yelped.

"Relax, that was just my gun…" Max sighed.

"Jeeze…. For a second there I thought I was going to have to ask you why you've had such bad luck dating," Fuji responded. "…Wait, gun!? Zenigata, what are you going to do with a gun!?"

"Cover your ears, Lupin!" Max repeated, aiming for the door.

"Oh God… He's friggin' nuts…" Fuji muttered to herself as she ducked her head down and covered her ears. Max fired, sending both his ears and the tunnel ringing and sending the lock upon the door falling, straight onto Fuji's head.

"Damn it! Would things quit falling upon my skull!?" Fuji demanded angrily.

"Here, push with me," Max ordered, and both he and Fuji pushed upward upon the trap door. Max was the first to pull himself out, and he then helped Fuji. She accidentally fell upon Zenigata, and Heiji shot a quick glare at his uncle as he worked his way out. Leo was the last out, and he adjusted his glasses to get a better look at their surroundings. It did not take long for him to realize he and the others were in a bathroom.

Ally, who had been relaxing calmly in the tub of his bathroom, stared in quiet surprise as he looked at the four.

"Hey, got room in there for one more, Ally? That place is a freakin' crap hole down there…" Fuji said in a pant. "I feel like a dishrag in a Waffle House…"

Later:

"So we think we could get out through there," Fuji ended as she sat in her chamber along with the rest of the group and the inspectors. Ally had dressed himself in a bathrobe, and was still damp from the shower. Yukiko and Toshiro had exhausted their ideas for an escape, and had settled upon playing card games until Fuji called upon them. Ryo had nearly beheaded a guard who went to park her vehicle, and had to be led back to her room at gunpoint after she gave him a black eye for accidentally ripping a seat cushion. Odori had also tried to escape, but was led back to her room as well, numerous times. She was now exhausted, as she was often in her condition.

"Through the tunnels? Yeah, or we could always blow up something, and use that as a diversion…" said Yukiko thoughtfully.

"With what explosives?" Fuji retorted. "Point blank, they've got our supplies, and we're having to rely on our minds."

"So we're screwed," Ally concluded.

"Exactly. I, I mean, no, no we're not! I'll think of something, I always do!" Fuji said with a smile. She then turned to Heiji and Ryo, "You guys got any ideas on what the hell we can do?"

"I think you're getting what you deserve for being greedy," Ryo answered, folding her arms. "You put yourself in a situation that you wouldn't admit is too big for you to handle because you're too proud…."

"But you're going to help me, right?"

"Of course…" Ryo sighed, "Why I bother, though, I still don't know!" she threw her arms up in defeat, and then rose, "I'm going to go grab some shut up… They don't have cable here, so I'm missing _Gunsmoke_, which is making me more irritable than usual…"

"I'm going to go put on pants… It's freezing in here," Ally muttered.

"I've got to eat.... I'm hungry… The people here are bastards, but I'll be damned if they don't make the best beef jerky and radish sandwiches on the planet…" Odori admitted.

"Please don't tell me you really eat that, Dori," Heiji shuddered.

"It's not my fault that this baby has weird tastes… Last night I found myself eating banana cream pie… And I detest junk food," Odori shuddered.

"I'm gonna go get drunk…" Yukiko sighed.

"It Friday already? Guess I'll come too, then," Toshiro added, standing and walking out with her.

"I've got to do some computer repairs. Good luck, Fuji," Heiji patted her on the shoulder and went to walk out of the room.

"Hey, Heiji-chan, what about your shirt?" Fuji asked.

"You keep it for now," Heiji answered with a small smile, leaving her with the inspectors.

"Well, you two going, too?" Fuji inquired.

"I'm going to catch some sleep," Leo yawned. "Max, I'll meet you in our room…"

"We have a room?" Max asked, turning his head in Leo's direction.

"I'll leave my tie on the door so you don't get lost… G'night, guys," Leo yawned, stretched, and walked out of Fuji's room, closing the door behind himself.

"Well, just us, Zenigata! I remember last time we were alone in a castle, the results were a disaster!" Fuji whooped, and pushed Zenigata on the shoulder playfully. "You're too uptight, Zeni-chan! You need to learn how to relax!"

"Hm. All of this stress is due to you, you know," Max snapped. "You're the one who puts me through hell!"

"Jeeze… I'm just a scapegoat for your problems, aren't I, Zenigata?" Fuji sighed, "You know what, one of these days you're going to retire, look back, and have nothing to blame your problems on anymore! And you'll probably blame me for that, too! I'm not the reason you're such a luckless, crazy, obsessive jerk, you know!"

"Better that then a whiny, whorish, annoying bitch," Max grumbled.

"Why do you settle for so little in life, Max?" Fuji asked after a pause, "Don't you ever have fun anymore? You know, I did some research on you, Zenigata, and I asked around. You were quite the hell-raiser… Then your dad kicked your ass once and it was all over… You really are a coward, and that's sad…"

Max glared at her, and grumbled, "I don't have to take this crap, especially from you!"

"You didn't even notice that's the first time I've ever called you by your first name," said Fuji, apparently bemused. "You just jump ahead of so much… You ever think of stopping to smell the roses, Zenigata?" She reached toward Max, and he jerked back. Fuji sighed heavily, and leaned in again, this time removing his glasses and setting them upon a nearby table, "You could do a lot better than you're doing."

"What are you trying to pull?" Zenigata asked suspiciously.

"Sit down, shut up, and just go with something for once," Fuji ordered sternly.

"Huh?" Max frowned, "What are you talking about? Give me back my glasses, I'm going to—"

"Tell him already, Zenigata!" Fuji snapped.

"Tell him? Who? Tell him what?" Max asked lividly, "You're speaking in friggin' rhyme…"

Fuji smirked knowingly, "You'll figure it out… Here, take your damn glasses… But if I were you, I'd put those contacts you were wearing back in… Those glasses hide a lot of your face, you have to admit."

"I like them to," Max snapped, took his glasses, and stormed out of the room, closing the door once again.

"I'm gonna have to do something drastic soon, before those two kill each other… Mommy never liked her little girl to play with bows and arrows, but Fuji may very well end up playing Cupid to a couple of dumb-asses… He he he he… This is gonna be fun! I _love _playing with sharp things!"

"Your sister's a freak and a perv," Max announced to Leo as he walked into their room.

Leo looked up from his book, and stared at Max a few moments quietly, "Didn't take a rocket scientist to figure that one. What'd she try to do now, grope you again?"

"Not this time around," Max replied, seating himself at a nearby desk and removing his shoes.

"Hey, apparently that Von Idle lady, man, whatever the hell it is, brought our bags from the Harley up… I checked them for any tracking devices or anything poisonous, and we're okay… I think she just likes playing with people."

"She and Fuji ought to have a very nice life together, then," Max concluded. He pulled over one of the bags on the desk and began to shuffle through it. He pulled out a pair of pajamas and strangely enough a pair of boxer shorts. They were yellow, and the pattern upon them was one of little orange ducks. "What the bloody—"

"I don't judge you, Zenigata, so don't judge me," Leo said, quickly cutting Max off.

"No wonder you don't get any action," Max said to himself, rising and walking into the bathroom. "Hey, LeBlanc, can I ask you a question?"

"You just did," Leo replied.

"Are you tired tonight, because you're awfully cranky," Max said with a pause.

"I usually get a little irritated when there have been attempts made upon my life," Leo answered. "What's your question, Max?"

"Well, that um… That was just so Fuji would lose the bet, right?" Max asked nervously.

"Yeah…. Why?"

"I thought so."

Leo closed his book, and looked over at the couch, which was looking better and better as their uncomfortable conversation continued, "Hey, maybe one of us should stay with Fuji tonight."

"It'd have to do you; I'm afraid of what'd she do to me in my sleep," Max shuddered.

"Hey, she never shaved your head!" snapped Leo.

"….She shaved your head?"

"Yeah!"

"Well, what'd you do to her?"

"I filled her bed with lobsters," Leo replied with a shrug, as if this were the only natural way to respond to the situation. Max gaped a moment, but shook his head, and continued to prepare for bed. He stared in the mirror a few moments, and slowly removed his glasses, and studied his reflection a little before taking out a contact case from his pocket and putting the glasses away their respective case.

He walked back out, and found Leo already asleep on the bed, "Well, that didn't take long… You must be beat, LeBlanc. He switched off one of the old lights, and also crawled into the bed. He looked over at Leo, shifted his eyes and rolled to the side away from Leo, "Okay… It's just Leo… Your friend, Leo… Pretend he's your brother, and you'll be okay…" Max growled and ducked his head under his pillow after a few restless moves, "Damn it, why couldn't I have had a brother!?"

Max, after a few more minutes' worth of frustration, rose, and walked out of the room, throwing on slippers and a bathrobe before his departure. He was surprised to see Ryo in the hallway, in her nightgown, smoking a cigarette and looking off distantly as she usually did.

"Zenigata…. What are you doing out and about this time of night?" Ryo asked, "Cigarette?"

"Yeah… Thanks," Max nodded, took the cigarette, and allowed Ryo to light it for him.

"Where's your other half?" Ryo asked teasingly.

"Asleep," Max answered, taking a drag of his cigarette.

"Does he still have that nightmare?"

"Not as much," Max admitted, shaking his head. "He's actually a pretty sound sleeper, now… He was snoring when I left him…"

"He always was before the accident," Ryo said with a small snort.

"Oh," Max looked downward at the ground, and coughed lightly. He had to find a way to escape, somehow. Not so much the palace, now, but the presence of Ryo. He never realized exactly how old her eyes were, or how ancient she seemed when she talked. She had always given him the creeps, he admitted.

Ryo looked at him sideways, and smiled, "We always seemed to understand each other, you know… I must admit, sometimes I'm really jealous of you, Max… Hell, I'll go as far to say I've thought about assassinating you a few times!"

"What!?" Max shrieked.

Ryo shrugged, "It was just a passing thought. My point is that you're one lucky bastard, Zenigata."

"Um… I'll keep that in mind… I'm gonna go now…"

"Orange duck," said Ryo as Max turned to leave.

"Huh?" Max turned back to her, and frowned.

"Those were his first words… I figured you could use it against him as blackmail someday," Ryo said with a smirk.

"Heh… Anything else I should know?"

"Never take him to New Orleans," Ryo added with a shake of the head. "He loves the Bourbon there for some reason, and I can't remember a time when I went with him where I didn't end up picking him up off of the concrete and driving him home, all while he ranted on and claimed he was Oprah Winfrey."

Max smirked, "Thanks, I'll keep that in mind…" Ryo watched as he left, and she gave another discontented sigh.

That Morning:

"Hm?" Yukiko raised her head as she heard a rapping upon the glass window in her and Toshiro's room, and she rose, and walked over to the window. It was the same pigeon, the one with paperclip. "Son of a bitch… I friggin' hate birds…" she grumbled, but then stopped as she noticed the paper tied securely about its foot missing, "Huh…Hey, Toshiro, wake up… Wake up…"

"Huh? It's not even seven yet, Yukiko," said Toshiro with a yawn.

"Someone got our message!" said Yukiko excitedly.

"Let's hope it's the right person…" Toshiro rose from bed, and walked over to the window. He opened it, letting the chilled air in along with the bird. Yukiko shivered, and walked back over to the bed, and hid under the thick comforter as Toshiro undid the paperclip marking from the bird and set it free once more.

"Well, that's taken care of," Yukiko yawned, and settled back down to sleep. Someone's staring soon stirred her from her light sleep, however, and she looked up at Toshiro. "I can't sleep with people staring at me…"

"Hm… Sorry, I just zoned out," said Toshiro with a shake of the head.

"Yeah, considering the airhead you are, I'm not very surprised," Yukiko chuckled. "Get to sleep, man! Busy day tomorrow if we're going to get our asses out of here!"

Toshiro nodded, and followed Yukiko's advice, crawling into the large old bed. He prodded her on the shoulder, and Yukiko turned around, and looked at him questioningly and tiredly. Toshiro gave a hopeful smile, and Yukiko returned this with a frown of disbelief.

"Guess not, huh?" he sighed.

"What, here!?" Yukiko choked, "You've got to seriously be kidding!"

"What? It's been months, Yukiko!" Toshiro snapped, sitting up in the bed, "If something's wrong, let me know what it is!"

"Fine, you wanna know what's wrong? I think this is all a mistake!" Yukiko answered in growl.

"You're the one who told me you loved me!"

"Only after you hounded my ass for over a year!"

Toshiro sighed, and rose from the bed, "Are you trying to tell me you want to go back to being friends?"

"We didn't argue this much as friends," Yukiko reminded him quietly.

"I'm not the one with commitment problems…"

"Commitment problems!? I—"

"You can't commit to do _anything _outside of work."

"Well, I didn't realize you were under the thought that I was so socially inept," Yukiko said darkly.

"I don't think that, Yuki, I just think you need to learn to grow up!" Toshiro responded, "I'm surprised you didn't pack your bags when you found out you could be pregnant!"

"…I did…" Yukiko nodded and replied in a quiet choke, "I… I just don't know what the hell to do a lot of times, okay!? I don't know how to manage relationships, I'll admit! And my track record isn't exactly spectacular, either…"

"Well, I…." Toshiro closed his eyes and sighed, "If you want to go back to friends, fine. I'll love you no matter what you decide, Yukiko, you know that. If you need help, I'll help. Just tell me what to do!"

Yukiko gave a weak smile, "I don't think you need any improvement… It's me, I'll admit it… It's me… I just… I kinda suck at this stuff…. I never paid attention to boys when I was little—"

"Like hell," snorted Toshiro. "If you only had any idea how many boys I beat up over the years on your account…"

"…Should I be flattered?"

"Highly," Toshiro responded. "I got my ass handed to me on your accord a few times too, after all…"

"Heh heh…. I remember," Yukiko chuckled.

"Hey, quiet," Toshiro whispered. "Do you hear that?"

Yukiko paused, "Yeah…. Yeah I do…"

"Check it out?" Toshiro suggested.

"You bet," Toshiro nodded, and rose from the bed. Yukiko soon followed, grabbing onto her gun. Toshiro grabbed a hold of his two swords, and both exited the room, and found Fuji fighting the hallway with a guard.

"No way I'm wearing that!" Fuji shouted angrily, "You're outta your friggin' mind!"

"But the wedding's tomorrow," said the guard firmly.

"Yeah, well Von Idle can take that damn wedding dress and stick it—"

"What's going on here?" Toshiro demanded. The guard was about to direct a snide remark, but then he noticed that the person who had directed this at him was about two feet taller, and more armed. And next to him stood a vicious-looking woman with a gun, who looked for any excuse to shoot.

"Toshiro and Yuki! Oh thank God!" Fuji sighed in relief, "This creep is telling me I'm getting married tomorrow!"

"What!? Tomorrow?" Yukiko gulped.

"You get away from her before you'll be able to count all of your fingers on one hand!" Toshiro snapped. The guard calmly threw the dress at Fuji, and grumbled as he exited down the hall.

"How much you want to bet he only spared us now because they're going to kill us later?" Yukiko asked darkly.

"This lady's relentless!" Fuji moaned unhappily, putting a hand to her forehead.

"Well, that's okay, you've got an idea, right?" Yukiko said. There was a pause, and Yukiko grew a little nervous at this silence, "Right, Fuji?"

"I don't have a single clue," Fuji admitted after a pause, "I guess I'm rusty from the convent…"

"Well, you called us together, so you must have some idea!"

"Yeah, and the idea was for you guys to come up with the idea," Fuji said meekly.

Toshiro faltered in his speech as he addressed Fuji, "You gathered us all to go to a heavily guarded fortress where you knew there would be tight security?"

"Hey, it sounds really bad when you put it that way!" Fuji shouted in defense.

"Wonder why…" Yukiko mumbled. "Perhaps because it was stupid friggin' idea!?"

"You know, you don't have to shout…" sighed Fuji heavily.

"Let's hope we picked one smart bird…" Toshiro said to Yukiko.

"Hey, you're forgetting we've got someone else in the game," all three looked down the hall, and saw Odori standing her doorway, digging into a bag of potato chips.

"….I thought you hated junk food…" said Toshiro with confusion.

"Yes, but he loves it," answered Odori, pointing down to her stomach. "Fuji, you have a brother who loves you. I suggest you go suck up to him."

"Ohhhhh…. I can't!" Fuji moaned, holding a hand over her head.

"Lupin," Fuji swung her head about, and looked into horror at Von Idle, who was standing at the stairway. "We need to talk…"

Fuji looked back at Odori pleadingly, "Dori, get Leo to help… I don't care what you have to do—Whore out Zenigata, for all I care! Just help me!"

"Lupin," Von Idle repeated. Fuji rolled her eyes and trudged over to Von Idle. "I want to speak with you a little…"

"Yeah, yeah, sure," Fuji grumbled.

"Huh," Toshiro tilted his head to one side.

"What?" Yukiko asked.

"It just hit me… She looks like the blonde woman in _Hellsing_…"

"….You watch anime?"

"Just a little…" Toshiro looked downward, "It was on cable! Give me a damn break already!"

Meanwhile, Von Idle led Fuji down the stairway, out of the palace, and into the gardens. "You shouldn't be afraid of the snipers… They won't shoot unless you run…" said Von Idle reassuringly.

"That's friggin' comforting…" grumbled Fuji.

"I would think you'd be more happy… You are going to be co-ruler, after all," Von Idle said with a smile.

"Listen, Lady, I hate to break it to you, but I'm not exactly one for commitment. No offense, but I'm happy being the Princess of Thieves!"

"Why be a princess when you could be a queen?"

"Huh?"

"Come with me… I'm going to show you something that may very well sway your emotions," said Von Idle with a small smirk.

"Hey, while we're talking, could I ask you what the hell all of the guards chasing my ass were for?" asked Fuji.

"Just a precaution…"

"I thought they were going to kill me."

"Well, now you know to be wiser when attempting an escape," responded Von Idle quickly. Fuji watched in wonder as Von Idle stopped in front of a mausoleum and pulled back one of the arms on the angel statue which protected it. She led Fuji down another dark stairwell, and turned on a light as they reached the bottom. Fuji gasped in shock at what she saw. Treasures were crammed throughout the entire room—Wine, paintings, jewelry—Anything she could have possibly imagined was stuffed in the large room.

"Your great-grandfather and mine were good partners," Von Idle explained. "They stole all of this… This is our legacy…"

"Wow…" Fuji spun around back to Von Idle. "You mean some of this belongs to me, too? I had this and didn't even know about it!? Holy crap! How could I possible miss that!?"

"Hrm… Well, it can all be yours, Fujiko," said Von Idle with a smirk.

"I… I'm not sure… I mean, Baroness, I'm sure you're nice… Crazy as hell, but nice!" said Fuji reassuringly, "I'm just not really into that sort of stuff. You dig?"

"Sara," said Von Idle. "My name is Sara… I'd like it if you'd call me that."

"Um, well, Sara, I, um…" Fuji looked at 'Sara', and then back at the large piles of treasures.

Later:

"You're going to WHAT!?" Leo shrieked at the very top of his lungs. Fuji, who was sitting up straight in a seat in LeBlanc's room, shuddered at Leo's shrill tone.

"Well, you know, that weather here's great!" chuckled Fuji in quick response.

"You're not going to go through with this, Fujiko! I forbid you!" shouted Leo.

"What?" Fuji hissed, "You listen to me, and you listen good, Inspector LeBlanc—No one leads Lupin the Fourth around on a short leash!"

"You're being stupid, Fuji!" snapped Leo angrily. "And I'm not talking to you as an inspector, but as a brother! You think you're going to use her, but she's going to turn around and use you! I know these people! They're part of the reason I got out of the business!"

"Well, I am one of those people, and it's time you realized it," snapped Fuji.

"You're impossible," Leo slapped his forehead in frustration. "There's no evidence that great-grandpa was ever here… I'm telling you, Von Idle's using you for something, but you aren't listening to me!"

"You need to stop policing me around, Ari," said Fuji darkly.

"I'm a police officer, Fuji—It's my job," replied Leo quickly.

"Listen, I've got some stuff to work out. I'll see you later," said Fuji, rising from her chair.

"I doubt it," Leo said with a shake of the head. "I'm going to find a way to get out of here…. I think I'm going to kill you if I stay any longer…" Leo stormed out of his large bedroom, slamming the door as he left.

"Fine, be that way!" Fuji snapped, "Immature little brat…" She looked towards an open window that drew some of her attention, and became even more attracted by a noise outside.

She rose, and looked out of the window, and nearly gaped at what she saw. Armed soldiers—A fleet of them.

"How in the hell…." she gaped in shock.

"Baroness Sara Von Idle—Open up! We have reason to believe you're holding the Lupin the Fourth gang in asylum! If you don't open these doors, we will!" shouted an officer.


	4. Think of Me

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Lupin III, but I do own a copy of _When Harry Met Sally_, which I will watch at least seven times on Valentine's Day…

Hiiii! Hope you didn't miss me!

Sorry this update's taken a while, as well, but someone's come down with a flu bug, it seems… A flu bug that's totally kicked their ass in recent days… I'm feeling much more up to par now, however, and that is why this newest chapter is now coming to you all, which I was able to compile while preparing for 'Paul Day' (Superbowl Sunday—Paul freakin' McCartney!) Well, as always, please enjoy, and please review and give your critiques and opinions!

Fun Fact of Boredom: In honor of Valentine's Day…. The most popular couple in this fanfic is Yukiko and Toshiro, followed by Max and Leo, Ally and Carmen, Heiji and Fuji, Ari and Ryo, and Odori and Musashi. Some of the least favorite are Toshiro and Julia and Leo and Cecilia.

_'Sweet Loretta Martin thought she was a woman  
But she was another man  
All the girls around her say she's got it coming  
But she gets it while she can.  
Get back, get back.  
Get back to where you once belonged  
Get back, get back,'_

—The Beatles, _'Get Back'_

Chapter Four

A Little While Later: Think of Me

"Great! Reinforcements!" said Toshiro happily as he looked out the window, "Yukiko, look!"

"All right!" Yukiko smiled widely.

"You two did this?" they both looked back and saw Fuji standing in the doorway.

"Yeah!" Toshiro answered, but as he viewed Fuji's expression, he quickly regretted taking part in the action.

"How'd you do it?" Fuji inquired.

"I wrote it on a letter, and we tied it to a bird," responded Yukiko.

"That's great…." Fuji muttered, "Thank you both for getting all of our asses in hot water, you friggin' morons!" she added in a shout. "Do you have any idea what they're going to do? They're going to friggin' slaughter us along with Sara!"

"Who's Sara?" asked Toshiro after a brief pause.

"It… It doesn't matter," Fuji turned away in disgust. "We've got to get out of here…"

"Lupin," Sara Von Idle approached the same doorway which Fuji had stood in only moments before, "what have you done?"

"It wasn't me," said Fuji with a shake of the head.

"They're going to kill us all…" said Sara as she looked out the window, "You've got to get out of here…"

"Yeah, we—Wait, me?" Fuji looked at Von Idle questioningly.

"Someone must be there to deal with these pests," said Von Idle with obvious contempt for the soldiers.

"They'll kill you!" Fuji shouted.

Sara shrugged, "But I'll die as I've always wished…"

"Like a pig-headed idiot?"

"No; saving a beautiful damsel in distress…. I suppose I'm just an old romantic in that sense," she smiled wryly and closed her eyes in thought. "You better get out of here… Go through the tunnels… I'll give you a map. You'll be able to drive through the tunnels you'll be going through. Gather your team—Hurry, there isn't much time to waste!"

"Wait, I—" Fuji reached outward to grab hold of Sara, but the baroness vanished before Fuji could talk some sense into her, "Dammit…"

"What now?" Yukiko asked Fuji.

Fuji stared at the door a few moments, and then looked back at Yukiko and Toshiro, "Pack up… We've movin' out…"

It wasn't long before the group had gathered and gone down the tunnels. Ryo was at the wheel of the Alfa Romeo, Leo was at the wheel of the police cruiser, and Toshiro was at the handles of his Vespa.

"Listen, I talked to Leo, and you can ride in his and Zenigata's cruiser… It's all set," said Fuji as she looked upward at Von Idle, who stood at the side of their getaway vehicle.

"I told you before, I'm not going," said Sara flatly.

"There's like a million of them! You're committing suicide!" snapped Fuji.

Von Idle smirked, reached downward, and grabbed onto Fuji's hand. She kissed it, and smiled at Fuji, "You take care now, Princess of Thieves."

"Baroness, the soldiers have made their way into the tunnels!" a frantic guard announced to Von Idle.

"Get going!" shouted Sara.

"Don't needa tell me twice," Ryo mumbled.

"Fujiko, take this, please," Sara tossed Fuji a small package, and moments later Ryo stepped upon the gas, and the Vespa and cruiser soon followed afterward down the long tunnels.

Sara smiled as she turned back to the soldiers, and she drew her sword and shouted, "Come on, you bastards, you want to fight? I'll give you one to remember!" And then she vanished into the mass of soldiers.

Meanwhile, the three vehicles swerved and out through the tunnels, Ryo leading the way. They all came out to a mountainside, where Ryo stopped her vehicle. Toshiro and Leo soon followed, and all looked out at the masses of soldiers.

"We really screwed that up…" Toshiro gulped dryly.

"Somehow, I think she likes the battles," Ryo admitted.

"Don't feel bad… I'm the one who called," Leo said suddenly.

"How the hell did you do that?" Fuji yelped.

"I bribed one of the guards," Leo smiled wryly. "You ought to know better than anyone that everyone's got a price attached to them, Fujiko."

Fuji paused, "I think this is the part where you tell me I'm under arrest, Officer LeBlanc."

"You've already sealed your fate to this kind of a life… I'm starting to wonder if I should bother," said Leo tiredly. "Fuji, I'm tired… I don't want to talk about this… I probably just led someone else to their death…"

"It'd be a first," Fuji snapped. She gasped as she realized what she said, and Leo shot his head up questioningly. Fuji turned away from Leo, and looked downward at the ground.

"Ryo, start the car…" Fuji ordered.

"Yeah," Ryo nodded.

"Fuji, what'd you mean?" Leo asked with confusion, "Fuji, what'd you mean?" he shouted, but it was too later; Fuji and the others were now zooming down the road.

"You want to go after them?" asked Max.

"Well, we're not on payroll for nothing…" Leo responded with a sigh. He hopped back into his vehicle, and the Leo began his usual chase of his old friends. He could not help but wonder, however, what exactly Fuji had meant.

Fuji was giving a blank look at the package which now laid on her lap. She wondered what it was, but still she didn't touch the package.

"Well, this was officially a bust…" Ally muttered tiredly, "Some story I'm gonna have for Carmen… No treasure, almost dead, and you, Heiji, Max and Ari walking in on me in the bathroom… I haven't had anything this depressing happen to me since the hockey lockout."

"Ally, I've got to ask another favor of you…" Fuji said suddenly.

"What?" Ally choked, "But you promised—"

"Yeah, I know, but this is important…" Fuji responded.

"What's the gig, Fuji? I'm in no matter what, you know that," Ryo replied.

"Ari might not have killed anyone after all," Fuji answered after a pause. She paid little attention to Ryo's stunned expression, but instead now went to unwrapping the package. It was a photograph of the original Arséne Lupin along with the first Baron Von Idol, along with a note. Fuji opened the note, and skimmed through it, and a small smile came upon her face.

"Yeah… You too, Sara," she said quietly to herself.

One Week Later, Paris, France:

"I can't believe we went all the way from Germany to Madagascar for crap…" Max grumbled as he and Leo trudged up the eight flights of stairs to Leo's apartment.

"Well, at least the weather was nice…" Leo shrugged, "And no one tried to kill us there, either!" He placed the key in the doorway, and abruptly stopped to a halt.

"What's wrong?" Max whispered.

"Someone's… Cooking…" Leo answered in a whisper. Both quietly drew out their guns, and Leo slowly opened their door, and both slid through as small a crack as possible, and crept trough the living room.

"Freeze! Police!" Max shouted.

"Arrêtet! Les inspecteurs d'Interpol!" shouted Leo.

Dakota let out a scream of surprise, and dropped the bowl of pancake batter which she held in her hands. She glared at the two severely as she realized who it was, and went to go fetch a mop while the two puzzled inspectors stood stunned in position.

"Dakota?" Leo gulped in surprise, "What are you…"

"I'm on vacation…" Dakota explained as she retrieved a mop from the closet, "I was trying to surprise you idiots…"

"How'd you know when we were getting back?" Max demanded.

"Blog," Dakota shrugged. "I made coffee already, guys… And omelets… Zenigata, I don't know how kosher you go, so yours is vegetarian… No meat and dairy together, and no pork, right? There's also that thing about no shellfish, but if I'm not mistaken, there's some frozen shrimp in the freezer…"

"How'd you know what kosher is?" Max inquired as he put away his gun.

"I called your mom to find out. She's on speed dial," Dakota answered. "She said she wasn't sure, either, but that you hated dairy products regardless…."

"Wait, Dakota, your Dad let you stay here with us?" Leo asked questioningly, bending down to become eye-level with the young girl.

"Um… Well… Not really, per se…" Dakota looked off innocently.

"You forged the tickets, didn't you, you little urchin?" Max concluded.

"More like corrected the changes my dad made…" Dakota responded.

"So, you're a forger…" Max smirked, "This means we could arrest you…"

"Not if I destroyed all evidence and knew my dad would lie for me," Dakota answered, sticking her tongue out at Max in response.

"You've got to go home," Leo said quickly. "You can't stay here, Dakota. It's not safe, and we can't leave you alone…"

"Well, how long are you two staying?" Dakota inquired.

"Too long…" Max replied with the twitch of a smile.

"I knew you'd be happy to see me, Zenigata…" Dakota sighed, "And after I clean out your guys' apartment…"

Max looked about the apartment and sure enough the household was extremely clean. "Well, um… Good job…"

"I even cleaned your room…" Dakota smiled, "Hey, Leo, did you know Max has a crush on Jude Law? He has posters!"

"You little—"

"Both of you shut up! I'm on the phone!" shouted Leo angrily. Both shot daggers at one another, and stood in a silent showdown until a very serious-looking Leo called Max out.

He led Zenigata into his bedroom, and closed and locked the door behind him, "Um… Wow…."

"What's the problem, LeBlanc?" asked Max worriedly.

"Um… I got in touch with Daniel's lawyer…" Leo responded after a few moments' silence.

"And? Oh, no, he's not in jail, is he?" Max asked with horror.

"No…"

"Oh thank G-d…."

"They don't know where Daniel is…" Leo answered.

"What?" Max choked, "What about his family?"

"None of them talk to him or her," shrugged Leo.

"What do we do with her, then?" asked Max worriedly.

"Well, her mom's still in a coma… And her dad's missing… And none of her family wants her…"

"So we're sending her back, right?" Max concluded cheerily.

"What? Zenigata, no!" snapped Leo, "She's staying with us!"

"What?" Max moaned, "Leo, no! You saw her before—She can take care of herself just fine!"

"She can't live on her own, Zenigata… We don't go off for three more days, by that time we'll have figured out what to do with her."

"Couldn't she stay with your parents?" Max asked.

"Nah—Dad took Mom on a cruise for Valentine's Day…"

"Who's wearing the dress?"

"Don't make me beat you, Zenigata, because I will," snapped Leo in response quickly.

"Well, you're on your own tonight, LeBlanc… I have important errands to run…"

"What? You didn't mention anything before…" Leo frowned in confusion.

"Well, I…"

"What's the errand, Max?" asked Leo suspiciously.

"I… Um…"

"You've got a date!" Leo pointed a finger accusingly at Max. "Who's it with, Zenigata?"

"I never said anything about a date!"

"Oh, you didn't have to—You've got that face…" sighed Leo tiredly.

"And which face would that be?" asked Max angrily.

Leo gasped, "It's with that Chinese guy, isn't it? I knew it was weird when he approached you today after we got to the offices!"

"I'll cancel…" Max sighed grimly. "But I'm doing this for you, not that little brat out there!"

"I can hear you!" snapped Dakota from the other side of the door.

"What'd your parents tell you about eavesdropping, you little brat?" growled Max as he swung open the door wide and glared down at Dakota.

Dakota sneered at Zenigata, "How could you just cheat on Leo like that? And how could you let him walk all over you, Leo! You don't have to be his bitch!"

"I've about had it with you…" Max gritted his teeth together and ground them in rage.

Leo shook his head, "I've got to go and study…. I'm learning Hindi right now, so I'll need a few hours to myself…"

"What? You're leaving me alone with _that_?" Max shouted, pointing at Dakota.

Leo smiled and picked up a thick book as he exited the room, "I'm going to be researching Indian mythology… Don't call me unless you're both bleeding to death."

"That little creep…." said Max, balling his fists and gritting his teeth, "I hope he gets the paper-cut from hell…"

"Dating intellectuals must be hard on you, Zenigata…." Dakota said with a tone of sympathy.

"We're not dating…" Max replied, snapping his head in Dakota's direction.

"Oh, sucks to be you then, huh?" Dakota said with a shrug, "I'm gonna go watch cartoons in French…"

"Whatever… Just don't set the damn apartment on fire…" Max muttered absently.

Leo, meanwhile, had gone into the laundry room to study, shutting the door behind him and locking it. He sat at the small table with the telephone at his side and a book opened. He scrawled Hindi letters upon a sheet of paper, looked over his handiwork, and compared it to the illustrations, "I suck at this… What the hell's the matter with me today?" The phone rang, and Leo quickly picked it up, "Allo? L'apartement de M. Zenigata et M. LeBlanc… C'est Léo…

"I know who it is," Leo gasped at the sound of the voice.

"Ryoko? Where are you?" asked Leo, turning away from his books and leaning upon his table.

"I'm outside of your apartment. Come on out."

"But, I… If I come out there, it's with handcuffs…"

"Ha ha…" Ryo said dully, "Just get out here already…"

Leo hung up his phone, and opened the door to the laundry room. He was quick to avoid Dakota and Max as he made his way to the front door, and opened it, and sure enough, saw Ryo standing in front of him.

"Are you here with anyone else?" Leo asked suspiciously as he closed the door behind himself and looked left and right.

"Nice trick," Ryo smirked. "I came here alone, at my own will, without anyone coming along, much less knowing, where I am."

"Why are you here, Ryo?" asked Leo tiredly.

"Here," Ryo removed a small box from her purse and handed it to Leo. "You know there Japanese custom—Girl gives boy chocolate on Valentine's Day."

"Are these the obligatory chocolates or the chocolates for someone you like?" Leo asked questioningly as he took the box and shook it.

"Hm… Well, if they don't make you gag, I suppose they're for a person I like," Ryo answered with a smirk.

"You…. You came all this way to give me a box of chocolates?"

"…And?"

"Well, I guess I really shouldn't be surprised," said Leo with a shake of the head. "Thanks, Ryoko."

"Can I come in? It's tad rude not to invite someone into your house…." Ryo added after a pause.

"My… Roommate wouldn't l-like that very much," Leo grew reasonably nervous upon this request, and turned away from Ryo.

"Your roommate?" Ryo frowned. She smiled and nudged him, "You met a girl, didn't you?"

"Um… Not exactly…" Leo scratched the back of his head and cleared his throat, "I… I better be going now…"

"All right…. But you better get me something for White Day, Leo LeBlanc, and nothing cheap, either. I'm talking Godiva here…"

"LeBlanc, where the hell are you?" Ryo gasped in surprise as she heard Max's voice on the other side of the Leo, and Leo gave her a quick nervous glance and then slunk back into his apartment.

"Max… Is his roommate…. I need a drink…" Ryo shook her head, and walked down the flights of stairs to the _premiere étage_ (this would be considered the first floor to Americans, but in France, the first floor in reality was the second floor. The first floor was more of a lobby).

"Fuji's going to be quite angry when she finds out I took the Romeo to Paris… Especially considering she's in Monaco… Hope she has enough money to catch a cab home…"

Monaco:

"Come on, Mommy needs a Saks Fifth Avenue a shopping spree…." Fuji said as she rolled her dice upon the table, "Damn it!" she growled angrily, "I'm out! This is a rip-off! They're bigger thieves than I am!" She turned away from the table, and found Yukiko sitting at the bar with Toshiro, "Yuki-chan, there's a Chippendale's performance tonight—You want to tag along?"

"Eh, that's absolutely disgusting, Fuji…." Yukiko grimaced.

"Besides, we've already got plans," Toshiro reminded Yukiko with a smirk.

"Ah, I see… Hee hee… Have fun, kids! Jeeze… I'll see what Dori's up to, then…" a dejected Fuji turned away from them and stormed away. She found Odori at a buffet, sitting with Heiji, who shook his head in amazement at what Odori had upon her plate.

"That baby must really love potato salad…" Heiji said as he glanced down at his watch and then back up at Odori.

"Immensely…" Odori replied as she finished off another plate, "And he also enjoys the gelatin here…"

"Which flavor?"

"All of them…" Odori rose, and walked back to the buffet. She picked up a bowl, and began to mix the flavors of Jell-O together, smiling while she did so.

"Hiya, Heiji-chan!" Fuji smiled as she seated herself next to Heiji, "What are you doing here?"

"Reminding Odori to breath in between meals, apparently…" Heiji answered, "She keeps herself on such a strict workout that she can all of this crap… That and she has the metabolism from hell, apparently… I look at a pie and I gain five pounds… Why couldn't _I _have come from Korean rice farmers?"

"Well, we all can't be as blessed," Fuji chuckled. "So, do you have any plans after this?"

"After this I'm probably going to watch Yukiko and Toshiro stumble up to their hotel room drunkenly, then watch Ally bitch and sulk for three solid hours, and then maybe I'll see what's on HBO…"

"Where is Ally-chan?"

"Up in his room sulking… All of the flights to Italy are booked, it seems," Heiji answered.

"Well, it _is_ a romantic getaway," Fuji shrugged.

"That and Carmen had a political matter to attend to, so even if he had made it he wouldn't have gotten to spend that much time with her," Heiji added, taking a sip of his diet soda and looking back at Fuji. "Let me guess… Everyone else is busy, you're feeling lonely, so you want to go do something, right?"

"Hee hee… All the male escort services are booked this time of year…" Fuji answered with a small degree of embarrassment.

"Well, I guess the old saying rings true if even the great Lupin the Fourth can't get a date…"

"…That saying being?"

"You can have all the money in the world and still be a dateless reject…"

"….I don't think I like that saying…."

"I didn't think you would…"

"There is a saying I do like, however…"

"And that saying is…?"

"Heiji'll go on a pity date with me if I agree to pay for everything and also find him an X-Box?" Fuji said with a hopeful smile.

Heiji snorted, "Do you have any idea how many people you'll have to screw to get an X-Box?"

"I'm desperate, man… And it's not like something like that's stopped me before!"

"Well… Okay, but only if you throw in a video game…"

"Sure thing!" Fuji smiled widely, "All right!"

It was about this time that Odori returned with a bowl of multi-colored Jell-O and wordlessly seated herself at the table, and then went to eating the jiggling mass.

"Maybe we should get going…" said Fuji with a pause.

"Good idea…" Heiji nodded, and quietly slid out of the booth after Fuji.

"Oh, sure, leave the pregnant lady alone…" Odori grumbled and she dug into her gelatin bitterly.

Meanwhile, over towards the bar, Yukiko and Toshiro watched as Fuji walked out with Heiji, and both placed their bets as to when Heiji would storm back angrily, threatening to never speak to Fuji again for some heinous act which she had manage to perform while they were out.

"We should really go out and do something together…" said Toshiro suddenly.

"We're both out drinking together," Yukiko responded, raising her shot glass and smiling.

"Eh… You're not exactly the most romantic individual, are you?" Toshiro sighed heavily.

"Hey, it didn't come in the package, Buster…"

"Does your individual product come with add-ons, then?" Toshiro inquired with hope.

"Ha ha… Yeah, extra rounds of ammo and extra packets of smokes…" Yukiko answered with a laugh.

"I'd like you to quit those," Toshiro said suddenly, taking a cigarette from Yukiko's hand as she went to light it. "Could you make it a gift? From you to me? Please?"

"What?" Yukiko snapped, "Me? Why the hell do you want that?"

"Because I'm sick of making out with an ashtray…" Toshiro responded.

"Well, you don't have to do anything with this ashtray, if you feel that way…" snapped Yukiko.

"Come on, Yuki… Your dad did it for you…. Could you please?"

Yukiko paused, "…. What's in it for me?"

"Um… Tickets to _Phantom of the Opera_?" Toshiro suggested.

"Front row."

"Front—What the hell do you take me—"

"Dinner before that. Someplace where you don't talk into a speaker to order dinner."

"Four-star hotel afterward?"

"Nice try, cheapskate."

"Jeeze… I think my wallet just went to go kill itself…"

"Quit your bitching… You know as well as I do that you still have an ass-load of money in the bank."

"How do you know?"

"I check your accounts every once in a while… It's what any good friend would do…"

Toshiro sighed heavily, "Fine… I'll take care of all of it… Anything else?"

"Yep," Yukiko smiled reached over, and retrieved Toshiro's wallet. "I'm gonna go buy myself somethin' nice for the occasion…"

"You're a woman, as hard as you try to hide it…"

"Only when it's to my advantage…" Yukiko answered with a smile. She drew out a few bills, the larger ones, to Toshiro's chagrin, and tossed him the wallet.

"Damn her for knowing I'm nowhere near broke…" Toshiro grumbled, hiding his wallet once again.

Later that Night, Paris:

"You're so lucky the French hate this play…" Toshiro said to Yukiko as he led her out of the limo she had had him rent for the night.

"Go figure…" Yukiko shrugged and laughed, "I can't believe you actually came through with everything!"

"I can't believe you spent four digits on your dress…! I can't believe you wore a dress…"

"Hey, I figured you were going to wear close-toed shoes, so I might as well…" Yukiko shrugged in response.

"Hey… Is that who I think it is?" Toshiro stopped dead in shock as he viewed who else was entering the theater.

"Fuji and Heiji?" Yukiko choked.

An apartment in Paris:

"Tell me again why we've been locked out of our own kitchen, LeBlanc?" Max inquired as he tried to turn the doorknob but was only greeted by Dakota's yells of protest.

"Because she's doing something special…" Leo answered vaguely.

"Can't you bust in through the doorway with your like…. Lupin-like skills?"

"Nah, I think this is cute…"

"Cute… She's probably making a concoction to kill me…."

"Anyone ever tell you you're seriously paranoid?" sighed Leo tiredly.

The kitchen door swung open, and Dakota looked up at the two sternly, "You guys aren't wearing that, are you?"

"Um… What?" Leo inquired, looking down at his attire.

"This is what I usually wear, you little creep!" snapped Max.

"Leo, the only way you could look worse would be if you were wearing brown shoes. Max… You look like a reject from a sequel to _Oh God!..._"

"I don't look like John Denver!" Max shouted angrily.

"Well, um, actually…" Leo started, but then decided this argument was not worth it today.

"You two dress up a little nicer, and then you both get dinner. And not until then!" Dakota yelled. "And if you don't wash your hands, God help both of you!"

"Hee hee… Okay, Dakota…" Leo laughed lightly, "Ah, kids these days… C'mon, Max…."

"She… She just insulted you!" Max shouted, "Are you going to ignore that?"

"Yes. Life's a lot happier when you just ignore the little things that bother you…"

"Huh? What'd you say again?"

"Ha ha… Shuddup…" Leo left into his room, and opened his closet. He picked out a purple turtleneck he had knit himself a while back and then exchanged his black jeans for a pair of looser slacks. As he caught himself in the mirror, he decided to wear his glasses and also give a little attention to his hair, which would need to be cut soon once again.

Max, on the other hand, opted for his contacts that night. He did little but complain as he readied himself for dinner, "Little brat… Comes in and knocks our lives off kilter… Snot-nosed kid… Ouch!" he blinked a few times uncomfortably, and then after his eyes adjusted to the contact,s he walked toward his closet. He exchanged his usual brown suit for a hunter green button-up shirt and a pair of khakis, and he joined Leo out at the dining room table.

"Eh, you look…. Civilian…" Max commented as he seated himself across from Leo, "Nice sweater…"

"…I made it myself…"

"Oh… That's cool…" Max stared down at his salad and forked through it a little, "Where's the flying monkey?"

"Dakota? She said she's brining out drinks…" as Leo spoke, Dakota walked through the doors, holding a glass pitcher, which she set down in between the two. She then poured the dark red liquid into two juice glasses and left.

"How cute… She's acting like it's wine!" Leo chuckled.

Max sipped his drink and gave a small shudder, "It is…"

"….I don't keep wine…"

"I do," Max responded quickly. "It's a 1924 red wine… I paid seventy euros for it…"

"And we're drinking it in juice glasses… C'est le vie…"

"There anything you find fishy in any of this, LeBlanc?" Max inquired as he watched Dakota come out with a main dish.

"Aw, what'd you make, Sweetie?" Leo asked with amusement.

"Macaroni and cheese and tomatoes and fish..."

"All which go well with red wine," Max muttered to himself, much to Leo's chagrin.

"Thank you, Dakota!" Leo called. "You really should be nicer, Max… She'd like you if you gave her the chance!"

"I don't want the chance… I don't even like children! I don't want any!" snapped Max.

"Then what are you going to do when I have some?" Leo inquired.

"That'd involve you getting a girlfriend first, and that could take a lot of therapy, so I'm not holding my breath…" Max mumbled in response, "Kids don't like me and I don't like them! It's a mutual agreement!"

Leo shook his head, "You're someone's stereotypical cranky Uncle Max…."

"Oh, no…. I _am_ a stereotypical cranky Uncle Max…." Max mumbled, shaking his head in realization.

"Well, there's a way to cure that, ya know," Leo smiled and turned his head to a side.

"And that is?" Max inquired.

Leo looked down at a piece of his cut up tomato, and before Max knew it, Leo had thrown it at him, and it made impact with his face, "What the hell'd you do that for?" Max wondered aloud.

"You need to loosen up, Zenigata!" Leo laughed in response.

"Yeah? I'll show you 'loosen up'…" Max picked up a glass of the wine, and Leo's smile fell.

"No, Max… No no no no no…" Leo warned sternly as he rose out of his seat and backed away from Zenigata quickly.

"Hey, you're the one who just threw tomato at me!" Max replied, "Now fair's fair, so bottom's up, LeBlanc…"

"Na-ah…. That's not fair!" Leo ran back into the living room, and Max followed him. Leo backed away from Max until he found he could no longer back into anywhere, and he fell into a corner chair. Max rested one of his knees upon the arm of the chair and smiled, and craned his neck down to Leo's level.

Leo wished he could find an escape route as he met eye contact with Max briefly; he really wanted out of his situation about then. This train of thought though was interrupted by the pouring of cold red wine upon the top of his head.

"Max, you jerk!" Leo cried angrily.

"Fair's fair!" Max laughed.

"Not funny…" Leo grumbled, wiping his face as the wine trickled down it.

"Aw… Now who's got the bent out of shape personality?" Max chuckled.

"I'm gonna go change…" Leo rose, and walked out of the room. Max waited a few moments before turning around and sitting in the same chair, and he looked to Leo's door with thought while he sat there quietly.

"I guess you're not coming back to dinner then, eh?" Dakota sighed heavily as she poked her head out of the hall and spoke to Max.

"Hrm? Eh, no… Thanks, though…" Max replied numbly.

The Paris Opera House:

"What are you doing here?" Toshiro asked as he stood in front of Heiji and Fuji in the lobby of the theater.

"Visiting a friend. And I wanted Heiji-chan to come with me!" Fuji answered.

"Who are you meet….?" Yukiko stopped as she looked at who hobbled toward them. She was a familiar blonde, wearing an arm brace and sporting a cast upon her leg.

"Pleasure to see you here, Lupin," Sara said with a smirk as she leaned upon her cane. "I'm glad we could arrange this…"

"You're lucky; I hate the opera, but for you, I made an exception…" Fuji replied.

"With Heiji Ishikawa as well, I see," she added with a smirk. "He's quite lucky…."

"How're you coping, Sara?" asked Fuji.

"Well, I found an apartment…" Von Idle answered, "Starting from scratch isn't the easiest, and I'm only now learning how to do my own laundry… But I'm much happier… Thank you…"

"Wait, what happened to the treasure, then?" asked Heiji quickly.

"Eh he he he… That's between us girls," Fuji chuckled in response and nudged Heiji.

"Here's my address," said Sara, handing Fuji a slip of paper. "You may know it…"

"This is below Max and Leo's!" Fuji gasped.

"So I can keep track…. Well, I must be off now… Important date..."

"You have a date?" Fuji squealed.

"No—You do, I see…" Sara laughed, and turned back and out the revolving glass doors, leaving Fuji slightly amused by this.


	5. Witch Doctor

DISCLAIMER: Um… Not mine? No owny Lupin… 'Kay?

Hello there!

Well, it's not exactly two weeks since my last update, so I'm getting back on track with my updating, huh? I've been busy as usual, but I recently have gotten my inspiration back, thanks to 'Yuki', who this chapter is also dedicated to, for doing things for me which I will be forever grateful for.

Fun Fact of Boredom: All right, you probably figured out that Leo LeBlanc's named after Maurice LeBlanc, at least partially, right? Well, his cousin, Victor Lupin, is named after none other than Victor Hugo, another French novelist.

_'Ring my friend I said you'd call Doctor Robert,  
Day or night he'll be there anytime at all,  
Doctor Robert,  
Doctor Robert, you're a new and better man,  
He helps you to understand,  
He does ev'rything he can, Doctor Robert_._'_

—The Beatles, _'Doctor Robert'_

Chapter Five

The Next Day: Witch Doctor

Paris, France:

"So, you kids have a good night?" Dakota asked slyly as Max and Leo trudged out of their rooms. She had busied herself at making breakfast, and looked up from the stovetop as both seated themselves at the kitchen table.

"I still smell like grape juice…" Leo yawned, "I'm still tired, too… You think on a day off I'd finally have caught up on some sleep…"

"It's those damn incubus dreams you keep having…" Max responded wearily.

"Huh?"

"Night terrors… I did some reading on it last night…" Max answered, "I found the name of a good psychiatrist for you… You're going to him today…"

"What?" Leo yelped.

"You're so paranoid of women you can barely look at a Sports Illustrated and you keep having those dreams…. You need to see someone, LeBlanc," Zenigata answered. "I'm driving you down today… You can catch the bus home."

"You can't do that!" Leo shrieked.

"Too bad," Max said quickly. "Hey, you little brat, get me some coffee…"

"Do I _look_ like your maid?" snapped Dakota.

"Get me my coffee now or I turn you in to the cops!" snapped Max.

"Leo, tell him he can't!" Dakota moaned.

"Both of you, quiet, now!" Leo yelled quickly.

A Hotel Room in Paris:

Ally sighed as he looked down at the photograph he held in his hand. It was one of himself and Carmen… It was during the first time they were supposed to get married, "What the hell's wrong with me?" he wondered aloud, "She's a great girl, why can't I just…?" He stopped in mid-sentence and smiled at the ad on the television, "A shrink who can solve any problem, neh? And he speaks English? Maybe… Well, for her, anything!" he laughed, and grabbed a phone by the bed.

That Evening, the Leo and Max's apartment:

"Leo's home!" Dakota said excitedly as she watched Leo walk off the bus and onto the sidewalk.

"I wonder how his appointment went…" Max wondered out loud.

Dakota raised her eyebrow as Leo reached over and grabbed a woman by the hand, and began to speak to her, "… I think well…"

Max gave a small cold glare, and turned away from the window, "Hpmh, guess so…"

"Hey, how's everyone doing?" Leo asked cheerily as he entered the apartment, "Max, you look great today, have I told you that? You've really got a glow about you today, Zenigata… And Dakota, what have you been up to today, huh? Probably something really constructive and useful—You're such a smart kid, did you know that?"

"….I'm gonna let you take this…." Dakota said after a pause, turning and walking into the laundry room.

"Um, seems like your appointment went… Extremely well, Leo…" Max said, somewhat uncomfortably.

"Yeah, sure did… Hey, Beautiful, why don't you help me with dinner, eh?" Leo suggested.

"Um… I've got to go do a load of laundry…." Max replied, and slowly inched his way into the laundry room. He found Dakota playing a game of solitaire on the small table in the laundry room, "Something's really wrong with him, I know it…"

"You think it's the shrink?" Dakota inquired.

"It's gotta be…" Max answered, "What do you think we should do?"

"Why in the hell are you asking me?" Dakota said with a sneer. "Okay, okay… I say we give it the night… Besides, this guy's probably closed by now… We just need to hold out until then…"

"All right," Max nodded, "and if I have to go back out there, you do, too."

"Hey, I'm not the one he called 'Beautiful'…"

"Eh, you heard that?"

"Yeah, and I would've given all of my Yu-Gi-Oh cards to see your face…" Dakota answered as she rose from her card table and walked back out with Max.

Leo was preparing things for dinner when they walked out, whistling to himself as he did so, "Oh, hey, guys! Dakota, you want to finish setting the table, Honey, okay?"

"Umm… Sure…" Dakota said slowly, and briefly met Max's line of vision as she went to setting the table.

A little later that night, a Paris hotel:

Ally stared down at the pills. They were from the psychiatrist's visit earlier that day… He had never liked taking any sort of medication, so that's why he had put off taking them most of the day.

"What're those, Ally?" asked Heiji as Ishikawa walked into their hotel room.

"Pills from a shrink…" Ally answered, "I went earlier today… He gave me these… The weird thing is that it was such a quick visit… I mean, I was there less than an hour, and he's got a prescription for me!"

"How about you let me take a look at those, Ally?" Heiji suggested.

"Yeah, I'd feel better if you did…" Ally admitted, and tossed the bottle to Heiji.

"This label's bogus, I can tell you that off the bat…" Heiji said as he studied the bottle, "I'll be back…" he walked out of the room, and down the hall a few steps to Yukiko and Toshiro's room. He knocked on the door, and held the bottle in front of Toshiro after his brother had opened the door, "You broke up plenty of drug busts in NYC; I need to know if you know what these are. Are they illegal, are they deadly?"

Toshiro took the bottle, and walked with Heiji back into his room. He opened the bottle, and studied the pills. "….Where'd you find these?"

"Al had them," replied Heiji. "Why? Are they bad?"

"Very," Toshiro replied. "They're hallucinogens… I busted a Columbian drug ring four years ago that was peddling these…"

"Hey, um, I'm not an advocate for drugs or anything, but what's wrong with these?" asked Heiji, "I mean, sure, who hasn't done a hallucinogen, whether it be out of free will or just a freak accident at a Christmas party?"

"These things can make people take risks they usually wouldn't take… If Ally took enough of these, he wouldn't think twice about stepping in front of a train," Toshiro answered. "This stuff's bad… It's worse than being drunk, except your coordination remains intact… It's like it totally kills your judgment."

"Holy crap…" said Heiji, wide-eyed, "Could you imagine giving one of those to _Fuji_?"

"She'd probably give Ryo a lap dance…" Toshiro replied.

"Just like that movie…. What?"

"How lonely is your world?"

"I don't need women to make me happy," Heiji responded.

"Are you sure you're not a Jigen?" asked Toshiro.

"Who the hell knows," shrugged Heiji in response.

"Well, anyway, flush these down the toilet, and find out how Ally came across these, all right?" Toshiro instructed, shuffling all of the pills back into their container and then going into the bathroom to wash his hands of the residue.

Heiji did as Toshiro instructed, and returned a short time later with the address of the psychiatrist. He had almost had to sedate Ally, who grew very angry when he found out what he had almost taken. It was well known that Jigen detested all forms of drugs. Toshiro and Yukiko went down to the said address to investigate.

The building was square, with glass paneling with lettering upon it that read, 'Dr. V. Lauren, PhD.'.

"I'm half-tempted to shoot out his windows," Yukiko admitted as she dismounted Toshiro's Vespa.

"Well, if he isn't the loon I'm positive he is, maybe he could give you something for your smoking…." Toshiro said with a smirk.

"Don't remind me," said Yukiko with a sneer. "I'd do Zenigata for a cigarette right now…"

"Which one?"

"I don't care," she admitted with a shake of the head as they entered the building. They walked up to the receptionist, who took one look at them, at Toshiro's samurai outfit and red hair and Yukiko's masculine white suit, and led them into the psychiatrist's office immediately.

"Hello!" said Dr. Lauren as the two entered, "Ah, a couple, excellent! Now, do what do I owe the pleasure? Why have you two come here today?"

"Because you're a—" Yukiko started, but Toshiro quickly held her back and smiled.

"She's afraid of commitment, obsessed with work, paranoid, feels she has to keep up her father's legacy, and is afraid of showing any sort of femininity," Toshiro said.

"What?" Yukiko shrieked, "Well, you're brooding, jealous, afraid to show affection and has serious family issues!"

"Only as bad as yours…"

"Your mother poisoned me!" snapped Yukiko.

"…I see we have some serious issues to work with… Why don't you both take a seat?" Dr. Lauren instructed, "Now, let's begin with you, Ma'am… What was your childhood like?"

"I lived with my mom until I was six and she faked her own death. She sent me to live with my father, but I didn't know this guy was my father until about two weeks later. He tried to leave me after he found out he was going blind, but his friends tracked him down. He married a woman half his age who also had tried to kill him at one point. She gave him five children. One's a race car driver, one's a martial artist, one's a psychotic ex-cop, and the other two are twin babies," said Yukiko in a long string of speech which surprised Toshiro and also the psychiatrist, it was apparent.

"And you, Sir?" he inquired, turning to Toshiro.

"Who, me? I had a fairly normal childhood…"

"Please," Yukiko snorted, "you didn't see a TV until you were eight…"

Toshiro glared at her, "I'm not going to go on some long spiel about how awful my life was…"

"Fine, I'll do it for you, then," snapped Yukiko. She turned to the psychiatrist and began, "He's the bastard son of two warring clans. His uncle kidnapped him when he was two, and he grew up thinking his father was his older brother. He moved to New York and fell in love with his caretaker who was seven years older than him and she was pregnant with his child when his biological mother killed her. He was known as the Robin Hood of New York, because he stole from the rich and gave to the poor, because he's such a friggin' cowboy…"

"You make it sound like I had an unstable childhood!" snapped Toshiro.

"Because you did," replied Yukiko, "you were screwed up for years about it, and you still are…"

"….I see we have some dominancy issues, here," said the psychiatrist.

"Say what?" Yukiko blinked a few times in wonder.

"See, I'm not the only one who thinks it…" said Toshiro, folding his arms and closing his eyes in meditation.

"You're quite overpowering," said Dr. Lauren to Yukiko.

"My ass! I have to be because he's such a damn passive—"

"Only because you're so dominant!" Toshiro finished.

"I take it you're both conflicting blood types…" said Dr. Lauren.

Toshiro stopped and looked at Dr. Lauren suspiciously, "How do you know after blood types? That's a Japanese thing…"

"I see programs on cable sometimes!" replied Dr. Lauren without skipping a beat.

"Oh, were you watching what he was last night?" Yukiko inquired of the doctor, nodding towards Toshiro, who had gone pale at this.

"I'm quite positive…." nodded Dr. Lauren.

Yukiko smiled widely, "I didn't know you were a fan of _Naughty Night Nurses_, Doc…"

"The batteries to my remote died!" snapped Toshiro, who had flushed at this, "I wouldn't watch crap like that on purpose!"

"I guess we weren't watching the same program, then! I was watching _Speed Racer_…" replied Dr. Lauren, "But, anyway… You two have some serious issues with relationships, I can see… Here, come with me, I'll give you a prescription."

Both rose, and Toshiro leaned in to whisper to Yukiko as they walked a good distance away from Dr. Lauren, "Great way to play along, Yuki! I was starting to believe everything you were saying myself!"

"What in the hell are you talking about?" asked Yukiko with a whisper.

"Well, he sees we're both a little off, so now he's taking us to where he gets his pills, so we can come back—"

Yukiko smiled and laughed, "You sneaky bastard!"

"Now, I suggest you both stay here for a few hours after you take these. You won't be in any condition to drive," said Dr. Lauren. "I've had two stubborn patients today who wouldn't stay."

"Well, what the heck?" Yukiko asked, turning to Toshiro and shrugging. They watched as Dr. Lauren went into a steel cabinet in a storage room, and he retrieved two small plastic cups, each with a white pill in it. Toshiro looked to Yukiko, Yukiko looked to Toshiro, and both took the pills and downed them.

Later, a comfortable looking room in the psychiatrist's office:

"How're they doing?" Dr. Lauren asked as he viewed Yukiko and Toshiro in their comfortable room via hidden camera.

"Well, they've been singing for the past half hour…" said the cameraman.

"Good… We'll have those two S.O.B.'s so drugged up they won't think twice about jumping off of the roof of this place!" Dr. Lauren chuckled in an eerily familiar tone, and turned to leave, "Well, I'm going to go check on my patients, now…"

The Hotel room:

"Thanks," Heiji said as he hung up his cell phone and turned back to Fuji, "That Dr. Lauren—Not registered anywhere…"

Fuji nodded and shifted her place in her chair, "I'm wondering who this guy is, then…"

"He just appeared out of nowhere!" answered Heiji with a confused shrug as he looked down at his laptop, "But there're ships coming in from Columbia tonight… You think they've got drugs?"

Fuji smiled widely, "Well, there's one way to find out, how isn't there?" she jumped up and smiled, "Ryo-san, get your wet suit!"

"…Why?" asked Ryo, looking away from the black and white cowboy movie on the television. Odori was sitting on the couch next to Ryo, not to watch the movie, but to eat the popcorn.

"A ship?" Odori set the popcorn down and smiled, "Perfect for Zantetsuken!"

"Nah-ah, don't think about it, Mommy," said Fuji, holding a hand out in front of Odori. "You don't need to worry about a cargo ship; you're carrying your own cargo."

"I'll take Zantetsuken if you want, Dori," said Heiji.

"But I don't want you to…. I want to go… Someone almost sold Ally drugs, and any noble samurai who knows anything about the bushido knows that it's only within code to track down the perpetrators…"

"Odori, I can't believe I'm saying this, but Fuji's absolutely right—You should stay here," Ryo added.

"Yeah, you can guard this, Odori," Fuji said with a smile, handing the samurai a wooden box. "It's very important, but you can't open it, and you can't let anyone else, either. It's got a poison gas trap that triggers when you open it."

"What does it contain?" Odori inquired, taking the box and studying it carefully.

"Ancient scrolls from the… Bushi Clan…" said Fuji.

"The Bushi Clan? I'm not familiar with them, and I trained dozens of clansmen…" said Odori, puzzled.

"Well, they're a secret ninja society, who hates your clan, that's why! They refuse to train with you, because you're a woman!" said Fuji.

"Those incompetent dogs!" Odori snarled, "Of course I will keep this safe, Fuji! I won't let those fiends lay a single finger upon this treasure while I'm alive!"

"Terrific. Now, Ally, Heiji, you two get the oxygen tanks out…" Fuji instructed.

"Why us?" asked Ally.

"Because you're boys," said Fuji with a wink. "Now, c'mon, let's get going…"

Leo and Max's Apartment:

Dinner was bizarre. Neither Max nor Dakota knew exactly what their stew was made out of, but whole boiled eggs and large chunks of celery were present. Now both exchanged uncomfortable glances as Leo laughed to himself.

"Hey, I'm gonna go get the desert!" Leo said with a cheery ring as he exited.

Dakota leaned inward to Max, "This is really scary… I think that there's a full crawfish floating around in my soup…"

Max forked through the thick mixture a little, and grimaced, "I think I've got a mini pancake…."

"Leo's not in his right mind, Zenigata, and I say we call a truce until this is over. I don't like you, and you don't like me, but it's the only way…"

"Well, he's on some kinda happy right now, so, definitely," Max shook her hand, and both watched as Leo exited the kitchen with omelets.

"Who wants some?" Leo asked brightly.

The psychiatrist's office:

"I really can't stay…" Yukiko started as she laid upon a psychiatrist's couch.

"But baby it's cold outside," Toshiro added as he sat on the floor of the same office.

"I've got to go away…"

"But baby it's cold outside…"

"This evening has been…"

"Been hoping that you'd drop in…"

"So very nice…"

"I'll hold your hands, they're just like ice…"

"My mother will start to worry…"

"How are my two favorite patients doing, hm?" Dr. Lauren asked as he opened the door of the room and looked at Yukiko and Toshiro.

"Freakin' terrific, Doc!" said Yukiko with a laugh, "Hey, you know what's funny?"

"The word armadillo?" asked Toshiro.

"Yeah, yeah, that… And the walls… I mean, you ever just look at the walls? Aren't they… Wow…" Yukiko chuckled wildly, and covered her laughter with her fedora, which she hid her face with.

Dr. Lauren smiled, "Well, you two seem good enough to go… Here's a supply for you both, and be sure to take the entire bottle now…"

Toshiro rose and walked over to the doctor, "Do we come back after we're done?"

"I don't think that will be necessary," answered Dr. Lauren with a shake of the head.

"Well, good bye for now, Doc!" Yukiko slapped Dr. Lauren hard on the back, and both exited.

Toshiro spit the pill he had kept under his tongue into the gutter as he walked out of the office with Yukiko, "If I had to sing one more duet…"

"I would've gone crazy for real!" Yukiko completed, "That guy's a friggin' freak…"

"Yeah… You've got the pills?" Toshiro inquired as he climbed onto his Vespa.

"Right here," Yukiko replied, holding up the bottle.

It was then that a man on a bicycle sped by, knocking into Yukiko. Yukiko gave a stunned look at she leaned upon the Vespa, and Toshiro immediately grew concerned, "Yukiko, are you all right? Did he hurt you?"

"Um… Not good…" said Yukiko worriedly.

"What's not good?" asked Toshiro.

"I swallowed by pill…" replied Yukiko, looking up at Toshiro gravely.

The hotel room, later:

Odori's eyes flashed open at the sound of laughter and falling. She quickly rose from the couch, and looked down at the box once more before taking her place by the door. She swung Zantetsuken's sheath as the door opened, by was shocked as someone strong grabbed hold of it. Toshiro glared at her, and Yukiko laughed loudly.

"What's up with her?" asked Odori.

"She swallowed one of Doctor Crazy's happy pills…" replied Toshiro. He lifted Yukiko up, and walked into one of the bedrooms, "Where are the others?"

"They went to go check out a ship," answered Odori. "Fuji left me to guard a treasure which she has acquired recently."

"Huh… Um… Okay…" said Toshiro slowly as he laid eyes upon the box, "I'm going to put our little pill popper to bed…"

"I'll look after her as well, if you wish," said Odori from the living room.

"That's all right. I need to be up with her until she gets this out of her system. I don't want you trying to fight her off, Odori."

"I'm not helpless, you know," snapped Odori with annoyance. "I'm sick of everyone thinking I've lost my fighting skills because I've put on a little weight."

"It's more than a little weight, Odori," said Toshiro, "that's someone that's relying on you to keep them safe. You're the _yojimbo_ (samurai bodyguard) of that baby, and, more importantly, you're its mother."

"Hm, I didn't think you knew any Japanese anymore," said an obviously impressed Odori.

"Ha ha…. Very, very funny," said Toshiro with a roll of the eyes as he laid Yukiko down on her bed and rolled her out of her dress jacket. "God, this is worse than you going and getting drunk without me!"

Yukiko gave another laugh, "Hey, you've got a good idea!"

"Huh?" before Toshiro could inquire anymore, Yukiko kissed him. "…How come it's always when you're out of your mind that you seem to like me?" asked Toshiro with a sigh, "Come on, let me get your gun and holster off of you, Yuki…"

"I'll bet you say that to all of the girls…." Yukiko trailed off, and soon was snoring.

"And she bitches about how she'll have to take care of _me _if we get married," he said with a roll of the eyes.

A Shipping Port:

"You guys are there," said Heiji through the microphone as he looked over the layout of the ship on his laptop in his care, which was parked about three blocks away from the actual docks.

"Great. Thanks, Heiji-chan," said Fuji through the other end.

A gun shot through a lock on a door of the ship, and three figures in wet suits entered, the only male of the three looking about to check and see if the coast was clear before the other two ventured any further.

Fuji removed her mask and breathing apparatus, and looked down either side of the hall, "All right, Heij, where to now?"

"Take a left," replied Heiji. "Crap…"

"What's wrong?" Fuji asked worriedly, stopping dead in her tracks.

"I lost another game of solitaire," answered Heiji with a discontented sigh.

"I'm glad you think you're funny, Heiji," said Ryo coolly. "All right, let's get going…"

"Just hold me back from those bastards…" said Ally with a snarl.

"I'm starting to think we should've left you in the car, Ally-kun," said Fuji with worry as she stalked down the hall with the two Jigen siblings.

"They'll regret ever tangoing with Daisuke Allen Jigen…" grumbled Ally, balling his fists tightly.

"Shh… Quiet, both of you," Ryo ordered, stopping in the hall. "There's someone coming…"

"Well, you guys know what that means," Fuji smiled widely, and lowered the zipper of her wet suit, and jumped out at the guards. "Hey, boys, get a load of these!"

Both guards ducked out of the way as Fuji threw the two bombs she carried, one in either hand, and she also ducked out of the way, "Come on, we need to get the hell out of here and upstairs!" she took off into a run, the two following behind. Fuji suddenly came to a stop, and Ryo slammed into her, followed by Ally.

"Ow… Both of you get off of me!" grumbled Fuji quietly.

"Hey, who's talking?" asked Ally quietly.

"That's what I'm trying to find out…" Fuji finished unzipping her wet suit, removed a mask from a hidden compartment in a belt she carried about her wet suit, and she soon look like an average shipmate.

"Heh, good look for you, Fuji…" said Ryo with amusement.

Fuji gave a short glare, and turned to the door, "Watch my ass, okay?"

"Well, every other guy does it, so what the hell?" Ally chuckled.

Fuji rolled her eyes, and turned back towards the door where the talking originated from. She slunk it, and gasped, "Victor…"

"Huh?" Victor Lupin shot his head up, and chomped on his cigarette, "Who are you? What in the hell are you doing in here?"

"Came to let you know that dinner was ready, Sir," said Fuji, saluting.

"I ate already," snapped Victor. He squinted, and leaned inward, "…Do I know you?"

"I'm not sure," answered Fuji with a shake of the head. "Perhaps, I mean, I've—"

"Well, it doesn't matter… Soon I won't be screwing with any of you sewer rats," said Victor with a wave of the hand as he walked back over to a desk with a booklet upon it. Fuji smirked as she laid eyes upon the booklet. She didn't understand the writing, but she could tell it was important to Victor by the way he hovered about it.

"Sir!" another crew member scrambled into Remy's office, "There's a fire on deck!"

"What?" Victor growled, "Damn it! Freakin' idiots!" he stormed out, and Fuji chuckled quietly as he did so.

"Thanks, Heiji…" she chuckled as she stuffed the booklet down her shirt and exited.

Outside:

"Not bad… Not bad at all…" said Heiji as he watched the blaze quickly spread over the deck. He was sitting in the Alfa Romeo, the bow still in his hands and the extra arrows with gasoline wrapped cloths wrapped about the tips on the floorboard. He quickly sped away to a safe distance, and met with Ally, Fuji and Ryo a few blocks away from the pier.

"So it's that bastard, neh?" Ally said darkly.

"You should've let me shoot him, Fuji," said Ryo.

"Hey, here's a list of patients he's seen!" said Fuji quickly as she scanned through the book, "…Oh, no…"

"What's up, Fuji?" asked Heiji.

"Leo LeBlanc is on this list… God, I hope he hasn't taken any of those pills!" said Fuji worriedly.

"We've got to go get him, then!" said Ryo.

"And have Zenigata arrest us? No, thanks. Besides, we've got bigger things to worry about right now…" said Fuji.

"Like what? What could be more important than the life of your brother?" asked Ryo.

"How about my own life? If Odori opens that box, she's going to find out that all that's in there is a bottle of Flintstone's Vitamins!" answered Fuji.

"We'll take care of all of this in good time, but I agree with both of you… We need to check on Leo, and we need a plan," said Ally.

"I'm surprised you just don't want to go in there and kill him, Ally," Heiji admitted.

"What do you think my plan is?" Ally inquired.


	6. Thank Heaven for Little Girls

DISCLAIMER: Um, I don't own Lupin III, but the list of characters I do own in here goes on and on…

Hi!

Well, this chapter's out pretty quick, neh? Surprised? I am! Well, here is the latest installment of the series… Please let me know how I'm doing so far! It only helps with my improvement, really! I'm not sure if I'll be able to update this quickly again, but I will, as always, try to produce a high-quality chapter as soon as possible! Enjoy!

P.S.: Oh, by the way, if you're signed up for Yahoo Groups, and you have Lupin fanart or links to your fanfics, I've got a group running now, called Lupin fanworks—jlucydaisuke. I've got a few pictures of the main characters of my own series up now, so you can even see those if you want! It's not very big right now, so feel free to leave anything behind when you visit!

Fun Fact of Boredom: In one of the episodes of the ultra-bizarre anime _FLCL_, there's a homage to Lupin, where the crazy father actually enters dressed as Lupin himself! Toshiro's yellow Vespa is based off of character Haruko's yellow Vespa, in a nod to this reference!

_'__Mother Superior jump the gun  
Mother Superior jump the gun.  
Happiness is a warm gun  
Happiness is a warm gun  
When I hold you in my arms  
And I feel my finger on your trigger  
I know no one can do me no harm  
Because happiness is a warm gun.  
Yes it is_._'_

—The Beatles, _'Happiness is Warm Gun'_

Chapter Six

The Next Day: Thank Heaven for Little Girls

"Where's Leo now?" Max inquired as he looked up from his newspaper.

"Throwing up again," said Dakota worriedly as she walked out of LeBlanc's bedroom, "Max, he's running a fever, too, and he's still acting as crazy as ever…"

"Yeah, I'm worried too, Kid," Max admitted.

"Why can't we go to that shrink? Leo wasn't acting like a total weirdo until this," said Dakota.

"Good idea, but I can't leave you here with him when he's this unpredictable," Max replied.

"Then we'll take your police cruiser!" Dakota responded quickly.

"Are you kidding? He's a Lupin! He can break out of anything!" snapped Zenigata.

"He's a Lupin who's jumping on the bed and singing _Uptown Girl_…."

"You know I can't afford to buy her pearls! Maybe someday when my ship comes i-n…" Leo stopped as there was a loud thud, and he laughed, "Ow… I think I broke my pancreas…"

"….You get his jacket, I'll tie his shoes…" said Max.

"Deal," Dakota nodded and disappeared.

When they drove down to Dr. Lauren's business, they were greeted with a sign that read 'OUT OF BUSINESS'.

"This is fishier and fishier…" muttered Max to himself as he stopped the car and leaned upon the steering wheel, "Hey, kid, what's your waist size?"

"Why?" asked Dakota.

"There's an opening up there," said Max, pointing up to an opened door on the roof. "I can't fit, but I know someone who can…"

"Wait, how will I get up there?" Dakota asked worriedly.

Max gave a smile which truly concerned Dakota, and soon she found herself upon the roof of the business, "Max… Max, I'm afraid of heights!"

"So's Yukiko Jigen, but she's still tough!" called Max. "Dakota, you can do it! If something happens, yell!"

"Ooo…" she looked down into the darkened passageway, and jumped into it.

Max smiled, and turned back to his police cruiser, and became quite pale as he saw the back door hanging open, and no sign of Leo, "Leo?" Max shouted, "Leo? Arséne? Ari? LeBlanc? Lupin?" he called as he worriedly ran down the street.

Meanwhile, Dakota continued her crawl down the narrow tunnel way, the passage ahead as black as the passage behind her. She came to a dead stop as she felt something in front of her, and grabbed onto it. It was a foot, wearing a soft slipper-like shoe. She gasped in horror, and the masculine voice gave out a yell of surprise, and cursed as he hit his head upon the top of the small tunnel.

Dakota quickly began to back out, the person in front of her following, "Max! Max, I'm yelling now! Come and get me! MAX!"

But Zenigata was about two blocks away by this point, still looking for Leo LeBlanc. He was frantically yelling for his friend, and grew more and more worried as each person wearing purple who he thought could be Leo turned out to be a dud.

He finally found Leo, who had somehow managed to wind up in front of an ice cream parlor, muttering to himself.

"Come on, Leo," said Max quietly taking Leo by the shoulders and leading him to the cruiser. "You aren't in your right mind right now, Buddy, but that's okay… We'll get this sorted out…." He adjusted Leo's jacket, and frowned with suspicion as he heard a rattling noise. He reached into one of Leo's jacket pockets, and found a bottle of pills, prescribed by none other than Dr. Lauren.

"God the lights are too bright… They… They're making my head hurt…" said Leo to Max while clenching his aching head.

It was then Max noticed the gash running down Leo's arm, "Leo… Leo, how'd you get this?"

Leo blinked with shock and perhaps a few moments' clarity, "I… I don't know… I don't know… What's going on?"

"That's what I'm trying to figure out, partner…" responded Max, "Come on, let's get over here…" he led Leo to a park bench, and seated him upon it, removing his coat before seating himself. He ripped off a strip of it, and tied it about Leo's arm, and continued to do so.

"You're ruining your jacket…" muttered Leo dully.

"I don't care," Max answered quietly. "I've got a million of these, and one of you."

"I love you, Ryoko," said Leo suddenly.

Max stopped, bit his lip, and nodded to himself, and then continued in silence. After he finished, he lifted Leo up, and the two trudged back to the police cruiser. Max gasped as he saw Dakota run out of the tunnel, followed by Ally Jigen.

"Allen Jigen, you're under arrest!" Max shouted.

"Hey, you're a kid!" gasped Ally, paying no attention to Zenigata and instead staring in shock at Dakota, who began to deliver a swift kick to him, but was stopped midway by one of Ally's arms.

"Zenigata, Fuji wants to talk to you!" Ally called as he fended off Dakota once more.

"Okay," Max nodded. "You ride with us. Dakota, come down from there!"

"How do I know you won't arrest me?" asked Ally suspiciously.

"Because I've got a partner to worry about," Max responded.

"What happened to Ari's arm?" Ally inquired with worry.

"That's the least of our problems. Right now, he's not even on the same planet as us," responded Max quickly.

"Okay, I'll be right down," nodded Ally.

"Get her down, too, Jigen, she's afraid of heights!" called Max.

"All right," Ally nodded, and picked up Dakota. "All right, Kid, now hang on."

"Why? Why should I hang on?" Dakota asked with wide-eyed worry.

Ally backed up to the edge of the back of the building, and began to run, and jumped off the roof, all while Dakota screamed and grasped on tightly to his neck. She panted as Ally let her down, and she shakily walked over to the police cruiser and leaned upon it while she caught her breath.

"Come on. Ally, you get in the back. Dakota, get in the front seat," Max ordered.

"You want me to help you load Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds over here into your back seat?" asked Ally as he looked over to Leo.

"Yeah, that'd be smart," Max nodded.

"Which is exactly why he thought of it and you didn't," added Dakota as she climbed into her passenger seat.

Ally laughed, "I like her… Who is she, anyway?"

"She's just on vacation. You remember the Daniel Thomas case, from about two and a half years ago?" asked Max.

"That's Dakota? Jeeze, she's really grown!"

"Glad someone noticed," said Dakota as she looked at Max with a small glare. Max shrugged his shoulders and led Leo into the police cruiser with the help of Ally. Ally also climbed into the back of the vehicle along with Leo. Leo clung onto Ally for the ride home, much to the dislike.

Ally gave directions back to the Lupin hideout, which he knew was risky, but he had few other options.

"In here," Ally nodded. "Okay, Ari, let go now."

"His name is Leo LeBlanc," said Max with a snap.

"Jeeze, okay, Zenigata… Don't go looking like you're going to kick my ass across the continent over it…" muttered Ally.

"Trust me, if this were better circumstances, I would," Max replied as he exited the vehicle. "Let's get him out of here… Does this place have an elevator?"

"Nope," Ally replied, shaking his head.

"I don't get it—Her dad stayed in five star hotels, and she always finds the crap holes of the city. This place is nice, but it's a hick motel compared to what he old man stayed in," said Max.

"She likes a lower profile," responded Ally.

"Funny, the only thing I connected to her was her neckline," Max said with a bit of amusement in his voice.

"Ha ha… That's my boss, okay?"

"Boss? Not friend?"

"She's not exactly like her dad in that sense, either. I don't see why Ryoko puts up with her, sometimes."

"It's because she promised to protect her…" said Leo slurridly.

Max looked at Ally, but Ally only shrugged in response, "Don't look at me. I'm as lost as you are."

The two lifted Leo up the seven flights of stairs to where Fuji's hideout was, and Toshiro was more than a little surprised to see Ally and Max carrying a tired-looking Leo up to Fuji's hotel room, and Dakota following them a few cautious steps behind.

Ryo and Fuji were playing a card game when they entered. Ryo extinguished her cigarette, and Fuji tried to avoid showing surprise, but this was difficult to do. The sight was just too strange not to gawk at.

"Can we lay him on the couch?" asked Ally.

"What the hell? I take you out to check out Lauren's office and get lunch, and you come back with Zenigata, LeBlanc, and… Who are you?"

"I'm Dakota," replied Dakota tiredly. "Daniel's daughter."

"Oh… I'm sorry about your dad…" Fuji said with true condolence.

"What are you talking about?" Dakota asked, furrowing her brow.

"Hey, what happened to Leo's arm?" Ryo asked, rising and studying his arm.

"I don't know… He's been acting crazy since he got back from a psychiatrist…" Max explained.

"It wouldn't happen to be Dr. V. Lauren, would it?" asked Fuji.

"Um, yeah…" answered Max slowly.

"Crap… He's on the same stuff as Yukiko!" said Fuji.

"What am I missing here?" Max inquired.

"Dr. Lauren's our cousin…" explained Fuji.

"He looks a little old to me…" said Max.

"Not like that! He's Victor! V. Lauren, V. Lupin?"

"…Son of a bitch…"

"Exactly," Fuji nodded.

"Ryoko?" Leo asked dully as Ryo took Leo's arm and studied it. His legs collapsed underneath him, and Ryo quickly caught him, and helped him to find a seat on the couch.

"He's running a fever… Just like Yukiko…" Ryo muttered with worry.

"How's she doing, anyway?" Ally asked, turning to Fuji.

"Still throwing up," responded Fuji.

"Victor you bastard… You bastard…" said Ryo under her breath.

"Wait, the actual doctor is Victor?" Ally gulped.

"Yeah, why?" asked Fuji.

"I um… We talked about things…" Ally flushed, and scratched the back of his head.

"Knowing him, he's got a video, and will probably blackmail you with it," Fuji added.

"What?" Ally choked, "He… He wouldn't do that, would he?"

"I wouldn't hold it against him," answered Ryo, rising from where Leo sat.

"What did you guys talk about, Ally?" asked Fuji.

"I…" Ally looked down at Dakota, and flushed only more, "I don't want to talk about it in front of her… It's those kinds of problems… What in the hell am I gonna do? How could I be that stupid?"

"My boyfriend, my sister, my brother… Yeah, this constitutes as personal," Ryo muttered as she stalked about the room and reached for her gun. She examined it, and shook her head, "This isn't strong enough… I want something that'll blow a damn hole into a wall… Something like… Yukiko's gun…" she quickly ran into Yukiko's room, and emerged with Yuki's combat magnum shoved in the back of her belt.

"Fuji, I'm going out for a little while…" said Ryo as she grabbed a box of bullets.

"Um… I have a feeling it's not out to a Denny's…" Fuji said. "Where are you going, Ryo, and what are you going to do?"

"I'm going to go blow a hole through your cousin's head…" Ryo replied coolly.

"Woah, she's cool!" asked Dakota as she watched Ryo spin the chamber of the gun about once.

"No! No she's not! She's bad!" snapped Max, "Ryo, if you go, I'll have to arrest you!"

"You hypocritical son of a bitch," snarled Ryo. "If you were any sort of cop, you'd have had this figured out by now! Look what they did to your damn partner, if that's all he still is! Look what they did to my sister, and look what he's doing to my brother! And you're no friggin' better, Fujiko! Just sitting on your ass while Leo's practically trying to climb walls and Yukiko's hallucinating! You're both lazy, useless, and only a fifth of your parents legend!"

"I am not my father!" snapped Max.

"Yeah, and that's your problem, Zenigata. You try so hard not to be your old man, you're freakin' turning into him!" snapped Ryo.

"Listen, Ryo-san, we'll get this all sorted out," chuckled Fuji lightly. "Just put down the gun, okay?"

"Fuji, if you're really my friend, let me do this. And if you're my enemy, I won't pause to shoot you," said Ryo. And with that, she stormed out of the hotel room, leaving all stunned in her wake.

"I think she's mad…" said Dakota after a pause.

"There's more to this than she's saying…" Fuji said to herself, "Something's got her really mad…"

The Docks:

Victor Lupin was more than a little surprised when a shot fired, smashed out a window, and nearly made impact with his skull. He looked out, and saw a very angry Asian woman with an olive complexion staring back at him, taking aim on the dock.

"What the hell…" he started, and ducked as another shot fired.

"Come on out, Victor! I've got all day and a box full of bullets!" snapped Ryo as she cocked the magnum and leaned against the hood of the Alfa Romeo, which she had liberated from Fuji, "And you know who my brother is, so you know I'm sure as hell good on my word!"

"Friggin' hell…" Victor threw down the paperwork he had been studying and opened the door to his study room.

"Boss, you want me to take care of this?" asked one lackey in a thick Columbian accent.

"Nah, I'll ice this bitch myself," Victor replied, walking down the hall while he loaded his Walther, cursing as he did so.

"Well, if it isn't my almost in-law… How's my cousin? He and that blonde do one another yet?" Victor asked with amusement.

"Only you'd begin a question like that, Victor," said Ryo with a smirk as she looked up from where he stood at the side of the ship.

"How's Odori-chan?" inquired Victor with a smile.

"Very pregnant," responded Ryo.

"Brave man…" muttered Victor to himself.

"Victor, why don't you come down here? I want to talk with you," Ryo called.

"You look like you want to shoot me, Jigen…"

"You know, whatever comes first," said Ryo with a shrug of the shoulders.

"Heh," Victor gave a small laugh, and jumped off of the ship and onto the dock, landing in front of Ryo with the same smile. "You know, if I weren't blue-eyed, I'd almost look like your fiancé."

"Ex-fiancé," responded Ryo quickly. She raised her gun and glared at Victor, "But that's your fault now, isn't it, Victor? He's not the one who shot that guard, is he?"

"Ryoko Jigen, are you wearing a wire? Don't make me have to search you," Victor chuckled.

"I'm going to feel sorry for the devil when I send you back to hell, you bastard," hissed Ryo.

"What, you're going to kill me?" chuckled Victor, "Since when did anyone in your group kill for revenge?"

Ryo shot, and the bullet grazed Victor in the shoulder, "Since now, jackass."

"God… What the hell Ari sees in you," Victor shook his head and laughed. "It's no wonder the way he is… You want to know the things he said to me, Ryoko-chan? You want to know what your dear little brother said to me? Tough boy Allen Jigen…." Victor laughed, "You should hear what they told me! It's priceless… They both brought you up, by the way…. Do you want to know what they said about you? Your brother was quite kind, but Leo was simply confused…"

"Do you have an off switch somewhere?" snapped Ryo.

"Why? Do you want to see it?" Victor asked with a sneer. He raised his gun and shot, but Ryo quickly ducked and rolled out of the way, and shot again. Both were more than surprised when she hit a gasoline tank, and it burst into flames.

"Damn it! That's half of my supply, you bitch!" growled Victor as he looked at half of the ship submerge into thick flames, "You bitch!"

"Heh, it's about time someone showed you your place, you damn misogynist..."

"You think you're funny, neh? Well, we'll see how funny you think this is…" he threw several metallic balls, and Ryo quickly ducked before they exploded.

"Full of tricks, aren't you, Mister Magician?" smiled Ryo as she surveyed the explosions.

"Victor Lupin!" both looked upward.

"Who's that?" Ryo asked as she noticed he too had a gun pointed at Victor.

"That'd be the ships captain," Victor gulped dryly.

"You damn fraud!" shouted the captain, "There's nothing in those crates! What did you do with the supply?"

"What? Of course there's something in those crates, you idiots! Now go get it from the flames!" shouted Victor.

"I should be throwing you into those flames!" growled the captain. He shot from his machine gun, and both Ryo and Victor took off running. Ryo threw herself into the Romeo, and started it up, shooting back at the captain as the zoomed off. She shot at another fuel tank, and the rest of the ships went in flames.

"Well, there are a million ways that that could've been better…" mumble Ryo as she threw her gun down on the passenger seat. She continued to zoom down the ever-busying streets, ducking other cars and cleverly weaving through rush hour traffic. It caught her attention at one point that there was someone in the back seat reaching for her gun. She quickly brought the car to a halt, grabbed the gun, and pointed it to the stowaway, who proved to be none other than Victor Lupin. Victor was clutching to his chest, and looked very pale. Ryo then noticed he had been shot.

Ryo started the car up once again, and sighed, "Victor, I don't know why I'm doing this… I shouldn't be… But I want to be the one to kill you… So that's why I'm doing this… Don't think I'm doing this out of the kindness of my heart, because I'm not," she pulled into a hospital, and helped Victor out of the car, her own outfit becoming stained with blood as she led him in.

"Why… Why are you…" Victor choked.

"I explained it already, idiot, so don't make me again… I'm having a hard enough justifying it my friggin' self… Now save your breath," grumbled Ryo. "Nurse! Nurse!" she called. The nurse quickly ran up, and Victor was carried away on a stretcher.

"What's his name, ma'am, and how are you related?" inquired another nurse.

"His name's Remy Rupan," replied Ryo quickly. She had prepared for this, "I'm an acquaintance…"

"Are you going to be staying with Mister Rupan?" inquired the nurse.

"No, I've got to get home," Ryo shook her head in response.

"Could I have your name, please?"

"Diana. Diana Ming," she answered, and left the hospital, still soaked in blood.

Ryo returned late in the evening, and there were more than a few questions as to why she was covered in blood, the full box of bullets she had gone with was only half full, why a huge Columbian cargo ship had been reduced to flames, and why Victor Lupin was in the hospital.

"I need a drink," was Ryo's only tired answer. She then went silently into her room, and took a shower. She threw away the clothes covered in blood, and had to wash off each of her thirty-six bracelets.

"Ryo?" she heard, and shot her head up at the sound of her name. Leo was in the doorway, leaning against it tiredly.

"Leo!" Ryo gasped, and led him to a chair, "How are you feeling?"

"Finally on this planet… I've been throwing up for hours," Leo answered. "Max and Fuji have been good caretakers, though. And Heiji's been making soup left and right."

"I'm glad you're okay… I was worried about you," said Ryo with concern as she laid a hand upon his face. "Your fever's gone down."

"That's good," Leo nodded.

"Hey, you aren't blushing when you're talking to me!"

"Victor's a bastard, but he can really make sense," Leo answered with a shrug. "I'm not cured, I know… But I'm better…"

"What did you two talk about?" asked Ryo as she resumed polishing her bracelets.

"My serious relationship problems," answered Leo.

"Hm… That it?"

"That's all you're getting," replied Leo with a yawn. "I'm tired… I'm gonna go home… I just wanted to say thanks…"

"For what?"

"For being there," Leo shrugged, rose, and stumbled out of her room. He would have to find Max. He could she Dakota was having enough fun of her own—Heiji, Toshiro and Ally were in the kitchen together, and she had been allowed to help. Leo could tell that she had developed a crush on the three from her time being there.

"Surfer Heiji, bad-boy Ally and city boy Toshiro… Yeah, I guess that's the dream of a lot of girls her age," mumbled Leo as he seated himself on the couch. "Aw… My friggin' head…" he rolled over and grumbled.

Max was with Fuji outside on a balcony, still trying to sink in what she had told him.

"Dead?" Max yelped.

"Yep. They found his body Thursday," answered Fuji with a nod. "You want a cigarette?"

"Not really, but I think I need it now," Max muttered, taking the lit cigarette from her shakily. "Now what?"

"I have no clue. How in the hell are you supposed to tell a kid that her dad was murdered!" asked Fuji.

"I'll have to tell Leo… As soon as he's better, though," Max nodded numbly.

"Leo's got enough stress right now," replied Fuji. "Ah, what a twisted web we weave, neh?"

"You can freakin' say that again," Max snorted.

"Ah, what a—"

"I didn't mean literally!" snapped Max, "I've got to get home…"

"Are you going to be okay?" asked Fuji.

"Nope," Max shook his head, and walked out to the living quarters. "Dakota, Leo… Come on, let's go!"

"All right," Dakota sighed. "Bye, guys!"

"Bye!" the three men answered, and Heiji gave a small laugh as she exited.

"I think she was checking you guys out," Heiji laughed.

"Heh, hey, you weren't saved that, either," muttered Ally.

Fuji smiled as she strode in, and slapped Heiji from behind as she walked over to him, "So, what's cooking?"

"Heh heh… Nothing as long as you're here," Heiji answered, nudging Fuji out of the kitchen with a spatula.

"Ah… Heiji-chan, you're no fun sometimes!" muttered Fuji in a whine.

A Few Days Later:

Ryo was awoken by a knocking on her door. She yawned, and stretched, and threw on her bathrobe before approaching the door. She opened it, and was shocked to see Victor Lupin standing in the doorway, holding a package.

"What are these?" asked Ryo curiously as she took the box.

"The videos," Victor responded, clearing his throat. "I'm not doing this out of the goodness of my heart, Ryoko… I'm doing it because you saved my life, and I don't want to remain indebted to you for the rest of my life."

"Heh…." Ryo laughed and shook her head, "You destroyed my entire life, and this is supposed to make me feel better?"

"No," Victor shook his head. "We've even now, Jigen. I don't want to be bothered by you, any longer."

"Only if you retire, and promise you'll leave everyone alone," said Ryo firmly.

"Hm… I can't do that, and you know that… So I suppose I'll be seeing you around, after all," Victor smirked, and hobbled down the hall.

"I could've shot him…" Ryo said to herself as she closed the door. She couldn't though, and she knew why. When she had seen him in the back of the Alfa Romeo, he had looked exactly like Ari. And it was impossible for her to hurt Ari…

"Fujiko!" a loud growl suddenly awoke the entire floor of the small motel, which was taken up entirely by the Lupin gang.

"What the hell was that?" asked Yukiko as she leaned against the doorway, still weak from her drug trip.

"That sounded like my sister…" answered Toshiro with worry as he also rose from the bed and opened the door to the hotel room.

"I'm gonna be sick!" Yukiko moaned, and quickly ran from the doorway. Toshiro watched her run to the bathroom with great concern. The vomiting spells should've passed days ago. Now something totally different was making her sick, and he had an inkling as to what it was. He just didn't want to admit it.

"Flintstone vitamins! Your important cargo was a bottle of nutrition supplements shaped in the likeness of a cartoon?" Odori growled as she pounded upon Fuji's door.

"Hee hee…" Fuji laughed from the other side, "Dori-chan, how could you?"

"How could I fall so easily for one of your tricks? I'm not sure, the reason escapes even me!" Odori growled.

"No I mean, there was a great treasure in there, and you let it get away! Dori, I'm surprised!" gasped Fuji.

"My ass! You're full of crap, Lupin!" Odori yelled, "You get out here, now, and face my blade!"

"Eh, rather not, Dori!" Fuji responded.

"Odori, you get to bed before I lock you in your room! You need sleep!" shouted Heiji.

"All of you need to just shut up before I start on you all!" Ally shouted from his room.

"Ah, what a beautiful night…" muttered Ryo, rolling her eyes and slowly closing her door.

Leo's Apartment:

"Well, you want to go in there?" asked Leo as he sipped his coffee with Max at the kitchen table.

"I think we should go together," Max nodded after a pause. "I can't do this alone, and I know you wouldn't be able to, either, LeBlanc…:

"We can't put this off forever," Leo sighed, and rose.

"Listen, um, I don't mean anything by this, but, I um…" Max rose and grasped onto Leo's hand tightly, "I just… I'm nervous about this…."

"Yeah, me, too…" Leo admitted, and both walked into Leo's room. Dakota was there, watching television blankly. Leo curled up next to her on the bed, and Max seated himself on the edge of it.

"Um, Dakota, why don't you turn that off a second, sweetey? We…. We all need to talk…" Leo reached over and turned off the television, and looked up at him questioningly, and then at Max.

"What's going on, guys?" asked Dakota, "Did they find my dad?" a smile grew on her face, and she laughed, "Oh, no, where'd they have to bail him out of now?"

"I… I got a report from Lupin, and ICPO had information on it, too," Max cleared his throat, and avoided eye contact with the young girl.

"Dakota they… They found your dad, but, um…" Leo paused, "He… He's gone for a long time, Honey…"

"What?" Dakota's smile fell, "Did Interpol catch him? Wait, can't you two bust him out?"

"No," Leo shook his head, "We'd do it if he were. We both would jump through as many hoops as possible to do that for you, you know that! But… He's gone…"

"Gone? You keep saying that? Where's he gone to?" Dakota asked Leo. She looked over at Zenigata, "Max, where's he gone?"

"He's… He's in a very good place, Dakota…" Max responded.

"What….? No… You… You mean he's… No!" she ran to the door, but Max quickly caught onto her and embraced her. Leo walked over and seated himself next to the two.

"It's okay… It's okay… Get it all out, Dakota… It's all right…" Leo said in a whisper.

"What are they going to do with me?" Dakota wept, "No one will take me! They all hate me! My mommy's in a coma! My daddy's gone, and they're going to put me in one of those stupid orphanages! I know it! That's just like them! They'll do it! They hate us!"

"Not if we have anything to do about it," Leo shook his head, and brushed some of Dakota's black hair back. "I can't do it, because all of my information's forged, but I already talked with Max about it…"

"About what?" Dakota sniffed.

"Well, if you want, you can stay with Leo's parents, and I'll adopt you…. I know you hate me, but, would you like that?" asked Max.

"You two are going to be my parents now?" Dakota inquired.

"Yeah. If you want us to," Leo replied, wiping away a few of her tears with his hand.

"Yeah… Yeah, I'd like that," she responded, clinging onto Max tighter. "Thank you…"


	7. Blue Hawaii

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Lupin III…. What, you want something witty? Jeeze… I'll bet I just crushed someone's hopes by not putting anything witty… I'll go to my corner now…

Ahola!

There's a special reason why this greeting in particular was used. Read-on and find out. Sorry once again if this is coming late, but I've just had a lot of unavoidable things happy recently which keeps me away from my favorite hobby. Well, as always, I hope you enjoy this chapter—Lord knows it took long enough to write! Look for the special cameos, bwahahahaha…. Please review if you wish, and I will see everyone around later!

Fun Fact of Boredom: Well, there's another reason to have Beatles lyrics at the beginning of every chapter… It turns out that the guy who did the music for Lupin (yes, including the beginning theme) Yuji Ohno, is none other than the brother of Yoko Ono, widow of Beatle John Lennon. That's kind of creepily coincidental O.o.

_'I need to laugh, and when the sun is out,  
I've got something I can laugh about.  
I feel good in a special way,  
I'm in love, and it's sunny day_._'_

—The Beatles, _'Good Day Sunshine'_

Chapter Seven

A Few Weeks Later: Blue Hawaii

A Mansion in France:

"Oh my… Isn't she adorable?" Fujiko gasped as she laid eyes upon Dakota. Lupin simply rolled his eyes, shrugged and then exchanged glances with Leo and Max, who stood in the hall behind Dakota, who Fujiko found quite intriguing.

"Yeah, it'll be good having a kid around the house! Jeeze, I remember when you two were both her height! Max, you were trying set the cat on fire, and you were stealing lobsters from the local fishing docks, Ari," said Lupin with a smile of reminiscence.

"Would you like to see where you'll be staying, Dakota?" asked Fujiko, taking her by the hand.

"I'd like it if you called me Dako, Mrs. Lupin," Dakota replied.

"And I'd like it if you called me Fujiko, Dako," said Fujiko with a smile. "I don't like Mrs. Lupin very much…"

"Hey!" snapped Lupin. Fujiko chuckled, and led Dakota up the stairs to her room. Lupin's frown turned to a smile once more, and he looked to Max, "Zenigata, congratulations on becoming a dad! The childbirth must've been hell, though!"

"You may have graying hair, Mr. Lupin, but your sense of humor is as fresh as ever," replied Max with a knowing smile.

"Eh… You're cute, Kid," Lupin looked over his reading glasses at Max, and was clearly not amused by this. "I've got to talk to my son for a little, Max, but I hope you don't mind…"

"Not at all," Max shook his head, and exited out of the house. "I'll be in the car, LeBlanc!"

"Fine, I'll see you there, Max!" Leo called as Max exited the household. "I'm kind of glad he left… I wanted to talk to you about something…"

"Thank God!" sighed Lupin, slapping his forehead, "I didn't want to have to be the one to start this conversation… You want to sit in the library?"

"I can't keep Max too long…" said Leo, pointing over his shoulder to the front door. "He scares me when he starts playing with the buttons on his car…."

"This won't be long… I promise…" said Lupin. He led Leo into the library, closing the door behind him, "I'm glad you know… I didn't want Blondie finding out about this…"

"About what? I think we were going to talk about a couple of completely different things, Dad…" said Leo.

"I need you both to disappear for a few weeks," said Lupin sternly.

"Disappear? Why the hell would I do that? Fuji's in Hawaii!" snapped Leo.

"Because there's a hit out for your good ole' buddy, Zenigata," answered Lupin. "Jigen gave me the info, so you know it's as good as gold, Ari…"

"A hit? From who? Why?" snapped Leo frantically.

"Max is, well…. He's bi, isn't he?" sighed Lupin.

"Dad! What does—"

"It has everything to do with it, Arséne!" snapped Lupin, who seemed more grave than usual about this. "Jacob Aurel. His name ring a bell? He's a Romanian businessman with a wife and kids… His wife is the one who put a hit out on Zenigata!"

"Jesus, Max!" Leo moaned, and slapped his forehead, "What in the hell did you do this time!"

"Not just him… Him and Jake… His father doesn't know, and thank God for it! It'd probably do the old man in!" Lupin continued, "Now I've got a couple of tickets to Jerusalem. You'll be staying with a few of Natasha's relatives…" Lupin rose, crossed the room, and removed an envelope from a book. "I don't want to see you outside of that city until I give you the go ahead. You're Zenigata's only friend, it seems, so you're just as likely a target…"

"What? I've got a job! You know I can take on anyone that comes in my way!" snapped Leo. "Max can, too! He doesn't look like it, but he can really kick someone's ass when he wants!"

"Leo, Ari, whatever I have to call you to get this through your thick Eurasian skull—Stay away," said Lupin firmly. The gentleman thief smiled, and reclined in his seat, "Now, what'd you have to tell me?"

"I don't want you teaching Dakota any tricks. I don't want to come back to find out she knows how to pick a lock, crack a safe, drive a car, make a mask—I don't even want to see where you've taught her a card trick, or how to pull a rabbit out of a hat," said Leo firmly. "All right?"

"All right… But that's a huge untapped resource you're telling me not to touch, Leo," sighed Lupin. "Her dad was the best thief in American… Almost competition for yours truly!"

"She's not a resource, she's… I guess she's your granddaughter," Leo shrugged.

"Great…. Dako Zenigata, granddaughter of Lupin III and former Inspector Zenigata… I think I just heard my father laughing in hell…" muttered Lupin. "Why does she want to go by that, anyway?"

"Sometimes people want to change, and that includes a name change," responded Leo with a shrug and without any irony in his tone to his own past experiences. "I let her get a haircut, too, and she's dyed her hair brown and gotten her ears pierced. I can't say I'm for a little girl doing that, but if it helps the grieving process, I'm all for it…"

"Speaking of hair dye, does this mean I shouldn't let Ming around the her, either? You may come home with a blue-haired kid!" laughed Lupin.

"Why? Are they visiting?" asked Leo.

"Ming, get the damn dog!" yelled Jigen in the living room.

"I would if I weren't carrying Mako!" Ming replied.

"Well, I've got Yoko!" snapped Jigen in response.

"Heh…" Lupin sighed at the sound of two small girls arguing, and their parents arguing above this, "Looks like the Calvary's here…" mumbled Lupin with a roll of the eyes, "I'll see you later, Dad, bye!"

"Yeah… Bye…" Lupin waved dimly as Leo exited. "Be careful… And for God's sakes don't be as stupid as I was at your age… In other words, please don't turn into Fuji…" he moaned.

A Hawaiian Beach:

"YEA!" Heiji called as he caught hold of a large wave and soon disappeared under it.

"Anyong," said the vendor who sold Odori her snow cone.

Odori blinked a few times in surprise, but nodded her head, and exchanged this Korean word for 'hello'. She took the lime-flavored snow cone, and walked back over to the shaded table where Yukiko and Ryo sat.

"The people here are too damn friendly…" Odori muttered suspiciously.

"I don't know, I kind of like it… A lot of fresh air!" said Yukiko with a small smirk from beneath her fedora, which she wore along with her white two-piece bathing suit.

"Fresh air? You?" Ryo chuckled, "You… You're kidding, right? Fresh air goes with you like oil and vinegar, Yuki… What's up with you?"

"Eh, I don't know," Yukiko shrugged.

"Hey, there's Fuji…" said Odori as she bit into her snow cone.

"Heh…That looks good, Dori… I'll be back," Yukiko rose, and walked over to the vendor. Odori and Ryo exchanged questioning glances until Yukiko arrived once again, now with a snow cone in hand.

"Yukiko… You hate limes…" muttered Ryo, "A lot…"

"Eh, I'm not sure… First whole week without smokes, and things just taste different," Yukiko answered with a shrug. "I feel almost bad for putting dad through this hell, though… Thank God for nicotine patches…"

"Hey, Heiji-chan, could you teach me?" inquired Fuji as she walked over to the beached Heiji, who was re-strapping his foot to the surfboard.

"Eh, sure, c'mon!" Heiji nodded to her, "Climb on!" Fuji nodded, and kneeled upon the front of the board while Heiji paddled out with his hands, "Okay, now, hold on for dear life, okay?"

"Why?" asked Fuji, "Why should I hold on for dear life?" She watched and held her balance as Heiji rose, and immediately dug her nails deeper into the board when she got the first feel of a wave. She yelled with terror as Heiji caught hold of a large wave, and both disappeared beneath the waves.

"That's your idea of fun?" Fuji choked as she stumbled onto land, her long black hair completely covering her face.

"Yeah, wasn't it great?" Heiji shouted, slapping her on the shoulders and walking past her. Ryo noticed deep nail marks in Heiji's board as the young Ishikawa passed; nail marks from Fuji.

"He spent too many years in front of that damn computer… It fried his brain," coughed Fuji, wiping her wet hair away from her face. "Where's Ally?"

"Fishing," answered Odori, nodding out to a small boat upon the sea.

Ally was out in a small boat sitting quietly, and one eye opened as there as his bob nodded in the ocean water. A smile grew upon his face, and he rose, "All right! Come on to Ally, kiddo!"

He struggled with the fish, and let out a triumphant call when he brought it aboard. This quickly turned to horror when the shark upon the ground of the boat went to bite him. Ally jumped up in his chair and went to shoot it, but before he could fire a sword was sticking out of the neck of the animal. He looked upward at Toshiro, who had come aboard with him. Toshiro pulled the sword from the animal, and flicked the sword of its blood, "That blood landed in the water, so ya oughta get more sharks… They can smell it for miles…" Toshiro explained.

"Heh, well, Toshiro, after three years it's good to know that there's a use for you…" Ally laughed as he went back to his fishing.

"I'll skin this," Toshiro added, dragging the shark into the back of the boat and putting on a special pair of gloves as to not be injured by the sandpaper-like skin.

"Hey, uh, save the teeth, okay? I want to use those…"

"Jewelry for Carmen?"

"Eh…"

"Odori works well with metal… I could even work it into something nice, if you wanted," said Toshiro.

"Well, okay…" Ally leaned back in his chair, "Why the hell did you want to come out here with me in the first place?"

"Because Yukiko made me…" answered Toshiro.

"What? You're kidding me! She made me come out here with you! I didn't want you anywhere near a boat with me in it!"

"Why's that?"

"You know as well as I do that women are bad luck on ships," chuckled Ally.

Toshiro gave a calm questioning glance, and opened up the cooler when Jigen had his back turned to him. He found a small Styrofoam bowl—exactly what he wanted. He opened it, and smiled. It was childish, but after a crack like that, he wasn't above putting worms in Ally's drink.

"Gh-What, what the hell?" Ally choked as he took a sip of the crawling concoction. He looked into it, and glared back at Toshiro, "You bastard!"

"I'd have a witty comeback if you technically weren't right, Ally," replied Toshiro with a shrug. "Let's face it—You, Ryoko, Odori and Max are the only non-bastards out of all of us!"

"You forgot Heiji, dumbass!" growled Ally as he continued to spit out his drink.

"Heiji was sick when he was born, but he wasn't premature," explained Toshiro.

"Add that to the list of things I don't want to know about your family…" mumbled Ally. "This crap tastes worse than Mountain Dew!"

"God… That almost makes me feel sorry for you, Ally," said Toshiro.

"I'm gonna hurt you… You better hope to God that you're a light sleeper!" hissed Ally darkly.

While this went on the one end of the beach, two men walked down the opposite edge of Hawaiian beach where Lupin was staying, one miserable from the heat and the other confused as to what he was doing in Hawaii in the first place.

"So… Lupin's here, right?" asked Max once again.

"Why else would I come here?" Leo sighed in response. "I think we're the only guys I've ever seen who wear suits to the beach…"

"Well, we could go swimming afterwards if it'll make you feel better… Crap, I thought I was the cranky one out of us…"

Leo sighed, and stopped, "Sorry… I've just got a lot on my mind right now… I'm starting to think we shouldn't have come here…"

"Heh, yeah, I'm sort of getting the creeps… It's like we're being watched…." Max mumbled.

A Beach House Upon a Mountainside, a few hundred yards away:

"I hope you know that Ming was probably the pissiest I've seen her when you drug me here, leaving her with the twins!" snapped Jigen angrily as he sat next to Lupin the Third, who surveyed Leo and Max from inside the beach home.

"And Amaya was less than thrilled that I rode on an airplane… I need to be careful about those things, Lupin," said Goemon.

Jigen turned to Goemon, "Jesus you've turned into a hypochondriac!"

"And you've turned into a cranky old man, Jigen," snapped Goemon.

"Old? I've got a set of toddlers at home, what does that say to you about old?" asked Jigen.

"Fine then. Old and careless," said Goemon coolly as he burnished a sword he had forged when his children were still little. It was called Ryusei, and although it wasn't as nearly as renowned as Zantetsu, it was almost as strong.

"Careless? You—"

"Would both of you two quiet it for second? It's just like the old days… You two complaining about your wives… You've become so whipped, it's not even funny!"

"Heh, I'm not the one who got the vasectomy," Jigen retorted. "So how are our two little inspectors, neh? Playing beach blanket make-out, yet?"

"Cute… I hope you know that my son's perfectly straight!" snapped Lupin, looking away from his binoculars.

"Lupin, we must all come to realizations. I realized long ago that my children did not exactly turn out how I imagined…"

"Yeah, Odori may be adopted, but she's a pregnant version of you…" Jigen answered.

"Hm… True… And when Toshiro moved to America, certainly I was a little…. Stunned… But we must all overcome."

"You know, I'm really surprised you didn't go having a heart attack when you found out you were going to be a grandpa, Goemon," said Jigen.

"Hm, who says I almost didn't? Each of my meals consisted with an Aspirin chaser for a month," Goemon said with a sigh.

"I can't concentrate with you two around…." Lupin shook his head as he watched Leo and Max.

"Then why the hell did you bring us here in the first place?" snapped Jigen.

"Because I needed it… I've been subpoenaed by the nation of Great Britain, and it's got nothing to do with stealing…" muttered Lupin.

"Does it have something to do with Remy?" inquired Goemon, "Because I have children which study there now, and they'll quickly take care of the trouble…"

"Goemon, believe, I wish it was," sighed Lupin. "Ari, how did I know you were going to be here? How did I know you weren't going to listen to me?"

"Because none of your family listens to you?" Jigen responded with a chuckle.

"Don't remind me…" Lupin mumbled.

"So, what's going on outside? I've got thirty percent vision in one eye, seventy in the other… Gimme a play by play, will ya?"

"Well, there's this really hot girl in a bikini… Heh, way to make an old man feel young, hee hee hee!" chuckled Lupin.

"Perv…" Jigen mumbled, rolling his eyes.

"That hot girl is Ryoko," said Goemon.

"WHAT?" Jigen removed his fedora, and repeatedly beat Lupin over the head with it, "You Goddamn perverted son of a—"

"Woah, Jigen, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, okay?" Lupin shouted, "Quit it, there's a gun in your hat, and it hurts like a bitch!"

"You sick bastard…." growled Jigen when he finally calmed.

"Me, the sick one? By the time Ming was in kindergarten, you were killing and boozing away!" responded Lupin.

"Hm, there's some action going on, if you two would quite arguing long enough to look…" said Goemon.

"Huh?" both turned their heads, and looked to see that Max had seated himself upon the sand, and was looking out at the ocean.

"It used to look a lot like this in the beaches in California…" said Max as he looked out over the ocean.

"Yeah, it looked like this in Japan, too," Leo admitted as he stood next to Max. He sighed, and looked down at his partner. "Jacob's wife put a hit out on you…"

"What?" Max choked, and looked up at Leo with disbelief.

"Yeah… She's, she's pretty mad at you Zenigata…" Leo continued, and seated himself next to Max. "That's what my dad had to tell me that night… Damn it, why can't I lie every once in a while?" he growled, slamming his fist onto the ground. "He wanted me to go to Jerusalem with you, and hide out for a little while…"

"Why'd we come here, then?" inquired Max.

"I… I don't know…" Leo shook his head, "I guess this is my way of being impulsive… Listen, Zenigata… I know you would've wanted this, anyway…."

"You don't know as much as you do about me," hissed Max, narrowing his eyes at Leo. "You should've told me about this… I would've been able to keep a closer watch… You're as likely a target as I am!"

"Why does everyone keep saying that?" mumbled Leo under his breath.

"Wow… Trouble in paradise…." Jigen could hear the bickering of the two from the opened window above.

"Shush!" Lupin glared and nudged him sharply in the ribs, and then once again turned his attention to the two. His attention soon was turned to someone off in a much longer distance… Someone with a gun…

"Jigen, gimme a paper and pencil… Goemon, gimme your sword!" Lupin demanded.

"Eh, here," Jigen passed Lupin the two items to Lupin. Lupin quickly scribbled upon the paper, and grabbed Goemon's sword out of his hands before he could protest. Lupin threw the sword much in the fashion of a javelin, and Max fainted when the sword landed in between himself and Leo.

"What the hell?" Leo ripped the note off, quickly read it, and went into action. He hid the sword beneath the blanket, and climbed atop Zenigata, "Oh my God… I can't believe I'm doing this…" he moaned, and leaned down, "Please don't wake up, please don't wake up!" He took a deep breath, and kissed his partner.

"Hey," the assassin meant for Max nudged Leo's shin with his shoe. "You seen this guy around?"

"Would you excuse me?" Leo snapped in a heavily American-accented voice, "We're on our honeymoon here!"

"Wha?" the assassin looked down at the feet of the person beneath Leo, and noticed the men's clothing. The assassin found this too bizarre to interrupt any longer.

Leo resumed this act with Zenigata, and soon became aware of a pair of hands on his shoulders. He was soon the one on the blanket, and Max on top. Leo pushed Max away, and a look of horror was now written across LeBlanc's features.

"Wha…" Max fell back in shock, "Leo… I…"

"WHAT THE FRICKIN' HELL?" Lupin shrieked from the beach house. This was followed by a loud thud, and a curse from Jigen.

"We have to go return something to Goemon, Max," Leo picked up the sword from beneath the blanket and wiped his hand with his sleeve as he walked towards the beach house, his sword slung over his shoulder. Max slowly rose, and silently followed Leo.

"Eh, how's my dad, guys?" Leo asked with worry as he walked into the house and found Lupin on the couch, Jigen fanning off the older thief with his fedora.

"Out like a friggin' light…" Jigen muttered, slapping Lupin a few times on the face.

"Here, Goemon, think fast!" Leo tossed Goemon his sword, and Goemon quickly caught this, and sheaved the blade.

"I never suspected shonen-ai (boyXboy love) in the Lupin family…." Goemon admitted.

"Heh, I don't think Lupin did, either," said Jigen with a wry chuckle.

"Here," Max lifted a glass of water from the table and splashed it on Lupin's face. Lupin came to slowly, and he muttered something inaudible as he laid eyes on his son and Zenigata.

"What did he say?" asked Goemon.

"Eh, I can't repeat that… That's a dirty word, even by my low standards…" Jigen answered.

"Ugh… I'm fine, guys, don't worry…" Lupin rose, and spat out some of the water which had been thrown onto his face. "You two are safe, right?"

"Yeah," Leo nodded. "Dad, what in the hell are you doing here?"

"Eh, I asked Amaya to break into your computer and see when your flight left…" Lupin shrugged.

"You stalked me?" Leo shrieked.

"Well, don't you think that kinda came in handy?" Lupin snorted, "I just saved you both from imminent death, and you thank me be screaming at me? Nice, Ari, nice…"

"Eh, you wanna go get a drink?" Jigen asked Goemon quietly.

"M-hmuh," Goemon nodded.

"Me too," Max's eyes darted from the tense scene between Leo and his father and Goemon and Jigen, who were standing in front of him. "Do you guys have any Captain Morgan and Coke?"

"How did they think you were straight?" Jigen inquired. Max gave a small laugh, and vanished into the kitchen with Goemon and Jigen.

"Thanks for the backup, partner," grumbled Leo. He folded his arms, and seated himself on a coffee table in front of his father. "You overreacted…. You knew that I didn't mean anything…."

"I… Listen, how would've you reacted, huh?" asked Lupin.

"Heh, you tell me… You're the one who married a guy…." Leo muttered absently.

"How'd you know that?" asked Lupin with a great deal of surprise.

"Mom told me," replied Leo quickly.

"Okay, I'm sorry about the screaming like a girl, but I'm not sorry about following you. I know you better than you think, Kiddo. Don't forget where your genes come from."

"My jeans?" Leo raised his eyebrows, "Saks. The shirt's from Macy's."

Lupin looked appalled at this, "You… You shop retail?"

"Um, yeah… Not exactly making the big bucks chasing Fuji all around. I now know why Zenigata ate only Ramen; it's less than a quarter of a Euro per meal!"

"Well, at least you don't shop at WalMart, so you're not a total loss," Lupin rubbed his forehead, and rose. "You and Max are heading for the first flight to Jerusalem in the morning, and we're going to escort you there, personally."

"Heh, you try," Leo winked, and rose. "You want to grab a drink, Dad? You need it…"

"Well, we don't see eye to eye on a lot, but I agree with you on that one," Lupin shakily rose from the couch, and walked out of the room with Leo. They opened the door to the kitchen, and found Max, Jigen and Goemon seated at the kitchen table, each drinking their own individual drinks.

"So, you said his name was Collin?" Max repeated.

"Yes," Goemon shuddered. "Collin Gilmour…"

"Holy… Oh, wow, that's awkward…" Max muttered, and took another sip of his rum and cola.

"What?" inquired Goemon.

"Blind date a few years ago, I get set up with some widower who's a lot older than me… I don't like dating anyone older than me, but, you know, I humored the guy…" Max trailed off. "Crap! I can't have just a normal date… It's always someone who's friggin' connected to the family!"

Jigen laughed loudly and nearly fell back in his seats, "Jesus am I glad I had enough sense to not date, period!"

"What do you call Ming, then, Jigen?" inquired Goemon.

"A one night stand that's last almost twenty five years…" Jigen muttered, taking another sip of his drink.

"So, you two are going to go to Jerusalem, no fights, no me stalking you halfway across the world?" Lupin asked Leo hopefully.

"Yeah," Leo nodded. "How did you know to check the flight times, anyway?"

"I knew you weren't going to listen," Lupin shrugged. "I never did!" He followed with a long laugh, and Max noted the pained expression upon Leo's face. He would definitely have to talk with Leo later that night.

Later that Night, a thatched-roof restaurant:

"What the hell are you doing?" Yukiko wondered as she watched Toshiro sketch and made notes upon a notepad. She looked back up at the dancers, and down at his notepad again with interest.

"Taking notes… We thought about doing a Polynesian theme at the theater," Toshiro responded. "Their costumes are terrific, don't you think?"

Yukiko smirked, rolled her eyes, and scruffed his hair, "To think, I'm in a relationship where the guy likes to look at clothes more than I do!"

Fuji wore a Cheshire Cat smile as she sat between Ryo and Heiji, "I always thought this place was just full of coconuts and hula skirts… But apparently it's full of cute natives, too!" she giggled happily.

"Here you go," one waiter moved along their table, placing leis about their necks as he moved along.

"Hee hee… Getting leid here is pretty damn easy, too," Fuji chuckled.

"Perv," Ryo said tiredly.

"This looks so much like Kabuki!" said Toshiro to himself with amazement, "Without the twenty tons of makeup!"

"I know you've got pigeons, but ya ever think about another hobby?" Yukiko asked.

"Hey, he's back!" Fuji's eyes shifted to two Hawaiian women, younger than herself, and she gave a frown of curiosity as they approached Heiji.

"Mari, Lara, how are you guys?" asked Heiji as the two approached him.

"Terrific!" the shorter one, Mari, answered. "Lara and I are going to the local college here!"

"Wow, really? Have you guys decided on majors, yet?" Heiji inquired with sincere interest.

"Electrical engineering," answered Lara.

"And I'm between becoming a programmer or a computer tech," added Mari. "Well, we didn't want to bother you, so we'll see you around Professor Ikeda."

"See ya, girls!" Heiji waved good-bye, and then faced the stunned looks of his family and friends.

"Who… Who were they?" asked Fuji.

"Two girls I tutored while I was on sabbatical… You can't keep an active mind down for long… Those two weren't even thinking of college before I started giving them math and computer tech lessons… And it was a fair trade-off…."

"What'd they give you?" asked Fuji with a quick snap.

"They taught me how to surf," Heiji responded. "What were you thinking? They're like four years younger than me, Fuji! I don't even like younger women that way!"

"So you'll go older?" asked Fuji hopefully.

"I mean that in a mental sense as well as in a physical sense," responded Heiji, sipping his drink calmly.

"Hmph," Fuji crossed her arms and sat back in her chair. Thieving was her best ability, and acting spoiled was her second best. Karaoke placed third.

"Huh, would you look at this…" Ryo muttered as she looked through a travel brochure she had acquired in the airport. "An ancient treasure…"

"Huh?" Fuji nearly fell out of her chair, and her smile returned, "Treasure?"

"Uh-oh… Ryo said the T-word…" mumbled Odori. She glared down at her empty plate, and yelled to a waiter, "Whose thumbs do I have to cut off to get some more fried SPAM? It's supposedly a bottomless plate, and I can see the bottom of my plate!"

"Where is it, Ryo-san?" Fuji asked excitedly, leaning closer to Ryo.

"Well, it's actually at an old plantation…" muttered Ryo, "You're not gonna believe this, though…"

"What?"

"It's haunted," Ryo chuckled.

"….You're right, I don't believe it! Let's get going!" Fuji rose from the table excitedly, only to have her jacket pinned to the table by Odori's sword. She turned back around to see a quite annoyed Odori.

"I'm still hungry… Odori said darkly, staring Fuji down seriously.

"O-kay…." Fuji pulled out the sword, passed it to Odori, and slowly slid back in her seat. "We'll eat first, then we'll go look at the haunted house…"

"Very good," Odori gave a small nod of satisfaction, and gave way to a rare smile as she was brought another plate of fried SPAM and eggs done sunny-side up, and Hawaiian classic.


	8. Phantom of Paradise

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Lupin III, but I can dream…

Hey!  
Well, after a long wait, here is the next chapter. Hopefully with Spring Break coming up, more chapters come out quicker…. Is it sad to say I already can't wait for Summer Vacation? Well, it's safe to say that this is the last time I'll ever start a story in the middle of the school year—I haven't been able to update as much as I like due to time constraints… Someone's learned their lesson, that's easy to say…. Well, as always, please give me your thoughts and opinions… I received one review, asking for Veronica back, and although I never thought of that, it could prove interesting…. Thanks!

Fun Fact of Boredom: Ally was added as a Lupin Gang Character last-minute…. The purpose for this being the group would've been much too overrun with girls, and I needed a character who would fit the complete sociopath profile. Originally, Ally only gave help when needed, but mainly stayed with his parents at their shop.

_'They say that everyone  
wants someone.  
So how come no one  
wants me.  
Then they say that everyone  
needs someone.  
So how come no one  
needs me.'_

—The Beatles, _'So How Come No One Loves Me' _(Note-This is one of the more obscure covers the Beatles did, and not man have heard it, because it was made when they did radio shows for the BBC.)

Chapter Six

A Short Time Later: Phantom of Paradise

Jerusalem:

"I think I know where you learned to drive now!" Leo said as he gripped upon the dashboard tightly and tried to hold back his screams. Max made another sharp turn, and Leo continued to hold on for dear life.

"Heh, that's nothing! Just wait until rush hour!" Max laughed. He pulled up to a small household, and Leo nearly fainted upon the ground as he shakily stepped out of the vehicle.

"Who're we staying with, anyway?" Leo inquired as he leaned upon the car, regaining his breath slowly.

"A cousin of my mother," responded Max. He walked up to the household, touching the Torah in the box on the right of the door as he did so, and he rang the doorbell. A few moments later, and a blonde man answered the door, smiled, and embraced Max as he immediately recognized his relative.

"Nice to see you too, Joshua," Max chuckled as he broke out of his distant cousin's grasp.

"Max, it's so wonderful to see you!" exclaimed Joshua, a man who appeared to be slightly younger than his mother, and much younger than his father. He was blonde, just like most of Max's family on his mother's side. "You should visit more, you know…"

"Heh heh… Yeah, I know," Max muttered as he embraced his distant cousin. "I understand you know the circumstances…"

"Yes," Joshua nodded. He looked over Max's shoulder and smiled, "Ah! This must be your friend! Mister…"

"Eh, just Leo, please," Leo responded quickly with a handshake.

"Well, are you two just trying to get some fresh air, or would you actually like to come in? Come on… It's as hot as the devil's frying pan out here!"

"Then why do you stay, Josh?" inquired Max.

"Eh," Joshua shrugged, "It's interesting. I'd get bored anywhere else. Come on, I'll show you both your room…" He led them through the small house, into a guest room, simply decorated, with a closet, bed, dresser, lamp, desk, and rug.

"My daughter used to live with me, but she's off in the military now," said Joshua with slight pride as he adjusted the bed sheets and fluffed the pillows upon the bed.

"Why am I not surprised she went into the military? She always used to beat the crap out of me when we were little…" Max mumbled with a roll of the eyes.

"She's saying you're dating a Catholic now, Max. Is this true?" Joshua inquired with some interest.

"Catholic?" Max looked to his right at Leo. It dawned on him. French population 99 Catholic. He moaned and slapped his forehead, "How in the hell do these rumors get around!"

"Heh…" Joshua gave a small laugh, "Well, I'll let you boys get to unpacking. Help yourselves to whatever you find in the kitchen. I have to get off to work now, but I'll leave you a housekey, Max…"

"Thanks, Josh," Max nodded and laid his suitcase upon the bed, and went to unpacking. "Wow… This is the first time we've been alone without anyone trying to kill us in months, LeBlanc!"

"Nope, they're only trying to kill you…" Leo muttered as he seated himself at the desk and removed a heavy book from his suitcase.

"What are you doing?" asked Max as he looked over Leo's shoulder with wonder.

"Studying," Leo muttered. Leo was more than a little shocked when Max lifted the book from the desk and threw it under the bed, "What the hell did you do that for?"

"You're too high strung, even by my standards," muttered Max in response. "Your ass is going to have a good time tonight and like it!"

"How are you any authority over me?" Leo countered, rising from the desk, "I'm older, taller, and—"

"Have mild hypertension," Max added. "You're going out tonight, LeBlanc…"

"Max, I'm sorry, you're a nice guy, but I have no interest in dating you."

"Why is it if I want to do something with you, you immediately think the only reason I'm doing it is to get in your pants?" Max asked with disgust. "And you wonder why I didn't tell you I was bi for all of those months…"

"Look me in the eyes and tell me I'm wrong," said Leo severely.

Max paused, "You're the one who—"

"As a safety maneuver!" snapped Leo, "I did it to save your damn life! Don't make me regret doing it, Zenigata, please… You're the one who freakin' assaulted me!"

"Te, something you're used to by now, the way you let Cecilia keep you on a leash for over a year and a half…" mumbled Max, leaning against a wall and crossing his arms.

Leo's glared, "You bastard, Zenigata…"

Max was slightly taken aback by this, and blinked once or twice in surprise, "Leo… You know it's true… You let her use you like a box of Kleenex… You're delusional if you deny any of it."

"I finally stood up to her, though! I'm the reason you got your job back!" Leo yelled angrily.

"You're the reason I lost my damn job in the first place!" Max took a step forward, and poked LeBlanc in the chest with his finger, "She threatened to come out about you if I didn't pack my ass up and head out to Eastern Europe—Which may I say is one of the most depressing places I've ever been in my life! I left to protect you!"

Leo sighed, and turned away from Max, "I didn't know that those were the circumstances…."

"Well, they were," said Max sternly. "So ya wanna go out?"

"…Sure," Leo smirked, nodded, and walked out of the tiny room with Max.

Hawaii:

"And rumor has it that this very domain is still haunted by the ghost of an angered Japanese samurai, who was an ancestor of one of the plantation owners!" said the tour guide cheerily as she led her group through the historic dwelling. What she did not know was that her group also contained the infamous Lupin the Fourth gang.

"So, you still think it's a bunch of bull, Fuji?" inquired Ryo in a whisper.

"Yup. Even more so now than usual," Fuji nodded. "This crap about ghosts is all a bunch of BS, and I'll prove it… I just need a ghost…"

"Hey, what if these things really are real, huh? You wouldn't want to piss it off by sayin' that crap, would you?" snapped Yukiko.

"Yuki, you of all people! Please tell me you don't believe in these things!" Ryo said with a small chuckle and roll of the eyes.

"Hey, you never know… All I'm saying is these things aren't good to be playing with…" Yukiko warned as she cautiously walked down the hall, keeping Toshiro close.

"There is nothing to fear here," said Odori reassuringly with a small humoring smirk. There was a croaking noise, and Odori jumped back in horror as she laid eyes upon the frog in the corner of a hall. "Aya! Heiji! Get that thing away!"

"Heh, women…" Heiji mumbled as he picked up the frog and tossed it into a potted plant. "Look, Dori, bad froggy gone now…"

"I'm sure if father were here and you were able to see him on some of his medication, you'd have a similar reaction, Heiji," snapped Odori, folding her arms and scowling at him.

"Hey, could we just enjoy the tour?" Fuji asked tiredly. "Hey, um… Anyone see where our tour guide ran off to?"

"I knew we should've left breadcrumbs," Ryo murmured.

"Odori would've probably eaten the bread before you would've even started…" said Heiji.

"Hey!" Odori snapped as she removed a granola bar from her gi and opened it, "Just because I am with child does not mean I've been eating like a pig!"

"…Riiight…. Heh, well, three ways to go now… Left, right, and straight…" said Fuji.

"How's about back?" asked Ally with a hopeful smile, pointing over his shoulder at the darkened back wall.

"What hallway?" Fuji inquired.

"The one that—" Ally turned a bit, "What the hell? That wasn't there before…"

"In a few moments, it won't be there anymore, again," responded Odori as she finished off the last bit of the granola bar. She unsheathed Zantetsu, and cut through the stone wall. It fell to the ground in a pile of rubble, and Odori sheathed her blade, and stepped over the rocks with a small bound of satisfaction.

"Does she even realize she just defaced a national monument?" inquired Ryo.

"Does she even care?" Fuji snorted, and hopped over the rocks, and allowed Odori to lead. Odori smirked as she came upon another wall, but this time when she went to cut the wall in half, she was horrified to find her sword chipped upon impact. She blinked a few times in horror as she studied the blade, and looked up at the group, "We're screwed…."

"Not yet," Yukiko quickly drew her gun, and fired a few shots. Everyone went running for cover as the bullets ricocheted off of the walls, one bullet in particular smashing open a potted plant Fuji had taken refuge behind.

"It's okay… It's all okay… Those bullets didn't leave a scratch in that damn wall, but we're okay…" Fuji said slowly.

"Hey, does it usually get foggy in Hawaii?" inquired Ally as he noted a gradual buildup of mist within the room.

"Um… Not as long as I've lived here… And it's never been purple…" Heiji muttered.

"Hee hee… Purple haze…" Fuji chuckled. "Ow!" she exclaimed as Ryo smacked her on the back of the head.

"Well, there's a way back out; there's got to be!" said Toshiro as he rose and bounded forward, "Yeouch!"

"Toshiro, what happened!" Yukiko asked worriedly.

"I was walking forward, and I hit a wall… I think I've got a nosebleed…." mumbled Toshiro in a strange, stuffed-up voice.

"Now what?" asked Ryo.

"Who dare disturbs the grave of the great samurai warrior?" inquired a shaky voice suddenly.

Jerusalem:

"Hey, LeBlanc, think fast!" shouted Max.

"Huh?" Leo looked up, and quickly caught the basketball, and began to run down the court, the boys in black uniforms running after the considerably taller Asian. Several cheered as Leo scored a basket, and Max even yet out a small cheer, although he was on a different team.

"Okay, guys, that's enough!" Leo panted in Hebrew to the boys, who let out a groan of dissatisfaction.

"Don't worry, guys, we'll be back!" Max added in one of his native languages to the rabbi-school children. They smiled and cheered in response, and Max gave another small chuckle, and tossed Leo his purple jacket as he picked up his own brown one which he had discarded upon a chain link fence.

"For a guy with asthma, you play a good game," said Max.

"Are you kidding? Each time they went chasing the ball I was sucking on my inhaler like it was the breath of life!" Leo admitted with some embarrassment.

"Well, you're good with kids; that you can't argue," said Max as he walked beside Leo down the city street.

"Yeah… I'd love a couple of them, actually!" Leo admitted.

"That'd involve you getting over that fear of women, first," Max pointed out.

"Well, I could always adopt… There's more than one way to skin a cat, Zenigata!" Leo said cheerily. "We both adopted Dakota, remember! Well, you did, but I like to think of myself as her father, too…"

"Hm… I want to take a trip, all right?" Max asked.

"Yeah, sure… Hey, I'm getting the grand tour!" Leo chirped.

"Boy you're in a good mood…" Max mumbled.

"I don't know… Maybe it's the air…" Leo shrugged.

"Well, come on, I'll drive," Max said as they walked to their rental car. Max drove Leo to a large wall, where many people stood outside of it.

"It's called the Wailing Wall… It's the only wall left of an ancient synagogue…" Max explained as he led Leo up to the wall, "You're supposed to put a piece of paper in one of the cracks of the paper; a wish… Something you want so badly you know G-d's the only one who can come through for you with it…"

"And what's your wish?" Leo inquired as he looked above his reading glasses and studied Zenigata's expression.

Max paused a few moments in thought before resuming his walk towards the wall, "It doesn't matter…"

"Sure it does! What is it, Zenigata?" asked Leo, "That's it on the paper, isn't it?"

"Yeah," Max stopped in front of the wall, took a deep breath, and crammed the small piece of paper into the crevice, "…Please…" he muttered under his breath as he walked away from the wall.

Leo looked over his shoulder; Max was leaving. He looked back at the paper, and began to reach for it, but stopped himself. He removed a small bit of paper from his own pocket, a pen, and wrote a simple sentence on it, and left it beside Zenigata's.

"Hey, LeBlanc, hurry it up!" called Zenigata.

"Huh? Yeah, I'm coming!" shouted Leo, who ran from the monument back to his vehicle.

Max resumed their drive about the large city, Leo constantly keeping his firm grip upon the dashboard until they reached the small house again.

"Well, that was fun…" Leo muttered as he stumbled out of the vehicle.

"Hey, it's not over yet—The sun hasn't even set yet!" said Max with a smirk.

"Huh?" Leo turned back about to Zenigata and looked at him questioningly.

Max gave a rare smile, "This place has got an awesome nightlife…"

"Jeeze, um, I dunno, Zenigata, I…."

"Come on, LeBlanc, it'll be fun!" Max reassured him, "You don't know unless you try; plus you can try out your language skills when you order us drinks!"

"Oh, you mean like I did when you were under the legal drinking limit in Miami?" Leo snapped.

"I'm hardly a baby, LeBlanc… Besides, I was a week from turning twenty-one, anyway!" snapped Max in response.

"You got drunk off your ass and threw up in the cab…"

"So I can overdue the partying something," Max shrugged. "But I won't tonight, I promise!"

"Well, I'll go, but please don't take me to anything too freaky," Leo begged.

"Heh, just the usual weird," responded Max with a smirk.

Later that Night:

"Israel… The home of the Twelve Tribes, Moses, Jesus, Mohammed… And a million glow sticks…" Leo thought aloud as he entered the darkened, loud club with Max.

"Pretty cool, huh?" Max said with a smile as he nudged Leo.

"Oh, yeah… Cool… Those two guys just went into the bathroom together, and I don't think they're going to do what you usually do in there…" mumbled Leo with a slight tone of suspicion in his voice.

"Hey, let's go grab drinks!" Max shouted.

"This is your idea of fun? A dark, loud, tight, hot space full of a bunch of alcohol and cigarette smoke?" Leo yelped as they both seated themselves at the bar.

"Yep!" Max laughed in response. Zenigata ordered their drinks while Leo continually glanced back at a man about his age staring at him. The man approached Leo and seated himself next to LeBlanc.

"Est-que ce tu a danser (Do you dance)?" asked the man with a smirk.

_'His French is awful,' _thought Leo as he sipped his brightly colored drink. "Non; je ne danse pas… Mais, merci beacoup, Monsieur… (No, I don't, but thanks, man.)"

"Et leur copian (How about your boyfriend)?" asked the man, pointing to Max.

"My boyfriend?" Leo blinked a few times in surprise. He looked over his shoulder at Max and chuckled, "Non, c'est mon ami! (No, he's just a friend!)"

"What are you speaking?" Max asked as he rocked back and forth in his seat.

"I just wanted to make sure he was French… I like the French…" responded the man, "I was asking your friend for a dance…"

"Go for it, Leo," Max took a long swig of his drink and smirked at the pained Leo.

"B-But—" before Leo could protest any longer, he found himself out on the dance floor with the stranger, "I… I don't usually do with this…." Leo admitted.

"What? Dance?" asked the man with a chuckle.

"Well, um, not with guys… Or girls for that matter… But that's beside the point!" snapped Leo, "I…"

"Just try it… You might like it!" said the man as he took Leo by the hand and led him deeper onto the dance floor.

Hawaii:

Yukiko let out a shriek and grasped onto Toshiro, who fought to squirm out of her grasp, "Let go, Yuki! He's not real!" Toshiro choked, waving his arms madly in the air in an attempt to receive oxygen.

"What? How do you know that?" snapped Ally.

"How dare you defy the spirit of Nezumi Kozo!" snapped the samurai.

"Okay, enough with the dried ice… I saw _Phantom of the Opera, _too… God, makes me wonder if I'm the only freakin' one of the planet who think Andrew Lloyd Weber's a hack…" sighed Toshiro heavily as he rose and approached the heavily-clad samurai, "First off, Nezumi Kozo lived during the Edo period—You're dressed for the Meiji period, which was_ hundreds_ of years afterward! Secondly, you folded your kimono wrong—If you were one of the dead, you would fold the right over the left, because, well, you're a stiff. But you've folded your kimono left over right, signifying—"

"Dammit, dammit, okay, you win! Just shut up!" snapped the samurai, who lost his frightening voice suddenly. He threw aside his sword and folded his arms across his chest, "You win, all right? What kind of a freak are you, anyway?"

"A member of the Rat Clan and a member of the New York City Broadway Performers' Union," replied Toshiro.

"You're a member of the Rat Clan?" a woman's voice sounded now, and a teenaged Japanese girl appeared from behind a panel, "How so?"

"I'm the nephew of Rat Boy Jirokichi," explained Toshiro. "My mother was Haru."

"Haru? She's the leader now, isn't she?" the samurai tore away his kabuki mask to reveal he was about the same age as the girl.

"Yes," Toshiro nodded.

"And was her oldest son, you'd be the next one to ascend as head of the clan of the family," concluded the girl.

"Holy crap, Toshiro, she's right!" Heiji gasped with realization.

"I… I'm gonna be the Rat Clan leader….? Great…." Toshiro paled with horror at the thought of this, and the visualization of ruling over those heathens made him feel sickened.

"We prayed for this!" said the boy, "My sister and I, we both prayed day and night for an answer to our prayers! And now you've come, Goemon-san!"

"Goemon?" Toshiro choked.

"Well, he is your father, isn't he? So that must make the successor to both clans! We heard that someday there would be a person who would unite our clans!" said the girl.

Yukiko looked over towards Toshiro—He looked as though he were about to vomit from all of these realizations.

"Anyway…. What are you brats doing playing haunted mansion?" inquired Yukiko.

"Well…" the boy looked down awkwardly, "Sis, you explain…"

"A contractor wants to tear down this house!" said the girl, "We figured if we did this, they wouldn't want to come…"

"Why do they want to tear it down?" inquired Ryo.

"To build a WalMart," said the boy darkly.

"Well, that ain't new," mumbled Fuji.

"This is our heritage though! We have nowhere else to go!" snapped the boy.

"Listen," the girl took a step forward to Fuji. "They have the deed… We need it back…"

"And what's in it for me?" Fuji naturally responded with. "And undying gratitude doesn't count!"

"Well…" the girl paused, and thought to herself. She looked to her brother desperately.

"You get to spend twenty-four hours with me, Fuji… No holds barred," Heiji chimed in quickly.

"Wha? You… You're serious?" Fuji blinked with surprise.

"Uh-huh," Heiji smirked. "So it's your option… Either stay sulking on the beach and get a sunburn, or help out these kids, and get a handsome reward…"

"Very handsome…" muttered Fuji. "Okay, I'm in!"

"Hey, what about us? The opportunity to grope Heiji might be friggin' fantastic for you, but for some of us, we prefer actual payment…." said Ryo.

"Ryoko-sama!" gasped Fuji. "We aren't lowlifes! We're going to help out these poor, poor children, and I'm gonna have a little more than Scrabble to look forward to this weekend!" chuckled Fuji cheerily, clapping her hands together. "Okay, where do I start?"

"You owe me for this," Heiji said to Toshiro as he passed his older brother by.

Jerusalem:

Leo had been gone for a while… Max had found other people to dance with, so he wasn't in lack of a partner. Leo's extended absence did bother him, however. He excused himself from his male dance partner, and worked his way through the mainly male crowd. Leo wasn't hard to find; he was the one slumped over in a chair, sipping his drinking and chuckling.

"Leo? What are you drinking?" Max wondered aloud. "This looks like soda, but…" Max lifted the clear glass up, and looked upward at the bottom. He glared at the man seated at the table with Leo, and Zenigata soon found himself splashing the drink in the man's face.

"You dirty son of a bitch! You slipped him something!" screamed Max, "I'm gonna friggin' kill you, you bastard!" Max lunged over the table, and threw the first of many punches which were exchanged between himself and the stranger. Leo and Max were literally tossed out of the club onto the sidewalk. Max let out a moan and clutched onto the shoulder he had landed on, and Leo chuckled and looked upward at the sky.

"Leo, come on… That guy slipped you some sort of drug…" muttered Max as he lifted Leo up off of the ground and dragged him to the car.

"Ha ha! You kidding, Zenigata, I've never felt better!" Leo laughed.

"Oh, you won't be saying that in the morning…" mumbled Max as he cautiously helped Leo into the passenger seat and walked over to the driver's side, "Leo, I'm sorry… I was stupid, and I should've listened to you for once…."

"What, are you kidding?" Leo laughed, "I feel friggin' fantastic!"

"Yeah, Spanish Fly'll do that to you…" Max said to himself as he made a lane change and headed toward Joshua's house.

"Hey, it's really hot in here, isn't it? I'm really hot…" Leo said as he tugged at his shirt collar and unbuttoned the first few buttons. "I wasn't hot before… This is weird…"

"Leo, keep your seatbelt on…" Max said in a matronly tone as he concentrated on finding their temporary residence.

They arrived at the house, and Leo was well enough to walk into their room by himself. Joshua had long gone to sleep by the time the duo arrived.

Leo nearly tripped as he fumbled out of his shoes, and tumbled onto the bed. Max sat down on the opposite side and also removed his shoes.

"Ya know you're kind of cute without your glasses…" said Leo suddenly.

Max stopped, and looked back at Leo sharply, "You don't know what you're saying…"

"Yeah, yeah I do!" snapped Leo, "Quit treating me like a damn kid, Zenigata! I mean it! You're pretty good looking, for a guy… You know I don't usually go for guys, but hey, what the hell ever goes, right?"

"You're out of your friggin' mind…" Max sighed as he grabbed a pillow from the bed and removed a few blankets from the closet.

"Where are you going?" inquired Leo.

"The floor," snapped Max as he made himself a bed and lied upon it. Leo rolled over to the opposite side of the bed and then eased himself down next to Zenigata on the floor. Max stared at him gravely, "Leo, get to sleep…"

"I'm fine…" Leo responded, and grabbed onto one of Max's hands, and jerked Zenigata forward. He kissed Max, and Max had to force Leo away, "What the hell's wrong with you, huh? Chickening out of me now?"

"No, it's not that…" mumbled Max as he wiped his mouth on his sleeve, "I don't want you to do that unless you mean it. I'm a freakin' whore at times, yeah, so I'd accept it if it were anyone else, but you're special…"

"Oh, so I'm not good enough for you, huh?" Leo said angrily.

"No—You're too good for me…" replied Max quickly.

"Ya know… All I wanted was someone who loved me," Leo said after a pause. "You know… Someone I could take care of, bitch to, bitch at… But look at what happened to me… I totally screwed up with Ryo, Cecilia just uses me, and you're the closest thing I've got to a girlfriend, and you're a freakin' guy!... I'm gonna be thirty, for cryin' out loud!"

"I six years!" Max added, "Jeeze, don't worry about it… You're a nice guy… You'll meet someone…" Max said reassuringly, although this conversation was beginning to frighten him.

"I fear being even near a woman, and I'd just prove everyone right if I said I was gay!" Leo moaned.

Max held his head in his hand, and wondered if this was the reason why he didn't date women that often.

"Listen, Leo… You're a very nice person, with a lot to offer…."

"Like freakin' what?"

"Well, um… You know Dutch! Not many people know Dutch!"

"Great, so I'll know where to score the _terrific_ weed when I visit the Netherlands!" Leo cried.

"Boys, is something wrong?" Joshua asked as he knocked upon the door.

"No! I'm going to die alone!" Leo said as he threw a pillow over his head.

There was a long pause from Joshua, "You two… Sound very busy… If you are hungry, there are bagel bites in the freezer…."

"Thanks, Josh," Max gave a tired sigh, and looked back on the bed at the crying Leo.

Hawaii, during the nighttime:

Toshiro had miraculously taken up smoking within the six hours he had been introduced to his new relatives, Kara and James. They were Asian-Americans, but kept many of the traditions from Japan.

"Heh, you're not even sneaky about it, either!" Yukiko said as she walked out onto the porch where Toshiro stood, looking out at the beach, "If I'm not mistaken… Didn't you make me quit these?"

"Sorry," Toshiro said quietly. "I was just thinking…"

"About the Rat Clan-Ishikawa Clan thing, huh?" Yukiko added, "Damn, nice view…"

"I spent years and years trying to get away from the Rat Clan… But then, my mother shows up a few years ago, and now these two…"

"Well, at least they aren't bastards, like the rest of that side of your family.

"Touché…. But it's just amazing…. I never even thought about being a Clan leader!" Toshiro said with a hint of worry.

"Hey, how do you think I feel? I'm the daughter of Daisuke Jigen, the superb gunman! The sad thing is, I'm even better than my dad, and all anyone sees is a girl who's tryin' to live up to daddy's standards! They feel frickin' sorry for me, like Dad made me do this! I want to though… I couldn't think of any other way to live! ….Well, I couldn't…." she turned away from the porch and placed her hands in her pockets.

"What's that supposed to mean?" asked Toshiro with worry.

"It means…" Yukiko took in a deep breath, "It means I think I could be… Um… I might be pregnant…."

"But, you'd have to be like a month along!" Toshiro gaped.

"Yeah, yeah, I know… Last time I give you a break on Valentine's Day…" Yukiko nodded numbly, "I took a test…. I'm waiting for the results…"

"We've got to learn to get separate hotel rooms when we're drunk…" said Toshiro with a sigh.

"Oh, I'm glad you think it's a freakin' joke!" snapped Yukiko. She spun around and glared at him, "If I am, that means eight months of me eating like a boar, looking like a whale and walking like a penguin!"

"Well, I'm sure you won't…"

"Look at Odori… She just ate an apple pie—The entire freakin' apple pie!" snapped Yukiko, "I don't like junk food!"

"Neither does Dori…" Toshiro said as he watched Odori pass by the glass doors with a bowl of ice cream. "How long before we get those results?"

"Ten minutes," said Yukiko as she looked down at her watch and back up at Toshiro. "What I am gonna friggin' do if I'm carrying a friggin' kid?"

"Well, we'll go get married," said Toshiro with a nonchalant shrug. "Odori's already good with swords, so I think it'd be okay if I took a break and stayed home while you went out and did your thing… I've got no problem with playing Mr. Mom…"

"You'd really do that, huh?" Yukiko said after a pause.

"Yep! Definitely! I love kids…" Toshiro nodded.

Yukiko sighed, "Well, let's go back inside… I've got to write up a list of things to say to my parents if it turns out positive…"

"You, too?" Toshiro chuckled as he led her back inside the beach house.


	9. Come Sail Away

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Lupin III, but I've got a box of tissues and another cold… This makes cold number what, 23?

Hey, again!

Sorry once again that this is so late, but we're up to home repairs around here again, and as stated above, I've got a cold… For what it's worth, though, this chapter's a little longer than usual. I've gotten a lot of great feedback and really good ideas so far, so thanks to everyone for the support. I couldn't have come out with all 109 chapters (and counting) if it weren't for friends and readers' support.

Fun fact of Boredom: There might be a few questions about Toshiro and his somewhat creepy love for birds… This is a reference to early volumes of the first _Lupin III_ manga… There are several references to Goemon and birds made throughout the series.

_'You'd better run for your life if you can, little girl,  
Hide your head in the sand, little girl.'_

The Beatles, _'Run For Your Life'_

Chapter Nine: Come Sail Away

Jerusalem:

"Oh, my head," Leo moaned as he turned in bed. "What happened to me last night?"

"Some creep passed you a roofie," Max yawned as he rose from the floor.

"What?" Leo blinked a few times with surprise, "Someone spiked my drink?"

"You bet," Max stretched and yawned once again. He looked in a mirror and rubbed his eyes; Leo noticed the left eye slightly blackened.

"What happened to you?" Leo gasped.

"I kicked the crap out of him," Max answered as he seated himself next to Leo on the bed. "How's your head? Still hurt? I think that's what they landed on when they threw us out, and—Yeouch…" Max retracted his arm as he felt a shooting pain in his shoulder, and Leo immediately went into nurse mode. "I knew I'd be feeling that today…"

"What's wrong?" Leo asked worriedly.

"I landed on my shoulder… My ribs are sore, too…" Max muttered quietly, "I'll be okay…"

"Here," Leo began to unbutton Max shirt. Zenigata immediately backed away, a little surprised by Leo's action, "I need to see how the bruises are forming…" Leo explained as he continued to unbutton the dress shirt and set it aside. "Oh, ouch… Zenigata, you didn't have to do this for me! What did he do, punch you?"

"Hit me with a chair leg in the ribs," Max replied.

"We need to get you to a hospital! You could've broken a rib, and it could be floating, and you could end up puncturing a lung or something!" Leo said worriedly. "Oh, Max… Jeeze, man… Why'd you go and do that for me?"

"Because you're the only friend I have, and you're the co-father of my daughter," Max replied as he sucked in another painful breath.

Leo sighed and shook his head, and walked into the small bathroom, "Come on in here, Zenigata…" Leo instructed. Max rose steadily and hobbled into the bathroom. "Come here and sit down…" Leo ordered. Max obeyed, and seated himself upon the toilet seat lid. Leo removed a bottle of hydrogen peroxide and some cotton balls from the cabinet and went to cleaning the wound on Max's right shoulder and the area of his ribcage.

"Hey, watch it! That thing's cold!" snapped Max.

"I'm sorry, but the skin's scraped… It could get infected…. And… What in the hell is that?" Leo muttered, "Did you land on your ass somewhere? What's that black thing on your back?"

"That's nothing," Max rose too quickly, and let out a long groan. He seated himself on the cover again and gripped onto his pained shoulder.

"You've got a tattoo, Zenigata!" Leo laughed wildly as he viewed the black Japanese writing on Max's back, "Isn't that against your religion?"

"Just finish already!" snapped Max angrily.

"Isn't that usually a spot where women get them?" asked Leo with a laugh. "What's the Inu Gang, anyway?"

"It's the name of the gang I belonged to…." Max grumbled, "Would you just finish up?"

"Do your parents know about this?" asked Leo.

"No! And they're not going to find out, either!" said Max in a threatening tone.

"Heh, all I have to do is catch you in the shower at the right time, snap a picture with a digital camera, and—"

"Unlike you, I don't like posting pictures like that of myself on the Internet," said Max with a snap.

"Hee hee…" Leo laughed shyly as he went to apply the Neosporin to Max's wounds, "My father was never so proud to have me as a son when he found that…."

"Hm, yeah…" Max said with a small sigh, "Hey, what did he think when you…. Back in Hawaii….?"

"He's still a little freaked over it," admitted Leo. "I've got to do your bandages now…."

"And what about your mom?" inquired Max.

"She doesn't know…" Leo responded.

"What would she think though? I mean, hypothetically speaking…"

"Why are you asking me all of these questions, Zenigata?" Leo implored.

Max cleared his throat, "I… I want to take you out…"

"Take me out? Like as in kill?"

"No!" Max snapped, "Like…. Um… In a different sense from how we've gone out before…"

"Different how?"

"Uh… Like a date…." Max replied slowly.

"You… You're asking me out?" Leo blinked a few times. LeBlanc apparently was dumbstruck by this, "I… I thought you didn't…."

"It was stupid, I know… Sorry…" Max rose and hobbled out of the bathroom, "I'm sorry, Leo…. Thanks for the bandages…."

"Okay…"

"Yeah, I—Wha?"

"I'll go out with you, but I'm not sure if I want a date…." Leo said as he rose from his kneeling position in the bathroom, "After all, what am I supposed to say, Zenigata? You're all banged up, and you've got a hit out for you! I might as well make your week a little better…"

"Yeah… You did, don't worry about that…" Max smirked, and waited until Leo left for the kitchen, closing the door behind himself, to let out a cheer. He didn't care if it was a pity date, Leo still said yes!

Hawaii:

"So, we go in, and steal the deed through this window!" Fuji explained as she went over her blueprints with the two twin Rat Clan members.

"You know, when she starts thinking with her pants, she becomes really motivated…" muttered Ryo, who was clearly impressed by this. Ryo looked over her shoulder, and watched as Toshiro and Yukiko walked into one of the bathrooms of the beach house; she was perplexed by their strange expressions. The doorbell rang, and she looked down at one bracelet upon her right arm which also doubled as a watch. "Mail, this time of night?"

She strode to the front door, and drew out her gun. She kicked the door open, and came face-to-face with a horrified delivery boy.

"Um… From a secret admirer!" choked the young boy, who bounded down the stairs, away from the crazy woman with the pistol. Ryo stared down at the porch, and at the two-dozen white roses, with one red one in the center.

"For me?" she muttered, and picked it up. She opened the card and scanned over it, reading aloud, "Ryoko…. In honor of White Day…. Love, hopefully you don't know who… Huh… Who the hell sent me flowers?"

"Ryoko, who are those from?" asked Odori as she walked into the hall.

"I… I don't know…" Ryo shrugged. As she lifted up the basket, she caught a glint in it, and gasped as she laid eyes upon the gold bracelet tied to one of the roses. "Ari… It could only be Ari…"

Meanwhile, Yukiko had shut the bathroom door, and looked over the results while Toshiro stared onward pensively. She studied the box, the white test strip, and the box once again. She let out a sigh of relief and leaned back against the wall, "Thank God… False alarm…." she said gratefully.

"Does this mean another banishment from the bedroom for me?" inquired Toshiro as he rose from the lip of the tub and looked down at the results himself.

"Nah," Yukiko shook her head. "It would've been as much my fault as yours… Jeeze, the last thing I would've wanted right now is a freakin' kid!"

"I guess this means we aren't getting married then, huh?" Toshiro sighed, "Well, I guess some people just can't…"

"When would you set the date?" asked Yukiko as she tossed away the results.

"Well, not until fall, at least! If it's this year, at all!" Toshiro shrugged.

"Fall, huh?" Yukiko rubbed her chin and stared in the mirror, "That's almost half a year away, isn't it?"

"Yeah… You're getting really weird all of a sudden…" said Toshiro.

"Nah, nothing," Yukiko shook her head and walked back out into the living room. "We'll talk later!"

"About what?" Toshiro rose and began to pursue her, "Yukiko what—" he was disrupted by the sudden appearance of Heiji, who leaned against the doorframe, preventing an escape, "Heiji, I—"

"Am in debt to you and going to pay it off, right? I can swear that's what you look like you want to say…" Heiji finished.

"Um… Sure…. What the hell ever… I just—"

"I need you to help me," said Heiji in a business tone.

"With what?" Toshiro asked anxiously as he watched Yukiko disappear from sight, "…Crap… There she goes… Listen, Heij, this is nice and all, but—"

"I want to know who he is…" Heiji whispered.

"Who? Would you quit talkin' like a friggin' bridge troll and just tell me?" Toshiro asked with annoyance.

"I found a letter from Dori… It's addressed to her kid's father," said Heiji, handing Toshiro the envelope, "She didn't mention the guy's name or anything…"

"And what the hell am I supposed to do to help?"

"Use your clan influence to find out which clan this guy is from… He's from some clan, I know, she mentions that… Just not which one it is," Heiji added, "I'm the second son of a clan everyone hates… You're from two clans that everybody hates, but you're the first born son of each clan—And that gives you power…"

"None that I asked for!" Toshiro hissed.

"But you've got it, and if I'm going to let Polly Pervert in there go out with me, you're going to use it!" snapped Heiji.

"I… Dammit, all right! I need to make some phone calls, though… And none of this to Yukiko… She's been kind of annoyed with my biological mom since she was poisoned by her…"

"Do whatever you've gotta do, but do it," said Heiji. Heiji walked away from his brother, leaving Toshiro angry, annoyed, and with a splitting headache.

"I go from playing a puppet on stage to being Heiji's…" muttered Toshiro darkly. "He's more manipulative than Fujiko, sometimes!"

Jerusalem:

Leo had sent Max out for lunch, giving him the perfect opportunity to make his phone call while he had the house to himself. He pulled out his cell phone and dialed the familiar number. It wasn't long before someone picked up, "Hello?" Fujiko inquired.

"Mom?" Leo inquired.

"Ari!" Fujiko gasped in surprise, "What… What are you up to, Mister?"

"Oh, nothing much… Trying to catch my sister… Trying not to get killed… Trying convince the world that I'm not Mrs. Zenigata…. The usual…" Leo replied dully, "I'm in the middle of knitting you a sweater… It's teal…"

Fujiko gave a pained moan, but tried her best to conceal this. An entire part of her closet was now dedicated to sweaters which her son had made for her over the years… And to think, this was all her fault.

"Mom, you're the one who tried to break me of that habit I had of moving my hands nervously whenever I got stressed by giving me those knitting needles, so the only one you have to blame is yourself…." said Leo lightly.

"I'm starting to think I should've given you a yo-yo…"

"Hm, sure… I'm so uncoordinated, I'd probably lose an eye… How's Dakota?"

"She's terrific! She's out with your father right now… He took her horseback riding… He's also teaching her archery…"

"Greeattt…" Leo sighed, "That's the last thing she needs to know; how to use an arrow…"

"And how are her two fathers doing?" inquired Fujiko.

"Eh, we're okay…" Leo muttered, "Can't complain… Max just kicked someone's ass for me, last night…."

"Why'd he do that?"

"Some guy at a club passed me a roofie…" Leo said with a pang of remembrance.

"A guy? What kind of club did he take you to?"

"One that only someone like Max would love… I haven't seen so many guys in leather since that biker convention I broke into…" Leo shuddered.

"I never took Max for the violent type," Fujiko admitted.

"Yeah, Zenigata's a complicated guy… That's part of the reason why I called… I need some info on the Inu Gang… They've got a branch in San Francisco… I was hoping I could talk to Dad about it, but maybe you have some information about them…"

"Who do you know in that gang?" Fujiko wondered aloud.

"Well… Zenigata's got this tattoo on his back… Apparently he ran with them…"

"…Holy crap…. A Zenigata ran with those bastards?"

"…I'm guessing they're more than a juevy gang, huh?..."

"Um, try the Triad Juniors… That's their nickname… There hasn't been a single kid who has graduated from there that hasn't become an assassin, murderer…. Even your Dad hates them… They offered him a job years ago, and he flat-out told them to kiss his ass and then he stole the treasure himself!"

"Well, Max got out, thankfully… Wait, did you say some were assassins now?"

"Yeah…" Fujiko gasped, "That hit! You're thinking what I'm thinking, aren't you, Ari?"

"Scarily enough, yes," Leo replied. "Someone from that gang's so pissed at Max they jumped at the chance to kill him… Holy crap, I sent him out to get breakfast! This would be one of the first places they check! Thank Dad for his great hideout, Mom…"

"All right… You go find him, Arsène… I love you…"

"Yeah, love you, too… Bye, Mom!" Leo hung up his phone and rushed out, carrying a small suitcase with him. He would have to do the job on the way to find Max…

A Small Restaurant:

Max paced back and forth and looked down at his watch again; how long did it take to make sandwiches, anyway? He let out another heavy sigh and seated himself in an old white metal chair, and resigned himself to staring at the ceiling fan.

"Mind if I sit here?" he heard, and looked upward with surprise to see a brunette woman staring back downward at him.

"Eh, sure…" Max smirked, straightened himself up in his seat. "May I ask your name, Ma'am?"

"My name? It's Amy…" she answered.

"Hey, that was my grandmother's name, too!" Max laughed with disbelief, "You aren't from around here, are you, Amy?"

"Not really…" Amy smirked and fished through her purse, eventually falling upon her compact. She opened it and began to apply more powder while Max studied her quietly. She caught him out of the corner of her eye, and smirked, "See something you like?"

"Uh, well…"

"Hm…" she shut her compact and smiled at Max, "I think your order's done…"

"Huh?" Max shot to attention and looked over his shoulder. "Hey, what do you know? You're right!"

Amy opened her compact again and looked at the reflection over her shoulder… She was right… It was a Japanese man with a gun. She strategically rose and moved in front of Max as he turned away from the counter. She grabbed onto Zenigata's shoulders, and Max was puzzled by this strange action.

"Wow… You're kinda tall…" Max muttered.

"Shut up if you want to live," Amy whispered. "There's a man with a gun there, and he wants to blow your brains out…"

"What?" Max gasped, "What are you talking about?"

"I was hoping if I came in disguise they wouldn't recognize me… So much for that plan…" Amy muttered.

"Wait, who are you?" asked Max.

"Just wait here until I say the coast is clear…" said Amy quietly. She quietly walked out of the restaurant, and looked to her left. There was the assassin. She smirked, and walked towards him, "Hey, you're Asian, aren't you? Hm… Nice…"

"Sorry, Lady, I'm a little busy," said the assassin regrettably.

"Yeah, you better watch out for that club…" Amy said as she put a hand upon his back.

"What club—Gya!" he fell back with a loud thud, and Amy took a few steps back.

"Whoopsy… Mister, please don't bleed on my shoes!" Amy said in a small voice as she stepped away from the assassin, "Mommy should have told you not to play with the pros…"

She poked her head back into the restaurant and called to Zenigata, "Come on, we'll take my car!"

"Wait… This is my car…" Max said in confusion as he laid eyes upon the rental.

"Hop in!" Amy ordered.

"Who the hell are you? What'd you do to Leo?" snapped Max.

"Your partner's fine, but these heels are killing him!" Amy's voice suddenly changed into a much more familiar tone.

"…L-Leo?" Max gulped.

"Get in before he wakes up, Zenigata!" Leo ordered once again, jumping into the driver's side. Max also buckled himself in and held on as Leo sped out of the restaurant.

"Your disguise is in the back, Zenigata," Leo explained.

"Could you please explain what's going on, LeBlanc? Why in the hell are you dressed like a woman?" snapped Max.

"No one recognized me, did they?" Leo countered, "Thought not…"

"Could you please explain what's going on?" snapped Max.

"The Inu Gang is the one working on your hit…" explained Leo, "And I did some more research, and you have no idea who else is getting involved with them…"

"Surprise me," said Max as he opened the suitcase and applied the black wig in it.

"Fuji…" said Leo. "She's helping two kids from a rival clan keep their estate… The Inu Gang's in on it… Those stupid kids think that they're going to build a department store on top of it… But in fact there's a treasure hidden beneath that old rotting monument! The Inu Gang wants it… I can't believe my sister's getting involved in a turf war… What an idiot… It's hard to believe I shared a womb with that moron sometimes… I think I got more oxygen than she did…"

"What?" Max shrieked, "We've got to get the hell out of here!"

"Definitely… I forged two passports, so we'll get out of the country without anyone knowing… I sent a letter to Joshua, explaining everything…"

Max nodded, and continued to disguise himself while Leo drove to the airport.

Hawaii, in the nighttime:

"A little lower," whispered Fuji through the microphone. She was suspended by a single rope from the ceiling. Toshiro had cut out the opening, and now stood guard with Yukiko in the front of the building. Ally was in charge of lowering her down. Ryo waited for the group in the car, which was behind the tall building. Heiji was still in the process of disabling security while Fuji continued to be lowered down by the tense Ally.

"Okay, all clear," Heiji said through his own headset.

"Odori, your turn," said Fuji.

"Got it," Odori answered through her headset. A few moments later, Odori came soaring down from her own rope, and cut open the safe in which the documents were held. Fuji smiled widely, and reached inward.

"Come to mommy, babies… You've all been bad, so she has to take you away from all of your fun…" Fuji chuckled.

"Just hurry it up already… It's hot as hell out here," Yukiko moaned.

"Hey, just give me a second here, snowdrift…" grumbled Fuji.

"Snowdrift?" Yukiko muttered, "…_Snowdrift_?"

Fuji gave a small grumble, and reached into the safe. She was more than surprise when she found she couldn't pull her hands back out of the safe, "…Uh-oh…"

"Fuji, what's 'uh-oh'?" asked Heiji with worry.

"Hee hee… My hands are caught…" Fuji explained sheepishly.

"I knew you were putting on weight, but this is ridiculous, Fuji!" sighed Ryo.

"Listen, I'm really caught in these! Would someone just gimme my hands?" Fuji moaned.

"Try to pick the lock,_ bakaro_ (you idiot)…" said Odori.

"There is no lock… I don't know what this is… Dori, I've got a flashlight in my belt… Pick that up and shine it into here… I've got to see what I'm working with…" said Fuji quietly.

Odori nodded, and removed the flashlight from Fuji's belt, and shone it in the small opening. Both let out a long yell as the ball python which had wrapped itself about Fuji's wrists looked back at the two and flicked its tongue out at the young women. Odori quickly unsheathed her sword, and make a few close strokes. Fuji gave a heavy sigh as the disassembled snake fell to the ground.

"Okay… Now let's check and see exactly what we've got here…" Fuji muttered as she moved deeper into the safe. "Ohgreat…"

"What now?" sighed Odori.

"There's a guy here, pointing a gun at me…" said Fuji.

"WHAT?" Yukiko, Heiji, Toshiro, Ryo, Ally and Odori all shrieked in unison.

"Hee hee… Hi, Mister… We're just hanging around…" said Fuji with a nervous chuckle as she stared down the barrel of the gun.

"You two bitches wanna get your faces blown off?" snapped the sharpshooter on the other side.

"Bitches?" Odori snarled, and drew her sword, "I'll show you who the real dog is here!" Before she could strike, however, Ally hurriedly yanked her rope up, before Odori could do anything stupid. The gunman tried to fire, but it was impossible to hit her from the angle or his small cubby hole. While he concentrated upon Odori, Fuji took this opportunity to grab the paperwork and shimmy her way up. She met Ally and Odori on the roof of the building. She also met the men holding the two at gunpoint on the roof. She glanced downward, and saw Ryo and Heiji, both with their hands up. The car had been surrounded. Yukiko and Toshiro had also been ambushed, and although they had tried to fight, it had been in vain. Both had been handcuffed by the hands and feet, and their weapons commandeered. Yukiko kneed one man as he attempted to remove her fedora from her hand, and Toshiro gave a small laugh. He quit laughing, however, when he saw James and Kara, the two Rat Clan members.

"What the hell?" Yukiko wondered aloud. "Why aren't you two receiving the royal treatment, too? Heh, isn't it past your bedtimes, anyway?"

James growled, and slapped Yukiko across the face.

"Listen, you little bastard, I don't care how you're related to me! That's my girlfriend and you're going to treat her with some Goddamn respect!" yelled Toshiro angrily.

Kara smirked, and placed a hand upon Toshiro's face, "Hm… Thank God we really aren't related, because you're kind of cute…"

"What? What do you mean?" asked Toshiro.

"Well, we're from a Clan, but not the one you think," James explained. "We're actually members of the Inu Gang… Well, it's a Clan, technically, but we're always recruiting… We've even got a celebrity in our group! Well, he used to run with us… You might know Max Zenigata…"

"Max was… Oh my God, this just keeps getting worse and worse…" grumbled Toshiro.

"Hey, your uncle is officially off of my Christmas card list," snapped Yukiko as she looked over at Toshiro with annoyance.

"Here are the others," said several other gang members as they led Ryo and Heiji and then Ally, Fuji and Odori over to James and Kara. "What are we going to do with them?"

"Send one with a message…" said James with a smirk, "But who?"

"Odori," Fuji said quickly. "She's got a baby…"

"Fujiko, no, I—"

"Odori," Fuji looked at Odori seriously. "I know you just want to protect me, but if you don't save your baby, you're just being selfish… You're parents were thoughtful enough to give you to a rich family, so why don't you follow their example?"

Odori looked downward a long, long while… Everyone had a lot to lose… What if someone were killed while she were away? She had sworn to protect all of them; it was part of her strict samurai code. What if they were all were… She wouldn't think about it… Fuji was right… As scary as that sounded…

"All right, I'll go," Odori nodded. "What's your message?"

"Zenigata and LeBlanc are flying here as we speak," said Kara, passing Odori a letter. "Give that to them… With their relatives hostage, I don't see how they'll be able to refuse…"

"You did this grand set up just to get back at Zenigata? Jeeze, his life sucks already! You think you'd be doing justice if you killed him?" Fuji laughed wildly, "He'd probably give you a freakin' medal!"

"Shut up, or we'll turn you into sushi!" hissed Kara. She turned to James, "How long do you give her before we start killing them?"

"Eh, I say sunrise… Which one you want to kill first?" asked James with a tone of normal conversation.

"How about that little freak with the big nose and the mop top haircut?" asked Kara, pointing back to Ally.

"No, not him…" said Toshiro quickly, "He's got a fiancée. What about me?"

"Hey, you've got a freakin' fiancée, too!" snapped Yukiko to Toshiro.

"Would you two quit squawking?" James asked, covering his ears, "How can you two stand one another?"

"We don't; that's why we get along so well!" Yukiko answered with a snap.

"Exactly!... Um, what was that about the fiancée part?" asked Toshiro.

"Would you just shut up?" James lifted the butt of his gun to Yukiko's face, and was about to come down when Ally kicked the gun out of his hand. James growled, picked up the gun, and instead pistol-whipped the Jigen boy across the chin. Ally fell down with a thud.

"ALLY!" Yukiko and Ryo yelled in unison.

Ally slowly rose, clutching onto his bloody chin and glaring at James and Kara, "You lying, backstabbing…"

"Save it," snapped James. "Let's get them back inside… We'll wait until then…."

About an Hour Before Sunrise:

Odori waited pensively for the two inspectors as she paced back and forth in the airport terminal. The stress had caused her to down an entire foot-long sub from the deli and half a two-liter while she waited for Leo and Max. Her tension heightened as she watched their plane filter out, and became more and more anxious as the passengers lessened and lessened, until there were none left. She looked around frantically, and peered inside the tunnel connecting the plane to the building, "LeBlanc, Zenigata? Anyone…"

"Odori!" Odori swung about in surprise as a black-haired white man growled and pointed to her. Next to him stood a suspiciously tall woman in a purple dress, "You're under arrest…."

"Zenigata?" Odori gasped.

"You bet your ass!" growled Max, revealing his handcuffs to her.

"Great way to keep a low profile, Max…" muttered Leo.

"LeBlanc?" Odori choked with shock.

"Yeah, I'm afraid so… Odori, where are the others?" asked Leo.

"Like she'd tell us!" Max snorted.

"They're being held hostage," Odori explained.

"How do we know you're not just tricking us?" snapped Max, pointing accusingly to Odori.

Odori frowned; she was not in the mood to be accused of lying, "I'm not behind it; it's a group of friends of yours called the Inu Gang…"

"The Inu Gang?" Max choked.

"They sent this letter. I'll explain in the transportation which you pay for," responded Odori.

"Um, sure…" Max picked up the luggage for himself and Leo, and they met Odori outside by the cab. Odori seated herself in between the two, and the cabdriver was a little more than surprised when Leo and Max shed their disguises and returned to their normal states. Odori looked down at Leo's jacket pocket with interest.

"Are those salted peanuts?" she inquired.

Leo sighed, and removed them from his jacket pocket, "Anything for an expectant mother…"

The cab driver followed Odori's directions, and Max nearly suffered from a stroke when he had to fish out forty American dollars, plus tip, to the driver. Leo instructed the cabbie to driver to Heiji's beach house and drop their luggage off there, which set him back about fifty.

"I feel like I was just robbed…" muttered Max as he walked up the steps with Leo. Leo looked to his partner, and could tell that he was troubled, and not from having to pay so much for a cab ride. There had been something in that message.

Odori knocked upon the door, and an Inu Gang member led her in. The member and Max's eyes met briefly, and then Max averted his eyes to the ground and the three followed the lackey into the large office where the Lupin IV members had all been tied to chairs.

Max looked down in shock at Ally, who was still bleeding from the wound he had received, "Okay, you've got what you wanted…" said Max to Kara and James, "Now let them go…"

"We're afraid we can't do that," Kara gave a villainous chuckle. "Why don't you three have a seat?"

Two armed gang lackeys went to grab Max, but he quickly turned and punched one in the face, elbowing the other as he drew back his arm. Leo also attempted to fight off the masses of guards, while Odori concentrated upon the ropes which bound her companions, "Ryoko!" she called, and threw Zantetsu. The blade cut through Ryo's bindings, and Jigen caught the handle of it, and went to untying the others. One gang member went to grab Ryo, but Toshiro, the person whom was next undone, quickly took care of the man by throwing him over his shoulder.

"I think it's a good time to get outta here!" shouted Fuji as she was set free, "Heiji, no offense, but Hawaii sucks!" Fuji then proceeded to toss the blade back to Odori, and shouted for the samurai to seek some sort of cover.

"Gah!" Max gave a yell as James grabbed him by the arm and subdued him. He drew a sword, and held it to Zenigata's throat.

"Hey!" James shouted, "I hope I have everyone's attention now… You all win… You're free to go… But this one stays with us… He'll see what happens to people who desert our gang."

"Why not take me, instead?" Max's eyes quickly shifted to Leo.

"LeBlanc?" Max shouted, "What the hell are you—"

"It'd be the most logical choice, on your part," Leo explained to James as he polished his glasses and adjusted his tie.

"And how's that?" snapped James.

"Well, it's obvious, isn't it?" Leo laughed, "Max is in love with me!"

"…I'm gonna throw up…" Ally muttered under his breath.

"Oh, so now you're a sociopath and a homophobe?" Toshiro said to Ally with interest, "Wow, you're circle of people who you like is ever-tightening, isn't it?"

"It's not that…. It's just… I used to double-date with that guy, and now he's… It's weird…" Ally admitted.

"I'm what?" Max responded flatly.

"….You're kidding…" James gaped a little at this, as did Kara.

"We've even got a daughter!" Leo continued, "She's adorable, too… Max is the mother, is case you're wondering…"

"Okay, I know you're trying to save me, but you're crossing the line, Leo!" shouted Max.

Leo took a few more steps towards Kara and James, "Wouldn't it make more sense to have him suffer, knowing that he was responsible for my death? Why, he'd probably kill himself, and you two would be national heroes! You'll be the people who killed Lupin the Fourth…"

"What in the hell is that idiot doing?" Ryo said under her breath.

"I don't know, but even I'm stumped…" replied Fuji.

"You're Lupin the Fourth?" Kara laughed, "You can't be serious…"

"Well, is this more convincing?" Leo dropped his mousy tone and spoke in his naturally nasally, Lupin III-like voice. He also removed his glasses, and gave a look of arrogance which only his father would normally wear. "See… You'd win big-time if you listened to me…"

Kara gave a long pause, and turned to James, "He's right… We'd be rich and famous, and have our revenge…"

James sighed, "Well, you are five minutes older, Kara, so I'll agree… Fine, Lupin…"

"Good, now I'll walk over to you, and you let Zenigata go," Leo instructed.

"Wait," James held out a hand, stopping Leo in his tracks. "Disarm yourself, first…"

"All I've got is a set of knitting needles," Leo smirked and held up his finished scarf. "What do you think of it? I think I should've used a different technique…"

"Give that to me," Kara instructed, holding out her opened hand.

"Well, okay," Leo shrugged, and passed it to Kara.

"This is the most bizarre material I've ever felt…" Kara mumbled as she graced her hands over the material, "What is it?"

"A rare cashmere…" Leo explained, "Um, could I have one last request? Well, two, actually…."

"Why not… But hurry it up…" James grumbled. He released Zenigata at this time, and Max scrambled towards Leo, putting a hand on LeBlanc's shoulder with obvious worry. "What do you want?"

"A glass of water would be nice…" Leo said. A few moments later, this was provided, and Leo gave his second request, "Please throw away that knitting project…"

"What, that's it? You're kidding… That's stupid!" James laughed, "All right… Kara, you heard the man…"

Kara nodded, and tossed the knitting project away into the trashcan. "I drank as much as I could of the water…" Leo said, handing the cup to Kara. Leo leaned inward to Max, "When she throws it in, cover your ears…"

"…Why?" Max asked worriedly.

"Just…. Do it…" replied Leo slowly as he watched Kara toss in the cup, which still contained some water. A loud, loud explosion occurred seconds later.

"Run!" Leo shouted.

"My freakin' ears!" Yukiko moaned. The Lupin gang and the inspectors took off running, out of the building, which was beginning to crumble from the force of the blast.

"You destroyed a national monument!" Max shrieked at Fuji.

"Me?" Fuji yelled as she watched the Inu Gang work its way out of the wreckage, "That was all your boyfriend's doing!"

"Could we finish this later, guys? They're coming fast!" Heiji yelled.

"Yeah," Fuji nodded in response. "But how… They cut the tires on the car and—Ryo-san, you ever drive a yacht before?"

"No, but I'm always willing to try!" Ryo answered. She dove into the water and began to swim quickly towards the yacht, and Fuji still followed. Heiji carried Odori upon his back as he swam (for he was an extremely strong swimmer) and Toshiro carried the wounded Ally.

"We'll go back to my place," Heiji announced as he lifted Odori upon the yacht and then himself. The Inu Gang had taken to the water, and was now in pursuit of the yacht, and quickly catching up to the stationary ship.

"Where the hell's the captain?" Fuji wondered aloud as she looked about the ship.

"He's here!" Toshiro pulled out a frightened man from beneath table.

"Sir, I'll pay you five thousand American to get us out of here," Fuji said calmly to the man. The man nodded, and quickly took off.

"Glad I've got some more of this with me…" Leo muttered as he removed an air-tight pouch with a white substance in it from his pocket.

"What in the hell is that?" Max wondered.

"Pure sodium… Explodes in water…" Leo explained, "It's the only damn thing I ever learned in chemistry… I laced my scarf with the stuff, too. That's why it felt funny."

"Brilliant…" Max muttered, and watched as Leo opened the packet and flung it in the direction of the gang, who was soon subject to another loud explosion.

"I hope this didn't hurt the baby," Odori said as she laid a hand over her stomach.

"You were behind a wall when the explosion happened, so you ought to be all right," Ryo replied.

"How's he doing?" Yukiko asked as Toshiro sat Ally down upon the floor of the yacht.

"He ought to be all right, but it's going to leave a scar," Toshiro answered as he took a bottle of water from a nearby cooler and began to clean Ally's face with this.

"Great… A scar for my wedding picture…" Ally grumbled.

"Well, you could always grow a beard out," Toshiro suggested. Ally looked upward at him, wondered if Ishikawa was joking, but it was clear he wasn't.

"Hell, I don't know… I think I'll look into plastic surgery first," Ally responded tiredly.

While Ally and Toshiro held their first civil discussion in years, much to the shock of Yukiko, and while Ryo found something for the still-stressed Odori to eat, Fuji met Heiji upon the roof of the control room, where there was a guard rail and set of table and chairs.

"Hey, it's sunrise!" Fuji chirped, "It's a new day—A whole day! And I did my work, Heiji-chan… Now it's your turn," she gave a wide, goofy, Lupin-like smile at the thought of this.

"You know, you're just like your dad, Fuji," sighed Heiji sadly.

"Huh? I don't get it…"

"I said twenty-four hours… I stipulated neither when, nor where, nor did I say that they'd be consecutive," Heiji explained.

Fuji gaped, "W-What? You tricked me?"

"That's putting it crudely, but, yeah," Heiji chuckled.

"You... You… Fujiko!" Fuji yelled angrily.

"Hey, wherever there's a Lupin, there's a Zenigata on the chase and a schemer in the wings… Enjoy the sunrise, Princess," Heiji gave a smile before climbing down the stairs and disappearing.

"I ought to strangle him!" Fuji fumed. "Uh… Wait… Speaking of Zenigata…"

"Yes, speaking of Zenigata…" she spun back about to the guard rail, where Max now sat, Leo LeBlanc standing beside him on solid ground.

"Jeeze, Blondie, how the hell did you get up there so fast? Did they teach you that in the gang?" Fuji inquired.

"My past is none of your business, Lupin!" growled Zenigata.

"Well, since we're forgetting pasts, can we forget mine?" Fuji gave a hopeful smile.

"Like hell! I'm—We're—Taking you in!"

"Hey, I've got a question—At your guy's wedding, who's going to be the one wearing the garter?" asked Fuji.

"Why you little," Max began to run after Fuji as she shimmied down the stairs, but found he was held to the guardrail by none other than his own set of handcuffs. "How does she do that?"

"Does it really matter right now?" Leo sighed heavily, "Here, let me help you get out of those…"

"Hey everybody, look, Leo and Max are holding hands and watching the sun rise!" Fuji shouted.

"Would you just SHUT UP?" Max shrieked.

"You know, swimming home with sharks doesn't sound that bad right now…" Yukiko confided to Toshiro as they continued to sail along.


	10. J'ai Deux Amours

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Lupin III, but I do have a headache (moans, grabs ice pack, places over head)… Enjoy…

Hey, how in the heck are ya'll!

Hee hee… I know it's been a while… I'll go beat myself outback for not updating sooner… I've just had trouble with this college, and anyway who's ever graduated from high school knows the stress I'm going through right now --'. Anyway, here's the next installment… For the non-French speakers, it translates into 'I have two loves'…. The reason why I chose an old Josephine Baker hit will become apparent soon… Anyway, thanks again for reading, and thank you all so much for being patient with me.

Fun Fact of Boredom: Remember wayyy back, the Jigen and Ming dance scene from _Dragons & Phoenixes_? That was inspired by the Robert DeNiro movie _Scent of a Woman_, in which an older blind man shares a really impressive dance scene with a young woman. I'm a DeNiro fan…

_'I've loved you from the moment I saw you,  
You looked at me that's all you had to,  
I feel it now I hope you feel it too.'_

—The Beatles, _'For You Blue'_

Chapter Ten: J'ai Duex Amours

Paris, France:

"Well, I'm glad that's all out of the way now…" Max sighed as he opened the door to his and Leo's apartment and threw down his suitcases.

"Dad's bringing Dakota by in an hour or so…" Leo added while laying his own luggage by the front door and closing the door behind himself. "Hm…"

"What?" Max inquired, turning back and looking at Leo.

"There's something different about the place…" Leo said quietly.

"Heh, yeah, there's life in it…" responded Max quickly.

"Na-ah," Leo shook his head, and slowly drew his gun. "I'll check the bedrooms; you look around here, Zenigata…"

"Aye-aye, Captain," Max saluted sarcastically, and went to looking about the kitchen.

Leo first noticed the door to Max's room ajar. He slowly opened it with the front of his pistol, and nearly shot as a letter fell down in front of his face. It read:

Dear Leo,

I'm pretty sure that you'll be the one reading this because you more than likely are checking this part of the apartment. My friends and I made a few small changes while you were out, to accommodate your new, larger family.

Cheers!

Dako's Auntie L

"Fuji…" Leo grumbled, and ripped the note off, and then proceeded to look about Max's room. There certainly were changes—Instead of the one large bed, there were two smaller ones with a nightstand in between the two. Another desk and bookshelves, not to mention a closet, had also been added, to the left side of the room. "These are my books…" said Leo aloud as he read through the titles. He moved to the closet, and opened this, and found his clothes had been moved there, "Hey, Max!"

"What, Le—What the…?" was Max's reaction.

"Well, I guess you and I are a little closer now…" Leo said lightly. "My life is continually an allusion to _The Odd Couple…._" Although he said this out loud, in reality his life was more and more like _The Birdcage._

"What happened to your room, then?" asked Max.

"Don't know… Hey, a Jude Law poster!" Leo laughed, pointing at the movie poster for Law's _Alfie_remake. Max flushed, let out a small curse under his breath, and quickly hid this with a large stack of legal books. "Well, let's see what my sister did next door…"

"Your sister did this?" Max shouted. "How in the hell did she get in?"

"Yeah, so I'd check your sock drawer to see if all that money is still in there," said Leo.

"How'd you know about that money?" Max asked quickly as he followed Leo out of their room.

"Well, you know, every once in a while a guy needs coffee money, and… Don't give me that look, Max, I always put back what I take with interest… You just suck at math too much to notice… I must've added at least fifteen Euros…."

"I'll count it later… Right now I want to see what she did with your room," Max opened the door to Leo's room, and both were shocked to see it had been painted pink.

"Yep, my landlord is going to freakin' kill me," Leo said with reassurance in his voice. He looked about the room, and noticed its other furnishings. It was a room perfect for a little girl. Max opened the closet—All new clothes. There was a note attached to the vanity mirror.

"Dear Mr. and Mrs. Zenigata… Ha ha… Very funny… I know I usually like to take credit for these things, but I will firmly deny ever doing this for you two. I hope my niece likes her room. Love, Dako's Auntie L," Leo sighed, smiled, and rolled his eyes, "Hee hee…. I guess Fuji likes having a little niece…"

"Hello? Your door was opened!" Lupin called as he entered Leo and Max's apartment.

"Guys, I'm home!" shouted Dako.

"Hey, come in here, we've got a surprise for you!" Leo called to Dako.

"Really, what's up?" Dako inquired, walking into the bedroom and dropping her suitcase as she laid eyes upon the room, "Wow! It's terrific!"

"You like it?" Max asked hopefully.

"I love it!" Dako embraced both about the waist, and laughed happily, "It's beautiful!" She broke off from the two and continued to investigate while Lupin and Fujiko watched from the doorway.

"I'm guessing your sister had a hand in this," Lupin said, followed by his usual laughter.

"Fujiko, look at these outfits! Oh my God, this is from the GAP! And this is from Macy's! They're all American stores!" Dako gasped with delight. "Wha—These are Converse shoes! Oh my _God_!"

"Fuji likes any excuse to blow money," Leo said with a chuckle.

"Well, at least she's constructive," Lupin sighed.

"I'm gonna try this on!" Dako flew past Max and Leo, nearly knocking the two down as she ran to the bathroom and slammed the door behind herself.

"Well, it looks like your sister likes the idea of having a little niece, Ari," Fuji smiled and placed a hand upon his back.

"Hey, we've got that thing tonight," Max reminded Leo quietly.

"What thing?" asked Leo.

"That thing you promised," responded Max.

"Ohhh… That thing… Maybe we should reschedule, with Dako home and all…"

"I made those reservations back in Jerusalem!" Max snapped. "There was a month-long wait to get in there! Do you know whose parole I had to screw with to get in there?"

"Um, something we could help with, guys?" asked Lupin.

"Nothing," Max grumbled, and turned away from Leo. "I'm going to go get the paper, Leo! I'll be right back!"

"What the hell got into him?" Lupin asked.

"We were supposed to go out tonight," Leo sighed, putting a hand over his head tiredly. "…And I completely forgot…"

"_Out _out?... Hey, Dako!" Lupin shouted, and Dako opened the bathroom door and stuck out her head from the bathroom door, "You wanna go to a movie?"

"I'd really like that!" Dako responded, "You'll translate, right?"

"But of course!" Lupin replied, "Just finish up now, all right?"

"Okay," Dako closed the door once again, and Lupin turned to his son and smiled.

"We'll meet her down in the car. You two have fun," Lupin patted Leo on the back, and let out another line of laughter.

"Lupin, you go on—I've got to do something really quick," said Fujiko.

"Hm? Well, okay," Lupin nodded, and walked out of the apartment, closing the door behind himself.

"What's up, Mom?" Leo asked.

"Come on," Fujiko led him by the hand into his bedroom, and opened his closet. "Here we go!" she pulled out a purple dress shirt, and held it up to Leo. "Well? I think this and khakis…"

"Khaki? Why don't you just dress me in gray pants and a blue shirt and call me Lupin?" Leo inquired.

"I'm just trying to help you," Fujiko sighed, and walked over to him. "You have fun tonight Ari, and remember that your father and I both love you."

"Thanks, Mom… I will," Leo embraced his mom, and watched as she walked out, Dako running out to follow her.

Later that Night:

"Well, this oughta be interesting… Hopefully he won't end up proposing to me…" Leo muttered as he grabbed his wallet from the dresser and placed it in his back pocket, "Who the hell pays when two guys go out, anyway? I'm guessing the femme… Hey, free meal for me!"

"Leo, you ready?" Max asked. Zenigata was by the front door, holding the keys to their car in his hand, swinging them around nervously.

"Yep!" Leo responded with a smile which tried to hide his overall uneasiness on the subject of going 'out' with Zenigata. He was slightly surprised when Zenigata opened and closed the door for him, but though nothing of this.

"I hope you like the place I picked out," Max said as he walked down the numerous flights of stairs with Leo. "It's an Italian place… Just opened!"

"Well, as long as I don't eat octopus, I ought to be all right," Leo answered with a light chuckle. This was extremely bizarre, and Max knew it, too. Leo felt like he was in the _Twilight Zone_.

"What's that?" Max wondered aloud as he spotted some leftover packaging material in the back seat of the car, "I just cleaned this thing out this afternoon!"

"Oh, I… I sent some stuff off to Ryo," Leo replied sheepishly. Great, and now the ex was being brought into the picture… Te-frickin'-rrific.

"Oh… White Day, right?" Max concluded.

"Yeah… Well, she did get me something for Valentine's Day, after all… It was the polite thing to do!"

"Yeah… Yeah, I suppose so…" Max said beneath his breath as he sat down in the driver's seat. Leo seated himself in the passenger seat and contemplated whether or not to wear his seatbelt; the escape would be much faster if he refrained from wearing it, "I hope you like that place I picked…. It's supposed to be one of the best in the area… Real Italians own it!" Max said as he tried to lighten the heavy mood a little.

"So… You hear Rollings hooked up with Sanchez at the office?"

"Woah, crap, really? I thought they hated each other…"

"…Yeah… Hey, is it just me, or are our lives extremely boring when we aren't talking about the Lupin case?"

"It's because we're both obsessed for our own reasons," Max answered. "Me because of my ego and my defending of the family name, and you because you just want to keep your sister and friends out of trouble."

"I just hope I don't turn into your dad!" Leo laughed.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Max snapped.

"Hey, you don't want to turn into him, either!"

"But I can say it because he's my dad! What if I said 'I hope I don't turn into your dad, Leo?'."

"I'd laugh my ass off, because that'd not only mean that you weren't law-abiding, it'd mean that you were straight."

"Heh, you've really got a mouth on you when you put your mind to it, you know that?"

"Well, at least we found something to talk about…" Leo sighed tiredly.

New Delhi, India:

"I ain't got any worries, and I ain't money, but luck seems to follow, wherever I go… When you said hello my luck disappeared, you didn't even know I cared… I got my kings and aces, and I'm winnin' at the races…"

"Fuji, shut up!" growled Ryo, slamming on the brakes roughly and sending Fuji flying forward. Fuji's head slammed against the metal frame around the windshield of the Romeo, and she moaned.

"Ryo-san, you sure are grumpier than usual today!" moaned Fuji as she nursed the red spot upon her forehead.

"Well, I… It's nothing, Fuji," sighed Ryo.

"No, tell me! Something's wrong! Tell me already!" Fuji poked at Ryo and implored in a whine.

"I had a package arrive from Ari today!" snapped Ryo.

"And I thought you liked when that happened…. What was it, pictures of him and Zenigata? If you have any of just blondie, lemme know… He may be a jerk, but he's easy on the eyes, you know what I mean?"

"Gross… No… It was a really beautiful kimono… White with purple flowers."

"Um… I wouldn't go freaking if a guy sent me that, especially if I liked him…"

"That's not why I'm worried… Someone already sent me something for White Day!"

"So someone out there has a crush on you? Oh, that's so cute, Ryo-san!"

"But how in the hell did he get my address?"

"Him or her…"

"What?"

"You're bigger than Xena in some circles, Ryo-san."

"And how the hell would you know that, Fuji?"

"Because I've got a bi-curious following of my own," Fuji shuddered. "Sometimes women will come up to me and want me to… Uh, sign things…."

"Holy… Well, that can't be fun…"

"Not in the least… Especially when it's on a street corner somewhere… Sometimes I don't know what's worse—Being popular with the police or being as popular as a rock star with raving fans."

"Well, look at it this way, Fuji—You've saved an entire generation from idolizing Britney Spears," Ryo said with a shrug.

"Oi, she scares me something wicked, I'll tell ya!" Fuji chuckled. "Hey, we're here!"

"You sure now?" Ryo inquired, raising an eyebrow with interest.

"Yup!" Fuji sauntered out of the vehicle, and into the library which they had stopped at. Ryo followed in afterwards, begrudgingly.

"I'm surprised she even knows how to form the letters to spell library…" Ryo said to herself.

Paris:

Leo was split on whether or not to tell Max that the waiter had just called him a blond bastard in Italian, but decided against it as Max began to speak.

"I wanted to thank you again… For this… I know it's kinda weird," Max admitted as he leaned on the booth table which they shared.

"Well, I've had lots of people like me, Zenigata… Just never a guy friend," Leo answered, wondering if he were actually saying the words that poured out of his mouth. It was just too strange. He looked away at the other tables as he noted Max looking at him strangely, as Zenigata had done before.

"It's nice out tonight, neh? You know, my mom used to send me to places like this when she'd hook me up with someone," Max sighed with a tone of bitterness in his voice. "I got to know a lot of the guys around there pretty well… I even thought about asking one of the waiters out for a while…"

"Does your mom know yet that you date almost strictly guys?" asked Leo as he took a sip of his water.

"Not yet… I'm not ready to die, yet," Max replied. "You know, it's weird…"

"What's that?"

"Well, I mean, I'm traveling all over the world, I've got a roof over my head, and I've got a kid now, in a sick, twisted, way… And I've got someone to care about… You know what; I think I'm actually… happy! For the first time in my life, I'm actually happy with my station in life! And to think it could be from my family's sworn enemy, ha ha! You guys aren't so bad, you know… Even your sister, even though she's a total bitch, and she's sort of snobby, and she whines a lot… You're the complete opposite, though… You're just too uptight… But, you know what, other than that, you're really an awesome person. Sometimes I just wish you were a girl, so I wouldn't look like as big fruitcake when I told you that I've had a crush on you for a little while now.

"I never even really looked at Asians until you, either! I guess you're just special like that. I'd really like it if you stayed and helped me raise Dako, Leo. She needs another good parent. You're a lot better with kids than I am… Let's face it; she likes you a little more than me… Jeeze, this is never easy to admit to someone… I know you really aren't for those things, but didn't you… Did you ever think about maybe.… Considering? I know I've got a temper, and huge ego, but I make up for it in other areas. Come on—I could cook, you could file taxes… It'd work out to everyone's advantage."

There was a long,_ long_ pause from the other side of the table. He had been joking about the proposing part earlier, but he knew what direction Max was heading in.

"…Um… Bathroom… I've gotta… Run…" Leo's voice cracked as he clumsily stood up from the table and made his way to the bathroom, running into the dessert cart and nearly falling over it as he did so. He ran into the bathroom, and immediately reached for his inhaler. He had no idea how long he pumped it in order to keep from hyperventilating, but he saw a good dozen men give him strange glances as they entered and exited the bathroom. When he finally stopped his asthma attack, he called the first person he could think of.

"Hello?" Fujiko asked on the other line of the phone.

"He likes me!" Leo moaned, leaning against a sink and holding his head in his hand. "He just told me that he likes me! He told me he wants me to stay and be Dako's 'mom', I guess… Gwaa, oh God, he wants to friggin' sleep with me, I'll bet! Jesus Christ…"

"….I take he broke the news to you, huh?"

"No crap!"

"Don't curse," said Fujiko quickly. "Now just calm down…"

"I can't, I… I'm gonna throw up…" Leo said in a pant, and proceeded to do so while a disgusted Fujiko waited on the other side of the phone. Leo slid down to the floor of the bathroom, his back against the cold wall. "Mom, I'm…."

"Totally freaking out," Fujiko finished. "How long have you been in the bathroom?"

"How did you know I was in…"

"I just heard a toilet flush, and there's an echo," Fujiko responded. "You just need to calm down…"

"Mom, it's… It's Max! It's—"

"Time for you to calm yourself before you have a heart attack," sighed Fujiko. "Okay, Ari, I'll tell you what to do, but you have to promise you'll calm yourself."

"Yeah, yeah, I promise," Leo said quickly.

"Okay… You need to go out there and talk with him… Just act cool, all right? Pretend you're like someone in the family for at least ten minutes. You can do it; I know you can… You can't have Max out there alone for too long. It may be hard for you to take, but trust me, it was a lot harder for him to say to you. Especially in this really, really weird situation… After you're out of wherever you are right now, then you talk to him. Maybe you'll convince him that it'd be a bad idea, or maybe he'll convince you of a few things…"

"Not bloody likely…" Leo muttered beneath his breath.

"You know, for a Lupin, you really aren't that open minded… You know I'm your father's second marriage, right? The first wasn't to me… It wasn't even to a woman, for crying out loud!"

"I'm… Not…. Dad…." Leo reminded her sternly.

"I know, I know… Trust me, I know," she sighed. "If you were, you'd know he was in the restaurant."

"What?" Leo choked.

"Yeah-huh…. Look for an older man in a corner… There's also a bug under your table, so he probably heard everything… He thought it was all a joke, up until now."

"I'm gonna throw up again, Mom…."

"No! No you're not," Fujiko responded quickly. "You're going to go back out there, and talk to Max… He's probably terrified right now… You know how quick he is to freak… Quicker than you, even!"

"Heh, that's also arguable," said Leo wryly. "Well… I'll go back out now…. Hopefully he's still there, if he hasn't taken the car and jumped the border…"

"You never know with a Zenigata, Dear."

"No, no… You really don't…" Leo sighed, "Love you, Mom…"

"Love you too, Ari," Fujiko responded, and hung up her end. Leo hung up his cell phone, and walked back out into the dining area. Max was still sitting at the table, and had taken a napkin and was doodling away at it with vague, haphazard strokes. It looked almost as though he had drawn an airplane and a house, but Leo really wasn't concerned with this. He seated himself back down at the table and smiled apologetically.

"Sorry, Zenigata," Leo said as he rested his arms upon the table and promptly dropped his fork on the floor in what appeared to be an accident. "Hm… Darn it, excuse me…" Leo lifted the tablecloth and was not only able to see the fork, but also the bug. He removed the bug, and placed it strategically upon the table in an area Max wouldn't see.

"These are crystal, aren't they?" Leo said as he raised his water glass.

"Um… I'm not really the expert on those things…" Max answered.

"Looks like it to me… You know what's cool about crystal, Zenigata? Now, watch this," Leo licked the tips of a few of his fingers lightly, and began to trace the rim of the glass with them. A high pitched, long noise resonated, and a man from another table in the corner jumped up and held his head in pain. Leo smirked and looked back at the older man, and the old man, through all of his makeup, could still give a glare just like Lupin the Third.

"Excuse me, young man," Lupin, in disguise of the aged man, rose and approached Leo. "I was wondering if you could deliver this letter for me…"

"Sure thing, Pops," Leo answered as he took the letter from the old man.

The old man's face flushed a little with anger, "P-Pops? Heh… He heh heh… My, aren't you clever… Remember now to respect your elders…." He laid a hand down on Leo's shoulder, and squeezed a little too tight for Leo's comfort. Max found this whole situation too bizarre to even comment upon, and remained silently, sipping his water.

"Hey, wine's here!" Max said quickly.

"Bourbon… Wonderful…" said the old man a little flatly as he walked away from the duo, and out of the restaurant. "He's going to get Ari drunk off his ass…" Lupin moaned to himself when he was out of good hearing distance of the two, "Perfect… My daughter-in-law's going to be friggin' Maxwell Zenigata… Boy, Pops is sure gonna love this one…"

Lupin caught a cab home, and after about tense hour, Leo and Max finished their dinner, and headed back to their apartment. Max had originally planned on taking Leo to a movie after this, but LeBlanc looked a little greenish.

"Hey... I… I didn't freak you out, did I?" Max asked with concern.

"You? Nah!" Leo laughed, brushing this off with a chuckle, "Never, Zenigata!"

"That bad, eh?"

"Well… Yeah…."

"Listen, I'm sorry, all right? I couldn't think of any other way to tell you…. I'm not that imaginative, LeBlanc—Even my sign's usually non-creative… I'm a Libra—We just obsess over things. It's the only way I could think to tell you something like that. It's not that easy, trust me."

"I know, I've told people that before, too."

"You mean you've told girls that before, too…"

"Well, um, yeah, but I didn't want to make you feel bad or anything…." Leo admitted sheepishly.

"It wouldn't; I think I'd be more upset if I found out after all this time you're bi!" Max laughed a little at the thought of this.

"Hee hee… Yeah…" Leo scratched the back of his head, cleared his throat, and looked out the window of the apartment. He felt a hand come on his shoulder, and he jumped in response. Max immediately drew away, and walked into his bedroom.

India:

Fuji gave a long cough, and reached for her inhaler. The dust was killing her, and making Ryo even crankier.

"Fuji, could we just call it a night? I'm dying, you're dying…" replied Ryo tiredly as she set aside another large, aged book.

"Well, we've all got to go sometime, Ryo-san!" said Fuji, followed by a line of coughing.

"I don't even know what I'm looking for," Ryo moaned. "Ouch… My friggin' back…"

"A-ha!" Fuji cried, "Here it is!"

"Thank God," muttered Ryo as she wiped her forehead and seated herself in a cushy library chair. "What the hell is it, anyway?"

"Well, it's book, silly!"

"Fujiko, I didn't even know you were literate…" said Ryo.

"Hey, I can read a cereal box and a stop sign—That's all that counts, right?" Fuji responded with a chuckle, "Now let's take a look at this baby…" She cracked open the book and let out a moan. "What the hell—I can't read this! It's in Indian!"

"We're in India, what did you—Nevermind…" Ryo rubbed her forehead tiredly, "Can't we get a translator?"

"Like Ari would really want to help me," Fuji rolled her eyes and turned back to the pages.

"You know… We do know someone who's Indian…"

"What do you… No. No, no, no, and triple no!" snapped Fuji irately, "No way are we—"

"Hello, Heij? Could you ask Veronica what she's doing?" Ryo inquired. She had already dialed the number. Fuji sailed over a table of books to strangle Ryo, but Ryo lifted a thick volume of a novel, and Fuji's head impacted with this. Fuji moaned and rubbed her sore skull while Ryo continued her conversation, "She's not? Terrific! Where is she now? New York? Terrific! We'll be there in two days! Bye…"

"Why'd you do that?" Fuji asked as she examined her hand to see if her head was bleeding.

"Because we need help," replied Ryo. "Hm, that's ironic…"

"What is?"

"I stopped your thick head with a copy of the _Karma Sutra_…"

"I hate irony," Fuji grumbled.

An Airplane, 3,000 feet over Italy, a day later:

"Yukiko, look at this view!" Toshiro gasped as he looked out the window of the airplane. He was seated next to Yukiko in the very back. In front of them sat Ryo and Fuji, in front of them sat Heiji and his electronic equipment, and in front of them sat Odori and Ally. Ally tried to make his presence unknown by covering his face with his hand. Odori had robbed each of her friends of their in-flight peanuts, and had the empty bags set neatly upon a tray.

"No, thanks," Yukiko loosened her tie a little and looked away, into the aisle. She was taken aback a little when she thought she saw her father. But no, it was only Ally, who had started to grow out a beard to mask the nasty scar that had been delivered to him a few weeks ago. They had not been able to stop long enough for him to see a decent plastic surgeon, so hopefully now they would be able to stop after this job.

"Why, are you chicken?" asked Toshiro with a chuckle.

"I don't like really, really high places. I had a bad experience as a kid," Yukiko admitted as she thought back to an incident long, long ago, when she still called her father Jigen. She had run up a catwalk, and nearly fallen onto the wooden stage, thanks to Collin. Luckily, Zenigata had been there to save her.

"Jeeze, I guess I'll have to find a nice house, then… I better check my accounts…" Toshiro said to himself.

"Huh?"

"Um, nothing, nothing at all," Toshiro shook his head, and looked back out the window.

The flight made a stop in Milan, Italy, around nighttime. The group went their separate ways, for the time being. Ally went to go find some new reading material, Odori went to go eat, Ryo went outside to have a rare cigarette, Toshiro and Yukiko quickly resigned themselves to the bar, and Heiji walked around aimlessly in the shops of the airport waiting area. Fuji made sure to stalk Heiji every inch of the way. He strolled into a magazine store, and Fuji hid herself on the other side of the aisle he was browsing through.

Heiji removed his cell phone, dialed a number on it, waited a little, "Hey, Veronica! How are you? Ha ha, with who? Fuji—You're kidding, right? Heh! That bimbo? She couldn't work her way out of a paper bag,…"

"WHAT?" Fuji's head shot up over the aisle, and she glared down at Heiji.

"You know, it's not nice to spy on people… Especially when they actually aren't talking to people…" Heiji said, showing her his turned off cell phone. Fuji grumbled and ducked back down into her aisle. "Caught you, Lupin…"

"You think you're so damn cute, don't you, Heiji-chan?" Fuji muttered as she walked down his aisle and met him.

"Well, yeah," Heiji nodded and shrugged. "What, you don't?"

"I do, and sometimes I think that's a problem of mine…"

"Hey, I never asked for you to like me…"

"I didn't, either…"

"Not my fault all you did was use me when I was fat," Heiji sighed as he picked up a magazine and flipped through it.

"I did no such thing!"

"God burns the tongue of liars."

"I am not a—"

"Yes, you are. You're a liar, and you're what my father would call a 'loose woman'," said Heiji with a snap.

"That doesn't mean you don't feel anything for me, Heiji-chan."

"I might have once, but then I saw how superficial you really are."

"Well, how do you want me to un-superficialize myself, eh?" Fuji inquired.

"I… I don't know, Fuji… You've got to figure that out for yourself," Heiji sighed, and tossed aside the magazine.

"Listen, I can't do that!" Fuji laughed with disbelief.

"Then I guess you better stop stalking me, Fujiko…"

"Heh, I'm a Lupin, and we never give up, Heiji," Fuji gave a sigh, and turned away from him. Heiji was slightly taken aback; was Fuji for real?

Before he could figure this out, he found himself outside of the store. He knew he was being mean to her, but he couldn't forgive her easily… He had a hard time in general forgiving anyone. He was still angry at Toshiro for not being there for his father, still angry at Ari for leaving… Angry at a lot of people for a lot of reasons.

"Maybe I should go apologize…" Heiji said to himself. He stopped, and did not have long to think before it literally hit him, the 'it' in question being a blunt object to the back of the head. Heiji tumbled to the ground, his eyes rolling back in his head, and was drug into a corner of the airport.

Fuji, meanwhile, was walking back to the store where she had left Heiji. Maybe she was a little immature, but she couldn't help it! It wasn't as though she had asked to be the Lupin the Fourth fill in; she had always assumed she'd take on a role similar to her mother's, and play the vixen. But no, she had to do freakin' everything.

She came to a dead halt, and looked down at the ground, slightly curious. There were marks on the carpet where someone had been dragged, and she could've sworn she had last seen Heiji standing in that very spot when she had walked off. She was unsure as to whether or not her hunch was right, but she had to find out for sure. She followed the trail, and was also greeted with a blow to the back of the head. She soon blacked out, the last thing she saw being a passed out Heiji lying next to her.

Two days later:

Fuji awoke to the shrill call of a rooster. She moaned, and turned, only to come face-to-face with a goat. She let out a yell of surprise, and sprung up from her bed, which she realized was a pallet of hay. She looked to her left, and saw Heiji next to her, still asleep, "Heiji-chan… Heij… C'mon, wake up, please?"

"Huh, what?" Heiji slowly came to, and looked about, "Where in the hell am I?"

"Come on, this is no time for a roll in the hay!" snapped Fuji, rising, "I can honestly say I don't know where we are…"

"Hey, where's your gun?" Heiji asked as he sat upon the hay.

"Wha, I—It's gone! So's my jewelry, all of my other weapons, my wallet--Son of a bitch! Please tell me that I wasn't friggin' mugged in an airport?"

"Okay, I'll let you keep that thought to yourself, then," Heiji replied. "Don't sweat it—They robbed me, too… They even took the twenty yen in my jacket pocket…"

"Great… Now how will we catch a cab hone?"

"Have your parents wire some money!"

"Oh, yeah, just what my dad would like to hear—How I was pick pocketed!"

"Well, for what it's worth, this is more of robbed and left for dead… I'll see how far we are from the airport; it can't be that far." He rose, and opened a bar door, and let out a choke.

"What's wrong?" asked Fuji, approaching him.

"That sign… It's in Russian…"

Fuji saw a wagon struggle past them, drawn by an old horse. She turned to Heiji and gave a pained look.

Paris:

"The others are in New York, but Heiji and Fuji are MIA," Leo explained to Max as he continued to pack his suitcase. "There's been no sign of them for two days now. I'm starting to get concerned…"

"Maybe Heiji went off and married her," Max thought with a shudder. If Heiji married Fuji, that'd make her his niece-in-law… Leo would be his nephew-in-law.

"You okay, Buddy? You look a little pale."

"Eh, nothing," Max shook his head, and resumed packing.

"…I had a long talk with my dad last night…"

"He was at the restaurant, wasn't he?" Max sighed.

"Yep," Leo nodded.

"What'd old man Lupin have to say for himself?" asked Max.

"Well, after he blew up at me and said quote un quote, "I raised Lupin the Fourth, not Lupin the fa—"

Max quickly stopped him, "I don't like that word… I got called that too much in accounting school… Moving on…"

"We just came to some understandings," Leo shrugged.

"Understandings? About what?" Max asked with genuine interest in his voice.

"Well, um… Listen, I'm just really confused right now…" Leo admitted, rubbing his forehead, "I need some time to think about everything…"

"Everything? I don't know what 'everything' is, LeBlanc!"

"You may be a blond, but you sure as hell have a hard time playing dumb, Zenigata," Leo said with a chuckle and a shake of the head.

"Hey, did you have a good time? Two nights ago…"

"I had a lot on my mind then," Leo admitted. "It wasn't your fault… Yeah, I had a great time, Max…" He folded another one of his shirts and laid it in his suitcase. Max approached him, and Leo immediately tensed. He couldn't help it that he was less and less comfortable around Zenigata everyday.

"So, what'd your dad say to you, anyway?" Max inquired, seating himself upon Leo's bed and looking up at LeBlanc intently.

"Well… It's not like I was going to carry on the Lupin the Fourth name, anyway, and… I've, I've got to finish packing…"

"Ari, no matter what you choose, I'll still always be your friend, okay?" Max rose, and embraced Leo briefly, and walked out of the bedroom.

"I wish it were as simple as you make it sound, Zenigata," sighed Ari as he zipped up his suitcase and left it next to the doorway.

"Hey, I just got a call… We're heading to New York," Max said hurriedly.

"You know, they say it's a hell of a town," Leo added.

"Ha ha… You know cursing doesn't make you any more grown up."

"I'm two years older, jerk."

"…That's a relief…"

"What is?"

"You're back to calling me names," said Max. "I was afraid I had lost that."


	11. Hot for Teacher

DISCLAIMER: I do not own _Lupin III_, but I've got a song in my heart and a dance in my soul… Eck that sounded crappy…

Hola, que paso?

Heh, this would've been out sooner, but have prom , and Grad Nite, too… Oi. Anyway, I'm glad that everyone's been soo super patient with me. And in an answer to a question posed to me in a review for the last chapter, yes, I had heard vaguely of Heiji Zenigata, and no, you weren't wasting my time, DragonLegendRickGreen. I'm really grateful that you took the time to tell me this, actually! But, yes, since Heiji Zenigata was a famous family member from the Zenigata Clan and there was also an Uncle Heiji on Goemon's side (Goemon's uncle's name and the Zenigata connection was unintentional; I had not heard of Heiji Zenigata at the time when I had written his character in), I figured that naming Goemon and Amaya's son Heiji would act as a bridge for the two families. Well, that's about it, thank you Rick, I'm glad I could answer your question, and I hope everyone enjoys the following chapter!

Fun Fact of Boredom: Toshiro's shocking relationship to Goemon is based off of a storyline in indie comic _Usagi__ Yojimbo_, which is loosely based off of the story of Miyamoto Musashi, who mastered the two sword technique (note, this is also why Toshiro carries two swords). But, unlike how Goemon first thinks that Toshiro is his brother, the character in the comic, Usagi, is aware but is unable to tell a young boy traveling with him that he (the boy) is not his nephew but his son. As a side, Usagi is the same rabbit samurai featured in _Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles._ My goodness that was a long one…

Chapter Eleven: Hot For Teacher

Russia:

"Where do we go from here, Fuji?" Heiji inquired.

"I don't know—What do I look like, the leader?" Fuji snapped in return as she watched the cart disappear over a hill.

"Um…"

"Let me think, let me think…" Fuji said, turning away from him.

"Don't try too hard…"

"You ever think that I only play an idiot for show?" Fuji asked, looking back at Heiji with a severe look of annoyance. She suddenly turned on a dime, snapped her fingers, and smiled, "I've got it!"

"Really?" Heiji blinked a few times in surprise, "Well, what is it?"

A Little While Later:

"You two don't look like professors," admitted the principal of the high school.

"You would not either, if you had been robbed and left for dead," Fuji responded.

"What are your names, again?" asked the principal in perfect English.

"Mr. and Mrs. Ikeda," Heiji replied before Fuji could speak. "We just married a little while ago, and they even stole our wedding rings! Bastards…"

"No need for language here, sir," the principal shook his head, and rose. "I'll find someone for you two to board with… It makes me wonder why my other English and Computer Applications teacher left in such a hurry, though."

"They said something about Moscow," Fuji said with an innocent shrug.

"Moscow?" the principal blew up at this, "Those ingrates, I—Never mind… I've got two foreigners, now… Let's see Moscow beat that! You two will start tomorrow… I'll give you a little money out of my own pocket you can pay back later. Just enough to buy yourselves a few school-worthy outfits. Mrs. Ikeda, I'd strongly suggest something with not as deep a cut in the neckline."

_'And I'd strongly suggest you kissing my ass,' _Fuji thought as the corner of her mouth twitched with anger.

"Come on now, Dear, I suggest we go and take a tour of the facilities," Heiji took Fuji by the shoulders, and led her out, a nervous smile upon her face. As he guided her out of the office, her accidentally bumped into a young student, who as a result dropped her textbooks. Heiji apologized, and bent down to help, but when he tried, the girl quickly pulled her fallen belongings over to herself, and delivered what was probably one of the nastiest glares Fuji and Heiji had ever received.

"That was… Slightly creepy…" Fuji admitted as she watched the young girl run hurriedly down the hall.

"She looked scared," Heiji added.

Fuji narrowed her eyes, "…She looked familiar…"

New York:

Leo heard the tea kettle whistle, and grumbled to himself. He quickly set his iron back on the ironing board and ran into the kitchen. He and Max were in a surprising upscale hotel, which included a kitchen, a shower with hot water, and springs in the mattresses that wouldn't rob either him or Max the opportunity to bear children. He poured himself a cup of a tea, and contemplated brewing one for Zenigata as well. After a few moments, he shrugged, and decided this wouldn't hurt, and also brewed Max a cup.

Zenigata was still in the shower, where he had been for quite some time. Max had been quieter to him, Leo had noticed. But this could be expected… After everything that Max said, how could it not be?

Leo looked into his teacup and sighed, "How bad could it be, really?"

He knew one of the answers holding him back, and it was children. All he had talked about with Ryo was having Lupin the Fifth. He had driven her crazy with it. He was now afraid that the family name wouldn't carry on, but he had been recently informed that this was not so, and the name would indeed live on. Leo had yet to tell Max this, however. Many things had gone unsaid between the two.

"Some things are just better left to be kept secret," Leo said to himself. He sighed, walked back into the living room, and turned off the iron, and seated himself on the couch. "Okay, if it's not about the kid thing, anymore, what's it about now? Is it because he's a Zenigata, because he's a guy? And I've never had good luck with blondes… Cecilia was a blonde," he shuddered at this thought and sipped his tea, "Bitch…"

He sipped his tea again, and watched as Max exited from the shower, a towel wrapped about his waist and another one over his shoulders, "Hey, tea! Please tell me you made me some…"

"Of course. It's in the kitchen," Leo sighed, and flipped on the television. Max nodded, and walked into the kitchen area, quickly finding his tea and walking it back to the couch, where he seated himself next to Leo.

"Ironing again?" Max said, slightly amused as he looked back at the ironed pants on the board.

"It's a nervous habit… Like knitting… Before the knitting, I used to drum my fingers on tables… Drove my mom nuts," Leo chuckled. "I tried to take up smoking, but I went into an asthma attack and had to be rushed to the hospital."

Max laughed a little, and sipped his tea, and set it down on the coffee table. He then turned to Leo and spoke, "Listen, about a few nights ago…"

"Hey, I said it was okay."

"It's not that—I want to know what you think about that… About…"

"I don't know anymore," replied Leo with a shake of the head. "It's a lot you're asking of me."

"Just let me do one thing, okay?" Max pleaded calmly.

"Huh?" Leo drew back a little, obviously worried.

"Nothing bad, I swear. Just work with me, okay?" Max asked.

"Um, sure… I guess…" Leo's eyes immediately shifted to his right shoulder, where Max had laid a hand. Leo's eyes remained fixated upon his shoulder, so LeBlanc was completely unprepared when Max leaned in and kissed him. After the initial shock, Leo pushed Max back, and flew off of the couch, and across the room.

"You son of a bitch," Leo hissed, grabbing his jacket from the coat rack and throwing it over his shoulders. "You, you—"

"You what, Leo? Heh, you just try to find something that I haven't been called, Ari…"

"Don't call me _Ari_…"

"No, you save that for your family. Your sister, your mom, your dad—Ryo… I want a family too, all right?"

"I'm going out, and if you _ever _touch me or do anything like that to me again, I'll never speak to you again, Max," Leo warned. He stormed to the front door, and opened it, only to come face to face with Ryo, Odori, Ally and Veronica.

"What the hell do you all want?" Leo snapped. Even Odori drew her head back in surprise at this comment.

"I better go put on pants," Max sighed, rising and walking into the bathroom.

"We, eh, heard yelling… Who's killing who?" Ally inquired.

"No one—Yet," Leo responded, taking out a set of handcuffs and swinging them about once.

"Okay, no games—Where's Fuji?" asked Ryo in a businesslike manner.

"What do you mean, how should I know? Isn't she with you all?"

Ally shook his head, "We haven't seen her or Heiji since the airport."

"Well, maybe they got married. In that case, give her my blessing," said Leo, waving Ally off.

Max walked back out, still buttoning his dress shirt. He sported several pairs of handcuffs in one hand while he fumbled with the buttons.

"Zenigata, why do you bother—You know you won't arrest us," Ryo chuckled lightly.

"You never know with Max, Ryo," Leo said with a hint of bitterness. Max glared and gave a small growl beneath his breath in response. "He's just full of surprises."

"That's the pot calling the kettle black. Tell me why again your dad had to go to Great Britain? Something about DNA testing?" Max wondered aloud. "What was that all about, eh?"

Leo paled and felt his heart sink to his feet. Max knew, somehow, damn it, Max knew!

He turned back to Ryo, looked at the others, and after a moment's though, pushed Ryo out the door and closed it in their faces, "Sorry, we've got things to talk about!"

"Jesus, I know why everyone's saying Interpol's going down the crapper now—It's because of those two," Ally muttered.

"Now what?" Veronica, who had remained silent up until this point, inquired.

"Well, I'm going to go home and pray, for one," Odori responded. "After I find a hot dog vendor…"

"Wait, what about Heiji and Fuji?" asked Veronica.

"You don't have to feign liking Fuji, first of all, Veronica," said Ryo. "And second, I'm sure they're fine… Ari's probably right—She probably kidnapped him and took him to some ultra-romantic resort…."

"Heh, probably somewhere where Fuji takes all of her other boyfriends," Ally answered in wry response.

Russia:

Fuji collapsed onto the bed of the small guest room, kicked off her heels, and moaned, "I hate Russia… I hate kids… I hate _snow_! I hope I never see another snow cone as long as I live!"

"I take it you didn't do so well?" Heiji said, raising his eyebrows.

"If those pervy little boys weren't ogling me, I was getting spitballs thrown at me!" snapped Fuji, "I wish I had my gun… I'd shoot all a' those little jerks," she rolled over in the bed and threw a pillow over her head, "Please tell me you got in contact with someone?"

"The next plane doesn't depart from here to New York in four days," Heiji answered, seating himself in a chair across from the bed. "You know, this would be a lot easier if you just swallowed your pride and let me call my parents, or had your parents wire some cash."

"For the last time, I can't do that!" snapped Fuji, "You don't understand—I've got a name to uphold!"

"Yeah, but for the price of your sanity?"

"I know… Ouch…" she muttered as she sat up in bed, "Someone put a tack on my chair… I didn't think people even did that anymore! I want to go back to France, where the people are rude to me in my own damn language!"

"Well, did you get in contact with Ryo?"

"No," Fuji moaned. "How about Veronica?"

Heiji shook his head, "I can't get to a computer, and that woman couldn't work cell phone to save her life."

"You smart people are usually like that—Smart in some areas, morons in others."

"I guess that makes you a smart person then, huh? We just need to find the areas you're actually smart in…" said Heiji with a smirk.

"Ouch… Not now… Someone put paste on the floor in front of me and made me slip…" Fuji grumbled, rubbing the back of her neck. She was a little more than surprised when she felt a set of hands over her neck.

"Just stay still," Heiji sighed. "I'd have to help Dad out sometimes after he trained, and do this… Truth me told, I like doing this more to a twenty-four year old girl than a cranky 50-something year old man…"

"Oh, really?" a smile grew upon Fuji's face, and in a quick movement, she turned around on the bed and threw Heiji down upon it, "You like twenty-four years old, eh? Well, you're in luck here, buddy! You just hit the jackpot…"

"Holy crap, look at that!" Heiji gasped, pointing to the window.

"Wha—Owww…." Fuji moaned after quickly turning her head back to the window. She fell back and rubbed the even more pained area, "There's nothing there! You tricked me!"

"Would you expect anything less of someone who's practically your form of Fujiko?"

"Huh? I don't get it… That's my name…"

"…Never mind…" he resumed rubbing her neck, and rolled his eyes as she began snoring, "Great… I wonder what else you fall asleep in the middle of, Fuji…" he sighed, and rose from the bed. He removed her high heels, and set her on one side of the small bed, throwing a thick blanket over her in the process. He then switched off the light, and also crawled in. "I hope they're having more fun in New York…"

Toshiro's Apartment:

"What's this?" Yukiko asked, picking up a magazine the samurai had tossed to her.

"Go to the dog-eared page," Toshiro instructed as he continued to search through his closet while Yukiko sat comfortably in a cushy chair in his bedroom.

"What do you think?" he inquired from inside the walk in closet.

"It's a house," Yukiko said with confusion as she looked at the picture.

"Two stories, plus a basement and two car garage… In the middle of nowhere… Surrounded by twenty acres," Toshiro continued. "There's a pool, and room for anything, almost… A small aviary, a shooting range…"

"Woah, what? You're going to buy this?" Yukiko gaped.

"I bought it this morning," Toshiro answered. "With the money I'd saved up over the years from doing things around New York."

"But… I thought you loved the city!" Yukiko said with confusion.

Toshiro stuck his head out of the closet door, "I love you more… Anyway, I hope that you like it… Sorry… Sorry about the secrecy… I just wanted to surprise you!"

"What are we going to need five bedrooms for?" Yukiko asked suspiciously. "Are we moving my mom in or something?"

"Well, actually… There's a smaller house on the property, too… I talked with your mother about it, and she's thrilled… She misses the country, actually."

"Everybody knew about this except me!" Yukiko laughed with disbelief, "Okay, if she's living in her own little place, and we're living in a house with five bedrooms, and we're only going to use the one, what are we going to do with the other four?"

"You could always have a sewing room…"

"Ha ha…" Yukiko said flatly. "What's wrong with your apartment that you can't keep living here?"

"…Too many memories…" Toshiro said after a long pause. Yukiko nodded, and looked over to a patch of newer carpet in the room. That must've been where Julia had been killed, she concluded. She had bled there, and Toshiro had promptly changed the carpeting. It was understandable why he could no longer live here. "Hey, let's go see your mom!"

"Good idea," Yukiko answered. The conversation was beginning to make her uncomfortable, anyway. She followed Toshiro out of the room, out of the apartment, and up to her mother's apartment. "She's already packing…" Yukiko said out loud to herself as she noted the boxes in the doorway. She became alert as she heard unusual noises from the other side of the door—Laughing? She wasn't sure, but there was definitely more than one voice in the room. She drew her gun, and slowly nudged open the door with her foot. She and Toshiro both gaped at the sight of Sakura and an unfamiliar white man around Yukiko's mother's age laughing as they attempted to move a table out.

"Wait, come on, just move it this way…" said the white man in a New York accent.

Sakura laughed, "Okay, okay… Hold on! I can't move the table that way!"

"It's because you're a midget…"

"I'm five-foot-four! I'm sorry I can't be half a foot taller, and closer to your height!"

"Um… Mom… You're here… With a white guy…" Yukiko coughed, and Sakura gasped, and then dropped the table. The American gave a pained look; her dropping it had surprised him, and it had fallen on his foot. Toshiro promptly helped him break free from the wooden prison by lifting the table up in order for him to let his foot escape.

"Yukiko! This is… A surprise!" said Sakura, walking towards her daughter and embracing her.

"Yeah," Yukiko answered, looking back at the white man with confusion.

"Yuki, I'd like you to meet my friend, Paul… Paul this is my daughter, Yukiko, and her boyfriend, Toshiro Ishikawa." Sakura added, turning back to Paul while keeping an arm about Yukiko.

Paul looked up at Toshiro and gave a wry smirk, "Heh, I heard you were tall, but jeeze! Do you think you could give that poor lady a few inches? Hey, thanks for helping me out with that tight spot, Buddy."

"Hey!" Sakura stuck out her tongue at him, and Yukiko continued to wear a perplexed expression upon her face. She looked at her daughter, and smiled guilty, as though she were a child who had been caught, "Well, I believe I've got a bit of explaining to do…"

"Um, yeah…" Yukiko responded numbly.

Paris:

"And that's about all of it…" Leo set his empty coffee cup down and seated himself on the couch in a reclined position.

"And your dad definitely knows?"

"Well, they did subpoena him…"

"He must've been—"

"Pissed? Yep… That's another reason why he's been stalking us around… He still tried to save me ass though, claimed it was his…"

"Didn't work?"

"Nope, because I've only got half of my genes from him… But he didn't tell Mom ahead of time, so she really thought he had an affair on her."

"Hey, what about your cousin? He's the son of Fujiko's sister and Lupin's brother, so he'd technically have the exact DNA structure as you!"

"I thought about that , but Remy is Lupin's half brother, so not really," said Leo with a shake of the head. "It's almost perfect, but only that—Almost. And now an entire government will know that I'm still out there somewhere, and since it's dealing with Cecilia, they'll probably investigate Interpol… That bitch just had to get the last laugh in!"

"Well, you've still got a few months, right?" Max asked hopefully.

"Yeah… They safely can't do DNA testing for a few more months," Leo nodded. "But when that happens, what am I going to do?"

"As long as they can't get your DNA you'll be okay, right?"

"They've already got me on file!" snapped Leo, covering his face with his slightly shaking hands.

"Couldn't she call it off? The DNA testing, I mean…"

"Yeah, but that'd involve Cecilia being nice. God, I'm sick of running from things I'm afraid of! It's all I've done for the past four years! Teh, what am I talking about? It's all I've done my entire life! Fuji always took the fall for me, or Ally! Everyone would always take the fall for Ari! You've even stuck your neck out for me before, Zenigata… You destroyed all of my information; made it look like I was dead—And I went and ruined it all… All of everyone's hard work."

"Wait, woah, backup…. I destroyed all of your information!" Max said with slight cheer in his tone. "That means that there isn't anything on file! Meaning unless they find you, they can't find out…" Max paused for a while, as if in deep, deep thought, which he was, "It'll be easy! I used to date a guy who fakes passports! You could stay with my parents, and I could pull some strings, and you could teach at a school for migrant kids! It'd be perfect! You could even look after Dako twenty-four seven!"

"Listen, if I don't go, they'll arrest my parents, they'll arrest Goemon and Amaya and then they'll know about all of the kids they've illegally adopted, and then they'll arrest Ming and Jigen, find out Jigen owns a weapons store, and take away their twins! Then they'll go after my sister, and have her and everyone else killed."

"They?" Max inquired, raising an eyebrow.

"Listen, everyone's happy with their lives, and I can't go disrupting them! I'm not running from anyone anymore!"

"I guess this means we just wait for the inevitable, then…"

Leo shivered at the thought of this. He knew exactly what that meant—Prison, solitary confinement, death row, and finally he'd be killed He literally only had a few more months to live. He rose and walked to the bathroom, and collapsed, leaning asking the bathtub.

Max immediately ran over to Leo and knelt down beside him, and placed his hands on LeBlanc's shoulders, "It's all right, Leo… We'll think of something… I won't let anyone hurt you, okay? You have my word…"

"Thanks, Max," Leo said in a far-off whisper.

New York:

"Turn on the news," Veronica instructed, rushing into the room and changing from Ryo's Western to CNN. The getaway driver looked quite perturbed at this, and gave a small glare.

"Well, what's that?" Ryo inquired, folding her arms and sitting back.

"Look—They've opening Rasputin's grave… There's supposed to be a grand treasure in it! You think… Perhaps Fuji and Heiji…"

"Nah, no way… Fuji wouldn't leave me behind! We've been a team for years!" Ryo said confidently.

"Hm… Well, I don't know… I just had a hunch… Psychics supposedly run in our family…"

"No offense to you, but I don't believe any of that crap…"

"Hold out your hand," Veronica said after a few moments silence.

"What? Why? I hope you've got a present for me, Vic—Veronica…"

"What's that?" Veronica asked, tilting her head to a side.

"Nothing… What are you doing? You aren't going to spit in my hand or something, are you?"

Veronica chuckled, and looked at Ryo's hand, studying the palm, "You're going to meet someone soon…. If you haven't already…"

"Heh, yeah, right," Ryo rolled her eyes. There was then a knock on the hotel door, and Ryo rose to answer it. She rolled her eyes and opened the door, coming back with a vase of flowers and another note from her secret admirer.

"See?" Veronica laughed a little at this.

"I'm surprised Heiji doesn't do this to you…" Ryo muttered.

"Why would he do that? We're friends; I'm getting married, after all!" Veronica chuckled.

"Woah, really?" Ryo gaped a little, "What's the guy like?"

"Well, knowing the people who found him, he's probably very educated," Veronica responded.

"Found him? Huh?"

"Well, my parents chose him. I meet him on Tuesday."

"What?" Ryo shrieked, losing her famously calm personality for a few moments.

Veronica laughed, "That's usually the reaction… I get to know him, first! And if I don't like him, then my parents will find someone else. Everybody has to be in agreement over it…. I sort of hope it's that neurosurgeon I work with…"

"That's so backwards!" Ryo choked, "Wouldn't you be unhappy if they chose someone for you?"

"No," Veronica shook her head. "I'm not very good at meeting people, so this would actually be good for me… It's customary in my culture. Heiji knew it years ago when we dated. We knew it was just temporary then… Don't look like that, Ryoko…. It's not like how they show it on the television and movies. I'm not going to live with an ogre in a tower. My parents love me too much to marry me off to a jerk. Plus my father's ultra-protective of us… If any men ever start acting like idiots, he always pulls out his sword and talks about how he stabbed the great Goemon Ishikawa once. That usually puts them in line."

"I could not have your faith, Veronica," said Ryo with a shake of the head. "Knowing my parents, they'd set me up with some Italian that my dad had become friends with during his poker games."

Veronica appeared amused by this, "Well, I think we'll each stick to what works for us, then. Besides, I don't think your boyfriend would like it if you were to get married…"

Ryo put a hand on her forehead, sighed, and shook her head, "I don't have a boyfriend…" There was then another knock upon the door, and Ryo rose to see who it was. She was greeted with a shiny, well-wrapped package with her name written upon the tag. The same handwriting, the same fancy handwriting, and the same tone in his letters.

"No boyfriend, huh?" Veronica smirked.

"Stalkers don't count," snapped Ryo, sitting back down and undoing the wrapping on the box and then opening it. She blinked a few times at what she found. She pulled out a set of keys with a note attached, 'The car's being sent to your home in Chicago… I hope you like Packards…'. Ryo clutched onto the keys, and thought quietly; who the hell was it that was doing this to her?

Meanwhile, in the kitchen, Ally had been suckered into cooking for Odori, who waited at the kitchen table somewhat impatiently for Jigen to finish his omelet.

"How much longer, Ally?" Odori inquired.

"I don't know; I've never made one with seaweed before!" Ally responded as he flipped the omelet in the pan. "I hope not all women get like you do when they're pregnant…"

"You mean you hope Carmen won't get like this…" Odori replied.

"Hm, well, you always have been able to read me best, Odori… Better than any of those other clowns out there…" Ally grumbled darkly as he placed the hot omelet on a paper plate and walked over to her with a cup of tea in hand in addition to the seaweed omelet.

"Well, I _am_ the only one who knows you're still a virgin," Odori added as she took her tea from a stunned Ally. "…What?"

"How did—I mean, I'm not saying, but…."

"You've got that aura about you," Odori responded, sipping her tea and biting into her omelet. "This is a good omelet… Squid, you put squid in this… Sweet gods this is the omelet that surpasses all other omelets…"

"That aura isn't easy to read, is it?" Ally asked with slight worry.

"You're just like you're dad in that sense…" said Odori. "Your father, from what I hear, was much similar… Ari was, too, on the subject of women…"

"Yeah, we were both really inexperienced with women…" said Ally slightly solemnly. "Truth be told, I was slightly jealous of him when he finally got a girlfriend…"

"And now you're dating a duchess' daughter and his idea of a romantic outing is sipping Ramen noodles by television light with Zenigata…"

"You're trying to turn this into one of those karma things, aren't you?"

Odori shrugged, "I'm just saying that I don't get along well with children, and now look at me… I look like I'm a whale…"

"How, how are you going to manage? With the kid, I mean?" asked Ally.

"Well, he's going to stay with his father," replied Odori. "Receive training that way… Besides, he'll have a stepmother…"

"What? You… The guy… He's married?" Ally gaped.

Odori nodded, "They wanted children more than anything… After what occurred, occurred, we had a long talk… She came to an understanding, which obviously surprised me. I thought she'd be jealous; here they had tried and tried for a child and here I come and find out I've got something in the oven after only once… But after I told her that I'd allow them to keep the child, she was delighted… Called me her 'angel'."

"You're freakin' kidding me…"

Odori shook her head, "No… It's all true… I was about as shocked as you are…"

"Then why were you in that dojo? Is the father Korean?"

"No, he's full Japanese… In the same line of profession as my father; a samurai. I should've known then to run, but I didn't… He kept insisting that I further his training, so I did."

"Well, then how did that, happen?"

Odori paused, and looked at Ally questioningly, "You're lonely enough that you want details, Jigen?"

Ally flushed a little, and drew back slightly, "No, I mean, it's…"

"It's okay… Take a seat… I'm glad I finally have someone to speak to about this. Anyone else would shoot their mouth off, at least I know that you're enough of an antisocial ass to associate with anyone, much less speak gossip."

"Um… Thanks?"

Odori smiled a little, and a far off expression came over her face a little as she thought back to almost nine months ago, when she was still training her child's father. "He wasn't exactly my type, but I enjoyed his company… I think he's what made me realize that I was really a stuffy bitch, and that I needed to relax and 'let loose' every once in a while. That's why I've mellowed out recently…"

"You've mellowed out?" Ally quickly say the glint from both Odori's blade and eyes at this comment, and quickly apologized, and allowed Ishikawa to continue with her story.

"I even dressed in Western clothes a few times, something I would've rather faced torture than do, at one point. But it didn't matter, as long as he was there, too. His wife was out of town during the course of this; she had sick relatives and other matters to attend to at the time. I knew that it was wrong, but I couldn't exactly fall out of love with someone. You ought to relate to that, Jigen—You're pond scum who fell in love with royalty. How in the hell you landed her is an anomaly to all, you realize."

"….Has anyone told you that all of your comments are really backhanded?"

"Hm…" this went ignored by Odori, who continued, "I loved him… I still do… But, well, I know that nothing could ever come of this… At least I have the child, though, so I've made him happy. More than anything it's important that someone you love is happy, even if they don't love you in that sense, don't you think?"

Ally let a murmur to this in response, and thought to himself. How many times had he let Carmen down by not being there for her? He knew that he always felt some kind of relief when the wedding was cancelled, but what about her? She was always the ones who sent out the apologies, the one who the public paid more attention to. But she still loved him, and understood.

Ally shoved his hands in his pockets, and walked out of the room, "I've got to make a phone call, Dori… Hope you like the omelet…"

"I expect another upon your return. More shrimp this time," replied Odori.

Sakura's apartment:

"People your age date?" Yukiko wondered, turning her head to a side in confusion.

"I may be older, but I'm not dead, Yukiko," Sakura said with a chuckle.

"What did you do anyway, Paul?" Toshiro inquired.

"Oh, I was an FBI informer for years," Paul gave a nonchalant shrug, and Yukiko gave a look like she were about to have a heart attack in her seat. "I still remember you coming into the office a few times, Kid…" he turned to Sakura, and looked at Toshiro with a smile of nostalgia, "Came in with crooks, and evidence, to boot! I know cops are supposed to be tight asses, but you were a real bastard if you didn't find that kid freakin' adorable. He always came in with the sternest expression, too, heh heh… Hey, if you ever decide to give up thievery, you should really work for the FBI… Pay's great, and they have the best dental plan in the world. From what I understand, Lupin the Third works with the French government closely now."

"Yes, he tests new safety and anti-thievery equipment for the government. In return, he and his family are saved from arrest. That doesn't exactly apply to Fuji, though."

"Yeah, what a waste that kid is…" Paul sighed with a shake of the head. "God love her, she tries, but no one could beat her dad, and the closest who could is MIA."

Yukiko folded her arms, and Paul caught the suspicious glare she threw him, as did Sakura. Sakura sighed heavily, "Yukiko, he doesn't have a wire or anything on… He's retired… He didn't even know that I was your mother when we met."

"God love my wife, she's passed, but she was from Japan, so I picked up the language and culture. I met Sakura in a Japanese restaurant that I haunt nearly every night of the week."

"Does Dad know?" Yukiko asked suddenly.

"I don't think your father would mind, Yukiko," said Sakura with a chuckle. "He can't really say anything to me… He married a girl half his age who was in a rival Mafia of his. They're the living epitome of blind love—Your father was even blind when she met him. You have to hand it to Ming, she certainly went through a lot with that man… His moodiness alone, good God…"

"Hey, we have to be heading back, all right?" Toshiro nudged Yukiko.

Paul smiled and rose from his seat, "Well, it's a shame you all have to go, but it was a pleasure meeting the both of you. So, go out and have a good time, all right?"

"We'll do that…" Yukiko said from underneath her fedora, which was pulled down over her eyes in Jigen style.

"It was very nice meeting you, Sir," Toshiro shook Paul's hand, and walked out of the apartment with Yukiko.

"Come back and visit soon!" Sakura called as she closed the door behind the two.

"Well, you seem thrilled," Toshiro said as he scaled down the steps with Yukiko.

"Yeah, as thrilled as I am about a root canal," Yukiko grumbled, shoving her hands in her pockets and shaking her head, "I need a drink, seriously. You want to come? I'll buy, really…"

"As long as you're not cheap," Toshiro responded. "No Wild Turkey or anything…"

"Damn," Yukiko sighed. She suddenly turned to him, and shoved him a little, "You never did tell me about those bedrooms…"

"Well, we'll have lots of guests over… Between my family and yours, it'll be a zoo."

"Yeah, but you like animals… You don't want to bring the zoo to your house, you want to start a zoo!" Yukiko said, pointing a finger at him accusingly. "You _want_ kids…"

"Well, of course," Toshiro shrugged.

"If I ever do consider, which I doubt, it's not goin' down until I'm married. There's going to be at least one birth in my family that isn't out of wedlock and planned for!"

"The three who meet both of those criteria, Ryo, Ally, and Sachiko, are crazy," said Toshiro with concern.

"Point taken, but hey, I've got standards! The bastards end with me, right here!" said Yukiko in a shout of declaration. "But I doubt that there'll be kids, anyway, so we don't have to worry. Where the hell can a girl get a drink around here?"

"There was also a point where you said I'd never be anything more than a friend…" Toshiro said to himself as Yukiko walked out of the building. "You're going to wear me out one of these days, Jigen…"

He followed her out, and both walked to his Vespa, and drove back to the hotel.


	12. From Russia With Love

DISCLAIMER: Um…I don't own Lupin III, but now I've got a lovely bunch of cocoanuts… No, really, I'm having a party on Saturday, and it's a luau…

Hey, everybody!

Once again, another very long-awaited chapter… Thanks to everybody who read the last chapter, and I hope that you consider this one just as good, if not maybe a little better than the last. Improvement is something I strive for, and have since the beginning. Anyway, school should be out soon, so I'll be able to write more, and this story's second anniversary is in June (weird, neh?).

Fun Fact of Boredom: Sakura's last name is Yazuka, which is a play on the name of the Japanese mafia, which is the Yakuza. She is given this name because of the long and dangerous past between her and the Japanese mob.

Chapter Twelve: From Russia with Love

Paris:

Leo could not help but wonder who was shaking him awake before the sun had even risen. He looked at the alarm clock; five in the morning? Who got up at that hour? Apparently Max did, because Zenigata was staring down at him, smiling.

Finding this slightly creepy, Leo rose and sat up in bed, staring back at Zenigata tiredly, "….What?"

"Thought you'd never ask," Max smiled and slapped Leo upon the back. "Come on, get dressed. Let's go already!"

"Go? Go where? I'm not going anywhere, Zenigata…."

"Sure you are!" Max walked over to LeBlanc's closet, and pulled out a black dress shirt, flinging it at Leo, "You, my friend, are going to have one of the best times of your life!"

Leo looked nervous at this. Any other time that this had been said, nothing good had come of it. Ever.

"Did you guys know that you have a Dinseyland here?"

"Yeah; everyone hates it," Leo replied.

Max choked back his reaction at this statement. He had spent a great deal of his paycheck planning the day ahead, and a trip to Disney was on the list, and by far had been the most expensive.

"Well, regardless, I got tickets for you, me and Dako, so get out your Mickey ears and smile," said Max in a slightly threatening tone. Leo rolled his eyes, and then rolled out of bed, looking worn and disheveled. His nightmares had come back. He had really wanted to stay in bed for the day; there was no word on his case. He had been enjoying the day off, but Max looked extremely intent upon having a good day. Damn…

Max left Leo, and waited for him to prepare for the morning. After dressing, he and Zenigata drove to his mother and father's house, and picked up Dako. She was thrilled at the thought of going to a theme park, and sat looking intently out the back window as Leo followed Max's directions, driving about the busy roads and streets until at last they finally reached the parking lot. It wasn't nearly as crowded as Max had anticipated, and they entered the park quite easily.

"Leo, read this to me, please," Dako asked her one adoptive parent.

"Hm? Oh, yeah… It's a roller coaster…." Leo said distantly.

"Oh, cool! You two want to come?" asked Dako.

"No," Max and Leo answered in unison.

"Heh, chickens," Dako chuckled, and went to go stand in line. "I'll be back!"

Both inspectors watched as Dako ran to the roller coaster, and Leo was halfway tempted to watch her through the line, but before he could follow, she was on the ride.

"Come on, let's go sit and wait for her," Max led Leo over, and seated him upon a park bench. Max lit up a cigarette and turned away from Leo as he smoked it. "This is the first cigarette I've had in a few weeks… You're driving me to smoke…"

"Sorry," Leo muttered quietly.

"Heh, don't be," Max put a hand on one of his partner's shoulders and extinguished the cigarette on the park bench. He flicked it off, and stared ahead at the ride. "How can she stand that thing?"

"I don't know; if I can live with you, I guess anything's possible…"

"Aren't you full of jokes today?" Max smirked. He sighed, "Listen…. I'm just trying to make things good for the three of us while there's still time… I've got people right now who are helping to stack up evidence that would give you a really light sentence… Maybe even no sentence at all. There's a private company funding you, under the table of course. I'm in the middle of finding a good lawyer for you, as is… I've got one in mind already."

"Why? Why are you doing all of this, Max? You know I can't repay you!" said Leo with a snap.

"You already have, Leo. I'm the one repaying you," replied Max. "You're the one who gave me a place to stay, you stayed friends with me through, well, everything!"

Leo looked downward at his shoes, and back up at the rollercoaster, which now dipped and turned. His stomach felt the same way; he realized then that Max's hand was still on his shoulder, and he shrugged a little, letting it fall. Max caught this, and moved away at little from Leo.

"I understand about that, too," Max said quietly. "I'm not expecting anything like that from you, all right? At one time, yeah, I would've pushed for it… But I know that—"

Leo removed a lighter from his pocket, and lit it. Running his hand over it a few times, Max was more than shocked when a small flower appeared in Leo's hand. He pinned it to Max's jacket, and chuckled a little.

"Thanks," said Max, slightly bewildered by this.

"Hey," Dako stumble towards them, looking a little greenish in the face. She tumbled onto the bench, and leaned against Leo. "I think I'm going to puke…"

Both inspectors looked at one another, and Leo gave a heave of a sigh while Max lifted her and carried her towards the direction of the women's bathroom. He made sure the coast was clear before ducking in, but even then he was slapped across the face with a purse as his reward for his efforts.

"Well, at least you can say you got a war wound in the name of a cute girl," Leo said wryly when Max returned from the bathroom. "Maybe we should take her on a nice quiet ride…"

"Sounds good to me," Max replied.

Russia:

Heiji fumbled with his language book, desperately looking for a way to tell the students to put their books away. "I'll never find it…" he said to himself as he flipped through the Russian to English dictionary. He could barely speak Japanese—How was he supposed to communicate?

A young girl must have sensed Heiji's plight, because she rose and a addressed the students in Russian, informing them that the lesson was over. Heiji was too relieved to realize how familiar the girl was. He sat back in his chair and sighed with relief as all of the students exited. It was frustrating enough dealing with their technology, which was very outdated by his standards. The language barrier was killing him.

He only realized now that the girl whom he had had so many run-ins had stayed behind. She approached Heiji's desk and spoke in a quiet tone, in heavily-accented English. "You looked like you needed help. My mother keeps a bad and breakfast for foreigners, so I understand that it's difficult for you…."

"Thanks," Heiji sat back in his chair and closed his eyes. "I don't see how you can stand how cold this place is!"

"By that tan you're either Southwestern Asian or you live somewhere warm…" she gave a small smile, and brushed away a few bangs. "My name is Tanya…"

"I'm Mr. Ikeda," Heiji answered, taking her hand and shaking it.

"I wish I could believe that," she sighed a little. "You're the saint of cyber punks—Heiji the Hacker…"

"Eh, I…"

"You could just say 'guilty as charged'. I would recognize you from anywhere!"

"Is that why you were so surprised by us yesterday?" Heiji inquired.

"Well, I… Yeah…"

"You know, I'm good at reading people, too."

"I… It's nothing the worry about," Tanya shook her head and seated herself upon Heiji's desk. "You don't have to worry about looking; I'm eighteen." She laughed a little, and Heiji looked away from her, flushing a little.

"So, I take it Fuji's Mrs. Ikeda, huh? You two still aren't together?" Tanya inquired with interest.

"Listen, I've got another class to prepare for…" Heiji began to rise, but nearly fell as the surprisingly strong Tanya pulled him forward and kissed him.

"Heiji-chan, I—Ai yi yi yi yi…." Fuji sputtered the phrase her father always called out whenever he found himself in a situation such as hers. She backed out of the room, and called. "I guess you're busy!"

"Fuji—" Heiji pulled away from Tanya, and ran out to Fuji. "Fuji, wait, I—"

Tanya smiled; her plan was underway. He would run out of the room now, leaving his suitcase. She began to rummage through it, but cursed to herself as she found that it did not contain what she was looking for. "Why hasn't she gotten it yet? Isn't that why she's here? Who the hell else would go to Russia?"

She straightened herself up at looked down, and spoke sternly. "I've got to have her help me find it, then… I'll have to do it without her knowing, though. She'd steal it for herself otherwise, and Anya needs that book…"

New York City:

"You're doing WHAT?" Ally growled.

"I got a tip from a source in Moscow. He saw Fuji and Heiji in some farm land about fifty miles outside of the city… We used to race together. He called me wanting to get together, and was a little more than surprised when he found out that I wasn't in Russia, too," Ryo replied as she continued folding her clothes. "Unfortunately, there weren't enough open seats, so you're going to stay here with Odori, and make sure she's comfortable. She looks like she's going to have that baby any day now."

"That's not fair! Why me?" Ally growled.

"Well, you can cook, and you and Dori have always gotten along well enough…" Ryo replied as she zipped her suitcase and lifted it down onto the floor. She kissed her brother on the cheek and met Toshiro, Yukiko and Veronica outside towards the doorway. They were soon gone, and the team was once more divided. Ally turned to Odori; it was apparent that she was about as happy as he was at the situation.

"Uno?" asked Odori.

"Uno," Ally nodded, and walked into his room to find the cards.

Three hours later, New York:

"Uno!" Ally shouted, and laughed triumphantly. "I win…"

"That's 45/36, now," Odori said tiredly as she reshuffled the cards. Ally looked from beneath his thick bangs, and could notice that Odori had changed. Well, there was the pregnancy, yes, but he meant more short term changes. She looked a little pale, and a little shaky on top of this.

"Dori, are, you all right?"

"Indigestion…" Odori replied after a pause. She jumped a little, and held onto her stomach.

"Um… I have heartburn, and that doesn't look like indigestion…." Ally said with worry, rising.

"This isn't good…." Odori's breathing was now heavier, and she gulped dryly. "I think… Oh, no…"

"What's up? Is something wrong with the baby?" asked Ally with worry.

Odori nodded, "My water broke…"

"Please tell me I misheard you…"

"The baby's coming…"

"Please no," Ally squeaked. He began to search wildly for a phone book. "I'll have an ambulance right away!"

"No," Odori shook her head. "I'm having it here… I'm a felon, you think they'll let me prance in and out? You're going to have to help me…."

Ally had to resist fainting at that moment. After the initial shock, Ally uneasily lifted Odori onto the couch, and looked down, pained, "I need to make a phone call…."

Odori gripped onto the collar of his Chinese-style shirt and growled, "I'm in pain; this is no time to order a damn PIZZA!"

"I'll calling Yukiko's mom!" Ally fired back. "She's given birth before; she'll know about this sort of stuff!"

"Get some warm towels, Jigen," Odori said with a gulp. "Get off of the DAMN PHONE!"

"Okay, okay!" Ally hung up the phone and slowly backed away from it. In a rare gesture, he brushed his eyes away from his face and removed his frog-snap jacket, revealing a short-sleeved undershirt beneath this. He took in a deep breath, and went to fetch the towels.

Paris:

"Poor thing's all worn out…" Leo said with a chuckle.

"Poor thing? Do you know how much money we blew on this kid?" Max asked questioningly.

"This kid? Your kid…"

"No, our kid, really," Max said with a shake of the head as he waited on the landing for Leo to open the door, his arms full of Dako.

"Hm…" Leo returned as Max walked through with the young girl, Leo trailing him from behind and closing the door behind him.

Max removed the little girl's shoes as he laid her upon the bed while Leo went to adjusting her blankets. Both men stood up and looked downward at her with similar solemn expressions.

"I'm sorry…" Max said after a pause.

"Eh?"

"I'm sorry if I'm forcing you into this… I know it's quick, and there's a lot of pressure on you, and—"

"Let's go outside and talk some more about this," Leo said quietly as he watched Dako stir. Max nodded, and shut off her light as they left. Leo seated himself on the couch and rested his elbows upon his knees. "I'm writing you into my will." said Leo after a long pause to Zenigata, without once looking up at the blond, "I want to put you on my checking account now, and I want to split the apartment with you. When the inevitable happens, I want you to be able to live comfortably, and without having to worry…."

"Leo, I already told you—" Max started, but paused as he walked around to the front of the couch and seated himself next to Leo. "I already told you I'm working on it…"

"Everyone's always looking out for me… I just… I feel like I can't do anything…" Leo said quietly.

"That's not true!" Max said sternly, "You are a great inspector, a great father, a terrific knitter, and a wonderful person… Don't talk like that…" Zenigata moved a little closer to Leo, and grasped onto LeBlanc's hand.

"I…. Max, I shouldn't…." Leo muttered as Zenigata pulled in and kissed him. As they broke away, Leo put a hand to his mouth, "We… We shouldn't…."

"I'm… I'm sorry…" Max rose from the couch and walked away from Leo. "I'm sorry…"

"It's… It's okay," replied Leo after a pause. "It's okay…"

"It's just… I don't know what the hell it is, but I can't help it," Max admitted quietly.

"I know. I'm not going to ask you to, Zenigata," Leo rose, and stood in front of Max. "Look at me, Zenigata… There we go… Listen, I know what it's like to see someone everyday and feel one way about them and not being able to say or do anything about it. It's not fair. Life isn't fair…."

"It's been even less fair for you!" Max shouted, "All you ever wanted to do was make up for some sin you didn't even commit, and they're still going to try to punish you for it… You've done a lot for me, and I owe you, big time… I should've done something about Cecilia a long time ago…"

"Oh, God, please don't kill her—That sounds like what you're getting ready to do," Leo gulped.

"Boy have I contemplated it," Max shook his head. "I did all I could; this is in the hands of the professionals, now."

"So we wait…"

"No, you enjoy life while you can," Max responded, and embraced Leo tightly. "LeBlanc, I…"

"I figured you did…" Leo pulled away from him. "How long has it been, huh?"

"Well… Since I saw you in the airport…" Max admitted with a small flush.

The phone rang, and Leo went to grab it, leaving a shaken Max in the living room. He had never been good with expressing his emotions, and having this conversation was one of the hardest things he had ever done.

"That was the boss… Lupin's in Russia…" Leo called to Max.

"I'll grab my parka," Max sighed.

Moscow:

"You still haven't heard from Ally?" Veronica asked worriedly as she paced in the airport.

"No," Ryo shook her head. "Well, I'm sure they're fine. Probably online… Anyway, I wonder where my source went..."

"Hey, that him?" Yukiko asked as she looked longingly at the smoker's section of the airport. Toshiro abruptly veered her away from it, and they followed Veronica and Ryo out of the airport, and onto the snowy sidewalk. A man approached Ryo, and tapped her on the shoulder. She jumped with a start, and breathed a sigh of relief.

"Peter!" she embraced him and smiled, "It's wonderful to see you!"

"As it is you, Ryoko," Peter, a taller, dark-haired Russian, responded with a similar smile, "How are things, hm? Seeing anybody?"

"Heh, not for years…" Ryo replied coolly.

"What? What about…."

"Ari? He found someone else…" Ryo answered.

"I see it is a sore subject. We shall talk about it no longer… Come on, I'll show you and your friends around, and lead you to Lupin…"

"That little punk ought to have a good excuse for not calling me," Ryo said darkly as Peter led them to a taxi. Veronica, who was used to much warmer climate, shook the most as she climbed into the back seat with Toshiro and Yukiko.

"Same goes with Heiji," Veronica said with chattering teeth.

New York:

"Okay, just breath… It's all right, Dori… You're doin' great!" Ally said reassuringly. "Come on, gimme another push!"

"I…. I can't…" Odori puffed, heaving another breath of air.

"Come on! You've fought hoards of ninja, samurai, the mob, zombies! You can do this!" Ally reassured her.

"None of it ever hurt this bad!" Odori moaned.

Ally wiped her face with a damp towel and brushed her hair back, "You're doing great, Odori!"

Odori let out a yell, and Ally became even more focused, "Hey, okay, there's a head… Come on, one more!"

"I'm going to kill him for this!" Odori yelled.

"No painkillers, no doctor—You really are a tough bitch, Odori!" Ally laughed uneasily. Odori let out another scream, and Ally fell silent. Odori fell silent as well.

Then, the crying.

"It's a girl…" Ally said, lifting the baby up, "It's a girl!"

"God… She's huge… Beautiful, too…" Odori said in gasps.

Ally cleared the baby's nose and mouth, undid the umbilical cord, and soon Odori Ishikawa was the proud mother of Namiko Alana Ishikawa, who weighed in at over eight pounds, and sported a head of black hair.

"Konnichiwa, Namiko-chan," Odori whispered as she cradled the little girl in her arms.

"Hey… I'm your Uncle Allen," Ally said with a smile as he took one of her small hands. "Jeeze… She's tiny…"

Odori looked up at him incredulously, "To you, perhaps… You're not the one who pushed this out… You helped though… And thank you for that, Ally…"

"I'm going to call your parents," announced Ally, rising and walking out to a phone.

Odori waited until Ally had left the room to speak to her daughter, "I know I wanted a son, but you're even better than I could have imagined… Your family will adore you… Both of them…"

Russia:

"Hm…" Max looked down at his cell phone as the two stood in their bedroom, packing, "I've got a message…."

"Really?" Leo turned about, "What's it say?"

"…I'm a great uncle…" Max announced.

"Woah, really! That's awesome!" Leo gasped happily, "Dori had the baby, eh? That was one thing I never saw happening! But then again, I never imagined being kissed by a Zenigata…"

"Uh, yeah…." Max cleared his throat and put away his phone, "How would you feel about a serious relationship?"

"How serious?" asked Leo, rising from his suitcase.

"Well, we've already done friendship for a few years, so I thought perhaps light dating, followed by heavier dating, followed by marriage… We could… Even adopt if you wanted…."

"You hate children."

"I really do. I hate children more than I hate peanut butter, and that's a lot. You'd have to do the raising; I'll bring home the bacon."

"You're Jewish; you don't eat bacon. Zenigata, I only have a few months, and…"

"Listen, I know what you're thinking… But there's a lot of advantages to this, just hear me out!"

"Like?" Leo raised an eyebrow; this made him quite curious. Max's desperate need-to-please expression while he spoke also helped Leo to realize exactly how frantic Max was to have Leo hear him out.

"One, neither of us will accidentally great pregnant."

There was a long pause from LeBlanc, "You know, you could've chosen a million and one ways to start that off better…"

"Um, okay… Well, no worries about leaving the toilet seat down, right?"

"….Dako?"

"Crap! Yeah… Um, let's see… Both of us will wear the pants in the family, so there won't really be an argument!"

"We always argue about that… You're an egomaniac and I'm passive-aggressive."

"I'm trying to work something here, LeBlanc! Gimme a damn break!" Max growled, "I just… I don't want to lose you to someone, okay? I just… I really want to stay together… You're the only reason I bothered to get out of bed some friggin' mornings! If I had a nickel for how many times I'd come close to _hanging _myself with my damn shoelaces in Romania, I could've bought a better car!"

Leo sighed, "I've got to make a phone call, Max… I'll be back… You get some sleep, okay, man? I'll talk to you in the morning." Leo rose, and pecked Max on the forehead before walking into the kitchen in search of a telephone.

"Yeah… Good night…" Max answered, stunned.

Russia:

"Hey, it's not like I wanted that!" Heiji snapped in defense.

Fuji kept walking down the hall, ignoring him.

"Okay, yeah, that's right—'Cause you've never done something like that before!" Heiji shouted.

"Not with a fifteen-year-old!" Fuji spun around, "I know this sounds weird coming from me, but what kind of sick pervert are you?"

"Fifteen?" Heiji yelped, "She told me she was—"

"God you're naïve if you think teenage girls don't lie about their age! At fourteen I was eighteen-year-old Mineko Fujita!"

"You're Mineko? I heard about you… You were like some kind of legend with guys… And that's saying a lot, considering I was living in Japan and you were in France at the time…"

"She's a kid, Heiji-chan!"

"Fuji, I hate younger women! The older, the better!"

"Yeah, well, I'll give the warning to my grandma next time I see her…" Fuji muttered.

"Fuji, come on… She did that, not me! Wait, why in the hell am I doing this? Why am I justifying this to you, of all people?"

"Because I am your voice of reason, right now!"

"Fuji, you need a voice of reason in order to be one…" Heiji replied blandly.

"Your sarcasm will not get you anywhere, Heiji-chan… Good looks only get you so far with me! Listen, I'll just get to you point, since you're being so difficult today… If you're going to go out with a girl that young, at least make sure she's got fake papers…"

"What? I'm not a perv!" Heiji shrieked.

"Hey, it could be genetic, you know… Max is a little kinky, come to think of it… Poor Ari, hee hee…"

"Gwaa… Why do you always tell me this crap that I don't want to know?" snapped Heiji, covering his ears.

"Because someone's gotta tell you," Fuji smirked, and leaned against the wall. Both turned their heads at the sound of a hissing noise. "Um… Do the buildings in Russia fog up, or am I just drunk?"

"Fujiko Lupin…" a voice hissed in the darkness, and an old haggard woman approached out of the shadows, in a black dress and shawl, leaning heavily upon a cane.

"Eh? Jeeze, there sure are some ugly teachers in Russia…." Fuji took a step back, "What are you doing walking around here, Grandma? Isn't it your bedtime? It's three 'o clock… Understandski?"

"I understand perfectly well," replied the old woman, leaning on her cane. "How would you like your greatest wish fulfilled?"

"Me and Hugh Grant in a tub of Jell-O?... You've got my attention, Granny…"

"The diary of Rasputin…" started the old woman, holding up an old news clipping.

"Rasputin? A figure skater?" Fuji frowned, "How in the hell would a triple axle get me anywhere?"

"No! Like from the Romanov family! He was their advisor… And a bigger bastard than you could ever be, tenfold!" Heiji said to Fuji.

"Hey, I'm only a bastard literally! Figuratively, I'm a bitch," Fuji corrected.

"The diary is supposedly located in his grave, but it has yet to be found there…" said the old woman.

"And where's his grave?" asked Fuji.

"Siberia," responded the woman.

Heiji snorted, "Siberia, it's—"

"Going to be seeing two new faces!" Fuji said with a smile.

"What? We don't have any money!" snapped Heiji angrily.

"Ha, relax! I robbed a museum last night!" said Fuji lightly.

"Jesus, Fujiko…"

"What about him?" Fuji inquired, blinking.

"Sometimes I like to think that it's an act, and you're not a huge idiot…" Heiji grumbled, shaking his head. "Shouldn't we worry about getting home now that we've got the money?"

"Why settle for a slice when I can have the cake, I ask you?" Fuji smirked, and Heiji noted that she had that twinkle in her eye… The twinkle that spelt trouble for him…

Paris:

Max couldn't sleep. He was thinking too much… About this, about that… About everything and anything in between… Leo, what would happen to Leo, himself, what would happen to him, what would happen once Leo was gone… He was most worried about that; Leo leaving. LeBlanc was the best friend he had ever had, and it didn't matter if Leo wanted a serious relationship or not. If they could even remain just as friends, he would be happy. Not overjoyed, but just content in knowing that his friend was with him.

"Max, are you awake?" there was a knock on his door, and Max rolled over. It was Leo. LeBlanc slowly entered the room, carrying a small stack of papers. "I just… I wanted to go over some things…"

"Eh, sure…" Max sat up in bed, and put on his glasses, "What's up?"

"Here," Leo took a book, and set the papers on these. He pulled out a pen, and handed the papers to Zenigata. "Sign by all of the x's…"

"What? Tonight? Leo, I—"

"It won't take long, Max," Leo sighed tiredly, seating himself on the edge of Max's bed. "Just sign…"

"Yeah, yeah…" Max grumbled, and began to sign the papers, "Maxwell Zenigata, Maxwell Zenigata… Maxwell Chaim Zenigata… Ma—Hey, what's this?" Max frowned, staring at the paper in confusion, "It's all in French!"

"It's from Canada. Just sign," Leo continued, holding his head in his hands.

"Well, um, okay…" Max said uneasily.

Leo rose, and threw a bit of confetti that had been concealed in his pocket, "Congratulations…" said Leo blandly.

"Um, why?" asked Max.

"Now everything of mine is yours and everything of yours is mine," replied Leo.

"Wait… Is this… Woah, wait, I didn't agree to that!" Max yelped, reaching for the paper. Leo quickly pulled this away though, and stuffed it in his back pocket, "Why'd you do that?"

"Well, it's one way to cut down on paperwork…"

"That's it?"

"I really hate paperwork," Leo added.

"So, you're still Leo LeBlanc?" asked Max, scratching the back of his head in wonder.

"With as much stuff as I've monogrammed over the year, I'm not about to change it," responded Leo.

"What in the hell am I going to tell my parents?"

"Tell them you met a night Eurasian inspector who's got a great personality, excellent math skills, is a good dancer and a body to kill for," Leo chuckled. "I've got some more paperwork to do, but I'll be in shortly…"

"….Leo…"

"Yeah?"

"Was there…. Was there any other reason why you did this?"

"Well, yeah, you got me," Leo stopped, and smirked.

"Um… What was it?" asked Max, a little shy, a little imploring.

"Hm… Well, you see, this year, on my tax returns, I get beaucoup tax breaks," Leo replied.

"You…. You did this to cheat the government?" Max yelped.

"It could also be seen as a bonus, if it makes you feel any better…"

"Goodnight, Leo…"

"Yeah, goodnight, Mrs. LeBlanc…." Leo chuckled lightly, and closed the door, "I can't believe my dad agreed to get me a Canadian marriage certificate…. Wonder what caused the change of heart?"

A Different Part of Paris:

"I can't believe it!" Lupin wailed into the phone to Jigen and Goemon, "My kid, my only son—Married to a friggin' Zenigata!"

"Yeah, um, you also know that he's married to a guy now, right?" Jigen chimed in.

"That takes a back seat to knowing that I'm now related to Pops!" Lupin cried.

"Then why, Lupin?" Goemon inquired, "You didn't have to…"

"And you didn't have to buy Heiji a computer… You hate computers, but you still did it," Lupin answered with a small sniff.

"Jesus… Listen to us… Old, fat, cranky…" grumbled Jigen.

"You may be fat, Jigen, but I've kept my weight at a constant," said Goemon.

"Yeah, that's because each time you're at the doctors you either get a bunch of crap cut out of you or you're too up on meds to eat…" Jigen replied.

"Hold on, I've got another call," said Goemon suddenly. There was a silence as Lupin and Jigen waited for his return, and the two were greeted by a scarily excited voice on the other line, "Odori just had the baby! Namiko!"

"A girl? Hey, congrats, Goemon! I'd send over some champagne for you to celebrate, but your wife would kill me!" Jigen laughed.

_'Goemon's a grandpa, and it's a celebration… I'm going to be one, and it's a death sentence for my son,' _Lupin thought with a small flinch, "….Yeah… Congratulations, Goemon…"


	13. Baby It's Cold Outside

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Lupin, Lupin II, Lupin III, but I do own Lupin IV and possibly V.

Anyong!

Yay, another chapter that should've been posted long ago! I know that there's been some confusion over the why Leo's going to jail thingy, and I've had questions from several people about it. The thing is, Cecilia's pregnant with Leo's baby, and Leo's supposedly dead (remember in the last series Max destroyed all of Leo's information). Cecilia's claiming that the baby is Lupin IV's, so with DNA testing, it's only a matter of time before they find out that Leo's alive. Knowing the bitch Cecilia is, she'll probably direct them straight to Leo. See, kids, biology class can be beneficial, after all! (Heh, did I mention I'm an ex-science club nerd?)

Fun Fact of Boredom: Ironically enough, about a year after last writing his character into the story, I went to the hospital was given a new doctor—Named Ravi Patel. Heh, all I needed was a nurse named Collin Gilmore, and I was out of there.

Chapter Thirteen: Baby It's Cold Outside

Russia:

Peter cursed once again, and slammed down the phone. He turned to Ryo, Veronica, Yukiko and Toshiro and gave them a pained look, "I am sorry… Lupin and Ishikawa left a day ago…"

"Great! Great! So we've lost them again!" Ryo threw her hands up in the air.

"What now?" asked Veronica.

"How should I know? I'm not the leader!" snapped Ryo, turning away from them.

"Where're you goin'?" asked Yukiko looking above her fedora brim.

"To sleep… Everyone else might as well, too… We've got a long day tomorrow if we're going to try to find Heiji and Fuji," Ryo grumbled tiredly, and turned to leave the rest of the now divided group. She slammed her door shut before she could hear anyone's response.

"Sounds like a good idea…" Peter yawned, stretched, and exited to his far bedroom.

"Um… Yeah…" Yukiko nodded. She heard _'Mambo Italiano' _hum throughout the air suddenly, and answered her cell phone, "Hello? Toshiro? Yeah, sure…" she passed Toshiro her phone, "Call for you…"

"Hello?" Toshiro asked, "Ally?" he covered the phone, and looked upward at Yukiko, "It's Ally…"

"His voice sounds like it was run through gravel; of course it's Ally," Yukiko smirked and rolled her eyes.

"Why are you calling me, Ally?" asked Toshiro as he uncovered the phone. "You… You did what?"

"What'd he do?" asked Yukiko.

"He delivered Dori's baby!" Toshiro said to Yukiko, "It's a girl, named Namiko!" he added excitedly.

"Hey, I'm an aunt!" Yukiko smiled widely with a Cheshire Cat grin, "Tell Bruce Lee, Jr. and Samurai Jaclyn that I'm gonna buy them a big fat box a' cigars when we get back!"

"Ally says he'd rather have a big, big bottle of Chinese beer," Toshiro responded. "…And Odori just wants sake."

"Hey, they've got it!" Yukiko pushed up fedora up from her eyes, accenting the smile which she had inherited from her father, although this would be difficult to tell, considering how little he had smiled.

Meanwhile, Ryo had settled into her room, after having changed for the night. She turned on the television, but gave up as she found that not only were all of the channels in Russian, but nothing decent was on any of them. She shut off the television, and rolled over to sleep.

She was more than a little surprised when she heard a clamoring, and jumped up immediately, grabbing hold of her gun. She went to turn on the light, but a voice quickly stopped her.

"No, don't," said a voice who Ryo knew sounded familiar, although she couldn't place it.

"Who in the hell are you?" asked Ryo in a growl.

"I'm the one who's been sending you all of those things," answered the masculine voice.

"Why?" Ryo ventured as she cocked her magnum.

"Please don't shoot; I'm unarmed," said the voice frantically.

"Then come out of the shadows," Ryo ordered.

"….I'd rather not… Then you would really want to shoot me…" he muttered darkly. "I have no weapons; I promise."

"How do I know you're telling the truth?" asked Ryo.

"As many times as I've known your location, I could've killed you over half a dozen times," replied the voice.

"…Good point… What do you want?" asked Ryo.

"Just let me come a little closer," he begged.

"I… Okay," she said quietly, and dropped her gun to her side. The shadowed figure of a man inched closer and closer, and Ryo gasped as she felt an arm around her waist. This, too, felt familiar.

"I hope you don't mind if I…."

"Might as well," Ryo answered quietly, and he leaned in, and kissed her. This felt extremely familiar.

He backed away, slowly, and gulped dryly, "That was a really bad idea on my part…"

"Hm… I don't know… But I'd like to know who you are, Mister Mystery," Ryo said in her usual calm demeanor. "Here, I'll just turn on the light…"

"Please, no," he begged.

"Ryoko?" it was Veronica. She began to open the door, and switched on the light. Ryo turned to get a good look at the mystery person, but he was just finishing ducking out of the window he had come in. He was dressed in black, though, he saw, and had a short haircut. Light brown hair, she noted….

A Russian Hotel:

"Where the hell were you?" Max inquired as Leo ran into the hotel room, panting, "It's the dead of night!"

"I went jogging," Leo answered, falling into a chair next to Max. "Did you get a trace on Lupin?"

"Well, where do you think she'd be?" asked Max casually.

"Probably after some great treasure, if she went here… It's not exactly a vacationing spot… Check articles online, and see if there's been anything recent… Better yet, let me… I can look at about sixty-odd world papers…"

"You know that many languages?" Max asked in shock.

"No, but they speak the same languages in a lot of areas—Especially French. I could go to Belgium and live relatively easily, well, in terms of communication. Same with Morocco and San Martin—They speak French there, too."

"How about New Orleans?" asked Max.

Leo shuddered, "Nah, I get drunk off of my ass every time I go. Remember last time?"

"Yeah, sorry… I really should've stopped you…."

"I told you it's okay," Leo answered as he pushed up his glasses and went to work on the computer. "Hm… Here's something!" he said after a bit of searching, "It's in Romanian, but I can read it to you…"

"Hey, it sort of looks like English!" said Max.

"Well, it is one of the Romance languages and—Never mind… It says something about Rasputin's diary; scientists are now on the hunt for it because of supposed magic cures that can be found in it…"

"Eh, yeah, right," Max snorted. "It has magical cures, and my dad isn't psycho…"

"What, you don't believe in horoscopes and things like that, Zenigata?" asked Leo with a small chuckle and an imploring look.

"It's all BS," replied Max.

"Hrm… I don't know about that sometimes, Zenigata," Leo responded with a shrug.

"Don't tell me you fall for this stuff, LeBlanc!"

"Hey, shouldn't you agree with me on everything, now that we're—"

"You tricked me into that!"

"Like you wouldn't have not agreed to it…"

"Well, we could've done something a little nicer…" Max grumbled.

"What'd you want me to do, find a Rabbi and dress up in a garter and veil?" Leo laughed, but discontinued this as he saw Max's stern expression, "Listen, Zenigata, you signed those papers so when the cops find me you'll have time to drain out the money in my accounts."

"How much do you have in the bank?" asked Max.

"Well…" Leo took up a pencil in his hand, and began to figure the numbers on a napkin, "My pay at Interpol, plus my translating fees, the allowance my parents send me because they seem to think I'm still twelve, the money I get from teaching classes on our downtime, plus money I've won by betting in those horse races…"

"You gamble!" Max choked.

Leo smiled bashfully, "It's a hobby… Gambling's purely mathematical, and I'm good at math… Now, getting back to this…"

"What about money you collected from heists?" asked Max.

Leo shuddered a little as Max said this, "I gave all of that back…"

"And how much was it?"

"Well, um… Nineteen… Hundred… Thousand…" Leo's face flushed, "But I had already spent a lot of it…. You know, I was planning a wedding at the time, so I lost a good fifty thou there… Plus I had to buy an apartment, and I lived off of that money for a while…"

"How much do you have in there now?" Max choked.

"One million, give or take… God, I'm pathetic… My parents must have like a couple of billion times that amount, as much as my dad's done over the years…" Leo sighed, scratching the back of his head, "My dad came from a rich family, but I guess that's what I get for running…"

"You've got a million?" Max choked.

"Close to," Leo shrugged. "I know that it's… It's not that much, really, when compared…"

"To what I have, it's a hell of a lot more!" snapped Max. "Why are we living in a crappy apartment, then?"

"Low upkeep, plus it's inconspicuous," Leo admitted.

"You're making my head hurt, LeBlanc…" Max held his head in his hands. One million… Plus Leo's parents were loaded… Well, it couldn't be said that he hadn't married into a wealthy family… And to think he remembered helping his mother cut coupons when he was a child. His family was well off, too, but… Millions… It made his head ache at the thought, to think that Leo had been living off of basic cable and TV dinners, and didn't even own a car.

"…Listen, we'll… After this, we'll go on vacation somewhere," said Leo. "We'll take Dako with us… Anywhere in particular you want to go to?"

"I'd like to visit my folks, actually," Max admitted.

"Let them know that—"

"No!" snapped Max quickly, "No, no, no—My dad would have a heart attack."

"He'd survive! Look at Goemon!"

"I'm serious, Leo, he can't know."

"…You have to come out sometime, Max. Your mom's still expecting you to get married; what are you going to tell her, huh? That you became a priest and took a vow of celibacy?"

"I'll just avoid her," Max answered with a shrug.

"Good idea…." Leo muttered sarcastically. "What about that on your hand, then?"

Max looked down at his hand, and then looked away from Leo, "It's so no one will get the wrong idea…"

"You're wearing a wedding ring, Zenigata, I think your friends will get curious," Leo chuckled.

"I don't have friends," Max answered. "You're my first, to tell the truth. I won't wear the ring, if you don't want me to. I don't think it's right to get involved in something if I'm taken now, even if it is just for financial reasons…."

"No, it's okay… You can wear it, Max, if it makes you feel more comfortable," Leo said reassuringly. Max was about to add onto the statement when Leo's cell phone went off, and LeBlanc promptly answered. He looked over his glasses at Max and smiled. "We've got a tip… Lupin's on the B train to Siberia, tomorrow morning…"

"Jesus, Fuji, what in the hell are you up to?" asked Max.

New York:

"Okay now, Namiko, here's the airplane coming for the hanger," Ally said as he directed the bottle to the baby. Odori had decided to take a shower, and Ally had gladly agreed to look after the newborn girl, "There you go… Good, good girl…" he said in a very unusual tone… Unusual for Ally, at least.

"How is she?" Odori asked as she walked out. Her hip-length hair was now down, and she was drying it with a towel. Ally rose and walked over to Odori with the child, and Odori looked down at Namiko, who was cradled in his arms.

"Dori, who's the father?" asked Ally with seriousness in his voice as his eyes turned away from the baby and towards the samurai.

"A good, good man," replied Odori as she grasped onto Namiko's hand.

"There's only one man you thought was like that," said Ally after a pause. "….It's him, isn't it, Dori?"

Odori said nothing, but simply folded her arms and turned away from Ally, and bent her head down, "I really love him…." she said, "But I knew that anything was impossible… That's why I carried out the pregnancy; I felt for the first time that maybe there was a chance that he could love me, too. I know it's not possible, though…. But at least every time I look at Namiko, I can see him, too."

"Let me and Carmen raise her," Ally suggested suddenly. Odori spun around, and looked at Jigen in shock. "Listen, it'll be perfect. She'll be able to get a great education! I know you don't like Westerners very much, but hey, you've seen Cagliostro! It's just begging for a rowdy kid to come on and rough it up a little bit! You should see the parks, and the castle! Dori, she'd love it!"

"No, that's all right…. Her father is a clan leader, after all…"

"Yeah, but the Miyamoto clan…. I dunno…. I mean, they're even more rigidly traditional than your dad's clan, and I don't mean to be racist, but you're Korean, Dori! How would they take to someone who's mixed? This baby even looks Korean!"

"Musashi would never let anything bad happen to her!" snapped Odori. She shirked back a little at Ally's shocked expression, "I… I'm sorry… It is just a very stressful time for me right now; I'm dealing with a lot of things. Thank you for your offer though, Ally. I'm sure Namiko would be very happy with you and Carmen, but I already promised someone else…"

"It's okay… I mean, it's just that Carmen loves kids, but I… Let's say that there've been more relationship problems than me playing runaway groom…"

"Such as?" Odori tilted her head to a side and inquired.

"Well, I… You see, sometimes over the years, we'd try and…. But I'd get nervous… I was always good at talking to girls, and you know, on some levels, I was better at communicating with them…"

"Well, you_ did_ do a year at cheer camp."

"How in the _hell _do you find those things out?" Ally growled, "It was only because they kicked me out of martial arts camp for busting open a kid's skull with a bokken!"

"All right, anyway, you were talking about relationship troubles?" Odori continued.

"Yeah, I mean… I know she wants to, and we've been dating for years, so it's not like we're going too fast or anything, but I just choke up!" Ally shrugged.

Odori gave way to a small smile, "You're afraid, huh?"

"I won't admit that!"

"You don't have to; I can see it. The only reason you're impotent is that you're intimidated."

"By what?" Ally threw his head back and laughed, "It's just Carmen!"

"And she's going to be ruler of Cagliostro, someday, meaning you will, too. Don't worry, if I were in your position, I'd probably be in the same position as you… Have you ever thought of maybe reading up on it?"

"…..I tried…." Ally flushed at the thought of this memory, "My dad found the book I'd been reading, and then took me fishing. Him and me in a little boat in the middle of a freezing lake, no escape, and him talking with me about sex. It was perhaps the worst day of my life. It was even worse when he got drunk… You know, there are some things that you should never know about your father, and I found out all of them. I'll never eat on Lupin's kitchen counter again."

"Well, perhaps the internet would be a better source…. You already tired the psychiatrist… And well, it was Victor the bastard, but perhaps you should try it again…."

"Yeah, yeah… I'll think about it… I really want kids," Ally admitted as he looked down and smiled at Namiko, who simply looked up at the shaggy-haired, pointy nosed young man in her presence.

Siberia:

"Woah…" Heiji blinked in disbelief as he watched several beautiful Russian women walk past his and Fuji's train cabin. One looked back at him and smiled, and Heiji returned the smile. Fuji glowered, and buried herself in her white fur coat even deeper.

"They're just looking at you in hopes of a green card. It's because you dress like a Westerner," Fuji said through clattering teeth.

"How could you be cold?" Heiji inquired.

"How can you not be? You divide your time between Japan and Hawaii…."

"Do you have any idea how cold a computer tech center has to be kept?" asked Heiji.

"I didn't realize you did your work in a meat cellar," Fuji grumbled. "I hope that this train leads us close to the spot…"

"Actually, it's thirty miles out of the way," Heiji answered as he glanced over his map. Fuji let out a moan, and hung her head in defeat.

"I can't give up on this, though! My family reputation is counting on me!" Fuji cried.

And then Fujiko Lupin had a brilliant idea, and began to cry, "It's just that everyone expects so much of me, and what am I supposed to do?" she wailed.

Heiji looked genuinely horrified, and walked over to Fuji's side of the cabin, and after a few pauses, embraced her, "Um… There… There…."

Fuji tried to hold back her clever chuckle of success while Heiji embraced her, and continued to speak to him, "I just don't know what I'd do without you sometimes, Heiji-chan!"

"Well, it's all right, Fuji—I'll be around a while…" Heiji responded.

_'He would've thought I was a perv if I had just wanted to hug him, but I **really **need the warmth… Is this like using him? Oh, well, shut up, __Fuji__, you're not freezing your ass off now…' _Fuji thought as her eyes grew heavier. She was soon asleep and leaning on Heiji.

"How often are you going to do this to me, Fuji?" Heiji wondered out loud as he leaned back in the seat, "God… You look like an approachable person when you're asleep… Who'd guess that you were so obnoxious?" he remained quiet for the rest of the duration of the trip, and shook Fuji awake when they reached their train stop.

Fuji grumbled as Heiji shook her awake, and slowly walked out of the train, lagging behind Heiji. The two were more than a little surprised when the first bomb went off, and even more when the second and third bombs went off, blowing up portions of the train in front of their very eyes.

It so happened that Leo and Max had been on this same train, and gaped at the horrors about them. Max shouted as he spied Heiji and Fuji, and the chase began.

"Lupin! Get back here, now!" Max screamed.

"Um, Interpol, excuse me—Woah, pardon me!" Leo sputtered as he worked his way about the crowds, trailing behind a more active than usual Max. Leo concluded that it had to be the weather, it just had to.

"Hey, let's hitch a ride!" Fuji yelled to Heiji as they ran out onto the streets and saw a truck zooming towards them. Fuji jumped first, soon followed by Heiji. Fuji waved good-bye as Max simply growled, balled his fists, and cursed, much in the fashion of his father. Fuji's eyes snapped to attention at Max's hand. Zenigata had never worn jewelry before, but there was a ring on Zenigata's left hand. She knew the placement of this ring well; she had worn numerous on the ring finger of her left hand. Engagement rings. But did Zenigata even have time for anyone? She doubted it…

"Well, that was possibly the worst way to start off this trip…" Heiji muttered.

"Heh, yeah, tell me about it," Fuji rolled her eyes, and laid back on the hay of the truck bed.

"Why in the hell is it so damn cold?" Fuji muttered to herself as she wrapped her coat around her closer.

"Okay, according to this map, we have thirty miles until we reach the grave…" said Heiji as he laid out a map in front of Fuji and showed her the mark upon a map. "Hey, shouldn't we be concerned about those explosions?"

"Explosions aren't anything out of the ordinary for us, Heiji-chan," Fuji said with a shrug. "It's just letting us know that the welcoming party knows we're here…"

"But who's the welcoming party?" Heiji inquired.

Fuji shrugged, "I wish I knew… My ears are ringing from those explosions, still."

The Siberian Train Station:

"Wow… If my Jigen sense is kicking in, then Fuji's been here," Yukiko said, removing her cherry lollipop from her mouth and staring at the wrecked trains about them.

"Now we just need to find out where…." Toshiro added.

"Where'd your friend go, Ryoko?" asked Veronica.

"I don't know where Peter ran off to," Ryo admitted.

"Hey, look!" Yukiko called, pointing to the same wagon that carried Heiji and Fuji, "Isn't that a polar bear?"

"That's even better than a stupid bear—That's Fuji!" Ryo replied, breaking off into a run. Veronica cursed at this; no way would she be able to run as they did, with her brace on. Her prayers seemed to be somewhat answered when Toshiro scooped her up, and took her along for the run.

"Fuji!" Ryo shouted, "Fujiko, hold up!"

"Wait, _you _hold up!" Max growled, red with frustration. He sprung forward to catch Ryo with his handcuffs, and instead was greeted with his handcuff locked to a train car handle. Both Leo and Max worried when the train began to start, but Leo finally managed to free Max after some lockpicking on the run.

"Ouch…" Max groaned as he rubbed his sore wrist. "Come on, LeBlanc, let's get them! We don't have time for pain right now!"

"They're running towards that wagon, c'mon!" Leo took Max's hand, and the two soon confiscated a small old and typically poor working vehicle.

"Ryo-san!" Fuji screamed happily as Ryo, Yukiko, Toshiro and Veronica jumped onto the wagon. This naturally surprised the horses and the driver, and the wagon was now in a full run, Leo and Max right behind them in their small vehicle. Leo was doing the driving, maneuvering expertly in and out of the tight traffic.

"Hm, I taught him that," Ryo commented coolly as she watched Leo manage to make a tight turn, just as the wagon made a tight turn.

"How in the hell can we stop this wagon, or at least get some control?" Veronica shouted.

"I know a way!" Yukiko smiled and removed her gun from her fedora.

"Yukiko Jigen—No way!" snapped Toshiro, pushing the gun away from the horses. He slowly walked up to the driver's seat, where the wagon leader had long since bailed, and took the reigns.

"You didn't tell me you were dating the horse whisperer!" Fuji laughed.

"Ha ha, kiss my freezing Asian ass," Yukiko replied as a tranquilizer whizzed past her head and lodged into the back of her fedora. "Heh, Leblanc, Zenigata, before I was annoyed with you two—Now I'm pissed…" She aimed her gun in the fashion her father had taught her, and shot at Leo and Max's wheels, causing them to wipe out into a crystal shop on the corner of the Siberian town which they had found themselves trapped in.

"All right!" Yukiko cheered loudly.

"See you boys later!" Fuji blew them a kiss, and soon the more docile yet still hurried wagon was out of their sight.

"Crap, crap, CRAP!" growled Max as he rose from the mounds of building, car and crystal.

"Ow… My freakin' head…" Leo moaned.

"Excuse me…" the shopkeeper approached the two young men and smiled nervously. "Who pay this mess?"

"Put it on our tab," Max answered wearily.

A Small Inn:

"So it's supposed to have all sorts of cures, huh?" Yukiko repeated after Fuji had relayed her story.

"Yeah, what do you think, Yukiko-san?" asked Fuji, tilting her head to a side and waiting for her coworker's response.

"I think this whole story's filled with more holes than some of the corpses I've hid in rivers over the years," Yukiko answered plainly.

"Well, I don't know—All sorts of miracles have happened in the past, and there's no clear explanation for them," replied Toshiro with a shrug.

"Yeah, but you also read horoscopes," Yukiko reminded him.

"We leave in the morning," said Fuji. "It's a long hike up that mountain, but I think we'll survive it."

"You think?" Ryo asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Hey, you never know—The Yeti could be out there!" replied Fuji sincerely.

"I'm going to bed," Yukiko grumbled, turning away from Fuji and toward the door.

"Me, too," Toshiro rose from his chair, and followed Yukiko out.

"What? Hey, my dad got tears from a Yeti once!" Fuji snapped.

"Fuji, now's the time when all good little crazies go to sleep," Ryo said in a matronly tone.

"I'll share my room with you then, Ryoko," Veronica hobbled a bit to Ryo, and Ryo picked up Veronica's bag, and the two were soon gone.

Fuji smiled and clasped her hands together as she saw who was left; Heiji.

"All right, Heiji-chan! Guess it's a sleepover!" Fuji smiled widely and laid back on the bed.

"You know what, you're absolutely right, Fuji!" Heiji returned the smile, "Come here, I've got a present for you!"

"For me? What is it?" Fuji asked intently. She struggled as Heiji covered her nose and mouth with a damp towel, and she was soon limp.

"Chloroform. Good night, Sweet Princess," Heiji flipped off the switch, and safely went to sleep.

Another Hotel, Across Town:

"Ow… Ow… OW! Damn it, LeBlanc!" Max cried in pain.

"Well, I'm sorry, but I'm not the one who crashed into a crystal shop and got part of a crystal rabbit ear lodged in his hand," Leo replied.

"You crashed the car!" Max said.

Leo cringed a little; yes, this was true, "But I didn't get the crystal lodged into my hand…. Just thank God nothing got in somewhere where this would really hurt…"

"Like wh—Ouch, yeah, you're right," Max admitted with a nod, but gave another cringe and yell of pain as Leo extracted it.

"Shush, it's okay, I've got it," Leo whispered as he poured hydrogen over the wound and then bandaged it, "There, all better!"

Max took Leo's chin, and brought LeBlanc's face to his, and then kissed the fellow inspector lightly, "…Thanks…"

"Heh, it, it wasn't a problem," the shaken Leo replied, rising and cleaning up the mess he made in the bathroom. A set of arms came around his waist, and Leo immediately shot his head up. If he hadn't been so appalled/shocked, he would have thought it amusing the Max, who was almost four inches shorter than Leo, struggled to rest his head upon Leo's shoulder, but still managed.

"Max, I—" Leo spun around and leaned away from Max a bit, "It's too soon, I think…"

"Listen, I don't want you to get treat like you've been in the past," Max said sternly. "That bitch practically raped you for years, and in the end, she's the one who gave you what you wanted—Listen, I'm sorry that I can't give you any biological children, but we've got Dako, and we'll try to get Cecilia's and yours, too. I know you want a big family, and I'll give you that, Leo, if you just let me."

"Max, I…" Leo could not finish. He removed his inhaler from his pocket and breathed; he was hyperventilating, "What about your family?"

"They'll have to get over it," snapped Max. "You're done denying who you are; you're going to face the cops, and I'm going to be there with you. But I'm done pretending who I am, too. I'm through with pretending I just want to be your friend, Leo. I don't want to have just married you for money. If you want to hear 'I love you', then fine, I'll tell you…"

"Listen, I just don't know," Leo broke out of Max's grasp, and turned away from Zenigata, and looked out the small window to see the snowy exterior.

"Would you like the night think about it?" Max asked quietly, "I just… I want to know if I should stop chasing or not… I want to know if you're still in love with anyone, Leo."

"Still?" Leo asked, and looked back at Max curiously, "….Ryoko, you mean… Max, what happened between us was a long time ago. We've both moved on…"

"Could you answer a question, then?" asked Max.

"Sure, why not?" Leo shrugged his shoulders.

"Would you date someone judged on their looks? I mean, if you really got to know them, and you got along with them?"

"Well, no, I'm not racist or anything, and I have nothing against a disabled person. One godfather is blind and the other's got a gimpy heart, and my mom has back pains…" Leo shrugged.

"Why don't you quit judging me by looks, then?" asked Max. Leo was slightly taken aback by this, and remained silent. "You're one of those 'love is blind' people, so come on and stick to your beliefs, already."

"I knew love was blind, but I didn't know she was gender confused, too…" Leo said to himself out of Max's hearing range.

"I'm going to go lay down," Max sighed, and rubbed his forehead. He was quite aware of how much of a jackass he was acting like now, but it took a back burner to all of his emotions.

"Good night, Max," said Leo from the bathroom.

"Yeah… Good night…" Max grumbled, turning off their bedroom light.

_'Well, years with women, and still no luck… They say that there's someone for everyone, and maybe that's my someone… But **Max**? I used to be drinking buddies with Max, before he got all weird….' _Leo thought as he leaned against the bathroom doorway.

_'Maybe I'm getting a little weird….' _Max thought as he laid in his bed, _'I don't want to push him away, and I've already destroyed any tight relationship we had as friends…. Dammit, Zenigata, why'd you have to open your big fat mouth? You would've been fine if you hadn't shot off your mouth like that, and you two would be just as good friends as ever… I'd rather be alone and see him happy than to have him afraid of me… Maybe after this I'll seek a reassignment… I don't want to push him away….'_

_'Well, here goes everything… Maybe you'll like this, Ari. If not, hey, screw it, you've already erased Max's memory once, so it'd be easy to do again, and you already live with enough traumatic memories…' _Leo inhaled heavily, and walked over to Zenigata's bed, stood over it. Max rolled over, and looked up at Leo.

"Something wrong?" Max asked tiredly.

"No… I don't want to do anything too rash tonight, but um, is it okay if we share this one?" Leo asked hopefully.

"What, the bed?" Max choked.

"Thanks," Leo climbed in, all while Max remained wearing the same stunned expression. "If I snore, or start those weird dreams again, just punch me…"

"Yeah, sure," Max replied numbly. He didn't know what he had done to help Leo see his point of view, but it had sure worked.

Outside:

"So I guess Ryo's really out of the picture for him, now…." said a person dressed in all black as he sat perched outside Leo and Max's window. "Him and…. Well, that'll be a story to tell the kids… At least he probably won't kick my ass as severely… I'll get the girl, and the treasure of Rasputin, too…"


	14. Born to Run

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Lupin III, but on a happier note, I've finally got my high school diploma (yay!)

Bonjour!

Well, June 21st'll be a pretty special day—It marks two years that I've been working on this story! Wow… 114 chapters, 24 months… What a friggin' ride… At this point, I feel like I should be on payroll for the company who produces Lupin. My thanks again to everyone who's supported me, read this, written reviews, given ideas, given critiques, written fanfics, done fanart, cosplayed, helped me through writer's block, and been my friend during this. It's reasons like that why I'm still going… Enough nostalgia, let's get to the part you _actually _want to read…

Fun Fact of Boredom: Each character has a birth date… Well, not a year, because I've always tried to make this timeless, but the list is as follows…. Fuji, May 30; Ryo, February 24; Ally, March 28; Yukiko, December 10; Toshiro, April 25; Heiji, September 13; Odori, June 10; Leo, May 30; Max, October 19. Each birthday has its own meaning behind it, but that's for another segment.

Chapter Fourteen: Born to Run

A Small Inn in Siberia:

"Jeeze, I slept like a friggin' rock last night!" Leo said as he rose and stretched. He was slightly confused as he saw an arm over his chest, but then the memories came back to him. He shook Zenigata awake, but Max instead rolled and only tightened his grip over Leo.

"Ow, hey, Zenigata!" Leo gasped, and finally awoke the sleeping blonde.

"What, what?" Max asked with a groan.

"Time to get up," answered Leo, pointing to the time on his watch. He rose from bed, and went to searching for an outfit to wear for the morning. "I hope you slept well…"

"About as good as you did," Max answered.

"What's that mean?" Leo inquired as he walked to the bathroom with his usual attire and set to brushing his teeth.

"Last night was the soundest you've ever slept," Max replied, stretching and falling back into the bed. "Damn it's freezing here…"

"That's why they always threaten to send people here as punishment," Leo responded.

"Hey, LeBlanc, c'mere a second," Max waved his partner over, back into the small bedroom.

"What's up, Zenigata?" asked Leo as he walked out. He was in the middle of tying his orange tie when Zenigata waved him over.

"Lean in," Max ordered, "Closer, closer…"

"What is it, Max?" Leo sighed. Max grabbed Leo about the waist, and pulled him down onto the bed, and kissed him. Leo was more than a little surprise, and pushed Max away in shock, "What are you doing? We've got a job to do—We've got to catch Lupin!"

"Yeah, right…. Sorry…" Max cleared his throat, and rose from the bed. He looked down at Leo and asked, "You want to just forget about that?"

"Preferably… It's a little soon for anything like that… I'm still getting over the idea that I'm kissing someone who shares my aftershave," Leo sighed in response as he rose and adjusted his tie.

"Here… This always bothered me…" Max walked over to LeBlanc, and redid his partner's tie. "You always have it crooked, for some reason…. You're never…Eh…."

"….Go ahead… Say it… Straight…"

"Um, yeah…" Max coughed, and turned away from Leo, and into the bathroom. He emerged minutes later, wearing contacts instead of his usual glasses. "I've been thinking about staying with contacts…"

"Hmm, you do that, but I'll keep my Clark Kent look, thanks," Leo answered as he sat on the bed, tying his shoe. He looked up at Max as he continued, "From what I understand, you're the same person who told me he liked wearing glasses because they hid his face…"

"That's when I had stuff to hide. Now it's just me," replied Max.

"I've always been a little jealous about you in that respect, Zenigata. You don't really care as much as I do about what people think about you. It seems that in whatever direction I go, someone's mad at me…"

"You've got to learn that there's only one person you need to please in the end, Ari, and that's yourself," Max replied.

"….Did you just call me…."

"…Yeah… Sorry, I didn't even mean it," Max sputtered.

"No, it's fine," Leo rose and began to load his gun, which he had left on the table. "I'm just not used to being called that anymore. Who knows, maybe after all of this, you can call me Ari again. God knows that Ari and Leo are duking it out… It's a hell of a fight…"

"I hope that someday you'll both be able to get along," Max smiled wryly, and then turned his attention away from Leo and towards getting dressed. "Bring your parka, by the way—We got Fuji's scent, and she's headed towards a mountain range…"

"Couldn't she ever go somewhere simple? Wyoming, how about Wyoming? Or Montana… Nothing too dangerous there!" said Leo in his usual complaint.

Siberia:

"That's a hell of a mountain…" Yukiko said aloud as she stood with her colleagues at the base of the large snowy mountain in front of them.

"And in the center is Rasputin's diary…" Ryo added.

"Whelp, ya know what the Japanese word for mountain peak is—Fuji! So this ought to be a bit of good luck!" Fuji said with her usual optimistic smile.

"Yeah, and Yukiko means 'snow', but we all know how well I do in cold weather…" Yukiko grumbled.

"What does 'Toshiro' mean?" asked Toshiro earnestly.

"Lover of birds and masculine women," answered Ryo quickly and flatly as she tossed a grappling hook up and tugged on it to make sure of it security. Yukiko did the sisterly thing and mocked Ryo for this, but Jigen paid no attention to her older sister. As they started their ascent towards the top of the mountain, it became apparent that there was someone following them. In the heavy snowdrift it was hard to tell exactly who, but it became apparent quickly, and Fuji became quite concerned over this.

"Well, what do you say, 'Boss'? Give them the turn around?" asked Yukiko.

"Toshiro, why don't you give them a warning?" Fuji instructed. Toshiro nodded, and fell back from the group. The person behind them kept approaching, and Toshiro remained stationary while his group moved forward.

"Stop!" Toshiro barked. He was more than a little surprised when the mystery person retaliated and shot at him, grazing his parka. He lunged forward with his two swords drawn, and his new enemy quickly rolled out of the way. He spun about as the small person vanished, but was greeted with a blow to the back of the head from a good sized rock his attacker had picked up. He growled, and spun about to face his attacker, and finally managed to pin the assailant down by trapping his or her neck between his blades. He ripped off the ski mask, and was surprised to find a frightened young girl staring up at him, wide-eyed.

A Little Later:

"So all of this is for your sister?" Ryo repeated with shock.

"Yes," nodded Tanya as she sipped more of the scotch Yukiko had brought along gratefully. "She's sick… She has leukemia… My parents cannot afford the treatment, so I when I heard about the book, and all of its cures, it was too good an opportunity to pass up!"

"So you tried to turn me against Heiji and tricked me into coming all the way up this mountain so you could get that book for your own reasons…" Fuji concluded.

Tanya hung her head in response, "….Yes…"

Fuji laughed wildly, "What to go, kid! I like your style!"

"Wait… You aren't angry at me?" Tanya gasped.

"Ha! Are you kidding, if I had a dime for every time I've been backstabbed, I wouldn't even have to steal! But you're the first one to be such a sweetheart about it, I'll admit," Fuji said with a wide grin. "You've got a lot of chutzpah…"

"A lot of what?" asked Tanya.

"Ask Zenigata, he'll gladly explain it," Fuji replied.

"Who?" Tanya inquired.

"That angry snow-covered blond in the cave," Fuji pointed, and Yukiko and Toshiro immediately rose and drew their weapons as they saw none other than Zenigata and LeBlanc in the cave way.

"Chamila, great you could join us! C'mon, Blondie, pull up a chair, gather 'round the fire… Roast some marshmallows…" Fuji said, patting the warmed earth next to her.

"I'd rather see you roast in Hell, Lupin," said Max with a hiss.

"Well, like the Stones said, you can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you get what you need, and you and LeBlanc both look like you need a good dose of campfire singalongs!" Fuji smiled as she spoke to Zenigata.

"How come he gets a nickname and I don't?" Leo asked.

"If I told you I knew, Leo, I'd be lion—Hee hee hee hee! Hey, Zenigata, what's with the ring, huh? You get married?" Fuji asked as she removed a bag of marshmallows from her backpack and began to roast it over the fire with a twig she found on the ground.

"None of your business!" Max yelled.

"Ohhh…. Touchy, touchy… So, how much did you pay her? She speak English? She alive? She even a she?" Fuji asked. "Ouch… Little bastard…" she said under her breath as she waved the flames off of her marshmallow. She began to blow on it, and continued to wave it about. "Heiji, Veronica, marshmallow? Anyone? If I'm the only one eating I'll just feel like a fat ass…"

"I'll take one," said Heiji suddenly.

"Me, too," said Veronica.

"Okay… Find a couple of twigs and get closer," Fuji waved her friends over toward the fire.

"Why don't you take me seriously?" Max shouted.

"Don't take it personally, Zenigata… It's a family thing. If I didn't show you a lack of respect, I'd be a joke! And let's face it, it'd just be weird… It's like if you were married to my brother or something!"

"Dad told you?" Leo shrieked. Ryo nearly fell back in shock. Fuji's marshmallow fell into the fire, but the shocked Lupin didn't seem to take notice.

"…So…" Fuji cleared her throat, "Who was the bride?"

"Neither!" Max growled and clenched his fists.

"Oh…. Well, how was the wedding night, then? You know, I know that Ari's not like Dad in a lot of ways, but there's a reason that that Cecilia bitch liked him so much," Fuji chuckled.

"You don't need to be asking these questions!" Max flushed.

"Ohhh…. I'm sorry, I didn't realize that Ari wasn't giving out the goods… Damn, Zenigata, you have my apologies! You poor bastard… Ah, well, what can I say, there's one in every family.."

"I know you don't like killing, but could I please kill her?" Max asked intently.

"No, Zenigata," Leo sighed.

"Please, just this—"

"No, Zenigata," Leo repeated, and seated himself in front of Fuji and company. "Now would you please tell us what you're doing all the way up on a mountain in the middle of nowhere, Fujiko?"

"…Hm… I don't think I'll answer that, Ari," Fuji snapped.

"Why the hell not?" Leo asked.

"My birthday's tomorrow and you probably haven't even gotten me anything!" Fuji snapped angrily and rose, "How could you forget? It's your birthday, too!"

"Your birthday's tomorrow?" Max asked, turning to his partner. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Um… I forgot… No, honest!" Leo replied, holding his hands up in the air in defense. He turned to Fuji and said to her earnestly. "What's your game, Fuji? What are you doing up here, huh?"

"I'm on a mission of mercy," Fuji replied.

"That's a load of crap if I ever heard it…" Max grumbled, folding his arms and glaring down at Fuji suspiciously.

"No," Tanya interjected. "She's honest… She's looking for a book that will help my sister…"

"How do I know you're legit, Lupin?" Max asked.

"Because my two friends, Mr. Smith and Mr. Wesson, say so!" Yukiko snapped, drawing her gun and pointing to Max. Toshiro took her by the arm and desperately tried to calm her down while Veronica, Ryo and Heiji began to pack their supplies.

"Wait, where are you all going?" Max yelped.

"We're going to check out a book, then I'm thinking about swinging back around and getting some pizza…" Fuji said with her usual sarcasm as she took up her backpack and began to walk out of the cave.

"Wait!" Max ordered, "You're under arrest, Lupin!"

"You're under arrest, Lupin!" was repeated, but this time, it was coming from the glaring speaker of a helicopter, "Arsène Lupin the Fourth, you're under arrest!" the voice shouted.

"Arsène?" Fuji muttered. She quickly shuffled everyone back into the cave, right before they started shooting, "Jesus, Ari, what'd you DO?" Fuji shrieked.

"They found me," Leo choked. "I guess it's time I—"

"No friggin' way—They'll shoot you!" Max yelled in response.

"I've got an idea, but it depends on how much Veronica loves me!" Fuji shouted. Veronica turned to her, and gave a puzzled look in response. "Somebody gimme a parka, preferably purple!"

"Wait, they'll shoot me!" Veronica choked.

"Not the way I'm gonna do it," Fuji gave a wink, and soon Fujiko Lupin was outside of the cave, holding Leo LeBlanc at knife point.

"You don't shoot!" Fuji screamed to the helicopter. "You hear me, you bastards? And you try to take me, and I'll slit his throat! I don't friggin' care if he's my brother, you'll never take me!"

"Yes, Ma'am, just give us Lupin!" called the man in the helicopter.

Fuji did as they requested, and threw Leo to the ground. A puff of smoke blasted as they also lunged for Fuji, and she had vanished.

"Guess that this one'll have to do for now…" they muttered as they lifted Leo up and drug him onto the helicopter, "Take that tape off of his mouth…" Said one officer to another.

The officer did so, and they were more than shocked when the voice of an Indian woman began screaming, "They made me do it!" Veronica shrieked.

"She's a good actress," Ryo admitted as they watched the helicopter begin to circle about frantically. After growing frustrated, it rose, and departed.

"You should've let them take me…" Leo grumbled.

"What, you want me to shoot a flare their way?" Fuji yelled to her seemingly ungrateful brother. "I'm doing this because I love you, you idiot! Don't go acting like Mom, now's not the time!"

"I'm not, I'm acting like an adult!" Leo replied.

"You're acting like someone with a death wish!" out of anger, Fuji picked up a mound of snow, and threw it right at Leo.

"You've always been a real bitch, Fuji…" Leo snarled. Yukiko nudged Toshiro, and both took a step back. Toshiro grabbed Heiji by the shirt collar, and Yukiko moved Ryo back with her. Tanya took cover behind Toshiro, the tallest.

"At least I've always been honest to myself!" Fuji snapped in response as she threw another snowball, this time knocking off Leo's glasses. "You've always been weak, ya know that, Ari? It's always been me watching out for your ass over the years! You run away, and leave me with all of the responsibility!"

"You love doing this!"

"I loved it more when I had my partner!"

"Your partner's DEAD!" Leo shrieked, and caused some snow to trickle off of a nearby cliff. Leo noted Fuji's hurt expression, and looked away, embarrassed for having yelled at her like that, "Fuji, I… I'm so sorry…"

"Listen, if you're going to be a coward, then fine, Ari!" Fuji rubbed her eyes with her jacket sleeve. "I'm sick of you and your indecisiveness! You've got to decide who you are, and who you're going to hurt in the process…" her voice lowered with the following sentence, "I know you don't want to hurt anyone, Ari, but somebody's heart's gonna break. You can't help it…"

"Fine…" Leo took a few steps back and placed his hands in his parka. "Then I'll just go. Better everyone than only a few people…" he muttered, and turned away from them.

"LeBlanc, wait, you'll kill yourself!" Max called.

"I die no matter what road I take, Zenigata," Leo shot back, and was soon gone in the snowdrift. Max began to run after him, but he couldn't see Leo anywhere. He heard a crunch under his feet, and saw Leo's glasses, snapped in half.

"Why'd you let him run away like that!" Max shrieked, grabbing Fuji by the wrist and bending.

"Ow! Damn it, Zenigata!" Fuji yelped.

"Hey, you let her go! I don't care how we're related—I'll still kick your ass!" Heiji yelled, pulling Max away from Fuji.

"How could you leave him alone in that?" Max yelled, pointing to the dark snowdrift.

"Don't worry, Zeni-chan, I've got this under control… One of those snowballs had a homing device—You can track LeBlanc with this. Here's a flare—If you get lost, fire and we'll come get ya!" Fuji said as she regained her usual confidence and tossed Zenigata the two items.

Max looked down in shock and awe at the two devices in his hand, "But… Why are you doing this for me?"

Fuji shrugged, "'Cause my brother likes you. Have fun. If you get lost, just shoot the flare, remember…. Come on, guys, we've got a book to find!"

She began to trudge away with her company, and then turned back around to Max, and tossed him another case, "They're an extra pair of glasses, for Ari… I carry them, just in case."

"Thanks," Max said quietly. He then set his sights on finding his partner, and began to call Leo's name as he trudged through the snow.

"Well, you guys ready? I'm ready!" Fuji clapped her hands together for warmth, and they advanced deeper into the mountain range.

"How do we know where we're going?" asked Ryo.

"My Thieving Sense is tingling, that's how!" Fuji replied. "S'no problem, my tall friend…"

"If you make another pun, Fuji, especially after a dramatic scene like that, I'll kill you," said Ryo calmly.

They came upon a large door in the valley of several conjoining mountains, and Fuji gave a satisfied smile, "I think this is it…"

"Yes!" Tanya nodded wildly. "It is! This is it! My sister's saved!"

"Not yet, sweetheart… I've still got to crack this safe," Fuji began to feel about the door, and immediately froze as she felt a gun barrel at her back. "Yuki-san, this isn't a time for jokes…"

"Oh, if only I wish I were joking, Fuji, if only…" Yukiko said as she stood in a line with the other Lupin members and Tanya, all with their hands held high in the air. Ryo attempted to kick one of the guards unconscious, but he quickly grabbed her foot and threw her to the ground.

"Idiot!" growled the man who Fuji quickly presumed to be their leader. He slapped his lackey on the side of the head, and took a stance in front of Ryo. "Don't you dare lay a hand on her! Get them inside the tomb, quickly!" he demanded. The lackeys nodded, and the Lupin gang was led in, single file. There were lights strung up all through the cold cavern tunnels, and these gave off a yellow light. Fuji made sure to take a good assessment of her surroundings as she was led through the passageway, but not even she was prepared to turn a corner and come face-to-face with the mummified body of Gregory Rasputin. Tanya let out a scream of horror, and Toshiro and Heiji quickly made sure she was turned away from this gruesome sight.

"I love what you've done with the place, Gregory, although, if it were me, I would've added a waterbed and a few curtains…" said Fuji with a smirk.

"You always were the smart ass," said the voice beneath the heavy coats. He was the same bundled man who had saved Ryo, and Ryo could swear that she knew him from somewhere else. She just couldn't place where…

"Listen, we just want the book—We aren't even in it for money this time, Girl Scout's Honor!" said Fuji, raising her right hand.

"Heh, you were a girl scout and I was a ballerina," snapped the man.

"….Were the pirouettes hard for you?"

"Someone shut her up!" moaned the man.

"Hey, who are you, anyway?" Fuji inquired.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" he chuckled, "If you knew, then you'd really want to kill me…"

Ryo's eyes widened; she knew the voice. It was the man who had been stalking her, whoever that was… She smiled, for she knew that she would have this under control. She looked back at Fuji, and laughed, "What's it to a little whore like you, anyway, Fuji?"

"'Scuse me?" Fuji asked disbelievingly.

Ryo looked back at the masked figure, and approached him. She grew quite close to him, and even dropped her hands, "How about you let them go? Please? I know who you are…"

"You—you do?" he choked. "And you're not mad?"

"Nope," Ryo shook her head. "But I would be if you killed them… What do you say, fair trade? I give you what you want, and you give me what I want…"

"Wait, we want the book, too," Fuji added.

Ryo spun around, "Um, you're not really in a position to talk, princess…"

"Ryoko Diana Jigen…" Fuji said through gritted teeth, "You little…"

"You want the book, huh?" he ventured.

"Just one l'il page," Ryo replied, and ventured to place a hand atop his. It was immediately obvious that this made him uncomfortable, and he looked at Ryo.

"…Fine… Lupin will be allowed to have the page of her choosing, any may leave… But only one page, and you must stay," he said sternly.

"Fine by me," Ryo shrugged.

"R-Ryo-san…" Fuji yelped.

"Ryoko, you don't know what kind of a creep you're dealing with!" Yukiko shouted, "I know you hated Toshiro, but I hate this guy even more than you ever hated him!"

"Ryoko hated me?" Toshiro asked.

"Yup. A lot," Heiji nodded.

"Guards, see to them… Miss Jigen and I are going to talk," the masked figure led Ryo away, and the Lupin gang was left to their own devices.

The man led Ryo out of the cave, and into the campsite he and his lackeys had set up. There was a warm tent, and he led Ryo to this. Ryo immediately felt the warmth hit her, and undid her scarf a little.

"I'm glad you aren't mad at me…" he said with a sigh of relief, "I always thought that you'd… Well… Want to kill me…"

"Well, I don't know who you are, but I know you're my stalker," she admitted, and turned back around to face him. "I'd like to see who you are, though…"

"No, you don't want to," he backed away as she approached him, and fell down onto the floor of the tent. Ryo kneeled down beside him, and pinned him down by his shoulders. "Ryo, please, don't, you wouldn't understand!"

"Hmm… How worse can you be? My first boyfriend's gay," Ryo sighed as she undid his scarf. Something horribly familiar struck her as she looked at his mouth, but she couldn't exactly make out what it was. She leaned forward and kissed him, regardless, and then drew back, and removed his goggles. His eyes were striking blue… Wait…

"Oh, God…" she said as her mouth dried with horror. She removed his ski mask, and looked down at Victor Lupin, who stared back up at her with a look of unmistakable pain and regret. "Oh, God…" she placed a hand over her mouth, and sat back.

"Ryoko," he rose, and leaned forward, only to have her pull away from him.

"Don't touch me…" Ryo said as she shook her head. "You monster…"

"I told you…"

"Why… What game are you playing?" Ryo shouted.

"None!" Victor shook his head, "I really do have feelings for you! I, I… I have no game… If I had wanted to kill you, I would've a long time ago…"

"You're the reason Ari ran away! You killed that man, and he spent years thinking it was him! You destroyed the life of the only person who understood me, you bastard…"

"Ryoko, I'm sorry," he bowed as in Asian custom and looked back upward at her. "I can't have you forgive me, I know, but I'm only asking to understand you, if you'll let me. You're the first woman to ever, well, beat me at anything… I just couldn't let that go easily!"

"You sick son of a—What are you doing here, anyway, if you aren't interfering in my life?"

"Rasputin collected a fortune during his lifetime… I'm excavating," Victor admitted. "Ryo, please, could you just…"

He didn't have time to finish. There was the sound of helicopter propellers, and Ryo gulped, "Those are the people after Ari…"

She rose with Victor, and both stuck their heads out, "Where is he!" Victor shouted over the propellers.

"God only knows!" Ryo answered. "Victor, if you love me, you'll help me get Fuji and everyone out of here!"

Victor remained stationary with a shocked expression, his blue eyes wide, "That's against all of my principles…"

"If you really do feel anything for me, you'll do it," snapped Ryo sternly. Victor growled, and loaded his gun, and then lifted away a flap beneath his tent that led to a secret underground tunnel. He helped Ryo down, and the two made the journey back down to the grave of Rasputin.

"Ryo-san!" Fuji gaped in shocked, "And… Bastard… What's going on here?"

"No time to explain; those people who want Ari are here, and they'll arrest us too, if they catch us," said Ryo quickly. "Victor's going to help us escape…"

"What can we do? They're friggin' guns everywhere!" Fuji screamed. Just then, Heiji's watch sounded, and he looked down at it.

"Veronica, I love you…" Heiji said with a smile as he read over the numbers on the watch. These, he knew, would block the control systems of the computers on the helicopters. "She must've broken into their codes…"

"Remind me to send her a fruit basket," said Fuji. "How'll that help us, though, we don't have any computers!"

"Ahem," Victor nodded to the several computers set up inside the tomb, and Fuji glared.

"You're a showoff…" Fuji said sternly.

"Tanya, you're good at computers, right?" Heiji called to Tanya.

"Yep! Not as good as you, but I'll give it a try!" said Tanya as she jumped on a computer next to Heiji.

"Wait, so what do we do!" Yukiko yelled.

"We get the treasure," Fuji smiled as she laid her eyes upon the chests of treasure Victor and his team had already taken.

"Ohhhh no… My charity only extends so far… You go for that treasure, and you'll walk away with a few less fingers…"

"There's actually something you two can do," Heiji said. "They're footsoldiers coming…"

"And?" Toshiro inquired.

Heiji turned to Yukiko and Toshiro, and smiled, "Do what you two do best…"

"I was hoping this trip was going to get interesting!" Yukiko laughed, and pushed her fedora over her eyes.

"Heiji, you try to land a copter. We'll fly out of here," said Fuji.

"You got it," Heiji said numbly as he continued typing away madly.

"Hey, you two need a couple of more hands?" through the scramble of Victor's guards, Leo stood, leaning against Max. LeBlanc looked extremely tired, but willing to fight.

"Heh, why the hell not?" Fuji shrugged. "You two make sure these crooks of Victor's don't get hurt… Make arrests or something… Look important…"

"Okay," Max nodded.

"Zenigata, you get on that—I've got to make a phone call…" Leo ran from his partner, and towards an old-fashioned portable phone unit.

Paris:

"Allo?" Lupin inquired as he picked up his cell phone. He was immediately greeted with screams, explosions and gunshots on the other end.

"Hey! Dad!" Leo shouted.

"Ari, what the hell are you doing?" Lupin screamed over the clamoring in the background.

"I need you to take down these numbers… Take out all of the money in those accounts and put them into one for Dako!" Leo shouted.

"Okay, okay, gimme a sec to get a pen!" Lupin knocked over a few canisters in the process, but finally managed to find a pen and a sheet of paper, "What's going on over there, anyway?"

"The police have found me and you need to drain my accounts before the cops freeze them," replied Leo over the shouting.

"Wha?" Lupin discontinued writing, "You're letting yourself get caught?"

"Here, just listen to these numbers!" Leo shouted out a long train of numbers, and Lupin hurried scribbled them down. "And Dad?"

"Yeah?" Lupin inquired.

"I love you, and I love Mom, and I love Dako, too," Leo choked, and then hung up the phone.

"Wait, Ari—Ari?" Lupin yelled a few times, and then hung up the phone numbly.

"Lupin? Who was that?" Fujiko asked as she walked out, Dako holding onto one of her hands.

Lupin said nothing, but turned around and embraced Fujiko tightly. He then looked down at Dako, and lifted her up, and embraced her, too.

Siberia:

"We've got a plane!" Victor shouted to Ryo over the blinding snow. Many of the armed forces were either still being held off by the tired Toshiro and Yukiko or were already laying on the snow. It was a battle to get past the guards, but Fuji, Ryo, Heiji, Tanya, Yukiko and Toshiro managed. Max escaped with Leo through a different route.

The plane took off, leaving the battlefield behind. Ryo piloted the aircraft while Fuji acted as copilot to her friend. Yukiko and Toshiro passed out in a couple of chairs, exhausted, while Heiji went to getting them both water. Tanya looked away from the group sadly, and Fuji noted this, and turned her attention to the young girl.

"What's wrong?" asked Fuji, kneeling down in front of Tanya.

"There was no cure," Tanya wept, and wiped her eyes. "I don't know what I'm going to do now! We don't have the money to help her!"

And there Victor Lupin saw an opportunity to look good in the eyes of Ryoko Jigen, and came forward to Tanya with a small bag of gold coins, "You can use this to help her." He said to Tanya quietly. Fuji tumbled over in shock, and Tanya leapt up and embraced Victor, something he was quite unaccustomed to. He saw Ryo smiling in the reflection of the windshield, and he knew that although it had turned his insides to do the right thing, he was now a little farther in the graces of Ryo.

"I'd like to visit your sister…" Fuji said as she steadied herself. "Would that be all right with you, Tanya-chan?"

"I'd like that… And she would, too," Tanya gasped through a sob.

"I hope Ari's okay…" said Fuji to herself as she returned to her seat.

Down in the Mountains:

"Beautiful sunrise…" Leo muttered quietly as he and Max sat on a mountain edge, "Looks like the storm's past…"

"You don't have to do this," Max said to Leo.

"Yeah, I do… It's just something I feel is right…" Leo said as he bent his head down as he looked down at the mountain range, "They'll be here soon…" He kneeled next to Max, leaned in, and kissed Zenigata. He then felt a gun to his back, and held his hands up.

"Lupin the Fourth, you're under arrest," said the officer.

"All right, Officer," Leo nodded, and rose from the snow. "Please make sure that my partner gets home safely."

"Can do," the officer nodded, and looked down at Zenigata. "Inspector, someone'll be here to take you back to France soon."

"Bye, Inspector, it was nice being your partner," Leo said as he waved good-bye. Max rose, and saluted statuesquely as he watched Leo be handcuffed and led away to a police helicopter. Max had never felt emptier in his life as when he watched that helicopter rise and slowly fade out of vision.

Moscow:

Fuji bit her lower lip as she looked at the sad-looking girl in the hospital room, bald from the chemotherapy. She couldn't blame Yukiko for leaving, after seeing her mother supposedly die from the disease, and where Yukiko went, Toshiro went. They had gone back to New York, to meet baby Namiko. Heiji had stayed with Fuji, as had Veronica. Ryo was in France, preparing for the trial of Lupin the Fourth, as Fuji had instructed her. Veronica was back at the hotel, also preparing for the trial, after being released from the authorities after telling them that she had been brought to the Lupin gang against her will.

"This is my little sister… She is usually too tired to speak," Tanya whispered. She looked at Fuji, and squinted a little; something was different about her. "What happened to your hair? It's quite short…"

Fuji nodded, and silently handed Tanya's sister a plainly wrapped box. Anya needed help unwrapping the box, and both she and Tanya gasped as they pulled out a black wig, full of thick, wavy hair. Tanya helped her sister put the wig on, and Fuji tilted her head to a side, and nodded.

"You look better with it than I do!" Fuji chuckled.

"Thank you," Anya croaked weakly. During the coarse of this, Heiji stood in the back of the hospital room, too shocked to say anything.

"Well, this has been fun, but we've got to get goin', so I'll see you both around!" Fuji waved good-bye, and the two were soon gone.

"Fuji, that was… Amazing, to say the least," Heiji said in astonishment.

"Heh, I was thinking about getting a haircut, anyway!" Fuji waved this off, and exited the hospital wing with Heiji.

Paris:

Ryo rubbed her eyes tiredly, and played back the film once more… She had seen it about a million times, plus it went through her head every night. Fujiko's shoulders dropped as she saw her almost-daughter-in-law leaned on the desk, the screen reflecting upon her pale face. She approached Ryo, and laid a hand on her shoulders as she looked over the film.

"Any luck?" Fujiko asked.

"Not in the least…" Ryo said with a yawn. "I need a miracle…"

"Well, they come at the strangest times, Dear," Fujiko said reassuringly. The doorbell then rang, and Fujiko hurried out of the room to it. Ryo turned about as she heard footsteps, and she thought that it was Ari at first, and then realized that no, it was Victor. He walked towards Ryo, and tossed a gun down upon the table, along with a box of bullets.

"What is this?" asked Ryo as she looked down at the Walther.

"It took forever to find," Victor sighed heavily. "…It's the gun that killed the guard that Ari thought he killed…"

"Why are you doing this, Victor?" Ryo asked in a snap, "Do you think that I'll forgive you for everything you've done, now? That we'll start on a clean slate?"

"I've never been an idealist, my Dear…. Of course not," Victor smirked, nodded, and turned to leave. Ryo called Victor to halt, and he stopped, and she approached him, and kissed him on the cheek.

"Thanks, Victor," Ryo said quietly.

"Don't mention it… Please don't mention it," Victor said darkly, and exited the room with his hands in his pockets. He nearly knocked down Max on his way out of the mansion, and he wasted no time leaving the Lupin property. Max had just laid Dako down for the night, and now was to help Ryo in building their case for Leo.

He had broken the news to his mother earlier that morning. He had told her everything… How he had a child now, his marriage, his marriage to a man… The fact that it was a Lupin… She had remained silent for a long time, and then concocted a phony excuse, and hung up. He had told her, and now he would have to face his father. He rubbed his forehead at the thought; his head hurt him, but he would still help Ryo.

"Well, we've got him off of the murder charge… Now we need to think of a way to get him excused from everything else…" Ryo said as Max seated himself across from her, and looked down at his paperwork.

"I got funding for Leo today," Max added as he flipped through the thick files of paperwork Ryo had pieced together.

"How many people you screw for it?" asked Ryo. Max held up a single finger, and Ryo sighed tiredly, "Sorry about that, Zenigata…"

"It was okay… He was an ex, anyway," Max sighed tiredly.

"How'd your parents take it?" asked Ryo as she idled through some paperwork.

"I think I'll be spending the holidays with Lupin… I'm not sure if I'm welcome in my home, anymore," Max said with a gulp.

"Max, phone!" Lupin yelled.

"Who could that be? And at this time of night?" Ryo wondered.

Max rose from his rolling chair, and walked into the kitchen. It was his father, he realized with a shudder. He walked into the Lupin laundry room, and seated himself on the washer, "Hi, Dad…"

"Your mother told me," Zenigata said over the phone. "Why didn't you ever say anything to me?"

"What'd you want me to?" Max asked as he folded his legs beneath him and rested his head with a hand.

"Listen… I'm not mad at you about that…. I'mtoo old enough to really care a lot about tha anymore...I'm more upset that you didn't tell me," Zenigata sighed. "I guess I have to understand, though… Mother was mad enough when she found out that I had met someone white. She started yelling about WWII, and bombs, and loss of culture… I kinda zoned out after a while… I love the woman but God help her if she isn't missing a few marbles..."

Max laughed a little, "Yeah, Grandma'll do that to you… How was her birthday?"

"Not bad… One hundred and ten… Who would've thought?"

"Bitterness is a fuel you can run a _lonnnggg_ time on, Dad," Max said lightly. "Dad, I'm sorry…"

"A Lupin isn't a Lupin," said Zenigata suddenly.

"Um… Huh?"

"I've met that kid; it's BS that they're trying him now… Bambi's more threatening than him… I would've been more pissed had you hooked up with his floozy sister! He isn't like Lupin the Third… He's just trying to do the right thing… If I were twenty years younger, I would've kicked your ass for dating a Lupin, but I'm too old for that crap now…"

"Jeeze, those drugs really do calm you down!" Max muttered in disbelief. "Dad, I have a favor to ask you… I need help… I don't like asking for help, you know that, but it's for Leo."

"Whatever you want, Kiddo, I'll do it for you, you know that," said Zenigata. "You've got to promise me one thing, though, or else no deal."

"Whatever it is, Dad, sure," said Max suddenly.

"Once you bust that kid out, you two have a real wedding," said Zenigata. "I don't care if you have a priest, a preacher or a Rabbi there—You get someone. Your mother's seeing red because you didn't do anything more formal."

"But, Dad, I—"

"Promise…"

"Leo, he—"

"Maxwell…"

"Okay, Dad," Max sighed. "Love you, bye…"

"Bye," Zenigata responded, and hung up. Max then hung up, and walked back out to the kitchen. There was a long road ahead of him, if there were going to get Leo out… He didn't deserve it…. He may have been a Lupin, but Zenigata had been right, he wasn't a Lupin.


	15. Jailhouse Rock

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Lupin the Third, and if I did, I'd probably get the rights stolen, anyway…

You're probably wondering why the hell this is up so early,

Well, call it a spurt of enthusiasm for my craft. I felt really happy about the last chapter—Happier than I've felt in a long time about the quality of my work… For a few chapters, I felt like I was just… Floating… It probably sounds strange, yeah, I know… But that's honestly how I'm describe it! I guess with my anniversary coming up I'm just feeling a bit of a creative high. Well, thank you everyone who reviewed… Thanks again for everyone's reviews and your readership, it's so very appreciated!

Fun Fact of Boredom: If you notice, Fuji and Ari agree on one thing—They hate octopus. This is because if you're really into the obscure facts that no one cares about, you'll find the Lupin the Third has an octopus allergy. I'm going to go feel more like a nerd now and listen to some 1980's pop music…

Chapter Fifteen: Jailhouse Rock

Paris:

Frightened didn't begin to explain how Max felt as he walked through the prison doors, and was led to a room where he would wait for Leo to emerge. He had put away some of these crooks in his time, he recognized him, and by the names they shouted to him, they recognized him, too… He was in a glassed in room, with a small table and chairs, and an overhanging light. He had been on a different side of this table so many times before… And now…

His head shot up as he watched Leo walked out, chained by his hands and feet. He was in a classic orange jumpsuit, slippers, as well as a new pair of glasses. His hair had been cut a little shorter (and it was a little uneven, although Max would say nothing), and he was obviously weary as he sat in front of Zenigata. Max began to reach forward, but was quickly snapped at by the guard, and he seated himself again.

"You look like I feel," Max said with a faux laugh. Leo returned this feigned laughter, and looked down at his handcuffs.

"They don't seem to realize how easy it would be for me to get out of these…" Leo said with a shake of the head.

"Yeah, I'm surprised they didn't lead you out here with a leather mask on, Hannibal," replied Max. "How's everything been?"

"Lonely," Leo smirked a little. "No one talks to me… I may look like a mousy librarian, but I still look like my dad, and that's enough to scare anyone away… They either want to avoid me or fight me… I spend a lot of time knitting, now…"

"Dako made you this," Max removed a sheet of paper from his pocket and slid it across the table. It was a ten-year-old's rendition of himself, Max and herself, as well as something he didn't quite recognize… A much smaller child. Leo looked up at Max questioningly, and Max was quick to fill in the blank.

"She wants a baby brother," Max said with a small roll of the eyes.

"She knows that I'm here, right?" Leo asked.

"Yeah," Max nodded.

"How'd she take it?"

"After the crying, I told her that we had a lot of good people working on your case… The entire Lupin the Third gang, the entire Lupin the Fourth gang, Jake's company is funding it, and my dad's helping research for your case…"

"Jake?" Leo blinked a few times in surprise. "How'd you..?"

"Not any way you want to know," Max sighed, and looked down at his hands. "I want to do something nice when we get you out of here… I told my dad… About us…"

"How'd the old man take it?"

"We're getting married in a month, in California," Max announced.

"A month? Do you know how long it'll be before we go to trial?" Leo yelped.

"Not that long… It's a media frenzy… They have no choice but to push it forward… The first hearing's on Monday… They're going to try to get this done as soon as possible… This case is even blocking traffic… The country's pissed…"

Leo smirked, "If I'm making such a mess then they can get me out of here, if they want…"

"Your time's almost up," said the guard to Max.

Max nodded, and rose from his side of the table, "Is it okay if I…"

"No contact with the prisoner, Sir," said the guard.

"Right," Max nodded, and turned back to Leo. "This'll be over soon, Leo, I promise…"

"I know," Leo nodded. "Thanks, Max…"

"Bye, Leo," Max walked out of the room, and let out a gasp he had held up. Leo looked awful, there wasn't any other word for it… But beyond this, LeBlanc looked strangely at peace with himself.

Max would drive back to Lupin's now; he had been suspended with pay while the case went on. Interpol had nearly hit the roof when they had found out about their marriage, and Max, just like Leo had taught him, denied knowing that he was Lupin the Fourth. This was more for the sake of Dako, who would immediately have been taken away if not for lying.

"Too much lying…" Max said darkly as he exited the prison and hopped into his small car. He drove back to the Lupin estate, where it looked like a regular party with the numerous cars parked out front. Goemon was on the front porch with his granddaughter as well as two of his own children. It was a sad state for him to be meeting Namiko for the first time, but Ishikawa was overjoyed with her. Max was nearly toppled down by several more of the Ishikawa clan as he parked his car, and then he was nearly blown down by the two youngest Jigen children, who were now walking, or more precisely, running.

He managed to worm his way into the household, where Fuji, her father, and Max's father were occupied in the living room, going through more international laws.

"Heh… I didn't know that… I should've been paying taxes all these years!" Fuji said in true interest.

"You should've been behind bars all these years…" Zenigata said underneath his breath, followed by a sip of his Ramen noodles. Max cringed as he saw the noodles, and felt nausea come over him… Peanut butter, Ramen and Michael Keaton movies; they all made him nauseous.

"How's he doing in there?" Lupin inquired as he stood up to greet Max. Much like with his son, Lupin was about four inches taller than Max, and was somewhat intimidating as a result.

"We need to get him out of there," said Max quickly.

"I can tell you right now that they've got the wrong Lupin!" Zenigata screamed, pointing to an innocent-looking Fuji.

"Who? L'il ole me?" Fuji asked angelically.

"Oh, boy…. I don't know where you're going, Kid, but I am, too," said Lupin as he rose and walked into a room where Heiji was making stop motion frames of the infamous Ari-murder tape. Next to Heiji, in a bag, sat the gun and the bullets Victor had given to Ryo.

"Everyone's working on this case, huh?" Max said with surprise.

"Are you kidding? Yukiko's out back with her dad doing ballistics testing right now!" Lupin moved Max to a window, and sure enough, Jigen daughter and father were out back, talking with one another and carrying around guns as they paced about a target.

Outside:

"I hate Walthers…" Yukiko muttered as she and her father continued to change positions about the field. Jigen would play Ari, since the target was much closer and he would be able to fire with more ease, and Yukiko was Victor, who stood on a perch and away on a calculated distance.

"Hey, that was your first gun!" Jigen said with slight amusement in his voice. He lifted up the dummy, who fit the height and weight requirements of the shot man. "Okay, I know this'll help a lot, but what about everything else he's done, huh? He stole stuff, too, you know…"

"Lupin knows, and so does Fuji, and they're taking care of that. We're just doing what comes best to us," Yukiko replied as she made sure her gun was loaded. "You ready?"

"Whenever you are," replied Jigen. There was a countdown, and the two shot in unison. Jigen's bullet grazed the man's shoulder, but Yukiko went straight through at an angle that made it go straight through the man's chest. Jigen set the heavy dummy down and stretched. "Oi that guy weighed a lot! I'm surprised Ari didn't break anything fighting that guy…"

"We got our dummy?" Yukiko asked.

"Heh, yeah, both of 'um!" Jigen laughed as he looked up at Lupin from the window where the thief stood with Max. "You gotta hand it to him… If Ally had told me he had met another guy, I don't know what I would've done…"

"You would've loved him all the same. Don't lie to yourself, old man," Yukiko chuckled as she spun the handgun around and sheathed it back in her holster.

"You're probably right," Jigen sighed as he grabbed a camera and began snapping pictures of the dummy, Yukiko's position, where he had stood, etc. "Although I'm now to the point of wondering when I'm going to be a grandfather."

"Please no," Yukiko said to herself as she placed a hand over her eyes.

"Come on, can you blame me?" Jigen asked with a smile.

"Yes… You've got two little kids of your own! You're busy enough!" said Yukiko. "I'd be a horrible mother!"

"Hm. Just like I thought I'd be a horrible father…"

"Well, I never did get that pony, come to think of it…"

"Brat. At least you have a choice, and you'll get to see all of yours grow up. I didn't get to see you in your critical years, nor did I ever get to see Sachiko. It pretty much kills me inside…" Jigen said with a pang of regret.

"How's Sachiko helping, anyway? I heard it was pretty important," said Yukiko.

"She's Ari's defense lawyer."

"….Dad, you're kidding…"

"Nope."

"And that means she'll actually have to talk to…"

"Yep."

"Oh, boy," Yukiko sighed, and placed a hand over her forehead. "Poor Heiji…"

Late that Night:

"I figured you were nocturnal, Sachiko," Heiji said as Sachiko entered. She looked less than amused by this, and ignored Ishikawa's curt greeting. She seated herself next to Heiji, and the chair creaked back. "Heh, put on a little weight?" Heiji inquired.

"You, too?" Sachiko quickly returned. Now Heiji shot the glare, and Sachiko had the smile of satisfaction.

"Ouch, Sachi… That was mature," Heiji said with a roll of the eyes.

"Are you sure I'm not making your girlfriend jealous?"

"Veronica's getting married," Heiji said flatly in response.

"Not her; Fujiko," Sachiko said while she picked up a parcel of case papers.

"Fuji's mom? Gross!"

"The young Fujiko. Smart ass," Sachiko grumbled.

"She isn't my girlfriend," Heiji stated defensively as he resumed typing upon his computer. "How's your girlfriend, on that note?"

"I'm not a lesbian."

"Men usually aren't."

Sachiko tossed the files down and stared Heiji down from above her glasses, "You know, I'm working at an attorney's right now… They all treat me with respect…"

"Good for them," Heiji said distantly. He didn't notice Sachiko rise, or hear her close and lock his door behind him. He didn't even notice where she hid the key. He did begin to notice, however, when he slammed his laptop down in front of him. He looked up at her questioningly and noticed that she had undone her hair; she never had undone her hair. She was also missing her glasses.

"You're the only bastard who's ever told me how it is," Sachiko said to a speechless Heiji.

"What… Um… Case…" Heiji sputtered as he laid a hand on his laptop. Sachiko's hand followed his, and landed atop his, leaving Heiji stunned once more.

"You know, I even sort of liked you before you lost all of that weight…" Sachiko said quietly.

"Eh, I've gotta get some disks from downstairs," Heiji said with a crack in his voice as he quickly rose and left Sachiko, only to find the door locked. "Great…" he grumbled, "I'm starting to think that it was better when I was a fat and no one really paid attention to me… I sure as hell had more time to play _Quake_…"

"Just stop there, Ishikawa," said Sachiko sternly.

"What'd you do with the key, Sachiko?" Heiji asked as he turned the doorknob and moaned.

"You'll have to find out," Sachiko pounced upon him, and Heiji let out a yell, and there was a loud thump. Jigen, who was one story below, stopped and looked upward at the ceiling. He had been watching a game show with Goemon, and Ishikawa also noted this disturbance, and raised an eyebrow to this sound.

Upstairs, Heiji finally managed to calm down Sachiko, "Listen, we'll go out after we get this case done… I promise, okay?"

"All right, but no breaking promises," Sachiko smirked, and seated herself back in her chair. Heiji also crawled back into his seat, and resumed typing on his computer, and trying to act as though nothing had just happened.

A Paris Prison:

"Lights out!" barked the guard. Leo grumbled; he had been enjoying his book a great deal until then. It was like home in that respect, though… Max didn't like the lights on at a certain time, either. He reached over and switched off the light, and turned over to sleep. His eyes met with the drawing Dako had drawn, and his heart sank. He could always escape, but then they would be on the run… He couldn't do that to Max or Dako, or anyone. He would be safe in Cagliostro, but he couldn't just relocate them; it would be unfair.

He was drawn out of his thoughts as he heard something, like sobbing. It was indeed sobbing, he realized, and he looked down below at the bunk below him. His roommate was new; he had just come that day.

Leo asked, "Est-ce que vous d'accord?"

"Yo no comprende," the man responded.

"Ah… Tu habla espagnol?" Leo inquired.

"Si. Et tu?"

"Si. Yo habla espagnol. Mi llamo Ari Lupin," said Leo. "Et tu es?"

"Mi llamo Manuel," replied Manuel.

"Tu habla angles?"

"Si," Manuel nodded.

"Bueno… Muey bueno… So why are you here, Manuel?" asked Leo as he jumped off of his bump and seated himself next to Manuel. Manuel jumped back, and scooted away from Leo, and LeBlanc gave a heavy sigh. "I'm not going to hurt you, Manuel. I'm not a monster, as opposed to popular belief. I'm a person."

"They say you are a devil," said Manuel.

"Hmm… Is that what they say, eh?" Leo sighed and stretched, "Well I'm not… I just made a few mistakes along the way… How did you get here? You must've done something bad to end up in a place like this, Manuel."

"I… I do not want to talk about it," Manuel shook his head. Leo looked at the young boy sympathetically; he could not have been more than twenty, at the most. Add in the fact that he was lanky and effeminate, and that equaled fresh meat for many prisoners.

"You need a friend, huh, Manuel?" Leo inquired.

"Well… Yes," Manuel nodded in response after a pause.

"I'll be your friend, all right? No strings attached, promise," said Leo, holding out his hand. Manuel looked at him suspiciously before holding out his hand and shaking it.

"Thank you," Manuel embraced Leo tightly after they let their joined hands break.

Manuel was like a fountain of words once Leo decided that they should be friends, and he pulled out a small worn picture, "Look, I will show you… This is my Mama, and this is my Papa…. This is my brother, Ricardo."

"Who's this?" Leo asked as he pointed to a young girl in the photo.

"Oh," Manuel blushed a little and smiled. "This is my girlfriend, Rosalia…"

"She's gorgeous," said Leo in a mutter. "Where do they live?"

"In a small town, near Havana," replied Manuel.

"Ohhh… So you're a Cubano, huh?" Leo nodded with realization, "Cuba is a nice place…"

"For a foreigner, yes, it is nice," Manuel replied. "You have a family?"

"Yeah—Here, I'll show you a drawing," Leo climbed back atop his bed, and pulled down Dako's drawing. "Here it is… This is my daughter, Dako… She's an American who we adopted… And this little baby in the photo is the little brother she wants…"

"Who is the man?" inquired Manuel as he pointed to Max.

Leo gave a small sigh; he knew this would happen, "That's my husband… We're both…"

"Oh, okay," this registered with Manuel quickly. "My brother is like you. I do not understand it, but whatever you like…"

"Good… I'm glad you're okay with that, Manuel."

"Hey, not my life," Manuel shrugged. He turned to Leo, "Maybe we sleep now?"

"Sounds good…" Leo yawned, and climbed back up to his bunk. "G'night, Manuel…"

"Good night, Ari," Manuel responded. "Thank you…"

The next week:

"I hope she knows what she's doing…" Fujiko said with worry as she prepared for the trial with Lupin.

"Don't worry…. She's a Lupin, we're always crafty!" replied Lupin confidently. "The prosecutor's calling up Max today… Poor kid's in shambles!"

"I would be, too," Fujiko admitted. "Who's staying with the kids?"

"Natasha and Amaya offered… Amaya's the only one who can handle those kids, and Natasha's too nervous for Max to go…" said Lupin as he adjusted his tie and looked in the mirror. "Ally's going to be running late, too. He's bringing a star witness from the airport."

"Well, let's get going," Fujiko gave one last look to Lupin before they walked down the stairs and to the Alfa Romeo. Ryo was in the driver's seat, and Zenigata sat next to her in the front seat. Lupin and Fujiko climbed in the back, and Ryo drove them down to the courthouse, where Zenigata had to fight off more than a few reporters. The old man proved that even in his winter years he could still rough up a person or two when need be.

The courtroom was quickly filled up, the original Lupin gang seated together in the front of the defense side. The Lupin the Fourth gang was nowhere to be seen. At the defense table sat Sachiko Jigen and Puja (Veronica) Patel, and on the prosecutor's side, France's best attorney.

"So, when did you get your degree again?" Veronica whispered.

"I, um… Last year," Sachiko whispered. "I took online courses…"

"What!" Veronica yelped.

"Don't worry—I've got it under control…"

"I certainly hope so," Veronica said as she eased back stiffly into her chair.

The entire court rose as the judge entered, and then Leo LeBlanc was led out, and placed at the defense table. Fujiko had to hold back crying as she saw that he had been handcuffed by his feet and hands. He also wore a black eye from where he had attempted to protect Manuel earlier that morning.

Max was called first. He was eaten alive by the prosecutor, who was named Rostand.

"How long have you known Mr. Lupin?" asked Rostand as he paced back and forth. He was a middle-aged, dark haired Frenchman with a leer and a hate for any sort of injustice whatsoever.

"About four years," Max answered uneasily into the microphone.

"And what is the nature of yours and Mr. Lupin's relationship?"

"Well, we're both inspectors for Interpol."

"And beyond that? What other sort of relationship do you have with Mr. Lupin?"

"Hey, good thing is, the judge is a woman, and she can't accuse you of being a womanizer, like they tried with me," Lupin whispered to his unnerved son.

"We're married," Max cleared his throat, and felt his face redden. He caught glimpse of his father, and immediately averted his eyes back to Rostand.

"So, it's to be assumed then that you two have engaged in that which comes with marriage?"

"No," Max shook his head.

"No?" Rostand snapped his head back around to Max; oh, this was good… He was onto something very good indeed. "Well, why not?"

"Excuse me, is this really relevant?" Leo shrieked as he rose from his seat. "My career's on trial, not my love life!"

"Mr. Lupin, please retain your seat," sighed the judge tiredly. "Counselor, are you going anywhere with this?"

"Simply trying to get a good idea of the character of the criminal, Your Honor," replied Rostand. "Now, Mr. Zenigata, why is that?"

"Well," Max looked at Leo, and gave a small smile. "We just didn't want to… You don't need to sleep with someone to show you love them. Mr. Le—Mr. Lupin proved that…"

"And how'd he do this?" asked Rostand.

"We took care of our daughter together. We'd take her to the park, the zoo…. Ari's parents would watch her when we were away. He's done other things, too. He let me move in when I had nowhere to live. He's saved my life numerous times, and he's done it all out of the kindness of his heart!"

"Are you aware of his relationship with Ms. Cecilia Lockwood?"

"Yeah, of course! She had him wrapped around her finger for years! She always threatened him… She's a manipulator!"

Cecilia, who was sitting at the prosecutor's table, glared at Max. Leo, for the first time, noticed her. She was quite pregnant… He just couldn't believe that it was his…

"Mr. Zenigata, when did you find out the true nature of Mr. LeBlanc?" asked Rostand.

Max gulped hard; he would tell the truth, "Well, from what I understand it was when Mr. Victor Lupin stole a diamond… I had my memory wiped, though, so I couldn't remember… Mr. Lupin the Third told me…"

"And we all know how good Mr. Lupin is at the truth," Rostand muttered. Lupin's grip on the court bench tightened a little at this, although he was more mad about what Rostand was trying to make his son out to be.

"So, since you're married to a man, it's safe to say that you're…"

"Bisexual, yes," Max snapped. He could see the reporters scribbling on their notepads; now they would never let his father live this down… Max felt a great deal of guilt; his father had worked so hard for his reputation, especially when Lupin had made him look like an idiot year after year, and now he had ruined it all.

"And from what I understand you have a criminal past, too…" said Rostand.

The questioning continued for what seemed like forever for Max. The defense did a decent job of turning things around, but damage had already been done. Max felt like he was going to pass out as he walked down the stairs and back into the crowd. There were reporters yelling to him for interviews, but Max's father politely turned around and told them to stick their notepads where the sun's light wouldn't fall upon them.

Cecilia Lockwood was next. She took the stand with an arrogant air. She smiled as she seated herself comfortably in the courtroom chair, and looked at Rostand with a knowing smile.

"And, Miss, what connection do you have to Mr. Lupin?" asked Rostand.

"I'm the mother of his child, as well as his former employer," replied Cecilia.

She went on to twist her story like she were making a pretzel. A few times the passive Leo had felt tempted to throw his chair at her, but he resisted. Sachiko informed him that it wouldn't help his case any.

Sachiko then rose to question Cecilia, and Cecilia's arrogance and shrewdness were nothing compared to Sachiko, who could look truly cold-blooded if need be. Leo switched from rage to a sense of amusement as Sachiko grilled Cecilia.

Sachiko even went as far to show the tape that Leo had taken (Lupin had taped this long ago to prove that his son was indeed straight, but since he no longer had any use, he turned it over to Sachiko). Cecilia slunk back down in her seat while this was played. Before, the prosecutor only had a tape with the video, but no soundtrack. The sound gave the tape its full meaning, and showed Cecilia's true colors.

"What do you make of this? It sounds as though you're… Threatening to tell people that he's Lupin the Fourth…" Sachiko cocked her head to a side and gave a small chuckle. "Funny, isn't it, because you know, if that were so, you'd probably face jail time for allowing one of your most wanted criminals reside in Interpol!"

"Mr. Lupin and I had an understanding… We…" Cecilia sputtered.

"By the way, Miss Lockwood, how'd you find out the DNA of the baby? The only test available for an infant during pregnancy would be extremely dangerous, and would probably result in brain damage, at least… But that's just what Dr. Patel tells me, and she's only got three medical degrees, and only comes from an entire family of doctors…"

"You lousy bitch…" Leo hissed through gritted teeth.

After a little more grilling, the defense brought up its witnesses. Among them were Leo's coworkers, Carmen and Clarisse of Cagliostro, Tanya (from Russia), Leo's mother and father, Max's father, and finally Dako, who was brought over later in the afternoon. The usually sharp Dako spared no wrath or sarcasm on Rostand. Sachiko found it curious that the prosecution had not called up anyone that Leo had stolen from. It was then that Veronica informed her that the people Leo had stolen from would not come forward because he had returned everything he had stolen from them, with interest. Either that or he had stolen from criminals, and they would not come forward.

"Are you aware of your… Fathers'…. Relationship?" asked Rostand.

"I'm an American—We've got them running all over the place!" Dako snorted.

"Did you know that Mr. LeBlanc was indeed Mr. Lupin?" asked Rostand.

Dako shrugged, "I know he's Lupin, but he's not a Lupin to me… I mean, c'mon look at him compared to his dad! Grandpa's got a real straight posture, and Leo's all hunched over… They look alike, but you can just tell that they aren't alike… Plus Leo likes guys, and Lupin was only married to a guy once, and he swore nothing happened…"

The crowd gave a chuckle, and Lupin gave a nervous laugh in return.

"How'd she know about that?" Lupin asked Fujiko through an embarrassed smile.

"She found a picture and was curious," Fujiko shrugged.

"Leo and his sister are really cool… I like Aunt Fuji…" said Dako.

"So you've met Fujiko Lupin?" Rostand spun about and looked at her intently.

"No, but she sends me stuff from all over the world… I just got a real fur coat from Russia…" said Dako. "And yes, she packs in receipts to prove she paid… Would you like to see them?"

The audience gave another howl of laughter, and Max and Leo looked at one another and smiled.

"No… That's quite all right…" Rostand grumbled. He then allowed the defense to have Dako, and she put on her angelic face for Sachiko.

The trial took over two weeks in length… Jigen went over his ballistics results, and Sachiko made use of the presentation Heiji had pieced together. On the last day, there was quite a surprise—Fuji made an appearance. Well, at least partially. When Max jumped over a table to arrest her, he found that she was only a hologram.

"I'm here to answer any questions, Your Honor," said Fuji with a wide smile.

"We'll take her…." Rostand grumbled tiredly, rising. His case had fallen apart in a matter of weeks… And he had the feeling that Fuji Lupin had something to do with it.

Fuji took the stand, and told Rostand and the judge of how she had always forced Leo along on their thieving trips, and he only went most of the time to make sure she didn't get killed. She painted a picture where she had forced Leo along on everything, and Leo never wanted to kiss his sister so much in his life.

The defense had no questions for Fuji; she had done enough on her own. Rostand was mere seconds away from tearing his case files in half and walking out, stating he was bound for Belgium. His case had started to go downhill when Leo showed them just how easily he could escape from prison; Rostand was convinced that Leo wasn't as much a thief, but just a plain idiot.

"I'll make my ruling in my chambers," the judge announced, rising and leaving.

Leo turned back around to face his family, all who were obviously nervous, "I've never been this on edge in my life!" Leo admitted with a faint chuckle.

"Well, if this doesn't work, I'll just have Goemon and Jigen ram a car through the prison and bust you out…" muttered Lupin. "Nothing we haven't done before…"

The judge was gone for a half of an hour, and Leo remained standing as she read her ruling.

"Mr. Lupin… It is clear to me that during the course of your life, you've committed numerous crimes…" the judge started, "And you know that crimes must not go unpunished…"

Leo's heart sank. What had gone wrong? He had thought that Sachiko and Veronica had done so well!

"But among your crimes, you're not guilty for murder," said the judge. "Now, moving on to the numerous counts of breaking and entering…. It seems your friends have been busy over the past few weeks collecting statements from every single person you've ever taken anything from… They're in many different languages, but they all have the same message. You apparently paid them back out of your own wallet, and you also took up a job at a government agency to pay back your debt, from what I understand… So for the crimes of kidnapping, breaking and entering, and petty and felony robbery you are pardoned…"

Lupin, Fujiko and the rest of the Lupin family breathed a sigh of relief.

"Now for impersonating an officer…" the judged continued, "You did go through proper police training, only under a false name. So I am ordering you to choose one name. You may either be known from this day forward as Leonard LeBlanc or Arsène Lupin the Fourth. Due to your superb thieving skills and your ability to make good use of them, I also request that you return to work at Interpol, and continue to work on your case with Inspector Zenigata. You're a valuable asset to this community, Mr. Lupin, and it would be a waste to let you sit in prison."

"I don't have to go to jail, then?" Leo said meekly.

"Not unless you want to," the judge smiled in return. "You've got a lovely daughter, Mr. Lupin… Make sure she stays in school, and don't teach her any thieving skills… Neither you nor her father. And as for you, Miss Lockwood, you're going to be put up for investigation for child endangerment… Mr. Lupin's already set up a petition to get custody of the child…"

"You WHAT?" Max and Cecilia shrieked in Leo's direction.

"Court is adjourned," the 'judge' rose, and smiled as she looked down beneath her desk at the real judge, who was bound and gagged and had Odori next to her holding a sword. At this point Leo noticed the judge had grown a little in height, and the bailiffs looked suspiciously like Ally and Toshiro, but he said nothing, and waited anxiously as they removed his bindings. He embraced Max, and then lifted up Dako, and laughed. He was really free.

"I hope he appreciates us after for this," the judge said in a very Ryo-like voice as she exited back into her chamber.

"How'd it go?" asked Fuji from her seat on the couch in the judge's office. Heiji was fiddling with the hologram machine which had made her appear so real in the courtroom while Yukiko watched after Namiko in one corner of the room. Odori walked out after the court had cleared, leading the judge by her bindings.

"Now, Your Honor, may I just say what a pleasure it is to meet you?" Fuji said as she shook the stunned judge's hand. "And I see you've met Odori Ishikawa… Now, if you breathe one word of what we did today, Odori is my reassurance… Reassurance that you won't have a hand to bang that gavel with when she finishes… And you see that baby over there? That may look like an innocent baby, but that's Odori's daughter, and someday she's going to be just as good a swordswoman as her mother. So this is a friendly reminder to watch your back… Okay?" Fuji smiled brightly, and patted the judge on the shoulder. "C'mon guys, let's go…" She nodded, and the Lupin gang filed out of the court officer. Odori undid the judge's bindings with a few swipes of the sword, and then picked up her daughter, and proceeded to supply Namiko with her favorite chew toy.

"Grandfather's going to be mad that I took you with me, Namiko-chan, but I couldn't just leave you!" said Odori as she cradled the baby in her arms.

"How's she doin', huh?" Ally asked as he removed his guard's hat and tossed it aside. "Hey there, Nami—You wanna meet my girlfriend later? She'll adore you!"

"Yeah, the kid's cute… I kinda wanna keep her," Yukiko admitted.

"Heh, you've got Toshiro—Go get one of your own," Odori replied.

"That'd involve somebody getting an early Christmas present," Yukiko smirked. Toshiro flushed and wordlessly mounted his Vespa, and the two took off for home.

The Lupin gang headed for home, and there was a large celebration already set up. Apparently Lupin had been more than confident of his son's freedom. Ironically, the only ones not present were Leo, Max and Dako. Leo took the rest of his family to meet his friend, whom he had saved more than once in his weeks in prison.

"I heard you were out! Congratulations!" said Manuel as he and Leo sat on opposite sides of a glass wall, Leo with a telephone in his hand.

"Yeah," Leo chuckled, and looked back at Max. "Manuel, this is my husband, and this is my daughter."

"Where's the baby?" asked Manuel.

"Even he knew?" Max asked Leo in an accusatory tone.

"The baby's on its way, Manuel," Leo answered with a nervous smile as he looked up at Max out of the corner of his eye.

"Ari, could I talk to just you for a minute?" asked Manuel, "No offense, but…"

"Not a problem. We'll hit the vending machines," Max waved goodbye, took Dako by the hand, and walked out.

"I want my own weight in Cheetos," Dako announced to Max.

"Yeah, right," Max snorted.

"What's up, Manuel?" asked Leo, leaning inward.

"Rostand… You know how he not lose any cases?" Manuel whispered.

"Yeah," Leo nodded.

"He knew he might lose to you, because you are so well-liked. He hire me to kill you…"

"What!" Leo gasped.

"Si, it's true," Manuel whispered. "I did it to get my family out of Cuba… You were so nice, though! I… I couldn't do it!"

"Manuel, thank you!" Leo sputtered, "But, but what about your family?"

"You kidding—With a lawyer like you had, I'll hire her!" Manuel chuckled. "You think she will take me?"

"Of course! And if you're ever in France, and not, well, here, look me up, okay?" Leo asked intently.

"You got it," Manuel responded, and watched as Leo hung up the phone, and walked out of the room, and out of the prison.

"So, Mr. LeBlanc, no more running from the cops… Or should I call you Mr. Lupin?" Max asked as he drove them home. Dako sat in the passenger seat, several bags of Cheetos surrounding her, while Leo opted for the back seat.

"I haven't decided yet—Dako?" asked Leo.

"I dunno—Ari's a cute name, though. I want my little brother to be named Ari…" said Dako.

"What about Max?" asked Zenigata.

"I had a _dog _named Max…" Dako sighed. She turned back to Leo, and noted his haircut, "Um… Could you let Max give you a haircut before the wedding, okay?"

"Why?" asked Leo.

"No reason," Dako shrugged, and turned back around in her seat.

Later that Night:

"How do I look?" asked Leo as Max tossed aside his scissors.

"Just like someone who's fresh from prison," Max responded. "So I guess this means I have to break it to Dako that most of that money in that account I set up for her is going back to you, don't I?"

"Well, put half back in mine… Save a good amount for college, and leave some in there for her," said Leo as he brushed his hands through his hair.

"You sure about that?"

"Of course! I want her to have the best… I did, and I do," Leo said as he looked up at Max. Zenigata gave a questioning look, but Leo rose and dusted himself off before Max could get a decent reading of his features. "Hey, where's Dako?"

"Asleep," Max replied. Zenigata made a half-assed effort of cleaning up the bathroom before following Leo out to their room. Leo was undoing his black tie—The matching black jacket lay upon a desk chair. He had switched from his usual flambouent attire to a black suit which the prison had supplied him with, and he had found the suit incredibly uncomfortable during the trial, and he couldn't wait to get out of it.

"You want me to step out for a minute while you change?" Max asked.

"Nah, I'm fine," Leo replied as he unbuttoned his shirt.

_'Yeah, I'm the one who's not…' _Max gulped dryly, and approached Leo slowly and uncomfortably. "Listen, I, um…"

"Hm, you need some fresh air, Zenigata?" Leo asked with a tilt of the head.

"Yeah… Really bad," Max muttered as he stared at the floor. LeBlanc approached a window, and opened it, and looked back at Max.

"Better?" Leo asked in his usual doe-eyed naiveté.

"Not really," Max admitted as he seated himself on his bed, and switched on his television. He had to get his mind away, far, far away.

"You know, I missed so much stuff… Stuff I thought I'd never miss… Warm showers, my own bed with a comfortable mattress… All of that stuff!" Leo laughed as he pulled open a drawer in search of pajamas. "I missed you and Dako, too, you know… I felt kind of bad about what I did to you that one night… It was the last peaceful night we had together for a month, from what I understand… I took advantage of you, Zenigata, and that's not in my character…"

Max was trying hard to concentrate on the Volvo commercial in front of him, but found it hard. Leo… Just… Kept… Talking…

"I want to make it up to you, in short," Max caught a hold of this, but make up for what?

"LeBlanc, what are you talking about?" asked Max in his usual sternness.

"Call me Ari, please," Ari said as he leaned down and kissed Max. Max fell back, and looked up at Ari, a little too surprised to call him anything, really.

"Okay… Ari… I…"

"You talk too much, Blondie," Ari chuckled. "Don't look a gift horse in the mouth, okay?"

"Wha…?" Max sat up in his bed, and was left slack-jawed, "Are you saying…?"

"Yep," Ari nodded, reached over, and turned off the lamp.

That morning:

Dako awoke to the sound of the TV blaring, "Why in the heck are they listening to it so loud? I know that they're both blind, but that doesn't mean that they're both deaf, too!" she grumbled, rose, and stumbled to their door. She banged on their room, and she heard the familiar cursing of her fathers. Leo answered the door after a few moments, wearing a black and white kimono.

"Dako—What can we do for you, Sweetie?" asked Leo nervously.

"Why's the TV so loud?" Dako asked. She looked past Leo, and noted an unusually smug Max still in bed. She then looked up at Leo, and things pieced together, "Ohhhh…. Hey, um, I'm gonna go rot my brains on cartoons…"

"That'd be a good idea, Honey," Leo pulled his kimono closer, and closed the door as the little girl exited.

"She gone?" Max asked.

"Yeah… I think she figured out what was going on, though," Leo sighed and seated himself on the edge of his bed. "I should go out there and start with breakfast…"

"You're just saying that so I get out there… You know I hate your cooking…" Max mumbled to Leo.

"Well, just maybe…" Leo admitted sheepishly.

"Hey, you chose a name yet? Last night it was Ari, now today it sounds like whatever goes," Max inquired.

"No, not yet…" Leo admitted as he laid down on the bed. "You wanna lend a hand?"

"How about Ari Zenigata?" Max suggested.

"Nah…"

"Leo Lupin?"

"Eh…"

"Ari LeBlanc?"

"That one's not so bad…"

"Leo Zenigata?"

"A little much… I don't know…"

"Hey!" Dako began banging on the door once again, "Are you guys making breakfast, or am I foraging!"

"We could let her order a pizza…" Max said with a yawn.

"Nah… Don't be lazy… Let's make her breakfast… Then we'll get to work…"

"…Define 'work'."

"I can't tell if that comment was made to make you sound lazy or even more perverted, but it worked," Leo gave Max a small whack on the shoulder, and then rose. "Come on… I'm lucky I still have my job—I'm actually happy to go to work!"

"How's pancakes for breakfast?"

"Could you make waffles? I missed waffles, too," Leo said intently.

"Well… Okay… But do you know how long it'll be before I find the waffle iron?"

"You'll do it out of love," Leo replied quickly. Max gave a roll of the eyes, and exited the bedroom. Leo could hear Dako from the exterior rooms—He was glad that he could hear the usual sounds of home once again…

He knew that Fuji had had a hand in his being set free, and although he wasn't sure what it was, he was positive that she had done it because in all actuality she wouldn't have it any other way—Her brother and his husband chasing after her, and she running around the world, stealing and occasionally helping those in need.

"Good to be back," he said aloud as he walked out into the kitchen.

_Okay… Special author's P.S.: I really don't know what to do about Leo's name! Should it stay Leo LeBlanc, or go back to Ari Lupin? Maybe a combo of the both? Could I please get some honest opinions on this—I know it seems silly, but it really is important to me, and I'm in such a rut right now… Thanks…_


	16. Love Boat

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Lupin the Third, and…. Yeah… He's not even really in this chapter, anyway….

Oye, over here! Yeah, here!

Thank you to everybody who reviewed in the last chapter! Thanks also to the people who read it, even though you might not review… I know you're there… Anyway, yeah, I still can't decide on an official name for Leo/Ari, although I've gotten some pretty good ideas. Thanks everyone! I'll have an idea by the Ari/Leo wedding, promise… Anyway, please enjoy the next chapter, and remember that opinions are always welcome!

Fun Fact of Boredom: The red-headed version of Toshiro is based after a piece of artwork a friend sent to me… I thought Goemon looked good as a redhead…

Chapter Sixteen: The Love Boat

A San Francisco Airport:

"Where the hell is he?" Max asked himself as he looked down at his watch, "Why'd he take a different flight, anyway?"

"I dunno… Maybe he wasn't ready for the Mile High Club," Dako shrugged.

"How in the hell do you even know what that is?" Max demanded.

"Hey, Zeni-chan!" Fuji waved from across the airport. "How are you? How's my big brother treating you? Hi, Dako!"

"Lupin!" Max yelled at the top of his lungs, "You're under arrest!"

"I'm gonna go wait for a taxi… Come and find me after you get your butt kicked…" Dako lifted up hers and Max's rolling suitcase, and sported a carryon on either arm.

"Hey, Zenigata, do you like cartoons?" asked Fuji with her usual smug smile. As she spoke, her group gathered behind her, one by one.

"That mindless crap?" Max laughed, "I'd rather watch you all behind bars!"

"Ohhh… He must have the pre-wedding jitters," Fuji said to Ryo with a nod. "Okay, you guys remember the split-up technique?"

"Yep. Meet you in an hour, Fuji," Toshiro broke off in a run with Yukiko in one direction, Ally and Odori with baby Namiko went in another direction, Heiji and Ryo went off together, and Fuji ran in yet another direction. Max didn't care as much about the others; he wanted the big fish.

"Zenigata, you just got a Lupin out of prison—Why would you want to put one back in?" asked Fuji as she jumped upon the luggage pick-up and began to move.

"You get down from there right now!" Max tossed a set of handcuffs, and they wrapped about Fuji's wrists. She laughed and jumped off of the tram.

"You know, I would think you'd get over this trick by now and—Acck!" she let out a yell as a blue dye exploded from the handcuffs and all over her outfit and face. She looked up at Zenigata, slowly and seriously. Max took a step back; he usually wasn't intimidated by Fuji, but she usually didn't have a look to kill, either.

"Do you… Have any idea… How much this dress is _worth_? It's probably your entire paycheck for this month! Get over here!" she picked up the first heavy object she could find (a guitar case), and Max took a step back. She seriously looked like she wanted to do harm.

"I look like a SMURF!" Fuji yelled, and swung. Max ducked down, and attempted to retaliate, but had no time. He had no idea that one of Fuji's favorite sports growing up was softball, and she had an astounding batting average.

"C'mere!" Fuji yelled.

"I've got a gun!" Max stuttered.

"And I've got a size-four heel that I'm gonna kick your ass with!" Fuji replied as she began to chase Max full-on. This time, Zenigata took off running. Perhaps he wouldn't use those handcuffs again.

Max was more than relieved when he spotted Leo getting off of his flight, and ran to LeBlanc for protection. "Your sister's snapped?"

"What do you mean… Why does Fuji look like a Smurf?" asked Leo as he watched his sister continue her run.

"Don't talk—Hide!" Max said frantically.

"You ruined her favorite dress, didn't you?" Leo sighed. Two steps off of the plane and already trouble.

"Damnit, LeBlanc!" Max grabbed onto Leo, and the two took off running, Fuji in quick pursuit.

They finally lost her outside of the airport, and they found Dako, who was tapping her foot in impatience, "You two about done?"

"Yeah," Leo nodded. "Max, take some of your bags from Dako… That's considered child labor…"

"Not when the child's considered a demon…" Max grumbled as he hailed a cab. Leo placed the luggage in the back seat, and climbed into the back seat with Max and Dako.

"How long before the baby comes? Do you know if it'll be a boy?" Dako asked Leo intently.

Leo looked up at Max, and wondered if what he was doing was really fair to Zenigata, "I've still got to work out some of the kinks, plus I've got to talk with Max… He's going to be a dad, too, after all."

"You don't mind, though, do you?" Dako asked as she turned to Max, who was simply looking out the window and staring out at the city.

Later that Night:

"Here'll be your room," Natasha said as she led Max and Leo up into their guest room. Dako would sleep in Max's old room for the time being. Dako had made the comment when she got into the room about the numerous British romantic comedies Max owned, and Zenigata immediately pretended not to hear this comment. Dako searched through Max's room while Zenigata and LeBlanc unpacked in the guest room.

"I never asked you what you thought," Leo said as he unzipped his suitcase, "about the baby…"

"Well, we almost had to take the kid," Max said with a shrug. "Either that or you know Cecilia'll put it up for adoption. She didn't care if it got brain damage…"

"Yeah… But I don't want you to look at it as an obligation. I want you to be with me on this, Max," Leo said as he found an ironing board in the room and set it up. "I'll iron your shirts and pants if you want…"

"Thanks," Max mumbled as he removed them from his suitcase and laid them out on the bed next to Leo's shirts. "I still need to go out and buy something for…"

"Yeah, tell me about it… Two weeks, and we don't have crap done!" Leo sighed. "And to top it off, Fuji's in town and probably up to no good. At least my dad agreed to pay for the thing."

"Good, since you're the 'bride' you can plan it."

"I'm not playing a gender card with you, especially since we've both got the same decks…"

"Hm," Max walked over to their door, and opened it briefly. Dako was downstairs with his mother and father, and she was helping them cook dinner. They were just beginning, so the coast was clear…

He walked back to Leo, and placed his arms around LeBlanc's waist. Leo immediately gave him a look of surprise, and only began to speak when Max cut him off, "It's okay, Ari, I checked it out… They're all busy with dinner…."

"Maybe we should go help them, then," Leo sputtered as he broke away from Max. "Listen, I'm still getting used to… Everything…"

"It's okay," Max gave a sigh, and walked back over to his suitcase, and resumed unpacking. "I've tried to get in touch with our offices; still no word as to Lupin's ulterior motive for coming to San Fran."

Leo tilted his head to a side, and shook it slightly, "Listen, we'll rent a movie tonight and watch it together. Your parents want to take Dako out, anyway. She's never been to this part of the U.S. before, plus she's glad to be in a place where everyone speaks English!"

"All right," Max brightened up at this, and Leo knew that now he would be able to get everything he had wanted to out of the way.

A San Francisco Hotel Room:

"What's with the guitar case, Fuji?" asked Ally as he looked up from his sniper rifle, "And… What's with the new color?"

"It doesn't suit your eyes, you know," Ryo mumbled as she flipped through the channels of the television.

Fuji turned to Ryo and glared, "You know that you're the biggest couch potato I've ever known! I'm gonna go wash off… No one touch the guitar case."

Ryo and Ally waited until she was gone, and then both ran over to the guitar case, and Ryo watched as Ally opened it, and then slammed it shut after realizing what was in the case. Both looked at one another in disbelief, and then slowly backed into their places.

"I never knew Fuji was… Like that…" Ryo muttered to herself.

"Hey, what the hell's wrong with you two?" Yukiko asked as she walked into the living room of the hotel, a bottle of the best wine she could buy in one hand. Toshiro soon followed, carrying the glasses. It was a typical Friday night for the duo.

"Look in the guitar case," said Ryo.

"Okay… What, is it a bass signed by Paul McCartney?" asked Yukiko as she crouched down and opened the case.

"No, but it's something else guitar stars are familiar with," Ally answered as Yukiko started in awe at the bags upon bags of a familiar white substance.

"Oh my friggin' God!" Yukiko yelped.

"Wait, it could all be a dud," Toshiro sighed, and bent down to look in at the white bags. He lifted one up, and opened it, and stuck a finger into the bag. He put the finger to his tongue, and shot back after a delay in reaction. "Woahhh…. This stuff is not only legit, this is the best I've ever… What?" he asked as he looked around at his horrified coworkers.

"What? I grew up in _Brooklyn_. I worked on _Broadway…._" sighed Toshiro as he stood and wiped his hand clean on his pant leg.

"You did drugs!" Yukiko snapped and began to beat him over the shoulders with her fedora, "What the frig's you problem? Do you know what happens to those people? You wanna look like Keith Richards?"

"Ow! Yuki, ouch, stop!" Toshiro snapped, waving her away from him. He backed away from her and guarded himself with his arms.

"I can't believe you'd be that stupid!" Yukiko fumed, "How in the hell could you be such a moron, huh?"

"Hey, what's up?" Heiji asked as he and Odori walked in, Odori with Namiko in a stroller.

"Your brother's an idiot!" Yukiko growled.

"Well, that didn't take an expert," Heiji replied.

Fuji called out from the bathroom, "Heiji-chan, do you think you could lend me a hand here?"

"God, I already don't like the sound of this…" Heiji muttered as he set down Namiko's _Hello_ _Kitty _diaper bag and walked into the bathroom, where Fuji was seated on a small stool, rubbing her face clean. She had a bathrobe on, and Heiji saw her expensive dress and her denim jacket laying in a corner of the bathroom. They were a unique shade of cerulean.

"What in the he—Aiya!" Heiji jumped back in surprise as Fuji removed the towel from her face and revealed that it matched her outfit.

"I got it out of my hair, but my face is still giving me trouble… Do you know anything that'll get this stuff out?" she asked beggingly.

"Eh…. Um, we could always try alcohol…" Heiji replied with a shrug. "You don't have any open wounds on your face or anything, do you?"

"Just one in my heart from a guy in San Juan and two from shaving my legs," replied Fuji with her usual smile.

"Guy in San Juan?"

"Eh, long story," Fuji sighed. "Old partner of mine…"

"Before any of us?"

"Well, he worked with me and Ari."

"Ari and me."

"No, you weren't there yet," Fuji answered. "I was about eighteen at the time… He was Lithuanian, but had immigrated there to be a pirate."

"Like an eye-patch pirate?"

"Not quite," Fuji sighed, but this serene look was gone as Heiji applied the alcohol. "Yeouch! God that's freezing!"

"I warned you," Heiji sighed tiredly.

"Not about the ice water!" snapped Fuji.

"Whiner…"

San Francisco:

"Ehh…" Leo looked upward at the video store. He had been given his directions—No horror movies, and no more freakin' cartoons. English, Max wanted something in English.

He walked in, and began to look about the aisles. Leo figured his best bet would be to begin with new releases. He found a comedy that looked promising, and picked this one up, and he continued his search.

"I know he doesn't like cartoons, but who doesn't like _Shrek_?" Leo said to himself as he also picked up this movie. "Besides, it's CGI—It barely counts as the animation he's thinking of!" he chuckled to himself. He stopped at a booth of Japanese imports, and looked at the picture of the cheery monkey. Mankii-san, a new Japanese import, and someone who Leo knew quite well. He picked up the sample DVD, and looked down at it. "Who would've thought this would come back to haunt me? Eh, well, maybe include this—It'll be a good way to tell him… Let him know before Fuji spills the beans on it."

He turned his attention back to the aisles, and failed to notice a man walking in his direction. The two collided, and he man quickly apologized and hurried away from Leo, grabbing his DVD and running to the checkout. Leo shrugged this off, and picked up his movies, and walked to the checkout.

He returned later that evening, after a few more quick stops, while Zenigata and Natasha were out with their granddaughter. Max had already set up the den, complete with drinks and popcorn. "Hey, you were gone a while! What's up?"

"Nothing… I got some movies," Leo replied, holding one up, "Listen, I think there's something you should…"

"Great, go ahead and put it on!" said Max excitedly.

Leo held up the DVD with the smiling, dancing monkey, and then decided against it. No, this would be for later. He instead picked up another movie, and put this in the VCR. He then turned off the lights and seated himself next to Max.

"Hey, this looks interesting… Cheaply made, but interesting…." said Max as he watched the film begin. "I've never heard of this…"

"Funny; I thought I put in _Kill Bill_," Leo said to himself.

"Ah, well… Doesn't really matter… Ought to be interesting, whatever it is…" Max nodded.

It became apparent over time, though, that this wasn't a regular film. As it progressed, Max's jaw dropped, and Leo sat there, horrified, "T-That guy! He must've switched tapes with me! There was this creepy guy who was high-tailin' it outta there! What would I do with lesbian porn, anyway?"

"Not an idea…" Max said numbly, "I never want to see a version of _Lord of the Rings_ like that, again, though."

"Let's put something else on, then," Leo rose, sighed, and turned off the television. "Max, I've got something to show you…."

"More porn?" Max asked painfully.

"No… It's something else," Leo sighed as he turned off the VHS player and turned on the DVD player. "I went through a few jobs when I first left my parents… I got a few thousand yen when I first started off on my own by doing voiceovers… So, yeah… Um, someone found the tapes, and they finally animated series… I found a DVD…"

"Cool, put it on!" Max said quickly. Leo groaned, rolled his eyes, and put in the movie.

"Keep in mind I was desperate for cash at the time, okay?" Leo said as he sat down once again.

"Ohayo, Tomadachi-san!" a smiling, brightly colored monkey appeared on screen suddenly, and began to jabber off a mile-a-minute Japanese monologue to the screen.

Leo looked over to Max, and looked at Zenigata's twitching expression. The monkey gave a long laugh, and Max jumped at this chuckle. He recognized it, and Leo knew he did.

"You okay, Zenigata?" asked Leo as he continued to look at the brightly-colored screen.

"Considering the only other times you've laughed like that were when you were in drunk or you were in the sack, not really…" Max responded with a shudder.

"Yeah…. I know…" Leo cleared his throat, and rose, "I'm going to go get a drink…"

"No," Max smiled and pulled Leo back down, "C'mon, this is kinda cute!"

"This is like those indie films college students make…" Leo muttered as he put a hand on his head and covered his eyes. "Please don't make me watch this…" he moaned.

"Look at how cute! They're going to party! What'd you end up getting Neko-kun, Mankii-chan?" asked Max with a smile as he held his partner in place.

"I'll kick your ass if you don't let me off of here," said Leo with annoyance.

"Hey, there's a way off of here," Max said somewhat playfully to the struggling LeBlanc. Leo may have been taller and known more tricks on escaping, but Max had the better headlock.

"Okay, okay, what is it?" asked Leo in a pant after he finished his vain attempts at escaping.

"T'embrasse," Max said in his highly butchered French. Leo flushed, and sprung up out of the headlock.

"What if your parents come in?" Leo choked.

"It's not like we'll be making out or anything… God you're uptight, LeBlanc…"

"Only as uptight as you!"

"At least I know how to let my hair down every once in a while…"

"Thanks to you and the prison, I hardly have any hair to let down!" snapped Leo.

"You're still gorgeous to me, Mankii-chan," Max laughed, and leaned in to kiss Leo. Leo fell back on the couch and looked upward at Max, a little upset that Zenigata had won in the end.

"Hmm… I didn't hear a car in the driveway, so we're safe…" Max announced to Leo.

"As long as you don't turn this into a lemon, sure," Leo sighed._ 'I'm sure not everyone likes the kinda stuff Zenigata's thinking of… Who would've thought he'd be as big a perv as __Fuji__?' _he thought as Max leaned in and kissed him again.

About ten minutes later, the front door opened, but neither Leo nor Max heard. The annoying credits to the cartoon were over, and the two were much busier with other things during this period, anyway.

"Hey, do you hear that?" Natasha stopped her husband and granddaughter as they entered their home, "Sounds like someone yelled…"

Dako started uncomfortably, "Maybe they're…"

"Maybe someone broke in! Damn, I thought the spiked burglar bars would've worked for sure!" Zenigata said, breaking into his official police voice. He bent down into the umbrella stand, and pulled out a classic detective-issue revolver, "I'll be back… Natasha, you stay with Dako, in case there're more…"

"All right, Koichi," Natasha nodded, and took hold of one of Dako's hands.

"I don't think that there's a burglar," said Dako with a gulp.

"….Did someone just laugh?" Natasha inquired at the sound of a shrill dolphin-like laugh. Dako moaned, and put a hand on her forehead.

Zenigata slowly crept up the stairs, thinking back to his Interpol training. He carefully placed himself against the outside wall of the den, and grabbed onto the doorknob. He then threw the door wide open, and shouted.

"Interpol! Freeze!" Zenigata barked. His face quickly turned a shade of crimson, however, when he realized what he had walked in on, "Oh… Oh wow… Excuse me…" the old man sputtered as he slammed the door shut and put his back to it. He put hand over his eyes and muttered incoherent Japanese curses to himself.

"Koichi, is everything all right?" Natasha called up.

"Yeah, yeah, everything's great!" Zenigata replied, and waved down to him, "The boys just pulled out a game of Twister, and Max fell!"

"We don't own Twister," Natasha cocked her head to a side.

"Oh, everyone at ICPO loved Twister! They must've found one of the old games and brought it with them!" Zenigata hated lying, but he couldn't tell Natasha the truth without having a miniature stroke of some kind. His chest already was tightening from the stress of walking in and finding that.

"I _told _you that that was a lousy idea! Where in the hell is my tie?" a reddened-faced Leo asked as he finished putting on his socks.

"Here," Max sighed, and pulled it out from under the couch cushion. "Yeah, maybe it wasn't one of my better ideas…" Max added as he finished buttoning his shirt.

"You know, I can count the good ideas you've had in past four years on one hand," snapped Leo. "Now I can't find my glasses!"

"They're right over on the coffee table… Why you wear those all the time is a mystery to me, anyway; you don't need them… And I do have good ideas; a lot of them!"

"Oh?"

"Sure! Adopting Dako, agreeing to stay married to you, going to work for Interpol—"

"You were forced to work for Interpol… I tricked you into marrying me and I told you if you didn't help me with Dako I'd break all of your fingers."

"Whatever. Regardless of that, I stayed… What am I going to tell my dad?"

"That you're an idiot?"

"Oh, they already know I'm a screw up… That's nothing new… Amaya's married to an ex-thief, but I'm the one who got kicked out of school, so I'm the bigger loser."

"Heh, I guess that's why we get along so well—We're both the black sheep of our family…"

"I think we ought to go down there and apologize to my dad… Considering he's your father-in-law…"

"I think that's my dad's least favorite aspect of us," Leo sighed. "He loves you, but…"

"Listen, I can't help who my dad is anymore than I can help my hair color," Max said as he rose and draped his tie about his neck. "You ready?"

"Yup, c'mon," Leo rose, and walked out of the den and down the stairs, Max leading behind. Zenigata was out on the porch, smoking a cigarette. Natasha had told him to stop on numerous occasions, but he had compromised with her and only lit up during special occasions. This counted as one. If his hair hadn't already been gray, it probably would've made a sudden color change upon walking in on his son.

"Dad, can we come out?" Max asked weakly as he opened the porch door.

Zenigata nodded, and Max crept into the porch area, Leo trailing him behind into the Asian-inspired screened-in haven.

"Dad? Hey, um…" Max began before his mother walked out with their portable telephone.

"Max, honey, it's your boss," said Natasha.

"Oh… Sorry, I guess I have to take this…" Max took the phone from his mother and walked out, leaving Leo with not only Natasha, but Zenigata. Leo could feel the old man sizing him up visually, trying to make sense of him.

"….I'll go make some punch," Natasha said as she noticed Zenigata's one-man staring contest.

"Sounds good… Close the door…" Zenigata said in a mutter. Zenigata relaxed a little, and leaned back in his chair as Natasha slid the door shut, "Have a seat, Son…"

"Uh, yes, Sir," Leo seated himself uncomfortably in front of Zenigata, and waited pensively for him to continue.

"You know, I remember you from when you were in diapers… I was one of the first to hold you, aside from your old man, and now… Now you're a member of my family… Lupin the Fourth…. My son-in-law…."

"Um, I think I left my iron on… So if you…"

"Take a seat—I can wait a few more seconds," said Zenigata. "So, I hear you're painfully honest…. That true?"

"Um, I've been told…"

"So, what do you think of your dear old father-in-law, Zenigata?"

"You scare the living hell out of me, Sir," replied a very tense Leo. Zenigata gave way to a laugh, and slapped Leo on the back, _hard_. LeBlanc lurched forward, and joined in with a faint and mousy excuse for a chuckle. He was also going into the beginnings of an asthma attack during this.

"You know, I really don't know what do make of you, Kid!" Zenigata laughed. "How in the world did you come from your father, anyway? Eh, well, I guess if you get injected with enough penicillin from STD's, it's got to affect something…"

"Could I…?"

Zenigata placed an arm over Leo's shoulders, and the young man let out a small yelp. Zenigata continued his jovial mood, "You know, I chased your dad from one end of the earth to another and back again, and I never really did catch him… I hated your dad…. Part of me still does… And your mother, good gravy, what a bitch… But she was quite the little minx, too… You have her same colored eyes, you know… Those expressions are all your dad's, though. Max, well, let's face it, he's the male version of his mother, physically, and emotionally… Well, let's say that that apple had to hardly fall from the tree! Ha ha! He's just like me, well, except I never liked a Lupin like he does! But he sure is a real romantic like his dad, though…"

"Leo, we've got an assignment…" said Max, sticking his head out of the door.

"Thank G-I mean, someone!" Leo bolted up, and went to join Max. He couldn't escape Zenigata's smile, though, as he exited into the house.

"We've meeting him downtown. We're doing a drug smuggling operation," Max explained.

"….You're kidding…."

"Nope. Apparently it has some connection with your sister, though…"

"Really? How?"

"Guy named Jurgis Stanislovas ring a bell?"

"…Jurgis… Yeah…. What, he's involved?"

"Apparently. They think he's heading it," Max added.

Later, a Downtown Shipping Area:

"Partners?" Leo and Max shrieked in unison. The chief shuddered; both had very shrill voices when the put their minds to it.

"Chief, we do not need partners," Max said with a laugh.

"I realize that, but you two are going undercover on a couples' cruise…" said the chief.

"Um, well that's taken care of!" Max laughed, and nudged Leo. Leo blushed in response, and looked toward the ships.

"You two should've been fired for an office relationship… But since you're the only idiots willing to take the Lupin case, I have to keep you both on board… It's a couples' cruise, and you two will just draw attention if you're holding hands or things like that…. I don't want that from either of you…"

"Chief, I—"

"Lupin, you're already on thin ice with the government; don't test me. Your partners are from police stations in Germany and Brazil. Inspectors Gluckman and Tomas."

"Great, women…" Max grumbled and rolled his eyes.

"Max, I know your mother, and I know she's slap you on the back of the head for saying something like that… Your first assignment is to pick them up at the airport. Good luck, Gentlemen, and have a lovely wedding."

"Yes, Sir, we will," Leo nodded, and prepped himself for Max's obligatory outburst.

"That jackass! I ought to file a complaint for discrimination!" Max shouted while he stood there with clenched fists.

"Max, let's just get to the airport… They ought to be there already…" Leo sighed as he looked down at his watch.

"How can you be this passive?" Max shouted.

Leo sighed and walked toward his car, "C'mon, Zenigata, it'll be okay… We've got to do this, all right? It's our job, and we don't make all of the rules, you know…"

"This bites," Max said as he sat in the passenger seat of the car and pouted.

Later, the Airport:

Inspectors Nina Gluckman and Myra Tomas were about as professional-looking as Inspectors Leonard Arsène LeBlanc-Lupin (a temporary name until Leo could decide) and Maxwell Chaim Zenigata were unprofessional looking. Nina was a petite German woman with rounded features, a pair of large glasses, and near bluish hair which she kept in two buns, on either side of her head. Myra, on the other hand, was nearly Leo's height, and had stern sharp features, and dirty blonde hair which fell to about her mid-back.

"Inspectors Lupin and Zenigata, it's a pleasure," said Myra in her Brazilian accent.

"Just Leo, please," Leo replied. He did not stutter or redden, but Max could see he was avoiding direct eye contact with both female inspectors, as Nina was avoiding his and Leo's.

"Fine, then," Myra nodded. "This is my partner, Nina."

"Nice to meet you, Nina," Leo gave a smile and a nod, and Max simply rolled his eyes in response to this weak attempt at friendliness.

"Well, I suggest we be off, then," Myra sighed, picked up her luggage and followed Leo and Max out to a taxi. She tossed Max a small bag as he went to enter the cab.

"What's this?" asked Max.

"Wedding ring," replied Myra. "I was assigned you…"

"What! You're like a friggin' foot taller than me!" Max shrieked as he followed Myra into the cab. She took the front seat, while Max sat in the back, directly behind her.

"So I guess this means I'm your 'husband', Ms. Gluckman," said Leo with a smile.

"Uh-huh," Nina nodded, but once again did not meet Leo's eyes.

"We leave this evening for the cruise…" Myra continued. "I already have the rooms booked, so we're good to go on that. And Zenigata, I warn you now that I'm highly skilled in Brazilian martial arts."

"And I'm highly skilled in Israeli martial arts, plus I can cook!" snapped Max.

"Wow this is going to be a long week…" Leo said to himself tiredly.

A Dock in San Francisco:

"So, why are they going?" asked Ally as he looked over his shoulder at Yukiko and Toshiro, who were still loading their luggage onto a dolly.

"Because I need a realistic couple," replied Fuji.

"And why am I going?"

"Because I need a bodyguard," Fuji answered in a whisper. "Come on—They're letting us on now…"

"Who do you need a bodyguard from? And what about Ryoko, huh? Or Heiji? You like Heiji—I thought this would've been your golden opportunity! I mean, come on, a couples' cruise!"

"I do like Heiji, and there is an obvious reason why I couldn't have brought Ryo!" snapped Fuji.

"You know, I always thought you two were a better couple than her and Ari. I don't care if he was my best friend; you two got along better."

"Come on, Honey, they're boarding!" Fuji said in a false tone as she took Ally by the arm and led him up the dock and onto the large ship. Yukiko and Toshiro soon followed, but Fuji and Ally quickly lost them amongst the numerous crowds.

"None of these people look like druggies…" Ally mumbled.

"And I don't look like I like to play Scrabble, but I do…" Fuji answered as she retrieved their key and opened up the room. "Nice set up, huh?"

"Not too bad," Ally admitted as he laid down his suitcases and unlocked one, making sure his weaponry was still there. "So where do we begin?"

"How about why you haven't married that really great girl?" asked Fuji.

Ally gave a stunned look, "Where did that come from?"

"What are you scared, or can you just not meet up to the challenge?" Fuji asked with an imploring grin.

"Who told you what!" Ally demanded angrily.

"Just my Lupin sense kicking in," Fuji replied, knocking her own skull a few times. "So, tell me about it…"

"After you tell me about you and Jurgis," Ally answered.

"Hmm… Jurgis…What's there to tell? I was young and stupid, and he was a friend of my father's…. He worked with Ari and me a lot for a few years… He was like a brother to Ari, and to me…."

"What to you?" asked Ally.

"Nothing," Fuji shook her head, and let go of her distant look. "Nothing at all… Anyway, back to you, Mr. Cold Feet…"

"There's nothing to talk about," Ally answered, growing increasingly nervous. He finally broke down, and slammed down his suitcase. "I've never been with a girl, all right?" he yelled.

"Ally, not so loud," Fuji whispered. "Now what do you mean by that?"

"I get nervous—I've either ruined a relationship because of that or because of the fact that I'm a friggin' lunatic."

"You're not a lunatic!" Fuji patted him on the back, "You're only mildly deranged!"

"Gee, thanks," Ally grumbled.

"Listen, I know I usually charge a lot for this, but you're gonna get it for free," said Fuji with a wickedly smile.

"What are you talking about?" Ally asked, tilting his head to a side.

"The Fujiko Lupin, Jr. School for the Romantically Inept!" replied Fuji excitedly, "Graduating members include me and about twenty other guys…"

"Great…. I thought we were working on coke smugglers," Ally sighed with a roll of the eyes.

"I'm a good multi-tasker," replied Fuji.

Later that Night:

"If I see one more happy couple I swear I'm gonna puke…" Yukiko grumbled. "I hate all of this mush!"

"Please—You like that stuff, you just don't admit it! You're just like your dad—Right down to the romance novels," Toshiro answered, nudging her. The two were walking the length of the ship, in search of anything suspicious. "I'm kind of glad that we did this, anyway…"

"Why, so you can look at all of the taken girls and realized how much you lucked out?" asked Yukiko with a laugh.

"Yes, that and…Well… There's something else…" Toshiro sighed heavily and leaned on the rail of the ship. He looked down into the water, and took another deep breath. "I thought over some things, and I'm really sure about this…"

"Yeah? What's up?" Yukiko lifted her fedora from her eyes, and gave him her full attention.

"Well… If… Listen, there isn't an easy way to put this," Toshiro said to himself, and gripped onto the railing tighter. "I wanted to know if you ever considered getting married…"

Yukiko, who had been leaning on the railing, had to be saved by Toshiro before she fell completely off of the ship.

"Me? Um… Why do you ask?" Yukiko managed to choke out.

"Because of this," Toshiro tossed her a small box, and she opened it, and looked the ring over, and over, and over.

"You want me to…" Yukiko gulped and looked down at the shiny object.

"I know you have a hard time with commitment, but please just consider it," said Toshiro. "….We need to get back to work…."

"Yes," Yukiko said as Toshiro began to resume his beat.

"Hm?" Toshiro turned around, thinking that he had not heard this quite right.

"Yes… I'll do it," Yukiko nodded, and put on the ring, and then tossed the box overboard.

"Wow… I… That's terrific!" Toshiro laughed happily, embraced and lifted her up. "This is going to be great!"

"Heh… Me… Married…" Yukiko thought this over, and then passed out.

"Yuki? Yuki? You okay?" asked Toshiro.

Another part of the ship:

"Listen, you have crap timing at this… We're supposed to be working…" Leo protested. "What if the other inspectors come in?"

"Then the Amazon Princess and Princess Lea will just have to deal," Max kissed Leo, and threw him down onto the bed.

"At least get some ice, first," Leo sighed tiredly.

"What the hell for?" asked Max.

"Some people actually like ice in their drinks," replied Leo.

"You don't take your drinks with ice!" Max snapped.

"The other Inspectors… It's called courtesy—You should learn it," Leo responded. Max grumbled, rose and walked out of his cabin, which was adjoined to Leo and Nina's.

"Why care about those two, anyway?" Max said to himself as he trudged down to find an ice machine. Something struck him as curious, though; voices. He stopped, and listening. Two female voices, coming from around the corner.

"Listen, it's out of the way of those two clumsy morons," he heard one woman whisper.

"We should just tell them!" the other snapped in return.

"In all good time… Besides, it's none of their business, anyway!"

"Well, at least they'd understand… They're both guys, after all. And at least _they _had enough guts to adopt a kid. They're even married! When are you going to do that, huh, Myra! You know I want kids!"

"Nina, we can't in this work," sighed Myra.

Max put a hand to his mouth, and backed away from his hiding spot. He quickly ran back to Leo, who was somewhat confused as to why Max looked as spooked as he did.

"Max, what's up?" asked Leo.

"Those two inspectors, they're like us!" Max yelped in disbelief.

"Um… Yeah… We work for the same place…."

"They're both gay!" said Max.

"What! You're kidding! Heh, how about that?" Leo laughed. "How'd you get them to tell you?"

Max coughed and spoke sheepishly, "I… I didn't… I sorta spied…"

"Oh, Max," Leo groaned and placed a hand over his eyes. "You don't do that!"

"There's nothing wrong with spying."

"Yes there is," Leo replied.

"Inspector?" there was a knock on the door; Myra.

"Come in!" Max called.

"We didn't catch you two in the middle of anything, did we?" asked Myra as she and a perturbed looking Nina entered.

"Nothing more than the usual," Max replied and scratched the back of his head, and chuckled.

"Good; I just wanted to give you back your ice bucket. You dropped it while you were spying on me and my partner," said Myra.

"Eh… Thanks…" Max took the bucket, and set it aside, "I'm really sorry about…"

"Don't be; she should've told you, anyway," replied Myra. "I guess you realized the true nature of my and Nina's relationship."

"Yeah…. Well, more power to you," Leo gave a reassuring smile, and Nina immediately sat next down to Leo and took hold of one of his hands.

"Could you please tell me how you went about adopting your daughter?" asked Nina hopefully.

"Not this again!" Myra moaned.

"It's okay… We're getting another baby soon, anyway… I totally identify with you there," said Max.

"Myra, maybe one of us could carry a baby!" said Nina excitedly all while she continued to hold Leo's hand.

"And we've got money for that?" asked Myra.

"Well, maybe one of them could help us," said Nina, looking at Leo, and then Max.

"So, how long have you two been together?" Leo asked.

"Three years," Myra responded. "Nina really enjoys children… Comes from a large family… Personally, I don't understand why she's so desperate for one…"

"Well, Miss Nina, I can get you in touch with some people who help people like you adopt," said Leo. "They're helping me get custody of my kid, right now… They deal with custody matters in general."

"That'd be terrific!" said Nina.

"It's really important that you talk it over with your partner, though," Leo added. "It's a huge responsibility for both of you… Thankfully Max is extremely understanding and extremely giving…. And he also puts up with me…"

"You don't argue about that at all?" Myra asked Max.

"Heh, are you kidding? We argue about everything! It's a good week if he doesn't lock himself in the bathroom because I said something to him!"

"So you're the dominate one, huh?" Myra concluded.

"Well, most of the time," Max chuckled at this, and looked at Leo, who also found it mildly amusing. "And I take it you're…"

"Most of the time," Myra answered. "Well, I guess we could just stay next store. Our rooms are connected, anyway."

"That'd be terrific," Leo replied, and watched as Nina rose and broke hold his hand.

"Thank you very much, Leo," said Nina. "Hopefully we'll be able to talk more about this later…"

"After we're done talking about it," said Myra, taking Nina by the hand and walking into the adjoining room with her.

"You know, I know carnival people with lives more normal than mine," said Max with a sigh.

"That's cute; they want to adopt!" said Leo as he lied back on the bed. "I guess we should wish them good luck on that!"

"Yeah, yeah, touching… Now where were we?" asked Max with a smile.

"You are relentless, Zenigata," Leo laughed.

The Deck of the Ship:

"God it's gorgeous…" Fuji said as she looked out at the moonlit view over the ocean, "And the only single person here is me…. Oh, the irony…"

"Excuse me, Ma'am, where's your date?" asked a voice behind her.

"He's on the phone talking to his girlfriend," Fuji replied in a mumble. "How about you?"

"Well, I was hoping to find one…"

"Good luck, Buddy," Fuji snorted. "Hey, you got a cigarette?"

"Shows how much you remember an old friend…" said the man. Fuji turned her head, and gasped at the good-looking dark haired man, who looked older than her by at least six years.

"Jurgis?" Fuji yelped, and embraced him, "What are you doing here?"

"Working undercover; you?" asked Jurgis in a thick Lithuanian accent.

"Same! Oh my God, how're you been?" asked Fuji.

"Heh heh… Same old Fuji… I hear your brother left…" said Jurgis.

"Hm, yeah, Ari's doing his own thing right now, which includes Inspector Zenigata…." Fuji said with a roll of the eyes, "How's everything been for you, huh?"

"Good… Been doing a little here, a little there… You know how it is," replied Jurgis. "Come get a drink with me; he have lots to talk about…"

"You're damn right!" Fuji smiled widely, and walked with him off of the deck of the ship, and down into the bar.

A Small Hotel on Land:

"Sometimes I hate the computer work…" Heiji said, drumming his fingers and staring at the blank screen. "I mean, I love it and all, and I love the fact that I'm rarely taken hostage as a result, but it's just boring sometimes…."

"I can't believe she left me!" Ryo fumed.

"Ryoko, while you're pouting, could you make a bottle for Nami?" asked Odori hopefully as she sat in front of the television rocking the small baby.

"Fine… I'll be right back…" Ryo rolled her eyes, and walked into the kitchen. She went to work making a bottle, and while in the middle of this, a phone call came for her.

"Hello?" Ryo asked as she picked up the phone. She was also pouring milk into the bottle while she spoke to her unknown caller.

"Has the whore left yet?" asked Victor frantically.

"If you mean Fuji, then yes… How're you doing, by the way, Victor?" asked Ryo blandly.

"She's in trouble…" said Victor.

"And why are you telling me this?"

"Because even though I revile her, I know she's your friend…"

"God, you really are desperate to get into my pants, aren't you?"

"There's someone there who's bent on killing her, Ryoko!" Victor shouted.

Ryo held the phone away from her ear and sighed, "Is yelling just a Lupin thing? Does everyone in your family do that?"

"Jurgis, a drug dealer named Jurgis," said Victor. "I'm not lying about this…"

"Good-bye, Victor, and goodnight… Sleep tight," Ryo hung up the phone, and walked into the living room with a bottle.

"Who was that?" asked Heiji as Ryo entered the living area.

"Victor," Ryo sighed, "talking about how some guy named Jurgis wants to kill Fuji… Freak…"

"Jurgis?" Heiji paled, and wheeled back in his chair, "Ryo, I hate to break it to you, but Fuji told me about a guy named Jurgis… I think Victor was telling the truth…."

There was a long pause from the three, and then seemingly at once they all lunged for a phone, and tried desperately to get a hold of Victor.

"Damn, get his number!" Ryo demanded.


	17. Cocaine

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Lupin III, but I own a shiny penny… look at it shine!

Hey there!

I've got a new story… Kinda! If you haven't viewed the Lupin section of recently, here's an announcement: It's called _Scrapbook Memories_. What is it? Basically a bunch 'o stories that I couldn't fit anywhere the first four times around. Think of them as those delicious leftovers you find the day after you order a bunch of pizza—Those kind of leftovers! And, yes, I am taking requests… Any ideas you'd like to see? Kind of curious about something in a character's past? It doesn't have to be just the Lupin the Fourth gang—Lupin the Third gang counts here, too, and I've got stories for them lined up. I can't promise it will be updated as often, but I'm not going to let it sit stagnant, either!

Fun Fact of Boredom: Jurgis' name comes from the main character in Upton Sinclair's _The Jungle_, which is a book about meat processing plants. Please don't read this book if you enjoy hamburgers, or food in general…

Chapter Seventeen: Cocaine

On the Cruise Ship:

Leo shook Max awake, and Zenigata turned, and opened a single eye at LeBlanc, "….What?"

"I got a phone call from Dako," Leo whispered quietly.

"And? What'd she do, try to set the house on fire again?" asked Max with a yawn as he sat up in bed.

"The lawyer called my dad, because he couldn't get a hold of me," Leo continued.

"And?"

"We're getting the baby," Leo replied with a happy laugh. He leaned down, and kissed the stunned Max on the cheek. "It's a little boy…."

Max blinked a few times numbly; what in the hell was he going to do with a little kid? He'd never been around them before; he had enough of a time with Dako, and she was eleven. So now he was going to be in charge of a preteen and an infant.

Money wasn't the issue with Max; Leo had amassed a great amount in his savings accounts. Time was the main factor—They already spent a lot of their time hunting down Lupin, and when they weren't doing that, now, they'd be taking care of two children. What time did that leave for them, exactly? Things were stretched as they were with Dako, and now with another huge responsibility… Max began to go into an anxiety attack.

"Max, are… Are you all right?" asked Leo worriedly.

"Yeah," Max said with a heavy breath. "L-Leo, this is nice and all, but how are we going to have another kid, huh?"

"Well," Leo began uncomfortably, "I thought… Well, maybe we could move in… With my parents? Now, Max, don't look at me like that—I already talked to Mom, and she'd be thrilled to help us take care of the baby. She's already having a blast with Dako! So's Dad! And your parents love her, too!"

"Leo, that's not the point… You don't have kids so someone else can raise them…"

"Well it's the best situation I can think of right now," Leo said in a slight snap. "I never planned for any of this, either, you know."

Max sighed, and sat up in bed, "We'll think of something… Right? We'll think of something better…"

"Yeah… We just need to get some sleep right now," Leo yawned, and lied back down. There was a long pause, and Leo spoke again. Max shuddered; he just wanted some damn sleep. "Do… Do you think it'd be okay if we named him Arsène? I mean, it's a name that's been in my family for generations…"

"Fine," Max yawned, and rolled over in bed, "Does that mean you're going to change your name back to Ari?"

"I don't know yet; I'll decide something by the time we get married," replied Leo. "What do you think?"

"Well, who do you feel more like?"

"I don't know… I used to think that Ari and Leo were separate, but they've kinda merged over the years…"

"Don't worry your pretty little head off about it anymore. We'll talk about it more later. For now, let's just try to sleep…"

Another part of the Ship:

Yukiko hung up the phone, and looked back at Toshiro, "I had to let my dad go… He got so happy when I told him I was getting married, I think he started crying, but didn't want to lose his macho image… Well, at least he'll be on Ryoko's ass, now. It's outta my hands."

"You…. You aren't going to pass out at the altar, are you?"

"Why in the hell do you ask that!"

"Just checking," Toshiro replied quickly. "God the guest list's going to be huge…." he said to himself tiredly.

"It doesn't have to be that big; my mom and dad's wedding was shotgun… Hell, someone even pulled out a weapon!" she chuckled, and placed her fedora over her eyes in classic Jigen fashion. She looked up at Toshiro, and noted the strange expression on his face, "What's up?"

"That guy who killed Julia's still out there…" Toshiro said in a mutter.

"Yeah, but your mom ex-communicated him, remember? He ain't even a rat anymore! He's lower!" replied Yukiko.

"Yeah, which would give him a reason to hate me more…" Toshiro turned to Yukiko seriously. "Promise me you'll be careful…"

"What? Hey, this is me!"

"Yukiko…"

"Fine, fine, I promise… Now let's get some rest!" she yawned, and turned on the television. Toshiro complied, and switched off the light, but was kept awake by his thoughts. What if the man who killed Julia ended up going after Yukiko, out of spite?

Meanwhile, on a completely different area of the ship, deep down below, Fuji and Jurgis were catching up in the form of playing darts.

"So, what have you been up to? Other than the usual, that is?" asked Jurgis as he tossed a dart to the board.

"Eh, nothing, really. Spent a year in a nunnery."

"…Why?"

Fuji shrugged, "Looked like a good hiding place…"

"For you, definitely. Who would think of finding you in a place without cigarettes, boys or booze?" said Jurgis with a laugh as he tossed another dart. Fuji threw a dart, and this landed atop Jurgis', causing it to split in several directions. "So, are you seeing anyone?"

"Sort of…"

"That guy on the boat with you, are you involved with him?"

"Hell, no!" Fuji laughed, "He's got a girl…"

"So, what about the 'sort of'? Who's 'sort of'?" asked Jurgis.

"…His name's Heiji, and he's harder to get into than Buckingham Palace…"

"But that was a piece of cake for you!"

"Yeah, but it still took a lot of skill and strategy…"

"So, what's Heiji like?"

"Uber intelligent, real geeky guy… Super hot," replied Fuji. "Hell, he puts up with me… You remember Goemon? Well, he looks like Goemon, only shorter and with a rounder face. He used to be a little bit on the pudgy side, but Hawaii's done good for that boy!"

"Hmm… Sounds like you might have found your Fujiko, Lupin," said Jurgis with a laugh. "I still remember when you had that crush on me!"

"Hey, I was sixteen, you were twenty two… You'd been all over the place, smoked, had a motorcycle… You were like two steps away from friggin' God!" said Fuji with a laugh.

Jurgis turned his head to a side, and smiled, "How serious are you with Harry, or whatever his name is?"

"Heiji," Fuji corrected, and became stern. "Jurgis… I don't know what you're saying, but you know it's not possible. You've always been like a big brother to me, and that's it. And trust me, big brother figures are a rare thing for me to find nowadays."

"It's just amazing how much you've grown, Fuji," said Jurgis with a shake of the head. "You were still losing your weight when we met …"

Fuji smirked, and gave a small chuckle, "Yeah… I wasn't really crazy about my chunky stage… I'm just glad it's over…"

"You wore it well," replied Jurgis, setting aside his darts. He sat down beside Fuji, and looked her dead in the eye, "So, I take it you're here for the coke, neh? And I don't mean the cola, so save me the smart ass retort… Are you planning to sell it?"

"Hell, no!" Fuji snapped, "I'm a lot of things, including a nympho, but I'm no narco!"

"All right, all right... Simply asking," Jurgis held up his hands in defense. "Perhaps you should be getting back to your room; your roommate may wonder where you ran off to…"

"Good idea," Fuji nodded, turned and walked toward the front entrance. But before exiting the sublevel rec room, she turned back to Jurgis. "Jurgis… You… You don't have anything to do with those drugs, either, do you?"

"Of course not!" Jurgis laughed, "Good night, Fujiko."

"Good night, Jurgis," Fuji smiled, and turned away from him, and walked back up into her room, where Ally was lying on the bed, his black Bruce Lee-like shirt unbuttoned, revealing a white shirt underneath. He looked up at Fuji, curious at her enigmatic expression.

"Where've you been?"

"Catching up with an old friend," replied Fuji, sitting down and looking at the television, where an old episode of _The Green Hornet _was currently residing. "You and martial arts films… You're about as bad as Ryo-san with her Westerns or Yuki-san with mob films…"

"Why do you put a honorary in behind everybody's name, huh? I mean, you know us pretty well…"

"I know, but I still have the feeling that I'm still unfamiliar with you guys," Fuji yawned, and lied down on the bed. "God, I'm beat! It's hard being so damn good sometimes…"

"Heh, I'm so sure…" Ally sighed as he rose from the bed and walked over to the couch, carrying a pillow. Fuji looked up at him, and gave a Cheshire Cat grin.

"Ally-chan, with all due respect, you aren't my time. Come back on over—I'll behave. My dad was a gentleman, and I'm a lady," Fuji said to him, patting the bed.

Ally looked down at the couch, and then back over at Fuji.

Fuji sat up, and walked over to the couch, "Let me take the couch at least. I don't mind it, honestly. I used to fall asleep in trees on our home in France all of the time—That's one thing about me, I can sleep anywhere…. No dirty joke intended."

"Fuji, are you sure?" asked Ally, uncertain.

"Uh-huh," Fuji took the pillow from his hands and laid it on the couch. "Now you get to bed—I've got some work to do here."

"All right," Ally set his long-sleeved black shirt on a desk chair, and also removed his shoes and socks. By the time he turned around, Fuji was back from the bathroom, in a pink nightgown. She gave Ally a small smile before taking an extra blanket and taking to the couch for the night.

Ally switched off the lights, and then also went to bed. This didn't last long, however. There was an air vent over the bed, and it was slowly unscrewed as the two slept on, and a poisonous snake was dropped into the bed. It slithered beneath the covers, and Ally's eyes shot open as he registered something crawling over his chest.

"Fuji… Fuji!" Ally hissed until Fuji opened her eyes slowly and looked up at him, dumbly tired.

"What's wrong?" Fuji yawned.

"Come look under the sheets," Ally whispered.

Fuji sat up in the bed and jerked her head back in shock, "Nah-ah, I know that game."

"No, really!" Ally tossed the covers back a little, and Fuji let out a gasp of horror as she watched the adder glide over Jigen once more.

"Okay… Um… I'm gonna go get Yukiko or Toshiro… They'll know what to do," said Fuji as she rose from the couch and took cover behind it.

"Damn it, no, I need you hear now!" Ally snapped.

"But… Um…. Snakes kind of freak me out…" Fuji admitted with a nervous chuckle.

"Do something before it bites me!" Ally said in a near shout which died when he heard a hiss from the snake.

"Um… Okay… Snakes… What do snakes hate…" Fuji paced back and forth. "Oh, I've got it—I'll shoot it!"

"WHAT?" Ally shrieked. "You'll friggin' shoot me!"

"But you won't be poisoned," Fuji shrugged, and Ally muttered something angrily under his breath in response. "Okay… I've got an idea… I'll try to distract it with something bright!"

"Snakes are friggin' blind, dumbass!"

"No crap, really? Well, I guess you learn something new everyday…"

"Hurry… It's down by my feet!" Ally said. Fuji nodded, and quickly retrieved a coat hanger from the closet, untwisted the wire, and threw back the sheet with it. There was the snake, staring back at her. She gave another yell, and fell back on top of a coffee table, breaking it in the process.

"Owww… I think I broke my coccyx…" she moaned.

"Good for you—Now get this offa me!" Ally snapped.

Fuji nodded, and rose. By this time, the snake had reared its head up, and was flicking its tongue out, taking in its environment. Fuji, out of desperation, grabbed her pillow from the couch, and grabbed her Watlher. She shot, and the pillow stopped some of the sound, but it gave enough of a sound for Yukiko and Toshiro to hear. They had already been awoken by the breaking of the table, however.

The snake went flying as the bullet made impact with its skull, and Ally quickly jumped off of the bed and took a place next to Fuji.

Around this time, Yukiko had finished picking the lock to Fuji and Ally's room, and she and Toshiro ran in, their weapons drawn.

"What the hell's going on here?" Yukiko demanded as she looked at the scene.

"I wish I knew," Ally admitted. "Fuji just saved my life!"

"How in the hell did she manage that on her own?" asked Yukiko.

"I'm self-sufficient!" Fuji snapped in anger.

"What's this snake doing here?" asked Toshiro as he walked over to the dead reptile and poked it with his sword. The corpse of the snake lunged and bit into the metal, and Toshiro raised his sword, and was able to get a good look of the animal. "This wasn't an accident… This snake's from the Caribbean area…"

"How do you know something like that?" asked Yukiko as she put away her gun.

"Well, I'd order birds sometime from that area, and they'd always have to check for these snakes, in case they packed themselves away in the crates….These are super-poisonous. Whoever slipped this in here really wanted one of you dead."

"The Caribbean…. That includes Puerto Rico, doesn't it?" Fuji asked.

"Um… Last time I checked," replied Toshiro as he fetched Ally a glass of water from the bathroom and brought it back to the still-shaken Jigen.

"Heh… Hey, let's try to get to sleep now," Fuji stretched and yawned.

"You want me to stay in here with you guys? I don't mind reptiles that much… I've worked with dozens," said Yukiko.

"Nah, we'll be okay! Thanks, though!" Fuji grabbed the pillow with the bullet hole, and used this to support her head as she lied down on the bed. "Good night, Ally-chan."

"Yeah… g'night…" Ally muttered.

The next morning:

"Breakfast with the captain…. Wow, I wonder what we did!" said Leo as he looked up at the invitation once more. He was adjusting his tie in the mirror, and Max rolled his eyes, and walked over to Leo, pulling off the tie and setting it aside.

"We're trying to fit in… Try to look a little less formal," said Max, who had opted for a navy blue sports jacket and slacks and a light blue shirt.

"Let me try to go find my Hawaiian print button-up and panama shoes, then," said Leo with a smirk and a chuckle. He walked over to his suitcase and pulled out a light purple shirt, and began to exchange this for the black shirt and purple jacket he usually wore.

"You know, even I fell for the stereotype of gay guys having great fashion sense—You've proven me wrong, Leo," sighed Max as he watched Leo add onto this outfit with a pair of khakis.

"Yeah, you talk… You're the one who wears tweed."

"My dad let me borrow the suit, and then I decided the color looked nice on me!"

"That shade of brown would do injustice to anyone," replied Leo.

"Excuse me, could we come in?" Nina's voice could be heard from the other side.

"Come on in!" Max called, and Nina opened the door and smiled. She was wearing a yellow sleeveless sundress and matching shoes and a purse. Myra was behind her in a mint green pantsuit, and her usual sharp expression. Max and Leo walked out, and Max's gaze immediately fell to Myra's feet.

"Do… Do you always have to wear heels?" asked Max as he looked down at her extremely sharp heels. "I mean, you're already taller than me, so…"

"I think we have more to worry about than height, Max," said Myra with her usual small snap. "We were invited by none other than Jurgis Stanislovas… The same man we're suspecting to be involved in all of that drug trafficking going on…"

"I can't believe Fuji would get in the middle of something like this… Drugs! I mean, I know she's always been sparse on standards, but even she's got them!" said Leo to himself.

"It must be really hard chasing after someone you love," said Nina in her usual quiet tone.

"Heh, you have no idea…." said Leo with a laugh.

"I was a bounty hunter before I joined Interpol; I had to track down my brother," said Nina.

"Oh… So you do… I'm really sorry to hear about that, Nina…"

"It's all right… Hans is getting help right now, and that's all that matters…" said Nina quietly.

"Well, shall we be off?" Myra asked, clutching onto her purse.

"Of course," Leo nodded, and they all walked toward the captain's quarters of the ship, where they were more than surprised to see Fuji already there.

"Lupin!" Max shouted, but was held back by a frightened Leo.

"Max, we're undercover; don't blow this! Trust me, you may know martial arts, but this guy could still break you like a friggin' twig!" snapped Leo.

"Lupin," Max forced a smile, and reached out and took Fuji's hand, kissing it and giving another polite smile. "I've heard all about you in the papers…"

"I invited two sets of newlyweds to join us, if you don't find, Fuji," explained Jurgis.

"Newlyweds?... Oh, newlyweds, yeah!" Fuji raised her orange juice glass and smiled, "Congratulations to you all…"

"Thank you very much," Leo smiled, and seated himself next to Nina. Myra sat next to Max, and Fuji and Jurgis sat at opposite sides of the table. Leo quickly held his menu up and prayed that Jurgis wouldn't recognize him, although most of the free world knew who he was by now.

"I heard they found your brother," said Jurgis to Fuji as she sipped her tea. "I was in Brazil at the time, so I didn't hear the details… What happened?"

Fuji ran a finger across her neck, "They friggin' fried him. Poor Ari…"

"That's a shame," Jurgis sighed, and shook his head. "Well, you were always the better thief, anyway… You were better at a lot of things when compared to him… No offense, and God rest his soul, but he was one of the whiniest bitches I'd ever met!"

Max choked on his tea in an attempt to hold back laughter, and Leo tried to look as unphased as possible at these comments.

"So, what are your all's names? I don't think I caught them…" said Fuji to the four 'strangers'.

"Well, I'm Peter Goldstein, and this is my wife Cindy," replied Max.

"And I'm Greg LeRoy, and this is my wife Jan," said Leo, taking hold of Nina's hand.

"Well, Peter and Greg… Cindy and Jan, it's a pleasure to meet you," said Fuji as she poured herself some more orange juice.

_'The friggin'_ Brady Bunch_? They could've at least picked a show I liked…' _Fuji thought as she sipped her orange juice. "Jurgis, I don't mean to alarm any of our guests, but last night something weird happened… I had a friggin' snake nearly kill my date…"

"Is he okay?" asked Max worriedly with the mindset that her date was Heiji.

"Ally's fine," replied Fuji.

"Ally?" Leo and Max asked in unison. Jurgis gave a look of interest in the inspectors' direction, and Leo quickly turned and smiled.

"It's what Peter and Cindy want to name the baby they've got on the way…" Leo explained.

"Baby?" Myra frowned and paled, and then gave way to a bit of nervous laughter, "Greg… How could you? That's a surprise! Ha ha! Sorry you had to find out this way, Peter!"

"It's all right… I'm used to surprises," Peter said with a longgg sip of his coffee.

"Bacon?" Jurgis offered.

"Yes, please," said Myra quickly.

Jurgis gave another look of confusion, "Aren't you Jewish, though?"

"Hm? Ohhh… Oh, Goldstein—My wife's a Protestant. I married outside," Max whispered. "You know, just between us, my mother still says she's a pagan!"

There was a definitely fake laugh shared by the five at the table, and Myra delivered a very quick kick to Max's right shin. Max gave a yelp, but hid this with a cough.

"That's all quite interesting…" said Jurgis, biting into an apple and setting it back down. Leo was right, Max thought with a twitch of the mouth; Jurgis looked like he could bench press the ship. His eyes shifted toward Fuji, who he knew was thinking something, although he couldn't quite determine what.

Another part of the ship:

It was quite dark in the innermost workings of the ship. Not the same polished white and sand colored decks and rooms which overwhelmed the top part of the ship. It was in these dark innards that Ally, Yukiko and Toshiro found themselves winding through seemingly endless passageways.

"That stool pigeon told me that it's behind this door," Yukiko whispered, stopping in front of a large thick iron door.

"Well, I'll take care of this," Toshiro went to grab his swords, but Yukiko quickly stopped him.

"We need to make it look like we weren't here," she whispered, motioning for Toshiro to put away his swords. "Look, there's an air vent up there—We could get someone to slide up into it."

"But you hate heights, Yuki, and Toshiro's the friggin' jolly red giant," Ally protested. "Who are we… Oh no…"

"Why do you think you came in the first place, Mr. Acrobat?" asked Yukiko. With her signal, Ally was raised up onto Toshiro's shoulders, and after undoing the vent, he wormed his way into the small crawl space, and was soon on the other side, but still reachable by radio transmission. Yukiko and Toshiro wore earpieces and listened to Ally's shocked response.

"It's a really white Christmas in here…." said a stunned Ally, "You should see all of this stuff! There's got to be millions on here! It's all in instrument cases! They've been transporting it that way!"

"Well, take some photos, and climb back through," Yukiko replied.

"Okay," Ally remained silent after this, and Toshiro and Yukiko did not hear more from him until he slid out of the air vent, landing on his hands and tumbling onto the ground, and ending up on his feet.

What the three didn't know, however, was that their frequency had been caught on the radio of the ship's pilot, and Jurgis had been informed.

"What do you want me to do?" asked the pilot to Jurgis as he stood next to the bulky Lithuanian.

"Let them go, for now," Jurgis whispered, and then turned back to his puzzled guests. He raised his tea cup, and smiled, "A toast to good friends… Those which we already have and those which we've yet to meet."

"Here, here," the others muttered.

After a very tense breakfast, Jurgis excused himself and left the five together at the table.

"I've got a set of handcuffs with your name on them, Lupin," said Max in a low growl of a whisper.

"Blondie, I'd watch what you say… This room is bugged," said Fuji through her teeth as she faked another smile.

"What?" Myra and Nina gasped.

"So…. Tell me, Miss LeRoy, however do you get your hair that shade?" asked Fuji, leaning with her elbows on the table.

"Um… Well…" Nina began.

"Why don't you come back to my room and show me?" asked Fuji with a smirk, winking at her.

"Oh… Hrm, we wanted some fresh air, anyway… Let's just go up on board for a cigarette," Max rose, and all five walked out onto the deck of the ship.

"This whole ship's bugged," Fuji said to the four inspectors as they all looked out at the azul ocean. "There's an entire room stuffed with drugs… I just had one of my guys there…"

"If that's true, and there are bugs everywhere, why are you telling us?" asked Myra suspiciously.

"Because they already know we're here," Fuji responded, and looked at Myra with amusement. "You trust me even less than Zenigata!"

"Wait, Fuji, how does he know?" asked Leo, taking hold of one of her arms, "Did you tell him—"

"I'm as surprised as you are. I had no clue you were here!" Fuji admitted with a shrug. "Ally, Toshiro and Yukiko are also here. I think we _really _need to find them now."

"You guys find them," Leo instructed Max, Myra and Nina. "Max, don't go making any arrests yet; we need their help, as sad as it sounds… I need to talk with Fuji, alone, for a bit."

"Sibling stuff, eh?" Max sighed, and put his hands in his pockets. He walked back into passenger quarters with the two female inspectors, and they went in search of Fuji's accomplices.

"Fuji, Jurgis is behind all of this," Leo said quietly.

"I heard you got the baby," Fuji said, her voice dropping its usual gaiety for a few moments.

"Fuji, look at me," Leo took her by the chin and looked her in the eyes. "I know how much you looked up to him, but he's working for a side that both you and I despise…"

"I know…" Fuji stepped away from Leo, and looked out at the ocean again. "I… I know… I didn't want to admit it… He tried to kill me last night…"

"What?" Leo gasped.

"Yeah…" Fuji nodded, and rubbed her eyes, "We've got to stop this man, Inspector. What he's doing could harm thousands, if not millions. I'll cooperate with the government only because I want him behind bars…."

"All right, Lupin. Tell me your game plan. I know you've got one," said Leo with a clever smile.

Off Shore:

"Are you sure Namiko will be all right?" Odori shouted over the noise of the cigarette boat's engine.

"My grandpa's great with kids!" Heiji shouted in response. Ryo hit a rough wave and the two jerked forward. "Hey, watch out!"

"Yeah, yeah…" Ryo replied under her breath, "If you don't like my driving then you're free to come on up, Heiji," Ryo muttered.

"Is that the ship there?" asked Odori, shielding her eyes from the sun with her right hand while she held Zantetsuken in the left.

"Yep! The Royal Cubana!" Ryo called, "Odori, you ready?"

"You bet," Odori was strapped by the waist to a seat of the boat, and stood upon the front of the cigarette boat. She threw up her sword, and it lodged in. It had had a ladder attached to it, so the three scaled up quickly, and soon tried their best to remain unnoticed while looking about for Fuji or any other friendly face.

They finally found Yukiko and Toshiro, who were outside of their room. Toshiro had brought them doughnuts, and Yukiko had her mouth stuffed with a pastry when Ryo walked up and embraced her. "Thank God you're okay, and—What's this ring?" she gasped as she took Yukiko's hand, "Oh my God, look at this rock! Who in the hell gave you this? Did you steal it!"

"I bought it," Toshiro replied, not liking the fact that Ryo had stomped on his foot with her heel as she ran to her sister.

"Ryo, would you mind getting off my foot?" asked an annoyed Toshiro.

"Oh, whoops, sorry, Big Guy," Ryo patted him on the shoulder and promptly stepped off of his foot.

"Yukiko! Toshiro!" the two turned about at the sound of their names, and saw Max, Myra and Nina running towards them.

"Crap—Run!" Yukiko shouted.

"No, stop!" Max called, "This is about Lupin!"

"Where's Fuji?" asked Odori, drawing her blade and holding it up to Max's face.

"She's with Leo—Where's the one with the pointy nose?" replied Max.

"He's right here!" Max turned about, just in time to meet with Ally's foot. Zenigata stumbled back, and wiped the blood from his nose, and glared at Jigen. He returned the kick with a punch, and the two began to go at it until Odori released her blade and caused a light in between the two to fall at their feet and break. This snapped them out of their fight, and they both looked at Odori, both still full of rage toward one another.

"What's this friggin' about?" snapped Ally.

"Let us explain," said Myra.

"Who in the hell are you!" Yukiko asked.

"Inspectors Gluckman and Tomas," replied Nina, flashing her badge and giving Yukiko a small smile. Myra noticed this, and gave Yukiko an icy glare while she continued.

"Your friend's in great danger… The man who she's spending so much time with is a drug trafficker Inspector Gluckman and I have been hunting down for years," replied Myra sternly.

"That would explain the cocaine," said Toshiro with a nod.

"We're asking for your cooperation," said Myra.

"Or what?" asked Ryo.

"Or we pack all of your asses into a police wagon!" Max yelled.

"You get out of my face, Zenigata—Now," said Ryo, staring down Max with a fire which she had rarely shown.

"The claws are coming out… You might want to take a step back," said Toshiro in a whisper, taking Yukiko by the shoulder and pulling her back with him. Heiji, Ally and Odori soon followed this example, as did Myra and Nina.

"You're a criminal—I don't have to if I don't want to!" Max replied, taking out his handcuffs and waving them under her nose.

"…He's been putting you under a lot of stress, hasn't he, Blondie?" asked Ryo, putting her hands on her hips.

"An immense amount! More so than usual!" replied Max, still in his Zenigata-like shout.

Ryo gave her usual calm smile, and took the handcuffs from Max's hand, and spun them around on her index finger a few times before taking hold of them in her hand, "Well he's in danger right now, and so's my best friend. Let's go get them, what do you say?"

"Sure…" Max snatched the handcuffs away and began to storm down the hall, the Lupin gang following behind. Myra fell back, next to Yukiko, who was leading the tail of the group.

"You touch her and I'll break your damn fingers," Myra whispered to Yukiko, who looked up at her, stunned.

"Wha… What are you talking about?" asked Yukiko, nearly choking on the gum she had been chewing for the past hour.

"You know who," Myra said in a snap, and walked back up to the front with Nina. Yukiko blinked a few times, and walked closer to Toshiro for protection.

The deck had mysteriously cleared itself by the time the Lupin gang and inspectors arrived. It was also probably appropriate that there was a storm brewing on the horizon. About the only ones on deck were Fuji and Leo, who were standing towards the front.

"Inspectors, while you were gone, my brother and I took care of the drug problem," said Fuji with a smile and a salute.

"How in the hell did you manage that, hm?" Max asked both Fuji and Leo accusingly, placing his hands on his hips.

"Bravo… Seems like you all figured it out," they turned their attention to the front of the ship's cabin doors, and saw Jurgis leaning against them, clapping his hands and chuckling. He stopped, and folded his arms, and a look of deep thought came upon the man's face, "I'm quite sad that you weren't here for the prize, Fuji—We could've split it. You've gone soft… I hear you cut your hair for a wig for a cancer patient… You also helped get your brother off of the hook… Out of all of the Lupins, you're probably the most saintly… But also the dumbest… That's all right; it's not your fault you're a woman…."

"Why that—" Yukiko began, but Fuji shook her head, and held Yukiko back. Fuji leaned in to Leo and whispered.

"I need you to get the passengers off of the ship… And I need Heiji, Odori and Ally to get the drugs into the life rafts I've set up down there… Just trust me…"

"What about you, huh!" Leo hissed in a whisper.

"I'll be fine," Fuji smirked, removed her jacket, and tossed it to Leo. She took a few steps forward, and stood akimbo to him while the others followed her orders. Jurgis' lackeys went to stop them, but Jurgis only laughed.

"No, let them pass… Whatever silly scheme they have concocted won't work, anyway… I've planted bombs in every room in this damn ship—Half an hour, and no way will everybody be off! Let them go for it!" he laughed, and allowed the angered Lupin gang and inspectors to pass him.

"Now, Fujiko, where were we?" he turned back to Fuji and smiled.

"I think I was about ready to kick your ass, Jurgis," said Fuji with her usual Lupin charm. "You know, I hate violence, but when it comes to a big gorilla like you, there's only one way to teach you—And that's with a high heel up your rear."

"You talk big… You make your ancestors proud…" said Jurgis with a hearty laugh.

"Yeah, and you've got a big ship… Tell me, is that an extension or something, eh?" asked Fuji. Jurgis glowered, and lunged for her. She quickly ducked out of the way, and was behind him. He was big, strong and could probably pound her face in, but she had one thing that he didn't—Agility.

"Only rodents and cowards run!" Jurgis growled, turning about and grabbing for her again.

Fuji ducked once again, and rolled down beneath a table. Jurgis quickly knocked this out of the way, and looked down at Fuji, who now wore a breathing mask and held a smoke bomb. She set it off, and ran while Jurgis went into a breathing fit. Jurgis did manage to finally grab hold of her, though, by the wrist. There was the sound of a crack, and Fuji let out a loud yell, and fell to the ground.

"Now I'll finish you…" Jurgis bent down to grab onto her neck, but was greeted by a large pole to the back of the head. He looked back, and saw Leo LeBlanc staring back at him, holding onto a metal pole which was generally used to hold flags.

"Ari, you idiot, what are you doing here?" asked Fuji in a shout.

"Like I've ever listened to you before, Fuji," Leo smiled, and dodged Jurgis, spinning the pole once and landing a blow in his stomach. Jurgis doubled over for a moment, but soon recovered.

On another part of the ship, Heiji, Ally and Odori went to hurriedly packing the instrument cases into orange rubber life rafts. While moving away a drum kit, Heiji found something quite interesting; a master control to the bombs.

"All right!" Ally whooped, "Thank God we've got Heiji with us, huh, Dori? He'll know exactly how to disable this!"

"Right. Thank the gods, finally, after twenty years, you're proving useful, Heiji!" said Odori with a relieved smile.

"Um… Yeah…." Heiji chuckled nervously as he looked over the huge control panel, "I actually… Have… Never seen a set up like this before…"

"WHAT?" Odori and Ally shrieked.

"Then start cutting wires, Hacker! I've got a baby to go home and feed!" Odori shouted, holding her sword to Heiji.

"Yeah, yeah, fine… Just let me… Let me think… I think this'll disable all of them…" Heiji reached forward, undid a wire, and there was a blast following this.

Up top, the guests broke out into a panic as they watched a cabin from below explode into flames. Ryo, Toshiro, Yukiko and Inspectors Gluckman, Tomas and Zenigata tried desperately to calm them down, but they still hurried about like scared sheep. It was only when Yukiko fired her gun into the air did they shut up.

"Get into the boats in an orderly fashion—NOW!" Nina shrieked in a surprisingly loud voice.

Fuji, Leo and Jurgis also saw the explosion. Jurgis gave a laugh, and took advantage of Leo's briefly distracted state of mind. He grabbed the pole from LeBlanc, and hit him across the face with it, sending Leo flying back. Leo fell, and Jurgis went to stomp down on the disabled man's chest with his size fourteen military boot, but was shot by Fuji with a flare gun she had found before he could lay the final deadly blow. Fuji stood there, panting, tired and worn, glaring down Jurgis.

As she went to speak, there was another explosion, and she and Jurgis went flying. Leo grabbed onto his sister's hand and shielded her from the blast with his arms, and Jurgis went sailing over both of them. Fuji crawled away from Leo as the blast subsided, and saw Jurgis clinging onto the edge of the ship for dear life.

"Fujiko, please, help me!" Jurgis yelled to her. Fuji stood, and gulped.

"Leo, get me a rope!" said Fuji after a pause.

"What?" Leo shrieked, "He just–"

"Do it!" Fuji ordered. Leo found a hose from an emergency fire kit, and tossed it to her. Jurgis grabbed on, and began to climb on. When he got a good grip, he began to climb up, and Fuji held out one of her hands. Jurgis passed her hand and opted on to grabbing onto her neck—Tightly. He raised Fuji up off of the air, and she began to gasp for air. Leo gave a shout, and ran to Fuji. He threw his entire weight (225 pounds) into Jurgis, and Jurgis lost his grip on both Fuji and the hose, and tumbled down off into the green ocean. Fuji and he both fell to the ground, and Fuji crawled over to Leo, and embraced him.

"It's okay, Fuji—I've got you," said Leo, embracing her. He lifted her up, and walked to the boats, where the last of the passengers were being loaded into the life boats.

"Put her in here!" Yukiko ordered, pointing to the last boat.

"Hey, guys!" Heiji, Odori and Ally ran up to the raft, carrying the bomb, "Odori disabled the frigign' bomb!"

"How in the hell did she manage that?" asked a stunned Toshiro.

Odori blushed, "I picked the wire on the J circuit because that's what Jet Li's name begins with…"

"You're…. You're kidding…" Ryo shook her head, "Never mind, let's get the hell outta here!"

"Well, there goes our case…" Myra sighed as she watched the ship sink from the two holes it had already sustained.

"Don't get your hopes down yet," Fuji smiled, and pointed to the sky. The life rafts were floating upon the air, in large hot-air balloons. "Life raft that also floats… I thought I'd never use those…"

"I guess this means we get out break now, Myra," said Nina quietly, taking Myra's hand.

"And we'll have enough time to look into adopting a baby," replied Myra, leaning in and kissing Nina. Yukiko pushed her fedora over her eyes, and cleared her throat. Ryo began to whistle a tune.

Nina broke away from Myra, and looked at Max and Leo, "You know, one of them could always help us…"

"You're absolutely right, Nina—But which. I mean, the blonde's more attractive, but Mr. LeBlanc's more intelligent, by far…"

"Yeah, it's a tough call…" sighed Nina.

"We're right here!" Max shouted.

"Max, just relax, okay. What's the worst that could happen?" asked Leo with a laugh.

"It could come out looking like my father!" Max responded. There was a group shudder, and Myra turned to her girlfriend.

"I think we'll adopt, Dear."

Later that night, the Zenigatas' house:

"And today, none other than Lupin the Fourth and her gang, along with four Interpol inspectors, found what was perhaps the largest drug shipment ever seen on the West coast," said the reporter over the television. Max and Leo sat on the couch, Dako in between them.

Leo turned to Max, "You still mad they got away?"

"I'm more angry that that Jurgis creep got away…" said Max. "Especially after what he tried to do to you and your sister…"

"Fuji'll be okay…." Leo sighed, "Her ego's still a little shot, though. She hates admitting she was wrong…"

"That's a genetic thing, isn't it?" asked Max, laughing and pushing Leo a little. "So, you decide on your name yet?"

"Not yet," replied Leo with a shake of the head. "Just give me time…"

"All right," Max rested his head on Leo's shoulder, and Dako gave a sigh and an 'Oh, please!' expression.

A San Francisco Hotel:

"So, we agree on October then?" Toshiro asked as he sat across from Yukiko, a planner in between the two.

"Yeah, yeah…. Can we just have something shotgun?" asked Yukiko beggingly.

"Well… How about we figure this out later, then?" Toshiro replied, closing the book and kissing her. "It'll be okay… We'll work all of it out…"

"I'm gonna go grab a drink from the bar—You care to join?"

"No, thanks… I'm going to catch a nap," he yawned, and laid back. Yukiko smiled as she looked down at the sleeping Toshiro, and tilted her hat to a side. She whistled as she exited the hotel room, but this quickly changed as she felt a blade to her throat. She stiffened, and began to reach for her gun, only to have the blade drawn closer.

"Give this to your fiancé, tell him that I haven't forgotten him…" said a man in Japanese, in a thick rural tone.

He slipped a small pendant into her jacket pocket, and was soon gone. Yukiko turned about and drew her gun, but found no one there. She reached into her jacket pocket as she saw the coast was clear, and looked down at the pendant in her hand; the pendant with the Rat Clan insignia.


	18. I Left My Heart in San Francisco

DISCLAIMER: Heh, I'd have a car with air conditioning if I owned _Lupin the Third,_ don't you think?

Allo!

Sorry if this is coming out a little late… I had some bad computer problems and was on the phone with AOL for about an hour before resolving the problem… Anyway, yes, here is another installment which I hope everyone enjoys… I'm still taking requests for _Scrapbook Memories_…. And I just wanted to thank everybody again for all of their support over the years… Happy Independence Day to American readers!

P.S.: This chapter goes out to Yuki, who has once again graced me with inspiration. Domo arigato bows

Fun Fact of Boredom: Myra and Nina are based after two of the primary characters in the anime _Utena_. Although I've never seen an episode of it, unfortunately, I used what I knew from the series for a very loose basis.

Chapter Eighteen: I Left my Heart in San Francisco

San Francisco, California:

"Ryo-san, you're not going?" asked Fuji as she finished applying her makeup, looking back at Ryoko, who was watching her usual black and white Western drama while lied across the couch.

"Um, for some reason, watching my ex get married doesn't really appeal to me," replied Ryo as she looked out at the window at the clouds passing by.

"All right… We're going now, but we're leaving the Romeo here, so feel free to drive around a bit to get your mind off of things," Fuji gave a smile, and then exited with the rest of the Lupin gang soon after. Ryo sat up and rested her elbows upon her knees, and gave a heavy sigh. No wonder she was called the sulky one in all of those Lupin the Fourth fanpages Heiji had shown them. Maybe she was too serious for her own good.

She rose, and began to walk toward the bedroom; sleep would do her a world of good. Right before entering her room, the phone rang, and Ryo sighed, walked across the room and answered it, "It's on the dresser, Fuji, I'll bring it down…"

"Look outside your window," she gasped at the voice, and drew the curtain back. There stood Victor Lupin on a cell phone, looking back up at her and smiling. But what really caught Ryo's attention was the cherry red Thunderbird he was leaning against. "You wanna come take this for a test drive?"

"I… I'll be right down…" said Ryo, thinking about the Thunderbird the entire time and little of Victor. She slid into her sandals, and quickly walked down to meet him. She graced her hand over the hood, and smiled as she looked inside at the interior. Victor reached beneath the hood and popped it, and showed her the engine.

"Sweet God," said Ryo, crossing herself, "it's a Hemi…"

"Here," Victor tossed her the keys, and hopped into the passenger seat. "You know anywhere where you could run this at its max speed?"

"Heh, wait 'til I show you!" Ryo slammed down the hood, jumped into the driver's side and sped off, causing Victor to falter and fall out of his seat.

The Zenigata Household:

"You _never _told me Harry was doing this!" Max hissed to his mother as he pointed to the slightly breezy man dressed in a prayer shawl and yarmulke, "And where'd you find the priest? _Jesus Christ Superstar_ not touring anymore?" next to the breezy rabbi stood a breezy priest with long hair and sandals.

"They were the best I could find… I can't say a lot of people jumped to do this ceremony," replied Natasha in a quiet snap. "Turn around while I adjust your skullcap…"

"I can do it!" Max replied, fixing the pins on it and looking at himself in the mirror. He then looked at his mother and smiled, "How do I look?"

"More beautiful than your father's pension check," replied Natasha, kissing him on the cheek and then embracing him. "I can't believe you're actually getting married!"

"I'm already married, Mom."

"I don't count it because I wasn't there," replied Natasha, still holding onto him tightly. "G-d I love you…."

"I know, I know," Max patted her on the shoulder, and broke out of his embrace with her. "Well, almost time." He kissed her on the forehead and walked out onto the back yard. On Max's side sat the Zenigatas and the Yalkzaltas, Natasha's family. Max had to keep his cringe inward as he passed his Grandma Zenigata, who looked like his father plus thirty years and a white wig. On Leo's side sat the Lupins, the Ishikawas and the Jigens, as well as the Lupin the Fourth gang, minus Ally, who stood as Best Man. In spite of his and Leo's differences, they had both promised long ago to stand at one another's wedding. For bridesmaids they had Myra, Nina and Dako. When they had approached their daughter about becoming the flower girl she had practically killed both of them (saying she was too old, and that was childish), so they used a niece of Max's. One of his nephews served as the ring bearer.

The procession began, and Max walked down first, followed by Leo. There had been an argument on who would go first, so a coin was flipped earlier, and it was decided that way. They each went through vows, Max first, and then Leo, who was referred to as Leonard Lupin. Lupin the Third gave a smile at this; so he had accepted his family and its heritage, after all.

"Well," the priest closed the Bible, looked at the rabbi, and smiled, and then looked out at the crowd, "all is awesome and well, so now I pronounce you two husband and…. Husband… Congrats, dudes… Power to your people and all that…."

"Salom," said Harry, the rabbi.

"It's shalom, Harold. Sha-lom," Max said in a whisper.

"Oh, shalom!" Harry coughed uncomfortably, "Sorry, Max…"

"You know him?" Leo asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Only through force," Max replied in a whisper. "We used to go to school together, he'd always copy off of my notes…"

"If he copied off your notes and became a rabbi, does that mean you were actually good at that, Zenigata?"

"Never said I was bad at the school work, I just had a rough time behaving," Max answered.

"Dude, you can kiss him now if you want," said the priest to the two.

"Aren't you missing a beach cookout somewhere?" asked Max.

"Yeah, but Old Man Lupin's offering a totally excellent sum of money… So let's have it so we can get some punch!" said the priest in a California surfer tone.

"Well, you sure they won't mind? Jigen's squirming a little," said Max in a chuckle.

"They'll just have to deal," Leo leaned in and kissed Max, and Jigen Daisuke was then glad at that moment that he was so near being blind. Goemon pounded on his chest a few times as he felt his heart begin to beat a little irregularly, and then caught sight of Amaya's glare. He gave a nervous smile, and clapped along with her.

"Okay, I'm gonna go find me some booze," Yukiko rose after the happy couple walked down the aisle and out of sight.

"I second that," said Toshiro, rising.

"Third," Heiji added quickly, rising and walking out with the duo.

A San Francisco beach:

"You okay, Victor?" Ryo asked as she fishtailed the car along the empty beach once more.

"Yes," Victor lied, holding back a scream as Ryo sped toward at series of jagged rocks. She stopped it inches away, and then laughed at Victor's stunned expression.

"You've got suspension from hell on this thing!" Ryo said as she reversed the car and then got back onto the highway. "Well, you're still a jerk, but I think this is just what I needed…"

"I suppose I'll forgo any argument and take that as a compliment," said Victor with a raised eyebrow.

"Sounds good… Hey, I think I know a racetrack around here!" said Ryo.

"Maybe we should grab a bite to eat… It's about dinner time, anyway…" replied Victor quickly. Ryo was not only a lot of work, but she was a speed freak, and that combination frightened Victor to his very core.

"Okay… Anywhere in particular? I kinda feel like seafood…"

And she was expensive, to top it off.

"Sounds good," Victor said with a shrug. Ryo slammed on the gas, and Victor clung on for dear life, praying that she'd stop at the first place they reached. He didn't even care how expensive it was… His life was priceless.

The Zenigata Household, Later that Evening:

"Hey, we've got a party down there!" said Leo as Max continued to lead him up the stairs by the hand. In one instance Leo tripped and landed on his jaw. "Yeouch!"

"Oh, you okay?" asked Max worried as he helped Leo rise.

"It's just my chin… And my pride…" replied Leo. "Hey, hey—Zenigata, what in the hell are you doing!" Leo yelped as Max lifted him and carried him down the hall.

"Carrying you over this threshold," replied Max as he kicked open his door and then closed it behind him. He sat Leo down and kissed him.

"I'm_ so_ going to start putting saltpeter in everything you eat!" Leo snapped. "Maybe it'd keep you from acting so much like, like—Like my father!"

Max looked down at Leo, and laughed. "I've got a minifridge up here… I'll get you some ice to put on that war wound of yours, soldier…"

"All right," Leo removed his glasses, and rubbed his eyes and face; he was more than a little tired from the routine of the day. Who would've thought getting married would take so much out of you? He kicked off his shoes and removed his jacket, and lied down upon the bed. The party had been going on for hours, and it was to the point where all of the Jigens were getting drunk, the Yalkzaltas were talking politics to a point where they were becoming near violent (the entire family was police officers or military personnel), the Ishikawas were attempting to round up their children, the Lupins were putting lampshades upon their heads and the Zenigatas simply glared at all about them suspiciously. They wouldn't really miss him. He felt his eyes grow heavy and he yawned, and by the time Max returned, he was asleep.

"He's lucky I'm a gentleman," said Max as he took a blanket and covered Leo with it. He leaned down and kissed him on the cheek, and his euphoria was soon shattered by the sound of loud clashing. There was soon after Yiddish and Japanese shouts being returned, and Max sighed, and turned toward the doorway, "Better go play peacemaker… Good night, Ari…"

"G'night," Leo yawned, and rolled over in the bed. Max smiled, and switched off the light to their room before walking down the stairs and back into the mass of friends and relatives.

"Yo, Zenigata, this means we're siblings now!" said an obviously drunk Fuji as she spotted Max and draped an arm about him, "Does… Does that mean I like, kissed my brother… God, that's sooo damn sick! Khe hee hee hee…"

That laugh, that obnoxious laugh. Fuji reeked of booze and Chanel. "I think you need to switch to ginger ale…"

"Are you kidding—I have no friggin' clue what this crap is, but I like it!" said Fuji, taking another swig of a yellow liquid with Israeli writing. Max blinked in surprise; lamp oil. Where had she even found lamp oil?

"O-kay… Ginger ale… Definitely," Max said, taking the lamp oil from her hands and walking back into the kitchen with it.

Fuji smiled, and stumbled over and onto Goemon, "Heya, sailor, wanna dance?" she asked drunkenly.

"Eh…" Goemon looked down at her with reasonable worry.

"Heh, amateur. I'll take this, Goemon," Yukiko sighed, and unhanded Goemon from Fuji.

Fuji wiped her mouth and let out another long laugh, and leaned against Yukiko, "You gotta admit, he's got a nice ass for an old guy…" she looked at Yukiko and smiled, "And you're pretty, for a girl… I'm not gay or anything, ah hell, no! Ha ha! I hate women, in all honesty… All bunch a'… Stab backers! Where'd that booze go?"

"I give it five minutes before she falls into the pool," said Yukiko to Goemon with a sigh as Fuji stumbled off toward another destination. "She's right, though."

"Yes, well, Toshiro has very good taste," said Goemon with a smile.

"Yeah… I was talking about that other thing, but okay," Yukiko winked and nudged Goemon, "Come on, I've gotta talk to you about something…" she led him off, and out into the back yard.

"The Rat Clan? You're positive?" asked Goemon after Yukiko had explained the situation to him.

"Yep. Look," Yukiko tossed him the pendant she had been given a few weeks ago, and Goemon studied it, and sighed.

"Well, if it's one man, it shouldn't be a problem…." said Goemon, "Toshiro will protect you."

"Yeah, you're probably right… I just don't want him to freak out, though," Yukiko replied as she put the pedant back in her pocket and looked toward the pool. "I had a hell of a time breaking it to him that he wasn't my first boyfriend… He's always been like that, though… Protective, naïve, overbearing… A lot like you…"

"I won't deny it," Goemon shrugged. "Shall we return?"

"Sounds good," replied Yukiko with a newfound reassurance.

A Seafood Restaurant:

"And that's how I managed to break both of my arms for the third time… How about you, what was your first date like?" asked Ryo as she cracked open the left pincher of her lobster and began to fish out the meat within.

"Eh, not quite as interesting as that," replied Victor with a few blinks while he still tried to register this. "It was with some father's friend's daughter… Real annoying girl, come to think of it… I don't see her much anymore… She got married a year ago."

Ryo raised an eyebrow as she watched Victor's expressions change while he said this, and she gave a laugh, "That jealous, neh?"

"I only tried to have him killed once… Twice if you count cutting his brakes…"

"Why didn't that happen? Cut brakes should've done him in…"

"Apparently I couldn't tell the difference between a brake line and a sparkplug," Victor admitted, taking another sip of his wine. Ryo gave a small giggle at this.

"How'd you mistake that?"

"Quite easily… Not all of us while away most of hours knee-deep in car grease," replied Victor as he cracked open the crab he had ordered.

"Heh, but everyone should know some car repair…" replied Ryo, "I'll teach you if you want."

"Maybe on the second date… There's go to be one, right?"

"That's a really pathetic way to ask me out, Victor," Ryo answered quickly. "And as of now I'm not sure…"

"Great, another one gone," Victor grumbled and leaned back in his chair a little, placing his hands in his lap and looking upward with a mixture of annoyance and self loathing.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It may come as a bit of a shock to you, but… I feel like there's almost a curse upon me…"

"I wouldn't be surprised… Enough people hate you…"

"I treat women as best as I possibly can… I buy them the nicest things, say every damn thing those books say to say…"

"Books? You read?"

"Yes!" Victor slammed his wine glass down, "Even that jackass Ari managed to get someone… Even if it is a Zenigata…"

"Are you telling me you're bi?" asked Ryo, blinking a few times in surprise.

"Might as well be… I might have more luck in that category…" replied Victor sorrowfully.

"Wow… Um…" Ryo noted now that many people had stopped their eating, and were looking at Victor, who was hunched over on the booth table and mumbling to himself. Ryo frowned and kicked him in the shin, "You need to quit feeling sorry for yourself about it!"

"Heh, that's rich coming from the sulky Lupin gang member…"

"I do not sulk!"

"No, you watch those God-awful black and white Westerns."

"Hank Williams is God, and that's that."

"You tried to throw yourself off of a bridge two years ago… You've tried other ways to end your existence, too…."

"Who the hell told you that?" Ryo demanded angrily.

"I have info on all of the Lupin the Fourth members… How do you think I know where you are at all times? Maybe I should become a detective… I could catch you guys… What do you say, hm?"

"I say you can kiss my ass," Ryo stood and stormed out of the restaurant angrily. Victor quickly laid down a few bills and ran out after Ryo. Ryo was already inside the car and starting it up, and Victor managed to quickly jump in before she took off from zero to sixty in a matter of seconds. Ryo said nothing to Victor, even while he berated her for not stopping and nearly killing him.

"I know you don't value your own life greatly, but that doesn't mean you don't have to respect mine!" Victor shouted angrily.

"You couldn't possibly sound more cold saying that… 'I've heard you've tried to'…. Ohhhh…. You sound like some sort of damn robot!" Ryo yelled, loosing her famous laid back personality. "It's people like you who I hate—Those people who just talk about everything and sound so damn casual!"

"In other words, yourself," Victor concluded.

"God_ damn_ I hate you…"

"I love you," Victor said after a long pause between the two.

"You're really annoying, Victor… What do you see in me, anyway, huh? Whatever happened to Odori?"

"She's in love with someone who's the head of a powerful clan… I let her go due to the fact I love my life…" replied Victor, "As for you… I like it when you call me a jerk… You're the only woman besides Ishikawa who told me what they really thought… A lot of other women just say things because of who my family's descended from… They weren't sincere… I love your sincerity, Jigen, even if it's sincere disgust."

"Do you like twisting peoples' emotions around, or does it come naturally to you?" asked Ryo as she made a turn back towards the beach.

"Well, every Lupin's got a gift… Mine, it seems, is to make people hate me…" replied Victor with a shrug. "Where're we going?"

"Back to the beach. I want to see a sunrise. I've never seen one on this coast before," Ryo answered.

"That's seven hours away," a confused Victor looked down at his watch, and then back up at Ryo with clear confusion on his expression.

"What, you can't talk to me until then?" asked Ryo, looking over at Victor and glaring.

"Um… I suppose…"

"Good, then," Ryo made another turn, and soon they were on their way to the beach once again.

The Zenigata Residence:

"Hm? How long was I out?" Leo Lupin yawned and stretched, and looked up at the cat-clock upon the guest room wall, "Three in the morning? Jeeze!" He lied his head back down, but found that he could not easily fall back to sleep. He could feel a presence staring at him. He quietly raised his head, and then tumbled out of bed in surprise as he saw a figure sitting in a lounge chair in the corner of the room. He uprighted himself and gave a sigh of relief as he saw it was only his father.

"Dad, what are you doing in here?" asked Leo as he sat upon the bed and looked up at his father questioningly, "You know, I'm a little old for you to watch me sleep… It's kinda creepy…."

"Ha ha…. You may change your name, but you can't change your sense of humor," replied Lupin with a smile as he rose from the chair and moved himself onto the bed next to his son. "I'm kind of reluctant to sit on here for fear of what you and your blond bride have already done…"

"Nothing, actually," Leo replied with some concern. "Where is Max, anyway?"

"He's downstairs helping with cleanup," replied Lupin with a sly smile.

"And you're hiding out here, huh, and avoiding all of the work?"

"Guilty!" Lupin gave another smile and held up his hands in surrender, "My, you really are a good detective, you know that!"

"How about Dako? Where's she?"

"Raiding Natasha's closet," replied Lupin with a small laugh. "Mrs. Zenigata's still got a lot of nice clothing and jewelry from her undercover years…."

"Did you and Max's mom really…"

"All water under the bridge over the River Kwai, Ari," Lupin answered, nudging his son a little. "So, how's it feel, hm?"

"How's what feel?"

"Married?"

"A little surreal, still… Took a while to find the right one, but I managed… I'm pretty sure…"

"You know, I have another wedding gift for you…"

"Dad, you're already letting me and Max move into the house, taking care of Dako and helping take care of the baby… There's nothing else you possibly could…"

Lupin removed a pocket watch from his jacket pocket, and Leo fell silent, "Remember this?"

"Sure, but I haven't seen it in… In years!" Leo replied as he took hold of it and studied it for a long while, "How'd you find it? I had this stolen!"

"It came up for auction in Moldova," replied Lupin.

"Where in the hell is—"

"Heh, the middle of nowhere…. That's why it sparked my attention," Lupin answered. He rose and patted his son on the shoulder, "Well, I'm gonna go try my luck downstairs now… Max ought to be coming up soon…"

"Thanks, Dad," Leo muttered, and placed the watch in his pocket.

"Moldova?" he repeated when his father had exited, "Is that where you went to?" A few minutes later, Max entered, looking disheveled and exhausted. "What in the heck happened to you?"

"Your father, who insisted on a dance with the other groom," replied Max as he rubbed the back of his neck and kicked off his shoes. "You're lucky, you missed it… Fuji fell into the pool and Heiji had to fish her out… She faked getting water in the lungs, so Heiji gave her mouth-to-mouth, and that just turned out into a big make-out session, and he ended up throwing Fuji back into the pool."

Leo gave a small laugh, "Poor Fuji… She can never win, huh?"

"Nope… See, the good guys always win," Max sat down next to Leo and kissed him. "I think we'll let the old gang get together and have their fun… We'll just stay up here and have a gay ole' time…"

"If you ever use that word in that context again I'll shoot you," Leo said with a small laugh. "You got the tickets for the vacation?"

"Yeah, but there's a problem… I couldn't get them for Jamaica…"

"Where're we going, then?"

"There were some great sales on flights to New Orleans…"

Leo blinked a few times in disbelief, pushed Zenigata back, "Bastard! No flights to Jamaica my ass! You did that on purpose!"

A Hotel Room near the Zenigata house:

"I said I was sorry, what in the hell else do you want, friggin' blood?" Fuji shrieked. Heiji remained stoic as he typed in figures on his laptop, paying no attention to the Lupin flailing her arms about in front of him.

"I thought you were dead!" Heiji yelled, slamming down his laptop and rising to meet her eye-to-eye. "There's lousy tricks, and then there's lousy, Fuji! And that was the worst kind! I'm going to my room…. Good night Fujiko."

"Yeah, _konbanwa_ (good evening)…. Jerk…." Fuji grumbled as she seated herself at the chair Heiji had been sitting at and sat there with her arms folded. She then looked about and smiled as she saw the coast was clear, and opened the laptop once again. She began to type away, looking around every so often for the presence of someone.

"What are you doing?" Fuji jumped and nearly let out a scream as she heard Odori's familiar voice, and the samurai walked out of a shadowed corner, Namiko asleep in her arms.

"How do you keep the baby so quiet?" asked Fuji with wonder.

"I put her grandfather on the phone… He starts to speak and she's out like a light… Not much unlike when I was young," Odori replied. "You still haven't answered my question…"

"I heard some info from Goemon and Yukiko… The Rat Clan's after your brother's girlfriend, apparently… I bugged Yukiko while she pulled me off of Goemon…. I'm a good fake drunk…"

"You're a better fake idiot…"

"Well, you have to admit, it's better to underestimate me…"

"Not for the bad guys."

"Hon, we _are_ the bad guys…."

"That short hair doesn't say that," replied Odori.

Fuji ran her fingers through her hair and gave a shrug and a sigh, "Fujiko Lupin… The saint of sinners…"

"Anyway, what's this on the Rat Clan?"

"I'm concerned, because I've been hearing stuff lately… Stuff I don't like… I want you to go start watch for me…"

"Tonight?"

"Preferably… If you can't go, at least teach me…"

"Teach you what?"

Fuji turned to Odori and smiled, "How to be a ninja."

"No way… I despise ninjas. Samurai and ninja like oil and water…. They don't blend… You mix them and you end up with Toshiro. There's no way I could teach you that…"

"Then I need you to promise me you'll do what I ask for you. You're not Ari's protector anymore, you're everyone's…" said Fuji, glancing down at the stirring Namiko. "I don't think is just one guy after Yuki… There's more, and I think they're going to go after all of us…"

Odori looked downward at her daughter and nodded, "All right, you've got it… But why are you asking all of this of me, and with such foreign seriousness?"

"Because you're the best, of course!" Fuji gave a wide smile, "Here, could I hold my niece for a few seconds, hm?"

"Good way to play upon my ego… You may hold her as long as you're careful," said Odori cautiously.

"Dori, I'm not gonna field goal the kid, I just want to hold her," replied Fuji, holding out her hands. Odori nodded and passed Fuji the baby, and Fuji leaned back in her chair as she became comfortable with Namiko, "There we go… Heh, I think she's dreaming… Her foot's twitching… She gets that same annoyed look you get, hee hee… Wow, maybe if I ever get drunk enough I'll have one of my own! Heiji's brains, my beauty… It's only right!"

"You seen Ryoko around? I'm only asking because she owes me money…"

"No, actually… Jeeze, this airhead act must really be getting to me if I'm starting to lose track of my own teammates."

"Hm, no comment. I'm going to set her to sleep now…" Odori took the baby from Fuji's hands and walked into her hotel room. Fuji turned back to the computer and smiled. On the outside there may have been a smile on Lupin's face, but on the inside she was more than a little concerned for her friends.

Although she had not told Odori this, there was something else Fuji was working on, for the sake of her brother. It hadn't been easy switching out his and Max's flight from Jamaica to one in New Orleans, but she had managed, even with her own minor hacking ability.

"And now I need to find a way to be here and in New Orleans at the same time… How in the world am I going to manage that? Hm…. You know, in a pair of heels, she might work…"

The Beach, Several Hours Later:

"Well, wake up, there's that sunrise you wanted," Victor sighed as he shook Ryo awake. She motioned for him to go away, and she yawned tiredly and leaned against him. The two were in the front seat of the car, Ryo in the driver's side with a gray sports coat draped over her. Victor nudged her again, and she grumbled, but opened her eyes and sat up.

"Heh, the people in Japan'll be waking up in a few hours…" Victor said as he watched the sun begin to rise. "When do they expect you back at Lupin H.Q.?"

"Oh my God—Fuji! She's gonna be pissed!" Ryo immediately sprung to life and started up the car, and sped off toward the hotel.

"Damn it, you could've warned me!" Victor growled as he continued to hold onto the emergency handle for dear life.

A San Francisco Airport:

"You sure you'll be okay to fly back to France with my parents, Dako?" asked Leo as he kneeled down to face the girl at eye-level.

"Yeah… You two just have a nice honeymoon… And bring me back stuff," replied Dako as she embraced Leo. She then turned to Max and held out his hand, and shook it, "If Leo comes back and tells me you were mean to him I'll kick you down a flight of stairs, Max…"

"Um, are you sure she isn't yours biologically?" asked Zenigata.

"Sometimes I just don't know, really," Max sighed, and picked up his carryon onto one shoulder. "Well, at least we'll have a couple of good replacements to give Fuji the runaround… Let someone other than us get made into idiots for once…"

"That's not nice to say at all!" Leo said to Max chidingly. "It was extremely nice for Myra and Nina to take the case out of our hands for two weeks!"

"Suckers," Max chuckled. He smiled at Leo and slapped him gently on the behind. "Well, toy boy, you ready to go?"

"Eh… Sure…" a red-in-the-face Leo added, picking up his carryon and following Max onto the flight. Zenigata turned to Natasha, who had immediately broken out into a small prayer.

"I'd like to learn that language, Nana," said Dako to Natasha as they walked over to the plastic airport seats and sat down. Natasha and Zenigata were Nana and Ojiisan; Lupin and Fujiko were Grandpa and Grandma.

"Hebrew?" asked Natasha, "Or Yiddish?"

"Leo and Max speak Yiddish when they're yelling, and Hebrew when they're talking about something they don't want me to know about, like my birthday… And they also speak in Japanese a lot, but I'm starting to pick up on it… You guys speak it funny, though," she finished, directly addressing Zenigata with this last comment.

The old man smiled and ruffled her hair a little bit, "Well, next time you come over we'll have to teach you some more… Right now here's _bakaro__ ko _(I'm not going to translate that…) and Fujiko…" sighed Zenigata as he hung his head and shook it.

"Heya, Pops, thanks for taking care of Dako for us…" said Lupin as he lifted up the young girl and gave his trademark laugh… The laugh that sounded like nails being run against a chalkboard in Zenigata's mind. "So, Dako, what do you want me to teach you today? How to pick a lock? How to make a quick disguise?"

"If you even—" Zenigata began, only to be met with another long string of that obnoxious laughter.

"Pops, you haven't changed a bit… The U.N. and U.E. _pardoned _me…. Remember? I'm on your side now, Old Man!"

"But that doesn't make up for the past!" Zenigata growled.

"Please… You grew up in that generation when pot was given out like Halloween candy… You mean to tell me you never broke a single law? That, Zenigata, is something I fail to believe… That must've been a fun generation…"

"We had friggin' bomb raids when I was growing up!" Zenigata shouted. "We hid under our damn desks and waited for the foreigners!"

"So, Natasha, how's life been?" asked Fujiko as she turned her attention away from her husband and Zenigata, choosing to ignore them.

"Not bad…" Natasha admitted with a shrug, "I took up fencing… You?"

"Therapy," Fujiko answered nonchalantly.

"Oh, wow… I didn't know you had it so…"

"No, I _give _therapy… And guess who my star guinea pig is?" Fujiko smiled and patted Lupin's hand. "By the end of the night we had him crying in the group session about his father…"

"Hey, isn't that supposed to be confidential?" Lupin shouted.

"At least I didn't tell them about the bed wetting thing," Fujiko replied with a shrug.

"F-Fujiko!" Lupin shrieked over Zenigata's laughter.

"There's nothing to be ashamed about, Lover… It's normal for some teenagers…"

"Would you shut up?" Lupin yelled in anger as Zenigata burst into even louder laughter, "At least I didn't have some sick fascination with my mother!"

"Hmm… Denial… I'll have to make a note for that for our next one on one session…" said Fujiko.

"One on one?" Lupin stopped, and smiled, "Oh, baby, it's been forever since we've had on of those! Kheh hee hee hee…."

Fujiko sighed and grabbed him by the tie, and led him towards their gate, "Come on… It's been forever since you've bought me something expensive…"

"Me, too!" Dako chimed in as she walked away with Fujiko and Lupin, who continued to be led along by the tie, as well as led by something else…

"That little creep deserves everything he gets!" Zenigata said with a satisfied smile.

"Hmm… Come to think of it… Fujiko brought up quite an interesting point…" Natasha said to a quickly worried Zenigata as she threw her arms about his neck, "You haven't really done anything for me in a while, Koichi…"

"Heh, wha…?"

"Come on, a new military surplus store opened up and they have these Kevlar vests to die for…"

"And why would you need one of those?" asked Zenigata suspiciously.

"New defense class I'm teaching… Militia tactics…" replied Natasha with a smile, "C'mon, Koichi… It closes at four!"

"Crap…" Zenigata grumbled, "Well, at least she's nothing like the first wife…"

New Orleans:

Fuji stepped off the plane with her carryon, as well as something additional strapped to her back. It was little Namiko, sound asleep and dressed in a pink Hello Kitty one-piece footy outfit. She looked about nervously left and right, and then picked up the rest of her luggage.

"You must be my good luck charm, Nami… No sign of blondie or bro… I guess that's good, though…" Fuji said in a whisper as she rolled the luggage along and hailed a cab. She held Namiko in her lap for the car ride, and grew worried when Nami began to wail.

"Eh, here… Um…" Fuji fumbled as she began to look through her baby bag for a bottle. "Please stop crying…. Um, can't you see that noise makes me feel like taking a gun to my head and dying…" Fuji sand nervously as she found that there was no sign of a bottle.

The cab driver looked at her in his rearview with warm amusement, "Tha a youngin?" he asked in a thick Southern drawl.

"Oh, yeah… I'm still learning how these things work…"

"Soun's like she need a diapah change…"

Fuji looked up in wide-eyed horror. She had forgotten about the diaper-changing aspect of babysitting.

California:

"How in the hell does she carry these things, anyway?" asked Odori as she rubbed her back a little and then adjusted the enlarged bust she was wearing, "How in the hell did I get talked into this, anyway?" she muttered as she looked in the mirror and saw Fuji in the reflection. She could do a decent impersonation of Lupin, but it was still difficult on her back… And her feet… She rubbed her sore ankles that had been subjected to Fuji's rigid high-heels and grumbled once again, "I'll take wooden sandals over these any day!"

"I'm home!" Ryo said in a pant as she tumbled in, "Fuji, sorry I had to run out… I… I needed milk, that's right… Um, Fuji, you okay?"

"Hn?" Odori asked, tilting her head to a side, _'Oh, that's right… Fall into cheerleader mode… Let's hope I can pull this off… __Fuji__ owes me **so much for this**.'_

"Um, Fuji, you okay? You look sort of angry…" said Ryo.

"I'm fine, Ryo-san! Are you sure you weren't at those bars picking up a hot date?" asked Odori in her best Fuji impression. Inwardly she was thinking_, 'Someone shoot me now…. Please!'_

"Heh, you caught me… Hey, where're Odori's sandals? They're usually by the door…" said Ryo with slight concern.

"Odori went back to spend some time with her family and do some Shinto, Buddhist stuff… She's such a dedicated warrior…" said 'Fuji' with a sigh.

"Really? You usually call her a vindictive bitch…"

"She-I what? Oh my, my, my… That doesn't sound like me at all!" said Odori with a chuckle, _'I'm going to kill her…'_

"Um… Yeah… You been drinking again?"

"Yeah, a little…" Odori nodded, _'I so wish… I could drink one of those two-liter sake bottles by myself right now…'_

"I'm gonna sleep… Okay, bye!" Ryo waved her off, and began to walk toward her hotel room.

"Why do you smell like Imperial cigarettes? Victor smokes those…"

Ryo gave a stunned look, and said nothing, but exited into her room, "Damn she's good… Even when she's drunk!" Ryo admitted with a whisper to herself.

"Well, that was traumatic… What next?" asked Odori, wiping the sweat from her forehead.

"Fuji," Odori spun around, and saw Heiji standing in front of her, his hands in his pockets and his laptop beneath one arm.

"Of course…" Odori rolled her eyes and rubbed her forehead, "What do you want—I, I mean…. How can I help you, Heiji-chan…"

"Listen, I'm sorry… I know I had a whole night to think this over, and I came to some conclusions…" Heiji sighed heavily, "I've been acting like a total jerk, and I guess it's just the bullheaded Zenigata in me talking…"

"Well, nobody's perfect!" Fuji said in a chipper tone. She went to exit, quickly, but was grabbed by the wrist by Heiji. She looked back at him pleadingly and knew her life was at a new low point.

"Did you… Shrink?" Heiji noticed the slight difference in their heights that hadn't been there before, and he began to take a closer look at her.

"What? Oh, I'm just dieting!"

"Oh… Okay…" Heiji nodded, "So, anyway, I've been a jerk and you've been a jerk, but we can put it behind us now… If you're willing to give it a try, I am, too… I guess your brother's wedding made me realize it… Weird, huh?"

"Oh, yeah, totally…"

"Jeeze, your pulse… You okay, you feel like you're going to have a heart attack!"

"I'm fine… Just runs in my family!" Odori waved this off nervously and gave and girlish chuckle.

"I really worry about you sometimes…" Heiji leaned in and kissed her, and Odori about fainted. She let out a long yell and pushed away, running into the bathroom. Heiji blinked a few times, stunned, and said to the rest of the group as they peeked out to see who had been murdered, "I guess she really is afraid of commitment…"

"No kiddin'," Ally muttered.

Odori, meanwhile, downed about half a bottle of mouthwash, and began to brush her teeth madly, "I know we're not blood related but…. Eck! My brother! Fujiko Lupin, you are going down, bitch…"

New Orleans:

"Hey, c'mon now!" Leo let out a laugh as he tried to focus his camera. Max was a little too busy to worry about this, however. He had resided to leaning next to Leo, and Lupin (formally LeBlanc, formally Lupin) was having difficultly focusing in on his shot of historic building with his family name upon it.

"You look like a stereotypical Asian tourist with that camera," sighed Max as he rested his chin on Leo's shoulder and looked up at the sign. "It's a jewelry store… Go figure…"

"Hhmp. Maybe I could risk heading in there…"

"What, are you looking for a new set of earrings?" asked Max.

"Yes, for my part-time lover I have on the side, Zenigata," Leo sighed, gripping onto his forehead.

"Ha! Made you admit it!" said Max with a triumphant smile.

"Would you get mad at me if I said I married you for your looks?"

"Jeeze… Who leaves the damn hotel room on their honeymoon, anyway?" sighed Max with some sadness as he walked into the store with Leo. Lupin approached the jeweler and removed the pocket watch from his jean pocket, and set it down on the glass countertop.

"How much would it cost to fix it up?" asked Leo as he removed his wallet and pulled out a credit card. The man's eyes lit as he saw the VISA logo on the card, and he asked Leo quickly.

"How soon do you want it?"

"By Saturday… I'm going to give it to my son," replied Leo with a smile.

"Ah…" he nodded, and looked down at Leo's new wedding ring, and then at Max's matching band. He only saw Zenigata from behind, however, "When is your wife expecting?"

"My wife? Oh, I'm separated from the woman… I'm getting the baby though," Leo explained with a smile.

"Ah… I see… Well, you're lucky that this new one's a blond…"

"Yeah, Max is really something else… What, I'm not sure…"

"I could put yours and her name on it… What is it, short for Maxine?"

"Ehhh…" Leo looked at the jeweler a few moments nervously, then at Max, '_Wow, he sort of does look like a woman from behind…' _Leo realized as he kept his eyes upon Max.

"How about you just repair it?" asked Leo with a nervous smile.

"Okay… Let's take a look at… My… There's something in here…"

"Say what?" Leo asked, leaning inward to getting a closer inspection.

"It looks like a small note of some sort…" the jeweler took out a piece of paper and unfolded the tiny shred.

"Does it say anything?" asked Leo, looking like a small child with great curiosity.

"Yes…_ On the day when I am tired and disappointed and weary of life, I will come to you down there, in your little Arab house ... in that little white house, where you are waiting for me..._ It make any sense to you?"

"Arsène Lupin… From the book _The Crystal Stopper_…." replied Leo in a numb mumble. He took hold of the paper, and realized it was far from his great-grandfather's handwriting. The paper was possibly only seven or eight years old…

"You all right?" asked the jeweler.

"Leo, you okay?" Max turned about and placed a hand on his partner's shoulder.

The jeweler gave a stunned look in Max's direction, "You're a bloody man!"

Meanwhile, Fuji was walking down the street of the jeweler, lugging her luggage to the hotel next door, "Damn it… No love for the chick with the baby…" she grumbled as she reached the hotel and checked in. She was more than relieved when the bellboy took up her luggage, and she rubbed her hands and removed the baby carrier momentarily to remove her blue jacket, "It's hot out, Nami…" she lifted the young girl back up onto her shoulders, and went on her way in search of Leo and Max.

"Well, Namiko, we're going to take care of the last door in my brother's past, and then I guess I can let go of Ari forever… It won't be easy, though… You were just one baby, though, so you wouldn't understand… I shared a womb with this guy for nine months," Fuji said to the infant, who really could care less but drooled while listening to her babysitter, regardless.

Fuji continued on her long monologue, and changed her plan from looking for her brother and in-law to looking for an ice cream stand. With a backpack of baby supplies, Namiko strapped to her front, and her jacket and purse in one arm, she began to feel more and more like a pack-mule. She was grateful to finally find a vendor, and purchased a vanilla ice cream cone, which she shared with her young accomplice.

"Anyway, like I was saying… Damn this ice cream's great!... Anyhow, this is my wedding gift to my brother… He'll be able to totally let go of his past after this… You know, like the last nail on a box you never want to open again? Like that box full of my pictures as a kid," Fuji shuddered. "I only hope to God that the press doesn't get hold of any of those… Sure, maybe it's vain, but it's who I chose to be… Hopefully you won't be anything like your Auntie Fuji when you grow up… That includes the thieving thing, young lady… My looks are going to waste in this business…"

"Lupin!" she heard in a familiar American accent, and she looked over her shoulder with a smile, "Well, Namiko, I hope you've got your running shoes on, 'cause here's the friggin' cavalry!"

"Max, no, this is Myra and Nina's problem for the next two weeks!" shouted Leo angrily as he ran after Max, who was running after Fuji, who was carrying the puzzled Namiko.

"I don't care! As long as there's a Lupin, there'll be a Zenigata to chase them!" replied Max as he nearly dodged a Cajun funeral procession. Leo wasn't as lucky, and became jumbled in the crowd of people playing instruments or following the black casket with flowers adorning it. The casket fell slid into the street as Leo fell into one of the pallbearers and several cars proceeded to smash into one another. Leo ducked into the first building he could.

It took his eyes a few moments to adjust to the dim lighting… He turned about and jumped a little at the numerous Voodoo decorations covering every inch of the smoky, red-lit bar. He dodged out of the way of the fake (he hoped) shrunken head, and shakily seated himself at a small table.

"Drink, Monsieur?" asked the waitress.

"Um… Wow, bourbon would be really good right now, but I really—"

"One bourbon it is," she said, and soon vanished before Leo could protest any further.

"Great… I'm gonna be friggin' stumbling out of here…" Leo sighed as the bottle arrived. One sip, and next thing he knew, the bottle would have vanished… Then he'd be drunk enough to start on the really hard liquors.

He poured himself a glass and took a small sip of it… It's been so long since he'd had anything like the bourbon… Certainly there'd been champagne at the wedding, but nothing like what his was currently drinking.

His attention was soon drawn to the stage, where the first few notes of a guitar were being strummed. The hollowed out, tinny noise of the strings… It sounded so familiar… Dylan, maybe? Harrison? Clapton….

"Nah, nothing that big…" Leo muttered to himself, and took another sip of his drink. His vision blurred a moment, and he was convinced he was drunk after half a glass when he saw a red-head about his age scale up onto the stage and take her seat at a small stool.

"There's no way that is who I think that is…" Leo muttered as he took another long drink.

The red-head looked up into the audience, and the color drained from her face as she saw Leo in the audience.

She leaned inward and spoke into the microphone quietly, "This next song goes out to an old friend in the audience tonight… It's called _Nowhere__ Man_… It's an old Beatles tune, and I hope you all like it…"

"It really is you…" said Leo to himself in stunned awe.


	19. My Heart Belongs to Daddy

DISCLAIMER: If you're looking for someone who owns the rights, keep on looking….

Hallo!

Sorry this took a while to come out; lots and lots of paperwork… Did I mention I like paperwork like I like dental surgery? Yeah… But anyway, I finally got it out yay and hopefully the next chapter'll come out sooner… Thanks to everyone who reviewed and/or read my other story! If you haven't seen it yet, it's a one shot I did called _A Mile in My Heels_. Anyway, please enjoy this next chapter! On with the show!

Fun Fact of Boredom: Mankii-chan, the happy little cartoon character that is the bane of Leo Lupin's existence, is based off of _Hello Kitty _and takes his name from Monkey Punch (Mankii Panch) (obvious, no: ) .)

Chapter Nineteen: My Heart Belongs to Daddy

Leo set down his bourbon glass and then looked upward at the redhead once again in stunned silence. He heard someone approach him from behind, and look upward briefly, then doing a double take as he registered the face. "M-Max! How'd you know where I was?"

"Eh, you're a Lupin and I' m a Zenigata… We're yin and yang… Never really too far apart," Max replied as he seated himself at the same table as Leo and looked upward at the musician. "She's pretty good…."

"Yeah… Um, Max, about her…"

"Hm? What's up?"

"Nothing," Leo sighed in defeat and hung his head. He knew that he would eventually have to explain his past with this woman, though. It came sooner than he had wanted; her set ended and she stepped off stage, and scaled down the stage and seated herself at the same table as Leo and Max. She leaned over and embraced Leo, and kissed him on the cheek while a stunned Max poured himself a drink.

"You're the last person I expected to see here!" the woman laughed as she sat in her chair, resting her elbows upon the table and smiling. She looked over to Max and smiled, "And who's this cute guy with you? I like blonds..."

"Well, eh, Max is…" Leo started uneasily as he eyed Zenigata.

Max looked over to Leo and raised an eyebrow, "Yeah, what am I, Lupin?"

"We just got married," said Leo, looking downward at his shoes and the wooden floor.

"Cool! So you guys are like on honeymoons at the same time? Where're the wives? You leave them at home? Can't blame you… Spouses can be a pain" she asked with a laugh.

"No, eh, you don't understand… To one another…" Leo added with just as much uneasiness.

"Oh… Oh! Oh wow, that's terrific," she blinked a few times in surprise. "I never figured you'd…"

"Could someone _please_ tell me what the hell's going on?" asked Max pleadingly.

"Well, Arlene and I knew one another a while back," Leo responded, clearing his throat. "We sort of dated, I guess you could say…."

"Is this the one the psychiatrist said was the reason you mistrusted women?" Max inquired.

Leo gave a heavy sigh, "Yeah, Max… That's the one…"

"The psychiatrist? You ended up at a shrink?" Arlene blinked.

"Yeah. And prison," Leo said in a snap while he kept his eyes upon Max. "Might as well get that out into the open, too."

"Did you two, like, meet there?" asked Arlene.

"We actually met at work," Leo responded, and stiffened upright in his seat as Max placed a hand atop his. Max read this expression, grumbled, and stormed off into the men's room.

"Is he okay?" asked Arlene worriedly.

"He'll be okay… I'm still just adjusting to everything," Leo shrugged and sighed. "He's not the easiest to live with, but he's been there for me and he's always been honest… And I do love honesty…"

Arlene paused and bit her lip, "I'm sorry… I did a lot of stupid crap to you, and I said a lot of things you didn't deserve to get told…"

"You stole from me," Leo said firmly. "That's after you chewed me out for being a thief. You're a hypocrite."

"I'm sorry… If I could take it back, I would. I was a stupid kid, then, but now I've got a lot more responsibility. I've got a son, he's about eight now."

Leo paled and twitched, and Arlene laughed at his expression, "Don't worry, he's more than likely not yours. He's a sweetheart, though… You should meet him sometime."

"I've got to go, actually," Leo rose and pushed in his chair. "Just, um, answer me how my watch got to Moldova?"

"His father… He must've stolen it from me before he walked out," she sighed and shrugged. She smiled and looked upward at him. "I guess this is good-bye, then?"

"You bet," Leo responded with more sternness than usual.

"I don't blame you… He really seems to care about you… Take care, Lupin," she said quietly.

"Yeah… I'm gonna go fetch him," Leo shoved his hands in his pockets and stepped into the bathroom. Max was sitting on a couch in the bathroom, resting his forehead in his hands. He looked upward at Leo, and Lupin sighed and seated himself next to Zenigata.

"I told her good-bye once and for all," Leo said as he put an arm across Max's shoulders. "She's the past… An irresponsible liar… Now I've got you… And I trust you anywhere that isn't around an open window…"

Max laughed at this and looked upward at Leo, "You promise?"

"You have my word as a reformed thief and Keaneau Reeves fan…"

"Not if only he and Jude Law would do a movie we wouldn't have arguments come movie night," Max laughed.

Leo shrugged, "My dad's got some serious pull in a lot of circles; I'll see what I can manage. C'mon, we've got a whole city to see and I haven't even_ started_ drinking yet!" Leo pecked Max on the cheek, and the duo walked out of the bathroom and out of the bar. Before they stepped back into the sunlight, Max's eyes met with a young brown-haired boy who was sitting in a lonely corner of the room, coloring. He looked upward at Max, and Zenigata jerked away a little in automatic response. He looked so dejected by the world Max couldn't help but feel moved by him. He turned his attention back to his partner, who led him out of the dark and into the sunlit Louisiana streets.

"You ever think about adopting?" asked Max.

"Um… We did that, Zenigata… We're doing that again…" Leo said with a raised eyebrow. He stopped and gave Max a questioningly glance. "What are you getting at?"

"I just saw something that really depressed me," Max shrugged and continued down the street with Leo, his hands in his pocket and one arm linked with Lupin's.

Fuji, meanwhile, sat from the sidelines, and took this opportunity to enter the club. The child Max had shared the frigid stare with was also of great interest to her. She took it upon herself to buy two Sundaes, and muttered a curse to herself and how much she'd eaten today. She walked over to the table where the boy sat and set down the ice cream in front of him. She sat in a chair opposite of him, and took out a bottle for Namiko. Fuji, as light and happy as she was, was almost brought to crying as she saw how quickly the boy ate. She then pushed her ice cream in front of him and smiled, "You…. You can have mine, too…"

His face fell a little; he knew that his mother had told him to never except things from strangers, but it was the first time he had eaten since yesterday. He looked upward at him and nodded, "Thanks…"

"Wow, you finally spoke," Fuji smirked and removed the menu. "You want anything else, Kiddo? I'll foot the bill…"

"Will you get something for my mom?" asked the boy hopefully.

Fuji smiled, "Whatever you want… Just think of me as your genie…"

"Thanks a million for this…" said the boy quietly. "How do you know me?"

"My brother was friends with your mom before you were even born… What's you name, kid?"

"Jared."

"Jared… That's nice…" Fuji nodded.

"What's your name?" asked Jared, looking up above the menu at Fuji.

"Eh… Fujiko, but I like Fuji…" replied Fuji.

"That's a sorta weird name…"

"Well I'm a sorta weird person," she gave a warm smile at this.

"Is that your kid?"

"Nah… I can't really have kids…. This is my, eh, niece, I guess you could call her… Her name's Namiko," replied Fuji with a little bit of sadness in her voice. Out of all of the people, an eight year old was the only one who knew her inability for children. Not even her parents had been informed of this.

"Jared, who's that?" asked Arlene as she walked over to Jared in a rush.

"Fuji Lupin, Ma'am… You know my brother," replied Fuji with a wide smile as she rose and shook the now pallor Arlene's hand.

"I dealt with him already… You want to chew me out, too?" asked Arlene in a hiss, "If you're gonna do it, at least do it away from my kid…"

"Mom, wait—She's really nice!" said Jared quietly.

"Eastern European father, neh?" Fuji looked at Arlene sideways, "Ya know, I've got kind of slanted eyes like his, too. Maybe I should ask my mom if she was hanging out with any Moldavians…. Would you like something to eat?"

"I don't need your money, I don't need your charity and I don't need the Lupin family butting into all of my affairs. I've had enough trouble with Lupin the Third and Fujiko Lupin," said Arlene as she took her son roughly by the arm. "C'mon, Jared… We're leaving…"

"Mom, stop it—She's nice!" snapped Jared, pulling out of his mother's grasp, "Why do you always run away from people?"

"Now isn't the time to fight, Jared… Please, let's just go…" Arlene said hurriedly. "Let's head back to our hotel."

"If you mean by hotel, car, there's a ticket on it. A ticket I'll cover if you just hear me out," said Fuji firmly.

Arlene gave a long pause, "What do you want from me, exactly?"

"Just to talk. Can we go to a park?" asked Fuji.

Arlene sighed and nodded, "Yeah… Fine… C'mon, Jared, get your coloring book…"

Later, the park:

"So you don't even know?" asked Fuji, gaping in obvious surprise. "How many other Asian guys could you have possibly slept with in that week?"

"If you call me a whore I hope you get struck down by lightning, Miss Lupin," said Arlene as she watched Jared play with numerous other children on a playground.

"Listen, I don't care if he's my nephew or not, but do you really think he deserves this? I mean, you're living out of a car! Does this kid even get a real education? I hated my tutors, too, but I also came from enough money and I could afford to be a screw up! I've got my parents to support me!"

"We all can't be so lucky," Arlene sighed. "I'm doing what I love and Jared's fully supportive of me…"

"Are you sure? How do you know he's just not scared to tell you the truth?" asked Fuji as she looked at the sad little boy, "That kid looked like he hadn't eaten in days when I fed him… Helen Keller could've looked at this kid would've known off the bat that he's malnourished!"

Arlene looked downward and bit her lit, "Listen, it's not easy seeing him go hungry… It really, really isn't… But I'm doing my best…"

"No you're not. Putting your pride on the shelf and asking for help every once in a while would be your best. Leo may hate you, but he's got a soft spot for kids; he'll help anyone who asks…. Hell, it's a rare day when we get along but he still helps me to this day!... Come back to my hotel room, you guys can stay there for the night. I'll help get you back on your feet."

"Okay," Arlene nodded. "Thank you so much…"

"Please don't mention it…" Fuji rolled her eyes in response. What in the world was up with her, anyway?

The next morning, the hotel room:

Fuji looked down at the hand written note and stared, and stared, and stared….

And stared…

She couldn't believe it. Namiko wriggled in her arms a little, and Fuji sighed and went to fetch the girl a bottle. The handwritten note lay upon Arlene's cold pillow, and the still-sleeping Jared lied next to it. Fuji passed by her purse and jewelry box as she walked into the small kitchen. Both had been emptied of any and all valuables and thrown upon the floor. Arlene had even stolen one of her guns. Luckily she still had the Walther which she kept beneath her pillow.

"Well, here's to swallowing my pride, Nami," sighed Fuji as she picked up the phone and dialed. "Hello, Heiji-chan? It's a long story…. Could you wire me over some money? I was robbed…"

Another Part of New Orleans:

"What's wrong, Leo?" asked Max as he looked at Lupin's suddenly stern expression.

"I just had a bad premonition… I hope Fuji's okay…" said Leo quietly. He rolled over in the bed and looked at the alarm clock. "Jeeze, I can't believe it's almost eleven! I haven't gotten this much sleep in months!"

"I know what you mean," Max stretched and placed an arm over Leo's chest. "The weather's too bad to go outside today."

"There isn't a cloud in the sky, Zenigata!"

"I know… I despise sunlight…"

"Yeah… You're a much bigger fan of indoor activities," Leo chuckled.

"Damn straight!" Max replied, "Well, not exactly, but, heh, I'm happy…"

"If you follow up happy with 'gay' I'm gonna smack you," Leo said firmly.

"Gay, almost…"

"I warned you!" Leo picked up the pillow and gave Max a good _whack!_ with it, and Zenigata fell back, laughing at this.

Max went to return this, but the phone rang, and he gave a heavy sigh. "If it's anyone who's not my parents I'm going to chew them out… Hello? Yeah? Wow… Yeah, okay, I'll tell him… Bye," Max hung up the phone and turned to Leo, "That was Heiji—He says your sister got robbed last night."

"She what?" Leo gaped, "You're kidding…"

"Nope. He just wanted you to know that she's okay, though…"

"Well, that'll be something to bring up for the Christmas party."

"Yeah, yeah…. Merry Christmas… Where were we? Oh, yeah, I was about ready to kick your ass…"

"You wish!" Leo laughed.

California, later that evening:

"So you posed as Fuji, let her take your baby, and now Fuji's in Louisiana?" Ryo repeated as she and the rest of the remaining Lupin gang sat in the hotel room.

"Yes…" Odori nodded.

"Wait," Heiji righted himself and blinked a few times. "Then does that mean that we—"

"Unfortunately…"

"Oh, God!" Heiji shrieked, and ran into the bathroom. Toshiro and Ally turned to one another, paused, and then broke out into laughter in unison.

"It's not funny!" Odori growled, pounding upon the table. Both immediately halted their laughing and gulped as they stared at Odori, more than a little frightened.

"How'd she talk you into letting her take Namiko, anyway?" asked Yukiko.

"Fuji swayed me, but I won't give you the details as to what she told me… Besides, she promised me whatever I wanted…"

"What'd you ask for?" Toshiro inquired.

Odori looked up tiredly, "That she babysit whenever I wanted for a month…"

"That's a pretty good deal," Toshiro nodded.

"What? Are you crazy? I wouldn't trust Fuji with my fedora, let alone the life of my baby!" snapped Yukiko.

"What, you having one, Yukiko?" asked Toshiro with a smirk.

"This isn't a witch hunt! Fuji's out there somewhere with your kid!" Yukiko added with anger in Odori's direction. Ryo blinked once in surprise as she realized Yukiko had totally avoided the subject at hand and instead opted for yelling at Odori. Ryo was suspicious…

A California road:

"So… My mom's on vacation and she left me with a stranger?" asked Jared suspiciously, "Did you kidnap me?"

"What? No!" snapped Fuji, "Eh… No offense, but I'm not a big fan of kids…"

"Why not?"

"They get in the way of a lot of my fun…" Fuji replied uneasily.

"What kind of fun do you like?"

"Erm… Why don't you turn on the radio?"

"Okay," Jared leaned forward and turned on the station to a classical channel.

"You don't like rock music?"

"I hate it."

"But it's what your mom plays…"

"I know," Jared answered quickly. Fuji gave a small sigh as she changed lanes; perhaps there had been only one Asian guy after all.

"You want to grab something to eat?" asked Fuji. "Oh, hold on… News… I want to listen to it…"

"In other news, another charge was added on to Fujiko Lupin, Lupin the Fourth's, already large list, this charge kidnapping. It was filed this morning in a Louisiana police station by the boy, Jared Garland's, mother, Arlene Garland…"

"Kidnapping?" Fuji shrieked and nearly rammed into a vehicle on the shoulder of the road, "That bitch set me up! She friggin' used me!"

Meanwhile, in Louisiana, Max Zenigata and Leo Lupin were on the first flight to California, having also heard the news earlier in the morning. Leo waited anxiously and practically ran onto the plane as they began boarding.

"The flight's about four hours, so calm down," said Max quietly, patting Leo on the hand.

"I knew Fuji was never fond of Arlene, but I didn't know she'd go as far as kidnapping! Damn it, Fuji!" snapped Leo to himself. Max looked at his partner worriedly and took hold of his hand.

"I'll buy you a drink if you want… I'm just as mad as you…"

"That'd be terrific…" Leo muttered.

Fuji arrived in the hotel room late in the evening, doing her best to hide Jared from the others, who, unbeknown to her, already knew of the situation. They were all waiting for her when she arrived, and Fuji passed Namiko to a glaring Odori as she looked about the room nervously.

"You know, Fuji, believe it or not, I had a small amount of respect for you at one point… Guess that's been shot…" muttered Yukiko as she turned away from Lupin the Fourth.

"Guys, you don't understand!" Fuji yelped, "I, I was set up! Come on, somebody? Ryo-san? Heiji-chan?"

"You lied to us about where you friggin' were, Fuji, why wouldn't you be lying about this?" Ryo asked angrily.

"Hey, wait, don't!" Jared called from his spot behind Fuji, "My mom left!"

"I'm tracking down this kid's dad, now…" sighed Fuji, "I was convinced it was Leo, but I'm not so sure… Even his mom's not sure… There's a businessman in Kyoto who also might be his dad…."

"Wait, I'm part Japanese?" Jared asked, looking up at Fuji in awe.

"I don't like the sound of it… How do we know he ain't working with his mom, eh?" asked Yukiko as she sat down on a couch in the living room.

"Hey, my dad had faith in you when you came to him on a hotel doorstep—I think it's time you return the favor," Fuji snapped. Yukiko gave a look of startled surprise, and this apparently shut the gunwoman up, "Now Jared's gonna be staying with us for a little while… The blood tests are coming back tomorrow… We'll know for sure then. Until then everybody treats him with respect or I make sure your respective parents are told that you were picking on a child."

"Come on, kid, you can bunk with me tonight," Ally took Jared's suitcase and led him into the room he shared with Heiji, making the hacker do a double take as he martial arts expert passed.

"What the hell about me?" asked Heiji, "I'm not sharing the room I know Yukiko and Toshiro do it in—I'm sorry, that's just twisted."

"You'll figure somethin' out," Ally responded. "Jared, you like movies?" Ally inquired of the young boy before closing his door.

"I better hit the sack, too… I'm getting tired," Yukiko stretched and yawned.

"I'll follow," Toshiro added, and turned to his brother before exiting, "You may be right about us sharing a room, but that's about all that's been going on in there…"

"I'm so close to letting you spend the night with the birds…" said Yukiko from her room.

"Dori, you want me to help you lay Nami down?" asked Ryo.

"Sounds terrific," Odori kissed her baby girl on the forehead and exited the living room, leaving Heiji and Fuji together.

Fuji smiled and waved, "Hi, roomie!"

"Why, God, why?" Heiji asked himself.

"Come on, my little Fujicakes continuation…" Fuji beckoned and led him into their room. Heiji tossed her his wallet after she had set down her suitcases, "What's this?"

"My license that says I know how to use a tazer, so watch it," Heiji replied as he took back his wallet. He held out his hand after placing it in his back pocket, and Fuji sighed and handed him back the money she had taken.

"Good," Heiji took a pillow and blanket from the bed and walked over to the couch. "Goodnight."

"Do you have fun watching me suffer?"

"In a word, yes…"

"Why in the hell are you still giving me such a hard time?" Fuji snapped as she dropped to the ground next to the couch where Heiji slept.

"Because you're immature and you can't commit to anything, and when I asked you out you turned me down. And it wasn't because of your dangerous lifestyle—It was because you didn't want a damn nerd for a boyfriend!"

"Listen, boyfriend's a scary word, okay?" Fuji said with a nervous chuckle, "Almost as scary as marriage, or Disneyland… Okay, I'll admit it… I'm a little vain…"

"A little?"

"Okay, so I'm as shallow as a hillbilly gene pool!" Fuji shouted, "You happy? What is it you want, anyway, a sorry? God, I swear if someone's mean to you once you hold it against them until they're dead!"

"I do not!"

"You're still mad at Toshiro for not being there when your guys' dad had a heart attack! You ever think maybe Toshiro was a little too busy saving New York City? Superman probably didn't make it to all of his dad's appointments, either."

"Superman's dad is dead, but he has a—"

"Shutup shutup SHUTUP!" Fuji shrieked. "Playing _Dungeons and Dragons_, okay. The _Red Dwarf _marathon, mildly tolerable, although to this day I don't know what the hell they're saying. Whoever thought of a British sci-fi comedy in the first place is the devil. Kicking your ass in _Streetfighter_—"

"Because you mash the buttons."

"—Enjoyable. But listening to the Superman speech again is something I refuse to be subjected to! I could talk your head off about crap, too, stuff you wouldn't want to friggin' hear!"

"Such as?"

"…I can quote entire scenes from _Legally Blonde_."

"…You win."

"Now we're totally off the subject and I'm more pissed off than I was before," Fuji heaved a sigh and rested her head back on the couch seat. Her eyes fluttered opened as she felt a presence, and looked forward to see Heiji's face down with hers. Ishikawa placed one had on her shoulder and kissed her, much to the surprise of Fuji Lupin. Then Fuji, with a strength Heiji hadn't even known existed in the raven-haired girl, pulled Heiji off of the couch and sat him down next to her.

"Wow, you're like the friggin' She Hulk!" Heiji chuckled.

"One more nerd reference tonight and I toss you out the window, and I'm tired and stressed enough to do it," Fuji said with a more than serious expression.

"Eh, yes, Ma'am…" a worried Heiji answered.

"Good… Hee, I kinda like it when you call me Ma'am!" Fuji admitted with a chuckle.

Early the next morning:

"Okay, time for me to get to work…" Ally muttered as he tied on his apron, which read _King of the Kitchen, _and went to work in their small kitchen space. He took out a eighteen eggs and whistled as he cracked each one and then mixed them in a large bowl. If there was one thing Jigen always made sure he had, it was his cooking utensils. That and his sniper rifle.

He then went to work on frying bacon which he had purchased the night before, and tossed two packages onto a skillet and turned to another project.

"What're you doing? Boys don't cook…" said Jared as he stood in the doorway.

"Hey, part of the reason my fiancée loves me so much is because I can make a homemade meal… Although usually I get stuck with condensed milk and eggs from a paper carton," Ally muttered.

"You've got a girlfriend?"

"Yep, and she's probably cuter than any ones you've had," Ally added joking as he concentrated on scrambling the eggs he had placed on a burner.

"Probably," Jared admitted as he watched Ally scuttle about. "But you're a lot older than me…"

"Not that much!" Ally responded with a laugh.

"How old are you? Twenty eight, twenty nine?"

"Not even close," Ally responded, blinking a few times at this. "M-My dad usually looked a lot older than he was, too! Lucky me, huh?"

"Well, you know your dad, right?"

"Yeah, good point," Ally nodded as he opened the small fridge and pulled out some containers of fruit. "The old man's a crazy bastard, but he never smacked me around, even when I deserved it…"

"That's got to be pretty cool…."

"Your mom ever tell you anything about your old man?" asked Ally as he took a large knife and began to chop the fruit with the ease of an expert.

"Woah… You're good with knives!" Jared gasped with awe.

"You're one of many who think the same exact thing… But, yeah, I take it your mom never told you about your dad?"

"Fuji's saying that it could be this guy in a place called coat-o, or whatever… That or her brother…"

"Ari?" Ally said to himself, and chopped in silence a little while, in obvious deep thought. He brushed the cantaloupe he had cut into a large bowl, all while retaining this silence.

"Um… Is something wrong? Did you know her brother or something?" asked Jared worriedly.

"Yeah, you could say that…" Ally muttered, handing Jared a plate of food as he finished the eggs and fruit, "You'll have to wait on the bacon… It takes a while…"

"That's okay," Jared nodded gratefully and walked over to the television, where he resigned himself to watching cartoons that early morning.

"Heh, well at least Toshiro'll have justification for watching _Animainiacs _reruns, now…" Ally said to himself with a chuckle.

Jared looked up from his plate as he watched Odori open the door to her room and walk out, Namiko in one arm. The young boy who knew little Japanese and the young woman who knew little English made eye contact briefly, and then Odori continued her walk to the kitchen.

"_Arry, soba o ichi-ninmae onegai shimasu_," said Odori to Ally, holding up an empty noodle bowl.

"You know, Dori, if I didn't like you so much cooking special Japanese foods for you would be a royal pain in my ass…" said Ally as he retrieved a small pot of buckwheat noodles from the stove and poured them into her bowl. He then passed her a set of chopsticks and a bottle after this, and Odori nodded gratefully and walked back into her room.

Jared, meanwhile, never took his eyes off of the lanky Ally. He had heard Odori's request to the chef, and had heard what she had called him. Ari….

He blinked once more in surprise as he came under the assumption that he was staring at his father.

A California hotel:

Leo looked toward Max with worry as he watched Zenigata polish his gun, and then stared back down at the script which he had hidden in one of his language books. He had not told Max this, but he had agreed to do another season of _Mankii-chan _for a television studio, considering the huge success it had been. There was even works of a _Hello Kitty _crossover. With this popularity, he mused, he might become the next Yasuo Yamada.

The royalties he received for being the unique voice for one of the most popular characters since _Doraemon_ (Japanese robot cat; as popular as Mickey Mouse in the U.S.) were astounding, and if Max had been in a better mood he probably would've been overjoyed. Max was out for blood, though. Fuji had taken away his alone time with his new husband, and Zenigata was still reeling from it.

Leo had since calmed down from the kidnapping charges when he read over Arlene's statement and realized exactly how full of holes and how un-Fuji like it was, and now it was Max's turn to be pissed off.

"What are you looking at?" asked Max casually as he loaded the chambers of his handgun.

"Er, nothing," Leo closed his book, looked upward at Max and smiled. "How're you doing?"

"I'm gonna kill her next time I see her…" Max added calmly.

"Max, I'm sure there's a good reason!" Leo sighed. "We both agreed that it was totally out of Fuji's character!"

"Good reason for me ending that whore's life? Damn skippy," replied Max as he placed his gun in his holster and crossed one leg over the other. "Two weeks—I practically had to_ do_ the boss to get that off! We're still in hot water with him for everything we've screwed up in the past, and asking for two weeks off takes a lot of guts. He's a homophobic Lupin hater, and I have the ever increasing suspicion that our parents are behind it!"

Leo rested his chin on his hand, "So this is about your pride again?"

"That's part of it!"

"Zenigata, you've got to face it. We're the inspectors. We less competent than eighty percent of the politicians I've had to jackass around France over the years."

"We're damn good, it's just that Lupin's just as good!"

"Now, you see, if we were equal, things would always end in a stalemate; not with us looking like the fools…"

"So you're saying she's better?"

"Both of us are good, but we play on different fields… Unfortunately her field's on a mountain, and we're lower than the Dead Sea. Some things just have to be expected."

"I thought I was the pessimist!"

"You rub off on me… You know our blood pressures combined makes a historical year? I think it's when Columbus discovered America…"

"Ha ha… You get that one out of a joke book?" asked Max.

Leo was about to retort smartly when the phone rang and both lunged for it, Max tumbling to the ground and muttering 'ow' and Leo throwing down his book and picking up the phone. As Max rose, he saw the script Leo had been reading over inches from his face. He glanced over it as Leo busied himself on the telephone. He confronted Leo with this after LeBlanc had hung up.

"We've got a tip on Lupin," said Leo. "Eh, what are you looking over? A case file?"

"No… A script…" Max replied in a mumble while he continued to read over it. He looked above the booklet at Leo and set it aside, "Why in the hell didn't you tell me you were going to go more of it?"

"It's embarrassing! How would you like to be known as the male version of Hello Kitty? I still told my dad, but I'm pretty convinced that this is what'll do him in."

"You should've told me, still," said Max seriously.

"Could we talk about this later? They found Fuji…" sighed Leo taking the script from Max's hands and setting in aside.

"We should've talked about this a lot earlier…" Max muttered as he picked up his badge and walked out the door after Leo.

Fuji's Hangout:

"It's ten in the morning… We really should be getting out there before anyone gets suspicious…" Heiji muttered.

"They can just deal… I'm too comfy," Fuji replied with a yawn as she briefly opened her eyes to look back at Ishikawa. "If they start asking, go out there and tell them I'm on some kind of important, mission, stealy thingy…" she added, rolling over and putting her blanket over her head.

Heiji laughed and pulled the blanket down, and kissed her, "I love you," he said with a smile.

Fuji's face became strange, suddenly, and she looked away as she felt the pang of horror which those words made her feel. She could feel Heiji looking back downward at her, waiting for her to return this. She had to think quickly…

She suddenly sat up and smiled widely, "Maybe breakfast would be a good idea, afterall!"

"Eh, yeah…" Heiji sighed with some disappointment in his voice.

"I call dibs on the bathroom, first," Fuji kissed him on the cheek and walked into the bathroom, picking up her clothes for the day along the way. She closed the bathroom door behind her, and soon afterward banged her head upon the porcelain wall a few times, cursing her entrapment and her own stupidity.

Meanwhile, outside, Yukiko, Toshiro and Ryo watched in amusement as they watched Odori upon the couch, looking downward at the flashcards Jared was holding. These were the same flashcards Fuji had given Odori long ago to study, but Ishikawa had put off in order to practice.

"Anoh, anoh…" Odori looked downward at the picture on the flashcard and drew a blank. What the hell was it?

"Cat!" Yukiko called. Toshiro tried to stifle a laugh and Ryo nudged her sister in the ribs. Yukiko grew a little tense at this poking, and scooted away from Ryo ever so slightly. Ryo raised an eyebrow, and then turned her attention back to Jared and Odori.

"This is a dog," said Jared. "Doggg…."

"Dog," Odori said in her thick Japanese accept. "Dog…"

"Yup! You got it!" Jared smiled happily. "Good job, Odori!"

"Thank you," Odori replied in her broken accent as she bounced Namiko on her knee.

"Hey, anyone want seconds!" Ally called from the kitchen.

"We're good, Ally!" replied Toshiro.

"Anyone except Toshiro, whose opinion never counted in the beginning, want seconds?" Ally repeated.

"We're good!" Ryo shouted.

"Good, then… Jeeze that kitchen gets hot after a while… I guess Fuji and Heiji'll have to heat theirs in the microwave," said Ally as he removed his apron and seated himself in the living room with the others.

"What in the hell are those two up to, anyway?" asked Yukiko, looking at their door, "Do I even want to know?"

"Probably not," Toshiro and Ryo replied in unison.

"You know, you don't look like Fuji…." Jared said to Ally as he flipped another card.

"Um… Thank you?" Ally replied.

"You don't look like me either; maybe my dad's the other guy, then…"

'Dad' was one word Odori registered, and she, along with the rest of the Lupin gang in the room, looked to Jigen and stared.

"Wha—What?" Ally yelped and flushed, "I am definitely not a dad—Trust me!"

"Well, it's not unheard of, Ally," Toshiro shrugged. "A lot of pregnancies are unplanned, anyway! Look at me—I come from a long line of them!"

"No, you don't understand—I ain't related to this kid!" said Ally, his reddening increasing.

"Ally? Your name's Ally? I thought it was Ari…" said Jared in a confused mumble.

"Ari's your dad?" Ryo yelped. She placed a hand over her mouth and her eyes opened wide. She rose, excused herself, and went to go get a smoke on the balcony of the hotel. She quickly ran back in, though, with a look of surprise on her face.

"The cops are here!" she shouted.

"What?" Yukiko yelped, and the Lupin gang scrambled to get their things together. Ryo pounded on Fuji's a door a few times and explained the situation in a shout, and soon Fuji and Heiji were also out in the hotel room. Fuji looked downward, and saw Max and Leo staring back up at them, the SWAT team around them and Max holding a megaphone and appearing more angered than usual.

"Lupin, come out there now!" Max shouted, "You're surrounded…"

"Not quite, Zenigata," Fuji smirked, picked up her backpack and ran to Odori, "Cut a hole through the ceiling—That oughta get us out!"

"Right," Odori stood back, and with one swoop of Zantetsu she had carved a good sized hole into the ceiling. She was the first one lifted up, along with Namiko, and then the others soon followed, Fuji waiting until everyone had gone up to have Heiji pull her up. The German tourists watched in awe as the Lupin gang placed their disguises over their regular clothes, and one man finally approached Fuji with a piece of paper and a pen.

"My son love you!" said the man cheerily, "You sign?"

Fuji took the pen, jotted down her signature quickly and kissed it, leaving a lipstick mark, "Tell him hello from Japan," she smirked as she put on her mask and then the gang went their separate ways, undetected by Interpol, who was too busy trying to disable the fake bomb Heiji had set up before they had left. They were more than a little perturbed when it spat out confetti and began to play a classical tune from Beethoven.

"That was so cool!" Jared said to Fuji as they climbed into the Romeo, Jared sitting upon the female thief's lap.

"It ain't over yet—Ryo-san, you ready?" asked Fuji, turning to her partner in crime.

"I've been wanting to test out the new braking system," Ryo turned the keys on the ignition, and then zoomed out, nearly knocking down Leo and Max, who had gone down to parking garage in case the Lupin gang had gotten to the cars. Just as they began to rise from the ground they had been knocked down onto, Toshiro zoomed past. Max let out a yell, and Leo quickly grabbed him and rolled out of the way.

"That… Is it… I'm gonna kill them…" Max grumbled.

"Hey, could you get off? Max, you're heavy!" Leo grumbled.

The Romeo suddenly backed into the garage, and Fuji leaned down and smiled at the two, "I _knew_ it! Max_ is_ on top!"

"You made me drive back here for that?" Ryo shrieked.

"You—" Max tossed a pair of handcuffs, which landed on the rearview of the Romeo. Fuji chuckled and looked at the handcuffs.

"Blondie, you're really losing your touch," Fuji chuckled as Ryo sped off once again, still angered at her friend.

"She's right, Max… You usually catch her…" said Leo with a little worry as he sat up on the concrete of the parking garage.

"Heh, those came with something special…" said Max with an evil smirk.

Leo raised an eyebrow and looked worriedly at his partner, "Um… Special like how?"

"You'll see…." Max replied, keeping the crazed expression.

"….I think you need another vacation…"

On the road:

"What… What the hell?" Ryo muttered as the car jerked to a halt. She stopped on the shoulder of the road, and went to the front to check. What Max had meant by something special was a small bug he had thrown into the car through one of its louvers on the hood, and it had made the battery freeze up and die, essentially. What Ryo didn't know, however, was that the battery also delivered at electrical shock if it were touched while it had the bug on it. She learned this, however, when she tried to made the fateful mistake of removing the bug, and a large buzz was heard from the front of the car.

"….I smell barbeque…" said Fuji, sniffing about.

Ryo slammed down the hood, and leaned on the car a few moments, a buzzing noise in her ears and her hair a mess from the current which had passed through her body. The metal bracelets she wore had only heightened the shock. She growled and kicked the car several times. Fuji attempted not to chuckle.

"Don't you dare say anything---Say something and I'll hurt you," said Ryo darkly.

Fuji couldn't help it, though, "Wow, all of that working on the car must've totally zapped all of the energy out of you…"

"Gaaah!" Ryo lunged, and the others looked on tiredly as the two went at it, Jared ducking the punches and pushing.

"I think Ryo's mad," Toshiro said as he and Yukiko continued to watch the fight from a distance.


	20. Birthday

DISCLAIMER: It's been 731 days and I'm still no closer to owning Lupin…. Damn…

Happy, happy, happy, anniversary…

Heh, no, that's not the song I'm listening to right now (I'm actually listening to the _Countries of the World_ from_ Animaniacs_… Heh… Education during the summer… I'm surprised my brain hasn't rebelled yet). But it is indeed my second anniversary! Yay, two years of writing and…. Well, I ain't any richer for it, monetary wise, but I sure as heck've gotten a lot out of this in other respects. New friends, experience, confidence… Etc., etc….. You're just here for the chapter… Well, thanks to everyone, and here's wishing for many more years when I can get as much enjoyment out of writing as I have in these past few years.

Fun Fact of Boredom: Jared's name was selected by a long time friend and reader, Yuki, when I was stuck for a name. Thanks again, Yuki!

Chapter Twenty: Birthday

Tokyo, Japan:

"I can't believe we let them get away again…" Leo muttered as he collapsed upon the bed in his and Max's motel room. "Jeeze, is it just me or do our hotel rooms get crappier and crappier?"

"Heh, it reflects their love for us at ICPO," replied Max as he seated himself in the chair opposite the bed and removed his tie and jacket. "How in the hell they even managed to jumpstart that car after that bug killed it is beyond me…."

"Knowing Ryoko she packs jumper cables and they might've used Toshiro's battery to jump it to life…"

"How would they manage to get that bug off, though?"

"With something that wasn't a good electric conductor, like rubber…"

"You know, I used to wonder what kind of freaks watched the Discovery channel…"

"Ha ha ha, Zenigata…" Leo rolled his eyes and then rubbed his face with his hands; for some reason he was more than a little exhausted.

"Would your sister know how to figure that out, though?"

"Sure. Fuji's IQ is higher than mine!"

"….Say what…?"

"She's a clinical genius… She's got an IQ in like the mid-160's…"

"Anything over 130's genius… You mean to tell me…"

"Yup. My sister, the one who gets surprised when ice cream melts in the sun, has had you fooled all along, Chaim."

"My head's starting to hurt at the possibility that Fuji's smarter than I am…"

"It's not a possibility; it's for real…."

"There's just no way I can believe that," Max said with a shake of the head.

A Hotel in Osaka:

"Go figure we're returning this kid in the exact same place where you met Jigen, Yukiko!" said Toshiro with a small laugh as he looked toward the television set, where Heiji, Fuji and Jared were sitting on the floor, watching a broadcast of _Jeopardy!_ Via an illegal satellite Heiji had hooked up to the outside of the hotel window.

"I'll take potpourri," said the contestant in the television.

"You know, as much as they have this category, not a single question about dried flowers!" said Fuji with disappointment.

The host read aloud this question while Heiji stared worriedly at Fuji, "Name Nabakov's most controversial novel, which was later turned into a film by director Stanley Kubrick….."

"Damn, eh…. _Spartacus_?" Heiji replied, and looked to Jared, who simply shrugged.

"The closest I get to classic lit is _Superman_ back issues," Jared shrugged.

_'It's** Lolita**,' _Fuji thought as the stared at the screen.

"Fuji? Any guesses?" Heiji asked, looking to his partner.

"Ummmm….. Nabakov? Didn't he write those _Harry Potter _books?" Fuji chuckled lightly.

"Oi…." Heiji placed a hand on his head and shook it. He loved Fuji, he had been serious about that, but Lupin still proved to be a headache at times. "I'm gonna go get some ice cream!" she chuckled and rose from the floor, walking to the kitchen and opening the fridge.

"…You ever wonder if you made a mistake, Jared?" Heiji inquired as he looked back to Fuji.

"Um…. Like on a test?"

"Eh, not quite," Heiji sighed and smiled at the small boy. "Nevermind… You don't need to be worrying about that stuff yet…"

"What stuff is that?" Jared inquired.

"Eh…. Girlfriend crap," Heiji smirked and quickly brushed this off, turning his attention back to the television.

"You really are afraid to be yourself in front of anybody anymore, aren't you?" Fuji heard in a voice which surprised her and caused her to hit her head on the fridge. Fuji grumbled as she rose rubbing her sore skull, an icepop still in its wrapper dangling from her teeth. Ryo took the Popsicle, undid the wrapping and then began to eat while leaning against the counter of the kitchen.

"What are you talking about?... Damn it, that was the last grape one!" Fuji mumbled sadly. "You're so cruel, Ryo-san…"

"Who likes grape, anyway?" Ryo said as she looked down at the purple frozen treat.

"Well, you always had a thing for anything in purple," Fuji gave a wide innocent smile, and Ryo shot her a glare in return.

"I'm not stupid… I know what you and Heiji did a few nights ago… Mainly each other…." Ryo said with the usual sternness in her voice. "A relationship on lies is never a good one, Fujiko."

"You get that out of that Shakespeare you're always reading?" asked Fuji with a sly smirk.

"No… Just some conventional Jigen wisdom," Ryo answered, licking the Popsicle and then continuing. "He's in love with Lupin the Fourth, not Fuji…"

Fuji bit her lip and then opened the fridge once more.

"Fujiko, are you even listening to me?"

"You know, you're so great at giving advice, but do you ever think of taking any of your own wisdom?" Fuji asked, never taking her eyes off of the floor. She closed the fridge door and then exited into her bedroom. She was on edge with good reason, even though Ryo was unaware of the circumstances, which was unusual. Usually the silent Ryo was also the all-knowing one in the matter pertaining to the Lupin gang. Fuji didn't want Ryo to know this, though… Not until she was positive of the results herself.

Fuji locked her bedroom door and then removed a box from beneath her bed. One-hundred percent accuracy… She had paid good money to find out the truth… Whether the doctors had been wrong all along… As much as she knew it was the end of her freedom if this was so, most of her wanted this to be so.

"Being Lupin the Fourth's great, but I'd like to know I can be more than that…." she said to herself as she opened the package and walked into the bathroom. She emerged from the same bathroom a minute later, and she set her watch.

Unbeknownst to her, or the rest of the group, however, Yukiko Jigen had also purchased a similar test. Currently Yukiko sat staring at the clock in front of her, the second hand ticking and ticking away.

"I wonder if third time's a charm…" she wondered aloud as she looked at the white clock from beneath her fedora and let her foot bounce up and down nervously.

After two minutes passed, Fuji was pacing in the room, looking down at the clock and pulling her hair back. She looked out the window and saw a young mother walking down the street with a little child. Fuji gave way to a small smile, "She seems to love him… Lucky little child…" she turned away from the window, and turned on the television, after a moment of aimlessly flipping through the channels, she fell down on the bed and buried her face in the pillow.

"What am I going to tell my parents if it comes back positive?" Yukiko asked herself as she sat up and removed her fedora, "What in the hell will I tell Toshiro? Well, knowing that big idiot, he'll probably be thrilled…. What in the hell about me, though? I mean, it's my friggin' body… One more minute…"

"One more minute," Fuji said to herself as she looked at her watch. She looked out of her room window and saw a church. "Well, the woman and the kid, and now a church… Maybe this is just a series of signs… Hm, what would I call it, though? Ari's got Arsène the fifth, already…" Her watch sounded, and she jumped up and walked into the bathroom.

The clock ticked off showing five minutes, and Yukiko walked into the bathroom and scanned over the results. She sat down upon the floor and placed a hand over her eyes, "Oh, son of a…. Friggin' hell!"

Fuji walked into her bathroom and looked downward at the results, and matched them with the box. She gulped dryly and nodded, "Guess not…" she said to herself, and tossed the box into the garbage. She gave a heavy sigh and closed the door behind her, "Well, it's all fate, anyway… Besides, what kind of mom would I have been?... I wish I could've at least had a clue…."

Yukiko and Fuji walked out of their rooms and made eye contact, and both wore similar expressions, but for different reasons. Yukiko walked into the living room and tugged onto Toshiro's kimono sleeve, and muttered something to him. Ishikawa gave a stunned look at his fiancée, and smiled and embraced her. Fuji quickly turned away and grabbed her jacket.

"I'm going out…" Fuji said quietly.

"To where?" Heiji inquired.

"I don't know," and with that, Fuji Lupin closed the door to the hotel.

Later that night, a nightclub:

"You look down… Want me to buy you drink?" Fuji swiveled her chair to a side, and looked at the Asian businessman.

She gave a half-assed smile and nodded, "Sure. Pull up a chair, Buddy."

"Thanks!" he smiled and seated himself next to her, and ordered a few drinks, "So what are you doing here so late?"

"Trying to drink off a stupid idea I had," replied Fuji as she took her drink and sipped it.

"Like what?" the man inquired.

"Nothing important. You?"

"My wife was getting on my nerves," he grumbled. "That bitch and her whining brat…"

"Whining brat, heh?" Fuji sipped her drink indifferently, "There are worse things, you know…."

"Tee hee, like what?" the man inquired. He turned to Fuji, and met with her fist. He went flying off of the bar chair on onto the floor.

"Like a broken nose!" Fuji shouted, tossing her drink upon him.

Later, a local jail:

"There's something so ironic, and somewhat anticlimactic about this…." Max sighed heavily as he and Leo looked past the cell bars and in at Fuji Lupin.

"We can never arrest you, and you get caught for a bar brawl?" Leo asked with a heavy sigh.

"Don't worry! I used a fake name!" Fuji said reassuringly.

"Then they'll trace your fingerprints back to your records!" snapped Max.

"Fake fingerprints," Fuji added. "Never leave home without 'um!"

"Damn it!" Max growled, gripping onto the bars. "It's bad enough you had to kidnap a kid! Leo had to pay for your bail, you ingrate!"

"I'm grateful, Ari, really," said Fuji, looking upward at her brother. "He knows I'll pay him back… Jeeze, Zenigata, you're more tense than unusual. Lupin making you sleep on the couch or something?"

"That's none of your business!" Max shouted, and Leo gave a worried look. Fuji was right; Zenigata had been more high strung than usual, and Leo wasn't sure if it was just the issue of the short honeymoon. Maybe he had been pressuring Max into too much, he thought with a frown.

"Come on…" Leo sighed as Fuji was let out of the small jail and taken in the back of their car, in handcuffs.

"This place is a sty!" Fuji grumbled, "I think I just sat on a fork! You guys are two of the sloppiest gay guys I've ever met!"

"Well, you're more welcome to clean it out if you want, Fuji," Leo sighed as he looked down at her hands, "Seeing that you've already busted out of your metallic prison…"

"Sounds good!" Fuji smiled warmly and began to adjust the back seat, "Ohhh! A receipt for a stroller! What kind is it?"

"You didn't tell me you bought one…" Max said, turning to Leo.

"I didn't think it was important," Leo shrugged.

"You bought anything else?" Max inquired.

"Well, a couple of things…. Listen, Max, it was just a stroller… You don't need to get all up in arms over something simple…"

"I'm not… Why do you always think I get so defensive?"

"Because you do! You blow up over the stupidest crap!" Leo shouted.

Fuji gave a nervous chuckle, "Um, do you guys want me to—"

"No! Stay there!" Leo and Max shouted in unison, and then turned back to once another.

"Okay," Fuji squeaked, and sat back in her seat, watching the argument continue to mount in front of her eyes.

"You sound just like your father when you bitch at me like that, Max!" snapped Leo.

"Don't you dare compare to him, Ari!" Max returned angrily.

"Don't call me Ari."

"Oh, so Ryoko can call you that, but the person who puts up with your B.S. isn't worthy?"

"Please don't start with that…." Leo moaned, "I've told her to stop, too."

"First I find you talking with an ex-girlfriend and now this…."

"Listen, it wasn't my fault! I thought Fuji ran in there!"

"Uh-oh," Fuji muttered beneath her breath. She gave a sigh of relief as Max passed over this detail and continued with his rant. She gave a tired look as she realized that she had no time for her problems with all of the bickering and everything else going on in her family.

Max, at one point, grew so angered he pulled the car over on the shoulder of a small road, got out of the car and slammed the door behind him, while Leo looked onward, stunned. He looked back to Fuji, who was busying herself reading through a magazine she had found in the back seat. Leo sighed, and also exited the car. He knew he'd probably lose Fuji, but he was more worried about losing Max. He found Zenigata sitting atop a round fence post, looking almost like a scarecrow in front of the temple he had stopped at.

"Max, what's going_ on_ with you?" Leo asked worriedly, "I know you're usually loud and everything, but even this is out of character for you!"

"I just…" Max placed his head in his hands and gave a heavy sigh, "I can't keep doing all of this…"

"What are you talking about? Do what? Max, tell me and I'll help you!" said Leo; he was growing more concerned with every tense moment that passed between them.

"Chasing Lupin, Dako, another baby, the friggin' pressure from ICPO, the fact that my parents are disappointed in me. I never even wanted kids! What the hell time does that leave for you and me, huh?"

"Well, I—"

"We're getting another kid in a few weeks, and, how are we going to raise a baby with our schedules, Arsène? I mean, honestly…."

"….What do you want to do, then?" asked Leo quietly.

Max hopped off of the fence and looked upward at Leo as he approached him. "You've got a good thing going with that voiceover gig, you make a bundle off of it and you work from home! You could live with the baby and Dako and be okay staying at home!"

"But what about you?" asked Leo as he took a step back from Zenigata.

Max sighed tiredly, "Well, I'll just keep my job at Interpol, I guess…"

"But that'd leave even less time for us."

"Not if there wasn't an 'us'," Max responded. He gulped hard and looked upward at Leo, "Listen, I love you more than I could probably ever show you. But I'm trying to do my best now by doing this. Dako needs a mom, too, and I remember you told me once that Ryoko loved kids. She's perfect for you. Besides, I… I look at you, and I know you're uncomfortable with the whole situation. You deserve a nice, young, happy girl who'll stay by you, cook for you, the whole nine yards…."

"Damn it, no!" Leo shouted, "You're not going to leave me again! Especially with two kids, too! I don't know how we're going to work things out, yet, but we always manage to think of something! Listen, I'm sorry that that happened with Cecilia, I wish I could take it back, I really do. But I mainly friggin' did that for the good of you! I don't want to know I put up with that sick twist of a bitch for a year and a half just so you could walk out on me! Trust me, I've tried women, and every one who wasn't my mother has disappointed me. You may have disappointed Natasha and Zenigata, Max, but you've never disappointed me."

"Heh, yeah, right…"

"I'm being serious!" Leo shouted. _'God please don't let it all end this way… What in the hell am I going to do if he walks out now?'_

Fuji sighed as she stood in the distance from the two, "Looks like it's time for me to play Dr. Phil…. Yo, Zenigata-sama! Lupin-sama!" she shouted to gain their attention, "What are you two shouting about now!"

"Fuji, not now," Leo said. He was already on the verge of another breakdown…. The last thing he needed was her butting in.

"It's none of your business," Max said to Fuji sternly.

"Oh, I heard it… I'm sure Amaya will love the fact that you're walking out on your kids for a job… Your dad did the same thing to her, and look how she ended up!" Fuji shrugged.

Max gave Fuji a glare but remained speechless, a little unsure as to how to answer that biting but true comment.

Fuji approached the two, put a hand on the back of either of their heads, and knocked them together.

"OW!" both inspectors moaned, rubbing their foreheads.

"What in the hell was the purpose of that?" asked Leo while he continued to rub his forehead.

"Two check and see if you two were brain-dead or not," said Fuji with a smile. "I guess not, from that response… Zenigata, you've gotta be crazy if you're going to leave right now… If you walk away, you'll be no better than your dad, at least in that sense. I know I'm a good catch, but I'm not worth leaving my brother over! And Dako's such a little sweetheart, but she'd probably hunt you down if you left Leo. No offense, but she's rougher with you, Max. Now I want you two to kiss and make up or I'll call up all of the major papers and give them pictures of me at your guys' wedding."

"…." Max blinked a few times in surprise, and then turned to Leo.

Leo sighed and smiled, "Listen, I know it's going to get hectic for a while, but we'll get it all under control. And Fuji's even agreed to cut down on the thieving for a little while—"

"I WHAT?" Fuji shrieked.

"That or those same papers see all of your chubby pictures…." Leo smirked.

"….You're a rat bastard," said Fuji with a glare.

"And that's why he loves me," Leo chuckled as he put his hands on Max's shoulders. "Now, what do you say? We give it another shot?"

"I… Yeah, okay," Max nodded quietly and walked back to the car with Lupin next to him. As they approached the car, Max took the car keys out of his pocket and tossed them to a puzzled Fuji.

"What in the hell do you want me to do with these?" Fuji inquired.

"Drive to the hotel we're staying at," replied Max.

"Huh?" Leo looked downward at Max with confusion.

"Well, she did a good job of cleaning on the back seat, right?" Max began.

"Yeah," the Lupin twins nodded.

"So that's where we'll be," said Max to Fuji with a smile as he took Leo by the tie.

"Oh, you're kidding," a horrified Fuji muttered. "Can't I go back to jail instead!"

"Nah—This is a worse punishment for you," Max opened the door to the car and pulled Leo into the back with him.

"Ohgod, ohgod…." Fuji said to herself in a worried yelp as she seated herself in the front seat. After looking in the review for three seconds, she pushed it out of her range of vision and started up the car in time to see a shoe fly to the front seat. She gulped dryly and pulled onto the main road, turning on the radio _very loud_.

It was morning by the time Fuji arrived home, tired, mentally scarred and her hand still hurting from where she had punched the man in the bar. She removed her jacket and heels and fell upon the couch, closing her eyes.

"Thank God I can finally sleep!" she sighed.

"Jared's dad came and picked him up," she heard in the dark recesses of the living room. She yelped, jumped, and fell to the floor in surprise. She looked upward at Odori, who was sitting on a chair in the living room.

"W-What do you mean?" asked Fuji. "He wasn't supposed to come until tomorrow!"

"He came early," Odori shrugged.

"What are you doing up early, anyway?" asked Fuji, raising an eyebrow.

"Meditating," replied Odori.

"I'm not surprised… Well… I'm sleeping now, because I'm tired, because I had a long night…."

"Okay…" there was a pause between the two before Odori spoke again, breaking their silence, "I saw a deer this morning. It was beautiful…"

"Why won't anyone let me sleep?" Fuji asked in a cry as she buried her face into the pillow.

Meanwhile, in another room, Toshiro awoke to a poking, and looked over his shoulder to see Yukiko looking back at him, "You think I should take another test?"

"No…. Yukiko face it, there've been signs, anyway," Toshiro yawned tiredly and rolled over to face her. "You've been eating more, you've been moodier, and you've gained weight. Especially in your stomach and—" he stopped as he saw an unamused look came upon Yukiko's face. "Well, they have…"

"I guess third time's a charm, huh?" she said, "Damn it… I hate karma so much…."

"What do you want to name it, anyway?"

"Duh. Goemon," sighed Yukiko tiredly, followed by a yawn.

"And for a girl?"

"It ain't a girl," she said with a shake of the head. "I know it isn't."

"You willing to bet money on that, Yukiko?"

"What? I'm carrying your friggin' child! You ought to be paying ME!" Yukiko shouted in response.

"It's July, right?" Toshiro asked.

"Yeah…"

"So that baby's going to be born in March… An Aries… With a Sagittarius and a Taurus for parents…."

"My head hurts suddenly," Yukiko rolled over and yawned. "I think I'll try to sleep it off…."

"You're not mad at me, are you?"

"Over twenty years we've known one another and you're still the same idiot," Yukiko said with a chuckle.

"Twenty-two years a few weeks back," Toshiro responded.

"Did you have that on a calendar or something?"

"I'll always remember the first time I saw a girl my age who wasn't on the TV," Toshiro chuckled. "Oh the offhand it's a girl, how about Toshiko?"

"Is that a suckup maneuver towards your mom or you just flashing your vanity?"

"Both," Toshiro admitted. He took hold of one of Yukiko's hands, "Thanks for doing this, again."

"What choice do I have?" Yukiko shrugged, "I'd be a hypocrite if I didn't take care of it. Afterall, I wasn't exactly planned, either…"

"Whoopsie baby's are just God's way of saying 'surprise!'," Toshiro chuckled.

"I guess the joke's on us then, neh?" Yukiko said with a small smirk.

Another part of Japan:

"Fuma? Never heard of them…." said Jared to his 'father'. The Japanese man smirked and took his son by the hand, walking him out of the barber where Jared had just received his first haircut from a professional stylist. He had chosen a buzzcut which gave him a scary resemblance to a long line of thieves which had been previously hidden by his long bangs.

"They're a group I belong to and that you now belong to, too," said the man with a smile. "We fight bad people like Lupin…."

"But the whole Lupin gang's nice!" said Jared sternly, "Especially Fuji, and Ally!"

"Heh, I was hoping I wouldn't have to tell you this, Jared," the young Asian man in a business suit sighed as he kneeled down in front of Jared.

"Tell me what?" Jared asked.

"Your mom… Didn't run away… Fuji just took you…." said the man sadly.

"No, that can't be right," said Jared with a shake of the head. "Why would she—"

"Because unfortunately some people are good at lying," the man sighed. "I'm so sorry you had to find out this way, Jared…"

"No, it's okay," Jared said in an obviously crestfallen tone. "I'm glad you told me…. So I'm part of the Fuma Clan now, too, right?"

"Exactly. Thata boy," he said with a smile, patting Jared on the back. "You'll like this, Jared… You get to go exciting places, and learn all sorts of neat things!"

"Like?"

"Well, I'll show you later. Right now let's just go get you some new clothes…."

"Yeah!" Jared nodded and smiled.

The man returned the smile, but for different reasons. If thievery was genetic, this boy would grow up to be a genius. He was technically Lupin the fifth, after all. Thanks to doctors who worked in the genetics lab Fuji had taken him to, they had managed to switch out the result with this man's DNA. Who was Jared to know that his father was actually in a northern Japanese city, and the man holding his hand was the leader of a clan of ninjas even more dangerous than the Rat Clan.

The Next Day, a flight to Great Britain:

"Well, that's the best picture of him now…." Leo said as he passed Max the photo of a small baby.

"So we have pick him up now?" Max asked as he looked at the photograph, "Damn he looks like you!"

"Yeah… Cecilia took the liberty of naming him, though…." said an annoyed Leo.

"You make that sound like a bad thing…" said Max with some confusion.

"It is…. It isn't Lupin the fifth," Leo said darkly.

"Can't you have it changed?"

"Yeah… It'll take about a month, though…" Leo grumbled.

"What'd she name the kid, anyway?" asked Max worriedly.

"Avery Taylor Lockwood…" said Leo with a shudder.

"Avery? Eww…. She must really not like him, I take it…." said Max.

Leo cleared his throat, and held up a hand like it were a telephone, and imitated a British voice, "I gave birth to it, so pick up your damn brat! Click."

"Jeeze…" Max cringed a little at this, "She's thrilled, eh?"

"She would've made his life a living hell if he'd stayed with her, as much as he looks like me…."

"Black hair, though…." Max shook his head, "He looks more like your dad…. You sure they didn't, eh…?"

"I'm positive," Leo chuckled. "I've shared a lot with my dad, but never women."

"Surprises me," Max muttered, much to Leo's annoyance.

Paris:

"So you're going to be a big sister now, huh, Dako?" said Lupin with a smile as he gave another turn of dial of the safe and waited until it gave a click, sounding its opening.

"Yup," Dako muttered as she held her ear to a twin safe, waiting for it to click. It did, and she smiled in satisfaction. She looked upward at Lupin and smiled as she shut the safe, "Leo would kill you if he knew you were teaching me how to—"

"Well, it's tradition. My grandma taught me how to be a thief, and I'm going to teach you…." Lupin said with a chuckle.

"You're going to teach my brother, too?"

"Of course, when he's old enough," Lupin answered.

"I feel like I'm kind of lying to them…." said Dako worriedly.

"Well, let's put it this way," Lupin lifted up Dako and carried her from the library into couch in the large living room. "Max kept his secrets, and Ari kept his, so why can't you have one or two of your own, huh? Especially if they're not hurting anybody!"

"But I'll hurt Leo if he finds out…." Dako retorted.

"Well, we'll just have to make sure that he doesn't find out, huh?" Lupin kissed her on the top of the head and smiled, "I don't want him mad at me, either, Dako…. But it's important that you know this stuff… Someone's got to carry my family name, damn it!"

"What about Fuji?"

"She doesn't seem like the type to even want kids, Dako," Lupin admitted with a shrug. "And some people are just like that, and that's okay. As long as I get one Lupin the Fifth out of them, I can die happy!" he shouted, rising from the couch.

"Oh, boy… Better save her from this speech while I can…." Fujiko said to herself as she watched Lupin ready himself for a long speech. "Dako, you want to help me with the kitchen?"

"Sure!" Dako quickly left Lupin's side for Fujiko, and Lupin gave a sigh and seated himself on the couch once again.

"Women…. They all leave me for the next best thing…." Lupin muttered to himself tiredly.

"Lupin, did you check the car like I asked you?" Fujiko shouted.

"Time for this thief to make his slick exit," Lupin muttered, rising and slinking into another area of the house.

A Tokyo bath house:

"You mean Ally actually got Heiji into fresh air?" Ryo said with a chuckle.

"I'm just as surprised as you," Odori admitted as she held Namiko just above the water in order to let the little girl's feet splash above the water.

"And Toshiro went, too?" Yukiko asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes, that appears to be the weirdest part of the whole story… Well, at least they're bonding…. If not Ally's probably shoved them both into the trunk of the Romeo by now…." Ryo said as she sunk a little lower into the water, "So, Yuki, you find out how far along you are yet?"

"Doctor said about a month," Yukiko answered. "….I'm sorry, Toshiro actually went to a shooting range!"

"Guess he needed to relieve a little stress," Ryo said with a shrug. She looked over to an unusually silent Fuji, who sat quietly sipping her sake from a wooden cup. "Fuji, you okay?" Ryo asked, knowing that on any other day Fuji would've stolen the show by this point.

"Huh? Oh, yeah… This is just some damn good sake!" Fuji said with a small chuckle, "Eh, can you feel it or anything yet, Yukiko?"

"Nah—Hell, it was a friggin' shock to me!" Yukiko admitted with a shrug. "Well, that kid'll have Mr. Jack Daniels to thank… It's the reason he's here!"

"Heh, yeah…. I guess I better lay off the drinking then!" Fuji said nervously, laying down the cup and then swimming towards Odori, "Here, let me hold the kid for a few seconds…"

"…. Fine…. But if she even begins to cry you're a dead woman," Odori responded seriously as she handed the girl to Fuji.

"Well, at least I'll have you and your cousin to spoil now, Nami-chan!" Fuji said with a chuckle.

"Hey, you never know, Fuji, maybe you'll have a change of heart and have a couple with Heiji!" Yukiko said as she leaned back on the wooden rail of the large tub.

"Excuse me?" Odori looked toward Fuji, and then back at Yukiko. "Did they…?"

"Oh, my, look at the time!" Fuji quickly handed Namiko off to Ryo, rose and grabbed a towel. "Gotta run!"

"You took advantage of my brother? Prepare to die, Fujiko Lupin!" Odori grabbed onto her sword and a kimono she had brought, and soon began to chase Fuji down the long corridor.

"Hey, Dori-chan, I didn't know you were part Zenigata!" Fuji laughed as she ducked into a room, jumped out as she realized it was a men's room, and then jumped back in after processing this for a few more moments.

"Get out of there, Fuji!" snapped Odori.

"Make me!" Fuji yelled from behind the paper door.

"Excuse me," Odori turned about and saw a tall, stern looking man staring back up at her, "I think I'll need to escort you out of this section personally…."

Odori's shoulders slumped, and she let out a small series of curses as the man led her down the hall.

A London Hospital:

"Hey there, Ave!" Leo said as he held the child in his arms. "Max, you want to hold him? He's yours, too…."

"Eh, yeah, why not?" Max shrugged and took the sleeping child in his arms, and looked down at him with some uncertainty. This would take some getting used to, that was for sure…

Leo turned around to sign another form while Max cradled the baby, and he looked upward and saw Cecilia storming down the hall, professional looking as usual. She stepped in front of Leo, and spoke harshly to him.

"If you attempt to make contact with me, or if it does, for that matter, I don't care who I have to arrest to do it," she said to Leo sternly. "And if he does get in touch with me, I'll tell him the truth; that the only reason I didn't have him aborted was because the thought of sending you to prison seemed so much nicer."

Leo nodded, "Okay. Thanks for the baby, Cecilia. Did you get the flowers we sent you? They were lilies…"

"The flower of death… Yes it is, yes it is!" Max said to the small baby.

Cecilia gave a sneer, "You two fags have a good life together… You deserve one another, trust me…."

"Your egg donor's such a bitch, Avery," Max said to the baby in a cooing tone. "Uh-huh… A big, British bitch… I'll have to teach you the word in Hebrew so you can tell her yourself when we sue her for child support, yeah!"

Cecilia, having nothing else to say, turned away from the happy family.

"Hey, Cecilia!" Leo called. Cecilia turned about and looked at him angrily, "Why Avery Taylor?"

"Simple," Cecilia shifted her weight onto one foot. "They're both men I caught while I was at Interpol. Thieves…. Thieves that actually got what they deserved…."

"Oh. I just thought you liked cartoons," said Leo with a shrug. "Bye, love ya! Thanks again for the 23 chromosomes!"

Cecilia turned around, and quickly exited the hospital. Leo looked back at Max, "You ready to go?"

"Yeah… Jeeze I'm so glad she decided to bottle feed with this kid… I think she would've eaten her young if we'd waited any longer…." Max nodded, and picked up a baby bag he and Leo had come with, and they made their way out to Max's car, and strapped the baby into the back seat. "I'm glad this kid isn't old enough to know what his parents were doing in this back seat a few weeks ago…"

"And that's how it's going to stay," said Leo as he climbed into the passenger seat. Max started up the car, and gave a small chuckle.

"What's so funny?" asked Leo.

"If he ever asks where he came from I can show him the website that video of you and the she-demon is on!" Max chuckled.

"Ha ha… At least I've been with a girl…"

"Did I ever show you how I decorated his room?" asked Max. "Dako and I did it…."

"Gosh our apartment's getting crowded…." said Leo, "And, no, you didn't….. Why?"

"You'll see…." Max chuckled.

Later that Night, Paris:

"Surpise!" Lupin and Dako shouted as Leo and Max switched on the light to their apartment.

"Wow… A party… How unexpected and yet something I expected from my parents…." Leo said with a sigh as he looked at the party decorations about the living room of the apartment.

"Well, wasn't just us, but I was in charge of anything that required taste…." Lupin said with a chuckle as he pointed over his shoulder to Zenigata, Natasha and Amaya, who sat at the dining room table. Fujiko stood next to her husband, holding a small box, and Dako quickly ran to the small child.

"I want to show him his room!" said Dako.

"Yeah… I want to see this, too…" said Leo with some worry as he walked down the hall and switched on the light, "MAXWELL CHAIM ZENIGATA-LUPIN!" Leo shrieked, "You son of a bitch dumb BASTARD!"

"Wow… That's the same pet talk you use on me, Fujicakes…." Lupin said with a chuckle.

"Hrm, only when you deserve it… Which is always," said Fujiko.

"I'm gonna go check on him…" Max chuckled and walked into the baby room, which was done completely in a _Mankii-chan _theme, "The studio you give those voice recordings loved the idea, Leo…."

"Yeah, but, but…." Leo sputtered.

"Aw, give it a rest… You'll wake up my brother," Dako sighed as she took the baby and set him in his crib. She turned back around to the two and led them out. "Now let's go get some cake… I've been trying to steal some of the frosting, but Ojiisan Zenigata's like a friggin' hawk…."

"Heh, not much gets past my dad…." Max chuckled.

"Please. He thinks to this day that Jake was a study-buddy of yours…" Leo muttered as they walked back out.

"Heh, yeah… Some secrets are best yet kept just that… Secrets…" said Max as he greeted the smiling faces.

"So, Ari, was the birth difficult?" asked Lupin with a chuckle.

"Yeah… Almost as bad as facing the birthmother," said Leo with a cringe. "I'm just glad she's gone now…"

"And the first time this kid even sounds like her, he's going to a private school!" snapped Max as he walked over to the cake.

"Heh, yeah… And we thought private school would work for you, too," Natasha snorted to a stunned Max. She chuckled, "You still turned out okay, though…" she added with a smile.

"Hey, I got two grandkids out of him, I'm happy," Zenigata said with a shrug.

"And now we're definitely relatives, Zenigata!" Lupin said with a smile.

"What I'm not happy is the fact that my grandson's going to have a smile like this moron!" Zenigata said as he lunged for Lupin.

"Too slow, old man!" Lupin chuckled.

"Yeah, well at least when I dye my hair it looks realistic!" shouted Zenigata.

"Ha! Who says I dye it! This is all natural, baby!" Lupin laughed.

"Heh, yeah, and you're not on Viagra," Zenigata snorted.

"Please let's never turn into them," Leo begged Max.

"You got it," Max nodded as he watched the two continue their chase about the apartment. There was the sound of a crash, and both moaned and looked at the topple bookshelf, and Lupin, who lied beneath it.

"Ha!" Zenigata laughed, "Who's the old man now, candy ass?"

"Did… Dad just say 'candy ass'?" Amaya asked in puzzlement.

"I… Think so…" Natasha replied.

"So," Fujiko turned back around to the cake. "Who wants to cut it?"

"Who wants to get this damn bookshelf off of me?" Lupin shouted.

"Count of three?" Leo asked, turning to Max.

"Count of three," Max nodded, and took one side of the bookshelf while Leo took the other. "One, two, three!"

Leo and Max finally released Lupin from his oak prison, and after cleaning up the broken glass from paperweights and the numerous books, the night passed by as normally as it could for the Lupins and the Zenigatas.


	21. Runaround

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Lupin III, but I made a ten-pound Jell-O snack, once. I'm now still barred from making gelatin of any sort to this day.

Eck, please tell me it's not already close to back to school again!

Well, not for a lot of people up north, but the closer to the south you get, the sooner it starts, you see (yes I'm a southerner—Those who make redneck jokes will be shot on site, so be forewarned). Sorry that this took so long to come out with; I really have no decent excuse this time. But thanks to everyone for the reviews, and I hope that you enjoy this long-coming chapter (The next one'll come out sooner—I promise!).

Fun Fact of Boredom: Odori and Ally were actually added last while working on a lineup for this series. Originally there were only five Lupin IV gang members, and this is still seen on some early sketches. In other early sketches Heiji is seen also wearing a gi in addition to Odori and Toshiro. This was a little bit overkill on the tradition samurai, though, so it was changed.

Chapter Twenty-One: Runaround

Paris:

At the sound of the screeching, Max rolled over and turned to Leo, "Your turn…."

"Didn't I just do the two 'o clock feeding?" Lupin muttered, throwing a blanket over his head and turning away from Zenigata.

"Yeah… And I did the three o' clock… It's four in the morning…." Max muttered and nudged Leo and little. "Your turn…"

"How much can one baby eat?" Leo sat up in bed, threw on a light kimono and trudged into Avery's room. He smiled as he looked down at the little boy and lifted him up, and suddenly grew aware of someone else in the bedroom. He reached above the doorway in Avery's room and pulled out a handgun. "Who's there? Come out or I shoot!"

"Ha… You'd never shoot me…" Fuji smiled as she stepped out of the shadows, holding a shiny package. "I came to drop off my nephew's birthday gift… I thought it'd be only right to come in person! Brought something for Dako, too, but I already left that in her room."

"You caused enough trouble with that one poor kid who you thought could be mine—Don't you think you should, like, be avoiding me now?" Leo inquired as he began to walk out to the kitchen. "Tea?"

"Eh, no, I can't stay long… My flight's in another hour. I just came out to say hello to Ari, Jr."

"Well, we changed it to Arsène Avery, but we're all used to calling him Ave by now, so that's what he goes by…" said Leo as he reached for a bottle in the refrigerator and closed the door with his foot. He yawned as he sat down in the kitchen chair, and looked upward at Fuji tiredly.

"You look exhausted…" Fuji said with a slight tone of worry. "That kid really take it out of you?"

"He cries so much it's unbelievable…" Leo said as he leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes. "I can't help but wonder how much Mom and Dad went through with us when we were born! I mean, there's only one here and he's about ready to kill me!"

"I'll take care of him for the night," said Fuji suddenly.

"Ha… You with a kid… That's rich… What about your flight?"

"Screw my flight! I can always catch another! Now let me hold him for a little while," Fuji motioned for her brother to hand her the baby, and Leo rested his chin on his palm, and was near sleeping on the hard wooden table. Fuji shook him awake, and Leo jumped and blinked a few times in surprise.

"How long was I out?" he asked, turning to his sister with a new alertness.

"You go to sleep, I've got this," Fuji instructed her brother.

"Yeah… Sounds good," Leo yawned and stretched, and shuffled back into his room. "Thanks, Fuji…"

"Yeah, yeah… Come on, Avery, let's go watch some cable!" Fuji lifted up the baby and led him in to the living room, and sat down with him on the couch. Avery happily sucked upon his bottle while Fuji flipped through the channels, thinking back to the group who still was unaware that she had even left them behind.

"Your Uncle Heiji'll probably love you… He really likes kids," Fuji said to Avery quietly. Avery looked upward at Fuji and yawned, and she gave a small laugh and led him into his room. "Your dads need a new apartment, desperately."

Tokyo, Japan:

"Why'd he bring us again?" Ally whispered to Toshiro as both walked a few paces behind Heiji, who looked about the city, quite determined on find some yet unannounced object.

"I don't know… Could have something to do with you taking us to the gun show… Or the fact that Fuji skipped out on us…" Toshiro replied. "He doesn't look mad, though, does he?"

"Nah—He's smiling, and it's scaring me a little… I know I still hate you, but if he goes crazy and goes to kill you suddenly, I'll save you. I'll expect the same from you in return, although I think your chances of getting killed are a lot greater."

"Deal," Toshiro whispered.

"This is the place," Heiji stopped and faced a small jewelry store.

"You, eh, know that they don't sell like computers or anything here, right, Heij?" Ally inquired as he scratched his head.

"I know," Heiji replied as he opened the shop door and a glass bell sounded. "You two want to wait out here?" he inquired as he stuck his head out of the shop.

"Yeah," Toshiro said quickly, answering for both himself and Ally in unison.

The two waited, somewhat uncomfortably, as Heiji took his time in the store, finally exiting about twenty minutes later, when Toshiro had begun to name off the different birds he saw flying about the city and Ally thought of different methods of murdering Toshiro and making it look accidental. Throwing him in front of a subway seemed to be his best bet, currently.

"What in the hell were you doing in there, anyway, Heiji?" asked Ally. "You don't even wear jewelry. Well, there's that jade Buddha around your neck, which I don't understand you wearing because I don't think you've ever even been in a temple…"

"It's because it's my mom's and I didn't go in there for me…" replied Heiji, tossing a small box to Ally. Jigen fumbled to catch it, and Toshiro gave a chuckle.

"I can see why you don't play baseball…"

"Your teeth are set to meet with my fist any second now," said Ally severely as he looked upward at Toshiro, unamused by this crack at his coordination. Ally opened the small box and blinked a few times, almost not believing what he saw. But, yes, there it was—A ring.

"Please tell me that isn't for Ally…" Toshiro said as he leaned down to get a better look of the diamond.

"Heh, I've already got a ring on, and it ain't leavin' anytime soon," Ally said as he tossed the ring back to Heiji. "You think she'll go for it?"

"I hope so…" Heiji stuck his hands in his pockets and looked back at the two. "I used most of what I made from the last heist to buy it!"

"Yeouch! How the hell much was this rock?" Ally yelped as he stopped in the middle of the street, next to the tall samurai.

"It pains me to even say the number aloud, or even think about it," Heiji gave a chuckle and pointed to where to a nearby subway. "How's that look, guys?"

"All of those perverts on the subs think I'm a really tall girl," Toshiro responded with a shudder. "They're worse than the New York ones! All that's on those are the homeless people, and they recognize me a lot of the time…"

"Okay… We'll take a taxi, then," Heiji smiled as he waved down a cab and climbed in, Ally and Toshiro following him into the back.

"Something our fathers definitely wouldn't have done, number twelve," said Ally with a mutter as he tried to make himself comfortable in between the two Ishikawas.

"Well, it was also a rarity that pregnancy wasn't followed by marriage," said Heiji. "Speaking of which, Toshiro…"

"We're talking , we're talking! You don't have to marry someone right away if they're pregant… Yeesh, gimme a break!"

"Especially if they're you…" Ally muttered, rolling his eyes and shaking his head. "Expect my dad on your doorstep after she tells him, by the way."

"Yes, I'm awaiting him with open arms…" Toshiro gave a small shudder; perhaps marriage wouldn't be so bad, in this instance. It was between that and coming face to face with a magnum in the early hours of the morning.

"Hey… Guys… This ain't the way to our hotel…" Ally muttered as the taxi took a turn into a small alleyway. The taxi driver stopped the car, and turned around, gun in hand.

"…I hate these types of guys…" Toshiro said with a sigh.

"Gimme your money!" the taxi driver shouted. "Hurry, hurry—Quick!"

"Yeah, yeah, we're coming," Ally reached slowly toward his back pocket, to the small gun he kept, but all were caught off guard by a sudden bumping atop the roof of the taxi.

"…What the hell was that?" Toshiro wondered aloud. There was another period of silence… And then a blade suddenly slashed through the roof of the car, and right between Ally's legs, missing anything vital by inches.

"Gya!" Ally scooted back against the seat of the car, and the taxi driver looked upward at the roof, which continued to make low thudding noises.

"Gimme a sword…" Heiji said to Toshiro quietly. The samurai nodded, and passed Heiji his smaller blade, Izanami.

"Who in the hell are you working with?" the taxi driver demanded as he waved his pistol in front of Ally's face.

"I almost got an instant neutering and you're asking _me _who they are? I don't have a friggin' clue!" Ally shouted in response.

A white smoke began to fill the area around the cab, and the glass behind the three men was shattered. Toshiro quickly turned around and held up his sword sheath, a sai missing impact with his skull and landing in the wood of the sheath.

"Let's get the hell outta here!" Ally shouted.

"I second!" Heiji replied as he opened the door to the cab and tumbled out.

The cabby took off before Toshiro could escape the vehicle, screaming, "You bastards are crazy!" Ishikawa looked upward and saw a black-cloaked figure looking back down at him, the intent to kill Toshiro apparent by the fact he held a sai in either hand. Toshiro scurried back into backseat of the cab, barely missing a beheading. The cabby shot a few times, but in vein. The ninja had escaped just as he turned out onto a major road.

Or so a too-soon calm Toshiro was led to suspect. The hole in the roof from the sword suddenly opened via a deafening explosion, and Toshiro was quickly pulled up onto the roof of the cab, while the would-be robber of a cabdriver continued to veer in and out of traffic.

"Now, die, Goemon!" the ninja shouted, and jumped off of the trunk and onto the top of a large semi. "Come and get me!"

"If you insist," Toshiro grasped his sword with his mouth, and lunged from the taxi, and onto an unsuspecting red car, and finally on to the semi. The ninja pulled out several metallic stars and threw them with ease, but Toshiro tucked and rolled, and the stars instead cut loose a billboard, causing it to collapse right in the middle of the intersection and as a result cause numerous cars to shriek to a halt. The semi wasn't spared; it screeched its brakes, and Toshiro, unprepared for the sudden stop, tumbled down onto his back. The ninja took this opportunity to run for him, but Ishikawa, knowing of no other alternative, rolled off the right-hand side of the road, toward the sidewalk.

The ninja smiled beneath his mask, believing Ishikawa to be a coward, and jumped off of the top of the truck, and into the blackness.

Toshiro, meanwhile, continued to cling to dear life on the side of the truck, which fortunately had ropes from a tarp covering the top, and gave him the ability to hold on until he felt it was safe enough to jump. He landed in front of a noodle stand, and ordered a large bowl of tempura.

Ally and Heiji had managed to find a still slightly shaken Toshiro, who had mainly stayed by the noodle stand in an attempt to blend in. This wasn't easy for a man who was a foot taller than anymore else in the city, had red hair and wore a traditional gi.

"Where in the hell were you?" Ally snapped. "We had like eight friggin' ninjas on our asses!"

Heiji tossed Toshiro his sword and ordered from the stand. "You couldn't have found your way back if you had tried, could you?"

"Not in the least," Toshiro admitted as he sipped from his bowl of noodles and fumbled with the chopsticks that were quite foreign to him nowadays.

"What's that mean?" a confused Ally inquired.

"I'm illiterate to the Japanese written language," Toshiro admitted.

"What! You mean you don't know how to right a single word?" Ally yelped.

"I can't read it very well, either," Toshiro admitted. "I speak it normally, though. I had to speak it a lot growing up… But there was never a great need to write or read it when I grew up in America."

"Jeeze…." Ally shook his head and leaned against the stand. "You have any idea who was after your ass this time? You probably have about as many enemies as Fuji…"

"He was wearing a crest, but I couldn't make it out," Toshiro shrugged. "He called me 'Goemon'. I'll willing to bet…"

"Willing to bet…?"

"Well, the man who… Who killed Julia all of those years ago… He promised that he'd be back for Yukiko… Now that she's going to have a baby he's probably pushed murdering us to the top of his schedule."

"A man? Toshiro, that was about nine men… One of whom knocked out one of my back friggin' molars! I need to get this taken care of before I go back to Cagliostro…" Ally muttered as he revealed a tooth from his pocket.

"You really are a mess. That scar and now the tooth… You need to hurry up and get married before you get too ugly," Heiji said in a chuckle.

Ally set aside his noodles and put up his fists, "Say that now, you fat son of a—"

"Would you three at least pay up before you go knock the crap out of one another?" the chef asked tiredly. Toshiro smiled and laid out several bills upon the counter, and the three began a walk toward their hotel, which seemed to be the best alternative now.

Ryo, Yukiko and Odori had gone out, however. Namiko was asleep in Odori's arms, and Odori looked downward at the little girl and smiled, and then gulped as she saw a poster which reminded her of her promise. Namiko was getting older now, and she was running out of excuses not to turn her over to her father and stepmother. In the beginning she hadn't even considered forming an attachment to the baby, but now separating her from Namiko was near impossible.

"How about in here?" Ryo pointed to a small clothing store, and Yukiko looked upward with some uncertainty. "Well you can't keep wearing a suit when you're pregnant… It'll get a little uncomfortable…."

"I'll wear them until can," Yukiko responded as she placed her hands in her pockets and looked up at the happy, cheery sign. "I'll get the stuff from Italy, like where I get my other clothes…. Japanese fashion is too bright for my tastes."

"Fine, fine… Damn you're picky…." Ryo shook her head and stopped dead. "Oh my God you're kidding…"

Victor Lupin nodded his thanks to the vendor, and then looked over at Ryo with a smile. Ryo rolled her eyes and quickly turned away, hoping to remain unnoticed.

"Ryoko!" Victor called, and ran to catch up with her. He met with the barrel of Yukiko's gun and the sharp side of Odori's blade, however. Both weapons hovered dangerously close to his body.

"Guys, it's fine," Ryo sighed, shooing the two women aside and taking a step forward toward Victor. "What the hell do you want, Victor?"

"We haven't seen one another in a while, it seems…" Victor took a bite of the ice cream cone he had purchased and then offered it to Ryo, who declined.

"With reason," Ryo snapped, folding her arms across her chest. She looked over her shoulder at Yukiko and Odori, "Do you think you two would mind going on without me? I'll deal with him…"

"I'm so sure…" Odori muttered and walked into the maternity shop, Yukiko following her quickly, never taking her eyes off of Victor and Ryo.

"You aren't here by accident, I'm guessing," Ryo failed to leave her guarded position, and frowned at the thought of Victor continuing to stalk her.

"I wanted to know if you were free this evening," Victor smiled and tossed the ice cream cone aside. "I'm in town with nothing in particular to do… From the look you're giving me you're still not sure if you can take me at face value, I assume…"

"Damn straight," Ryo muttered, not bothering to make eye contact with Lupin.

Victor smiled, stepped closer to her and grasped her arms tightly, "You're not looking at me because of who I look like… Well, he's definitely gone now, Ryoko… Don't you think it's time you moved on…"

"Not with you," Ryo snapped.

"You're just like your father… When's the last time you even had a good man, huh? It must be years… I've never seen you around with anyone."

"And how in the hell would you know this!" Ryo broke out of his grasp and glared icily at Victor. "I want you to quit spying on me, all right? It's friggin' creepy!"

"You need someone to look after you…" Victor responded. "What are you doing tonight?"

"Buying mace," Ryo snapped, and began to venture in to the same store which her sister and Odori had wandered in to only moments ago. Victor quickly took her by the shoulder and turned her about to face him. "Get…. Your damn hands… Off of me, _now_."

"It must hurt to see him leave you for a guy… But at least you don't have to ask yourself 'what does he have that I don't'. It's rather self explanatory…"

Ryo growled, lunged forward and grabbed Victor by the shirt collar, bringing Lupin down to her level, "You better pray that you were talking about a menorah…"

"You can call it that…" Victor removed Ryo's grip from his neck and frowned, rubbing the back of his neck. "Why do you bother with Ari, anyway? That little Nancy's got a screw buddy and two little brats… And yet you still keep this lit-tle flicker of hope that he'll drop it all for you; don't deny it."

"Would you just shut up?" Ryo growled.

"…I want to take you out tonight…."

"That's rich. Does every date come with an insult?"

"I'm serious… Please? I promise nothing funny…."

"The only way that could happen is if you dropped your pants. Where to?"

Victor tried to ignore this jab, and moved on to Ryo's question, "A steakhouse… It's on a boat…"

"With my luck it'll crash and we'll be stuck on an island together… I'll go, but only for the free meal…"

"Sounds good… And perhaps I'll end up convincing you that I'm not the complete bastard the papers make me out to be."

"The papers don't need to tell me that you're a complete bastard…. You hailing a cab?"

"I brought my own vehicle… I don't trust taxi cabs…"

"I'm driving…"

"I rather you didn't…"

"Good—Then I'm definitely driving," Ryo smirked and reached in to Victor's pocket, pulling out his car keys and holding them up to his face. "Now where is it, hrm?"

"Over there," Victor pointed over her shoulder at a red Porsche parallel parked outside of a flower shop. A small amused smile came over Ryo's face, and she approached the car and seated herself in the driver's side. Almost as soon as Victor stepped in she started up the car, peeling out into traffic expertly.

The restaurant was indeed on a ferry, and the waiters seemed to know Victor by name, although it was pronounced with a Japanese accent. Victor made sure to push in Ryo's seat for her, and then he seated himself and glanced over the menu. He removed a pair of reading glasses and sighed after a futile struggle to read the fine print, and he looked over the paper at Ryo's suddenly renewed expression of surprise.

"…What?" Victor inquired, and then caught glance of himself in a nearby hanging mirror, and glared. He knew exactly who he looked like with the reading glasses, and he swallowed hard and resumed reading his menu. "…I think I'm going to get the fish…"

"I… I'm sorry, I can't do this," Ryo raised her hands and tossed down her menu upon the table. She rose from her seat and took another sip of her wine. "Listen, I'm sure that at least at some point we could've gotten along, but, I just can't do this. I'm sorry, Victor."

"That's a new one," Victor said, raising an eyebrow.

"Five seconds without the smart ass comments, please?" Ryo snapped. "I've got to go…"

"Ryoko, wait!" Victor began to run after her, but crashed into a waiter, and ended up on the floor, covered in lasagna. "My damn luck…"

Ryo made it just before the ferry was about to set sail, and strolled down the sidewalk, back towards the hotel. She placed her hands in her pockets, and felt the Porsche keys still in one. "I'll just give them to him next time I see him, because I know I will…" she muttered.

"Okay, where's Fuji?—You both are under arrest!" Ryo gasped as she recognized the voice, and she spun around and saw Ari standing behind her, wearing his usual warm smile.

"I… Ari? Wh-Why aren't you in France with the baby?" Ryo asked as she took a step forward and smiled.

Ari gave a small, familiar chuckle and scratched the back of his head, "Max and I are visiting relatives…. I saw Fuji earlier and made her tell me where you were… Then I just kinda followed you from the baby shop to here… You want to go for a walk, my treat?"

"Well, yeah, definitely!" Ryo nodded. Ari extended his arm and linked it with Ryo's, and she smiled and leaned her head upon his shoulder.

After walking for some time in the silence, Ari seated himself on a park bench, and Ryo soon followed, still leaning on him.

"You remember when we went to the Spring Festival here?" Ryo said with a nostalgic smile. "You bought that stupid Nôh mask? We went with Ally, and Heiji… Fuji was in town, too, but she had a date to keep…"

"How couldn't I forget?" Ari smiled and placed a hand over Ryo's. Ryo removed her head from Ari's shoulder and kissed him with no protest from Lupin. He smiled and gave a small laugh as she broke away from him, and he embraced her in return. "I missed that a lot…"

"I do, too," Ryo whispered. "…Ari?"

"…Hrm?"

"We never went to a Spring Festival in Tokyo…" Ryo broke away from him and sighed. "You can take off the jacket, Victor… I know you despise purple…"

"How'd you know?" asked Victor as his voice dropped to its usual tone and he removed the purple blazer and then brown contacts, revealing his naturally blue eyes.

"Fuji called me from France two hours ago… She either took a hell of a flight or she's got some kind of time machine she's yet to tell me about…"

"…It wasn't a maneuver to get into your pants or anything. My apologies for causing you any distress…." Victor sighed, removed his reading glasses and placed them in his shirt pocket. He placed his hands beneath his head and closed his eyes as he leaned back upon the stone bench.

"It's okay… I kind of get what you were doing, in a weird way… You just wanted to give me Ari for an hour," Ryo sighed. She was back to her melancholy tone and expression by now. Victor opened one eye to look at her to almost try to see if the sincerity was natural, or she was getting ready to shoot him. She looked extremely sincere, so she was either being honest or an exceptional actress, Victor thought to himself as he laid his hands on his thighs and allowed them to rest there while he spoke to Ryo.

"I suppose you caught me…" Victor sighed and dropped his head a little. "Still… You deserve someone who won't hurt you like my cousin and myself have done… I've screwed over your gang so much in the past it isn't even funny…"

"Yeah, but with your dad, all things considered, you turned out okay… I mean, what kind of sadist kills his brothers and sisters, anyway?"

"I suppose every great king has some madness behind him, and my father deserved to carrying on his father's legacy…. Not that hackneyed old twit… He simply viewed it as steps to get ahead…"

"Yeah, but Napoleon was considered a great leader, too, before he was banished to an island… Kind of like your dad was…"

"Napoleon was a fine man, close to a god."

"I'll bet you wouldn't have said that if you had lived with him…" Ryo sighed and fumbled with her bracelets a little before clearing her throat and continuing to speak with Victor. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but do you still want to go out?"

"I'm afraid I can't… I lost my car keys…"

Ryo smiled and held up the keys, and Victor blinked a few times in surprise. He hadn't just been trying to be cute, after all. He had really forgotten about her having them.

His smile faded, however, when he saw someone in a great distance… A jogger in all black on a Tokyo summer night was odd, the fact that he carried a sword, even stranger. "Get down…" he whispered to Ryo.

"What… Are you… You son of a bitch, you really don't change, do you?" Ryo snapped angrily and rose from the bench, glowering at Lupin. Victor quickly grabbed her by the arm and threw himself down to the ground with her, and Ryo barely missed the blade. She turned around in wide-eyed shock, and before she could register the ninja, Victor had already fired a shot.

The ninja ducked, and hit Victor hard in the throat. Victor went down, coughing and struggling for air, and now Ryo drew her gun and fired a shot. The ninja dodged this with his sword, and aimed to kick Ryo. She turned about and kicked sand in his eyes. She stepped down hard upon her sandal, which released a blade, and while the ninja briefly wiped his eyes, she kicked and slashed him across the hand he held his sword in. He dropped his sword momentarily, and before he had the chance to pick it up, Victor had grabbed it and rose, although still on shaking feet. The ninja released and powder that sent both into a coughing fit, and they had to quickly run from the cloud of gas, before they suffocated.

The ran to the car, Victor occasionally lagging behind, but trying to hide the fact that he was in the middle of a major asthma attack. By the time they reached the car, he was gasped like a fish out of water.

"Oh, God, don't you go dying on me!" Ryo opened the passenger side door and began to search through the glove compartment. She finally found an inhaler (amongst numerous things she'd preferred not to have seen, such as a woman's bra) and placed it in Victor's mouth. After a few puffs he relaxed some and was able to use the inhaler on his own.

Ryo slowly walked over to the driver's side of the car, still looking at Victor with a sense of worry. He was quiet as she began to drive, merely looking straight ahead silently with a tired expression that hid his dashed pride.

"…You didn't tell me you had asthma…" Ryo said quietly.

"…It seems it was a latent disease that's only come to light in this generation…."

"I saw you had cigarettes in there… If I see you ever smoking one of them, or near one of them, I'm going to give you a kick so hard in that place you don't want to be kicked in you'll go into a coma."

"Eh, deal, I suppose."

"No deals—This is me telling your ass that I'm not losing another Lupin. I feel almost like a plague upon the family…"

"You're no worse than the Mines."

"Oh, that makes me feel much better…"

"…Um, all the same, thank you…." Victor cleared his throat and grew visibly uncomfortable.

"I don't know if they were for you or me, so you can stay in our hotel tonight. I'll hide you from Odori. Fuji's out, so I know just who you can bunk with…"

"Who?" Victor inquired, blinking a few times and wondering if this was some sort of trap.

Later, a Tokyo hotel:

"No," Heiji repeated sternly. "No, no, no, no, no! Why can't he bunk with Ally?"

"Heiji, please, do this for me! I've never asked you for a single thing!" Ryo clasped her hands together. "And if he bunks with Ally, Dad'll find out and then everybody'll know!"

"Why am I sensing I'm not well liked in any of the Lupin family?" Victor said to himself.

"Hey, I already got assaulted tonight, the last thing I need is for this SOB to smother me in my sleep," Heiji snapped, pointing to Victor. "I don't trust him, and why you brought him here is a mystery to me…"

"You just need to make she Odori doesn't find him…" Ryo smiled pleadingly at Heiji. "I'll put in a good word with Fuji for you…"

"I don't need that…" Heiji grumbled.

"Wow, you really are the Fujiko character here," said Victor as he watched Heiji stand his ground.

"What in the hell's that supposed to mean?" Heiji growled.

"Nothing," Victor held up his hands and spoke meekly.

"Heiji, please, do this for me… I've had a rough year," said Ryo tiredly. She sighed heavily as she watched Heiji's unwavering expression. "What the hell do you want—Come on, Heiji, if this were Fuji, you'd do it for her…"

"That's because he probably screws her, too…" Victor said with a sly smirk.

"Well, I draw the line there," Ryo sighed.

"…Okay, Ryoko, I'll do this, but I'm not going to be happy about this, and you owe me big time…" Heiji said with a roll of the eyes, motioning for Victor to enter his room. Heiji closed the door behind Lupin, and cornered Ryo into the hall. "Why in the hell is he here, anyway?"

"We got attacked tonight…" Ryo explained, "He tried to save my life and nearly died in the process of it."

"What? You, too? Let me guess, by ninjas, right?"

"Um… Yeah… You guys met them too, I'm guessing?"

"Yup," Heiji nodded. "They were after Toshiro, though… Why in the hell did they go after you and Victor? Toshiro says that they're after Yukiko…"

"Maybe they were distractions… Crap, are they even home, yet?" Ryo gasped and placed a hand over her open mouth. "I left Yukiko with Odori and Namiko!"

Heiji's almond eyes became round, and he too suddenly gave a worried expression. He turned around to use a phone, but was stopped by the site of a still-panting Odori and Yukiko. Jigen was sitting upon the ground, her fedora pressed over her eyes. Odori's red gi, upon further inspection, was soaked in some sort of liquid. Namiko wasn't covered in any of the liquid, but she still looked shaken. From the coppery smell Odori gave off, it didn't take a genius like Heiji to figure out what had happened.

"They tried to grab Yukiko while I was fighting them…" Odori said as she leaned against the hotel wall. As she moved her hand, much to Heiji's horror, she left a red handprint. "We escaped, though."

"So I was right," Ryo looked past Odori at her sister, and kneeled down beside Yukiko.

"What, they attacked you, too?" Odori turned around to face Ryo. Heiji took his niece and embraced her tightly, whispering something reassuring to her while he rocked her back and forth.

"They got all of us," Ryo responded as she placed a hand upon Yukiko's shoulder. "Yuki, are you okay?"

"I can't friggin' have this thing if it's going the mean everybody's lives are in danger…" Yukiko said with a shake of the head. "Toshiro'll give me hell for it, but I just can't have it…."

"What? What are you—Yukiko, you're not serious!" Ryo gasped. "You can't do that… It'll break his heart, Yuki, and Toshiro's had more of that in his life than any of us. If you get rid of it you'll just be helping them!"

"Plus I'll kill you if you do that, Yukiko…" Odori said calmly.

Yukiko shot Odori a wicked glare and spat, "Like you never thought about it? At least the guy who got me pregnant wasn't married!"

"Are you trying to call me some sort of cheap whore?" snapped Odori. "I just saved your life, you ingrate!"

"Back off, bitch, before I kick your midget Korean ass…." Yukiko said slowly. Odori went to draw her sword, and Yukiko her gun, but Heiji quickly grabbed his sister, and Ryo grabbed hold of Yukiko's hands.

"I've got to get out of here…" Yukiko broke free of Ryo's grasp and rose. "I've got to go…"

"You aren't going _anywhere_…" Yukiko's stomach sank as she heard Toshiro, in an unusually angered tone. He stood in the doorway of his room. Ally was across the hall, his door also opened. Jigen said nothing, however, and his eyes sifted nervously from Yukiko to Toshiro and back. Victor had also opened his door to see what the yelling was about, and Odori had to do a double take when she saw him.

"I can go wherever the hell I want, Toshiro," Yukiko said as she adjusted her fedora as she usually did when preparing for a fight.

"You were almost kidnapped by someone who, if catches you, will kill you, baby or not," said Toshiro with a snap. "He did it to Julia and the baby, and he'll do it to you, too."

"You know, I didn't sign up for a bunch of assassins to get on my ass when I hooked up with you," Yukiko snapped. "I didn't sign up for a kid, either, and now look at me! I don't want a baby, and I never wanted one. I'm only keeping it because you already lost one!"

"If Fuji were here, she'd rain down upon you like the fires of hell," said Odori in a quiet seethe.

"Drop the bushido BS for three seconds, Ishikawa," snapped Yukiko, holding up a hand in motion for Odori to quit the long speech she would've probably gone into had she been allowed to continue. "This is between me and Toshiro." She turned back to Toshiro and gulped hard, "This wasn't happening before, when we were still dating."

"What in the hell does that mean?" Toshiro asked, a little afraid to ask but going ahead with the question, anyway.

"Maybe we need to take it back a step or two," Yukiko removed the silver band on her left hand and placed it in Toshiro's. "I've got to get to sleep…"

"What the hell?" a stunned Toshiro muttered. He nodded and laughed a little, "Ohhh I get it… This is your way out!"

"What?"

"You've been nervous about this for months. All of this time and you still can't even commit to a board game!" Toshiro said. "I don't just go around asking people to marry me, you know. I gave up a lot to be with you, damn it, and it's time you gave a little back! I've got another life, unlike anybody else here! I don't rely on this to just let myself know I'm alive."

"Well, I—" Ally began, and was quickly quieted by Toshiro.

"Shut up for once in your life, you psychopathic Bruce Lee knockoff!" Toshiro shouted, and slammed Ally's door, nearly trapping Jigen in between the doorway and door. Ally, who was on the other end, silently backed away from the door and towards a phone. He dialed the phone, and waited.

"Hello, Carmen? Oh, I was just thinking about you… Wow, that early, huh? Um, I'm sorry… Yeah, just wanted to call and say I loved you," Ally said, trying to distract himself from the fighting outside of his door.

Odori had soon grown disgusted of this and retired to bed, as did Heiji, who went into his room and watched a game of soccer in silence with Victor. Ryo shook her head and rolled her eyes, and decided to let Yukiko and Toshiro have at it. They had to get to sleep at some time.

The two had no idea how long the fighting continued, but it covered everything that annoyed one about the other, everything they had held back on in the past twenty years. Yukiko finally went to throw a punch at Toshiro, just to shut him up, but Toshiro stepped aside, and Fujiko Lupin, who had just arrived home from her midnight flight to Tokyo, crashed onto the floor, sporting a new black eye.

Both looked downward at the K.O.'d Fuji in stunned silence, and after a few moments Toshiro nudged her with his foot ever so slightly.

"Well, she's alive…" Yukiko said with a shrug.

"We should go get her some ice…" said Toshiro, lifting up Fuji and carrying her into his and Yukiko's room while Yukiko held open the door.

Toshiro laid her upon their bed while Yukiko went to preparing an ice pack, and after lying it upon her eye Yukiko seated herself across from Toshiro, who was staring at the fireplace. The odd thing about the fireplace was that it contained no fire, currently. He was just looking at something to avoid eye contact with Yukiko.

"Listen, I…. We both said a lot of stupid things…" said Yukiko as she cleared her throat. "I just got freaked out, is all."

"You have a right to," said Toshiro quietly. "I'm sorry for all of this… If I could rewrite anything, I wouldn't be some bastard clan pact in limbo."

"You're not just some kind of friggin' pact! Goemon never thought about you like that, and neither did anybody in the Lupin gang! The only ones who looked at you like that were your grandmother and your mother, and they're both evil, anyway."

"My grandmother was…. Only ignorant… I do owe her some kind words, though. The woman did raise me as he own. My mother is still too traditional in her beliefs. I know our relationship's strained, but I'm not losing any sleep over it."

"Yeah, let's make this one actually like us," said Yukiko with a chuckle as she rested her hand upon her hand and smiled. "Promise now that neither of us will fake our deaths or let our parents raise it."

"Faking a death is a pain in ass, anyway," said Toshiro in a mutter.

Yukiko lifted herself from her seat, walked over to Toshiro and kissed him, "We'll just have to face those bastards, then. I don't care who they are; you screw up my kid you screw with Yukiko Jigen."

"Soon Ishikawa."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever…"

Fuji came to during this, but neither seemed to take notice. She removed the ice pack and sat up in the bed. "Damn, I had a three way and kept my shoes on? I must be better than I think…"

Yukiko looked over at Fuji, and then at Toshiro, "You want to explain to her what really happened?"

"Er, we'll leave it until the morning… We'll just let her find out who Heiji's bunking with now," Toshiro answered. "It ought to be sickly amusing."

"Yeah, more fun than watching your pigeons preen themselves."

"Don't pick on them; they're family."

"Could someone tell me why in the hell my face hurts?" Fuji asked. "Someone just tell me what the hell's going on? That'd be a good start…"


	22. Going to the Chapel

DISCLAIMER: Yeah, I don't own Lupin III… But for what it's worth, I wouldn't mind even a share…

Welkommen!

Another long-awaited chapter… Sorry for the wait, but I had a series of events happen to be over the past two weeks that would make a _National Lampoon_ movie seem tame. I'm sure my television and phone exploding in one afternoon will see humorous ten years from now. Thanks to everyone who's reviewed, as always… It's always, always appreciated. Anyway, onward with the chapter!

Fun Fact of Boredom: There are now so many chapters I need to keep a list to make sure I don't reuse a song title.

Chapter Twenty-Two: Going to the Chapel

"Of all the rotten things for her to do…" Leo yawned and stretched in the kitchen chair and then fed Avery another spoonful of baby food. "I was hoping she'd at least stay out of trouble for another month."

"Well, at least your parents are coming," Max sighed and flipped another pancake in the griddle he worked from and then joined Lupin in his yawning.

"I'm just more interested in spending time with Ave, right now…." said Leo. He smiled as Avery banged his hands up and down on his tray and laughed, "Okay, okay! You certainly do have your grandpa's patience, Avery…."

"Which one?" Max looked over his shoulder at Leo and Avery and then went back to his work at the stove.

"I got a job offer in Japan… A production company wants me to sign a ten-year contract…"

"Are you going to take it?"

"It'd mean giving up Interpol, plus the closest relative we'd be near to would be your sister, and she has enough problems with her own kids. It wouldn't be fair to you… You never really got along with other Japanese people."

"Not even my father… Most of the time not even with you," Max chuckled. "If you want to take the job, then that's okay."

"My biggest concern is Dako… She's an American, and moving her to France was rough enough… There's enough anti-American sentiment with some people to cut with a knife," Leo gave a heavy sigh and leaned back in his chair, looking upward at the ceiling. "Money isn't even really the issue; I just don't want to have Dako and Avery coming to me twenty years from now and claming that Grandpa and Grandpa raised them, not us. I feel like we drop those kids on my parents too much. They don't mind, but I want to be there for everything…"

"I can't blame you. But what Fuji's doing is wrong, and you're watching out for her, too. You promised her," said Max. "And I'm a Zenigata, so it's in my blood to chase them."

"I'm going to turn on the news… I'm just getting upset thinking about all of this crap…" Leo picked up Avery and a drool-cloth, just in case he decided to share his just-digested breakfast with his father.

Avery gripped onto his father's black and white kimono as Leo seated himself on the couch and turned on the television, and laughed at his father's horrified expression.

"And in other news, the Lupin the Fourth gang was stopped making quite a scene in Tokyo, last night," said the reporter in French (although this was translated for the sake of non-French speaking readers). "Several were spotted in a downtown area; the three men of the group, Daisuke Jigen the second and brothers Heiji and Goemon Ishikawa the fourteenth, were the cause of a major traffic backup during rush hour which led to ambulances sending four people to the hospital. Odori Ishikawa and Yukiko Jigen were later spotted in front of a maternity store also in battle. This, of course, also raises the question if either woman is pregnant…"

"M-Max!" Leo shouted and took a step back in his living room and he watched the recorded scenes of destruction ensue upon his second-rate television.

"Son of a…" Max's eyes grew wide as he stuck his head out of the kitchen doorway and listened carefully to the news report.

"In a related story, Ryoko Jigen was seen last night with Victor Lupin at a popular upscale restaurant," the report continued. "We here at channel eight have exclusive pictures which a tourist took last night while enjoying his dinner…. There have been rumors lately about a romantic relationship between the two."

"Romantic relationship my ass!" Leo fumed, stormed over to Max and passed him Avery.

"And what are you doing?" asked Max with a raised eyebrow.

Leo undid his kimono while he spoke to Max and walked to their bedroom. He loaded his gun and spoke to Max while standing in his boxers, "I'm going to make it so Victor comes nowhere near her again. I may not have the relationship I used to with Ryo, but that doesn't mean I can't save her from a jerk like Victor…"

"What just happened to 'Oh, we better quit'?" asked Max.

Leo was too busy dressing to catch Zenigata's slightly accusatory tone to catch on to the fact that Max was slightly suspicious of all of this. "This is different, Max. Ryoko's different. She's impressionable and Victor's manipulative. It's a volatile mix, if you ask me."

"Uh-huh…" Max said disbelievingly as he turned his back to Leo and walked into the kitchen. "Avery, you need a bath; you smell…." Max added in a mutter, "More than your father's story…"

Max was giving Avery a bath in the sink while Leo put on his purple jacket and walked back into the kitchen. Max looked up at Leo briefly, and then went back to concentrating on giving Avery his bath.

"To think, ten years ago you were running with a gang and I was out stealing," Leo laughed as he looked down at Avery and smiled happily. "Now look at us… Oh, don't get any his ears, Max…"

"I know, Leo," Max closed his eyes and heaved a sigh. "I've handled kids, before."

"Ummm….. Are you mad at me?"

Max turned to Leo and spat sarcastically, "No…"

"Okay, what'd I do now?" asked Leo worriedly.

"You're all for quitting until Ryo's name pops up… But that's always how it is."

"Are you jealous of my ex?"

"…Get me a towel for Avery…. I'm done…" Max said quietly. Leo nodded and handed him a towel, and Max lifted out the soaked baby and began to dry him. "Everytime it's something with Ryoko, you drop everything to go after her…"

"Max, we went through a lot together! I almost married her!" Leo exclaimed. "I can't not feel anything for her after that long! How many times are you going to get jealous of her, anyway? God… What the hell—It's not enough that I tell you I love you? What in the hell do you want from me, Max!"

"I'm going to go dress him…" Max completely blew off the subject, and left Leo alone in the kitchen while he went to go dress their son.

"This marriage is going to end in divorce court, yet…" Leo said worriedly.

"Hey, Leo!" Max ran back out into the kitchen, carrying a small portable radio. "I need you to do something for me…"

"What, now?" asked Leo, placing a hand on his forehead and waiting.

"Put in one of those J-Pop CDs you get Dako, and turn it up all of the way. Make sure it's at top volume when you start it…." Max instructed.

"What! Our neighbors'll kill us!" Leo shouted.

"Just do it," Max said sternly. Leo sighed and plugged in the radio, and blasted it all full volume for a few seconds. This jarred Dako out of her sleep, and she trudged out.

"What in the hell are you two doing now?" Dako yawned. "Are you doing it? Oh, God, I don't want to know…"

"Now will you tell me what that was for?" Leo asked as Max ran back out. Leo took one look at Max's worried expression and ran over to Zenigata, placing his hands on Zenigata's arms. "What's wrong?"

"What don't you hear that you should be able to?" asked Max.

"…..Avery….."

"He should be crying, right? I mean, I saw all of my nieces and nephews do that to a loud noise…."

"….Yeah…." Leo ran into Avery's room, and he and Max watched the little boy laugh and look upward at the ceiling, oblivious to the noise of the music. But Avery was oblivious to any sounds at all.

Tokyo:

"So now I'm up to date, right?" Fuji inquired. Toshiro and Yukiko, who sat on either side of their bed, nodded in response. "That's weird; all of those ninjas…. I wonder if there's something more behind this… They weren't the Rat Clan, from the sounds of it, Toshiro. Your mom may not like you, but she made a pact that she wouldn't harm you anymore…"

"And if it's one thing she's actually good at, it's her word…." Toshiro added.

"I'll get to the bottom of this; until then you guys just take it easy," Fuji rose and rubbed her sore and blackened eye. "I'm going to head to sleep in my own room. I'm a little over sleepovers."

"All right—Goodnight, Fuji," Toshiro opened the door and let her out, and then closed it behind her, and turned to Yukiko. "Perhaps you could hide out at my place for a while; I've got that new house, and they probably don't know about it, yet."

"Nah, I'm stayin' with you. I ain't running," Yukiko replied. "Baby or not, I'll be able to take it."

"But will the baby. We've got to think about it, too," Toshiro moved over to her and placed a hand on her stomach.

"This isn't friggin' fair…. You like kids more, you should've carried it. I've got to call a shop in Italy Friday, see if they can make me some special suits…" Yukiko moaned and fell back on the bed, covering her face with her fedora.

"How about calling your father and telling him?" Toshiro, "You're going to be extremely pregnant by the time you come home for Christmas—You won't be able to hide it forever."

"I'll call him tomorrow. Better yet, I'll see if I can get a conference call with him, Lupin and Goemon. They're like a gossipy group of old women. If I tell one, the others'll get jealous that I told him first."

"Eh, I don't care who you tell… As long as it's you doing the talking…. I did my work already."

"Excuse me? Ha ha… I've got nine months ahead of me; ten minutes and your work was done!"

"Hey! That was _at least_ twelve!"

"Keep foolin' yourself, man…." Yukiko chuckled.

Fuji, meanwhile, yawned and knocked upon Heiji's door, "What a freaking night…. A black eye, ninjas…. Victor… Sometimes it makes a girl want to curl up and let the earth swallow her whole…"

Heiji opened the door to their hotel room and smiled, "Hey! I wasn't expecting you home so early!"

"Me, either…. Yukiko-san and Toshiro-chan just filled me in on everything," Fuji smiled and threw herself down upon her bed. "Jet lag's such a bitch! I just can't wait to get to sleep… I'm even too tired to be a pervert, tonight."

"Woah, that's a new one," said an amused Heiji. He sat down upon the bed and placed a hand on Fuji's shoulder, "I really missed you…."

"Uh-hm," Fuji muttered, her face down in the pillows of the bed.

"I wanted to ask you something; I'm kinda glad You're back so early!" Heiji admitted with a chuckle. "I probably would've just asked you over the phone if you hadn't made it home, yet, though."

Fuji rolled over and raised an eyebrow, looking at Heiji suspiciously. She sat up in the bed and rested her hands upon her lap, "What sort of question?"

Heiji leaned in and kissed her, and placed the small box he had picked up only hours beforehand in one of her hands. Fuji looked down at her hand, at the box, and bit her bottom lip.

"I hope it fits," Heiji said hopefully. "I borrowed Yukiko's ring; it was about the same size."

Heiji, I…." Fuji's mouth twitched, and she opened the box and looked downward at the diamond. "Um… This is really nice of you…."

"Try it on and see if it fits…" Heiji said with a smile. "I know it's not like anything you steal, but it's the thought that counts, right?"

"Heiji, I, I can't!" Fuji sputtered, and rose from the bed. "L-Listen… I'm not the kind of person who… It, it isn't you, I promise!"

"There's someone at the window," Heiji rose and reached beneath his bed for a bow and arrow kit he often brought with him. He may have been more skilled with the keyboard, but he was also quite handy at the bow and arrow.

Fuji reached for her gun, and quickly spun around, shooting at the ninja. The ninja duckedFuji reached for her gun, and quickly spun around, shooting at the ninja. The ninja ducked, and then silence followed. Both thief and hacker looked about tensely, listening for their assailant.

The glass suddenly smashed through, and the ninja scuttled in and disappeared into the shadows while Fuji and Heiji hid their eyes from the glass shards.

"Where the hell is it?" snapped Heiji.

"Gya! Duck!" Fuji pounced upon Heiji, and both fell to the floor while the ninja retained its position of clinging to the wall above their headboard.

"Don't worry!" the ninja shouted. "I'm not going to harm you!"

"Yeah huh, that's not what my terrified little gut's saying!" Fuji yelled.

The ninja jumped down, and removed his mask, revealing a more attractive than usual Asian man beneath, "You're Lupin the Fourth, correct?"

"Umm… That's one of my names, yeah…" Fuji replied, scanning him up and down as she spoke to him.

"I think we have an apology to make… And an offer," he announced as he tucked his mask into his sash.

"I'm al ears, Buddy," Fuji said numbly.

France:

The doctor set down his stethoscope and jotted down a few more notes while Avery sat down on the paper-covered table and his father remained in their corner, Leo standing the corner looking at his son with a mixture of guilt and fear and Max wearing an unreadable expression as he sat in the chair of the office, one leg crossed over the other.

"Well, gentlemen…" the doctor seated himself in a rolling chair and worked his way over to Leo and Max, and then continued. "There are several options we can take at this point…"

"He's totally deaf?" Leo asked quickly.

The doctor looked upward at Leo grimly and nodded, "But, like I said, with a combination of surgeries and hearing aids, he'll be able to have at least sixty percent of his hearing by the age of five."

"Five…" Leo shook his head and repeated. "…Five…"

"I think it'd still be wise to work with sign language when speaking to him," the doctor continued. "I can set you both up with classes as soon as possible."

Max rubbed his chin worriedly and continued to look downward at the floor; Dako was with Lupin and Fujiko at their home in France… More than likely his parents now knew of the news…. He barely listened to the doctor; he knew he'd leave that up to Leo.

Max's wandering mind crashed back to earth as he heard Leo say confidently, "…Then I'll quit."

"Quit what?" Max asked, looking upward at Leo with wide-eyed wonder as to what the hell his partner was talking about.

"Interpol," Leo replied. "I'll stay home with Avery. Maybe… Maybe we could even relocate to California. Dako would like America more, anyway, and most of the surgeons who would work on him would be in the U.S."

Max tapped his fingers on the chair and realized this would mean a huge swallowing of his pride… This would also mean potential run-ins with people he had gone to accounting school and the Rabbinical school with, and even meetings with the Inu Gang.

"Okay…" Max nodded.

Japan:

"So… He's holding your leader's daughter hostage, so you're working with him to kill Yukiko and Toshiro?" Fuji concluded as she took another sip of her tea.

"Yes," answered the young man, a Fuma ninja Katsushiro. "It isn't anything personal against them… Our hands are just tied… And if you can steal the stars from the sky, as they say you can, you can certainly return her to us."

"Well, I don't know about stars… But if it'll keep you guys from killing two of my best fighters, then I'm game," Fuji smiled a smile at the young man that sent Heiji immediately into a quiet seethe. He worked away with his electronics in order to busy himself while they talked in order to do away with the urge he had to strangle Katsushiro.

"I'm going to go grab some coffee downstairs," Heiji closed his laptop, removed his earphones and walked out of the hotel room, trying his best not to slam the door behind him. That didn't stop him from kicking a trashcan outside of the room down the hall, however.

"He's your husband?" Katsushiro inquired.

"Ummm…. Well, we're dating…. Well, I hope we still are…" Fuji answered worriedly. She had heard the trashcan hit the wall, as did Odori, who followed the noise and met Heiji down at the café in the hotel.

She ordered green tea and seated herself in front of her brother, "…Care to talk?"

"Not in the least," Heiji replied darkly.

"Fine by me," Odori took a sip of her tea and simply waited.

"God, that… I can't believe her!" Heiji slammed down his teacup and placed a hand on his forehead. "You should've seen the eyes she gave him! I thought I was going to puke on my laptop!"

"Fuji found someone, I take it?" Odori asked as she set her teacup down.

"Yeah… I've had enough of her doing that sort of crap… After this heist, I'm out. I don't know why I'm still here, anyway. I don't even really like a lot of the people here, that or I don't even have any emotional attachment…"

"Wow, you really are the Fujiko character…" Odori murmured to herself. Heiji rose and shook his head, and stormed off. Odori knew that he hadn't meant a lot of what he had said; something had simply upset him. It was a no-brainer that Fuji would be hard to love, and Odori wondered if Heiji was honestly strong enough to take the abuse on his heart.

Heiji, meanwhile, had walked back up into his and Fuji's room, and gave a look that could turn even the hottest water into ice upon impact as he spied Fuji. The ninja had left, but Fuji was still going over schematics which she and Katsuhiro had drawn up together while Heiji had gone to brood in the café.

"Umm… Heiji?" Fuji quietly rose and approached him, placing a hand on his shoulder. Heiji quickly brushed her off and tried to concentrate upon his work. "Heiji…"

"What do you want?" Heiji asked in the nicest voice he could possibly muster at the moment.

"Katsushiro left… I thought we could get to talking about what happened… Back there…"

"Did you plan it? Do you have a couple of guys on the side or something?"

"Excuse me!" a stunned Fuji yelped.

"Was he like a little guy you've got? A puppet or something?"

"Hey! I've been doing so good about staying in a single relationship!" snapped Fuji, angered by Heiji's accusation of infidelity. In reality, Fuji actually had been trying extremely hard to stay with one person in a serious relationship… Or as serious as she could manage.

"Yeah, yeah… Why'd you say no? Could I at least get a reason?" asked Heiji, looking up from his computer screen at her.

"Well, I…. Hrm… How do I go about this?"

"You could start with the reason."

"I, it's a bunch of things you wouldn't understand!"

"Try me."

"Well, I—"

"Fuji, I really do want a serious relationship with you. I may be mad at you and think you're awful at committing, but damn it I love you and I need to know if you love me, too."

"I… Eh…."

"I want to start a family with you, all right? How bad is that to want?"

"I can't have a family."

"Want, your stupid career again?"

"No, more like blockages in my friggin' tubes, jackass," Fuji snapped angrily.

"What? You can't have them at all?"

"I have about a five-percent chance of getting pregnant," Fuji explained. "And you're right. I should've told you before. I shouldn't have hid that from you."

"…You think I'm that damn shallow?" Heiji blinked a few times in shock.

"I… Listen, it's not exactly easy for me, okay?" Fuji shouted. "It's not like I didn't want to tell you—I was just scared!"

Heiji stood there silently a few moments, and sighed as he turned around, "Maybe it'd be for the best if…"

"Best if what?" Fuji asked worriedly. She watched Heiji begin to pack his things, and the reality of it came crashing down onto her. "H-Heiji? Don't do anything stupid, okay?"

"Don't worry… This is the smartest thing I've done in a while…" Heiji finished his packing his electronic equipment, and then went to working on packing his clothing. "You can keep the ring; I don't need it."

"You… You aren't going to do this," Fuji sputtered, shaking her head. "Heiji, we can work something out…"

"Fuji, sometimes people can love one another and not be meant for one another. We're a terrific example," Heiji zipped up his suitcase and pulled it up onto its wheels. "I'm goin' home…"

"Damn it, you are home!" Fuji shouted loud enough to wake up Toshiro and Yukiko, who were in the room next to them.

"I want more than this," Heiji spat at Fuji, and with that slammed open the hotel room door, picked up his suitcases and walked down the hall, turning the corner and then getting into the elevator. Fuji threw her jacket down on the ground and then broke out into a run.

"Damn it, I don't believe this…" Fuji kicked off her heels in order to try to catch up to the elevator. Too late, though. It closed on her. Fuji slammed her fist against the metallic door, paused, and then punched it a few more times, cursing loudly. The Lupin group had gathered behind her, or what was left of it. Many were stunned at Fuji's tantrum; she had always given off a cool, calm and confident personality, and now she was shrieking at the elevator.

Ally took a few steps forward and placed Fuji's jacket upon her shoulders. Fuji spun around and embraced Jigen tightly.

France:

"So Heiji left Fuji?" a stunned Leo repeated into the phone. Fujiko reconfirmed this, and Leo sighed heavily as he finished dressing Avery. Max had gone out with Dako that afternoon, leaving Leo with his son and his work.

"Please tell me you're doing better… I need some good news…" Fuji begged. "I go to Japan for a vacation, and I have Fuji on the phone in tears…. Leaves little time for any real fun."

"Um… I wish I could," Leo lifted up Avery and walked him to his crib. "I really think Max is going to crack any time now… Fortunately it'll probably only be at me. I don't want him to go getting angry at Dako or Ave for no reason."

"Why do you say that?" asked Fujiko intently.

"It's…. It's too much for him, and you know a lot of his family's not all there… I'm thinking he's going to lose it," Leo responded. "I don't want that to happen, but I'm starting to think the only reason he hasn't asked for a divorce is because of Avery."

"What?" Fujiko gasped, "A divorce!"

"I know, I know… But I work so much, and I'm taking care of the kids with him… Max doesn't like kids that much and he likes attention, if you catch my drift. Damn it, I'm making him sound like this total bastard, but he's not. I know he loves, me, otherwise he wouldn't put up with me like he does… I just don't know what to do anymore, Mom. It's becoming this total mess! Sometimes I just wish I'd never slept wit him…."

"You and your father both…" Fujiko gave a heavy sigh and secretly craved a cigarette at that moment. "I think you two just need some time to work things out… Well, your sister's on the other line, so I think I'll take this now… Ari, take my advice and just schedule a little you and him time…. Even a half hour works wonders."

"Okay… Have a good night, Mom," Leo hung up the phone, and looked downward at Avery. "You're so lucky you don't understand any of this right now, Ave…"

Tokyo:

"How's she doing?" asked Odori as Ally walked into the room where the rest of the Lupin gang had gather, aside from Fuji, who was still in her room.

"Eh, well… She puts up a good front…." responded Ally, scratching the back of his head.

"Hey, guys! I thought through four plans on how to get that girl back and get us out of trouble!" Fuji shouted, kicking the hotel door open and walking through with a large stack of paperwork in her arms. She dropped it on the table of the hotel room and smiled as she looked down at her work.

Ryo took one of the drawn-out diagrams and scratched the back of her head, "Where in the hell do you suggest we find a rubber band this big, Fuji?"

"Eh, I dunno…. I don't usually do the ordering," Fuji admitted. "B-But I can! I'll do it without that little rat bastard! I hope he chokes on a pineapple, or surfs through a patch of jellyfish…. Yeah, jellyfish! We could use those… But where would I get the pickup truck? Well, I'll just figure that out, too!"

"Toshiro, I need to talk to you. We're takin' a walk," said Yukiko grabbing her fedora and placing it upon her head.

"Um, yeah, sure…" Toshiro nodded and rose from his seat, extremely happy to have an excuse to get away from Fuji and her numerous crazed plans. "I never realized it before, but Lupin did a lot of crazy stuff like that before he finally got together with Fujiko…" Toshiro muttered to Yukiko as he walked out of the hotel room, Yukiko at his side. He stopped and looked over at Yukiko, and lifted up her fedora, "….Are you wearing makeup? And why do you have a camera?"

"It'll explain itself in a few…" Yukiko pressed the button for the elevator and waited. Toshiro now noticed a small suitcase at her side. Now he was extremely suspicious of Yukiko.

"What's going on? My birthday was in May…" Toshiro muttered as he looked downward at the suitcase.

"Ha ha…." Yukiko stepped out onto the ground floor and led Toshiro to two bathrooms beside a small convention room. She opened the suitcase and pulled out a bag from her suitcase. "Go put this on…"

"What is it?" Toshiro inquired.

"Just do it…"

"Okay… But if it's like a French maid outfit or something, forget it!" Toshiro replied as he walked into the men's bathroom and waited until he was in a stall to open the package. He pulled out the black coat, and then the gray kimono, and a wave of realization came over him, "This is…. Is this like a joke?"

Ishikawa put on the outfit anyway, and was taken back as he watched Yukiko exit in a white dress, complete with a veil, "How'd you even hide that in that suitcase!" Toshiro asked in awe.

"It was little less than easy getting Goemon to lend me the outfit for you… I still think he's suspicious…" Yukiko replied as she adjusted the collar of his kimono and smiled. "Well, might as well get this done with before that guy gets to me, right?"

"Shouldn't we invite the others down?" asked Toshiro.

"I was hoping Heiji would show, too…" Yukiko sighed heavily, "Guess I can't ask for everything…"

"'Scuse us, Ma'am, we're here to set up for the wedding…" a older man walked past the two, two more men walking behind him.

"Nice to see you showed, Lupin… I take it Goemon told you, and then it spread like wildfire." Yukiko smiled and looked back at the thief. Lupin smiled and pulled off his mask, and soon Goemon and Jigen did the same thing.

"Heh, ya caught me… You know, it isn't everyday a girl asks for a men's wedding kimono… I just asked the hotel a few simple questions, and then I took the liberty of sending out invitations and plane tickets."

Jigen embraced his daughter and kissed her on the cheek, and then laid a hand on her stomach. Yukiko sputtered a few times in shock, and Jigen laughed a little and embraced her once more.

Goemon looked over at Toshiro and cleared his throat, "You know I'm not big on hugging…"

"Eh, it's okay, I am," Toshiro embraced his stunned father tightly. "I ain't gonna kiss you, though, Dad. Hope you don't mind, but I don't see how Mom manages."

"Your other mother's here, too," said Goemon lowly.

"Yeah, we have the womenfolk and Zenigata inside," Lupin pointed over his shoulder at the room behind him. "We also managed to detain Heiji for a little while… And we cleaned him up, some, too."

"Well, I guess it'd be a good time to go let everyone else know…" Yukiko sighed. "So much for a secret, huh?"

"Eh, I already had room service tell them," replied Lupin with a smile. He bent down and kissed Yukiko on the hand and looked upward at her in a smile. "Well, here's to my prettiest bodyguard, by far…. Sorry, Jigen."

"You never tell me I'm pretty anymore," Jigen muttered, and folded his arm. He came down hard on Toshiro's back, patting the young samurai, and looked upward at him from beneath the brim of his fedora, "It's a good thing I'm seeing you at the wedding, Toshiro, because if you two weren't, I'd be kicking your ass all the way to New York. I'm not going to let my girl be an unwed mother!"

"You're pregnant?" Goemon blinked a few times in surprise, and looked to Yukiko, and then to Toshiro with a scowl. Toshiro gave a nervous laugh and cleared his throat in response.

"Hey, you!" Ryo shouted to Yukiko as she walked down with the others, who had all dressed up for the occasion. A stunned Lupin blinked a few times in surprise at the site of Victor next to Ryo, and Victor in turn cleared his throat and looked away from his uncle. Ryo smiled and laughed as she looked at her sister and adjusted her veil, "I'm surprised you're not wearing the suit…"

"Could we get this show on the road? Goemon's got nine impatient kids in there and Jigen's twins are terrorizing them," Lupin said with an uneasy smile. The Lupin gang nodded, and Goemon and Jigen walked in, followed by the others. Fuji was the last to enter, her hands behind her back and her smiling expression faltering. Lupin wrapped an arm over her shoulders and sighed.

"You okay, Princess?" asked Lupin as Fuji leaned against her father.

"I've been better, Dad," Fuji replied as she entered with her father.

"Well, space was tight, so there's just enough seats here… I hope you don't mind sitting here…" Lupin led her to her seat, and Fuji took a step back as she realized it was next to Heiji. Heiji looked at her briefly, and then forward at the wedding again.

Lupin seated his daughter next to Heiji, and then left to his seat in the front of the room.

"Ally!" Toshiro shouted to Jigen, "What in the hell do you think you're doing?"

"Sitting and watching you take my sister from me," Ally responded darkly.

"Get your ass up here! I need a best man, and you're the best for the job I can think of," Toshiro smiled. Ally blinked a few times, stunned, and rose from his seat. Heiji smiled in amusement at this; he had known Toshiro had wanted him, but he was still reeling from his own loss.

At the thought of loss, he looked over at Fuji, who was staring straight ahead at the wedding, "…I don't want to fight here…" said Fuji quietly.

"Guess we aren't going to be talking an awful lot, then," Heiji muttered.

The procession began without the two saying another word to one another; the priest had waited patiently for the two, and Toshiro smiled as he watched Jigen lead Yukiko down and then stand there a few moments and then seat himself next to Ming.

"I get her, I fight and fight to keep her, and I still lose her," Jigen sighed quietly to his wife.

"Well, better to Toshiro than half the other guys she's liked," Ming replied, patting Jigen on the hand. Jigen looked across the way at Sakura, who had flown in only about an hour ago, and smiled at her. He was in love with Ming, but he still adored Sakura, and was grateful for what she had given him.

"I never thought I'd get invited to a surprise wedding and it'd be mine…" Toshiro said to Yukiko as she stood in front of him, the priest reading aloud the rights that no one really paid attention to. "Yukiko Ishikawa…. Has a nice ring."

"So does Toshiro Jigen…." Yukiko answered with a chuckle. Toshiro rolled his eyes, and then came the part of the vows, and both repeated them aloud, and then exchanged rings. Toshiro leaned down and kissed Yukiko, and the small children in the room giggled.

"This is the most normal wedding I've been to in thirty years… And that includes mine," Lupin muttered. Fujiko pinched him, and he yelled a little in response, and that chuckled. "What do you say to renewing our vows, Fujicakes?

"Only if I get a new ring," replied Fujiko.

"Yeesh… You never change…" Lupin grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest. Fujiko kissed him on the cheek and laughed.

Toshiro and Yukiko began to walk back down, and Toshiro gave a questioning look as he heard instead of the traditional wedding march the overture from _Funny Girl_.

"It was the only CD we had to play!" Natasha shouted as she noted Toshiro's confused expression.

Yukiko laughed and threw the bouquet over her shoulder. Ryo tried not to scream out in horror as it landed on her lap. Victor looked over at her, lifted up the bouquet and smiled.

"Here, Fuji, you take it!" Ryo shouted, throwing it at Fuji and then scooting away from Victor.

"Well, I better get going, too…" Heiji sighed, rising.

"Wait, Heiji—I'm sorry," said Fuji, grabbing onto one of his hands to keep him from leaving.

"Listen… I just need some time to think…" Heiji sighed. "If there's anything you need, just call me, Fuji…"

"Well, I don't think you can give me the one thing I need…."

"Maturity? Nah, not really," Heiji filed out of the small room, leaving Fuji with the bouquet.

"Hey, reception at Goemon's!" Lupin shouted.

"I didn't agree to that!" Goemon yelped in response. He clutched onto his chest, and Amaya immediately grew worriedly.

"Is it your heart?" Amaya gasped, taking hold of one of Goemon's hand.

"No, my dagger… Lupin shall pay…" Goemon removed a blade from his kimono and let go of Amaya's hold on him, "Oh, Lupin… I've got something for you."

"Really?" the thief turned his head back around, "What is—Jesus, Goemon put that down!"

"You goin' to that afterparty?" Ally asked as he walked to Fuji, the only other person left in the room besides the priest.

"Nah… Reminds me too much of my own problems. You?"

"Nope. Reminds me too much of my own shortcomings. Want to grab a drink?" asked Ally.

"Sounds great," Fuji rose from her seat and walked out of the makeshift chapel together.

France:

"Hrm?" Max blinked a few times as he walked in and saw a floral arrangement on the livingroom table, "Dako, did you get a boyfriend?"

"I so wish," Dako snorted as she set down her purse on the coat rack, "I'm going to go rot my brains on television…"

Yeah, check on Avery, too…" Max muttered.

"This'll be cool—We'll be able to call people rude stuff by signing…" Dako said to herself with a smile.

"Ha ha… I think not," replied Max as he walked over to the floral arrangement and pulled off the note. He raised an eyebrow as he read over the message and walked into his bedroom. Leo was hunched over his desk, studying. Max tapped him on the shoulder, and the surprised Lupin looked upward and removed his glasses. "What's up with this?" Max asked, holding up the note.

"I thought it'd be a nice surprise…" Leo replied with a shrug.

"It… It is…" Max blinked a few times in surprise as he looked down at the note once again. "You've never done anything like this before…"

"Well, I'll try more, if you want," Leo smiled and looked upward at Max. "I ordered dinner, too, so you don't have to cook…"

"Okay, what's up?" Max inquired, setting down the note on Leo's desk. Lupin seated himself upon his desk to look Max in the eyes, and swung his feet back and forth a little.

"I just wanted to thank you for going along with everything… I know it's been a lot of stress on you, and you've given up a lot."

"Um, wow…" Max leaned forward, and kissed Leo, and Lupin smiled in response. "Have I really been acting that cold recently?

"Eh, yeah, just a little," Leo chuckled. "I was afraid you were going to leave me."

"Hm, I may yell a lot and even say some pretty hurtful crap to you, but I don't want to leave you. I worked too hard for you," Max took hold of Leo's hand and sighed. "I don't know what in the hell's going to happen with us, or with the kids, or with work, but we'll figure out something. We always do… Even if we end up taking them with us and you tutor Dako while I go out and chase down Lupin…."

Leo thought a moment, and a smile came upon his face, "You… You know, she always has wanted to travel…"

"I was joking…." Max said with a slight tone of worry.

"Well, they can't do surgery on Avery until he's at least a year old, currently. But they can fit him with hearing aids until then, so he'll be able to have some sense of hearing… What a great learning experience that would be for a kid! I, I mean I traveled all around with my parents as a kid, and I had a blast, plus that's where I picked up a lot of languages!"

"But what about friends?" asked Max with a sigh.

Leo shrugged, "That's what the Internet's for. Besides, Dako isn't exactly making friends here. Maybe we could at least try it…"

"Well, I suppose… We still get the two-bedroom hotels anyway, even though we only take up one… The first sign of trouble, though, we move, settle down and put them both in normal schools. I'm only doing this because you traveled around, like you said, and I didn't, and out of the two of us you're the more stable one."

"Okay, I promise…" Leo embraced him, "I hope she doesn't mind…"

"Could we go to Australia?" Dako opened the door to Max and Leo's room even more and walked in. "I always liked koalas."

"It makes me wonder what else you sneak in on…" said Max with a glare.

"Nothing that isn't laughable in the least," Dako answered with a smug smirk.

Leo gripped onto Max's shirt as he lunged for Dako, and then looked downward at her sternly, "Dako, how did you get past the door? I could've sworn that I locked it."

Dako blinked and thought for a few seconds before concocting a believable enough lie. Leo would've killed her if he had found out that she had picked the lock, "I guess you didn't, because it was open… Maybe you were too stressed to tell…"

"Hrm, yeah… That makes sense…."

Dako smiled, believing that she had gotten away with the lie, but Leo still had his suspicions over the incident.

Japan, the next day:

"Oh, my head!" Fuji moaned and gripped onto her forehead. She opened her eyes and saw a wine bottle on her nightstand… She had remembered it being full and unopened the night before… But that was about all she remembered about the night before.

"What the…" she reached to the floor, and pulled up a tie, "….Heh heh…. All right… Looks like I've still got it! I don't need friggin' Heiji, anyway… Wonder which bellboy I brought up with me… Oh, maybe it was that cute piano player in the lobby! A girl can hope, a girl can hope…"

She sat up in bed and saw a figure snoring beneath a blanket next to her. "Maybe I should order breakfast… Nah… Heh, I just hope it isn't some kind of ugly bastard… Wakey wak—Oh, damn…."

She pulled away the covers, and watched Ally continue to snore lightly. Fuji then opened her dresser drawer, and swallowed two Tylenol whole, without any sort of liquid.


	23. Tempted by the Fruit of Another

DISCLAIMER: I don't own _Lupin_, and not even _Doraemon-_chan could help me with that problem (If you get that joke then you've really been watching anime too long).

Heh, miss me?

Sorry that this is so… Wow, yeah, it really has been a while. School's started up and my schedule is… Oi, let's just say I've been running all over the place trying to sort things out. I'm also still reeling from the expense of it all. Anyhow, I finally managed to pull out another chapter and hopefully my imagination won't revert back into the desert that it had become a few weeks ago. Please enjoy, sorry about the wait, as always.

Fun Fact of Boredom: Want to see a picture of a character you like? Just curious to see exactly what some of the characters look like? E-mail me—My address is viewable from my profile.

Chapter Twenty-Three: Tempted by the Fruit of Another

"Maybe I can just sneak out without him knowing…" Fuji said to herself as she rose out of bed and began to search for her things. She managed to locate everything, save for one of her heels. It was around that time that Fuji became aware of an odd noise coming from above her. She looked upward and saw her heel, flying along with the fan.

"How in the hell does that even happen?" she muttered. Fuji shook her head, and pulled over a desk chair, and stood on her tip-toes in an attempt to grab her heel. She didn't think to turn on the fan, and grabbed onto the paddle instead. She found her heel, but she also went flying in the direction of the bed, landing face-first on Ally. This of course awoke Jigen, and he looked down at his chest, stunned, as Fuji lifted her head.

"Eh hee hee… Hey there, Ally-chan!" Fuji sat up across from him and smiled, "Eh, how are you doing?"

"….Where are my pants?" asked Ally after he had lifted the sheets and then looked at Fuji once again.

"Ummm…. Not sure…" Fuji admitted. She took up and put on her shoe, and began to look about the room, trying to hide her apprehension. Ally gathered the sheets about him and walked into the bathroom.

"…Well, I found my shoes…" Jigen muttered as he fished them out of the full bath tub. "This is your room, Fuji… What am I doing here?"

"You must've sleepwalked!" Fuji called as she continued to find Jigen's belongings. She opened his wallet briefly and cursed as she found no money, and added this to his pile of other things, which she carried over one arm.

Ally sighed and washed his face off, and stopped dead in the mirror, "What the…?" he tilted his head to a neck and looked at the bite marks. He ran out of the bathroom, nearly tumbling over his sheets, "Did we—?"

"I… Um… Yeah…." Fuji nodded, and set his things on her dresser. "Ally, I—"

"Just stay away!" Ally said warningly to her as she approached him to comfort him. "Oh my God, I hope no one got any pictures of this…"

"I won't tell if you won't…" said Fuji in an attempt to calm him.

"Yeah, but there's the whole thing of my conscience…" Ally replied.

"Come on, like you've never woken up on the weird side of the bed?" Fuji laughed weakly.

"No, never…."

"Hrm?"

"Fuji, I've never slept with anyone! Well, now I have… But I hadn't before last night…"

"You were… You mean I did a virgin and I can't even remember it?" Fuji asked aloud angrily, "Damn it! Oh, Ally… Don't get upset…"

"I've got to call Carmen, tell her the wedding's off…. She doesn't deserve a two-timing jerk…" Ally rubbed his eyes and began to search around for a phone.

"We'll cover it up!" Fuji suggested with a smile, "It'll be easy! I've done this before!"

"How do you suggest these?" Ally inquired, pointing to his bruised neck, "Vampires?"

"Squirrels," Fuji shrugged. "But the scratch marks are going to…"

"The _what_!"

"Don't go freaking on me, Ally…" Fuji sighed tiredly. "Just don't take off your shirt for a week or two… They'll heal… As for the neck, I, um… Here…" she fished through her purse and passed him a small bottle, "Foundation ought to do the trick… Used to work when I was younger."

"I don't believe this…" Ally seated himself on the edge of the bed and placed a hand on his head. "I… I can't live with myself like this…"

Fuji sighed, smiled warmly at him and seated herself next to him, "It's okay, trust me… I'm sure it was all my fault, anyway… See, I brought the booze!" she held up the empty bottle and tossed in aside. "Point being, no one has to know about this… I won't tell—You have my word… I'll even pinky swear to it, and I never break those!"

"Heh, yeah, it's okay…" Ally waved her hand away and sighed, "I never figured me, of all people… I always thought you were going to end up like banging Toshiro!"

"Eh, yeah, go figure he's the only guy in the group who I haven't slept with… Besides Ari."

"What about Max?"

"That's what I like to call 'my little gray area'. Ryo-san'll kill me if she finds out about this… A part of me wishes it were even her before it was you. We even agreed that if we're both single by the time we're fifty we'll just go up to Canada and get married… Mom and Dad will just have to deal."

"You two… Think that about one another? Wait—You're bi?"

"_Helllllll_ no! I am a one way street—A very open, but straight street! But if I'm fifty, by that time there's not really a good chance of me finding anyone at that point, so I might as well just spend the rest of my life with my best friend, right?"

"Makes sense… But Heiji's one of my best friends, and I wouldn't do… That… With a ten foot pole!" Ally yelped.

Fuji smiled and patted him on the back, "It'll be okay, Buddy. We'll be laughing at this years from now when I'm visiting the twenty kids you and Carmen are probably going to have."

Ally shuddered at the thought, and then looked up at Fuji with a sense of relief, "Yeah... This'll be like how your dad and Natasha don't tell anyone that they slept together! Just like that!"

"I wasn't aware of that and I just vomited a little in my mouth," Fuji said with disgust. She rose and stretched, and turned back to look at him. "I'm going to go get breakfast and check in on Mr. and Mrs. Ishikawa! Seeya!"

"Yeah…" Ally nodded. He looked down at the bottle, and shook his head as he laid his eyes upon his engagement ring, which he still wore, "She'd never forgive me…"

Yukiko and Toshiro's room:

"That's one hell of a wedding gift… Usually fathers give their daughters China or something instead of weaponry…" Toshiro set aside the top of the box and looked downward at the shiny new gun.

"Hey, he got you something, too!" Yukiko answered with a laugh, "What'd he give you, anyway?"

"Cigarettes… He said if your pregnancy was anything like Ming's, I'd need a ton of them… He bought me like ten cartons… Oh, and a lighter… It's a nice one, too."

"Yeah, Dad still has good taste in cigarettes, even if he hasn't bought any for himself in years…" Yukiko flipped open the lighter, studied the flame and then tossed it back to Toshiro. "Heh, you have fun with those…"

"Oh I will…" Toshiro laughed and placed the lighter in his gi, "We ought to be hearing more from the Fuma Clan today…"

"Yeah, keep me out of it; I have this thing about people who try to kill me," said Yukiko curtly.

"I've tried to kill you before…"

"Either in a joking manner or while you were under the spell of something… Hey, what do you want to call it if it's a girl?"

"Ummm… I haven't really thought about names yet… I'm not very good at them, honestly. It took me a month to come up with my daughter's name last time—Amanda. It's two letters away from her grandmother's…. We could always name her Haru…"

"After you biological mom? You want to be banished to the couch forever?"

"Heh, no, not really… Well, we'll think of something, I'm sure," Toshiro shrugged and laid down on the couch. "Right now, I'm going to do my best to get some rest before I deal with the headache known as yet another Goddamn clan!"

"Heh… This is why you should take a hint from my dad and run from any and all big-time crime syndicates," Yukiko tossed him a pillow as she passed by and went to looking through some of the other wedding gifts which she'd have to send to their house in New York later that day.

A Shopping District of Tokyo:

Ally looked at his reflection in the glass of the shop, and quickly turned away once again. He couldn't stand to look at himself at the current moment. It seemed as though Ryo wasn't the only suicidal Jigen anymore. He grumbled to himself and walked into a small tavern; it was never a better time to take up drinking.

He seated himself at a bar table and ordered from the attractive young waitress, Ally hardly able to look her in the eyes. She had a face similar to Carmen's; very innocent, very trusting. He wondered what exactly she was doing in a place like a bar.

"You're an American, aren't you?" Ally heard behind him. Jigen balled one of his fists beneath his table and barely looked about to face the voice behind him.

"What's it to you?"

"You were with Lupin the Fourth last night?"

"What, do I look like that kind of guy?" Ally asked with a small smirk. He had inherited his father's smartass gene, and it kicked in every now and again.

"Your fiancée would be rather upset to see these," Ally's attention was drawn to an envelope, and Jigen quickly turned his head and was face-to-face with an all-too-recognizable man. It was the same man Toshiro had tried to kill at the martial arts tournament… It was the same man who had killed Julia and Toshiro's unborn child… It was the man who now wanted his sister and her baby dead.

"Blackmail, huh? I figured something a little more showy…" Ally admitted.

"Here, take this…. I have more copies at where I'm staying, so even if you destroy those there'll be more where that came from… If you don't cooperate with me, your little Carmen will receive a very upsetting package in the mail…" the ninja rose, smiled at the outraged Ally once more, and then made an exit from the bar, not bothering to tip the waitress.

"Let's see what I did here…" Ally said to himself, unsealing the package and shuffling through the photos. With each picture he grew more and more distressed, until he finally placed the photos back in their envelope. As he was sealing it, he noticed an address on the back, as well as the time. It was only an hour away, Ally realized as he looked upward at a clock in the bar. He quickly left a tip and ran out of the bar.

The area was a large temple on the outskirts of town. Two guards stood in front of a looming red torii lit by torchlight, and Ally was allowed to pass as they got a good look of Jigen's features.

Ally scaled up the stone stairs to the wooden door of the temple, and slowly placed his weight against the door, pushing it open.

It was a large room inside structured like many of the places where fighting scenes took place in the movies Ally watched. He approached, and saw the same ninja he had seen almost an hour ago in the more urban area of Tokyo.

"What do you want from me?" asked Ally, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "How in the hell did you get those pictures, anyway?"

"Oh, I had a new associate do that for me," the ninja smiled.

"Yeah, well I want to meet this friggin' perv!" Ally shouted angrily.

"You already have…" the ninja smiled, and Ally gaped as he watched Heiji emerge from behind one of the large pillars. Heiji wore a scowl, which only deepened as he met with Ally's eyes.

"He… Heiji? What… What are you doing here?" Ally choked, taking a step back toward the wooden doors behind him.

"I'm not the only one who needs to explain something, do I?" Heiji asked him quietly. "How could you do that, Ally? I mean, I liked hardly anybody in that group to begin with… It's easy to say that other than Odori, you were the only person I really trusted… The rest are just a bunch of phonies and liars."

"Heiji, I was drunk, so was she! It didn't mean anything!" Ally sputtered. "A…And what about you? Hooking up with the enemy? They want to kill my sister!"

"Well, you always said I was the Fujiko character," Heiji smirked. Ally lunged forward, and in a surprise move, Heiji gripped onto Jigen's wrist and flipped him. Ally fell back on the mat and looked upward at the ninja and Heiji. The ninja placed a hand over Ally's neck and began to press down while Heiji looked downward motionlessly.

"You're the crazy one, so you'll try anything to defeat us. When we attack, if you try to stop us, not only will we kill your sister and send those photos to the Government of Cagliostro so they'll know exactly what kind of a low worm you are, we'll kill di Cagliostro and her mother, too… We'll let you live, though… We'll let you live with the guilt. Not before we break your legs, though."

The tall ninja moved his foot away from Ally's neck, and Jigen began to gasp for air while his attacker looked downward and smiled. He turned to Heiji, and motioned for him, "Ishikawa, come on… We have a lot of work to do…"

"Right," Heiji looked downward at Ally once more, with a hint of remorse in his eyes, and then followed the ninja out through a set of wooden doors.

Ally sat up on the wooden floor and rubbed his neck, "Well, I can say where I got the bruises now, and… No… I can't tell anyone about this…" Ally slowly rose to his feet, and trudged out, still trying to regain the oxygen he had lost. He placed his hands in his pockets as he had before, and pulled out a note in Heiji's handwriting, "What the…"

France:

Leo stuck out his tongue, and smiled as he watched Avery copy him, "Yay, Avery!" he chuckled and picked up the small baby, and spun him around once. Avery laughed happily in response, and waved his hands in the air.

"We're home!" Max called.

"Great—I just finished feeding him," Leo walked into the living room and began to search through the bags that Max and Dako had carried in.

"So is it true that I'm going to be traveling with you guys now?" Dako asked as she pulled out the new CD Max had bought her and began to undo the wrapping.

"We're going to see how it works," Leo replied. "Did you get my lens cleaner?"

"Damn it, I forgot…" Max sighed.

"No cursing in front of the baby," Leo said sternly.

Max looked upward at Leo and blinked, "I can guarantee you that he didn't hear me curse, Leo."

"You heartless bastard!" Dako gasped, holding the CD and preparing to throw it at Max.

"Dakota Angela Zenigata-Lupin!" Leo said in the same stern voice.

"What? That was so wrong!" snapped Dako. "Just because he can't hear doesn't mean he can't read your lips or understand you! Just like the fact that just because you're a bastard at times you still can manage to get someone to put up with you…."

Max glared at her, and then shifted this glare to Leo, who was chuckling at this comment, "You know, I wanted to send you to boarding school… Not one of the nice ones, either. Ones of those ones you hear about with the nuns and no boys…"

"Oh, you mean that one your parents sent you to?" Dako quickly retorted.

"You know, I'm sure that deep down there, somewhere, you two love one another…" Leo said with a heavy sigh.

"Heh, yeah, start digging and tell me how close you are in a year," Max snorted. Leo rolled his eyes and shook his head; he almost felt like the father of three at times.

"The boss called…" Leo said tiredly to Max. "We have to head out to Japan…"

"Did you tell him about Dako and Ave?"

"I'm having Myra and Nina lie for us and say that they're going…"

"You did something illegal?" Max laughed in disbelief, "You're the same guy who tips anyone who gives you a ticket!"

"I know, I know… But how do you justify taking along your kids with you?"

"Ehhh…. Hey, I'm not gung-ho about this plan, so that's your field, man, not mine!"

"How convenient for you…" Leo looked over at Max tiredly and passed him the baby. "Here, I'm tired… You give him a bath this time."

"What? Le-Leo, c'mon! He bites me!"

"He's just a baby, Max… Don't act like such a sissy…."

"_Zolst__ ligen en drerd _(drop dead)!" Max said with a glare.

"Bei mir bist du shayn…" Leo returned, and kissed Max upon the cheek. Max rolled his eyes, sighed and turned around to Avery.

"He always gets me with that one…" Max muttered as he led Avery into the bathroom and began to run the bathwater for that one, "That's the line I used to win him over, you know…. I'll let you use it on someone nice one day. And unlike my parents I don't care if that somebody pees standing up."

Fuji's Hideout:

Katsushiro sat opposite of Fuji. Both were going over a plan she had concocted to get back his boss' daughter and making changes where necessary. Fuji looked above the paperwork as the door opened and smiled at the sight of Ally, but this quickly faded as he walked quickly past her and into his room.

"Is he all right?" asked Katsushiro, turning to Fuji.

"Yeah, we just had a mild confrontation last night," Fuji replied. "Would you excuse me?"

"Of course," Katsushiro nodded and walked Fuji walk over to Ally's room and press her ear against his door.

"Hello, is Carmen there?" Fuji heard Ally ask in a cracked voice through the wooden door. She figured he would end up telling her, now matter how secret they kept it. "Hey, Baby…. Um, not so good… I screwed up really bad… No, no, I'm fine… Everybody's fine. I just… I love you a lot, and… Some things happened last night that I wish I could take back."

"That damn moron," Fuji hissed, and banged upon the door. "Ally-chan, could I get some help, please?"

"I'll call you back, Carmen," Ally sighed, hung up and opened the door. "What, Fuji?"

"Just wanted to see how you were," Fuji replied with a wide smile.

"No you didn't," Ally snapped. "You were listening to me, weren't you?"

"Just a little," Fuji replied with a smile. "Why in the world would you do something like that, Ally-chan? Didn't we agree this would be a secret?"

"I… Fuji, I met with the guy who's trying to kill Yukiko," said Ally slowly. "He… He's got blackmail against me."

"What?" Fuji blinked, and then seated herself on the bed, never taking her eyes off of Ally. "How did they—"

"You have to promise you won't get angry," Ally continued.

"Umm…. Just spill it out, Ally, you're kind of freaking me out here…"

"Heiji's on their side. He's working with them."

"WHAT?"

"Yeah…. Here, he gave me this. Maybe you can make some sense out of it," Ally removed the slip of paper he had received from Heiji hours ago and passed it to Fuji.

"It's a code," Fuji muttered. "It's a computer code!"

"Figures… Can you make anything out of it?"

"No… But I know someone who's great at deciphering things…. He can even do those Cryptoquotes!"

"Hrm… So, how are you going to trick Ari into doing that?"

"Oh, I have my ways…"

France:

"Fuji, you wouldn't dare!" Leo shrieked into the telephone.

"Yup. You don't help me, and I send out those photos of you playing drunk DDR…."

"Well, I'll send out your fat pictures!" Leo retorted quickly.

"Hrm, you wouldn't do that… Because then I'd cry and you hate it when I cry. Let's face it, Leo, women are your weakness… You're so much like Dad sometimes…"

"They are not! Fine, fax it over!" Leo buried his head in his hands and then rubbed his forehead; he couldn't believe he was once again being blackmailed by his sister. He watched it print out a few moments later, and rolled over to it. He put on his reading glasses and looked over it a few moments before leaning back in his chair, chuckling into the phone, "You… You're kidding, right? This isn't an SVO language, this isn't even SOV…. It's all just BS! This isn't anything in my field, Fuji!"

"But you're a quick learner."

"Fuji, I don't even have _time _for this. I've got two small children, a needy spouse, and a ton of paperwork dating all the way back to the time I was arrested and almost put on death row. Oh, and I still have to develop the photos from my wedding and somehow manage picking up my dry cleaning, too."

"I want doubles of those, by the way. But I really need you to do this for me, Ari."

"Fuji, I wouldn't know where to start, honestly. Computer language isn't like anything else out there. It's math, you get that?"

"And you're good at math!"

"Not that good…"

"Then get Zenigata to do it!"

"Max couldn't count to twenty with his shoes on. I can't help you here."

"Wait… He's Jewish and Asian and he sucks at math?... Who… _What_ did you marry?"

"A very loving and occasionally perverted man."

"Well… If you come up with anything, let me know. This whole thing's turning into one big mess. The Fumas want to kill Yukiko, then they want us to help them, then Heiji goes to the dark side."

"Heiji did what?"

"I've got to go. I'll do some work on it, too," Fuji sighed tiredly. "You just work on it. I have a feeling it's something really important."

"You got it," Leo hung up the phone, and then turned his attention back to his son, who was sleeping upon his chest. "Your aunt is going to drive me crazy yet."

Fuji, meanwhile, walked back to her ninja companion and seated herself next to him, "Sometimes being the queen really sucks, you know that?"

"I wouldn't know," Katsushiro responded. "What's that?"

"A code," Fuji mumbled, sinking down and resting her head upon the table. "You wouldn't get it…"

"Hrm… Looks like one of those things in the paper…" Katsushiro muttered.

"Huh?" Fuji raised her head and blinked a few times, "What things in the paper?"

"Well, I saw your one friend doing one earlier. The one who dresses like a man…."

"…Oh, Yuki-chan!" Fuji bolted out of her chair and ran excitedly to Yukiko's door. An annoyed gunwoman answered the door.

"What?"

"I was wondering if you could do me a teensy, tiny favor?" Fuji put on her best puppy dog expression and waited for Yukiko's answer.

"Fine. It better not be too big, though. I'm in the middle of something," Yukiko snapped as Fuji handed the paper to her, and she looked it over a few moments. "Be at the local mall at eight. Be in front of the fountain. Wear something nice. Heiji."

"How… How did you…?"

"You take the number to the right and subtract it to the one of the left, and you use that letter. If you get twenty-five, it's a space. What, you've never played it?"

"No, I have a life."

"Heh, well, here you go, princess. I've got a paranoid samurai to worry about."

"You kids have a good time, now. Don't do anything too strenuous, you could hurt Goemon the fifteenth."

Yukiko slammed the door in Fuji's face, and Fuji walked away chuckling. She stopped when she heard a scream, however, drew her gun and quickly busted down the door. Toshiro had been knocked out cold, and a window was broken.

"I heard a scream—What happened?" Ryo also ran out with her weapon, as did Victor, Odori and Ally.

"They took Yukiko, and…. Ow… Toshiro's bleeding, someone get me a warm towel!" Fuji demanded, bending down in front of him.

"I'll look after him, you all go get the people who took her," Victor quickly walked into the room and removed Toshiro's gi belt and wiping the blood away from his head. "Odori, you may leave Namiko with me. I won't harm her."

"Victor, if you lay one hand on her—" Odori began in a warning tone.

"Dori, don't worry, he won't," Ryo answered, looking down at Lupin and pausing. "He'll keep his word for me."

Odori nodded sternly, and passed the baby she carried in her arms to Victor, who took her and set her down on the floor next to him.

"Let's get going," Fuji placed several clips in her purse, and began a sprint down the stairs with the others following close behind.

"You have any idea where they'll be?" asked Odori, who was the first to reach their car.

"I have a few clues," Fuji answered, hopping into the car and right onto Ally's lap. She paused a for a moment, blinked ,and then climbed into the front seat beside Ryo, who had already started up the car. Fuji fell forward, her high heels in the air, as she climbed forward, for Ryo had taken off at at least forty miles an hour, zooming through traffic and even a construction site as they caught site of several Fuma ninjas in black van. One threw a small bottle out of the back of the van, which Ryo quickly realized was a Molotov cocktail and swerved out of the wait to avoid. Instead, a fountain exploded, causing a domino effect in traffic which led to more than a few crashing cars.

"Come on, faster!" Fuji shouted.

"I'm going as fast as I possibly can, damn it!" Ryo barked.

"Oh I doubt that!" Fuji placed her own foot atop Ryo's and accelerated the gas. Ryo ran through a kiosk, Ally picked up a fedora as it went flying by, and placed it on his own head.

"I hate using these," Ally stood up on the seat of the car and shot, knocking out one of the windows of the van. He fired several more times, but these were misses.

"Get me next to the vehicle!" Odori demanded.

"If some bitch would get her heel out of my foot I'd gladly do it!" Ryo answered.

"Sorry! Damn it, lighten up," Fuji grumbled, scooting away from Ryo and folding her arms.

The hotel room:

"W… Where am I?... Yukiko!" Toshiro sat up, but almost too quickly, and found himself too weak to stay in this position.

"Fujiko and the others are after her," Victor replied quietly. "Don't worry, she will be returned. I have the fullest faith in all of them."

"Duck," Toshiro muttered.

"Hrm?"

"Duck, damn it!" Toshiro grabbed Victor by the jacket and quickly moved him out of the way, just in time to dodge Katsushiro's blade.

Victor then ran and took hold of Namiko, but not before falling victim to a second swing of the sword, and he tumbled down, gripping onto his arm.

"The Fuma Clan has a strict policy about what happens when we meet Lupins. We kill them," Katsushiro placed his blade on Victor's shoulder and then ran the cold blade against the flesh of his neck.

"You were a spy," Victor chuckled and shook his head. "Of course. There's no daughter, is there?"

"No, there isn't. But hopefully for you there's an afterlife," said Katsushiro with a wicked smile. "I'm going to make it look like a murder-suicide… Lupin kills small child and renowned actor. This won't play well. But it'd be just in your style, Victor."

"I've met my reaper, and I'm sorry to inform you that it's not you."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means you should look behind you every once in a while, you son of a bitch!" Toshiro shouted just before digging his blade into Katsushiro. Victor shielded Namiko from the sight of this, as well as the blood, and Toshiro faltered as he went to sheath his sword.

"Are you all right?" asked Victor as he approached Toshiro, taking hold of one of Ishikawa's arms.

"I'll be fine. I just want to save Yukiko."

"You really do love her, don't you?"

"Well, I did marry her. Jigen women are trouble, though… But I think we both know that."

Victor nodded, and helped Toshiro to stand, "Now what?"

"We're going for a ride… You'll have to drive, though. You familiar with Vespas?"

"I'm European, of course."

"Good, 'cause you're driving one," said Toshiro, removing his parted skirt and walking into his bedroom.

"What are you doing? This isn't exactly time for a wardrobe change…."

Toshiro walked back out in a full samurai outfit that bore the chest of the Rat Clan, and adjusted the mask, "I'll need you to find me a Fuma crest."

"Yes, I'll just pull it out of my magic bag."

"No, you're going to steal in for me, Victor," Toshiro shook his head, fighting off his concussion, and they walked out of the hotel room, Victor with Namiko in hand.

The Fuma Clan dojo:

The chase ended with the Fuma ninjas speeding through the gates before they closed, and Ryo barely zooming past the iron wall. The four then hopped out of the vehicle, and looked about. There was no sign of the ninjas… It was dead silent. Ally kept a fighting stance while he looked about tensely, and the three women kept their weapons drawn.

"I see you made it," they heard, and their attention was drawn to the top of the steps, where the very same Rat Clan ninja who had killed Julia years before now stood, Yukiko in his grasp. "Welcome…

"Yuki!" Ryo lunged forward, but was blown back by a ninja, who seemingly appeared out of nowhere and punched Jigen in the stomach—Hard. Fuji growled and looked at the coughing Ryo, and then back up at the ninja.

"Listen, take me. Please? Just let her go," Fuji took a few steps forward and dropped her gun. "I'll make it worth your while, trust me."

"What, it's not enough that you sleep with Daisuke Allen, now you're offering your services to me? I don't do cheap whores," snapped the ninja.

"Ally?" Odori looked over to Jigen, who wore an emotionless expression even with this said.

"Heh, I don't come cheap," Fuji smiled, and placed her hands on her hips. She removed her jacket, tossed it aside, and approached the ninja. Several of his guards went to stop her, but he shooed them away, looking Fuji up and down. "The whore, maybe… But I'm also experienced, and not just between the sheets. I can work for you."

The ninja smiled, chuckled, and then broke out into a wild laugh. "You, help me? HA! You're nothing more than a backstabber!"

"But a cute one," Fuji brushed her fingers through her hair and spoke in the most seductive tone she could muster. "C'mon… What do you say? I'd make a great ninja, and maybe an even better wife."

"No wonder Ishikawa left you," the Rat Clan ninja drew Yukiko's magnum from her hostler and held it up to Lupin, and smiled. "Now die, Lupin."

A shining object when flying through the air and that moment, and knocked the weapon out of his hand. He looked upward, and saw a tall man in complete ninja garb crouched upon a stone wall surrounding the dojo.

"Ishikawa, glad you could make it," he chuckled, and stepped forward, dragging Yukiko along with him. "I was always disappointed you didn't get to see me kill the first one."

"And I won't see you kill this one either, Tohru," Toshiro jumped down and landed in front of him, and drew his blades.

Tohru laughed and his grip around Yukiko's neck tightened, "Try it and I'll open her like a piñata."

"You always were jealous…" Toshiro said darkly. "You tried your best to become the leader of the Rat Clan, but you knew it was going to be me, regardless."

"You don't even deserve to wear that outfit, as far as I'm concerned," Tohru replied. "I worked for years to become the best only to find out the title was going to go to an arrogant little bastard. I even killed for your mother to win her favor, but it wasn't enough! It was all just a ploy to get you to take your so-called rightful seat at the head of the Nezumi Clan. So I took advantage of the Fuma's hatred for Lupin and her associates, and they agreed to help. Katsushiro never got around to killing Lupin, though, I see."

"He tried, but a certain blue-eyed relative of Fuji's helped me defeat him," Toshiro smiled, and lifted his mask over his face. "Now are we going to keep talking or will there actually be some fighting here?"

"As you wish," Tohru threw Yukiko to the ground, and Jigen immediately rose and went to throw a punch at him.

"Yukiko, don't you dare!" Toshiro shouted. "This is my battle!"

"Yes, that's right, be a good little wife…." Tohru chuckled in the livid Yukiko's face. "Women should be subservient, anyway."

"The gods will have no mercy on you," Toshiro narrowed his eyes, and ran toward Tohru. He ran towards the ninja, and Tohru in return jumped and launched several throwing stars at Toshiro. One ran across Ishikawa's face, drawing blood and opening his mask, revealing his mouth. Toshiro again ran toward Tohru, this time managing to cut him with his smaller blade. Tohru clutched onto the wound across his chest, glared at Toshiro and threw out a string of wire. This wrapped itself about Toshiro's wrists, and soon Tohru had the upper hand and stood with a blade to his adversary's neck. When the rest of the gang went to help, they were only met with Tohru's Fuma bodyguards.

Then, there was a whistling sound, a plunging sound, and Tohru let out a cry, and flailed forward, blood coming from his mouth. It was obvious to see what had killed him when he fell to the ground with a thud. Fuji looked at the arrow sticking out of his back, and then up at the wall, just in time to see a small figure hop off of it. Moments later, her cell phone went off and she answered it.

"Hello?"

"I hid bombs all over the place. You have one minute to get out," the voice on the other side answered.

"…Heiji?" No answer. The line had been cut. Fuji looked about, and saw the Fuma Clan ninjas now looking about her with murderous looks in their eyes.

"Guys… I don't want to scare you, but there's a bomb set to go off in thirty seconds," Fuji whispered to Odori, Ally and Yukiko.

"What!" the three shrieked.

"Well, guys, it's been fun, but I've gotta run now," Fuji bent down to pick up her jacket, and the ninjas took this opportunity to attack. She tossed the jacket out, and a net expanded from inside it, covering all of the ninjas and giving the Lupin gang the perfect chance of escape. Yukiko blasted open a new hole in the wall with her magnum, and then ran out to the Vespa. She revved it up and waited for Toshiro to run out, which he did just before the first explosion went off. She took his hand, seated him on the bike behind her and then started it up, although she had never driven one before in her life.

Ryo hopped into the car, and went to take the driver's wheel, but was stunned to see Victor already there, Namiko at his side, chewing upon his watch, which she found fascinating due to its shininess alone.

"You look like Little Red Riding Hood when she found the Big Bad Wolf," Victor chuckled, and started the car up. Another blast went off, and Odori, Ally and Fuji nearly missed the tumbling inferno which had once been a torii. Odori hopped onto the trunk of the car and then seated herself in the back seat, and then Ally climbed in. Fuji climbed in last, her hand inadvertently landing upon Ally's knee. She quickly moved it away as she noted Jigen's expression, and Victor took off, away from the wreckage.

"So… Did you two… Really…?" Odori raised an eyebrow as she looked Ally and Fuji over, and Ally exchanged this puzzled look with one of deep regret.

"I was drunk," Ally replied quietly. "Go ahead and saw that I'm immoral now, you might as well."

"You're remorseful, though. And that is what matters most," Odori replied. "In any event, I am still your friend, Jigen."

"What about me, huh?" Fuji smiled and looked down at Odori hopefully.

"…." Odori looked away, out toward the countryside. Fuji greeted this frown with a roll of the eyes, and leaned back in her seat.

They arrived at the hotel room first, Toshiro and Yukiko following soon after, Toshiro with a few new white hairs after experiencing Yukiko's driving.

"Are you all right? He didn't hurt you, did he?" Toshiro inquired as he helped Yukiko off of the bike.

"Nah, I'll be all right. How about you? You look, um… Really tired," Yukiko chuckled and leaned into him. "Who scared you more, me or Tohru?"

"Your driving. Promise you won't do that again," Toshiro bent down, removed her fedora and kissed her atop the head, and Yukiko sighed and closed her eyes in response.

"…I could really go for a burger," she said quietly.

"What a way to kill a mood," Toshiro laughed, and led her into the hotel, an arm over her shoulders.

"Well, they look happy as ever," Ryo smirked as she watched her sister and brother-in-law walk down the hall and into their room.

Victor stood next to her, his hands in his pockets and leaning against a wall of the hotel, "Hrm. What she sees in him, I'll never know."

"Probably similar to what I see in you, Victor."

"What's that mean?" Victor frowned and blinked, a little unsure how to take this.

"I really owe you something for all of your help," Ryo stood in front of him and took hold of one of his hands.

"Um… Really… Heh heh, like what?" Victor switched in perverted Lupin mode at this point, complete with the Lupinic smile.

"Well, I dunno… Hrm, wait, I've got an idea…"

"Which is…?"

Ryo leaned forward and pecked Victor upon the lips, and then smiled, "There. I think we're eve now."

"You're funny. Now, I was thinking of perhaps a larger payment… Or two…" Victor smiled and placed his hands upon Ryo's shoulders.

"Heh, I hope you weren't talking about what I think you were joking about. I already kissed you and it wasn't forced, so let's just take it slow."

"How slow are we talking, here? I mean, neither of us are getting any younger, really."

"Calm down, Victor. I'm in no hurry to start a family."

"F-family?"

"Yeah…. Didn't you know that?" Ryo raised an eyebrow and smiled, "I want kids. I always have."

"I… Better get going," Victor cleared his throat, and placed his hands in his pockets, beginning the trek back down to the first story of the hotel and out to his car.

"Goodnight, Victor. Thanks again for your help," Ryo chuckled, and then disappeared into her room. Victor gave a tired, heavy sigh, and walked toward the elevator. After waiting a few moments, he opted for the stairs.

Later that night:

Fuji saw him sitting down at a café chair near the water fountain where she had promised to meet him. He had his laptop set up as usual, and there was an ignored cup of coffee in a Styrofoam cup beside the computer.

"You were the one who killed Tohru, weren't you?" Fuji said quietly as she seated herself opposite of Heiji. "Why did you…?"

"To come in at the last minute and play the hero," Heiji replied, never taking his eyes off of his monitor. "Ally'll never forgive me, though."

"So… You saw… What happened, huh?"

"Every second."

"….I'm really sorry, Heiji. I know I can't make up something like that. What I did was awful, and I'm being sincere with my apology," Fuji sighed and placed her hands on her lap, and bowed her head slightly. "Please… Just forgive me. I'm sorry."

Heiji paused, and looked up from his laptop screen before shutting it and moving his chair closer to Fuji. He took her hands in his and lifted them up. "I have a problem with forgiveness, I know. I guess we all have our issues, eh? I'm sorry I blew up at you."

"So you're going to come back?" Fuji's eyes lit up hopefully.

"Nope," Heiji kissed one of her hands and then looked upward at her with a smile. "I've got an even better idea."

"I…. I'm still nervous about the marriage thing, you know that, right?"

"What'd Fujiko sometimes have to do to Lupin in order for them to get what they were after? Even if it was all an act?"

"Stab him… In the back…." Fuji drew back, a little worried at where Heiji was going with this.

"Well, the world still thinks that I'm mad at you," Heiji chuckled a little, and sat back in his chair. "So I've got an idea…."

France, two days later:

"Maternity leave? This is crap!" Leo shouted, tossing down the letter and grumbling beneath his breath.

"Hrm… Well, you're the only man to ever go on it in Interpol's history. Congratulations," said the chief blandly. He then turned his attention to Max, who was even more annoyed by this turn of events. "Zenigata, I hope you know this means a new temporary partner for you."

"If it's a woman I want on traffic duty," said Zenigata with a snap.

"No. Apparently, the ICPO runs in your family," the chief stepped aside, revealing Max's new partner.

"Oh you're kidding me!" Max moaned.

"Inspector Heiji Ishikawa, reporting for duty," said Heiji with a wide smile and a salute.


	24. Honky Tonk Woman

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Lupin, but I did get invited to the Blondie and Dagwood 75th anniversary party… (Heh, gotcha)….

Heya there…

Sorry… Another long wait, but another long chapter as a result. I'm thinking this chapter should be known as the 'relationship' chapter, because, well… Eh, just read on and you'll find out, you'll see what I mean. Anyhow, not much in the way of special messages here; been pretty busy with school, but that's nothing new. Please read and give your opinion and critiques, as always. I so love them… I love them even more than I love old musicals… And that's a LOT!

Fun Fact of Boredom: A character introduced in this chapter is actually from an RP (Yes, I do online RPs… Yes, I'm trying to find out where there's a nearby L.A.R.P. convention… And if you know what L.A.R.P even is your nerd points have gone through the roof) I run with a friend, so he deserves some credit in helping to make this chapter (thanks again, RP Buddy!).

Chapter Twenty Four: Honky Tonk Woman

Armenia:

"I still don't believe this…" Max said with a shake of the head, glaring at his relative once more and then staring at the road ahead of them. He slammed on the brakes as he almost hit a chicken, and Heiji looked up from his laptop briefly and over at Max.

"You think you could try to watch the road?" Heiji asked with a bored sigh.

"You think you could BITE ME?" Max shrieked.

"Hey, Interpol needed to put you with someone you wouldn't end up screwing. You already put their best translator out of work for God knows how long… Have you tried the coffee I picked up yet? Armenia's famous for its coffee."

"It's also the first Christian nation… This of course constituted a visit from the Pope, and therefore he left the country with a gift in the form of a gorgeous Bible which is said to house five missing books of the Bible."

"This must be putting a bee in your bonnet, considering you don't even believe that crap."

"I'm not even really big on the Torah… I'm too busy for G-d and if you look at my life it's pretty damn obvious he's been too busy for me," Max murmured and turned into a small hotel. "I hate Eastern Europe…"

"Heh, and yet you always get drug back here. You ever think about getting your karma checked, Maxie?" Heiji packed away his computer equipment and followed Max out of the vehicle and into the small inn and up the stairs into their room, where there was one bed.

"I'm going to pull a Goemon and take the floor," said Heiji after a pause.

"Watch the rats," Max sighed tiredly, rubbing his eyes.

"Better than you thinking I'm Leo and trying to cuddle," Heiji snapped.

You see, everybody wonders _why_ I stayed in the closet for years. It's because of people like you, Heiji… It's because of people like you. Truth be told, you aren't even my type."

"Well, I feel special now," Heiji smiled and tilted his head to a side. "Why don't you check up on your Missus?"

"I don't trust you… I know you're up to something—You have to be," Max glared at Heiji once more before exiting the hotel room, cell phone in hand.

Heiji chuckled and waited for Zenigata to exit, and then opened his laptop and began to type in a series of numbers. Max, being the math genius he was, would never figure out what he was doing… Heiji smiled as he looked at his handiwork; it looked like a bunch of gibberish, but to someone who actually understood numbers, this was valuable information.

Houston, Texas:

"So he's got him in Armenia?" Fuji laughed wildly and fell back on her bed, clapping happily, "Oh, Heiji-chan you're great!"

"Well, he's halfway right," Yukiko set her pencil and paper aside and placed her fedora back upon her head. "We are after something that's in Armenia… It just happens to have relocated itself in a Texan museum for the time being."

"And soon it'll be in my private vault!" Fuji added with another cheery smile which faded as Odori walked in, recently returning from the airport.

"How'd it go?" Yukiko looked above the brim of her hat at Ishikawa sympathetically.

"I…. I don't want to talk about it!" Odori yelled, and ran to her door. She was quick to cloister herself away from the others in the gang, so no one would see her in the weak position of crying. Odori looked about her room, and saw only her things about them… Almost every sign of Namiko was gone. Almost. Odori still had a few photos and a kimono which Ryo had made the little girl in her spare time. But Odori knew she'd have to send off the kimono when Namiko was old enough, in care of her biological mother.

"I won't even have the right to be known as her mother," Odori placed her forehead upon her knees, and her wailing could be heard through the door. Ally, Ryo and Toshiro, who had just come from lunch, stopped at the door, and all returned saddened glances with the other two members of the Lupin gang.

"Well, she did what was right…." Ryo folded her arms across her chest and sighed. "Poor Dori…"

"Yeah, she loved Namiko. Who could blame her? I mean, hell, I thought of her as my daughter, almost!... I even offered to take care of her for Dori. Carmen really wants kids," Ally added.

"How're you and Carmen doing, on that note?" asked Fuji.

"She still isn't talking to me," Ally answered, placing his hands in his pockets and seating himself in a chair beside Fuji's bed. "….We're all having a crap week, it seems."

"Hrm… I know! We'll go out tonight, all of us!" Fuji snapped her fingers and smiled. "Maybe that'll help Dori-chan a little… I can always steal that tapestry tomorrow. I signed that letter saying I'd steal it at midnight, anyway… I never said midnight of what night!"

"I thought you were going after something from the pope…"

"Heh, you kidding? That's kibble compared to this prize. That tapestry has directions to the lost books of the bible that King James himself had stored away for fear of them leaking out," Fuji smiled and snapped her computer shut. "Come on, guys, let's get a goin'!"

"Who else wants to line dance?" asked Ryo.

"Eh. No one besides your weirdo self," Fuji blinked a few times and then turned back to her closet. "Hmm…. Do I want to go for slutty yet fun or sparkles tonight?"

"Sparkly and slutty," said Ryo after a pause. "That fits you perfectly."

"Hee hee hee… I'm laughing on the inside," Fuji rolled her eyes and shook her head as she pulled out an outfit and studied herself in the mirror a few times. "Hrm… This one makes my hips look huge…"

Paris:

Leo sighed as he felt someone jump upon his bed, and rolled over and narrowed his eyes at Dako, "….Yes?"

"Max called."

"That's nice…."

"He said to tell you that he loves you."

"Good for him. I'm going to go back to sleep now."

"So are you like an at-home mom now?"

Leo sat up in bed and put on his glasses, "I'm an at-home dad…. And this is a temp thing."

"Hm… He made a bunch of food before he left and froze it so we wouldn't starve on your cooking he wanted me to tell you," Dako continued.

"He did what?" Leo grabbed his kimono on the bedpost and draped it over his shoulders, and walked out to the kitchen. Leo yawned and opened the freezer door and looked downward at the numerous plastic containers, "Damn I love him…" Leo muttered as he pulled out one container and found he had even taken care of breakfast.

After thawing out breakfast for himself and Dako and then feeding Avery, Leo dressed himself and then Dako helped him get Avery ready, and then they left to run errands for the day.

"Where are we going to first?" Dako sat next to Leo as they drove down the busy French street ahead of them.

"Well, I've got to see if a book came in for me," Leo replied, looking down at the little girl and then back at his son.

"Hey, I've got a question…. Well, a couple…. Should I call you and Max 'dad'? Wouldn't that be confusing?"

"Do you want to?"

"Sort of… I mean, I hate having to explain the whole story to other kids I hang out with at the Embassy." Dako, of course, was referring to the American embassy, where she played with fellow American children. Fortunately, Leo was a longtime friend of the Ambassador to the U.S. in France.

"If you want to, I'm sure Max won't mind you calling him Dad."

"Well, what am I supposed to call you…. Mom?"

"Ehhhh…. No. How about Papa? That's what I call my dad when I speak to him in French. It's more of a European term, and it's a little weird for you, I know, but, hey… It'd definitely void out any confusion."

"Okay, thanks for clearing all of that up. I want to set an example for Avery, and I don't want to go around calling you guys by your first names."

"Hey, no problem. Thank you for doing that, Dako. Now, what about those other questions?"

"Well… Um… I was talking with some friends… You know, about our parents and stuff…"

"Oh, your friends again?"

"Yeah… Anyway… How do you and Max, um… Dad…?"

"How do we what? Catch the bad guys?" Leo looked over his glasses and smiled. "That's easy, you see, if—"

"No, not that…" Dako glanced at her sneakers and cleared her throat. "How do you know, you know… Do… It?"

"Do what? Do…" Leo screeched his brakes to a halt as a car in front of his stopped and he stuck his fist out the window, "ZUT! Idiote! Regarde! Regarde!... Merde…" He sighed as he began his drive once again and turned to Dako after he checked Avery over to make sure he was all right. The boy had gone into a screaming and crying fit at the sudden stopping of the vehicle, and was still wailing. "I think I know where you're going with that, Dako…"

"Yeah? Thank God… I didn't want to have to explain myself."

"Wouldn't you like me to give you the other talk instead?" Leo asked pleadingly as he made a left turn and stopped at a bookstore. "The one about boys and girls?"

"Nah, I know about that already."

"How?"

"I made Max tell me."

"Max told you about that?" Leo gave a small chuckle at the thought of this; Zenigata had never had a girlfriend, much less relations with one, as far as he knew. "Well, I'll let him explain that to you, too, as soon as he gets home. He knows a lot about that, too."

"Okay… What about two girls then, you know about that?"

"I'll buy you something really nice if you quit asking me this stuff…. Pleaseeeee just stop asking, Dako…."

"You're really uptight for a Lupin. I think that's why you and Max get along so well. He's a lot more lose than you…. But you're a lot easier to talk to. You remind me a lot of my mom."

"At what point did I become the frilly one?" Leo muttered.

"Huh?"

"Nothing…. Let's get Ave and go on inside…"

"I hate these bookstores… They smell like my old grandma's house…"

"Your old grandma?"

"Uh huh—The one I had before Nana and Grandma. Nana and Grandma are better, though. Nana cooks a lot and Grandma takes me shopping all of the time."

"Well, you're a real Lupin woman in that sense, Dako. They all seem to love shopping," Leo chuckled as he unbuckled Avery and stepped into the shop.

Armenia:

"What do you MEAN 'Texas'?" Max shouted into the receiver.

"Zenigata, relax—We'll have you on the first flight out there," the inspector on the other side of the phone sighed heavily. He had grown used to Zenigata's ranting over the past few years; many had. How Leo even put up with him was a popular question around the office.

"Freakin' Texas…" Zenigata slammed down the phone and glared at Heiji. "She isn't in Armenia—She's at an Armenian exhibit."

"…Are you sure I didn't accidentally put in your contacts this morning, Max? I could've sworn I read 'Armenia'."

"That's Inspector Zenigata to you!"

"Please—Inspector Zenigata's your father. You're just some clown walking around in a cheap tweed suit," Heiji smiled and continued to pack his belongings. "You ready?"

"I don't care if I am related to you, I'll still kick your ass the first chance I get," Max gave a glare and put on his jacket, following Heiji out of the small hotel room.

Texas:

"This place looks good…" Fuji looked upward at the shining club sign that stuck out upon the darkened highway.

"It isn't too bad… Not the kind of honky tonks I like, though…" Ryo gave a small sigh and pulled into the dirt parking lot, and stepped out with the others, who had dressed accordingly to the occasion. Even Odori had dressed in an American style, something which shocked many of the gang, although they said nothing to her. There was nothing that could be said to her, really.

"Remember, you stick to Sprite," Toshiro said with a slightly chiding tone to Yukiko.

"Uh-huh…. I have a dad, thank you," Yukiko waved him off as she entered in the darkened club, Toshiro walking beside her with a hand upon her hip protectively.

"I'm hitting the bar," Ryo tilted the cowgirl hat she had worn to the group and then disappeared into the crowd, a sea of hats in her wake. She seated herself at the bar and ordered a bottle for herself, and was more than a little surprised to find that the beer had already been paid for. She looked over to where the bartender pointed, and saw a gentleman in a black hat, jeans and long-sleeved black shirt with Western stitching.

He rose, and Ryo groaned as she managed to get a clear look at his face, "Take a seat, Victor…."

"Funny, us meeting like this," Victor smiled and seated himself beside Ryo.

"Yeah… And not funny ha-ha, either," Ryo took a long swig of her beer and shook her head. "How in the hell do you do this?"

"I'm a Lupin, it's a talent," Victor tilted up his hat and smiled at Ryo. "Are you here with anyone?"

"Just the usual," Ryo shrugged indifferently. "Why do you ask?"

"I wondered if you'd like to join me…. Have you ever been to Mexico?"

"You want me to go out of the country with you? What are you on, Victor?"

"It'll just be for a short time… I have the borders taken care of," Victor rose from his barstool and held out his hand. Ryo stood in her boots and moved away from him, finding Fuji in a corner of the bar talking with several men. Odori sat by herself in a corner of the bar, Yukiko and Ally had taken to playing pool and Toshiro was talking with several people over the bar. He was just glad to be talking with other Americans for a change.

"Fuji, I'm going out for a while. I've got a room key and my cell phone on me, so call me if anything happens."

"Yeah, yeah… Bye-bye," Fuji did not even make eye contact with Ryo, and Jigen rolled her eyes and turned back to Victor.

"Let's get going…"

"What? You're coming?" Victor blinked with surprise. Ryo nodded, and pulled Victor out of the tiny joint by his bolo tie and out to his now-familiar car. "I suppose you want to drive?"

"Damn straight. I know a shortcut," Ryo nodded and took hold of the keys as Victor tossed them to her. She hopped into the car and started it up, once again not waiting for him to buckle up as she zoomed out of the parking lot.

While they made their way to the Mexican border, the others inside continued doing just as they had done before. Yukiko was beating Ally hand over fist in the pool game, Toshiro had now entered a drinking competition, Fuji had been invited to dance with one of the men, and Odori continued to look straight ahead at all of them with great annoyance. She pulled some of her hair away from her face and wondered how Fuji had talked her into wearing it down in the first place.

"Excuse me, Ma'am, is this seat taken?"

"Yes," Odori was quick to answer. She glared as she heard the man seat himself next to her, and refused to look in his direction. She looked over to him, and her eyes widened. He was rather attractive… For an American. Blonde hair, tan… Very opposite of what she was used to.

"Sorry, it's just that you looked pretty depressed. You looked like you needed a little cheering up," he gave a shrug and ordered drinks for them.

"I don't speak English."

"That's fine, I speak Japanese," he smiled and immediately switched over to Odori's favorite language, much to her surprise.

"You aren't getting in my pants," said Odori sternly.

"You're wearing a dress."

"You know exactly what I mean," Odori narrowed her almond-shaped eyes and looked down at the drinks that were brought to their table. She looked at the beer as though it were some object from an alien spaceship.

"I'm guessing you don't drink a lot," he laughed and took his beer and took a sip of it. "You don't seem like the type."

"I drink sake," Odori responded, nudging the drink away from her like it were a bottle plague.

"Try this, you might like it!" he smiled widely, making Odori's annoyance grow to an extraordinary level. "Come on, don't look at me like that, Miss—"

"Odori…"

"Dori?"

"Only my friends may call me that, and I don't remember you as being one of them."

"You…. Don't date a lot, do you?"

"I don't see a point," Odori answered with the same look which gave the impression that she was about two seconds away from splashing her drink in his face or worse. Odori had had her nails done, a fact that would have struck fear in most men, but not this one.

"That's a shame. Maybe you should give it a shot, you just might enjoy yourself! Or does that scare you?"

"Leave," Odori repeated, this time in English.

"Here," he handed her a small card and nodded. "If you change your mind, let me know," Odori waited until he was out of sight, and slipped the card in her purse.

The Mexican Coast:

"This is really gorgeous," Ryo said as she stood out on the porch of the beach house Victor had taken her to. It had been hours since she had left, and everyone was probably still at the bar. Luckily there was a designated driver already (Yukiko) and Ally rarely drank, so he would be able to drive the Vespa home, leaving little worry in Ryo.

"I bought it last year. I haven't had a lot of time to really live here, though. Not that any house I own is really considered a home," Victor answered with a shrug. He seated himself on a patio chair and studied Ryo while she looked out at the scenery, resting his elbows on the table and his chin on his clasped hands. "I have a question… If you hate me, then why—"

"Do I always go off with you? I have no idea," Ryo shrugged and seated herself next to Victor. "I've tried to answer that one, and the best I can come up with is you, in a sick way, are really sweet to me."

"I only treat you as you deserve to be treated," Victor replied.

Ryo sighed and placed a hand over her eyes, while Victor looked onward puzzled. "This isn't… This isn't how it was supposed to be! This isn't how anything was supposed to be, damn it!"

"You still love him?"

"Of course I do!" Ryo shouted, and looked over at Victor, who wore his usual complacent expression. "I've loved him since we were kids! It… It just isn't fair!"

"Nothing really is, in life."

"Oh, don't even start on that with me! I've heard it too many times to be hearing it from you!"

"I know what it's like to love someone and not have them love you, no matter how hard you try," Victor announced in a quiet pause after a few tense moments between the two. "You do everything you can in hopes that maybe, just maybe they'll see past the reputation and give the real you a shot."

"You have no idea what it's like to have your ex run off with another person of the same friggin' gender! I… I could've competed with a woman—How in the hell am I supposed to compete with a man?"

"You aren't," Victor replied, folding his hands together and giving a heavy sigh. "Letting go is one of the hardest things you'll ever have to do in your lifetime, if not the hardest."

"I don't want to, though…."

"Then think about the children. Those two children they have adore them. You wouldn't want to split up their parents, would you? You have to take them into consideration."

"You're just making up reasons for me to run to you," said Ryo numbly. Victor, in return, said absolutely nothing.

"Everyone may think that Ari is nice, but he's the biggest sinner out of anyone to make a beautiful woman like you cry over him so much. He has no idea how good he had it."

"No, he doesn't," Ryo, for once, agreed with Victor on some subject.

"I'd like an idea of what he had," said Victor after a long pause. He then braced himself for the beating that he knew was coming from Ryo, and was stunned when she did no such thing.

"I… I don't think I could right now," Ryo admitted with a shake of the head.

"I'm not asking you to stay the night, Ryoko. I'm just asking for an opportunity to be able to have you go out with me for once and not have you judge me upon what I've done in the past. Would that be fair?"

"I… I haven't…."

"Hm?"

"I haven't really gone out with anyone except Ari."

"So you're afraid, and that's what part of this is all about," Victor leaned forward and took one of her hands. "Don't worry; I will be on my best behavior."

Ryo knew how he would act… She just wasn't sure what the real Victor would be concocting, or if this was the real Victor.

A Texas Airport:

"So, it leads to the original copies of the Apocrypha?" Heiji looked over to Max again, and Zenigata nodded from his magazine. Heiji was only playing dumb in order to make believable conversation, however. He was amazed at how slowly Interpol received their information. If he weren't a spy for the enemy, he probably would've been an excellent researcher.

"Yup, the lost books of the bible…. Includes the Gospel According to Thomas… Personally, I think we had it right at my Rabbinical School. It's like the movies—The original's a masterpiece and the sequel's all right, but it's not the same."

"How much did your parents pay for you to go to learn an analogy like that?" asked Heiji with a few stunned blinks of the eyes.

"Enough to put me in debt to them for a long time. You see, my parents did the right thing when they started to see me veer off."

"Please, they probably did it too late, as big a moron as you are. You probably have lost so many brain cells from drugs they could do a medical study on you. Plus how can you bash my parents when your sister's my mother?"

"I wasn't bashing," said Max with a shake of the head.

"You were bashing…"

"I was not! Damn it! Quit acting like a kid!" Max growled. His cell phone rang, and Max gave a sigh of annoyance and of relief, and picked it up. "Hello? Hey, Honey. How are you?"

"Oh, boy… Here we go…" Heiji removed a small case from his shirt pocket, opened it and placed in the earplugs he had purchased earlier in place. Max gave Heiji a small glare and then turned his attention back to his conversation with Leo.

"Avery and Dako are doing fine, too," said Leo through his side of the phone call. In France, it was early morning, and he was giving Avery a feeding; it was four in the morning, so naturally he was hungry. "Do you know when you're going to be home?"

"I have no idea," Max replied regretfully. "Hopefully soon… I really miss you…."

"I miss you, too. The kids do… A lot…. Max, this is going to be the last case you're doing away from home, right?"

"What else could I do? Give out parking tickets?"

"You could always ask them to put you on the French Police squad… I'm sure they'd agree to that."

"I—I can't even speak French that well, though," sputtered Max. "Listen, your sister's out there, so—"

"Hey, I've got to go, my tea's boiling," Leo said in a deadpan tone. What concerned Max is that he heard no kettle in the background. "I'll talk to you later. Bye."

"I love you," said Max quickly.

"Yeah… Love you too…" Leo muttered, and then 'click'; he was gone.

"You know who you're turning into, right?" Heiji looked over at Max and removed his earplugs.

"I'm doing what's right for my family!" snapped Max.

"And I'm sure that's exactly what your dad said when he left his family."

"I am not leaving them!"

"Yeah, but you're spending a lot of time away from home…. You never know, Leo's a nice guy, he could always meet someone else."

"He wouldn't do that," said Max quietly.

"And you know that how…? I mean, he's bi, so there's a great big world open to him there."

"Listen, I'm the creep. I'd be the one to screw up before him. He wouldn't go doing anything like that to me."

Paris:

"He's so unbelievable sometimes," Leo muttered darkly and shoved his cell phone back into his jacket.

"Having some trouble?" Leo looked over his shoulder briefly and sighed at the foreigner looking in the same section as him. He held several books in his hands, and Leo smiled with amusement as he recognized all of these selections.

"More like you are…" Leo picked up one of the textbooks and adjusted his glasses. "You're trying to learn French? This won't help you…" Leo reached about and pulled off another book from one of the numerous wooden shelves, "Now, this book… This is a perfect one!"

"You're a linguist?" he inquired as he glanced over the pages of the book and then added to his stack.

"Yeah," Leo smiled sheepishly. "I'm a translator, mainly… Hey, you're a foreigner, aren't you?"

"I'm trying to learn French because my company moved me here. I'm from Great Britain, originally," he replied. "Thank you for your help, Mister—"

"Mr. Lupin," said Leo with an uneasy smile.

"Lupin? Like—"

"The thief? The _Harry Potter_ guy?"

"No; the flower."

Leo blinked a few times in the bizarre way this had been said, "Oh…"

"Papa, Avery's starting to cry, and I don't know why," Dako sighed heavily as she walked over with her weeping brother.

"He's probably hungry, is all," Leo picked up the baby bag at his feet while the Britain watched this in silence.

"You're married?" he inquired.

"Yeah," Leo smirked as he fished out a bottle of juice and handed it to Avery, who sucked at the bottle contently.

"I've got children around her age," he said with a smile, glancing down at Dako warmly.

"Yeah? That's terrific! How do they like France so far?"

"They… Live with their mother…"

"Oh… Oh, wow, I'm sorry; I didn't mean to upset you!"

"No, it's all right," he chuckled and patted Leo's shoulder with his free hand. "They're happy in Ireland with their mother. Are you separated from your wife?"

"I… I'm gay," Leo said in a low voice. Even after getting used to everything else, this still was the most difficult thing to say to a stranger. "My husband and I look after them."

"That's wonderful," he smiled as he looked at Avery, and then at Dako. "I'm in line for a new tutor, would you be interested?"

"I don't know… My schedule's pretty packed… I just had to quit translating for a book company because of my workload."

"Well, could you fit in even one hour a week?"

"And hour? Well, I guess I could do an hour…"

"Good—Call me up, and we'll set up a date," he smiled, and pulled out a business card for Leo. Leo took the card and glanced it over before placing it in his jacket pocket.

"I don't have a good feeling about this…" Leo muttered to himself as he watched the man who was older than himself and named Thomas pay and exit the bookstore.

"Oh, come on!" Dako rolled her eyes and sighed in disgust at Leo's cautiousness over the situation. "The most you'll do is make Dad jealous, and, let's face it, he could use a little jealousy."

"Dako, you know how I feel about hurting people. It's bad enough that Ryo's still aching years after our breakup…. I can't do that to another person," Leo shook his head and frowned. He walked to the counter, sighed, and paid for the stack of books, and let Dako carry them as he placed Avery in his baby seat.

"He was like checking you out," Dako chuckled as she seated herself in the front seat and looked back at Leo. "Especially—"

"I don't want to hear," Leo held up his hand in a gesture that begged her to stop. "Didn't you listen to anything? He's got kids…"

"So do you," Dako was quick to point out. Leo gave a low moan of exhaustion, and seated himself next to his daughter. "Listen, you're right, and he's probably straight. But he's also good looking, and that would definitely get Dad's blood boiling, as jealous as he gets."

"He's just afraid of people hurting me again," Leo looked downward at the card and flipped it over. "He's offering good money…" he muttered as he read over the figure Thomas had written down hastily.

"Like you need the money… You just can't stand being bored," Dako smirked and chuckled in his direction. "Come on, it's French. It'd be a piece of cake, and you'd probably end up broadening your social circle."

"I'll try it once," Leo looked over his glasses at Dako firmly. "But if he tries anything, he's gone and we're moving."

"What are you afraid he'll do, anyway?"

"Dako, there's a lot of good things about being a Lupin, but there are some bad ones, too. One of the bad things is it's hard to trust anyone."

"You'll be fine, trust me," Dako sighed and patted him on the hand. "You're going to get over your social phobias if it kills me, Papa."

Texas:

"You got a guy's number?" Yukiko laughed and took another sip of her juice as she sat across from Odori. "Don't let Fuji know, she'll be trying to give you tips… I never even knew you dated, Odori."

"Well, I… I didn't tell him yes!" Odori snapped, looking downward at the table and narrowing her eyes and trying to keep her face from turning red.

"Oh, c'mon, it could be fun," Yukiko nudged her and chuckled.

"That's rich, coming from you," said Odori with a frown.

"This ain't about me, though. I was saying the same thing you were years ago, and now I'm carryin' the next potential Goemon."

"What in the hell are we going to call_ this_ one?"

"I dunno, Go-Go?"

"Dad hates being called that to this day," Odori smirked ever so slightly. "It didn't help when _Kill Bill _came out, either. Lupin once got him drunk, and he woke up in the…. Never mind, it's too disturbing to go into detail."

"Yeahhhh….. So, what's he look like anyway?"

"Blond, taller than me—"

"Dori, almost everyone's taller than you. You're 5'0 on a good day."

"May you suffer horrible morning sickness for that comment, Jigen. Anyway, blond, taller than me, blue eyes…"

"A white guy? Odori, I never knew!" Odori with gripped from behind around the neck and turned to Fuji, who wore her usual goofy smile across her face. "You met somebody? That's soooo sweet! I've been hoping you'd hook up with someone for a long time now, anyway!"

"I'd really like it if you stayed out of this, Fuji," Odori loosened Lupin's grip and felt her face grow an even deeper shade of crimson. If she had been wearing her red gi, she would've matched its color by this point.

"Oh, you know that I can't help playing matchmaker!"

"Girls who play with matches get burned," Odori quickly retorted.

"What, did you get that from your dad or something? Sounds like one of his crackpot fortune cookie sayings."

"It's from _Fiddler on the Roof_," Odori answered, sipping her beer and shuddering at its bitterness.

"Heh, too much time alone with Toshiro, I'm guessing," Fuji chuckled and nudged her, causing her to spill some of her drink on herself. Odori reached for her sword, and Fuji stepped back, and held up her hands in defense. "Hey, I just came to tell you that there's like this martial arts brouhaha goin' on, and there's a contact I need to hook up with there anyway, sooooo…."

"You want me to compete?"

"I figure kicking a little ass will take your mind over everything," Fuji shrugged. "And hey, maybe you'll get a little in the process!"

"Ugh," Odori placed a hand upon her forehead, and Fuji responded with her usual Lupin-like laugh. "I'll go, but only to distract myself."

"Thanks, Dori-chan!" Fuji went to embrace her, and Dori quickly drew her blade and glared at Lupin, daring her to come another inch closer to her. Fuji chuckled and complied, taking a step back away from the samurai. She blinked as she bumped into a figure behind her, who she thought to be Toshiro at first. She slowly turned about, and a wide smile came open her face, "Hey! Long time no see! You should've kept in contact with us!" she laughed as she recognized the face immediately.

"Yeah…" Odori recognized him as the man who had given him her number earlier, and from Yukiko's stunned expression, she also recognized him.

"I… Hi…" Yukiko muttered numbly.

"Hey," he met eye contact with her briefly and placed his hands in the pockets of his jeans. "Been a while, huh, Yuki?"

"You two know one another?" Odori looked to the blond man, and then to Yukiko. From both of their stunned features, it was clear that these two were quite familiar with one another.

Mexico:

"That dream again," Victor sat up in his bed and laid a hand upon his head. "Always with the damn rabbits!" He sighed in self disgust and stood up from his bed, dressed in a pair of long sleep pants. He rubbed his eyes and sipped some of the water in a half-full glass on his dresser, and walked out of his bedroom, led by the sound of a television running. He glanced in at Ryo through the cracked door of his guest room and gave a small smile. She had decided to leave in the morning, and why she left the door open was a mystery to him.

He decided against his better judgment to step into the room; he would use the excuse that he needed to turn off the light in her room, anyway. He didn't like waste, and he never had. Victor nearly tripped upon something as he entered, but quickly gripped onto the doorknob and managed to keep himself upright.

Victor cursed quietly and then lifted up the bottle, and his horror mounted as he looked over the empty aspirin bottle. He immediately tossed this aside and ran over to Ryo, taking her by the arms and shaking her.

"Ow damn it! Stop!" Ryo grumbled and pushed him away roughly. "What's your problem? Why are you even in here?"

"Huh?" Victor blinked, puzzled, and then looked at the empty aspirin bottle on the floor once again. He vaguely remembered almost being out in the first place, and gulped as he turned back to the still-angry Ryo.

"What in the hell are you up to, Victor?" Ryo asked in a growl.

"I… I thought you had…" Victor wordlessly glanced down at the bottle and cleared his throat.

"You thought I OD'd?" Ryo raised an eyebrow with disbelief. "You… You're joking, right?"

"Listen, that's what it looked like, and you're not exactly the most mentally stable person I know," replied Victor in a slightly annoyed tone. This always happened when he tried to play hero; it blew up in his face.

"So… You were worried?" Ryo continued. "Why, because of the fact that Fuji would think it was you?"

"I've killed people here before and gotten away with it, that isn't the issue," Victor responded, rising and still feeling incredibly embarrassed. "Sorry to bother you, Ryo."

Ryo paused, and sat up in bed, "Do you love me?" she inquired when he had almost made it to the door. Victor placed his hand on the doorframe and gripped it.

"That's a hard thing for me to admit, but I'm not denying your claims," Victor replied, and then turned to exit.

"Victor, damn it, wait!" Ryo snapped. "Get back in here!"

"You aren't my mother, Ryoko," said Victor, still out of sight in the hallway.

"Call me Ryo. It's what everyone else calls me," Ryo said with a sigh.

"I'm not everyone else," Victor stuck his head back in the doorway, his expression tired and his body wanting to leave the scene quickly.

"No… No you're not… You're certainly different, Victor," said Ryo with a sigh, her voice now level and calm now, "Do you think you could step back in here for a few seconds?"

Victor nodded, and stepped back into the room, bringing the door to a close behind him. He brought over a desk chair and seated himself next to Ryo, wondering what exactly she had called him back in for. She didn't have her gun in her hand, so that was already a good sign.

Ryo reached forward and placed a hand behind Victor's neck, then leaned in and kissed the stunned Lupin. Victor blinked, speechless, as Ryo parted from him, and he quickly rose and excused himself from her guest room.

Ryo rolled her eyes and placed her forehead in her hand, wondering exactly what in the hell she thought she was doing, anyway.

"Well, I might as well check in on him…" Ryo sighed and rose from her bed, then walked down the hall into his room. Victor was looking out the window at the beach seen, his arms folded over his chest. He glanced over at Ryo briefly, and then turned his attention back to the scenery.

"You sure get nervous pretty fast when things start to go your way, don't you?" Ryo smirked as she stood next to him.

"I'm not used to them going my way, is all," said Victor quietly, not bothering to turn his attention back to Ryo.

"That's got to be hell on your self esteem."

"Like you wouldn't believe," Victor muttered, and turned from her, letting his sights fall upon a bottle of tequila at his bedside he had purchased earlier in the day.

_'Maybe it's not so much what I want, but more of what I need… Besides, how could it possibly be any worse than any other relationship I've been in?'_ Ryo thought as she looked over at Victor, who was in the beginnings of drinking himself into a stupor. She slowly stepped toward him and removed the bottle from his hands, Victor looking upward puzzled at her, wondering what exactly she was thinking.

"You never answered my question yes or no," said Ryo with a chiding smile as she screwed the cap of the bottle shut and leaned down in front of Victor.

"What in the world are you up to?" Victor asked suspiciously.

"A…. I guess a change of heart…" Ryo said with a shrug. "I honestly thought it was mainly all an act to try to get Ari mad at you, until I saw that you were really worried that I'd hurt myself in there."

"Maybe you should think about this a little more," said Victor quietly. "What… What about Ari?"

"I still feel for him, I can't get rid of those feelings, but… You're right about the kids; even if things get strained with Max, he'd stay in the relationship for the sake of those kids."

"…Now what?"

"This is the part where you kiss me, moron," Ryo said with a smirk.

"Oh," Victor blinked in surprise, still growing accustomed to a woman talking to him like this, and then complied to her request.


	25. The Gambler

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Lupin, but, um, if anyone who's in charge of production is reading this, I wouldn't mind helping out … coughs

Okay, some-body doesn't like Victor…

More like a whole mess of people! Yeah, I know, he's creepy… Lovably creepy, though. Anyway, about the Jordan question… Yes, I know he hasn't been featured much, but don't worry, I haven't forgotten about him! All will be revealed in good time, I promise! (please don't hurt me for all of these cliffhangers—What fun would a story with complete resolution be, anyway!)

Fun Fact of Boredom: Leo and Max's relationship is most closely based on the relationship between the two main characters in Sanami Matoh's FAKE…. Heiji and Fuji's could be said to be based off a of a _Jerry Springer _episode (joking).

Chapter Twenty-Five: The Gambler

Paris:

"I've never met anyone else who liked Leo Ferre so much," Leo admitted as Thomas looked through his CD collection and pulled out a selected disk.

"He's my favorite nihilist," Thomas replied with a smirk. "I'm just glad that you'll be able to help me understand what he's saying…"

"Heh, yeah, well, that's what I study for!" Leo replied with a sheepish smile, "Why don't we get to work now?"

"You have Billie Holiday? You really are well versed for such a young man… That can be expected though, considering your background, I'm sure," Thomas said as he seated himself in the living room next to Leo on the couch in the center of the room. There were several books on a coffee table in front of them, and Dako looked out at the two briefly as she walked out to pick up the ringing phone.

"Hello? Hey," Dako smiled at her father and his guest. "It's for me; I'm going to take it into my room."

"Okay, sweetie," Leo nodded her off, and turned his attention back to Thomas.

"Dako, what's wrong? Is everything okay?" Max asked, puzzled. She almost always gave Leo the phone first, and then she would afterwards talk to Max.

"Hold on," Dako whispered, and waited until she was in her room with her door locked to continue speaking. "I need you to run a background check," Dako said quietly.

"Huh? Why? Do you think another one of your teachers is an ex-Soviet spy again?" Max asked suspiciously. "Because you know that that was a giant waste of time for all of us."

"It's some guy Papa's tutoring," Dako replied, seating herself on the bed.

"A guy? Is… Is he there now?"

"Yeah, they're both on the couch."

"….It… It's just tutoring, right, Dako?"

"Yeah, but still… I don't think you'll find anything, but I don't want to be wrong."

Max gave a sigh, "Dako, you'll be an excellent detective someday."

"That'd get in the way of me wanting to be a veterinarian," Dako replied jokingly. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, it's just—"

"I'll fax you the information, but I'll watch after them if you want."

"I'd really appreciate that, Dako," Dako could hear exactly how tired Max had suddenly become with this news, and wondered if she had done the right thing by telling him about Leo's company. "I've got to go, but tell Leo hello for me."

"Can do. See you later," Dako replied, and hung up on her end.

She walked out and saw Leo and Thomas seated next to one another, and she blinked as she saw Leo laugh. Thomas had actually made Leo laugh. She was definitely worried now.

Mexico:

Ryo raised her head and briefly wondered where she was exactly as she looked about the Spanish-themed room. She then remembered as she grew more and more conscious, "Oh, yeah… Mexico…" She yawned, stretched and rose, and rested her arms upon her knees. She saw a pair of black boots in the corner of the room, and smirked. So that hadn't been a dream, either…

She rose and opened Victor's closet, and found a bathrobe, and put on the thick terry material garment, and exited the room, looking for Victor. She was pleasantly surprised to find a pack of cigarettes and a lighter in the bathrobe, and removed the pack and took a single one, placing it in her mouth while she looked about for her host, "Victor?" she called after taking a drag of it.

Silence followed, and Ryo grew even more curious as to what had happened to him. She found him out of the porch on the telephone, leaned back in a lawn chair and dressed in his usual black jeans and shirt. The shirt had been unbuttoned, however, and Victor was barefoot as he smoked and spoke on his cell phone.

The door was cracked, so Ryo made sure to keep herself well hidden and narrowed her eyes, and then leaned against the door as much as possible to hear as much of Victor's talking as she could.

"Yes… She's still here… What! I… Well, yes… Heh, yeah, I guess everyone's got a breaking point…" Victor chuckled and took another drag of his cigarette, "So you'll have it over here before she leaves? I'll try to keep her here as long as I can, in that case. It's of upmost importance that it get here by this evening; my plan can't go through without it. I'll speak with you later, goodbye."

He hung up the phone, and Ryo slowly backed away from the glass doors, putting a hand upon her face. Something about the way he had said it… She hadn't liked it. He was keeping something from her, and she had only just learned to slightly trust Victor. It wasn't a time for him to be keeping secrets.

Victor rose from his chair, and Ryo managed to run over to the kitchen and quickly retrieve some pots and pans, and began to scramble to find suitable breakfast foods to cook.

"Good morning," Victor leaned against bar adjoined to the kitchen counter, and raised his eyebrow and the hamburger meat upon the table. "Isn't it… A little early for beef?"

"Heh, something my mom made!" Ryo said with a nervous smile. "Breakfast burgers."

"….Right…. I was wondering if you could stay the evening, Ryoko," Victor slowly sauntered into the kitchen and stood behind Ryo, slipping his arms about her waist while she began to cook. "I have something I want to give you," he added quietly.

"Um, I think that I… I have a doctor's appointment today," Ryo tried to keep her famous cool attitude, but felt it depleting as she continued to speak to Victor.

"In Texas?" Victor asked with a curious smile, "Somebody's lying…"

"I, Victor…"

"I have some work to do today, and I'd like to ask you to join me. I need a getaway driver," Victor explained. "It's a simple enough job… Just some small trinkets to get rid of this urge I've had to steal something."

_'Well, I'll be driving, so I'll be in control…' _Ryo was too busy on her thoughts to notice her hand coming in contact with a hot burner. She let out a gasp and placed the finger that had fallen on it and cursed to herself.

"Ouch, those hurt," Victor took her hand and sighed. "Let's get this cleaned up…"

"I'll be fine," Ryo sighed, shaking her left hand. "I use my right hand, anyway."

"That isn't how it was last night," Victor gave a smarmy smile, and quickly changed the subject as he felt Ryo's annoyance with him return. "Come on, let's get this cleaned up; aloe will help it."

Ryo gave a sigh of defeat, and allowed Victor to walk her toward the bathroom.

Texas:

"Aren't you a little worried about your sister going off with Victor?" Toshiro inquired, looking down at the couch where Yukiko lie spread out, her fedora over her eyes and her stomach beginning to show. "Are you even awake?"

"Yeah, I'm awake," Yukiko sighed and sat up on the couch, and looked upward at Toshiro. "She'll be fine! She wouldn't let Victor near her for all of the treasure in Egypt!"

"I'd doubt that," Toshiro muttered and seated himself next to Yukiko.

"Somethin' on your mind?" Yukiko asked, placing a hand upon Toshiro's shoulder and smiling in her usual relaxed way.

"Who was that man there last night? The one who came on to my sister?" asked Toshiro, glancing down at his wife and then straight ahead at the television.

Yukiko took a sigh, and leaned back on the couch, pushing her fedora upward, "I never thought I'd have to explain this to you… I was hoping I wouldn't have to… He was my partner for a while. While you were in New York playing Robin Hood and Mr. Mistofolees."

"I was Rum Tum Tugger… I was too tall for Mistofolees. Anyway, continue."

"He was also my first," she added with a blush.

"First?" Toshiro frowned, and looked over at her. "First what?"

"First… How do I put this without you wanting to friggin' kill him?" Yukiko wondered aloud with a sigh as she scratched the back of her head. "He was my first… Really serious relationship… Really, really serious."

Toshiro's eyes widened as this registered, and he began to rise to reach for his swords. Yukiko quickly pulled him down by the arm and gave him a stern and serious expression, "Don't go killing Jordan, okay?"

"Jordan, that's a nice name," Toshiro snapped.

"Almost as good as Julia," Yukiko shot back with the same iciness. Toshiro had nothing to add after she made this comment. "You shouldn't worry about him, I don't think he'll want a pregnant lady. Besides, he seems more interested in Dori, anyway."

"Yeah, but why?"

"He did the same with me. He likes a challenge, so he approaches the most pissed-off looking woman he can find. They're like friggin' magnets to him!"

"What, is he a moron, too?"

"You did the same thing with me, Pal," Yukiko said with a smirk.

"Yeah, but I already knew what I was in for," Toshiro answered. "I want a word with him, later."

"If we even see him again; that I doubt," Yukiko answered with a shrug and a sigh.

Across town:

Fuji stared through the glass at the tapestry and smiled. For being so old it was gorgeous, and not just because of the price it would go for. It was bright red with numerous Biblical figures upon it. With further inspection and a little knowledge, it was a map to something even more beautiful.

"My favorite part's the depiction of the River Jordan," Fuji smiled at the distinct American voice behind her, and turned about to come face-to-chest with the tall blond whom she had seen at the bar with Odori last night.

"Of course it would be," she chuckled. "My dad's upset that you haven't been calling him; you were one of his better students. You just didn't get along well with Ari. Yukiko-chan, though…"

"I heard Ari's off doing his own thing now," Jordan leaned against a railing in front of the glass and spoke without turning to Fuji. She leaned against the rail as well and looked over at him with a smile.

"If you mean by Zenigata, then, yeah, he is… Why do I have the sinking feeling neither of us are here for the Chinese vase display?"

"You know me too well, Fuji," Jordan smiled and placed his hands behind his head, and looked offward toward the security cameras. "I'm going to have fun with this… I only wish I could see your face when I pull the rug from underneath your pointy little heels."

"My—Ohhh… Too bad you won't have the chance, Jordan," Fuji leaned inward to him and whispered. "By the time you get here I'll already be on the first flight to Pakistan to meet my buyer."

"Pakistan?" Jordan gave a small chuckle, and then placed a hand upon Fuji's shoulder. "Would you mind getting those things away from me? This is a lit-tle uncomfortable."

"Heh, yeah, it'd be like if I was that close to Ari with these babies," said Fuji with a sigh and an amused smile before taking a step back and placing her hands upon her waist. She was near unrecognizable with a pair of wire glasses and her hair pulled tightly back. She opted for a gray pantsuit to add to her attempts to blend into the rest of the crowd. Jordan had done the same, dressing in a pair of khakis and a generic T-shirt, along with a baseball cap.

"I don't think Ari's seen those in a while," said Jordan with a chuckle and a raised eyebrow.

Fuji rolled her eyes and sighed while Jordan laughed, and then her facial features grew foxlike, and she smiled in a cunning matter, "Hm, what do you say to wager?"

"Wager? What could you offer me that I couldn't get on my own?" Jordan asked. He wanted her continue for the sake of making him laugh even more.

"I raise you one samurai warrior," Fuji smiled, and revealed from seemingly nowhere a white card with Odori's name written vertically in Japanese.

"You're kidding, right?" Jordan took the card and continued to look down at it, stunned at this bet. "Would she even agree to this?"

"Probably not, but I know you want a date with her," said Fuji with a goofy Lupin smile. "You know you want it, Jordan. Plus, if you win, you get to wipe this smug smile off of my face!"

"That seals the deal. What if I lose?"

"Well, hrm… I hadn't thought about that, actually," Fuji admitted. "I would be happy enough knowing that I kicked your ass at something."

"Well, then I—"

"But, I can always manage to come up with something. Here, lean in a little, and I'll let you know what you can do for me," Fuji beckoned for him, and Jordan bent down to her level, and jerked back as Fuji unfolded the details of her plans to him.

"Na-ah, I'm out. Bye, and good friggin' luck."

"Come on! What are you, chicken?" Fuji laughed as she watched Jordan begin to walk out of the exhibit. "Come onnnnn…. Chicken!"

"Shut up, Fuji—I'm not going to pretend to be Ari's ex just so you can piss off that cop who's following you around."

"Chi-chi-chicken!"

"Fine, damn it, fine," Jordan threw up his hands and sighed, exasperated. He gave Fuji a glare and pointed to her, "But if I lose, I swear I'll—"

"Yeah, yeah. Have fun meeting Yukiko's husband," Fuji said with flippant wave.

"Her _what_?"

"You know, the tall red head guy in the dress?"

"You mean she's married to Lurch?" Jordan gasped.

"Yup," Fuji nodded. "And that ain't the best of it…"

"Oh, God, what?"

"She's a mommy," Fuji said with a wide smile.

"I guess I shouldn't have gotten out of touch with her," Jordan muttered.

Later that evening, Texas:

"You did WHAT?" Odori shrieked. It took the combined force of Toshiro and Ally to pull the samurai woman from Fuji, and Toshiro had to hold Odori's hands behind her back while Ally went to hide Zantetsuken from sight.

"Don't worry, Dori, it's in the bag!" Fuji waved it off and smiled. "Besides, he's a nice guy. Yukiko should know."

"But that doesn't mean you have permission to whore me out! If you're so intent on betting, why don't YOU date him?" Odori demanded.

"I can't, and that's a longggg explanation, so I won't go into it," said Fuji with a sigh. "Come on, Odori. Think of this as motivation…. What do you have against this guy, anyway? Are you gay now?"

"I'm only as gay as you," Odori spat.

"Heh. Why don't you relax for three seconds, okay? Just think this over before you kill me. If I win, I'll make sure you get a larger cut than usual, promise."

"I don't care about your dirty money, Fuji. Not in this instance. This is a matter of my honor, and how you've damaged it by putting me up like some sort of prize."

"You sound scarily like your father sometimes, you know that?"

"I can cut as well as he can, too," Odori said in a tone which made Fuji give a shudder.

"O-kay… Well, I'm sorry, Dori-chan, but a deal's a deal, and as a Lupin I'm bound to it. You know, it's like with you and your family. You guys have things you need to uphold, too."

"You make sense with this statement. But be warned that if you do lose, Fuji, not only will you lose your bet, you'll lose your head."

France:

"Really, you didn't have to get me anything, I don't mind doing this!" said Leo with a shake of the head. He and Thomas sat in the living room, as usual, Avery resting upon Leo's knee. Dako was continuing her work as a spy for her other father, and watched the two quietly from the crack opening in her door.

"I insist," Thomas smiled and handed Leo the small bag. Leo opened the bag with his free hand, and pulled out a small wooden box with bronze trim about it. He opened it and listened to the small tune it played.

"It's Leo Ferre," said Thomas in a low tone, "_Avec Les Temps_… Sad song, I know, but it was the only one I could find of that artist. It was either him or François Hardy, but I wasn't sure if you were keen on her."

"This is… I don't know if I can take this," Leo sputtered. "It must have cost you a fortune!"

"Take it, please. I'd feel insulted if you didn't," Thomas said sternly. Dako tried to suppress a chuckle as she figured out who Thomas reminded her of. It had taken her all day to think of where he had seen his face before, and he looked vaguely like professor Snape from those _Harry Potter _movies Max always rented for her. So, this made Lupin and Snape. It was too funny not to find humor in, even if it was a serious situation.

"All right," Leo said quietly as he set down the box and adjusted Avery on his lap. The little boy was squirming and gurgling, and Leo chuckled and wiped his son's mouth when he began to drool on his bib. "Thanks again, Thomas."

"His other father's a fool for leaving you here alone," said Thomas quietly.

"…I'd like if you didn't talk about Max like that."

"You… You're right, I'm sorry, it was totally out of line of me," Thomas threw up his hands and sighed ashamedly. "It just seems unfair that he left you alone with two children. It must be lonely."

"Well, yeah," Leo admitted with a sigh. "I mean, less than six years ago I was running around, stealing whatever I pleased. I was the king. And now I'm—"

"The babysitter."

"Well, I… Thomas, I love my children, and I love Max. I love him faults and all. I know he's short tempered and it seems like he doesn't put forth a lot in this relationship, but he's always there for all of us when we need him, and I've never known him not to help me. He's a good man."

"Then why do you look so depressed?" asked Thomas. "I, I'm sorry, I was being out of line again."

"No, it's fine," Leo sighed and shook his head, and tossed Avery into the air, catching him moments later. The little boy loved this, and giggled wildly. "I guess I am, a little. I missed him while he was in Romania, and now I miss him going off to chase Lupin without me."

"Are you going to be all right?" asked Thomas.

"Yeah. I'll be fine," Leo sighed and sat back, and allowed Avery to remove his glasses and gnaw upon one of the arms of the wire-frames briefly before realizing exactly what his son was doing. "Ave, no. Not candy."

"You look much younger without those, I'd consider making that a permanent change," said Thomas as he glanced down at Leo's glasses.

"Eh… Thanks…" said Leo uncomfortably.

"This is bad. Real bad," Dako muttered to herself.

Mexico:

"We're a good team!" Victor shouted as Ryo made another sharp turn and they were out of sight of the police and out of trouble. In the back sat several Aztec weapons, each wrapped up carefully and now residing on the seat of the red Thunderbird. Ryo immediately slowed down to fit in with the flow of traffic, and they were on the way back to Victor's home.

"Have you ever thought about leaving Fujiko?" asked Victor, briefly looking out the rearview just to make sure no one was there.

"I couldn't do that to Fuji, not with everything we've been through," Ryo answered with a shake of the head.

"What about when you get married?"

"I don't plan on it."

"Hrm, as terrific a woman you are, someone's bound to pick you up. Don't think you can run away from love, Ryoko. It'll catch up to you eventually."

"Who said I was running from anything?" Ryo inquired, looking over at Victor and then back at the road. Victor's small smile had fallen; he had gotten all that she had implied within this statement. She gave a heavy sigh and looked about; she quickly changed the subject. "So how do you plan on getting me back through the borders?"

"Underground tunnel. Don't worry about it too much," Victor leaned in and kissed her on the cheek and then smiled. "You're too pretty to be doing something like that."

_'If only your voice wasn't so calm all the time… It'd be like him saying it to you… Damn it, Ryoko, no! He's got a family for God's sake! You're a lot of things, but you're not a home wrecker…' _Ryo kept repeating in her mind.

"I know about your deal with Fuji, but if you're still single in a few years would you consider me?" asked Victor as Ryo turned out of the city and onto a stretch of desert road.

"I… We'll see," Ryo murmured, trying her best to distance herself away from this conversation and therefore not show any great emotion.

"I'll kill him for you, if you want," said Victor after a pause.

Ryo turned to him, wide-eyed, "Kill who?"

"Zenigata," Victor said with a shrug. "But if you're too upset with Ari, I… Don't look at me like that; I won't make their children orphans. I'm just saying, if you'd be happier with Ari… I'll be happy when you are."

Ryo wasn't exactly sure how to take this. She knew this was Victor's attempt at being affectionate, but the whole concept of him killing someone for her… She was flattered and disgusted all at once.

"You don't need to off anyone, Victor," Ryo sighed and closed her eyes briefly. "I've just got to learn how to get over it. I know Ari said we were finished, but I still feel like there's so much that we haven't finished…" She slowly pulled over the car onto a shoulder of the road and bowed her head. "I just expect him to come through the doors with a plan for a new heist… You know, Fuji and he would be partners again, and he'd feel the same way about me again… About the only way I can cope is by telling myself that he's dead."

Victor sighed and placed an arm over her shoulders, "And you have to run to the enemy for comfort… Poor girl… I'm sorry I can't be him, Ryoko."

Fuji's hotel hideout:

"So you're at the airport?" Fuji laid on her bed, a newspaper spread out in front of her and a chocolate bar in her free hand. She took another bite of it, and pushed up her new reading glasses, which she only recently found out she needed. They were a bright red plastic, with oval frames. Fuji set down the candy bar onto the newspaper and rolled over onto her back. "Heiji-chan, you're a genius…"

"I know," Heiji replied on the other end of the phone. "You better quit talking like that; you're making me blush. Max'll think something's up for sure."

"Heh, I could say things that would leave you bright red, Heiji."

"This I know to be true, Fuji… Hey, got to go, he's out of luggage checkout and he's walking this way. Bye, Fuji, I love you."

"Mm-hm. Bye, Heiji," Fuji replied, and hung up the phone. She sat up and stretched, adjusted her bathrobe and then looked over her plans once again. "Ryo-san better get her bracelet-loving ass back soon if this is going to work…" she muttered as she seated herself at her desk and made a change in the plan with a pencil. The phone rang once again, and she sighed, picking it up quickly, "What'd you forget this time, Sweetie?"

"Sweetie?" a confused Max repeated.

"Zenigata? How'd you get this number!" Fuji choked, "Besides, I thought you were in baggage!"

"How'd you know where I—Nevermind," Max breathed in a heavy sigh; this wouldn't be easy for him. "How I got your number is confidential. I left your boyfriend to pick up his own bags, by the way. He's mistaken if he thinks I'm a damn maid."

"He's not my boyfriend, Zenigata. Now I know you're not calling me for my world-famous casserole recipe, so spill the beans."

"I… Need your help," Max had to practically bite down on his tongue to say this, and Fuji said nothing. She was much too shocked.

"With… What?" she ventured to ask.

"I need a good excuse to get back to France," Max explained uneasily.

"Uh-huhhhh…."

"And, apparently any excuse I can come up with isn't good enough for my superiors. I can't exactly give them the real reason."

"How do I fit in here?"

"If I have you in custody, they'll let me go back to France," said Max, gulping. It was no surprise to him when Fuji, in turn, laughed wildly, and he gave a heavy sigh. "Lupin, please—You know how proud I am, and I'm begging you here."

"Why in the world do you need to go back there so bad, anyway?" asked Fuji, leaning back in her chair and still smirking.

"I think I'm going to get left if I don't go," Max answered with a sigh. Fuji's smile disappeared, and she leaned against her desk and suddenly went into her other, more serious personality.

"Things going that bad?" Fuji asked with true concern.

"That's none of your business!" Max growled.

"Quit with the strong front, Zenigata… If there's one person who can see past you, other than my brother, it's me. Now, how bad are things between you two, exactly?"

"Very," Max admitted. "I feel like this relationship's going down faster than the friggin' Titanic."

"Woah, twenty-three minutes… Now I'll definitely have to do something," Fuji muttered. "Understand that if this is a lie and you're tricking me, I will reign down upon you with the wrath of a thousand ever-burning fires…"

"Where in the hell did you pick up a line like _that_?"

"Eh, I'm trying my hand at poetry," Fuji replied, looking over the translation in the tapestry where she had pulled out this line. "I'll see you tonight, Max."

"So you'll help me?"

"Hey, what are enemies for? It's a date, Zenigata. Now remember to wear something pretty!" Fuji chirped, and hung up the phone.

Later that night:

Yukiko was in the bathroom when there was a knock upon her hotel room door. There was a wire hung up in the shower, and on the wire several of her fedoras drying out. She sighed heavily and dried her hands, thinking that Toshiro had once again locked himself out as she unlocked it. She blinked with obvious surprise as Jordan stood in the doorway with a bouquet of white lilies in his hand.

"Hey, preggers," said Jordan with a small laugh. "It okay if I come in? I don't want Fuji to see me—We've got this to-the-death bet running right now."

"Sure, I—" Yukiko narrowed her eyes as she let all of this statement sink in. "Who told you?"

"The same person who told me you were married to the Jolly Red Giant…. Where is Rudolph, anyway?"

"He's getting his bike repaired," replied Yukiko as she took the flowers and stepped out of the way for Jordan to enter. She was oblivious to the fact that across the hall Ally had been watching all of these events unfold through the peephole in his hotel door.

"What kind of bike does he drive? Harley, Honda, Cu—"

"Vespa," replied Yukiko with a sigh, setting down the lilies and seating herself in a cushy chair in the living area.

Jordan whistled and shook his head a little, laughing, "Woah, real macho guy, eh?"

"It's his dead girlfriend's."

"And now that makes it all okay."

"Jordan…"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Jordan held his hands up in the air and gave a sigh. "I'd like to get to meet this guy sometime… So you know if you're having a boy or a girl yet?"

"Nah, not for another month or two," Yukiko replied with a shrug.

"I hope it's a boy, for your sake. A girl would kill you," said Jordan with a laugh.

"I'd bite your head off for that one if I didn't know that you were right."

While the two continued talking, Toshiro returned, still aching from how much it had cost to repair his bike. He knew he would have to get rid of it in a few months as Yukiko grew larger from the baby, but he wanted to stay with it as long as he could. It was the only thing he had left from his previous life, and the only thing he had to remind him of Julia and the family he had nearly started. He loved Yukiko, but Julia always held a special spot for him. He was broken out of this musing as Ally pulled him into his hotel room, slamming the door behind him.

"What the hell? Ally, I—"

"Shhhh…." Ally placed a hand over Toshiro's mouth and held him in a headlock, the arm holding Toshiro also carrying a high-caliber rifle. Toshiro's eyes went wide, and Ally had his full, undivided attention. "That blond creep went into Yukiko's room."

"What!" Toshiro yelped as Ally removed his hand. "Let in there, then. Let me go, Ally!"

"Not so fast… Any good military tactician knows to first stake out the battlefield," Ally smirked. Yes, ever since rough waters with Carmen, Ally's near psychotic streak was slowly returning. Toshiro would have to figure out some way to get them back together, for his own health's sake.

"Umm…. Okay," Toshiro said with a few blinks, still staring at the gun. "You, you know, Buddy, you should really go visit Carmen in person… I mean, the phone's nice, but it really doesn't give the full effect…"

"Would you be quiet? You talk a lot, you know that?" Ally snapped, "Anyway, Miss Saigon, we've got a lot of work to do."

"What kind of work?" Toshiro ventured to ask, although he was frightened to do so.

"Well, my gut tells me to go in, shoot and then ask questions, but the hotel would probably get curious," Ally answered. "So I figure one of us spies as room service."

"Or I go in there and ask…." Toshiro replied quickly, "Thanks for the offer, Ally, but I'm in the doghouse with my wife enough! I don't need to be spying around on her. I tried that and I got K.O.'d with a trash can lid."

"Fine, your funeral. I tried," Ally threw up his hands in the air and sighed. "Now get out of my room if our business is done, I've got a phone call to make."

"She still isn't picking up?" Toshiro asked worriedly.

"I can't blame her," Ally said with a frown. "I deserve everything she's putting me through. But that doesn't mean I can't try to patch things up."

"If you need anything, let me know, Ally."

"I'd rather file my teeth with a rusty piece of tin than ask you for help, Toshiro."

Toshiro gave a small smirk and exited the room. He opened the hotel room just in time to see Jordan bail out of the back window. Toshiro looked over at an obviously nervous Yukiko and smiled good-humoredly, "I take that was the service elevator."

"Ha ha… Nothing happened," said Yukiko with a worried glance to Toshiro. Toshiro smiled leaned down and kissed her atop the forehead.

"I know," Toshiro answered. "I'm friends with some of my exes, too. Sure I was jealous for a little while, but while you were dating him I was probably off with Julia."

"You would've only had been like eighteen. She would've been twenty-five."

"It was New York, the sky's the limit on possibilities there," answered Toshiro with a shrug and a sigh. "We were dating by that time."

"Hey, I hope you two aren't in the middle of… Well, anyone," said Fuji with a perverse chuckle as she knocked upon the door.

Yukiko gave a groan and rolled her eyes, "What's up, Fuji?"

"We leave in five!" Fuji chirped happily. "See you two then! Love ya!"

"You know, if I read everything she said on paper, not knowing she was twenty-six, I'd swear she was ten," said Toshiro as he rose from Yukiko and walked over to where his swords sat against the wall of the room.

Yukiko retrieved a dry fedora from her bedroom and placed it upon her head, and frowned and stopped halfway, laying a hand upon her stomach.

"What's wrong?" Toshiro asked immediately.

"I just thought I felt it is all," Yukiko muttered. She shrugged and placed her gun in its holster, and they made their way out of the hotel and then onto his bike. Ally was driving the Romeo; Ryo still hadn't shown at this point, and Fuji would no longer wait for her. Fuji sat in the front seat, tapping her fingers and trying to hide the fact that she was annoyed at how empty the car was becoming.

"Toshiro, you all set back there?" Ally asked as he adjusted his headset, the one Ryo usually wore to communicate with Ishikawa.

"You bet," Toshiro replied.

"You got your helmet, Toshi-chan!" Fuji laughed in the background.

"Could we please go? My integrity as we speak is on the line!" snapped Odori, who then looked at Fuji. "It's on the same thin line as your life."

"Eh hee hee," Fuji gave a nervous smile, and Ally started up the car for their destination.

The vehicles were parked a few blocks away, and the gang took off in their separate directions. Ally remained in the Romeo awaiting pickup while Toshiro went to the front entrance and quietly laid down several smoke bombs out of the sight of the guards. As they went off, the guards ran about blindly in a panic while Odori bounded forward, cutting the front doors into several pieces. Fuji and Yukiko followed behind, Yukiko disappearing into a store room while Toshiro disabled the cameras.

Fuji looked at the piece and smiled, "My buyer'll love you, baby… Well, he'll love the fake I give him…. You'll just have to settle for me," Fuji gave a chuckle and leaned inward to work the lock upon the glass. She gave a small sigh of relief as it opened, but this didn't last long.

Just as Yukiko emerged with a forklift to carry out the tapestry, several windows above them busted out, sending glass crashing to the floor. A strong wind then followed, and the tiny Odori had to take hold of a stationary display case in order to keep from flying back.

Fuji watched as several cables swung down, and didn't see a cable with a large hook behind her; she was too busy wondering what in the hell was going on. The blunt side of iron hook made contact with her head, and she moaned as she found herself on the ground.

Yukiko shook her head and sighed, leaning upon the wheel of the forklift. She recognized this style from long ago, and sure enough, Jordan scaled down one of the ropes.

"You bastard!" Fuji shrieked, shaking her fist.

"I guess this means I kinda win, eh?" said Jordan with a smile.

"Not so fast! Interpol! Freeze!" Max shouted.

"Zenigata, I could kiss you," Fuji muttered as she rose and blinked several time to try to rid herself of her double-vision.

"Lupin the Fourth, you're under… Who in the hell is he?" Max muttered and fell out of his tense firing position as he laid eyes upon Jordan.

"No way am I going to let this wager go, not when I'm a prize," Odori muttered, and slowly crept forward and then was able to get decent footing. She ran forward and gripped onto the ropes of one of the hooks which was meant to carry up the tapestry, securing her foot in one while she swung her weight over to Jordan's rope, and cut.

The apposing thief fell to the ground, and fortunately for him his fall was broken by Max. Max looked upward at the young man atop him and Fuji gave a laugh.

"That's not new for you, is it, Zenigata?" said Fuji with a smug smile.

Zenigata growled, knowing that if he made her angry enough their deal would be off. He couldn't help think, though, that there was something indeed familiar about Jordan. He didn't have time to place it though. The tall blond was soon off of him, and now Odori was after Jordan's blood.

"Lupin, you're—"

"Yeah, yeah, I know, Blondie," Fuji sighed, holding out her wrists to Max. "Just hurry it up, okay?"

"Fuji, what in the hell are you doing?" Yukiko shrieked.

"Don't worry, guys," said Fuji with a wink. She looked at Jordan and smiled. He had barely dodged Odori's last swipe of the blade, and instead an African tribal mask had paid the price, and was now in several pieces on the ground.

"Come on," Zenigata handcuffed her and led her out, Yukiko still stunned and Toshiro attempting to break up the fight between Odori and Jordan.

"Now just wait a second," Jordan managed to grab hold of Odori, and both flushed as they realized exactly when he had placed his hands on his chest. Odori hit Jordan with the back of her elbow, and Jordan rubbed the sore area and laughed a little as she hopped back. With the high winds, though, Odori was off balance, and instead slid back and then crashed into a case of priceless jewelry.

"This is turning into a _Three Stooges_ short," Yukiko muttered tiredly. "Okay, enough 'a this crap." Yukiko stood up on the forklift, one foot just above the control panel and one hand keeping her head in place, and she shot a warning shot at the helicopter, knocking out one of its lights. The copter complied and soon was gone.

"Are you okay?" Jordan asked, bending down in front of Odori, who was working on getting herself off of the ground.

"There was minimal glass," Odori muttered, rising and dusting off her red gi. She shook one of her hands and noticed the blood coming from it, and cursed underneath her breath.

"Eh, here…" Jordan took the ribbon that tied Odori's hair back and gave it a tug, allowing her hair to fall down to its natural length below her waist.

Toshiro stood aside the forklift, and took a step forward to help them, but Yukiko reached out with one of her legs and then looked at him with a smile, and shook her head 'no', "This is kinda cute."

"Yeah, its cute, but we've still got the cops here," snapped Toshiro.

Jordan looked upward at Toshiro and thought a moment, and then smiled. "Do you guys have a getaway vehicle parked anywhere?"

"Yeah, on Twelfth Street North," Yukiko answered. "…Why?"

Jordan looked upward at the broken glass ceiling and then back at the group of three. "I can call that chopper back."

"What, and they won't shoot it?" Yukiko asked. "I say we take plan B."

"That wouldn't be busting out of here with that forklift by any chance, now would it?" Toshiro asked with a smile.

"I love it when people figure out things without me having to explain," said Yukiko with a laugh. "Hop on, everyone. You too, Jordan."

Jordan nodded and climbed onto the forklift, Toshiro grasping onto one of the sides and a pained Odori sitting closely next to him. Yukiko smiled and pulled down her fedora, and the unsuspecting police force watched as a forklift crashed through the museum after a few moments silence. Toshiro tossed out several smoke bombs he still had in his gi, and the police were baffled when, after the smoke cleared, only the forklift remained.

Heiji, meanwhile, sat in the passenger seat of the car sipping his coffee and looking down at his laptop with pure boredom. He spat out the coffee onto his laptop as he watched Fuji in the distance, next to Max… Handcuffed.

"Hiiii, Heiji-chan!" Fuji said with a smile, bending down to Heiji's window.

"What in the world are you doing?" Heiji muttered numbly.

"Helping Zenigata Keibu," Fuji answered, nodding over her shoulder in Max's direction. Max rolled his eyes and opened the back seat for Fuji, and then seated himself in the driver's seat.

"We don't tell anyone about this, agreed, Lupin?" Max adjusted his rearview mirror to get a better look at Fuji, who had already by this time worked her way out of her handcuffs.

"Agreed. Now could we stop at a Dairy Queen or something? I'm starved!" Fuji said, leaning on Max's car seat with her chin.

"Fine," Max said tiredly.

"Are you paying? I left my purse in my car."

Max gave a shudder and grit his teeth, "….Fine…"

"What kind of a deal is this, anyway? And why didn't I know about it?" asked Heiji, looking to Fuji and then to Max.

"Because no one asked you, Ishikawa!" Max growled. "Now get back to work…"

"Ow!" Fuji smacked her neck and rubbed it.

"You okay?" asked Heiji, looking over his shoulder at his and Zenigata's captive.

"Yeah, just a mosquito," replied Fuji with a shrug. "Oh, Max, tell them it's my birthday! They give you free stuff for that!"

"You are so close to sending me over the edge it isn't even funny!" Max shouted.

"Okay, okay… Yeesh, I'll bet you don't talk to my brother like that," Fuji mumbled, sitting back in her seat and pouting. She looked down at the ground for anything interesting and pulled up a book, and then her glasses.

She sat back across the seat of the police vehicle and flipped to a random page, and began to read aloud, "And then John took… Hold on a sec, Pat as in a guy, or a girl?... Zenigata, is this yours?"

"That's none of your business," Max snapped.

"I'm just saying, I didn't know they made gay smut novels is all," Fuji said with a shrug.

"It's not smut!" Max replied quickly. "It's a very deep and powerful novel!"

"Heh, are you kidding, this is more of a 'graphic novel' than all of those _Azumanga__ Daioh _manga books I read… Oh, that Chiyo-chan… And poor Miss Sakaki!"

"Hey, read more of it out loud, Fuji," said Heiji with a chuckle.

"Don't…" Max said in a firm warning tone.

"Let's see… Page 69… Kee hee hee…." Fuji began scan through it, and gave a laugh. "Ohhh, woah! Okay, Heiji-chan, listen to this! It was a steamy night not only in the city, but in the apartment of…"

Max drowned Fuji out at this point; although at any other time he would've been mortified on any other occasion, but he only concentrating on returning home at this point and hopefully finding Leo there, and everything as it was.


	26. Maxwell's Silver Hammer

DISCLAIMER: Don't own it…. Never have, and, well, unless the luck of the Irish is REALLY with me, I probably never will.

Hello, this thing on?

Wow, I actually make an update on time, this is something that's now become foreign to me. And, yes, as a reply to the question posed to me by DJ Clawson, I am still taking _Scrapbook Memories_ requests, and I'm in the process of writing a Max-centric story as we speak. In case anyone hasn't caught on, each story takes place around one character in general. First Ari, then Fuji, and then Yukiko. Max will be the next one, and hopefully, after that (if I ever find the time) Toshiro's story will come afterward. Please enjoy and review, I always love questions and comments!

Fun Fact of Boredom: Avery's name comes from one of my favorite cartoonists, Tex Avery. There's a line that mentions that when they first get the baby, about whether or not Cecilia named Avery what she did because she liked cartoons. Nope, it's simply because_ I_ like cartoons, heh.

Chapter Twenty-six: Maxwell's Silver Hammer

France:

"Here're your glasses; you left them in the kitchen," Dako found Leo in the laundry room late at night, hunched over his desk and studying as usual.

"Oh, I must've forgotten them," Leo said with a smile as he reached over and took them from Dako. In a crib at his side laid a sleeping Avery, whom he had rocked to sleep only a few moments ago. "Thanks, Dako. Are you getting ready to go to bed?"

Dako rolled her eyes and nodded, "Yes…. I don't need a bedtime, you know. I'm a big girl."

"Not big enough," Leo replied, gently picking up Avery and walking out of the laundry room and into the hallway where his and Dako's rooms were. He laid Avery to sleep in his crib in his small room, and then followed Dako to her room.

"Heh, what's this?" Leo asked as his stepped on a piece of paper and picked it up off of the floor.

"Don't read that!" Dako quickly snatched it out of his hands and threw it into a drawer. Leo smiled and seated himself on her desk chair, which was too small for him and in turn made him appear even taller.

"Is it from a boy?" he inquired.

"That doesn't matter…"

"It's okay, Dako; I got those from girls all of the time when I was your age! I even wrote a few, myself…. So what's he like? French, American… What?"

"French," Dako replied as she pulled back the covers of her bed and slid in. She switched off the lamp by her bed, leaving on only the small lamp on her desk.

"What's he look like?" Leo continued. "Blond?"

"Yeah… Have you been looking through my things!"

"No, I just guessed," Leo answered with a shrug, leaning back and resting his elbows upon the desk behind him. "You always did have a thing for blonds…"

"…..What's that supposed to mean?"

"You were only mean to Max because you had a crush on him, admit it already!"

"You're worse than a little brother sometimes!" Dako sighed, laying back in her bed and placing her hands over her face in embarrassment.

Leo chuckled and rose awkwardly from the chair and kneeled down in front of her, "It's okay, I'll let you in on a secret…. I thought he was kinda cute, too."

"Shut up," said Dako with a laugh. "I'm way past that…. When did you start liking him, anyway?"

"If it has to be an exact moment I think it'd have to be this one time we were just sitting in the police cruiser together… I don't know, but a lot of things had been happening and everything just seemed to click."

"How'd you know, anyway?"

"You must really like this guy if you're asking me questions like this," Leo kissed her on the forehead and smiled. "Trust me, you'll know. I can't really explain it; it'll just click."

"Thanks, Papa," Dako reached forward and embraced Leo briefly and then turned over. Leo rose, switched off her light, and looked back at her once more before shutting her door and walking over to his own room and changing into a lightweight purple and gold kimono.

Leo frowned as he heard the phone ring, and walked over to the kitchen where it was located and found it to be a blocked number, "Allo?"

"Would it be all right if I came over?" Leo heard Thomas's unmistakable voice on the other end, although it had certain levels of desperation which Leo was unfamiliar with hearing.

"Are you all right?" Leo asked worriedly.

"I've had better nights," Thomas admitted. "Would it be all right if I came over to talk with you? I'm in the neighborhood, and you're the only one I have who I can confide in, Leo."

"Yeah, sure…" Leo muttered, "I'll be waiting for you…" He hung up the phone and stared at it a few moments, still puzzled. He then turned and went to putting on a kettle of tea.

Outside, a little while later:

"How in the hell did I even get in the middle of a domestic dispute?" Heiji muttered with a scowl upon his face as Max pulled up to his apartment complex.

Fuji, in the back seat, looked up at the apartment with the usual disdain she felt whenever she saw the run-down building. "It's probably nothing, Blondie…"

"There's a car in my parking space," Max said distantly.

"Well, someone's probably got a visitor over, big deal. Can we go now?" Heiji inquired with a yawn.

"No, I've got to make sure…" Max responded with a shake of the head. "I just have to check…"

Inside his apartment, meanwhile, Thomas was seated next to Leo on the couch, and took another sip of his tea.

"I can't believe it… Well, I hope your son gets better," said Leo quietly as he set down his tea cup and sat back on the couch. "I mean, a car wreck…Damn…"

"I'm most upset with the fact that that bitch of a woman won't let me see him," said Thomas angrily.

"It's okay, maybe I…. I'm pretty good at getting around security, maybe I'll figure out how you can see him…"

"You'd do that for me?" Thomas asked, looking over at Leo with a stunned expression.

"Of course!" Leo responded with a ne'er-do-well smile, "What are friends for? It'll be a piece of cake!"

"I wish there was some way I could repay you," said Thomas, clasping his hands together and sighing.

"That's all right, just giving me someone to talk to is enough," Leo replied.

Thomas looked back at Leo and placed a hand upon Lupin's leg, and then said to him quietly, "I think I can figure out a way…" he leaned in and brought his face to Leo's, and Lupin in turn placed a hand on the back of Thomas's neck and only pushed away as he realized what he was doing.

"I'm… I'm so sorry… I-I can't," Leo sputtered and placed a hand over his mouth, not believing that he actually hadn't done anything to fight back.

"And once again, I was out of line… I can't help it though… You're a brilliant young man who unfortunately lets himself be beaten up by anyone who knows that they can take advantage of him! It's sad to see how unhappy you are…"

"I'm not unhappy," said Leo with a clenched jaw.

"If you weren't you would've fought back sooner," said Thomas sternly. He rose and walked into the hall. "I'll be right back. I need to make use of your facilities, but I'll be out of here afterwards… Unless you change your mind… I'll let you think it over."

Thomas disappeared and Leo leaned forward and placed a hand over his eyes, and rubbed them tiredly. He then caught a glimpse in the mirror and frowned as he noted the bathroom door still open. He quietly rose and walked into the hall, and found Dako's door also open.

Thomas was standing over the young girl's bed, something indistinguishable to Leo until he came closer and then realized from its glint that it was a knife.

Thomas turned to Leo and smiled, "You know, I do enjoy men, but they aren't my favorite."

"What in the hell are you doing?" Leo asked, horrified. "Thomas, put down the knife and I'll give you whatever you want… Anything, I swear."

"Arsène Lupin, always the first to play bloody martyr any chance he gets," Thomas said with a smirk. "Don't get me wrong, I've heard stories about you, and would have loved nothing more than to give you a test run…"

"…This is why your wife divorced you, isn't it?"

"Well, I can see now why they keep you on payroll at Interpol."

"God damn you, you sick son of a bitch," Leo growled.

"You're so cute when you're angry… Perhaps I'll take you up on that offer…"

Leo nodded and smiled, and watched as Dako stirred in her sleep and then opened her eyes. "Papa? What's going on?" she asked tiredly.

"Nothing, Dako… I just left my glasses in here," Leo muttered.

"But you're wearing them," Dako yawned.

"Listen to your father, you sassy-mouthed little bitch," Thomas snapped, and briefly looked away at Leo to berate a stunned Dako. Leo took this time to do the only thing he could think to do, and he ran forward toward Thomas and grabbed him by the waist in an attempt to knock him down. Thomas, however, was much heavier than Leo, and Lupin fell back in stunned shock as he felt a burning pain suddenly burst into his side.

Leo fell onto Dako's bed and clutched his side and gritted his teeth while the little girl screamed, and he tried to get back up onto his feet as Thomas approached them, but found this in vain. He had no idea what Thomas had hit, but caused such pain he was capable of very little movement.

It was then Leo saw a streak appear in front of him and Thomas went crashing to the ground. Dako continued to scream while Max continued to strike Thomas with the chair leg he had broken off of one of the sturdy oak chairs in the dining room.

Thomas went to stab Max in the foot, but Zenigata got a blow in, right in the back of Thomas's head.

"You get the hell out of my apartment, and stay away from my family!" Max swung down once again with a force that even surprised Leo, and there was the sound of a loud snap. He had managed to split the oak in half with his batting.

Thomas quickly rose to the floor and wiped the blood away from his face and smiled at Max, "You're very lucky… He's a great kisser."

"Zenigata…" Leo muttered almost beneath his breath.

Max growled and dodged Thomas as the Brit went to strike Zenigata with his knife and Max flew back against Dako's dresser while Thomas fell into a stack of shelving. Max grabbed Thomas by the back of the shirt collar and he went flying out into the hall, slamming against the other wall.

"Dako, I want you to close your eyes and ears," Leo said quietly to the little girl.

"Why?" asked Dako, who was quaking in fear at this point.

"Just do it, sweetheart… Ugh…." Leo clutched onto his side and gulped hard. "I don't want you to have to see this…"

Dako nodded and closed her eyes shut and placed her hands over her ears, and Leo managed to stumble over to a floorboard in her room and opened it, and pulled out the Walther he kept stored in there.

Leo leaned against Dako's doorway after managing to limp to this position, and waited until he was sure he wouldn't hit Max to fire. Leo then slumped down onto the ground, and Max set aside the wooden chair leg and kneeled down beside Leo.

"Go check on Avery," Leo said in a cough.

Max nodded and ran to Avery's room, and brought out the baby, who had only woken up at the presence of light in the hallway, and handed him off to Dako.

Fuji and Heiji had run in at the sound of the gunshots and the two quickly pulled the two children out of the gory scene.

"I'll take them to Dad's for the night," Fuji held onto Avery tightly while she spoke to Max. Heiji was helping Dako pack an overnight bag, and lifted the little girl out of the room, making sure to keep her from seeing the blood-soaked Max, the dead Thomas or the injured Leo.

"Yeah, the cops'll be here soon," Max replied as he placed a hand on the back of Avery's head and brushed his hair with his fingers. "Thanks again, Lupin…"

"It's never a problem, Zenigata," Fuji kissed Max on the cheek and then exited the apartment.

Max then turned his attention to Leo, and the two briefly made eye contact before Leo looked down at the ground, lacking the exact words to say to Zenigata.

"I shouldn't have gone," Max said quietly.

"I never knew you were that strong," Leo admitted as Max helped to lift him up and lead him into the bathroom.

"Well, being in a streetgang'll teach you how to turn most things into weapons. You should see me with a toothbrush," replied Max with a shrug. "I totally busted one of our chairs, though; sorry."

"It's okay, we only use three of them, anyway," Leo answered as Max slowly helped him peel off the kimono. "By the time Avery's old enough to use one I'll have bought a new set by then."

"Leo, this is deep!" Max placed his hand on Leo's side, a few inches above the wound. He then ran into the linen closet and then remerged with a bed sheet, and began to tear strips to wrap around Leo tightly.

"Heh… I bought those in Egypt… They're authentic Egyptian cotton," Leo said in a groggy voice.

Max stopped briefly and shuddered, "Yikes, um… Sorry… I really haven't been scoring points with you lately, have I?"

"Well, I think I've been doing the same… I shouldn't have let him in here," said Leo.

"I… I can't believe you killed him… I hope your nightmares don't start again…"

"I only had them last time because I felt guilty over it. I have no remorse for shooting him… I'm against killing, but you screw with my kids and you'll pay in blood. I only feel guilt for trusting someone like that so easily."

"I can't blame you, you were lonely," Max reached up as kissed his partner briefly and then stepped out as the tea kettle and the doorbell went off simultaneously.

The coroners took Thomas, and the ambulance transported Max and Leo to the local hospital. Thomas had missed puncturing one of Leo's lungs by inches (the knife had become lodged in Leo's ribcage, preventing any further deepening of the wound) and Max had sustained a broken wrist and a cracked rib.

Leo was watching cartoons when Max entered, looking at the television screen placidly. Max was dressed in a hospital gown as well as a bathrobe and was only getting over the large dose of drugs he had been placed on. Leo was hooked up to an IV and also had been hooked up to oxygen.

"Hey, you're tiny, you'll fit on here," Leo patted the bed and moved over as he watched Max go to sit next to him on one of the hospital recliners.

Max nodded and lifted down the bar and climbed in next to Leo, being careful not to rest on the side of his fractured rib or lean against Leo's wound. Leo placed an arm over Zenigata's shoulders, and neither said anything for a while.

"I don't get why this isn't working for us," Leo said quietly.

"I do; it's me," Max sighed.

"Max, no, it's both of us… I acted like a moron, and you did, too, let's be realistic. I was lonely and mad at you for running off, and I didn't let you know that I was kind of, well, hurt by it. But you were just trying to play the provider part, is all."

"Please don't tell me you want to split up…." Max said, looking upward at Leo worriedly, "And I don't want to be 'just friends' with you again… I couldn't look at you and not love you by this point."

Leo gulped dryly and nodded, "We'll have to figure out something, then, because this was a disaster. And I don't want to leave you either, Max. But we won't get divorced, I promise you that much. I'm not leaving you."

"Heya there!" Fuji squealed, and both let out a collective groan, "Oh, wow, now this precious! And me without my camera!"

"What is it, Lupin?" Max asked through gritted teeth.

"I brought a pre-sent!" Fuji leaned on the railing of the bed and flashed a key in front of them.

"What's this?" Leo asked, taking hold of the key and studying it.

"I'm staying in a resort town," Fuji shrugged and smiled. "I figured you two needed some R & R, so I'm going to find something worth my time there while you two strike up some flames."

"Why do you do this for us, Fuji?" asked Max.

"Because I love both of you, even if I don't act like it," Fuji leaned in and kissed Leo upon the forehead and then Max. "Dako and Ave are staying with Grandma and Grandpa for a while—And before you say anything, they don't mind, Leo, and they love having their grandkids over, so don't you two go worrying about anything! I even got you the honeymoon suite!"

"You ever think she does this to make us not want to chase her as bad?" Max asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Every once in a while I question her motives," Leo admitted. He smacked down on his neck and muttered, "Fuji, could you close the window? Something just bit me."

"It is closed," Fuji answered, turning back to the locked window.

"Damn European hospitals…. This is why I like Indian hospitals, they're cleaner," Leo grumbled.

"Hey, Lupin, could you do us a favor?" asked Max as he glanced down at the tickets.

"Eh… Depends…"

"Could you maybe switch these to four tickets? I want a family trip."

"Do I look like your travel agent?" an annoyed Fuji asked. She sighed and threw her hands up in the air, "Fine, fine. I don't see why not…. You two are lucky I'm so nice you, you really are!"

A Texas restaurant, the following night:

"And they I chopped his head off," Odori took a sip of her sake and smiled at Jordan, hoping this tale had scared him away. Much to her annoyance, it hadn't. He only exchanged this with some equally gory story.

"How's your hand?" Jordan asked, resting his beer on the table and glancing at Odori's still bandaged hand.

"Oh," she blinked as she looked down at the bloodied wound and then looked back up at Jordan across the table of the small restaurant. "It's…. Better."

"Good, I was hoping you didn't cut anything vital," said Jordan with a distant nod.

"You're wishing I was someone else, aren't you?" Odori asked after a pause in between the two.

"What! No, I—"

"I'm used to it," Odori gave a shrug and sighed. "My daughter's father…. The situation was similar…"

"You've got a daughter?"

Odori nodded, "Yes, but she lives with her father and stepmother now. It's basically either let her live with them or have an entire clan on my tail."

"I would've taken the clan."

"You aren't a parent, you wouldn't understand," Odori muttered. "His wife trusted me, and I broke that trust. The least I could do was that… She was happy I was carrying; she can't have any of her own."

"I guess that's nice of you," said Jordan with a shrug; he was not exactly what sort of a stance to take on this. It seemed like anything he told her would upset her. Personally he would've kept the child come hell or high water, but this was just him. He felt a bite upon his arm, and immediately slapped down thinking it was a bug. He looked at the mark and frowned.

"Excuse me, I'll be right back," Jordan smiled politely and rose, pushing his seat in, and then made his way into the bathroom.

He then felt dizzy, and leaned against the wall of the bathroom to keep it from spinning. He slowly slunk down and soon found himself on the floor, and then it went black.

Mexico:

"Victor, I'm sure it was nothing!" Ryo sighed as she rummaged through the bathroom medicine cabinet and looked for a spray Victor swore he kept just for bites like the one he had just suffered from. Ryo had learned many things about Victor over the past few days, and among these was the fact that he was a hypochondriac. She was more amused by this than annoyed, and found it adorable, in an odd sense, that someone as tough as him would make a big deal out of the smallest things.

"There's a million things here to kill anyone; you don't know that," Victor replied as he glanced in the mirror at his neck and then glanced down at the black box on his dresser. It was bad enough that it had arrived late, and Victor had had to threaten the jeweler like he had, now he was convinced he was going to drop dead from his 'mortal' wound. He placed it in his pocket as Ryo entered and turned around and smiled at her.

"I couldn't find anything," Ryo said with a sigh as she placed her thumb behind his chin and then tilted his head to get a better look at the injury. "It's okay, it's just a small bite… You'll be fine, I promise."

"If something happens I'm blaming you," said Victor with a chuckle.

"You go ahead and do that," Ryo placed her arms around his neck and leaned inward to him. Right before she was about to kiss him, however, Victor placed a hand in between them and in that hand held the box he had hidden away moments before.

"I know you love bracelets, but I was wondering if you might like this for a change," Victor said with a confident smile that was only a mask to hide how nervous he actually was.

"Victor, I… Victor!" Ryo gasped as he paled and then fainted onto the floor. Several of the windows were then broken out by a crashing force and Ryo soon found herself knocked out cold as well.

The next morning, a Paris airport:

"So, any idea what you want to see, Dako?" Leo asked, briefly looking up from one of Max's cheap novels. Zenigata had forbade any study books whatsoever on their trip.

Dako was holding on to Avery on her lap, and she gave a shrug as she bounced him upon her knee, the little boy laughing in response. He now seemed to at least comprehend some basic signs; the entire family was learning the language, and Leo was shocked to see Max excel in it. He didn't say anything out loud to Zenigata, but he wondered exactly how much Max hid in the way of intelligence.

"Back," Max slid back into his seat and placed an arm behind Leo's chair, "Are you sure you'll be okay to travel like this, Leo?"

"Max, I'll be fine," Leo replied with a laugh as he closed the novel and leaned back into Max's side, the good side with the unbroken things. Zenigata still wore a cast upon his wrist, and his chest had been bound tightly.

"You know I worry," Max reached across Leo and signed something simple to Avery, and the little boy's mouth opened and he giggled in response.

"He likes it when you do that, what sign is that?" asked Leo, pushing up his glasses.

"Orange duck," Max signed out as he spoke the words to Leo. He chuckled as Leo groaned, and kissed him on the cheek. "Like father, like son."

"Hrm?" Leo looked down at his cell phone and blinked at the number.

"It's your sister," said Max as he glanced over the number.

"How did you even…?"

"Just answer it, Leo," Max said quietly. "We owe her that much."

"Allo?" Leo sighed and leaned his chin upon his free hand. "What? Fuji? He's gone?... What, him, too? Yeah, that is weird… Well, she got out okay, right? Good…" Leo stopped as he heard their flight called and sighed. "Listen, I've gotta go, that's our flight. Keep me posted, and if you need my help, let me know." He hung up the phone and turned to Max, "We've got two relatives missing right now. No one knows what happened to either of them… And for some reason which I'll ask her later about Ryo was in Mexico with Victor. But now he's gone, and luckily Ryo was able to get out of Mexico okay."

"Who's the other relative?" Max inquired.

"A half-brother of Fuji's and myself," Leo replied. "He stood Dori up a few nights ago, so he's in deep trouble with her…. Americans, heh."

"You've got siblings?" Max asked with a blink.

"Yeah, a ton, probably," Leo responded as he put away his cell phone and leaned back. "Not like I'll ever meet them, though."

"I would've killed for a sibling around my age," said Max with a small smile.

"Why didn't your parents have one, then?"

"I screwed up my mom's hips when I was born, plus I was so much of a hellraiser, I was enough for Mom and Dad. And remember they were a lot older when they had me…"

"Well, at least you know Ave won't be lonely," Leo smiled and took hold of one of his son's hands and smiled.

"Yeah, who knows, maybe I'll get you pregnant yet," said Max with a small smirk and a wink. Leo rolled his eyes and shook his head.

"…Don't even joke about that. I'm a Lupin, strange things like that happen to me all of the time."

"Could we get going?" Dako was already at the security checkpoint, and her fathers and brother soon joined her, and they were on the plane.

"Hey, guys, I'll be right back," said Leo in a quiet mutter.

"Is something wrong?" asked Max as he looked over to Leo, who had paled reasonably.

"No… Nothing… I'll be fine…" Leo rose and shuffled back to the bathroom, opening the door and then closing it behind him. He placed a hand upon his head and rubbed his eyes and then looked in the mirror, and was muffled before he could scream in surprise at the black-cloaked figure behind him. He soon fainted, and then the cloaked figure set aside the entire top of the sink and let another cloaked figure lower him down and place him in a crate. He was then lifted onto a luggage terminal by two coconspirators in airline uniform, and driven across the runway.

Some time later:

"My friggin' head…" Leo moaned. "Dako? Max….? Avery…?"

"No one here by that name, Mate," Leo opened his eyes and saw a man looking back down at him against what looked to be a gray sky. Around his neck was a metal collar with a tag that read '5' on a bronze tag.

Leo sat up on the sandy beach and blinked a few times, reaching to adjust his reading glasses only to find them gone. The man in front of him smiled and kneeled down beside Leo, "They took you from your family?"

"I was on a plane! How'd they get me off of a plane? Unless…. Who even did this?" Leo wondered aloud.

"Your guess is as good as mine," Leo looked over his shoulder and saw Jordan standing with his hands in his pockets, and a collar about his neck with a tag that read '4' on it. "This guy and I were looking all through this place for a way out."

"We been all through here and no luck so far," the man answered in what Leo recognized as an Irish accent, "M'name's Gabe, by the way. You must be Lupin the Fourth."

"Huh? Oh, yeah… Well, sorta… How'd you know?"

"I'm a journalist, friend. It's my business to know these things," Gabe answered with a chuckle and a smile. "I guess I'm sorta the type you usually avoid. I actually covered your trial all of those months back. Slept outside of the courthouse for three whole days!"

"Is there anyone else here?" Leo clutched onto his now aching skull and tried to fight off an approaching headache.

"Yeah, over a dozen of us until this morning. You're number fifteen, it seems," said Gabe as he briefly took hold of Leo's tag to read it. "These collars don't come off, by the by."

"We've tried everything," Jordan added with a sigh.

"Well, does anyone have any idea what they mean?" Leo asked as he looked down at his own number.

"Not a bloody clue," answered Gabe. "We're thinking it has something to do with age… Well, we were, until that one bloke and then that kid showed up."

"Huh?" Leo was truly puzzled by this, and looked back to Jordan for further answers.

"Victor and some kid named Jared," Jordan answered with a shrug. "They've got different collars than us… Victor's 'R1' and Jared's 'A1'… We still haven't figured out what the hell those are supposed to mean, and we've got a Navy code cracker here!"

"Jared?" Leo blinked a few times as he registered this name, "There's no way…."

"No way what, Leo?" asked Jordan as he approached Lupin and helped him to stand.

"It's nothing," Leo answered with a shake of the head. "Does anyone even know where we are?"

"All we found was a sign that said 'Wolf Island'. I've never even heard of the place, and I was under the impression I'd been almost everywhere," Gabe answered as he walked shoulder-to-shoulder in between Leo and Jordan, although he was the smallest among them.

"Wolf Island? I've never even heard of it," Leo admitted.

"No one has, making me believe this is some kind of a private island," Jordan placed his hands in his pocket and kicked up a little sand. He took a few more steps forward and tripped over what the others first thought to be driftwood, but upon further inspection they found to be Fuji with a collar also around her neck that read '16'.

"Fuji?" Leo bent down and shook his sister gently.

"Yeah, I'm fine, too," Jordan muttered and stood up, dusted himself clean of sand and then poked Fuji in the side with his boot gently. "Wakey, wakey!"

"Hm… I've got it," Leo smiled and laughed, and changed the pitch of his voice to a serious and doctorly tone. "Miss Lupin, we're pleased to inform you that it's twins."

"GYA!" Fuji jerked up from the sand and looked about dazed while still panting heavily. She glared at Leo and slapped him a few times, hard. "You jerk! How dare you even joke about that with me! Where are we, anyway?"

"That's what we're trying to figure out, Fuji," Leo answered as he guarded himself from Fuji's blows. "Ow! Would you stop!"

"I take it she's your sister," said Gabe with a warm smile. "Pleasure to meet you, Lupin."

"Thanks," Fuji discontinued her pummeling of Leo and shook Gabe's hand, and smiled at her brother as Gabe kissed it. "See, some of us are gentlemen, Ari."

"You were always the better at that than me, Fuji," Leo said with a chuckle. He looked over to Gabe and shoved his hands in his pocket. "Let's get together with the others. We might be able to work something out, like how to get out of here. You said there was a guy in the Navy here? Maybe he's got some idea of where exactly we are. I'll explain all of to this to Fuji while you show me where everyone is."

Gabe nodded, and led the three to a large bunker, where there were over a dozen people inside on cots, all of various ethnicities and professions. There were people from Japan, China, Spain, South America, and even one from a country in the Middle East called Qatar. They were professors, assassins, doctors, musicians, and one, from Germany, was a priest. Leo attempted to speak with them in their native tongues, but was pleasantly surprised to find them all well versed in English.

"We found another while you were out," the priest said as he seated himself next to a young man on a cot who wore a '17' upon his collar. The priest himself, in addition to his white collar, wore a '10'. "We think he's American, or Canadian… We haven't decided yet."

Fuji and Jordan looked over the young man while Leo walked right past them and straight to Victor, who was sitting on his cot and converging with a Romanian missionary. "I have a few questions for you," said Leo quietly to Victor.

"Hrm?" Victor looked upward at Leo and took another puff of his cigarette and gave a smile. "So nice of you to join us…"

"When we get off of this island, I want you to stay as far away from Ryo as you can. She doesn't need creeps like you around her."

"You know, if there wasn't a kid present, I'd knock your lights out where you stand. How you even have the nerve to preach to me like I'm some kind of teenager is beyond me. You're not Ryo's father, and you're not her boyfriend anymore, so you stay out of something that's between the both of us…. Should we even be arguing about this right now?"

"Yes," said Leo in a hiss.

"Hey, just because you kill a guy doesn't mean you can go pushing around anyone," said Victor, his smug expression unfailing.

"I don't want you to touch her," Leo said warningly.

"Go sit in a corner and think about going down on your boyfriend, like I'm sure you do an awful lot nowadays," Victor leaned forward and set his feet upon the floor. Fuji and Jordan both rose and prepared for the fight they knew was about to come, Fuji reaching for one of her weapons but finding it gone. Upon further inspection, she found that all of her weapons had been taken.

"I always did love a good boxing match," Gabe muttered with heavy sarcasm as he seated himself on the top bunk, in order to protect himself from the fight he knew was about to come.

"Don't you dare talk about Max like that," Leo snapped.

"You know," Victor kicked up his heels and rose from his bed and removed a cigarette from a pack in his jean pocket. "You're a day late and a dime short on threatening me about Ryo," Victor leaned forward and whispered to Leo. "I proposed to her, you fairy. Now what are you going to do, bitch slap me? It'd sure as hell be appropriate coming from you…. Tell me, does Max ever let you on top?"

Leo, at that point, blanked out, only to come back to as Jordan pulled him away from Victor while the priest took hold of Victor and drug him across the opposite side of the room.

"Knock it off!" Jordan snapped to both of them, and then looked about the bunker. "Where's the code cracker?"

"Right here," a black woman with a '12' about her neck held up her hand and then walked over to them. She was still in her Navy uniform, and spoke with an Australian accent. She approached Jordan, stopping and standing beside him. "I'm afraid I can't break up these two."

"You don't need to," Jordan answered with a shake of the head, and turned to her. "This is Leo Lupin, he's a translator. Hopefully he'll be able to make some sense of what you found."

"Come here, Mr. Lupin," she beckoned him over and seated herself at a small table with folding chairs in the back of the bunker. Gabe and Jordan let go of their grasp upon Leo, and Lupin nodded and seated himself next to her. "We found this map while we were searching this place for an escape. I'm hoping you're familiar with this language, because we have all six livable continents represented here, and no one can make heads or tails of it."

"I'll try… But I lost my reading glasses," said Leo with a cringe as he remembered that he had lost these long ago.

"I'm just wondering what the hell these are for," Fuji muttered as she ran a finger over the metal ring about her neck.

"We was thinking tracking devices," Gabe answered as he allowed the priest to deal with Victor and he himself walked over to the bunk where a young boy sat in a corner, looking over everyone silently.

"Here, use mine," the code cracker removes a pair of black plastic glasses from a pocket in her blazer and passed them to Leo. "Maybe, on an off chance, they'll work. Mister Gabriel also lost his, and he was able to use them."

"You don't say…." Leo muttered numbly and took the glasses, blinking a few times and then frowning with heightened interest as he found that they indeed helped. He looked downward at the map, and after scanning it over gave a heavy sigh.

"Let me guess, it's a super hard language and it'll take you all night to figure it out?" Fuji said with a smile of hope as she walked over to Leo and placed her hands on his shoulders.

"No, it's not that…." Leo said with a shake of the head. "I don't even know what it is!"

"What?" Fuji shrieked, causing several people in the room to shudder at its shrillness. "What the hell do you mean by THAT?"

"Exactly what I said, I can't translate what I don't know, Fuji!" Leo sat back and gave a frustrated sigh. He removed his glasses and turned to the Australian, "Sorry, um—"

"Alsenia," she answered after a pause.

"….Nice name," Leo muttered.

"Mum said I was named after my father."

"And who was he?" Leo inquired.

Alsenia gave a shrug, "Damned if I know. That's one of the few things we have in common. None of us know our father, or, in some causes, either of our parents. We're also all clinical geniuses with poor vision."

"Great, a bunch of educated bastards," Victor chuckled.

"Yeah, you're a bastard too, but in a different sense!" shouted Fuji. "Although I have serious doubts that your mom planned for you, either."

"You aren't allowed to speak of my mother!" Victor hissed and he stood. The priest went to grab onto him once again, but Victor turned and spat to him viciously, "Don't you have a little boy to go find?" and then Lupin turned about and found a corner of the room to reside in.

"Well, maybe it's code," Leo rubbed his head tiredly and rocked it back and forth slowly. "Like, I don't know… Alsenia, do you think you could go through some of the codes you know and see if it's a variation on any of them?"

"Certainly," Alsenia gave a nod and turned her attention back to the map.

Leo then looked to the priest, "What's your name?"

"Father Peter Walker," Peter replied.

"Well, Peter, do you think you could stay and watch over the new guy here?" Leo rose and pointed down the young man on the cot. Peter gave a nod and turned away from Victor toward the still unconscious young man.

"What would you have me do?" Gabe asked from his position on the cot with the sullen young boy.

"Exactly what you're doing now," Leo replied and then looked to Victor. "And I want you to stay here with Peter, Gabe, the kid and the sick guy. You're a jerk, but you're an effective fighter. If anyone tries to start anything, you'd be the one to take them out, Victor…. You need to work with me if you want to see Ryo again."

"Hrm," Victor narrowed his eyes at Leo. "I still don't like listening to you."

"I'm a good protector, too, Ari, and I'm more trustworthy," Jordan said suddenly. "Let me watch over all of them. We don't know if he's working with whoever did this."

"And why in the hell would I get a bunch of people I don't know all together in the middle of nowhere?" Victor asked as he tilted his head to a side.

"I need you to spilt up into two groups with Fuji, Jordan," Leo continued, ignoring Victor's comment and Jordan's glare which followed. "You guys look around the island."

"And what about you, Mr. Lupin?" Alsenia asked as she looked up from her map.

"Well, there's got to be a main power source somewhere," Leo answered with a shrug as he removed his purple jacket and orange tie, leaving him in his black dress shirt and jeans. He continued as he rolled up the sleeves to his shirt. "And I'm going to find it."

"Noooo way," Fuji shook her head. "Send me or Jordan. We've got a lot less to lose!"

"She's right," Jordan admitted hesitantly. "One of us should go instead. You've got a family to think about."

Leo turned to Jordan and sighed, "I'm not a kid, I don't need protecting. I can do this," he stepped out of the bunker without another word to either of them and went in search of a power resource. What he failed to tell them was that his wound was still healing, and without the medicine the doctor had given him, he was in a great deal of pain. Every step for him felt like a replay of the night he had been stepped, but he ignored this as best as possible. He had to find some way to get back to his family, that was all that mattered now.


	27. He Ain't Heavy He's my Brother

DISCLAIMER: Yeah… Don't own it… La di da dum da… What? Were you expecting something witty? It's the middle of the week… Shoo… I'm too tired for funny.

Hallo!

Gwwa… I need to quit the two weeks of nothing and then dropping another chapter routine… I'd ideally love to get back to writing one chapter a week, like in the old days. I need to quit slacking… Well, aside from that, everyone seems to love to hate Victor… I know a lot of people hate him, but I personally love him. I love writing for him… He's such a jerk, I don't know where the appeal is, but I guess I just like the bad guys. Enough of that, enjoy the chapter! Sorry it was a while in progress… Hopefully that Scrapbook story'll be done soon. I think I'll go work on that now. Who needs to do math homework—HA! Bye!

Fun fact of Boredom: If these chapters seem longer than when you starting reading the first series, you aren't imagining things. Whereas usual chapters used to run six to seven pages, the usual now is eleven to twelve.

Chapter Twenty-seven: He Ain't Heavy…. He's my Brother

"I don't see why they sent me with you…" Victor grumbled darkly and stumbled a bit in the rain forest surroundings. He fell into Leo, who turned around and gave Victor a warning glare. "I guess I should be glad I'm a relative of yours; you're not that sick, Ari."

"My name's Leo," Leo answered quickly as he tore through more thick vines and continued to trace back lines which he hoped would run to a main power source. "And the fact that you'd even suggest that is sick."

"Well, your ex seems to like me," said Victor as he shoved his hands in his pockets. "….She loves you, though," he added darkly and looked over to Leo. "You have no idea what it is to love someone and then hear them call you someone else."

"You know what love is? Victor, I'm impressed," Leo admitted.

"I do love her. I'd kill for her, I'd put myself in harms way for her. The former I've offered and the latter I've done more than she knows," Victor continued. "I'm willing to give up anything for that woman, even if it meant giving up being a thief."

"How did it even happen? I mean, you two…. I thought you liked Odori."

"Hrm, I only liked messing with her because of how touchy she was about everything… It all changed after she had her child. Besides, I knew at that moment that one day her child would be grown and in the Ishikawa tradition come after my blood for dishonoring her mother…. Now, as for me and Ryoko… She… She looks like she needs someone. And—Why am I even telling you this?"

"I have no idea," Leo admitted with a shake of the head. A small smile grew upon his face, and he continued through the brush, "Better me than Fuji, though… She'd bag on you for going on like a giddy little school girl."

"Giddy?" Victor snapped and stopped in the middle of the pathway he and his cousin were creating. "I'm not giddy! I thought you hated me for seeing her!"

"Yeah, but I kinda like that snake next to you… He likes you, too," Leo smiled, and watched as Victor shrieked and jumped back from the python and into Leo.

"You JERK!" Victor shouted, "You near-sighted, man-whoring bitch! Why'd you do that to me?"

"Because it's funny," Leo replied with a shrug, and turned back to the brush ahead of them. He was unprepared for a steep fall in front of him, and went sliding down steeply about twenty feet before stopping inches from a large tree.

"Ha ha," he could hear Victor say in the distance.

Meanwhile, in the bunker, the young man they had rescued from the beach had come to, and Gabe immediately went to his side. Jared was a little more than weary of the Irishman, and spoke to him very little.

"How you doin' there, chum?" asked Gabe as he felt the man's pulse and then forehead.

"Been better," he answered as he sat up in his bed. "Any idea where we are?"

"That's what I've been trying to figure out all morning," Alsenia muttered from her place at the map.

Peter, who had sat silently by the unnamed man, quietly rose to get him water from the bathroom at the end of the bunker. He disappeared into the back room for a few moments and then handed him a glass of lukewarm water upon his return, "Here. Drink."

"Do I know you?" the man wondered aloud as he looked over at Gabe while sipping his water. Gabe, in turn, grew outwardly nervous and shook his head.

"Nah, don't think you do," Gabe replied quickly and rose to check in more with Jared.

"Are you sure?" he asked with a frown. "You look really familiar, like I worked with you once."

"Yes, what do you do, Gabe?" Alsenia asked as she set down her glasses and looked upward at him with interest.

Gabe turned about and begun nervously, "Well, I—"

"GAGHHHHHHHHHH!" Fuji came bounding through the door, never quitting her run until she fell right into the unsuspecting Peter. The priest tumbled, and only opened his eyes to come face-to-face with Fuji's chest. He turned bright red and quickly sat up upon his elbows.

"What's wrong? Where's the rest of your group?" asked Gabe, secretly glad that Fuji had come to save him an explanation.

"I left them with Jordan's group," Fuji responded as she sat back, allowing Peter to wriggle away from her and go back to tending to their last member. "And I went looking for Ari and Victor… It was Jordan's idea, he wanted to make sure neither of them had killed one another yet… Well, I…. Let's just say we aren't alone on the island."

"You know, a guy says he hates bloody _Lost _and it comes back 'round to bite him in his ass!" Gabe sighed and tossed his arms up into the air.

"I managed to pull this off of one of them," Fuji smiled and pulled out of her jacket a long knife. Peter bent down in front of her and studied it a moment, briefly looking at his own mixed-race features in its reflection.

"We shouldn't use violence," Peter said in a mumble.

"You know, Father, that'd be great, except for the fact that they're attacking us," Fuji said with slight annoyance as she rose. She had never particularly cared for pacifists. "And anyway, Peter, you look like you've done some fighting, yourself."

"Only what was asked of me," Peter responded.

"Hey, new guy!" Fuji turned her attention to the dark-haired boy on the bed and seated herself on its edge. "So you got a name?"

"Chris," he replied as he took another sip of the water Father Gabe had given him. "You're Lupin the Fourth…"

"The one and… Well, I can't say only," Fuji chuckled. "Anyone here care to fill him in on what's been going on? I really don't feel like a synopsis right now."

"Yeah, I'll take care of that… I'm a journalist, we're good at condensing the truth," Gabe pulled a chair over to Chris's bed while the young man's vision veered off to Jordan, who had not let his bed since he had been brought to the island.

"Nothing," Jordan sighed and stepped into the bunker with the group he had taken with him a few hours after Chris woke. "Absolutely friggin' nothing!"

"Friggin'? Jeeze, even after all of these years Yukiko's never far from your mind," Fuji gave a chuckle and did not even bother to look up at the table, where Jordan could tell she was working on something… What, however, he had no idea. If it was Fuji, he didn't even _want _to know.

"Is that everyone?" Chris asked Gabe quietly.

"Nah, there's two missing, still. Look like a couple of doppelgangers, them," Gabe replied in a mutter. "I'm gonna check on the kid."

"Yeah, he probably needs it more than anyone…." Chris muttered and looked over at the darkened features of the standoffish boy. "…I think I'll mingle."

"Yeah, you do that, man," Gabe patted him on the shoulder, and Chris studied the Irish man carefully, and then the priest, and then the others who had strolled in afterward. There was a connection, he knew. Hopefully from talking he'd be able to figure out exactly what that connection was.

The other side of the island:

"Say it…" said Victor.

"No!"

"Come on…. You know it's true…"

"Damn it, Victor, do you—"

"So it is true?"

"Yeah, yeah, fine, okay?" Leo growled and threw up his hands in frustration, "I got us lost, all right!... Happy?"

"I'd be happier back at that blasted tin can," Victor admitted as he watched thick storm clouds move in around them as they continued their trek down the thick forest path. "Although I'd be most happy at home…"

"Yeah, I'm sure your mother loves it every time she sees your face grace her doorway," Leo muttered.

Victor gave a glare and hissed, "I only wish she could. My mother's totally blind, you son of a bitch."

Leo stopped dead in his tracks and gulped, "Ohh… I, um, had no idea that those were the circumstances… I always thought your dad married Michi Mine…"

"Michi left him when he needed her most, and my mother was there to pick up the pieces," Victor continued to trudge along, keeping a good distance from Leo now. "I hate Fuji mainly because she looks like her."

"And you hate me because I look like your dad?"

"No, I hate you because I hate you," Victor replied. "You seriously want to know what I think of you, Ari? I think you run away when things get too hard for you. You snap like a pole under the slightest pressure. I think you're weak. I think you're a little girl."

"Excuse me! One week of my life and you'd go home crying, Victor!"

"Yeah, well I'm sure if I got it from where you do I'd be sore for a while, too," Victor muttered and removed a cigarette from his pack.

"I've got two kids at home… One's deaf and the other's standing to get curious about things I can't even answer! I've got Zenigata at home, who I love, but we're going through a rough time, yeah, I'll admit it. I'm not even sure whether to stay with Interpol at this point, and I already had to give up one of the jobs I was doing… Sixteen languages and I hardly ever get to use any of them anymore. I'm just Inspector Lupin, Papa, Mankii-chan, now. At first I was trying to run away from Ari, but now I don't even have time for him."

"You're Mankii-chan?" Victor blinked and nearly swallowed his cigarette. "You're kidding… You do voiceovers? Damn it, you really are gay with a vengeance."

"Shush," Leo placed a hand on Victor's shoulder and stopped dead in the middle of the forest, "…What is that?"

"Sounds like a koto…" Victor murmured, "You know, the Japanese instrument…"

"Yeah, I know that… How do_ you_ know that?"

"Had one at the house laying around. I picked it up… I'm not half bad," Victor replied with a shrug.

"Shhh…" Leo began to step quietly towards the noise, creeping as lightly as possible beneath the underbrush. Victor walked beside him, and when Leo stepped into the well-hidden net and went flying up into the air, Victor did, too. Their skulls first collided with one another as they were thrown together in the next and then against the tree branch as the net bounced up and then swung a bit.

"You must be snakebit, Victor," Leo muttered as he rubbed his head in an attempt to make the stars in his eyes vanish.

"I see we caught two in the pack," they heard in a laugh. In the position that they were in, however, it was impossible to see who was speaking. When the net was cut from the tree, and they both went falling to the ground, however, they were able to get a better look at the tall Italian amongst a group of men in kimonos. "Some of the premium wolves…" He added as he bent down and lifted up Leo's chin. Victor, who was on top of Leo, kicked with his foot and his boot made contact with the back of the man's head.

"Little bastard!" the Italian pulled Victor over Leo and raised Lupin above the ground, "If you weren't one of the more expensive ones, I'd shoot you dead!"

"More expensive?" Leo muttered as the Italian then lifted him by the back of the neck and walked the two into a large glass and steel structure. They were walked into a room that looked like it would house a Japanese tea ceremony and seated in front of the Italian with their hands on the back of their necks. The Italian was in the center of a semi-circle of the Japanese men in black kimonos, and there was an armed guard in an unrecognizable uniform with a gun to either Lupin's head.

"Just proving that you could make it here is a testament to the potential of the others, although the tall blonde and the one with the large bust are just as effective," the Italian explained.

"Would someone care to explain what's going on?" Victor asked with a growl, only to feel the barrel of the gun against his head.

"Victor, knock it off or they'll kill you, you idiot!" Leo snapped.

"They won't kill us… I don't know why, but they won't kill us," Victor looked to the Italian and studied him with deep concentration.

"You're right, Mister Lupin," the Italian smiled. "I worked too hard to find all of you… And if you two have a few moments, I'll explain it."

"I don't think we have anywhere else to be," Leo said as he glanced once again at the armed guard.

The Bunker:

Chris studied Gabe's movements as compared to Jordan's. He then switched over to Peter, who was speaking with a woman in a head covering. Alsenia was taking a small break with the doctor of the group, and Fuji was exchanging stories with the assassin, who was from France.

"Hey," he said suddenly. "Who had a parent involved in the crime world?"

Many looked to him like he had said something terribly inappropriate, and a few, like Peter, turned pale at these words.

"Just asking," Chris said with a shrug. "I might have figured out the connection is all…"

"Well, my mother did some spy work for Germany…" Peter admitted uncomfortably.

"And maybe… Just maybe… IRA connections run in my family," Gabe said as he cleared his throat and looked about the room nervously.

"Well, my mom was pretty decent… Just ran with some wrong crowds is all," Jordan shrugged.

"Was Lupin the Third among them?" Chris sat up on the bed and set his feet down, clasping his hands together and looking upward at the tall blonde with a sense of scrutiny.

"Yeah, well, he's my biological dad," Jordan looked downward as if there was some difficulty involved in saying this.

"Then that's definitely the connection," Chris nodded.

"What are you talking about?" Fuji inquired, turning away from the assassin and taking a step forward toward Chris.

"He's my biological father, too," Chris explained. Fuji looked at the sixteen on her collar, and then at Chris' seventeen, and felt her stomach sink.

"Wait a second," Gabe looked back at Alsenia, and blinked.

"…._What_?" Alsenia narrowed her eyes, almost as if she were daring Gabe to continue.

"Eh… Nothin'…" Gabe replied with a light chuckle.

"Like she said, she's named after her father, and L's and R's sound alike…" Chris said with a shrug. "Arsenia."

"Thank God for language consistencies," muttered Alsenia with a roll of the eyes. "I probably would've shot myself… I always thought his name was Alex."

"Wait! This is all wrong! There is no chance of a relation!" Peter shouted. "I cannot be…"

"Why not?" Jordan frowned.

"Because that man is a thief!" Peter snapped.

"Yeah, who your mom probably loved at one point," Fuji concluded.

Peter's face reddened a little and he grit his teeth together, "I know I am a bastard, I have come to terms with this, but there is no way that I am the son of a thief!"

"Listen, you collar-wearing God jockey," Jordan poked Peter in the chest and leaned down to face the reasonably shorter man. "You've never even met him!"

"Aye, I have," Gabe placed his hands in his pockets and approached Peter. "He's a good man, Pete."

"Yeah, right!" Peter snorted. "My mother would never have anything to do with his kind!"

"You hold him, Gabriel, I'll punch him," Jordan muttered. "I don't care if I didn't meet him until I was almost seventeen, I'll still defend him any day."

"Now, come on, guys, there's gotta be a way to sort this out differently," Fuji nervously spoke as she placed herself in between the two. "Can't we all just have a nice family reunion?"

"What about that boy?" Alsenia nodded to the silent Jared in his corner. "Is he a relative, too?"

"Yeah, but I don't think he's related to us in the same way," Chris said with a nod.

"He says he's from the 'Fuma' Clan," Gabe explained, turning his angry down and looking away from the priest. "I don't think Lu—Eh, Da, would have anything to do with them…"

"Fuma? What is…. This is starting to make some sense, and if what I think happened actually did happen, I'm going to kick myself for giving this kid away. I'll talk to him," Fuji whispered, and perched herself on the bed next to Jared. "Hey, sweetie. Do you remember me?"

"Yeah," Jared nodded quietly. "You're Ari's sister…"

"Sure am," Fuji winked at him and looked down at his collar briefly before looking upward at him once again. "What's with the samurai act? You aren't Toshiro's kid, are you?"

"No," Jared looked away toward a wall. "I just miss my dad… I don't want to be here. I'll bet he's on his way to find me!"

Fuji bit her lip as she looked down at the collar, "Jare, I think that there was a mistake on which Asian guy your dad was…"

"Huh?" Jared blinked and turned to her. "What do you mean?"

"Well, I—" Fuji was stopped at the doors swung open and Victor and Leo went crashing in, their arms bound behind their backs. "Crap… What the heck happened to both of you guys?" Fuji hopped off of the bunk and went to cutting the ropes off of one with a knife, and then tossed Jordan the knife to cut the ropes on Victor.

"Something tells me I shouldn't be doing this for you," Jordan muttered to Victor as he fixed the knife in his belt and helped him to rise. "I think I'll save that rope so in case you piss me off again I'll make a noose for you."

"The more and more we watch you the more and more we're convinced you each have one of his personality traits," the Italian entered the room and smiled as he looked over the family reunion. "As intelligent as you all are, you must've figured out what connects you all… What trouble DNA can get you in, hrm?"

"You jerk!" Fuji began to storm forward, only to be pulled back by Jordan.

"Very wise, Mister Lupin…. You wouldn't want anything to happen to someone you love…." the Italian smirked. "And I'd be careful of what you do, yourself… You wouldn't want something to happen to your husband or children."

"Crap! You really are gay? I thought ole' blue eyes here was just joking with you!" Gabe said to Leo as he pointed to Victor.

"Well, hee hee… It's a long story," Leo admitted sheepishly.

"Okay, could someone explain to us what's going on?" Jordan asked annoyedly.

"I wouldn't get too cocky, Mister Lupin… You have someone you love, too," said the Italian sternly. Jordan clenched his jaw and let out a low inaudible growl. "Even if she did leave you for a Broadway actor. How's it feel to be left for someone who played the lead in _Miss Saigon_? I'll bet that still stings… He was good enough to marry, you weren't…. I'm sure there's an interesting story there."

"I didn't get that, but I know that's bloody low," Gabe murmured as he cringed at Jordan's expression.

"It's so good my wolf pack's together," the Italian smiled and began to pace. "You all have superior abilities, due mainly to your genetics… We believe with some fostering these talents can be brought to the forefront…"

"And we'll make great soldiers," Leo concluded. "All for a profit, of course…"

The Italian smiled, "Aren't you the bright little bulb? Yes, we based this attack after an old idea of M. Victor Lupin."

"Oh, I thought this seemed familiar," Victor murmured. "Not even I could get the proper funding though…. How in the hell did you manage?"

"You stick 'children's orphanage donations' on a box, put a few sad pictures on there, and everybody comes running to give you money…"

"Okay, that's low, even by my standards," said Victor in a hiss. He looked over to Jordan, "Come on, I know you want to kill this bastard as much as I do."

Leo remembered donating to several of these organizations, and wondering if any of them had contributed to his being brought to Wolf Island. He cringed at the irony, and began to question once again whether his mother had been right when she had once called him naive.

"I'm agreed with you on that one," Jordan said to Victor. "But what in the hell can we do when he has something over each of our heads?"

"Hey, I'll fight you, ya son of a bitch!" Gabe shouted. "I ain't got no one! Come on, then! Let's have it!"

"You touch me, and I kill the boy," said the Italian. "He's probably just as much of a defect as his brother and we just don't know it yet."

"Brother?" Jared muttered beneath his breath.

"Wait until they leave," Chris had risen from the bed, and was no whispering to Leo. Lupin nodded in silent reply, and continued to silently watch the Italian.

"You're more than welcome to try to leave—I'll consider it your training," said the Italian with a smile. "Dinner's through those back doors… Enjoy, my treat."

They watched the Italian exited, and Fuji turned away from the door and frowned, "Okay, now we've got to think of a way out of this rat trap…"

"I've got a few ideas," Chris raised his hand and gave a weak smile.

"Kid, we are all ears at this point," Jordan stepped toward the younger boy and placed his hands in his pockets.

"Let's get dinner, first," Alsenia rose from her seat and walked toward the back of the bunker. "I'm sure some here are hungry, and children especially need to eat."

"No, we'll have to start right away," Chris rose and sprung forward with an energy none had known he had possessed. He spoke in a low whisper as he removed the top sheet from his bed and began to collect the others. "It's all dependant on who's willing to go."

"Me, Victor and Jordan'll go," Leo said quickly as he followed Chris from bunk to bunk, passing off the sheets he was handed to Fuji, who was also following them to hear this plan.

"I love how he just volunteers us for these things…" Victor muttered to Jordan.

"Do you think you can make a rope of this?" Chris asked Fuji as she took hold of the last sheet.

"Are you kidding, I was almost a friggin' girl scout!" Fuji chuckled. She sat down on Jare's bunk and smiled at the young boy. "You want to give me a hand? I'm sure time with the Fuma clan resulted in you knowing at least a few sailor's knots…."

"How do you know them?" Jared picked up the other end of one sheet and began to attach it to another one.

"Eh, I knew a lot of sailors…." Fuji shrugged. "That Chris kid's definitely blood… He's got that look in his eye that my dad always had when he was working on a plan…"

"Now what?" Leo stood back from Chris and folded his arms.

Chris looked Leo up and down and spoke in an even tone, "I'll need three cocoanuts, a bunch of blankets and what you're wearing…"

"Woah, what!" Leo yelped.

"I haven't heard a request like that since I went to Mexico," Gabe said with a chuckle to Peter.

"They are all mad," Peter murmured.

"Pete, I love you like a brother, 'cause you are one, but climb offa your cross for three seconds," said Gabe with a slightly annoyed tone.

"You better be right about this, and you're not doing this for a laugh," said Jordan warningly.

"Trust me, I map stuff like this out all of the time," said Chris as he looked about the bunker. "I always loved strategy games…"

"Well, this isn't a game…" Victor said with a glare.

"Shut up and take off your pants, Lupin, before someone makes you… I'll go get the cocoanuts," Alsenia, who was a good foot taller than Victor, said on her way out the door.

"I hate these stories… They always involve someone making a raft and killing a boar and whatnot," Gabe muttered absently.

"I think the only beast that willed be killed will be the blue-eyed man, if he keeps up what he is doing," Peter said quietly in response to Gabe's rhetoric.

Interpol headquarters:

"I don't… Get it…." Max laid his head upon the desk, and sighed. "How… In the hell… Does someone just vanish?"

"I don't know," Heiji sighed without looking up from the large filing cabinet. There were stacks of files all about him in growing numbers as he continued to search through the cabinets while Max did the phone work. Avery was in a playpen in a corner of the office next to Max's desk, and Dako was helping Heiji search through files. Max raised an eyebrow as he looked over and saw the little girl looking over at Heiji once again. This was the third time he had caught her doing this, and he was starting to worry. His gaze then turned to a photograph on his desk of his family, and he sighed as he briefly picked it up and looked it over.

"You know, a lot of people have gone missing… Fuji's missing, Jordan's missing… A guy who worked for the IRA is gone—He was one of the heads of it. A woman who worked planting bombs for the Australian Navy… A priest who was reported to be in cahoots with a group of guys who goes out murdering Neo Nazis…"

"I like that priest guy," Max mumbled as the phone rang once again and he went to answering it, "Allo?"

"Hey, Max?" it was his father-in-law on the other line. "Do… Do you think I could come down to your offices? I think I have a lead on why all of those people are missing…"

"Sure thing!" Max swiveled around in his chair and looked to Dako. "Make coffee, your Grandpa's coming over," he ordered her quietly.

"All right," Dako nodded and looked to Heiji. "Do you need anything?"

"Eh, no… I'm fine…" Heiji blinked and looked up from his filing, "Thanks, though…" He watched the little girl exit the office and then turned to Max. "….Does she…?"

"You betcha," Max sighed and hung up the phone; Lupin had already hung up on his end moments before. "She's been looking at boys more and more… "

"Isn't a crush on me slightly incestuous?... You know what that word means, r—"

"Of course I do! And no, it's not. She's adopted," Max opened another folder as he searched for a number in vain. "…."

"You're worried about him, huh?" Heiji sighed and rubbed his forehead tiredly. The files would be given a rest for a few moments. "I'm worried about Fuji… We may not like one another, but we both love a Lupin."

"Wait—You love Fuji? I always thought it was just a fling…"

"Of course, I'd give anything I could to know that she was safe," Heiji answered tiredly. "I'm sure you wish the same about Leo…"

Max gave a nod, "You're damn right… I don't know how he took care of these kids without me… I guess this is the crappiest way possible of me finally getting to bond with them…"

"Three coffees," Dako bustled back through the door, which a familiar older gentleman held open for her.

"Interpol's hiring younger and younger, I see," said Lupin the Third with a smile. "I had to make it out as soon as possible without Fujiko knowing where I was headed to. I didn't want her to be here for this… Good thing you told me I could come; I was already outside the door when I called you," he gave a sigh and seated himself across from Max's desk. "…Even after all of these years I still get this deer-in-the-headlights expression from all of the people who have been here more than thirty years…"

"Well, can you blame them? Who'd want a guy who's been a thief for half a century?" Max said with a laugh.

"You know damn well that I work for the government now, son," said Lupin with a frown, as if he himself was not pleased with this idea. "I test out their new anti-thieving systems and locks for flaws, and I stay out of trouble, and I get to give Fuji and her friends a place for sanctuary at any of my estates. It's a pretty good deal, all things considering…"

"Mister Lupin—"

"Dad. For the millionth time, it's Dad, now…"

"Dad," Max gave a slight roll of the eyes. "You've given up thieving like Jigen's given up cigarettes. I know damn well that someone sneaks him a pack every year for his birthday…"

"Okay, okay, so I feel a little sorry for the guy! He's in his sixties now with a head full of gray hair and two kindergarteners! I think that's why I stuck to a woman around my age in the end… So I wouldn't have kids who are the same age as my grandkids, like I'm sure he would if his kids weren't all screwed up when it came to relationships…"

The door to the office flew open, causing a large stack of papers to go flying about the office liberally, and Ryo ran in, slamming the door behind her, "You guys have got to find Victor!"

"…._That's_ a new one," Lupin admitted. "Usually people are wanting him to disappear…. At times myself is included in that category…."

"Christ," Heiji looked about the ground and the papers and flung his arms up into the air. "Yay, three more hours of sorting! Hooray…."

"I'll help you," Dako said quietly, setting down the coffee on her father's desk and walking over to where Heiji had begun his work.

"Why in the hell do you want me to find him?" asked Max. "Why are you even here, Ryoko? …You could be arrested, and Leo wouldn't like that…"

"Screw Leo! My best friend, a man I care about and my boyfriend are all missing," said Ryo.

"I hate to break it to you, sweetheart, but you two were broken up a long time ago, and if you think different than you're even crazier than I thought you were…."

"I'm not talking about him—I'm talking about Victor! I'm dating… Victor…"

Lupin began to hack and choke on his coffee and turned a shade of red from oxygen deprivation before he was able to breath properly once again, "You're WHAT with WHO! When'd this happen, and why didn't your dad tell me this!"

"He has no clue," Ryo replied.

"What in the hell has been going ON with you guys?" Lupin asked as he looked about the room.

"I don't even know anymore," Max admitted. "Anyway, moving on… You said you had information about the connection to all of the disappearances…"

"Um, yeah…." Lupin shifted in his seat a bit and looked downward uncomfortably. "You see, well… Keep in mind this was like thirty-some years ago when it started, and, um, yeah… I haven't always made the best decisions… Yeah. Anyway, well… The kids, the missing people, they… I knew all of their mothers… Very well… Like I banged them at different occassions…"

"You mean to say those people are…" Max sat back in his chair, his mouth open a bit. Ryo, Heiji and Dako were silent as well. Only the oblivious Avery made gurgling noises in the background.

Dako finally broke the silence, "Holy sh—"

"Dakota Annette Zenigata-Lupin, don't you DARE!" Max said warningly.

"You're not my mom," said Dako, sticking out her tongue and going back to her work.

"Hey, kid," Heiji whispered to Dako as he bent down to help her pick up the papers. "I know you like to fight with your dad, but now's really not the time… He's really scared about your… Other… Dad…. They're both dad?"

"Leo's papa, Max is dad."

"Okay, well, he's worried about you papa then," Heiji said. "So let up on him a little, okay?"

"I, um… Yeah…" Dako gave a quiet nod.

"Thanks," Heiji leaned inward and kissed her on the cheek, and Dako stumbled back a little. Her grandfather tried not to laugh at this, and Max wasn't sure whether to beat Heiji or thank him. He was still getting over the fact that he had a lot more in-laws than he had assumed.

Wolf Island:

The guard passed down the long hall with the bunks once again, to make sure everyone was in their place… One, check, two, check, three, check, four… Sleeping very soundly. He bent downward over Jordan's bunk to inspect it, but was suddenly surprised by a loud noise. He jumped, drew a gun and turned about, and was relieved to find it was only Peter's snoring. The priest had done this on purpose; he had not snored a night in his life, but he had to keep the guard away from the dummies.

Meanwhile, in the middle of the woods, three figures marched along the path that Victor and Leo had found earlier that day.

"I still can't believe this," Leo mumbled, folding his arms and looking about.

"What in the hell are you so shy about?" Victor asked. "It's not like you're in the middle of a mall…."

"Well, I'm sorry I'm not as gung-ho about walking around in my shoes and boxers as some of us are," Leo hissed quietly. "Plus it gets kinda cold in the forest at night…"

"I've noticed," Victor said with a smirk, trying not to chuckle.

"Is that the place?" Jordan did his best to ignore the bickering of the Lupin on either side of him and pointed to a building in the distance.

"Yeah," Leo nodded and whispered. "Just watch out for traps…"

"Relax, we had some field tester from China search this place out," said Victor. "Damn I wish I had my cigarettes with me…"

"I'm sure there was enough room in your shorts, I don't see why you didn't," said Jordan as he continued to walk toward the building cautiously.

Victor narrowed his eyes, "Oh, we're making jokes like that now, are we?... Stupid hulking dumb blond…"

"Listen, Vicky, this is your last warning… You even talk again and I'll rip your throat out and let Leo hide the body."

Victor flushed and gritted his teeth together, "No one calls me Vicky except my mother!"

"I think you actually managed to push a button of his," Leo said, obviously impressed by this.

"It wasn't anything… He wants to play with fire, I'll give him fire… Now how'd those plans go?"

"Chris said that there was a weak panel at the top of the building when he and Fuji went through here earlier… Alsenia made a map," Leo looked upward at the building and passed Jordan the map that had been drawn out. "It's at the very top…"

"Any idea how we get up there?" Victor inquired. He looked over at Leo and Jordan and did a double take as he realized they were both looking to him. "What?"

"You're the tiniest… You weigh less than I do…" said Leo as he looked up at the rooftop.

"You just climb up the tree and drop this down to us," Jordan tossed him a rope constructed of bed sheets, and Victor gave an insulted look.

"Couldn't you have done this with someone else?" Victor asked.

"We're the only ones with thieving experience," Leo explained.

"What about the bitch?"

"We couldn't get enough fabric together to make melons big enough for a Fuji dummy. So shimmy up the tree, dummy," Jordan instructed.

"This is all one long insult for a toe-headed bastard child from Maui and a French queer," Victor grumbled as he began to climb up the tree, the rope over his shoulders. He rose cautiously on the branch, and inched toward it, until he was able to jump onto the roof. He then dropped the rope and waited.

"Do you think we can trust him?" Leo asked quietly.

"I don't think we've got a lot of options on who to trust right now," Jordan admitted, and was the first to climb up.

"Damn, how much does he weigh?" Victor muttered to himself, and stretched briefly after Jordan had climbed up onto the roof before helping Leo up.

"He said it was over here," said Leo quietly as he glanced down at the map. Victor and Jordan looked over his shoulders, and then went to moving the large piece of roofing. Both men looked downward at the blackness in front of them, and Jordan looked to Leo.

"I say we toss in your cousin…."

"That's be a good idea, actually," Victor said in a low voice.

"Huh?" Jordan and Leo shifted their glance to Victor.

"Believe me, if it's one thing I know, it's the dark," without another word, he hopped down into the blackness, and called from above, "Damn! You won't believe this!"

Lupin's home in Paris:

"So me and Yukiko and Toshiro check out that lead in Milan?" Jigen stood in front of Lupin's desk, beside him stood Goemon, and off in a distant corner was Zenigata, who was flipping over some case files and slipping quickly back into detective mode.

"Hm-hm," Lupin gave a nod, and looked to Goemon, "And you, Ryo, Ally and Odori check out those islands I mapped out for you… Ryo drives, of course… No offense, Goemon, but for some reason if it's not construction equipment you drive it like crap."

The samurai nodded silently, letting this statement slide off, "We will see to it."

"Hey, Lupin… How are you holding up?" Jigen asked, dropped his voice and leaning closer toward his friend.

"Well, I… I'm not at my best right now, guys," Lupin admitted. "Someone took my kids… I don't care if I never even met them, they're still mine… And if he even touched them… Well, if you think Goemon can go feudal on a guy's ass, you should see me when someone's put my family at risk. It ain't pretty."

"War usually isn't," said Jigen.

"Jigen, on your way out, could you turn on the TV…. There's something I've been meaning to watch," Lupin said as he leaned back in the leather chair behind his desk.

"Sure thing… What are you watching the game? I've got to TiVo it, myself… Well, actually Ming does… I've yet to figure out that crap…"

"No, it's a man I've taken quite an interest in… I don't know why, but he reminds me of someone I knew once. What pisses me off is I can't remember from where!" Lupin sighed. "I remember the time when I could never forget a face… Now sometimes I look in a mirror and I barely recognize me!"

"I do the same thing…" Goemon said sternly. "But usually it's because of the medication."

Lupin turned to Goemon and blinked a few times, "I don't know if you were crying out for someone to talk to or just being funny, Goemon. Channel 138, Jigen."

"Gotcha," Jigen nodded, switched on the television and seated himself on the edge of the chair Goemon was sitting upon. "Yeah, he does look familiar, doesn't he?"

"He's running for presidency of an international arms board," Lupin explained. "Mario Sarante."

"Sarante… Yeah, I think his dad might've done business with mine," said Jigen with a nod. "Shoot, I remember Sarante now! His dad was in the business of… Damn it, what was it?"

"I thought crosswords were supposed to keep your mind sharp, Jigen," said Lupin with a light chuckle. "This guy's broadcasting from his private island… He's rolling in it."

"Look at the shadows," Goemon nodded to the background of the Sarante's set where he addressed his audience. "Isn't that peculiar?"

"I bit," Lupin muttered. "Jigen, make sure this records, all right?"

"Already on it."

"You know me too well…"

Wolf Island:

"It's a set!" Leo whispered, stunned as he looked down at the same Italian who earlier in the day had threatened the life of his family. The Italian was different now, though. He was in a suit which Victor recognized as being Italian and quite expensive, and had cleaned up his entire appearance.

"We should've stolen guards uniforms, we could've gotten down there," Jordan muttered. "We could've let them known what was going on."

"By the time help came he would've killed us or transported us, probably," Victor murmured.

"Hey, you!" a guard shouted, and all three mean turned their attention to him.

"Crap!" Leo shouted, and began to run down the shaky catwalk with the others. They began to scale down a metal ladder, but the guard grabbed hold of Jordan's shoulder. The blonde managed to grip him about the wrist and sent him flying over his shoulder, down a good twenty five feet and onto the floor of the set. Sarante looked away from the camera, obviously nervous. He motioned for his cameraman to cut off, but by the time he had turned his attention back to the camera Victor was holding the knife Fuji had stolen to the man's neck.

"Get them!" Sarante shouted, and rose from his desk. Leo and Jordan went running past the camera, Leo running behind the desk while Jordan sent another guard flying off camera. The cameraman managed to get out of Victor's grasp and tried desperately to shut off the camera, but Victor pulled him in front of the camera by the hair. Another guard got to the camera equipment, and cut off at the exact moment before Victor killed the cameraman.

Paris:

Lupin said nothing. Jigen was speechless. Goemon was his usual silent self.

"Did your kid—Er, kids just go running past the camera in their boxers?" Jigen said finally, breaking the silence.

"…Yup…."

"And did your nephew just commit murder on an international broadcast?" Goemon continued.

"He sure as hell did," Lupin replied with a nod. He sat there thinking a moment, silent, before jumped from his chair and bounding for the door. "Come on, we've got to find where that signal was coming from! Goemon, where's Amaya?"

"Playing with the children," Goemon answered.

"Good. Get her. We need her here," Lupin said as he stuck his hands in his pockets and walked down a long stretch of hallway, "…This is just like the old days…"

Later that night, Paris:

"You can't go alone," Yukiko sighed as she seated herself on Ryo's bed. "Why in the hell are you going to go with them all the way to Australia, anyway?"

"It's something I have to do," Ryo said quietly as she folded another shirt and placed it in her suitcase. As she did this, the box that she keep in her pocket slipped out when she leaned forward to place the shirt in the suitcase, and Yukiko picked it up before she had opportunity to snatch it from her.

"Ryoko, who gave you this?" Yukiko asked as she opened the box. "It's nicer than my wedding ring!"

"…Victor," Ryo answered after a pause. She finished zipping up her suitcase and looked away from Yukiko, toward an open window in the room. "He…"

"Are you in love with him?" Yukiko wondered aloud.

"I think so. I'm not sure yet," Ryo admitted with a shrug. "He just… I can't explain it, but he's not like he is with the others when he's with me. He treats me… I don't know…"

"So you're traveling across the world to save someone who everyone thinks is a complete jerk?"

"Basically, yeah. You're going to call me a moron now, aren't you?"

"Nah, you're just in love, is all. That isn't anything I haven't done for Toshiro before," Yukiko tossed her the ring and stood. "Toshiro, Dori, Ally and I are coming."

"But, Yuki, you're pregnant…"

"So? The baby wants to see some action, too! I don't want it to feel left out… God, if you and him have a kid, you'll have your ex's nephew… Or cousin… Hell, I don't know."

"I don't even want to think about kids now," Ryo chuckled. "I don't think he does, either. Who knows where it will go? I feel like a moron for doing this, but I feel like I have to."

"Like I said, it's love. Come on now, let's get the hell out there," Yukiko patted her sister on the shoulder and met her brother, husband and sister-in-law in the hall way.

"You guys already packed?" Ryo asked, blinking with surprise.

"Yeah, it was all a matter of waiting to see how long it would take Yukiko to convince you to let us go with you," Ally answered. "Let's get going… The sooner this is over, the sooner I can get back to trying to fix my own love life."

"The island Mom traced the signal to has some rough waters," said Toshiro to Ryo. "I think you coming along was one of your better ideas…"

"And whatever I've got going on with Victor is one of my worse ones?" Ryo ventured to finish.

"No comment," Toshiro replied, turning the hall to the elevator doors. The metal doors opened, and what was left of the gang was on its way to Australia.


	28. Hungry like the Wolf

DISCLAIMER: You think I own Lupin? If you mean by owning Lupin I own a candy apple, then yes.

And welcome to the next chapter,

The next belated chapter… Yeah, I know I put out a Scrapbook story last week, but still. Oh, well, I guess I beat myself up too much over this sort of stuff. Speaking of beat up… Eh, well, just read the next chapter and find out. By the way, if you read the story last week… Yeah, the link didn't show up. Sorry. The link's on my profile. If you have no idea what in the hell I'm talking about, I've got a Photobucket site set up with my pictures for this series. So, if you're having a slow night, just check it out, and let me know what you think. Thanks! P.S.: Happy Halloween!

Fun fact of boredom: Not sure if I should be pointing this out, but… If you look in the beginning chapters of the Lupin IV series, Max was taller than Leo. Somehow over the years he's lost about four inches… He's now 5'5, whereas Leo stands 5'9…. Yeah, now I actually check for continuity.

Chapter twenty-eight: Hungry like the Wolf (Oh, you know that that chapter title was coming, ha ha)

Wolf Island:

"A little bit longer," Sarante muttered to his lackey as he paced back and forth. "….There, that ought to suffice…"

The guard let go of his grip on Leo's neck and allowed Lupin to come up for air. Leo fell back onto his elbows, gasping for air and a slight bluish color.

"Heh heh, maybe we knocked a few languages out of his skull," a guard chuckled and looked downward at the panting Lupin, who was still a bluish shade after a minute. Leo was in the middle of an asthma attack, and couldn't signal that he was having difficulty even sucking in the smallest breath. Not that anyone looking down at him would care. Sarante caught onto this, smirked and removed an inhaler from his pocket.

"It said you were asthmatic," Sarante murmured and tossed Leo the device, which Lupin rapidly picked up from the floor and began to use. He laid his head back on the ground and coughed a few times more as his breathing returned to normal. When it finally had, he was greeted with a bamboo pole smacked across his chest. Leo gripped his ribcage and sat up on the stone ground, and then looked out his barely opened eyes to Sarante.

"You're lucky they broke out the bamboo instead of the chains, like they did with that blonde bastard," Sarante murmured and removed a cigar from a pocket deep in his suit. "My workmen get very angry when things don't go there way, and when people have the ability to hold their breath under water for extended period of time… They also hate smartasses…." He turned to his guards and barked. "Get him the hell out of here. Take the others with him. Escort them back to their bunker… Personally…"

Leo was loaded into the back of a paddy wagon, and soon Jordan and Victor were loaded in. Leo noticed Jordan's back and gave a shudder at the marks on it, and then turned to Victor. "What, they didn't beat you, too? What'd you beg for your life?"

"They removed my wisdom teeth with pliers," Victor replied, and spat blood at Leo's feet. Both Jordan and Leo shuddered at this, and watched Victor bang his head against the wagon from the pain.

"They… They'll get you something for that at the bunker… We will," Jordan said reassuringly. "All I need is some aloe… So what'd they do to you?"

"Left me with some brain damage I've yet to discover, no doubt," Leo muttered and felt the van start up. He looked over to Victor and wiped some of the blood away from his cousin's mouth. "Well, you needed them out anyway, huh, Victor?"

Victor said nothing and looked downward at the floor of the van. "Ryo can't see me like this…" he said even though his pain was immense.

"Well, she won't," Leo reassured him, and the three sat in the back of the van in silence until they were unloaded in front of the bunker and thrown in.

"Oh my God!" Fuji gasped as they rose, and she and a few others immediately went to tending to the three injured men.

"Victor's in a lot of pain, is there anything we could give him?" Leo looked upward at Gabe with great concern as the Irishman finished bandaging him up.

"Eh, well, I got something…." Gabe admitted uneasily, and revealed something extra in a pack of cigarettes he carried, "That ought to put him on cloud nine…"

"Give it to him, and tell him it's cigarettes…" Leo murmured as he glanced at the joints briefly and back up at Gabe. Gabe nodded and walked over to Victor, who was holding onto his jaw. Gabe lit one of the 'cigarettes' for Victor and placed it in his mouth, and soon Lupin was out of much of the pain he had been in.

"What, we get beat and he gets pot?" Jordan moved a chair over to Leo's bed and seated himself next to his younger half brother. "That's kinda unfair, don't you think?"

"Pot makes me puke, anyway," Leo gave a shrug, and decided against doing that again as he felt pain surge through him. "They when they get mad, they really get mad, don't they?"

"At least we know that they can't kill us," Jordan sighed and rubbed his sore shoulder. "They can put us through hell, though."

"I'm hoping on some off chance Dad watched."

"Are you kidding? _Desperate Housewives _was on… He probably TiVo'd it and won't watch it until June," Jordan muttered darkly.

Victor was less than himself as he laid down upon the cot, and glared at Chris in the bunk next to him, "This is all your fault, you little bastard…. Do you have any idea what they did to us in there?... I know you saw it…"

"Don't pay attention to him none; he's high as a kite," Gabe said in a sigh to an apparently hurt Chris.

"Poor guy…" Chris muttered under his breath.

"I am a bit happy to see karma works in mysterious ways," Peter remarked to Chris. Chris shot his head around and snapped in a hiss.

"He might not be the greatest person, but there's a reason why he's like that. And it's probably a long and not-so-nice story. Show some compassion," Chris barked.

"Hey, bro, how are you?" Fuji passed by this bickering duo with the ease of the cat burglar that she was and seated herself on the edge of Leo's bed.

"I'm fine, Fuji, I just got a little beat up is all," Leo replied with a yawn. "I'm just kind of tired… And I feel weird without my glasses on."

"You look more like dad without them."

"Fuji, about seven other people look like Dad. Even Jordan does if you squint in the sun," Leo turned over on his side and closed his eyes, signaling for Fuji to leave him alone. "I'm going to try to sleep now, okay?"

"M-hm. Good night, Leo," Fuji kissed her brother on top of the forehead and rose, and climbed up to Jared's bunk.

"That's my dad, isn't it?" Jared muttered as he looked down at Leo's bunk, where there was only a purple-jacketed back viewable from his perch.

"You're smart," Fuji replied as she seated herself beside her nephew. "He may look like a dork, but he's awesome. He's got two kids…"

"I've got siblings?"

"Uh-huh. A little baby and a cute adopted sister," Fuji answered. "And, well, another dad."

"Wait, I've got three now?" Jared whipped his head about and blinked a few times.

"Well, that guy, my brother, met another guy…"

"…You mean he's…"

"Jared, there's nothing wrong with it," Fuji responded. "Let's face it… He lost it to a hooker twice his age, was engaged to someone with clinical depression, looked to comfort from a klepto, and was used nine kinds of ways by his boss. I can't blame him; I'd have made the switch long ago if I had his track record!"

"I… Guess…" Jared replied uneasily. "So should I go home with him? What about my other family?"

"I'm really not the one you should be talking to about this, Jare."

"What, I thought I had the right family, too."

"Because there was evidence… Now I'm thinking they rigged it, because ninjas are sneaky bastards like that. There's a reason I don't like working with them," she made sure to lower her voice with this comment, for there was a ninja present among them. "That means they wanted you for some reason."

"You mean… They wanted to use me?"

"Probably," Fuji admitted with a frown. "Sorry…"

"It… It's okay… Like father, like son, I guess," Jared replied.

About 200 miles off the island:

"We're sure this is it?" Lupin called over the rough waves, and then looked over at Odori and sighed. She was once again leaning over the side of the ship, sick from the waves and its rocking of the ship. "…Could someone lead her to a bathroom?"

"I'll take care of it," Ally sighed and lifted up his friend, and led her downstairs to the bathroom facilities below.

Jigen watched his son lead Odori below deck, then turned his attention to his two daughters. Two discussions to have and only so much time. His one was now beginning to show her pregnancy and was still fighting, and the other was dating a sadist. He had hoped that his later years would have been calm ones. He was wrong.

"Yukiko," Jigen nodded his daughter over and motioned for them to go inside, to where Zenigata was down below manning the two-way radio.

"What's up, Dad?" Yukiko perched herself up upon a table and stopped a lamp from rolling off of it as they hit a heavy wave.

"Your stomach, for one," Jigen murmured, and watched his daughter's eyes roll at this comment. "What in the hell are you doing carrying around a magnum and a baby?"

"Dad, it's not like my water's broken or anything, I'm fine!" Yukiko reassured him.

"You may be, but you can't be sure of the baby," Jigen responded. "Even your mom had some downtime, when she was pregnant with Ryo and then Ally. Fujiko took a break when she had kids, so'd Amaya. Hell, even Natasha quit cooking for a little while. Why can't you just relax?"

"Relaxing isn't in me," Yukiko replied with a shrug.

"Yeah, but someone who'd appreciate a break from this is," Jigen laid a hand on her stomach and looked at her sternly. "Let Toshiro be the protector for a while. You've got someone who'll take care of you, and you need to let him. If I know him, he's dying to."

Yukiko muttered and tapped her fingers on the table, "What do you want from me, then?"

"A promise that you'll lay off until that baby's born. Take maternity leave," Jigen ordered.

"You know, Ryo's dating a crazy, you could bug her…"

"She's next on my list. I'm going in order of danger, though, and you're at the top," Jigen responded. "Your mother's been at that place you and Toshiro bought for months now with that boy-toy she's got."

"What, are you jealous?" Yukiko asked with a laugh, nudging her father. "You still have a small flame for someone?"

"There'll always be something between me and her, I can't not love her. I love Ming, though, and that's who I'm staying with. Besides, Sakura and I are too different now…. I'm sure you can relate."

"She was your Jordan, neh?" Yukiko smirked, and Jigen simply nodded. "Well, hopefully he'll meet someone sooner than Mom did… He deserves someone nice."

"That boy deserves a friggin' bullet as much as he stressed me out," Jigen remarked under his breath, and Yukiko gave him another gentle push. "Come on, the worst Toshiro did was dress in drag and maybe do some drugs—"

"How'd you know about that?" Yukiko asked in a mutter.

"Please, Ming tells me all the time how she redoes his hair red because it's growing in friggin' gray now. That's what happened to Steve Martin from all the coke he did."

"You're crazy, it's from the hair dye. The red's reacted with his hair so now it grows in that color and that dye in particular is the only kind that won't make it look like crap. Nothing else just seems to work on him," Yukiko sighed.

"You say potato I say main-liner," Jigen was caught off guard as his daughter reached over and embraced him, and gave a sigh and resigned himself to placing his arms about her as well. "At least he gave up that crap… I'm proud of you, I wanted you to know that before you got too busy popping out those grandkids."

"_Dad_!"

"Heh, you really can't take a joke, you know that? I'm gonna go ride your sister, now… She's got a lot of explaining to do," Jigen broke from their grip and then walked up the stairs to the deck of the ship.

Ryo was starboard on the boat, and turned about in surprise when she felt her father's hand on her shoulder. "Hey, Daddy…"

"I just got done with your sister, so now it's your turn," Jigen said warningly.

"No time, we're here," Leo announced. He looked over at a ship in the distance and smiled. "And with company…. Woah, down, tiger," he lowered the raised gun of Ally, who was standing beside him. "This is a friendly ship…. I'm gonna say hello!" he laughed and hopped down below with the spryness of one of his grandchildren, and sauntered over to where Zenigata sat. "How's life treating you, soldier?"

"I'm guessing you want to talk to him, too," Zenigata muttered, unamused by Lupin's joviality.

"You betcha," Lupin took the headset and leaned back in a chair in front of the machinery. "How's my favorite in-law?"

"Worried about his favorite Lupin," Max answered tiredly.

"But I'm just fine, Max!" Lupin chuckled.

"Hi, Grandpa!" Dako called.

"You, you've got the kids with you?" Lupin choked.

"What was I supposed to do with them?" Max sighed.

"Eh, I'll Pops watch over them when we land. We've got some pretty sweet coordinates to dock on, you want?" Lupin inquired with a chuckle.

"Heh, are you kidding—Gimme," was Max's brisk answer.

The two boats docked inside a cave, and Dako was quick to jump out and tackle Lupin and Zenigata, who were standing side by side.

"We missed you too, Dako… Now can you let go of our legs? We need them," Lupin said as he patted the young girl on the head and Max and Heiji jumped onto the Lupin gang ship, Max with Avery in his arms. Heiji gave a small depressed sigh as he saw there was no Fuji to tackle him and greet him, as there had been so many times. Instead he was greeted by the ever-stoic face of his father, his siblings and his grandfather. Smiling wasn't a normal function in the Ishikawa or Zenigata clans, he concluded.

"Pops, why don't you take the kids while the rest of us think up a gameplan?" Lupin asked with his usual cheery grin.

Yukiko gave a sigh as she looked in her father's direction; she knew what he wanted her to do, and perhaps it was the right thing, "Nah, I'll look after them…"

Lupin blinked a few times, as if not hearing this correctly, "You sure Yuki?"

"Er, yeah," Yukiko took Avery and held him as if someone had just passed her a bomb, and watched as the others filed out onto the land.

"I'm proud of you. You're less stubborn than me, afterall," Jigen whispered to his daughter as he passed and then stepped off with the help of Goemon.

"Now let's go get my kids, it's past their bedtime!" Lupin said with a smile.

"How is that possible—You probably have on in every time zone," Jigen responded dryly.

"You know, Jigen, I didn't bag on you this much when we found out you had a kid."

"Yeah, because it was only one… You're just a slut," Jigen replied, and Lupin gave a small roll of the eyes.

At the Bunker:

"How'd you even get this, Fuji?" Leo looked downward at the flyer, and back up at his sister.

"Eh, I turned on my feminine charms…" Fuji replied uneasily.

"Oh, God, you didn't—"

"Hell no! I've been a one-man girl for months!"

"What, did they put you on a patch?" Victor murmured from his bed.

"Please let me kill him, Leo, just a little bit," Fuji said through gritted teeth. Leo paid no attention to this, however, and instead rose and put on his purple jacket, and adjusted his tie.

"I think I have a plan," Leo said, and had a look upon his face which Fuji had thought all but vanished. It was a classic Lupin look, one that said he would indeed end up getting his way.

By the evening, the patriarch of the Lupin the Third gang, a majority of his old team and part of his daughter's team were halfway about the island, and the Lupin clan in their bunker was already working on their plan.

"Noooo way," Jordan said, shaking his head. "It's bad enough most of the world now knows I wear Fruit of the Loom, this is pushing it. You're as crazy as he is."

"Yeah, I get that a lot," Leo answered with a mousy chuckle and a small grin. "Gabe and Peter are already going to get our disguises."

At the mention of their names, the Irishman and the priest burst in, their arms full with large boxes with bright colored fabrics sticking out.

"Maybe your ex'll take you back if she sees you," said Victor to Jordan as he opened one box. "She seems to go for guys in makeup, and…" he pulled out a koto, and gave Leo a look of curiosity.

Leo smiled and threw a kimono over his shoulders, "Men in kimonos like that tend to like traditional forms of entertainment."

"Ohhh boy," Jordan murmured and shook his head.

"I'm glad we're just getting' to kick a little ass instead of havin' to do something like that, ain't you, Pete?" Gabe asked laughingly.

"He is a nice man for a homosexual," Peter said with a nod as he looked over at Leo.

"What, did you think they bit or something?" Gabe asked with a laugh.

"Eh, I was not very sure," Peter replied with a shrug.

"Here, Jared," Leo tossed Jared a kimono and smiled. "We need a kid, anyway."

"You beat up a child?" the shocked Alsenia gasped as she looked over at Gabe and Peter.

"Nah, he was a mid—Er, 'little person'," Gabe replied. "…We think."

"Little people do not wear Pokémon clothing," replied Peter, who was then nudged roughly in the ribs by Gabe.

Jared took the outfit, then looked at Leo as he placed his own kimono over his shoulders. "Your kimono looks like mine," Jared murmured.

"That isn't the only thing," Jordan looked over at Leo slyly, and the inspector blinked a few times, as if not quite catching on to this. Jordan shook his head and sighed, "Hopeless…"

The Middle Eastern woman spoke up at this point, and said in a low voice, "How will they not miss you?"

"Because," Fuji looked over at her with a wide smile, "Alsenia's going to be leading you off to the edge of the island while we put on a pretty l'il performance. Chris and I went out again and we found where all of those fat cats dock their ships. We'll take care of the said fat cats."

"Lupin, here," Fuji turned her head at the call of her name, and grabbed onto the thick kimono she was handed.

After finishing their disguises, and two Lupin siblings took turns knocking out the guards in front of their bunker, Alsenia and a Chinese Lupin put on the uniforms of the guards, smiled at one another, and nodded. They then went to leading out the 'prisoners' to a new destination.

Leo, Fuji, Jordan, Victor, Chris, Jared as well as an un-costumed Peter and Gabe then walked out a few minutes later, Gabe and Peter also dressed in uniform.

"I hate family reunions, I ever mention that?" Jordan murmured to Chris.

"At least you grew up with one," Chris muttered.

"Yeah, for a little while," Jordan answered, looking over to his right as he heard a twig snap in the said direction. After seeing nothing, he continued onward in procession with the others. "My mom died when I was little… A guy whom I didn't know to be my uncle killed her."

Victor gulped upon hearing this and grew outwardly nervous. It just never ended… He was still paying for his father's murderous streak. He had spent so much time in his life trying to defend himself from the attacks of angry family and friends of Remy Lupin's victims he sometimes wondered if he had turned out like him as a result.

"Wait, Leo, how in the hell are we going to hide these collars?" Fuji stopped dead and gripped onto the steel bar about her neck.

"Er, Jordan and I talked about that already…" Leo eyed the taller sibling uneasily, and halted in front of a boulder. "This'll be fine, Jordan."

"Okay, who's first?" Jordan drew a gun, and Victor immediately took a few steps back, with an expression likened to when he saw a snake about to bite him.

"Eh, I might as well… This is going to leave a ringing in my ears, though," Leo sighed and bent down, and not even Victor made a joke as he watched in silence. Jordan loaded the gun, a gift from Peter to him, and shot with the silencer on, much to Leo's relief. There was a slight burn mark on Leo's neck from where Jordan had shot, missing anything vital by inches. "I'm glad you and Yukiko thought of the shooting range as a romantic spot… Who's next?"

"Eh, what the hell? I follow you in everything—Being born, thieving—Why not this, too?" Fuji bent down, laying her head upon the boulder, and closed her eyes tightly. Jordan also bent down to Fuji's level, kneeling upon one knee, and he shot at where the ring had raised from Fuji's resting her neck upon a flat surface. She took rubbed her neck after she finished, and then Peter and Gabe followed, and then Chris, who was slightly nervous at their but kept it to himself nonetheless.

"Victor?" Jordan smirked, and his cousin paled at the call of his name.

"I… No, I…" Victor sputtered quietly and shook his head.

"Just trust me," Jordan sighed and loaded a few more bullets into the gun. A gun with a whole box of bullets… Fuji turned to Peter and silently wondered how indeed he had pulled this away from an armed guard. One more of Father Walker's secrets, she concluded.

"You make the shot," Victor said to Leo, who was puzzled at this request.

"Why him?" Jordan wondered aloud.

Leo gave a small sigh after a pause, and took the gun from Jordan. "I think I get why… Assume the position, Victor."

"I'll bet you say that to all of the en you meet," Victor murmured with a smirk, and Leo also gave a small smile at this comment. Jared had no idea what they were talking about, but also covered his ears for this shot, as he had done with the others.

"Okay, someone explain this to me?" Fuji asked as she watched an unharmed Victor rise.

"He won't kill me because I make Ryo happy," Victor responded.

"And you better keep it up, or the next bullet I fire will be between your eyes," Leo responded with a frown. "Okay, Jordan, you want to take care of Jared?"

"No, I want you to do it," said Jared quietly to Leo.

"You'd rather have your dad do it, huh?" Leo responded with the same quietness, and then looked over at Fuji's shocked expression. "I kinda figured it out when I was watching him… He fidgets like I do."

"Why do I have the feeling that you've got it on more than I have?" Jordan asked with a sigh. Leo shot at Jared's marker, and then freed Jordan, and they continued on their way. Peter and Gabe knocked out the guards in the front of the building's back entrance, and they entered through the stage doors.

"Now what?" Fuji whispered.

"I'll get the rigging," Chris announced as he looked upward at the catwalk above them. "Peter and Gabriel will run to the back on the building dressed as guards, the rest of you already know what to do—Right, Fuji?"

"Kid, do you want a job with me after this is all over?" Fuji asked with a smile.

"Nah-ah, I call dibs," Victor responded quickly and picked up the koto, and began to adjust the strings.

"What are you doing?" Leo asked, tilting his head to a side.

"You'll see," Victor muttered, and then looked to the others. "I take it we're ready?"

"There better not be cameras," said Jordan as he walked out to the tea room setting on the other side of the stage. There were low tables all throughout the room, with and the Japanese men only took up a few of them. Sarante was in the center of the room of course, but in the tables surrounding there were other potential buyers. Victor seated himself on the low stage and watched as the group spread out, serving tea to the various patrons and in Fuji's case, flirting horribly.

Leo had bent over to serve a tray of tea when he felt a smack upon his backside. He swiveled about, and caught sight of a middle-aged woman winking at him. He tried to hide a shudder, and resumed his work. He them looked up once again as he heard Jared.

"Hey, let go of me you creep!" Jared shouted to a drunken patron, who had taken him by the arm.

Before Leo knew what he was doing, he had already splashed an entire kettle of hot tea onto the man's face, and Jared ran to him.

The drunk patron rose and hobbled over to Leo and Jared, his sword drawn, "You wanna screw with me, eh?... Hey, you look familiar…"

"Tea, anyone?" Fuji quickly butted in and smile innocently, and only briefly glanced at Chris, who was working the lights by this time.

"Sir, is there anything you'd like me to play?" Victor approached Sarante, his instrument in hand. Other than Fuji, Jordan was closest, and noted how lose the strings on the mandolin-like instrument were.

"I'm not picky," Sarante murmured, then smiled. "Nothing too long… I'm sure your teeth are still aching."

Victor smiled, let lose the strings of the koto and in a swift move had them wrapped about Sarante's neck, "Any of you move and I turn your boss into sashimi!" he shouted to the armed guards about the room. Each group member took hold of a weapon, and Chris smiled and did his part. A few sandbags with other ingredients he had mixed in from natural plants dropped, and filled the air with a haze. The Lupin gang knew to cover their faces, and Leo lifted up Jordan and held the young boy's face to his chest to shield him from the thick powder.

Victor had to let go of the strings with one of his hands to shield his mouth and nose, and Sarante took this opening to kick Victor's other arm and Lupin briefly let go of the koto, but it was enough time for Sarante to take the upper hand and escape.

"Damn it, someone stop him!" Victor shouted.

"I've got him!" Jordan called and grabbed for Sarante, but only ended up with a stab wound in the arm.

The front door to the establishment was blown open as Sarante made his way to the front, and the Lupin the Third gang was more than shocked by the scene inside. The Italian still managed to escape, however.

"Here," Leo ran past Jigen quickly and deposited Jordan in his arms. "I'm going after him."

"I'm coming, too," Lupin murmured and ran after Leo through the woods.

"Dad, I can take him!" Leo reassured his father.

"We can both do it," Lupin smiled and jumped a log, and before long they found Sarante. He had fallen over a large branch, and now struggled to rise. When he finally did, he pulled a gun and aimed it at father and son.

"Please, a gun? My wife does this to me weekly!" Lupin laughed and shoved his hands in his pockets. "And I'm sure Ari and Max have a similar relationship, if he's anything like his father!"

"I have reason to not kill Arsène the Fourth, but your model is outdated, Lupin," Sarante snarled.

Lupin looked upward and saw perched in a tree Ally beside his father. On an opposing tree sat perched Goemon beside his daughter. He turned his attention back to Sarante and smiled, "Hey, I'm an oldie but goodie. Right, Leo?"

"Mm-hm," Leo nodded, and watched as Sarante went to fire. He saw this and quickly grabbed his father's gun from its holster and shot Sarante in the knee, making him collapse to the ground. A sword was thrown, knocking the gun out of Sarante's hands, and then a shot from a magnum was fired, killing him.

"Don't think that just because we're old we don't know anything," Lupin murmured as he lit a cigarette and discarded the match near Sarante.

"Dad… That was kind of cool…" Leo admitted with a laugh as they began to head back to the main building, where the Lupin the Fourth team had disabled and captured near all of Sarante's guards.

"Okay, let's get them in a line," Max shouted to the gang.

"What, I'm on your payroll now?" Toshiro muttered, but drug one of the bound guards and lined him up against the wall with the others. The prospective buyers had also been caught and placed in their own section of the large room.

"Woah, Zenigata, the kid is a good cop," an astounded Lupin stood himself next to his old enemy and both watched Max at work.

Max turned his head and smiled at Leo, "Inspector Lupin, do you want to read them their rights?"

"Certainly!" Leo responded. "I'll even translate!"

"What's even scarier is your kid is a good cop, too," Zenigata added as they both watched the duo at work. Max leaned over and kissed Leo on the cheek, and smiled, much to their parents chagrin.

"I know exactly what that expression means," said Lupin as he watched Leo smile as he continued to bust the bad guys. "That's the same look I used to get when I still got lucky on a regular basis."

"Yeah, well if you hadn't gotten lucky so much this might not have even happened," Zenigata snapped in response.

"Eh heh heh," Lupin smiled and scratched the back of his head. "Oh, come on, like you've never at least had a girl think that you got her pregnant."

"Why do you think I married my first wife?" Zenigata snapped and stormed off, leaving a bewildered Lupin in the middle of the room.

Jordan snuck up from behind and placed Lupin in a firm grip, "How are you, old man?"

"Gyak! Too tight, too tight!" Lupin shouted, pounding upon Jordan's arm. He let go of Lupin and smiled, and Lupin paled as his eyes fell upon Jordan's wound. "You need to get that checked out, Jordan… That looks pretty deep! Jeeze, you're just like your mom! She used to come back with all of these friggin' wounds, I'm surprised she lasted as long as she did."

"I'll take care of you," Odori stepped over to Jordan, and Lupin raised an eyebrow as he watched the samurai's body language, as did Goemon. Jordan merely looked back at his father and shrugged.

"I wish for you to come with me to Japan," said Odori as she kneeled in front of Jordan on the ground and retrieved a roll of gauze from her gi. "If you aren't doing anything of importance, that is."

"What about your boss?" Jordan inquired, looking over to Max and Leo briefly. One guard had tried to make a run for Leo, and Max, in response, kicked the guard back roughly against the wall.

"This is a personal mission," Odori answered. "I'm retrieving my daughter. She misses me. She isn't eating like she used to, and she never sleeps, so I am to go to Japan and get her back."

Jigen watched Odori and Jordan with amusement, and then looked to Lupin, "Your brood's going to an island off of New Zealand. You gonna meet them there?"

"Nah," Lupin shook his head. "Call me a chicken, but I can't face them all at once. Leo already told me that Fuji got information from all of them, so I think I'll get in touch with them one at a time."

"Which one you gonna visit first?"

"My Nazi-killing priest son who lives in Germany."

"Good to know that Ari isn't your only gay son."

"Yeah, I found some reassurance in that, too," Lupin muttered. "Fuji's inviting them to a party though, in Mexico City. That girl… Is doesn't matter how serious the situation is, she's always concentrated on the next party."

"She grew up to be just like her mother, in that way."

"Damn it I know!" Lupin sighed, and chuckled. "Speaking of mothers, looks like Ryo's turned into her mom. She's going for a bad boy, it seems…"

"Huh?" Jigen turned his head and saw Ryo tending to Victor. Jigen gave an outward shudder, and went to go run over to Victor and hopefully crack his skull open, but Lupin stopped his faithful gunman.

"Listen, maybe Victor isn't the ass he is to everyone else when it comes to Ryo," Lupin suggested. "Plus this is kinda cute to watch… Now if you excuse me, I think I can handle seeing two of my kids…" He stepped over to Peter and Gabe, and Jigen, from the little he could see, could see Gabe was happy to see him while Peter was understandably a little nervous.

"Good to have things back to normal," Jigen said to Goemon as the samurai passed him.

A few weeks later, San Francisco:

"Naruto, huh?" Dako adjusted her tiara in the mirror and looked back at her new brother Jared, who was putting on his headband.

"Yup! Max helped me make the costume," Jared answered.

"Yeah, he helped with mine, too… How he knew how to make a Sailor Moon costume without looking at a pattern is kinda scary, though…." Dako admitted as she looked over he costume once more.

"You guys ready?" Leo called from downstairs.

"Almost!" Dako shouted, and turned away from the mirror. "So have the Fumas done anything else, Jared?"

"They're still sending threats, but Leo and Max aren't scared," Jared responded, and stepped out of the room with Dako behind him. He looked over at her and frowned; why in the hell had God cursed him with a good-looking stepsister?

Leo held Avery in his hands arms, and Max had gone to fetch the camera. Avery was dressed in a Doraemon costume that made him look like a small blue ball of felt. The children's fathers had also gotten into costume, Max borrowing his father's trench coat and fedora and going as Inspector Zenigata and Leo taking the role of Lupin the Third and donning a red jacket for the first time in years.

"Let's go, I want to get enough candy to get sick on," Dako announced as she ran down the stairs with Jared close behind her. She ran straight in to Max, who was fidgeting with the camera, and they collided and both fell atop one another.

"My spine," Max groaned.

"Come on, Max… Dako, are you okay?" Leo chuckled lightly as he bent downward to help both stand.

"I'm pretty sure she broke something," Max murmured as he rose and shook his head. He adjusted his fedora and ruffled Avery's hair. "Let's get going so we can beat he other little monsters…."

"Sounds good," Leo nodded, "Now let's get a nice—" but the children were already gone. Leo sighed and looked downward at the drooling Avery, "At least you can't run."

"Eh, don't worry, we'll get a picture with them after they're passed out from gorging," Max muttered as he looked down at the camera, accidentally hit the flash and snapped a photo directly in his face. Max was briefly blinded and blinked and cursed until his vision returned to normal.

"Dork," Leo chortled. "Let's get going before we have to use the police cruiser to track them down…"

"Sounds good," Max murmured and rubbed his aching eyes.

"Hey, Max, are you sure you're okay with this?" Leo asked quietly.

"Adopting Jared? Sure," Max shrugged. "That kid's told me about Fuma… Sounds like the military!"

"And what about, well…"

"Getting a house?" Max paused. "Eh, I'll live with it. Besides our place is too damn small for these kids now…"

Leo gave a wry chuckle, "I just feel like I was this total manwhore and now you're paying for it, too."

Max smiled and patted Leo on the hand, "Hey, don't beat yourself up over it. Besides, I waited long enough and fought hard enough to get you, I'm not going to let something like this get me down!"

"Thanks," Leo sighed and leaned in against Max as they walked out of the house and down the steps of the porch onto the street. "I think even Ryo would've been running about now. I'm glad I found a lunatic to stay with."

"Um, thank you? And for the record, Ryoko's crazier than I am," Max replied and smiled as Avery grabbed on to Leo's tie and began to bite at it. "Are you going to go to their wedding?"

"Not sure… I'm not exactly invited… Plus she hasn't even said yes, yet!"

"She'll say yes…"

"You don't know that, she might and—Dako, no! Put the pumpkin DOWN!"

"Oi… I'll take this…" Max broke in to a run to catch up to his son and daughter, while Leo continued to look after Avery.

"Just for the record, he's just as crazy as anyone else I've dated, he's just a lot nicer," Leo said to Avery with a smile.

Japan:

Jordan glanced over once again at Odori, who sat with Namiko in her lap. The samurai was making faces at her daughter and laughing at Namiko's amused expression, and reached down to kiss her on the forehead.

"You're like a whole different person around her," Jordan said to Odori when they came to a traffic light.

"It's hard for me to find people I enjoy the company of," Odori admitted, and brushed some of Namiko's black hair with her fingers. "It's even harder for me to find people I love."

"Yeah, Fuji mentioned that you don't really express your emotions much, and that you're a lot like Goemon," the light was green after a few more seconds, and Jordan made a right-hand turn back toward the airport.

"You and Fujiko spoke of me?" Odori asked with a frown of distrust.

"Nothing bad," Jordan did not look over to see Odori's narrowed almond eyes, but kept his attention merely upon the road. "Just random conversation."

"Hrm, I see," Odori looked out the window, and Jordan kept his focus upon the city in front of him.

He glanced down at Namiko and smiled, and she looked back upward at him and gurgled, "Dada."

Odori shot her head in the other direction and looked at the little girl, as did a stunned Jordan, and then the samurai and the Lupin heir looked to one another.

"Dada," Namiko giggled once again.


	29. We can Work it Out

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Lupin. This space for sale.

Um, have I told you all lately how much I love you?

Heh, ten points on my nerd scale for the Rod Stewart reference. Once again, another chapter I would've liked to see come out earlier, but alas, 'tis the time for cheery holiday candy, which means stuffing my gullet… It's all a little distracting to the writing process. So, what's one to do but eliminate the problem, Hershey kiss by delicious Hershey kiss…. Special thanks to DJ Clawson for once again sparking my creativity and making my week a heck of a lot better. This chapter goes out to you.

Fun Fact of Boredom: There was a point in the creative process in making the Lupin IV gang where I considered making Max's character a girl. What stopped that? The gang would've been overrun with estrogen, with five girl characters and four male character. Plus at the time giving Zenigata another girl seemed too cruel for the old man, although now looking at what I'm putting out Max is even worse than I girl could ever be.

Chapter Twenty Nine: We Can Work it Out

Tokyo, Japan:

"Not 'Dada'… Jordan," Jordan spoke to Namiko with his neck craned down to meet the little girl, who was gripping onto her soft doll tightly.

Namiko laughed and pointed a finger to Jordan, "Dada!"

"Oi…" Jordan moaned and sat back in his seat, and looked over to Odori, but found her not in the main room of the hotel. He rose, lifting the little girl, and walked toward the bedroom.

Odori was in front of the mirror tying her hair up into is usual tight ponytail, and jumped in surprise when she registered Jordan's reflection. She turned about and removed the ribbon she had held in her mouth, and cleared her throat, "I'll be finished momentarily… Is she still…?"

"Yup, and I'm still Dada," Jordan muttered and seated himself upon the edge of the bed, letting Namiko balance on one of his knees and continue to play with her doll. "Eh, it could be worse… At least she doesn't think I'm mommy."

Odori gave a small smile and continued to fiddle with her hair, and gave a confused look when Jordan rose from the bed, allowing Namiko to continue to play with her doll on top of the comfortor, and stood behind her, "Eh, here, I'll help… I'm not girlie or anything, I've just dated a lot of girls with long hair."

"…Like Yukiko."

"Yeah, like her," Jordan answered in a lower voice.

"You still love her like I still love Namiko's father, don't you?"

"Heh, guilty. How can you still love that guy? He practically blackmailed you into giving you the baby, and then called you in the middle of the night wanting you to take it back because she wasn't eating!"

"It wasn't Musashi; it was clan politics," Odori responded. "And I am grateful that he allowed me to take back my daughter… I would have given twenty years of my life and the knowledge that I would never be able to lift a sword again to have her with me."

"Fuji's right, you are a good mom," Jordan said with a laugh.

"How you're related to the whore is beyond me," Odori murmured and turned around as Jordan finished.

"Eh, I wonder sometimes, too… Her and Ari and me… We aren't exactly alike… But, hell, we've also got a priest for a brother, so I guess that anything's possible…. What are you doing your hair so late at night for, anyway? Do you have a date or something?"

"Um… no…" Odori flushed and looked downward at the floor. "I found out that I have a sister in town… One of my biological ones. I haven't visited her in over, a year, so…"

"Do you need a babysitter?"

"Well, I'd much rather prefer company. I don't really feel comfortable in the circles she does," Odori responded, and stepped over to the door. "If you excuse me, I have to change for this evening."

"Yeah, we'll just go play dolls," Jordan lifted up Namiko and tossed her up in the air then caught her, and the little girl laughed in response to this.

The samurai gave a small smile, then turned her attention to her suitcase, and sighed at the outfit she had bought earlier in the morning, "Why do I do these things? Western fashion… Ugh, tasteless… You better appreciate this, Young Lee."

Jordan was still playing when Odori stepped out of her room, in makeup, earrings, and even a skirt. The skirt short and black with a butterfly pattern, and the blouse was white and continued with the butterfly pattern. The blouse like a kimono top with long sleeves and a black obi, and Odori sighed and looked down at the black sandals she had borrowed from Fuji, "…These are big on me…"

"You look fine," Jordan replied, and stood with Namiko in his arms. Odori took the child from him and dressed her for the night, and Jordan gave a laugh as he looked at the two, "You're making me feel like I should get dressed up for this…."

"If you wish," Namiko wriggled in Odori's arms, uncomfortable and unaccustomed to the dress her mother had put her in. Odori felt similar about her outfit, but did not want to disgrace her sister by appearing in her traditional gi. When she and Young Lee had met for the first time, Odori knew that she had found her strange. She did not want a similar occurrence.

"Ready when you are," Jordan buttoned the top button of his shirt and stepped out of his room. Odori averted her eyes, nodded, and they exited the hotel room with Namiko.

Jordan caught the cab for them, and Odori gave directions, letting the clinging Namiko remain on her lap while they made the commute to Shinjuku.

"Ummm…. This is a club," Jordan blinked a few times and he looked upward at the neon sign which the cab had stopped in front of.

"I know," Odori opened her door and stepped out, and looked upward at the sign briefly, then sighed and entered. Jordan followed close behind, looking about the club patrons suspiciously (a habit from his on-the-run lifestyle) and then walked behind Odori to an upstairs room, which was circular with a red couch surrounding it and a window overlooking the partygoers below.

"She ought to be in in a matter of minutes. She's on her last song, I've been told," Odori announced as she looked over her shoulder at the window, and then at the petite Asian girl on stage. She gave a small smile and then turned her attention back to her daughter.

"So… Your sister's a musician… I guess I'm not the only one with unlikely siblings."

Odori gave a nod, and sighed as she looked over the brightly lit stage, "….What she sees in this lifestyle I fail to recognize."

"She probably feels the same way about you and yours," Jordan replied, looking over Odori's shoulder at the club. The tiny woman done up in classic Shinjuku punk attire was soon off the stage and running up the stairs to the private room. She opened the door and embraced Odori tightly.

"Mi Noh!" Young Lee squealed and embraced Odori tightly about the neck. She gasped and looked down at the little girl. "And this must be Namiko!... And who's the hottie?"

"….He's my friend," a flushed Odori muttered, glancing at Jordan briefly and clearing her throat. "How are the business been, Young?"

"It's awesome!" Young Lee answered, glancing out at the crowd. "I'm going on tour with the Pillows and Boa next fall!"

"That's wonderful," Odori smiled, although she had no idea who in the hell either band was, if they were indeed bands. "Do you write to Moon Bin or Yong Si still?"

"Mother and Father? You bet!" Young Lee answered with a wide goofy smile which looked strange, considering how similar she looked to Odori. The same long hair, the same narrow eyes, and the same turned up nose. It was almost eerie; they looked almost like identical twins. Jordan glanced to one woman, and then the other, and wondered if they indeed were twins.

"I still wire them money, and they say you do the same, Mi Noh," Young Lee seated herself upon on of the large cushy couches and continued in her happy line of conversation as Namiko waddled over to her. Namiko looked over at Jordan, and chortled.

"Dada…"

"…I'm going to go get water…." Jordan cleared his throat, placed his hands in his pockets and stepped out, leaving a confused Young Lee and a perturbed Odori.

"So, is he like your boyfriend? He seems nicer than the last guy…. Cuter, too. I just didn't know you had a thing for white guys!"

"I don't…. Well, I… That is to say that his mother was white, and his father is Lupin the Third…"

"Aw, Mi, you're blushing!" Young Lee laughed and lifted Namiko up onto her lap. "I think you know that I didn't call you all of the way over here to make fun of you having a crush."

"It's not a crush…" Odori repeated. "He is just a friend of mine whom I harbor respect for…" she seated herself beside Young Lee and looked to her sister. "So what is the real issue here, Young Lee?"

"You're familiar with the Beatles, right?"

"I live the way of the Bushido, not beneath a rock. Of course I am."

"Well, someone's making false tapes of their recordings, and selling them underground."

"There are surviving members, why don't they come forward?"

"They don't know about it, yet. The tapes sound authentic, but they aren't Mi Noh," said Young Lee with a shake of the head. "Someone's gonna make big bucks off of an auction coming up."

"Fake recordings? That's an awful lot of trouble to go through…"

"Lennon's old car just went for over a hundred grand… I think that a little trouble would be worth it for a payoff like that."

"We'll get on it," Odori rose from her seat. "Any idea where we could start looking?"

"I heard that they're working out of Mexico City."

"Mexico…" Odori muttered. "I wonder if she planned that…"

"Hm?"

"Nothing," Odori turned to the door as it opened and Jordan walked in with a glass of water. "We must be going. It was wonderful seeing you again, Young Lee."

"You, too, Mi Noh," Young Lee smiled and passed Namiko off to her mother. "Don't stay a stranger, and congrats with the blond!"

"….What'd you two talk about?" Jordan wondered aloud. He quickly sipped his drink and tossed the emptied cup into the crowd below and quickened his pace to keep up with Odori. "And why'd she give me these weird looks?"

"She's man crazy, like Lupin…"

"Which one?" Jordan chuckled, but his good-natured smile faded as he realized this joke had fallen flat upon its face. He cleared his throat and continued as they stepped out of the club and to a taxi. "Charley's, please," Jordan ordered the taxi cab driver, passing him several yen coins.

"Charley's?" Odori looked over at Jordan with confusion. "Why aren't we going back to the hotel?"

"Eh, you're dressed too nice to be going straight back to the hotel, so I thought I'd treat you to dinner."

"You don't have to do this," said Odori with a lowered head.

"Hey, no problem. You're a nice girl, so—"

"I'm a woman, not a girl. Girls don't have infants."

"First of, Nami's a toddler, now, and second, I'm sorry if you took that as some sort of short joke, I didn't mean for it to come out like that…. It just looks like it's been a while since you've had a good time."

"….."

"Am I right?"

"I suppose," Odori sighed and looked out the window at the passing by scenery, "Thank you, for this…"

"Like I said, no problem. Now I know you're Goemon's daughter, but try to smile at least once tonight… Who knows, maybe you'll even laugh!" Jordan said with a chuckle.

Paris:

"Here, get me the screwdriver…" Max muttered at he walked into the kitchen of his and Leo's next home. It was a two-story residence with boxes still stacked high throughout the household. Leo was in the middle of stacking away several plates when Max approached him.

"Why, are you actually doing home repair?" Leo snorted and pushed up his glasses.

"No, you know those dolls with the joints? I was trying to have 'the talk' with Dako and now Ken's stuck straddling Billy," Max murmured as he held up the obscenely-positioned dolls. Leo's eyes widened and he blinked a few times, then slowly opened the tool drawer and passed Max the screwdriver.

Leo looked over Max's shoulder as he went to loosening the joints of the doll with the tool, "….Is that even possible?"

"Hm? Eh, I dunno… Maybe you'll have to test it out sometime," Max chuckled. "Ah, there we go! Free… But, yeah, I answered most of her questions…"

"And?"

"She needs to go buy some stuff and she wants you to go with her."

"Stuff? What kind of stuff?"

"Y-you know, like a bra, or, whatever," Max scratched the back of his head and looked downward at the tile floor of the house. "She wants you there for that one…"

"I, um… Well, I've got a free day today. As long as Fuji's quiet, I'm quiet," Leo placed another coffee mug in the cupboard and turned back around to Max.

Later that morning he dressed himself and went out with Dako, leaving Max and Jared to unpack the house and look after Avery. Leo drove her to a local mall, and walked beside her down the path.

"Here," Dako tugged at Leo's jacket sleeve, and Lupin looked to the shop and did a double take as he came into visual contact with the lingerie wearing mannequins in the front of the shop.

"A-aren't those a little m-mature for you?" Leo asked with a sputter. "How about Kid GAP?"

Dako looked upward at him tiredly, "Yeah, if I was eight… Come on." She took Leo by the hand and pulled him into the shop. Leo made it a point to find a worker in the shop and then have her aid his daughter, and then walked about like a lost puppy.

He held up one of the bras, and in a small attempt at humor, asked the woman at the register, "Um, do you have this in my size?" he cleared his throat and set it back on the rack, and then continued to walk about with his hands in his pockets.

"All done," Dako stepped out of the dressing room with several items in her hand. Leo silently paid and looked away as the woman at the register placed Dako's items in the bag, and then walked out with her beside him.

"….So…." Leo cleared his throat and glanced at Dako, "….You…. Get everything you need?"

"…I'm going to get you a drink, you look like you're gonna pass out," muttered Dako, who handed Leo her bag.

Leo waited until Dako was well away from him and in the food court and slowly opened the bag, "_B_!" he gaped as he read over the label. He closed the bag tightly as she returned, and they continued to walk down the length of the mall.

"So, um, are you seeing anyone right now?" Leo asked before he sipped his smoothie.

"No. Why?" Dako asked with a raised eyebrow as she took her turn sipping her drink.

"Eh… No reason…. Um, well, it's just that, you go from watching cartoons to asking questions about things, so I—"

"Did you not want me to ask them?" Dako asked.

"Eh, no, I'm glad," Leo seated himself on a bench and motioned for Dako to follow him in suite, which she did. "I just want to know if there's like something that brought all of this on, you know?"

"Yeah, I know," Dako murmured. "I've just been curious, is all… If you guys would break down and get a satellite, this wouldn't be an issue."

"No, I'd rather go through all of the awkwardness than have you watching porn."

"Didn't you make something like that?"

"….Why? How did you even—Dad!"

"I-it was on his computer and I accidentally opened it!" Dako sputtered, "I was looking for the card games on there! I didn't find it on purpose!"

"Owww….."

"What's wrong?"

"Smoothie headache," Leo lied and rubbed his forehead. "So, you saw that, and that's what started the questions… Now what about the—"

"I didn't see much, I exited out quick, I promise."

"It's all right, Dako, I believe you. I just wish Dad, who is an expert thief and mastermind, would learn to put a LOCK on some files!... Jeeze…."

"And I bought the other stuff because I just wanted to. It's like how you wear a purple jacket and orange tie."

"Hey, this is the style, or it will be, someday…"

"Yeah, when everyone's blind," Dako snorted.

Leo placed an arm around her shoulders and sighed, "I'm glad I get the nice part and Max got to cover all of the difficult biology."

"He was pretty good at explaining it. It's like he's had to do that before."

"Eh, yeah, well, I'm sure he's had a lot of experience in that area."

Mexico:

"You're stealing reel-to-reels?" Ryo chuckled. "Why don't you take an 8-track player while you're at it?"

"These are special though, Ryo-san," Fuji answered with her own confident smile. "These could be worth thousands!"

"Mmm hmm…. Why?"

"They're lost tracks from the Beatles!"

"Didn't they open the vaults and empty them?" asked Toshiro, looking up from the play he was reading. "Yeah, they did that in 95', Fuji…"

"Oi, don't you think I know this!" Fuji sighed heavily, "I've got a copy of the _Anthology_ CDs too, okay!... What I'm saying is they found more tracks, and they're going up for auction!"

"So we're going to steal them?" Yukiko concluded.

"We will; you're going to get your sonogram, mommy. I need to know if I've got to buy pink or blue stuff for your baby shower!"

"I'm not having a baby shower," Yukiko lifted her fedora from her eyes and glared at Fuji. "I don't need one. I'll be fine."

"Na-ah, Yukiko-chan! I need something to spoil! And it probably won't be as expensive as Heiji… Damn I miss him! I wish he'd take time off, or something!" Fuji moaned in a childish manner, "I've been getting lonely, if you know what I mean."

"Eh, I don't wanna," Yukiko answered with a cringe.

"It's only gonna be me, Ryo-san, Ally-chan, and you and Toshiro-chan, Yukiko," Fuji said, continuing her pout.

"Actually…." Ryo bit her lip and gave a weak smirk. "I've got to meet someone for a car part…"

"By car part do you mean you're meeting up with Victor to do that which is so unholy it shall not be named?" Fuji asked with a raised eyebrow, "Damn, I've been talking to Peter too much…"

"Eh, call it what you want, but it'll be dinner, mainly," Ryo answered with a shrug, rose, and picked up her suitcase. "I'll be home in a few days…"

Fuji frowned, "Fine, fine—At least I've got you three, right?"

"Ehhhhh…." Toshiro looked off to Yukiko, and the gunwoman rolled her eyes and leaned back in her seat.

"What he's trying to tell you is we're going to have a little downtime up in New York. We've got a house up there, and we still haven't unpacked our crap. So, yeah, we'll probably be up there for the weekend…"

"W-why is everyone telling me this NOW!" Fuji yelped. "Aren't you supposed to give your boss a two week's notice when you go off?"

"Eh, you're more of a team leader than a boss, Fuji," Yukiko explained. "We'll be in New York if you need us."

"Damn it, fine!" Fuji growled. "Everyone's going off to get some except me!... Hmph, it just isn't fair!"

"Eh, I'll help you," Ally sighed. "….I ain't got no one to go to, anyway."

"She still isn't talking to you, Al?" Ryo asked sympathetically. "I'm sorry…"

"Not your fault," Ally shrugged and leaned forward. "You guys have a good time doing whatever—"

"—Whoever—" Fuji was quick to interject.

"—You're doing," said Ally with a slightly annoyed glance to Fuji. Ryo nodded and picked up her suitcase, and was soon gone, and after gathering a few things, Yukiko and Toshiro too had left the hotel room.

"….When did they all get like that?" Fuji wondered quietly, resting her chin on her hand. "Well, looks like it's just you and me now, Ally. What do you say?"

"When do we start?" Ally murmured.

"….Jeeze, try to sound a little more thrilled."

"Sorry, not really in motivation mode right now," Ally shrugged and leaned back in a recliner. "I mean, I feel like a complete loser for not having some excuse to ditch you, too."

"Um, thanks?"

"Yeah, that came out wrong. Sorry 'bout that."

"It's okay, I know exactly where you're coming from. Now let's get those damn reel-to-reels, so we can get down to important business!"

"Important business?"

"Yeah, like hooking you back up with Carmen!"

"Wha…."

Tokyo:

Odori opened her mouth, and actually gave a small laugh. The joke itself hadn't been that funny, nor had she fully understood it, but she still found it amusing. Jordan simply placed his hands his pockets and returned the laughter with a smile.

"See, I knew you had a sense of humor," Jordan lifted up a yawning Namiko and held onto her as they walked down the Tokyo street.

"Perhaps we should get her back to the hotel," Odori eyed the little girl and then looked upward at Jordan. Jordan nodded in return and hailed a cab for them, allowing Odori to seat herself first and then climbing into the leather seat. Odori glanced over at the tall Lupin, and then at her daughter, who was now sleeping in his arms.

"She really likes you," said Odori quietly.

"Eh, well, it's mutual," Jordan answered with a light chuckle. "So is she more like you or her father?"

"It's a little early to tell, but she smiles a lot more than I do, so I think she took on many of Musashi's traits," Odori answered, folding her arms and looking out the cab window at the scenery passing by.

"You still love her dad, don't you?"

"Incredibly so," Odori answered quietly. "To the point where I know I'm foolish for hoping for any sort of relationship with Miyamoto. "It is unfair for her not to have a proper family unit."

"She didn't seem to like it that much if she was behaving the way she was, though," Jordan countered, and Odori nodded quietly. "But I think she just missed you…. Hey, cabbie, this is our stop."

The cab driver nodded and pulled into the hotel parking lot, and the three stepped out and walked up the stairs into the room. Jordan disappeared into the bathroom, and Odori changed Namiko for bed, and laid her down in a playpen she had brought with her. "I'm glad I did not lose you," Odori said to her daughter quietly as she placed a blanket over the young girl and went to unrolling a mat for the night beside the playpen.

"I feel bad for having a lady sleep on the floor," Jordan stood in the doorway of the bathroom, a towel still around his neck from his shower and wearing a pair of sleep pants. Odori looked upward at him and quickly averted her eyes, and flushed.

"It is not a problem, I like this more," Odori admitted, and rose. "Now if you would excuse me, I must change for bed as well. Thank you for dinner tonight."

"Hey, don't forget the carnival. We went to a carnival, too," Jordan added with a chuckle. He heard a phone go off, and quickly walked over to his pants, pulling out his phone from his jean pocket. "Hello? Hey…. You did what? That's terrific… Heh, you know I love you. Good night. It's morning there? Damn… Well, good morning." He hung up the phone, and unbeknownst to him, Odori had overheard this conversation.

"I love you?" Odori muttered beneath her breath as she began to peel away the makeup in front of the bathroom mirror. "I wonder…. Well, that puts him out of the question. I refuse to be someone's side-woman again."

She changed into a white kimono for bed, yawned and lied down upon the floor, adjusting her square pillow and then positioning herself on her tatami mat.

"Hey," Jordan bent down in front of her and kissed her on the forehead. "Good night."

Odori gaped, and pushed him away from her roughly. "Keep away from me!"

"Um, excuse me?" Jordan blinked, seemingly confused by this action.

"I know how those like yourself play, Lupin. You make yourself my friend and then you play me like a bad mahjong game!" Odori snapped.

"Dori, what the heck's your problem? I just…. That was friendly, I didn't mean anything like… What you're thinking…."

"Hrm, do me a favor and save those for the one you love."

"I would, but she's kinda with Clifford the Big Red dork now," Jordan responded with a raised eyebrow.

"Then who was that you were speaking with?"

"…An associate. She found some info on a statue I'm swiping next month. She does that for me…. Most thieves have associates, you know."

"…..She helps you…. But don't you…."

"Gross! She's like fifty!"

"….Oh…. Well, m-my apologies, then."

"Were you listening in on me or something?"

"Not intentionally. It just happened. A lot of things 'just happen' to me," Odori began to lay down once more, looking over at Namiko and her back to Jordan.

"….Are you going to be okay?"

"I am fine. I am just sorry for listening in on your conversation. I did not mean to."

"I…. Okay, then. You know, you looked nice tonight. A lot of women can't pull off makeup, but you really did."

"….Thank you," a stunned Odori answered, blinking a few times. "I…. Hm. Thanks."

"Good night," Jordan smirked and rose, then seated himself on the edge of the bed.

"So you think I'm attractive?" Odori asked in a low voice.

"Yeah," Jordan gave a nod and chuckled. "And why are you asking?"

"No reason. Just to warn you that my daughter comes first," Odori stated sternly.

"Don't worry, I have no intentions of dating you, Odori."

Odori frowned at this comment, "And why the hell not?"

Mexico:

"Out of all of the places, Mexico!" Ally whispered into his headset. "It's hot as a frying pan in the morning and freezing at night… This place can't seem to make up its mind!"

"Hm," Fuji gave a small smirk and lowered herself a little further into the office. "Yeah, this place is funny like that."

"Is something wrong? You're usually the one doing all of the yapping," Ally said with slight worry. "What's up, Fuji?"

"How long's it been, since that thing happened between us?" asked Fuji.

"Gee, I dunno… A month, maybe?" Ally answered, "About a month and a half? Why do you ask?"

"Because I'm late," Fuji answered, "…I'm at the vault."

"Late? For what?" Ally inquired.

"Do I have to spell it out for you?" Fuji sighed and removed a stethoscope from about her neck, and pressed it against the vault.

"Woah, like you're…. Are you sure?"

"No, not really," Fuji answered with a whisper. "I'm gonna do a test when I get home…. Ah, got the lock! Hee hee, yes!"

"….And it's…. Well, if it is…. It's mine?"

"Yours or Heiji's."

"WHAT? You don't KNOW?"

"Yeow! Ally, would you cool it? Like I said, I'll know soon enough. Hoist me up, will you? I've got what we came for."

"Y-yeah," a shaken Ally answered. "F-Fuji, I'm not ready for anything like that!"

"Like I am? We'll just take it one step at a time," Fuji placed a note within the emptied safe, waved goodbye to the passed out guards on the floor, and then was lifted through a skylight by Ally, who had became reasonably pale. "You need a drink? I've got some water in the back of the Romeo… Come on, I hear the cops." She jumped off of the roof of the building onto a dumpster and then hopped onto the concrete of the alley. Ally followed soon after, and Ally drove to a drug store while Fuji changed in the back seat of the vehicle.

"Does Heiji know?" asked Ally as he parked the car and looked over at the bright light of the store and then to Fuji.

"I left a message with him to call me when he got out of his Interpol meeting," Fuji answered and hopped out of her seat.

"Hey, um, c-could you get me a bottle of something while you're in there?" Ally asked, loosening the collar of his Chinese-style shirt and slouching down in his seat a bit. Fuji nodded, sauntered into the drug store, and arrived back at the car about ten minutes later with a white bag in hand.

It was still dark when they arrived back in the hotel, and Ally took his bottle and Fuji took her box, and both went their separate ways.

"What in the hell am I gonna tell everyone? What if that kid comes out looking Italian? Holy crap…. Well, with hope, she isn't." He turned his head as she stepped out of the bathroom, a white wand in one hand and the empty box in the other.

"It's blue," said Fuji as she seated herself on the edge of Ally's bed.

"Blue… Meaning….?"

"I'm gonna have to switch the wearing kimonos," Fuji answered with a small sigh, tossing the wand into the empty box.

"You mean… You're…"

"Let's not tell anyone yet. I'll find a way to tell Heiji eventually."

"Crap, I know he's a good friend of mine, b-but I didn't want to experience something like THIS with him!" Ally shouted, brushing his hair back. "Now I definitely won't… God damn it!"

"Ally-chan, it's a cheap test. I'll take another one tomorrow, and I'll go to a doctor, too," Fuji said quietly. "….And if it is positive, well, I… We're the only ones who know about it, so—"

Ally's cell phone went off, and he quickly reached into his pocket and turned away from her, "Hello? Hey! I—You what? Well, I…. Honey, it's a real bad time now, I'm in the middle of a job… C-could I call you back? Yeah… I'm glad to hear you say that…" he hung up the phone, and looked upward at Fuji. "That's Carmen."

"Yeah? What's up with her?"

"She… She wants to talk, to hopefully work things out," Ally answered. He gave a small amused chuckle at the irony, but he was soon sitting on the bed, one hand covering his eyes. Fuji was a little frightened by this; she had never seen Ally cry before. And for the first time in her life she felt like a whore.

The following day, New York City:

"The tapes were supposed to be brought here," the auction house director explained to the jet lag weary Leo and Max. Leo had Avery strapped to him in a sort of backpack, and Max was keeping notes on the case.

"So she swiped them in Mexico City… Now how did they get to Mexico, anyway?" asked Leo with a yawn.

"Well, I—"

"Dako! Jared! Put that down!" Max shouted and turned his attention away from his notes and to the two children, who were looking through ancient Australian masks that were to be brought to auction.

"Sorry, we just…" Leo looked over to Max and his children in embarrassment and then back to the director. "It's a big workload sometimes…"

"You're right, he is no fun…" Jared whispered to Dako as Max led them over to two chairs in the large auction house and seated them in them.

"Now stay," Max ordered sternly, and went back to work.

Dako gave a small smile, looked over to Jared, and then to Avery. Jared returned the expression with obvious confusion, and Dako motioned to Avery, and made a few seemingly nonsensical signs. Avery, in turn, giggled, and began to kick his legs wildly. Jared gave a small snort, and Max shot his head over to the boy and girl.

"What? We stayed," said Dako with a shrug.

"You have quite rambunctious children," said the director with a raised eyebrow.

"Don't I know it," Max muttered, and walked over to the two, and then removed his wallet. "Here, here's ten bucks, go… Do something… Go find a DDR game or some crap."

Dako looked down at the money in her hand, she and Jared both realizing that this was a one hundred dollar bill but not questioning this, and ran out of the room.

"There… Problem solved," Max muttered and went back to writing his notes once again.

"So what can we do with that?" Jared asked, shoving his hands in his jacket pockets.

"I'm thinking lunch, first," Dako answered. "And we'll see where we go from there…"

"Hey," Jared stopped dead in front of a glass case, and frowned. "…This isn't right…"

"Huh? What are you talking about?"

"The guy who pretended to be my dad, he had this in his home… But it was the real thing," Jared said, scrutinizing the swords in front of them. "And these can't be the real ones!"

"Well, there's a way to find out if they're legit or not," Dako shoved the money in her pocket and pulled out a paperclip, and went to fidgeting with the lock. Jared was outwardly nervous at this, but said nothing. She slid open the case, and passed him one of the swords. "Can you tell if they're fake or not?"

"Yeah… There should be a mark…" Jared murmured as he clicked off the safety and slid out the sword.

"Dakota! Jared!" Leo, pale with horror, shrieked as he walked out with Max at his side and the director at the other. "What in the hell are you doing?"

"Oh dead lord…" Max muttered and watched Leo race forward and snatch the weapon out of Jared's hands and set it back inside. Max could not remember ever seeing Leo so angry; he looked ready to kill the first thing in his path.

"I-I'm so sorry," Leo sputtered to the curator.

"It's fine… Considering the line they come from, I'd expect no less," the director answered. Max cringed at Leo's outwardly shocked expression, and led the children out of the building.

"What were you two DOING?" Max asked in a snarl.

"It's fake!" Dako answered. "That sword's a fake!"

"Yeah, it should have a mark but it doesn't!" Jared continued.

"I want you both to go back to the hotel, and stay in there. Don't come out unless there's a fire," Max said in a dark and even tone as he hailed a cab for the two and led them into the back seat.

"Ohhhh this isn't good," Jared muttered as Max slammed the door closed and the cabbie took off.

"I've never seen Papa that angry," Dako whispered.

"This is why I don't like cops," Jared muttered.

Meanwhile, back in the main lobby of the auction house, Leo was sitting on a leather bench, hunched over with Avery still giggling.

"Hey, you okay?" Max seated himself beside Leo and placed a hand on his knee. Leo looked upward at Max and shook his head.

"How… How did she even know how to open a lock like that? That's an advanced lock!" Leo said aloud. "…Unless… Oh my God, I think my Dad's been teaching her!"

"Hey, it could've been Jared," Max said quietly. "He was trained as a ninja for a little bit, remember?"

"I hope you're right… What were they thinking, anyway?" Leo yelled aloud.

"They said that that sword was a fake," Max said with a roll of the eyes. Leo sat up and blinked, and looked over his shoulder at the sword.

"….You know a thing or two about weaponry, right?"

"You, you know who my father is, right?"

"Would you be able to tell a forgery from the real thing?"

"Probably, but we'd need something as evidence," Max murmured and shrugged. Leo smiled, reached into Avery's diaper bag, and pulled out a warrant. Max blinked a few times, and glanced at the diaper bag, "Is that like your briefcase now? What the hell else do you keep in there!"

"Trail mix and some pens," Leo answered, rising to his feet and walking over to the case. "Why am I hoping I'm wrong about this?"

"Because we'll both look like mega-jerks if we aren't," replied Max.

Outside of New York City:

"Isn't this a bit masochistic?" Odori asked with a raised eyebrow as Jordan pulled into the driveway. There was already a yellow Vespa parked, and a package for a computer part on the front porch.

"Extremely," Jordan answered, turning into the driveway and killing the engine. He stepped out, as did the samurai, and Odori knocked on the door. There was the sound of laughing from the other side, and Yukiko opened the door still laughing, Toshiro with his arms about her ever-lengthening waist. Her smile faded as she realized who she was in the presence of, and she cleared her throat and pried Toshiro off.

"I… Um… Wasn't expecting you here…" Yukiko murmured.

"Oh thank GOD! Someone who'll make them stop the love fest!" Heiji said with relief as he too came to the door, his Interpol trench coat in his arms. "I guess I don't have to use the BS excuse that I need to take this to the cleaner's now!"

"May we enter, Jigen?" asked Odori.

"It's Jigen-Ishikawa, Dori," Yukiko responded, adjusting her fedora and not noticing Jordan's outward shudder at this. Toshiro, however, noticed, and gave a small frown.

"Come on in, it's freezing out," Yukiko said, opening the door and stepping out of the way in order for them to enter. "You can keep your shoes on if you want, even though Toshiro's a little bit of a stickler about shoes on the new carpet."

"You're Spartan in the way of furniture," Odori concluded as she looked about at the still barren rooms, save for small pieces of furniture liberally placed about the home.

"We're workin' on it," Yukiko answered with a shrug. "Hey, I've got a shooting range and he's got a place to feed his birds, so we're happy."

"You raise _birds_?" Jordan asked aloud, looking over at the tall redhead. '_She… She left me for this? It's got o be his personality, or… What in the hell did she do leaving me for Woody Woodpecker?'_

"Numerous kinds," Toshiro replied. "I'm working on breeding a variation of pigeons now. Would you care to see them?"

"Maybe in a little," Jordan answered, and felt Namiko, who was near his legs, tug on his hand.

"Dada," Namiko said aloud, causing Yukiko to go into a small line of laughter.

"So you two have been busy, huh?" Yukiko asked curiously as she looked down at the pigtailed girl.

"Ehhh…. It's a long story…" Jordan answered nervously.

"Odori lets you touch her?" Heiji frowned. "I didn't even think she liked white people… But, I guess when you're like her, you can't be picky."

"Heiji!" Odori snarled, and reached for her sword. Heiji quickly disappeared into the living room, and she relaxed her position once again.

"So, does that happen a lot?" Jordan asked Odori.

"More often than it should," Odori responded. "Now down to business."

"I'll put on tea; it usually means bad news when she says that," said Toshiro, who soon afterward exited into the recesses of the home.

Jordan looked about the surroundings of the house, and then back to Yukiko, "…..He raises _birds_?"


	30. Can't Take My Eyes off of You

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Lupin, and my brain it soft from writing term papers xx

Howdy and hello!

Someone put a Mach 5 model car on my computer table, and I know this was out of spite, somehow… No offense to the _Speed Racer_ fans, but not a huge fan of the show… ' Anyway, this chapter's uber late, but between holidays and finals and my mother's war with the neighbor across the street on who can put up the most Christmas lights, I've been a bit preoccupied. I only hope that the next chapter will come out sooner. By the way, thanks to Ashley for a _really_ good idea…

Fun Fact of Boredom: Speaking of _Speed Racer_, if you ever take a look at the drawings I've done for characters, you'll see that Ryo's is indeed based off of Speed Racer's outfit.

Chapter thirty: Can't Take my Eyes off of You

"What are you watching?" Max seated himself beside Leo on the bed and glanced at the television, then to Lupin. "I didn't even know you watched TV, Leo…"

"I don't, usually, and it's _Gigantor_…" Leo shrugged then nodded toward the television.

"_Testujin_…. Please not this… My father watched this…. Between this and _Manzinger_…. I almost went nuts."

"Does old anime annoy you, Max?"

"It's crap… It's like twelve frames a minute… Annoys me to no end," Max muttered and took a handful of popcorn from the bowl at Leo's side. "The kids still mad at you?"

"Two aren't speaking to me, and the other one doesn't even know why everyone's mad…" Leo gave a small sigh and leaned against Max. "I guess I know what your world's like now that Dako won't talk to me…"

"Listen, you had the right to be mad… I can't blame you," Max sighed and turned to Leo, and gave a small smile, "C'mon, you look terrible when you look annoyed like that… I like you more with that worried expression that shows how neurotic you are."

"Ha ha…" Leo rolled his eyes, hopped off of the bed and walked over to Avery's crib, and lifted the little boy out. "So who goes and who stays for his surgery?"

"… I hate having to make a decision like that…" Max murmured, and joined Leo by Avery's side. "…Poor little guy…"

"Hey, he'll be able to hear us for the first time… It's worth it. He doesn't have much to lose," Leo embraced the baby tightly then laid him back down in his crib. He then turned around to face Max, and three moments later was on the floor of the new house, out cold.

A hospital, the following day:

"So it's stress?" Lupin repeated into the phone receiver.

"Yup… Apparently it's starting to eat away at him… They're prescribing him some drugs to take, to keep him calm… He had a pretty bad blow to the head, too, though… He fell on tile. They don't know if it's a concussion yet, or something else," Max rubbed his forehead and looked across the hospital waiting room and the apprehensive Dako and Jared. Avery was in a carrier at his side, gurgling as he usually did. "I have to let you go now, Lu—"

"Dad. I'm Dad, now… How many times do I have to tell you that?" Lupin sighed. "Thanks for the update… Fujiko's been freaking out all day… She's done everything short of wanting to go to church!"

"What a bad time for a vacation, eh?" Max asked with a wry laugh.

"You're tellin' me. I'll talk to you later, Max. Bye," Lupin hung up his phone, and moments after closing his cell phone, Leo stepped out of the hospital room, his orange tie hung about his neck and his hands in his pockets.

"Are you all right?" Max asked, jumping up front his seat quickly to Leo.

"…I'm feeling better than I have in a while…" Leo answered, blinking a few times as if not fully understanding his feelings himself. "They put me on a few medications… A lot of relaxers…."

"You're staying with Ave while I go; you can't take the stress," Max ordered as he and Leo walked out of the hospital waiting room and then out of the hospital with the three children.

Leo nodded and stretched before seating himself in the passenger's side of the car. "You got it, Max… You look nice today…"

"Um…. Thank you…." Max answered, obviously perplexed. He had been complimented by Leo, and within an earshot of others.

"Anyone else hot here?" Leo looked over at Jared and Dako, and both shook their heads. "Heh, must be just me… C'mon, let's get going… Avery's doctor is just down the street."

Leo gave a nod and glanced back at the little boy with a frown, and then set his sites on the road ahead him.

New York:

"So it's going up now, huh?" Fuji placed a hand upon Ally's shoulder and gave it a light squeeze then seated herself beside him on the bed. They both looked out the window of the penthouse, down at Times Square, down at the giant Christmas tree that was being erected.

"….Yeah…." Ally muttered numbly. "You get that test done yet?"

"Yeah, but I didn't tell Heiji," Fuji said quietly. "Not really a need to…"

Ally snapped his head in Fuji's direction and stared at her, wide-eyed, "Did you…"

"No, no… It's growing in a fallopian tube…."

"Meaning?"

"Here's the uterus," Fuji held up a fist, and then extended a finger on her other hand, "And here's the tube. It's growing in the tube… There really isn't anything for it in there… It, um… It can't survive in there."

"So you miscarried?" Ally gaped. "F-Fuji, I'm so sorry…"

"It's okay. I just kinda wish I knew if it was a girl or boy," Fuji shrugged. "I kind of would've liked to know whose it was, too."

"Well, you and Heiji'll probably go off and have some nice ones," said Ally with a sad smile. He placed an arm about her shoulders and sighed. "Are you gonna be okay?"

"I'll live," Fuji answered quietly. She jerked her head as she heard a noise from the front of the hotel, but her shoulders relaxed as Odori stepped in with Namiko.

"Dori-chan, how was the date? You take my brother for a test drive, yet?" Fuji asked with a wink.

"She and Young Lee should never meet…." Odori muttered beneath her breath as she let the little girl touch her feet upon the floor and run to Fuji.

"Mm, Namiko-kun! I thought we weren't gonna ever see you again, for a second!" Fuji said as she picked up the little girl and embraced her tightly. "Then I remembered who your mother was, and she wouldn't stand for anything like that!"

Ally simply looked, on stunned. How Fuji was able to go from the extreme depression she had been in moments ago to such a happy-go-lucky attitude was beyond him, but he knew that it probably required an unbelievable amount of strength upon Fuji's part.

"So, Jordan, are you a stepdad yet?" Fuji asked with a Cheshire grin.

"Heh, in your dreams…" Jordan muttered.

"Dada!" Namiko called and flapped her arms wildly, and Fuji looked over to Jordan once again, with a small smirk.

"She's just a little confused…. What, she's a baby! She's just… Confused…" Jordan muttered, folding his arms.

"That's a shame; I always thought you'd be the best parent out of any of us…" Fuji sighed and set Namiko down upon the floor, and allowed her to run to her mother.

"Heh, yeah… But Ari's the one with the wildlife, not me," Jordan smirked as Namiko ran over to Odori and tugged on the leg of her mother's gi and whined to be lifted up. Odori did so with a smile and a roll of the eyes.

"She's taller than you almost, Dori!" Fuji chuckled, then turned to Jordan. "Do you like have to put Dori on a stool or something so you two can make out?"

"My height and what I do in my spare time are none of your business!" a red-faced Odori snarled.

Jordan gave a chuckle and patted Odori on the shoulder, "Eh, she's just jealous of you, I'll bet."

"Ohhhh yeah, big time jealous," Fuji snorted. "Now if you two excuse me, I have to call and check in on our nephew, Jordan."

"Yeah, I sent Ari some flowers and a toy for the kid…. Putting up with a Zenigata and having a kid with a disability, yeesh…"

"I think God's seeing how much it'll take to see him snap," Fuji chuckled lightly, then walked into her room, closing the door behind her. She wiped her eyes from where tears were fighting to come out, then walked to the phone beside her bed. She dialed the number which she knew by heart now, and was surprised to hear Max answer.

"He took him in, I'm watching after the other kids," Max explained.

"You ever think about maybe quitting the chase, Zenigata?" Fuji asked as she reclined back upon her bed. "I mean… You've got three kids now… Either of you two running around wouldn't be fair to them."

"I'll quit running when you do, Lupin," Max answered. "It's my duty as a Zenigata to chase you until I catch you."

"But you caught a Lupin, already, Zenigata!" Fuji chuckled. "You've got my brother!"

"…..Doctor's here," Max lied after seeing he could make no smart retort to this very true statement. "I have to let you go."

"Okay, I'll call tonight to see how he did!" Fuji said in a singsong tone and hung up her phone.

"Yeah…" Max closed the phone, and looked down at the cheap linoleum tile beneath his feet, and then up as the doctor passed through the door, about five minutes later.

"He's sleeping now, but we'll wake him in a little while to check in on him…" the doctor explained.

"And where's my husband?" Max asked, glancing over the doctor's shoulder at the ER doors.

"That was your husband I was talking about," the doctor chuckled. "It's in a corner of an office…. You can go on back and pick him up. Your son's in surgery now, we estimate the time to be between two and three hours… There's a coffee shop down the street you can go to while you're waiting, if you like."

"Thanks, Doctor," Max nodded and followed the doctor through the swinging doors and into an office where Leo sat in a chair, slumped over snoring. Max kneeled down in front of him and shook him awake, and Leo opened his eyes and blinked as he began to focus.

"Hey, sweetie," Leo smiled and kissed Max briefly, then rose and straightened his tie. "Let's go wait outside..."

"….Urm, s-sure," a confused Max replied, and followed Leo out to Dako and Jared. "H-how are you feeling, Leo?"

"Great, thanks… I'm worried about Avery, but I know those doctors'll do a great job on him," said Leo with a confident smile. "That one surgeon, he was kinda cute, don't you think?"

"….How about you go head to the gift shop with Dako…? We'll need a warmer blanket to take Avery home in," Max shoved his hands in his pockets and tried not to let it show that he was beginning to actually become a little frightened.

"Good idea," Leo lifted Dako up from her chair, much to her surprise, and chuckled. "Come on, Dako, you want to race for it?"

"I'm fine…. Crazy…." Dako replied. Leo ruffled her hair and walked out of the room with her at his side, and Jared turned to Max.

"You didn't tell me he got like that," Jared pointed to the doors which still swung, and Max shrugged his shoulders and seated himself next to his older son.

"I… I didn't know he got like that…" Max answered, seating himself in one of the uncomfortable chairs of the hospital.

Upstate New York:

"All right, snow!" Yukiko smiled as the first flakes fell onto the ground of Toshiro's property. The samurai came up behind her and put his hands on her shoulders and also looked happily at the sight.

"Are you okay?" he asked worriedly as he felt Yukiko jerk and grip onto her stomach.

"Yeah… It just kicked…" Yukiko answered.

"What's 'it' going to be, anyway?"

"Na-ah… Not until Christmas," Yukiko warned.

"C'mon… Yukiko…" Toshiro sighed and sat down in the window sill and looked upward at her beggingingly.

"Nooo way," Yukiko adjusted her fedora and made her way into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator door in search of leftovers. Fortunately for her, both she and Toshiro celebrated Thanksgiving, so there were plenty to be found.

"Our visitors are here!" Toshiro shouted from his perch.

"Great… The whole gang… Color me thrilled…" Yukiko muttered with a roll of the eyes as she peeled back a sheet of tin foil and retrieved a knife from one of the drawers.

"Eh, I was wrong… It's just these two," Toshiro said with slight dismay as he followed behind Ryo and Victor. "…I'm gonna go string up lights…"

'_Yeah, leave me to deal with Ryo's freaky boyfriend… You're so getting the couch tonight, Toshiro,'_ Yukiko thought with a glare as Toshiro hastily exited with a large ball of lights underneath his arm.

"Hey, Yuki!" Ryo embraced her sister and then stepped back and joined hands with Victor.

"Do you want me to cut that? I'm good with knives…" Victor took a step forward, and Yukiko immediately took a step away from him.

"I know, that's why I didn't really want you in here," Yukiko said defensively.

"Hey Yu—bastard!" Jordan stepped into the kitchen, followed by Fuji behind him. Fuji rolled her eyes and vanished into the living room, where the other members of her group were situated, and figured she would leave the fighting to them.

"You know, I'm trying desperately to redeem myself, but you're not exactly helping," Victor growled.

"Maybe that's because I don't trust you," Jordan shot back.

"Hey, guys… Come on, not in my kitchen…" Yukiko sighed and set down her knife as she saw the fight begin to escalate.

"Yeah… Victor, come on…" Ryo quietly took him by the arm, but Victor only wriggled out of her grasp and took a step toward Jordan. He attempted to intimidate Jordan, but Jordan was nearly half a foot taller than Lupin, so this failed.

"If you're gonna fight, do it outside," said Toshiro sternly as he appeared in the kitchen doorway.

"Listen, I don't even let my parents tell me what to do, I definitely don't need you doing it," Jordan snapped.

"Seems like we finally agree about something…" Victor smirked.

"Don't even _start _to categorize me with you," Jordan hissed.

"Do you _want_ to take this outside?" Victor stepped closer to Jordan, and Toshiro took a step closer inbetween the two.

"Come on… Not this close to the holidays…" Toshiro said warningly.

"Do I have to tell you again to butt out?" Jordan snapped in Toshiro's direction.

"This is my damn house!" Toshiro shouted.

"Toshiro… Jordan…." Yukiko muttered beneath her breath as Ryo laid a hand on her shoulder. "Guys… Come on, knock it off…"

"Do you want to start something here, too, samurai?" Victor asked with a chuckle.

"Listen, I didn't even KNOW vampires were allowed into a house without permission," Toshiro said coldly to Victor.

"That's the best you can come up with? Vampire? I've been called worse by my own blood…" Victor placed his hands in his pockets and leaned against the counter of the kitchen and looked upward at Jordan. "I think sometimes that my own blood would like to see me dead…"

"No, you think?" Jordan scoffed. "It took you this long to figure it out, you Hannibal Lector, Hans Gruber wannabe!"

"I have no idea who that second guy is, but you're going down!" growled Victor.

Jordan drew back his arm, clenched his fist, and punched, sending Victor to the floor, "He's the villain from _Die Hard_, dumb ass!" he shouted as he stormed out the back door, leaving Victor to wipe away the blood from his face while Ryo tended to him.

"This ends now…" Toshiro retrieved his swords from the living room and pushed his way past Yukiko to the sliding glass doors out to the back yard, and found Jordan smoking a cigarette. "I understand you wanting to visit, but don't think you can use my house as a battle ground for your personal quarrels!"

"Do you always sound like that?" Jordan wondered, tossing the cigarette on the snowy ground and turning about to face Toshiro. "…Just like Goemon."

"You don't know crap about my father… Don't pretend you do," Toshiro began to strap his swords upon his back, and placed his hand about the handle of one.

"You sound threatened…" Jordan said quietly. "I'm not here for Yukiko, if that's what you're getting at… I can't blame you for wanting to protect her. God knows I tried."

"No one has control of a girl like that, though," Toshiro smirked and spoke tensely to Jordan.

"You wanna fight me, Toshiro? It… I kind of seems like that, doesn't it?"

"I know barely anything about you except that when you look at my wife I get an uneasy feeling…"

"Maybe I just think she could've done better."

"What, like you?"

"And I didn't think they got more arrogant than Goemon…"

"What'd you say about my father?"

"You heard me… He's arrogant!" Jordan shouted. "I know mine's a deadbeat, so why don't you come to terms with your family?"

"Yukiko, this looks bad…" Ryo muttered as she and her older sister looked out the window of the kitchen.

"He punched me right in the jaw!" Victor moaned.

"Honey, here…." Ryo sighed and wrapped up a steak that Yukiko had left to thaw out on the counter with a dish towel and pressed it against his face. "Come on… We'll get you into the living room, all right?"

"I'm gonna go break up the little testosterone tango they've got goin' on out there…" Yukiko muttered, adjusting her fedora and pulling on a coat on her way out. She drew her gun and fired a single shot from the porch, landing in between Jordan and Toshiro. This, naturally, silenced both men.

"Hey, I need to get the Christmas lights up… You two are both tall. Have fun, ladies, they're in the garage," Yukiko said calmly.

"I know! I put them in there!" Toshiro shouted, but this fell on deaf ears. Yukiko was already back in the house, chopping away at the vegetables in front of her violently.

"….I'm afraid for people who'll have to be _around_ your guys kids," Jordan said with a shake of the head as he followed Toshiro to the garage.

"Good to know I'm not the first one she whipped," Toshiro muttered.

Paris:

"So, they're relaxers?" Dako asked Max.

"Yeah…"

"And he didn't tell them he was already on another medication?" Jared continued.

"Apparently not…" Max stopped walking down the street, and sighed as he looked onward at Leo. Lupin came around and placed his arms about Max's neck, and chuckled. "What's so funny?"

"You listen to a lot of oldies, Max?" Leo asked.

"Eh…. Yeah, considering my parents are old…"

"You ever hear of a Frankie Vallie song?"

"Eh, which—Oh, no…" Max placed a hand over his eyes as he knew where this was going.

"Bah-dum, bah-dum, ba, da-dah-dum… I love you, baby! And if it's quite all right I need you baby, and if it's quite all right, I need you baby, to warm the lonely nights! Trust in me when I sayyyyy! Ohhhh pretty baby, don't bring me down on prayer, pretty baby!" Leo sang and took Max by the hands and spun him about once in the middle of the street while Dako and Jared stood looking at the scene with the rest of the stunned crowd that passed by.

"L-Leo!" Max sputtered.

"I thought you liked my singing voice!" Leo chuckled and broke hold of Max, jumping onto a light post and looking down at Zenigata. He swung about it once and looked downward at Max, and chuckled. "So I love you. So if they have a problem with it, they can go get on their soapboxes and say so… But I **do not** care. They can just go burn, for all I care! Ha ha!"

"…Aren't you supposed to call the doctors if he acts weird?" Dako asked.

"Yeah…" Max nodded, and let out a yelp as Leo jumped and landed in front of him.

"Come on, Ave is coming home soon, and it'll be great!" Leo kissed Max on the cheek and placed an arm about his waist, "Now what do you say we head back to the hospital for a bit, eh? And then home…"

"Errrr….. Track down… Lupin… We have to…"

"Eh, she'll be there when we get there—She wouldn't pass up the chance to make fun of us," Leo shrugged.

New York:

"You mind finishing up?" Toshiro looked up at Jordan and clasped his hands together for warmth. "It's just plugging in, now."

"Where are you running off to?" Jordan set down another strand on lights on the roof of the two-story home and glanced at his handiwork.

"Work," Toshiro smiled and stepped onto the ladder perched aside his house, jumping off of the ladder after only stepping down a few rungs.

"Work? Like… _Work_ work?"

"It isn't work if you like doing it…"

"Yeah, but… You work? What the hell do you do, anyway? Sales?"

"Broadway."

"….She left me for a Broadway pansy? Am I a jerk and don't know it?" Jordan muttered to himself as he watched Toshiro pull his gi tighter and walk to his Vespa, and hop on. "And he drives that!... She must've hit her head, or something…. Please tell me she hit her head…"

"Yo, you finished!" Yukiko called. "You want a drink?"

"You call the lowly worker in while the husband's out? What am I, your pool boy?" Jordan chuckled and climbed down the ladder, and took one of the coffee mugs Yukiko held in her hand. "What is this stuff?"

"Hot chocolate… I don't like drinking a lot of caffeine with the baby," Yukiko shrugged and took a sip from her cup, and noted Jordan's curious expression at this statement. "….Too cold out for you? Why don't we go out for a walk?"

"…That sounds good," Jordan nodded, set the cup down on one of the wooden stairs of the deck in the backyard, and zipped up his jacket as he followed Yukiko into the woods surrounding the house.

"I can tell that you don't like him," Yukiko did not turn to face Jordan as she spoke, but only continued to walk through the white forest beside him.

"Well… I don't _hate _him or anything… He just doesn't seem like you type, is all. I mean, nothing like you. At least we had some common interests!"

"Well, you know what they say about differences, eh? Now… What about you and Dori?"

"She's nice," Jordan said with a shrug.

"Nice, that's it?" Yukiko smirked. "Come on… She's a lot younger than you and I know you've gotta love that. You're gonna be forty in what, less than a decade?"

"Shush…"

"Ha, you really haven't changed, when it comes to vanity…."

"No, I mean, shush," Jordan grabbed her by the shoulder and pulled a gun, and circled about the dead woods.

"Damn it, look out!" Yukiko shouted as she spotted a snipe from a tree a few hundred yards away. There was a shot fired, and she and Jordan took off running, this being a little more difficult in her present state. She still managed to retrieve her gun and fire a shot, but missed, and soon after lost her balance and began to fall. Jordan was quick to catch her and set her on the ground, and looked about for the sniper silently.

"Come on… Where are you….?" Jordan whispered. Another bullet was sounded off, and both looked in the direction of it, just in time to see the sniper tumble out of one of the many black trees onto the earth beneath him.

"I told you following them would be a good idea…" Fuji smiled and placed her gun back in its holster, and Heiji nodded in response.

"F-Fuji? What the hell?" Yukiko choked. "You were spying on us!"

"I was looking for you… As usual, some things went wrong," Fuji rolled her eyes and sighed, glancing over at Heiji briefly. Heiji simply shrugged and walked over to Yukiko to help her stand upon her feet.

"How many things? One moment we're stealing practice session tapes for _A Hard Day's Night _and now some bozo's trying to shoot at me!" Yukiko cried, and gripped onto her aching lower back. "Why is it when it rains, it pours?"

"It's all connected, believe it or not," Heiji said.

"What? I know there are some rabid fans of the music out there, but I don't think I've met any that crazy in a while," Jordan glanced over his shoulder at the snipe and then turned his attention back to his walk with the others.

"Apparently there's a lot more to this than we imagined… Those tapes are fake," Fuji said with a heavy sigh.

"Told you," Heiji muttered.

"….There's a bunch of fake merchandise, and it's all coming out of one area," Fuji continued, ignoring Heiji's previous statement.

"And where's that?" asked Yukiko.

"You won't believe it," Fuji said with a shake of the head. "I doubt I do."

Inside the house:

"No way!" Ally shouted. "There's no way she'd EVER allow that!"

"Al, all the signs point to it," Fuji sighed and looked downward at the tape on the coffee table. "There's information written all over this tape… And it's in Capran."

"You don't know what it says, though!" Ally shouted. "It might not be anything bad!"

"They already made pretty good forgeries… There's got to be a reason. These have got to be part of something bigger."

"But we don't know anyone that knows Capran," Ryo pointed out.

"Maybe you don't, but I do," Fuji smiled and rose. "Just gimme a few days, and I'll have a translator here!"

"You don't mean…." Ryo trailed off, not even daring to speak what she knew Fuji was thinking.

"These can't be fakes… They look legit!" Ally sputtered.

"They're fake…" Victor said reassuringly.

"Oh, like you've ever said anything honest in your life! How in the hell would you know?" Ally growled.

Victor rose and towered over Ally as he spoke, "Because on the tape John Lennon wouldn't be able to hit a high note like he does in one of those songs, which is why Paul McCartney had to sing a part of _A Hard Day's Night_ for him, because his voice couldn't reach that pitch!"

"….How do you even KNOW that?" Heiji asked after a pause. "I'm a nerd, and I didn't even know that!"

"I grew up in Great Britain, I know a thing or two about the musicians from there," Victor snapped, and stormed away from Ally. "I may be a bastard, but I'm not an idiot…"

Ally shook his head and exited the living room, and ran out of the house through the back door. Yukiko went to run after him, but Ryo put a hand on her sister's shoulder.

"He just needs some time to himself," Ryo said quietly, and looked over at Fuji. "You're going to take care of our translation?"

"Yup… Done and done," Fuji smiled.

Two days later:

"…He's smiling again," Dako looked up from her video game controlled at Max, and Jared shuddered. "You know what that means, right?"

"Ew…" Jared shuddered, and both children looked over as Leo followed Max out, dressed out of his character. He had shed the orange tie and purple jacket and opted for wearing the black dress shirt and jeans.

"Heya, guys!" Leo ruffled the hair of both children as he passed, and Dako gave a heavy sigh. She had spent almost a half hour on her hair, and now it would have to be redone. She would not say anything to Leo, though; Max had told them to be as understanding as possible.

Leo's MRI was inconclusive, but the doctors had agreed that something had been jarred in his brain from the hard fall he had taken. The medication had affected him very little, and Max was stunned to find that Leo had not even taken one of the relaxer pills. So it was unknown if the affects of his blow would be temporary or not.

"How are we doing today, eh?" Leo lifted up Avery from his crib gently and smiled at the baby, who still wore a bandage over the one ear that they had performed surgery on.

"Leo, we got a call…" Max began as he walked back into the living room with his gun holster now over his dress shirt. "I already talked with your parents, and Avery can stay with them…"

"It gets harder and harder to leave them each time, don't you think?"

"Eh, yeah…"

"You know, I've thought about being a stay-at-home dad," Leo announced to Max as Zenigata took a sip from his coffee mug on the table in the middle of the living room. This statement made Max choke upon his coffee, and Dako and Jared attempted to hold back a chuckle.

"….W-Where did that even come from?" Max wiped his mouth clean and walked back over to Leo. "C-Could I talk to you for a few minutes in private?"

"Sure," Leo smiled, and turned to Dako and Jared. "You guys wouldn't mind watching your brother, would you?"

"No," both answered in a monotone voice, never turning their attention away from the television screen. Leo set the baby done, and Max promptly yanked Leo out onto the back porch.

"What's going on with you?" Max asked in a whisper. "I-I mean, this is _nothing_ like you!"

"What, you want the neurotic back?" Leo smiled and seated himself on the swing in the corner of the porch. Max joined him soon after, and continued while looking out around the property. Paris was lit up for the holidays, and was visible from a ways away.

"No, it's just…"

"Then don't worry about it," Leo shrugged.

"Huh?"

"Just don't look a gifthorse in the mouth… I'm sure you're familiar with that phrase…"

"Wha—I… O-oh, yeah…." Max flushed as he recalled the last time Leo had said this to him, and cleared his throat. "We'll talk about you maybe staying home with the kids later… The last time we tried that a guy ended up dead."

Leo laughed and nodded in agreement, "Okay, Max… So where're we working from now?"

"New York. You sister swiped a full set of samurai armor," Max answered. "And possibly Cagliostro, too, on counts of forgery."

"Cagliostro?" Leo repeated with confusion. "We go from forgery to Cagl—Ohhhh yeah, they got in trouble for that before, didn't they?"

"Yup," Max nodded. "Lupin might only be one little piece in this puzzle…"

"I really hate when other players get in the game… She should really give it up already and take a nice long vacation…" Leo muttered darkly.

Max blinked a few times, and nodded numbly, then continued to look out at the scenery in front of him. He soon became aware of a pair of eyes staring at him, and turned his head to Leo slowly.

"How about eh… You just stay a while? It's just the two of us, you know…" Leo asked with a smile.

Max gaped, and rose from the swing, "Perv…"

"Later, then, I'm guessing," Leo chuckled, and followed Max back into the house.

New York:

"Did you have to steal something that ugly to get their attention?" Jordan sighed in disgust and looked in his rearview mirror at the hulking suit of armor and then back at Fuji.

"Hey, it was valuable, I was short on time, and I needed to get a message out to them," Fuji shrugged. "At least Toshiro's letting us store it at his theater until we get Blondie and bro here… It's no use returning something if they aren't here… They won't come for just nothing. Unlike Zenigata, they have lives."

"I turn here, right?" Jordan pointed to a brick building, and Fuji nodded in response. "And I'll get the jolly red giant to help me lug that in…"

"Good… Because I'm a princess and I don't need to be carrying things like that," Fuji chuckled. Jordan groaned, shook his head and parked in an alley on the side of the building, and found the back door opened easily. He was greeted with a loud series of noises, and cautiously continued deeper and deeper into the building, until he found himself at the back of a stage.

"Aki, gringo…" one small Spanish child whispered to another, and both gave Jordan a suspicious glance.

"Okay… Now, Tameela, I want you to try that bend again, more like this, though," Jordan heard Toshiro's deep New Yorker voice against the numerous chirps of the children's voices, and peered from behind a large red curtain, and saw Toshiro, surrounded by a large group of children of all different ethnicities, and all around three feet shorter than himself.

"Could we get the music?" Toshiro called, and moments later a holiday tune resonated from ancient speakers. "Great, that's great!" Toshiro smiled in satisfaction as the children began a dance routine which he had taught them. He walked up and down the aisles of kids, occasionally correcting one, or showing them an easier way to pull off a move. Jordan tried not to give off a laugh as he noticed many of the young female students, especially the ones who were near-teenagers.

"And lift," Jordan stepped forward and grabbed onto Toshiro by the waist, briefly lifting him up off of the ground and then setting him down once again, mildly confused.

"Okay, everyone… Break time," Toshiro called, and the girls especially moaned in disappointment.

"I think Yuki's got a little competition," Jordan chuckled as he watched the children disperse. "Fuji brought that stupid suit of armor and wanted me to tell you that as soon as Leo translates whatever that message is, you all are heading out to Cagliostro."

"You're not coming?"

"Eh, I've got my own gang to tend to," Jordan shrugged. "I work alone, usually, but they've kind of attached themselves to me."

"I know any of them?"

"Heh, yeah. Gabe, Peter, Alsenia and Chris," Jordan sighed. "They all lost their jobs after their bosses found out who their family was… So, yeah, they've prettymuch become my gang…"

"You don't sound thrilled."

"Between Chris being moody, Peter's praying me and telling me how I'm going to hell for not being a Christian, Gabe's just… Gabe-ness, and Alsenia's alpha personality, I don't get as much as rest as I used to."

"You mean that our gang's an escape?"

"Heh, hell no… Half of you guys are crazy, the other half's depressing, and Victor's going to wake up and find himself dead one of these days."

"Wake up to… That doesn't even make sense…"

"Like I said, I haven't been getting a lot of sleep. Anyway, what do you say we load up that armor?"

"Sounds good."

"Hey, do you hate me as much as I think you do?" Toshiro asked as he threw on a coat over his sweat-suit that he wore for practice.

"Eh, nah… You're just so mismatched with Yukiko I'm still trying to figure you two out."

"You and me both," Toshiro admitted with a chuckle.

The next day, Kennedy airport:

"You want what?" Fuji blinked once again, not quite understanding what Odori had said.

"I wish to take a sabbatical," Odori repeated.

"Where?" Fuji ventured to ask.

"Eh, she's going to help train a few of my guys," Jordan shrugged. "Nothing major. I'll have her home by Christmas."

"So… You? And you?" Fuji chuckled, and put a hand over her mouth. "Okay… You two have fun… Just remember to stay safe."

"We will," Odori reassured her, and adjusted Namiko in her arms.

"And if you two get married, don't make it shotgun!" Fuji said with a wave. "I want to get pictures of Goemon's face when he sees his son-in-law!"

"Die…" Odori began to run toward Fuji to pounce, but Jordan gripped onto one of her shoulders and shook his head.

"Come on, we'll miss the flight," he nodded, and Odori followed after a moment's hesitation.

"I thought he brought a little too much luggage to the airport with him," Fuji said to herself, and then looked over in the corner of her eye and saw Ryo saying her goodbyes to Victor.

"I'll be home in time for the holiday," Victor said quietly to Ryo.

"Okay… Just don't go looking at anyone else… You're engaged now," Ryo chuckled at Victor's stunned expression, and patted him on the arm. "In other words, that's a 'yes'…."

"I… Well, I may have to shorten my trip some…" Victor muttered. "We meet at my uncle's house, correct?"

"He's the only one with a place big enough," Ryo reached up on her tip-toes and kissed Victor goodbye, and waved to him as he walked to the terminal, and then boarded his flight to London.

"Well, that was precious," Fuji smiled and nudged Ryo. "So engaged now, eh? I guess this means bachelorette party, ehehehe… I'll plan."

"I wouldn't think anything less of you, Fuji," Ryo sighed, and then both women's attention fell upon Ally. He was more tired than usual, and barely spoke to anyone in the gang. Carmen would not pick up his calls, and after more research from Heiji, it was beginning to seem more and more obvious that Cagliostro had not only exported the Beatles' tapes, but other fake merchandise that had been carefully crafted to look authentic. With the country's tight shipping policies, and the miniscule size of the land, it would have been impossible for Carmen not to know what was occurring.

"Maybe there's a way we could cheer him up," Fuji whispered to her best friend.

"Nah, I'd stay out of it, Fuji… I heard, about… Well…" Ryo glanced down at Fuji's stomach and back up at the thief. "And he's depressed over that, too."

"So I guess you think I'm heartless for not caring, don't you?" Fuji asked quietly.

"You just mourn in your own way," Ryo shrugged, and glanced over at the gate for Paris. "They'll be off soon… Having the kids with them ought to slow them down."

"Yeah… Just watch out for those kids… Whoever doesn't want us to find out about their secrets already tried to kill a pregnant lady and… Is that my brother?"

"T-The one who just grabbed onto the blond guy and kissed him in the middle of the airport? Yeah, that's him…"

"If he weren't blood, that'd be so hot," Fuji whispered, and approached the duo. "Well, well, well… You two lovebirds having fun?"

"What, are you jealous?" Leo countered quickly.

"Eh… No… I just…" Fuji was caught off guard by this tone, and shifted from foot to foot for a moment. "…Don't you guys want to arrest me?"

"You bet," Max smiled widely and retrieved a pair of handcuffs from his belt. "I'll even give you a three second start, Lupin."

"Hey, we're hailing a cab, we'll be at the hotel waiting for you after they're done kicking your ass," Dako announced as she walked in between the inspectors and Fuji, tugging Jared along.

"Have fun!" Leo called.

"Damn it, focus, Lupin!" Max growled, "If we don't pay attention, she'll—Where the hell did she go?"

"Over there!" Leo pointed to Fuji, Ryo and Ally, all whom were running towards the exit. "Come on!"

They lost sight of the three eventually, and did not catch up with them until outside the airport. Ally hopped on the back of Toshiro's Vespa and clung onto the samurai as they sped off, and Fuji and Ryo joined Yukiko in the Romeo. Heiji was close behind them, with a police car ready for his fellow Interpol inspectors.

"Floor it!" Max ordered Heiji.

"No, let me have a shot at the wheel. Come on, trust me," Leo guided Max to the back seat and climbed into the driver's side, taking off before Max had even fully gotten into the cruiser.

"It kinda freaks me out that I'm blood related to him," Jared said to Dako.

"Yeah, but _I've_ lived with them longer," Dako countered.

"You kids looking for a lift?" said the cab driver with a thick Eastern-European accent.

"Grand Hotel. Downtown," Dako replied.

"Sure thing," the cabdriver smiled, and zoomed off after the two children climbed into the back seat.


	31. Somewhere they Can't Find Me

DISCLAIMER: Yeah…. I don't own it, but if someone REALLY loves me this Christmas…

Oiiii…

Yeah, sorry, I haven't been having the best week…. I went on brief hiatus after the passing of one my dearest friends, my dog which I loved dearly by the name of Freeway. I owned Freeway for almost six years, and after a long battle with brain cancer, we finally had no other option but to put him out of his suffering on the ninth. He was a good dog, one of my best friends, and I doubt I'll ever be able to top him. Thanks to everyone who helped me through his passing, you all helped me more than you'll ever be able to fathom. I really adored him and I'll miss having him at my feet while I write. And in other news this week there was also the 25th anniversary of the passing of John Lennon, whom anymore who reads this is well aware that I am a huge fan of. Yeah, and my hallway flooded and one in the morning, too. Merry Christmas to me. I only hope the New Year's is better. Thanks again to everyone who reads and supports; writing's what keeps me sane.

This chapter is dedicated to Freeway, as well as to John, two whom I keep in my prayers often.

Fun Fact of Boredom: Throughout the chapters, there are numerous references to other anime, mainly old, although _Naruto_'s also been briefly mentioned. There are especially a lot of references to the Japanese children's show _Doraemon_, which I am a fan of although it officially has never been shown in the U.S. Make a game out of it—See how many references you can count:D (Okayyyy….. You know it's been a heck of a week when I start going into scary happy mode)

Chapter Thirty-one: Somewhere they can't Find Me

"Okay… Okay, Max, c-calm down—Hey, you can't say that word!" Fuji shouted into the receiver. "Max, just…. Max, listen… Max!... MAXWELL!... Okay… I'm gonna get Yukiko and Toshiro to look for them, okay? All right, don't worry…We'll get them back… Okay, bye." She hung up the phone and looked over her shoulder at who remained of her group.

"What's wrong? We could hear Max from over here, Fuji," Ryo said with concern. "I know the boy can shout, but that was ridiculous!"

"His and Leo's kids never showed up at the hotel," Fuji seated herself at the table in the hotel and drummed her fingers against the oak. "That isn't like them…"

"Hey, maybe they went out for, I dunno, food or somethin'. You get distracted in this city a lot, trust me," Toshiro said with a small smile.

"Yeah, I noticed you getting 'distracted' by every girl in a tight pair of pants in this city!" Yukiko countered with a deep frown.

"Toshiro, you have a car, too, right? You and Yuki take that… Ryo-san, Ally and I'll meet up with Leo, Max and Heiji, and try to figure out just what the hell's going on."

"I'm scared for those kids… It's never a good thing when anyone around here goes missing," Ally muttered gravely.

"We're on it…. But where the hell do we start?" asked Yukiko, kicking her feet up and standing beside Toshiro.

"Ask around the airport, see if any of the attendants saw them. Then if that's a dead end, they have cameras for security… Get the tape of today and we'll analyze it here."

"Right… Consider us gone," Toshiro picked up his swords, and Yukiko was quick to follow him out of the house.

2,000 feet above New York:

"Hrm," Odori glanced over her magazine and looked to her daughter, who was asleep in her seat. Next to her sat Jordan, who was also in the middle over reading, although Odori could not make out the title of the book. He glanced over his glances at the seat in front of him, and then looked over to Odori.

"You okay?"

"Fine… I just have a bad feeling," Odori replied. "Where's our first layover?"

"Spain. Let's hope you're not as psychic as your dad, eh?" he said with a hopeful chuckle. This laughter faded, however, when he read over Odori's expression. "You're really worried about something, aren't you?"

Odori gave a nod, and glanced down at Namiko, "Maternal instinct, I suppose…"

"Don't worry, Fuji only acts stupid. You ought to know that by now," Jordan continued reassuringly. "She knows how to get herself out of trouble. She had to learn after Ari went AWOL."

"Why did you not come to help Lupin and Fujiko after that occurred?"

"I was still angry at him… We were angry at one another for a long time," Jordan sighed. "Hell, I thought he was a trainer, at first, someone to help me become a great thief. I didn't know that my dad had taught me to be a thief. I didn't even have a clue he was Japanese!.. Sure explained the love for sushi, though."

Odori gave a small laugh and said, "I did not know my biological family for some time, either. Heiji actually found them for me."

"So, is your sister… The one I met… Is she—"

"We're twins, yes. I suppose you can tell that we took different paths in life, though."

"So, why did they only give up one of you?"

"To many peasants, twins are still bad luck."

"With Ari and Fuji, I can see where they'd have evidence of that…"

"They needed to rid themselves of bad luck, and they needed the money, as well… And my mother and father paid greatly for me," Odori heaved a heavy sigh. "I think it rounded out to about ten-thousand yen…"

"…That's only like a thousand American!"

"When you're in poverty, it's a fortune."

"Eh, can't argue with that one… I wasn't the most well-off," Jordan allowed the now-awake Namiko to take hold of his hand as he spoke to Odori. "My parents were killed off when I was pretty young."

"Do I know who the murderer is?"

"Yeah, try my Uncle Remy."

"…That could explain why you hate Victor so much."

"Nah, he's a jerk in his own right. He acts too much like his father sometimes, though," Jordan said darkly. "I think Yukiko's sister is just setting herself up for a fall."

"She looks like her sister, so I'm sure you'll be there when she does," Odori said quietly.

"Yeah, I—What? Um, no… I don't do crazy anymore. I swore off crazy after my last relationship!"

Odori glanced over at him with amusement, "And I swore off another relationship, period."

"Hey, don't sell yourself short. You've got a lot to offer. You'll make some guy really happy."

"I'm through with trying to make others happy. And if my daughter is happy, then I am happy," Odori said sternly.

"Yeesh, you _are_ scarily like Goemon…"

A New York airport:

"You see anything?" Toshiro asked Yukiko through his cell phone.

"Nope, you?" Yukiko pushed the door of a restaurant in the airport and walked out into the busy terminal, looking about left and right for the small children.

"You know, I can't wait until the Christmas special, when the worst thing that happens is someone gets drunk…"

"Yeah, yeah. I know, buddy. Come on, I don't see crap… I need to get off my drink for a little bit," Yukiko rubbed her lower back as she spoke, and caught a glimpse of her ever-bulging reflection in a revolving door. She gave a small sigh and continued on, until she found Toshiro outside of the airport.

"Kids like that just don't vanish," Toshiro said with a shake of the head. "There has to be video footage of them leaving…"

"Like outside the airport?" Yukiko's vision fell upon a camera staring back at them.

"Like exactly that," Toshiro smiled, picked up a long suitcase with his swords that he carried at his side, and began to walk back into the airport. "Get the car warmed, hon…"

"I can't drive," Yukiko tossed him the keys and strode toward the front doors. "I'll be right out, don't miss me."

"Why do I… Nevermind," Toshiro muttered and shook his head, and walked off in the direction of their vehicle.

Later, at the hotel:

"You run off the tag number yet, Heiji-chan?" Fuji leaned over Heiji and studied the information of the screen while Heiji gave a small nod and sipped from his cup of Ramen.

"Yeah, it's registered in Jersey… And it went missing a week ago," Heiji said with a sigh. "There's no kind of tracking device on it, so we've got another dead end."

"Hrm… Maybe not," Fuji narrowed her eyes and leaned in closer to the screen. "I see my niece and nephew… Can you zoom in on the driver?"

"Yeah," Heiji gave a nod and clicked away on the computer, closing in closer to the cab driver. "Nothing… It's too dark, Fuji."

"Wait, what about the rearview?"

"Hrm… Let me see…"

"Guys, I ain't gettin' nothing," Ally sighed and walked into the hotel room. "Carmen isn't picking up, her mom isn't… It's like the whole country's phone service is down!"

"Oh, yeah, you're worrying about your piece of ass and my kids are missing," Max said, looking up from one of the many files he and Leo were searching through.

"You wanna repeat that?" Ally growled.

"Guys, quiet," Heiji murmured. "I think… Here… I got his eyes… Fuji, you recognize him?"

"Ooowwww…." Fuji moaned.

"I think we have our answer," Heiji said, turning back to the other men in the room.

"Hey, Fuji, Victor went to his sources and you'll never guess who's behind that counterfeiting!" Ryo cried, running toward her friend.

"Could it be… Jurgis?"

"Yeah, how'd you know?"

"Because he's right here, too," Fuji said, pointing to the cab driver on the screen.

"WHAT?" Max shrieked.

"Yeow… Leo, calm down your boyfriend…" Fuji murmured. "I'm willing to bet this has something to do with why you can't contact Cagliostro, Ally…."

"They've still got some of the best forgers in the country. A lot of people from Dad's generation made a living making fakes and exporting them out of the country, so of course they'd jump for new work," Leo continued, closing a file and looking over his glasses at his sister.

"Urm… Yeah…." Fuji blinked a few times, and then shot her head back to Ryo. "Get in touch with Yukiko and Toshiro, tell them we need a flight to Cagliostro, or at least Italy. Heiji, call Jordan and Odori, we may need them, there, too, if this thing's as huge as I'm thinking it is."

"We'll take care of the flight," Leo said, rising from his seat.

"Wait, we can?" a confused Max inquired.

"But you have to trust us, Fuji," Leo continued, taking out a step of handcuffs.

"Leo, what are you doing?" Max hissed in a whisper.

Leo turned about and put a finger to Max's mouth, "Leave this to the taller people. You just sit there and go through your files, okay? You look so pretty when you do that."

Max was too stunned by this to counter, and Leo continued, "Have us pretend to arrest you, we'll get you out of the country quick that way."

"No, that won't work! I'm the Paris Hilton of the crime world, no way'll that NOT get any press!" Fuji snapped, briefly eyeing the handcuffs.

"I don't hear you coming up with anything better," Leo muttered, turning back to his files. "Or is the partying getting to your brain."

"A word, with you," Max said through gritted teeth, pulling Leo out by the shirt collar onto the balcony. He quietly closed the balcony door, and all in the room could see the gestures and motions of anger Max made toward his partner.

"….Maybe we should close the blind; I feel wrong watching this," Heiji muttered as they all continued to watch Max scream at Leo.

"You know the saying, right? The more screaming, the better the makeup sex," Fuji said with a chuckle.

"You know, maybe Leo isn't all that wrong about you," said Ryo wearily.

Max opened the door as slowly as he had before while trying to regain his breath from the shouting, and calmly walked into the hotel, Leo following with his hands in his pockets.

Max seated himself on the couch, crossed his legs, and looked upward at Fuji, while Leo walked past all of them and out the door.

"Hey… Um… How'd it go?" Fuji asked nervously.

"Screw him, let's just find those kids," Max answered darkly.

"…Max?" Fuji muttered.

"Listen, he's not happy, so he wants me to move out after this, so that's fine!" Max shouted. "If that's the way he wants to be, then he can be like that! I have no damn problem with a divorce! ….Let's just find those kids…" he said in a weak voice.

Cagliostro:

"Oww…" Jared sat up and rubbed his head. "Dako? Dako, are you here?"

"She's still asleep," said a blonde with a sweet voice. "Are you all right? What's your name?"

"It's Jared… Jared Lupin…. Aw, no, I'm not supposed to tell my last name! I think this is the only family with rules like this," Jared muttered.

"That's all right, I'm friends with the Lupin family. My name is Carmen."

"Hi…. You know my family?"

"Well, we were almost related, in a way. We were nearly cousins," Carmen chuckled.

"Ew… Oh, no offense, but, it seems like my family gets more and more huge all of the time. Where's Dako?"

"Your sister?"

"She's my dad's daughter… We're kinda siblings, but… It's a long story. She's okay, right?"

"Yes," Carmen nodded and rose. "Physically, at least."

"Huh?"

"We're all prisoners here… Myself, my mother, and now I suppose you and your sister, as well," Carmen said in a low voice. "I've tried several escape methods, but nothing seems to work. A ruthless man's taken over, and shut us from the outside world."

"What, and no one noticed?"

"We're too small for that," Carmen sighed. "The last news-making event was my running away, and before that there was a messy ordeal in the late 70's. But people usually let us keep to ourselves, other than that."

Jared nodded and hopped off of the bed in the large room and looked about at his surroundings, and then looked over his shoulder at her. "Wait… Carmen… You're Ally's girlfriend!"

"….I suppose so," Carmen said quietly, and looked over to another bed in the room where Dako slept with Clarisse at her bedside.

"She looks like a thief who worked for Lupin for some time," Clarisse said with a small smile. "Probably no relation; she looks too sweet to be a thief."

"Hey, she's better than me, and I'm a ninja!" said Jared with a laugh.

"You're not that good yet," Dako muttered and opened her eyes.

"You're awake! All right!" said Jared with a smile. "Are you feeling okay?"

"Eh…. Where are we?" Dako muttered, sitting up on the bed and looking about at the tiny crowd that surrounded her.

"Cagliostro," said Jared, placing a hand on her arm. "It's a long story, but I think that cab driver's got something to do with it."

"That cab driver?" Dako repeated, and rubbed her forehead. She looked to Clarisse, who only gave a small shrug.

"I'm as puzzled as you are," she admitted with a small sigh. She looked over to the other side of the room, and glanced at Carmen, who was in front of the dresser. "…Dear, what are you doing?"

"I think it will make itself clear in time," Carmen replied. "Mother, I want you to stay with them. I know that you can protect them, and vice versa."

"Wait," Clarisse rose and stepped over to her daughter. "What does that mean? Carmen, what are you doing?"

"You live with a thief long enough, you learn a few tricks," Carmen said while opening a dresser drawer and pulling out a pair of slacks.

Tokyo:

"This is a nice place," Jordan admitted as he looked about at the décor of the Japanese inn.

"My usual room, please," Odori said to the clerk at the desk. The old woman nodded, glanced back at Jordan briefly, and gave a small smile. She gave a small chuckle and murmured something to Odori, then disappeared into the innards of the inn.

"Does she realize that I understood that she said I have a nice ass?" Jordan asked, looking up from the giggling Namiko.

"Probably not," Odori answered. "She was like this when I was—"

"Hrm?"

"When I was here with Namiko's father," Odori said hesitantly. "…I have a usual room. I'll just head up there. She's just getting out a couple of mats for us, but she will bring them up."

"Mats? Eh…" Jordan gave a small shudder at the thought of sleeping on the floor, but followed Odori up the stairs to a room at the end of the hall. "Wow, nice taste… Looks just like the pictures in tourist guides."

"You've never been to Japan?"

"Eh, I come here a lot, but mainly for business. I never stay long enough to really take in the sights."

"I see. Well, I will get to unpacking. Could you watch Namiko for me while I take care of a few things?"

"I don't see why not. She's the first girl in a long time who I could actually stand," Jordan said with a chuckle, and watched Odori slide open an adjoining door and disappear behind it. Jordan then looked down at the young girl at gave a small smirk. "I'm glad your dad gave you back, don't get me wrong… I just don't see how he did it. Hrm? Who the hell's calling me right now?" he wondered out loud. "Hello? Fuji? Hey… What? No, I'm—What the hell… Damn it, no, nothing like that! Fine! Bye!"

"Something the matter?" Odori asked from the other side of the paper door.

"Nothing," Jordan replied, placing his cell phone back in his jean pocket and turning to face the door. Odori opened it once more and stepped out, now in a more comfortable kimono, and with several of her bags lying open upon the floor. "Well, no, that'd be a lie. My niece and nephew are missing, and Fuji and her gang are headed to Cagliostro."

"Do they want us to come?"

"She says there's no rush, that's she's got it under control, but she scares me when she talks like that. That usually means she doesn't have a clue as to what the hell she's going to do," Jordan seated himself on the floor at a low table and rested an elbow upon it. "So I say we take the next flight out."

"Agreed," Odori nodded and seated herself across from Jordan. Her eyes then widened toward an open window, and Jordan grew outwardly concerned.

"What, is it ninjas?" he murmured.

"No, snow… A lot of it," Odori answered, blinking once more at the rapidly falling white.

New York:

"Wha…" Fuji began as Max seated himself next to her.

"Don't ask," Max responded, staring straight ahead at the seat in front of him. "It's a long story."

"…Zenigata, what's going on with you two?"

"I don't know, okay! Just… Just shut up, all right?" Max said in a low voice. Fuji frowned, took him by the hand, and pulled him out of his seat and down the hall, all the way into the bathroom, much to the shock and confusion of the other passengers on the plane.

"What are you doing!" Max growled.

"Relax, they'll just think we're in the middle of something else. They won't know I'm giving you a heart-to-heart, so don't worry about ruining your macho image. Now what's going on with you and my brother, huh?"

"I don't even know," Max admitted, looking downward at the ground after perching himself on the sink of the small bathroom. "It's like… He got this head injury and he's totally changed… I'm starting to think it wasn't for the better…."

"Just one? I've fallen on my head plenty of times, and I'm fine!"

Max said nothing, but he and his sister-in-law shared a brief glance, and Fuji's confident smile fell.

"Okay, so, maybe it affected him a little differently… There's got to be a reason for it, though!" Fuji declared, "Jeeze, it's always before the holidays this stuff happens… Come on, now, Zenigata, smile. C'mon…. Don't make me make you!"

"Lupin, I'm not in the mood…"

"Come on, Zenigata," Fuji placed her hands on his shoulders and smiled. "I'll take care of it. Now smile or Cecilia gets your guys' new home address."

"There," said Max with an obviously forced smile. "Happy?"

"Never," Fuji answered. She blinked a few times in puzzlement as Max placed his hands about her waist and embraced her. "Umm…. Max? Are we, like…. Having a moment?"

"I just really don't want him to leave me!" Max choked, proving that he could be as emotional as his father without even trying.

"Eh, it's all right… There… There…" Fuji said uncomfortably. Both heard a clicking and turned to see the door open and a stunned looking businessman in their midst.

"S-sorry… I didn't know I was interrupting anything," he said, red-faced, slamming the door shut. Max and Fuji looked to one another for a few moments, and then both broke out into a small laughter.

Cagliostro:

"Just because you trained a little while doesn't make you a pro!" Dako said in a hiss to Jared. "You can't even ride a bike!"

"I learned enough. More than you probably ever did," Jared replied, tugging upon the bed sheets and then peering over to balcony.

"You two may remain and guard my mother," Carmen said as she adjusted her black wig. "How he manages to see with a hairstyle like this…"

"I'd prefer none of you going," Clarisse admitted as she looked over at the children worriedly and then panned her vision over to her daughter.

"I have to do this. Someone has to get help," Carmen kissed her mother briefly, then stepped over to Dako and Jared. She embraced Dako briefly and kissed Jared on the side of the face, and began a slow descent down the balcony.

"Ha ha… You like her," said Dako, poking Jared.

"I do not!" Jared responded with a blush. "And I had someone kiss me—More than you've ever gotten, I'll bet!"

"Hrm…"

"Be careful," Clarisse whispered as she stepped over to the balcony and watched Carmen, dressed in disguise as Ally, let go of her grip on the makeshift rope and landed upon the roof of a lower level. She then paused, pulled another bedsheet rope from her side, and continued down, until she was out of sight. She was visible moments later, swimming across the mote and then hiding in a nearby bush. She then broke into a run as she made sure the coast was clear, and disappeared out of visual range.

Tokyo:

"I can't believe this…" Jordan muttered and closed his cell phone. "Looks like we're trapped for the time being. All of the airports in the area are shut down because of the damn snow."

"At least I brought provisions," Odori said with an attempt at optimism as she began to set to table. "I fed Namiko already… She's asleep in the other room."

"Thanks… I just don't know how this could get any worse," Jordan said with a heaved sigh. The lights then flickered, and decided to shut themselves off. "….Downed power line…."

"I wonder which ancestors I've dishonored now," Odori murmured as she looked about and rose. "Go get candles, I will go get Nami. I do not want her getting cold…"

"Yeah, good idea," he nodded in agreement and walked to the low table while Odori exited the room, returning with Namiko and herself wrapped in a thick blanket.

She seated herself across from Jordan, and smiled as her daughter reached out and picked up a small handful of seaweed crackers from a bowl Odori had laid out. "You're going to make yourself sick…. Well, fine…. But do not get ill during Christmas, Namiko Ishikawa-Miyamoto."

"Kept her father's name, huh?"

"He's to have some involvement in her life; she just could not stand being away from me."

"Hey, I don't blame her, you're pretty nice for an Ishikawa," Jordan lit a few candles he had found in Odori's luggage. Her girl-scout like ingenuity had paid off once again, it seemed.

"I suppose I should thank you for that comment."

"Hey, it's no problem. It's the truth. Your one brother's a creepy computer nerd, and the other's a creepy Broadway dancer. You're the most like Goemon… And I didn't think I'd ever say that and mean it in a good way."

"My father could be a little rash…."

"He tried to train me and I ended up with a concussion."

"Train you?" Odori said with narrowed eyes. "How long ago was this?"

"Had to be about anywhere from fifteen to… Twenty years."

"I was just a small child, then," Odori leaned forward and sipped her tea, and glanced at Jordan's stunned expression.

"I remember you… You tried to stab me right in the ass with this little sword!" Jordan said with a laugh. "You tore my favorite pair of jeans!"

"I'll reimburse you for them, then."

"Nah, it's okay. Just buy Namiko something, and we'll call it even," Jordan answered, sipping his tea and then looking out at the snow. "I just hope they're faring better in Cagliostro…"

"A place like that? I would doubt it…"

"You really know how to bring sunshine into a room," Jordan said with a chuckle, and rose as he heard a crunching noise from the outside. Odori heard this as well, and slowly rose to her feet with her daughter on her hip.

"You hear what I hear?" Jordan muttered.

"I'm an Ishikawa—Always," Odori smiled and in one swooping motion retrieved a long length of rope and placed Namiko on her back in moments the little girl was strapped on to the back, and Odori had her sword in hand, and Jordan his gun.

A strong wind blew out the candles, the only light in the room, and a series of swooshes could be heard streaking into the room and surrounding the two. Odori met back-to-back with Jordan, and Lupin shakily held up a lighter and lit, revealing the black masked-ninja liked figures associated with the guards of Cagliostro. One motioned forward, and the others went to attack, Odori and Jordan drew both of their respective weapons and began to fight as they had been taught by their fathers.

"What'd they say?" Odori shouted to Jordan as one attacker called to the others in English.

"'Get the baby!'" Jordan responded, and turned to Odori. "Run! Start up my car!" he called in Japanese, and tossed her his keys. She nodded, hopped off of the small table she had been cornered on and briefly flew over the ninja-like fighters, and ran through the open window and out to the front. She cursed as she saw Jordan's car totaled, and stopped the first motorist she could find; a man driving a Honda down the dark road.

"Get out!" Odori ordered the young Japanese man.

"What the hell? Are you crazy, bitch? Do you have any idea how expensive this is?" the man laughed.

Odori, who was indeed not laughing, drew her sword and placed the tip an inch from his nose, "….Get out…."

"D-damn… Yes ma'am," he muttered and slid out. Odori pulled Namiko from her back and placed her on the passenger seat, quickly buckling her up and accidentally reversing.

"I HATE stick!" Odori growled as she grinded the gears and put the car into drive.

"Momma! Ningoh (dolly)!" Namiko moaned. "Ningoh!"

"Damn it…" Odori rolled her eyes and fishtailed the car and then drove to the back of the inn, where Jordan was outside defending himself from one of the fighters.

"Grab her doll!" Odori shouted.

"WHAT?" Jordan shrieked.

"Do it!" Odori demanded, and Jordan with a disbelieving expression ran into the back of the room and then through the open sliding door, and landed right on the hood of the stolen Honda. "I hope he doesn't plan on getting his car back…" Odori muttered while Jordan climbed into the car beside Namiko.

"Ningoh!" Namiko gasped and clutched onto her doll.

"Take a left up here," Jordan said to Odori, pointing to the road ahead.

"What? Where?" Odori frowned and narrowed her eyes in order to turn exactly where Jordan had motioned.

"WOAH! Damn it! Wrong side of the road!" Jordan shrieked and pulled the wheel to the correct side of the road right before a head-on collision with a semi truck. "Where'd you learn to drive!"

"I didn't."

"What!"

"I don't know how to drive…"

"Christ…" Jordan placed a hand over his eyes and slunk down in his seat, praying to make it out alive.

Cagliostro:

"What do you mean I can't get in?" Ally growled. "I'm her fiancé, damn it!"

"Sorry, no trespassers allowed," said the tall guard, glaring down at the relatively short Ally.

"Al, c'mon, man. We'll figure out something," Heiji placed a hand on Ally's shoulder, but Ally only brushed him off and went to punch the guard. He ended up with a gun pointed squarely at his head. Ally narrowed his eyes as he was slowly turned around by Fuji and she placed an arm over his shoulders as they walked from the gates. Unbeknownst to them, Carmen was merely a few meters away in a bush, and caught sight of Fuji delivering this affection gesture to Ally. She bit her lip and looked down at the ground, but remained in silence until they had walked away from the castle gates.

"We'll think of something, trust me. I know we will," Fuji whispered to him.

"Hrm…" Leo glanced at the guard once again, but did not share what Ryo knew he was concocting in his mind. Leo approached the guard, and spoke a few words to him, while Fuji looked on, stunned at the body language Leo was using. It was so much like… Their mother.

Max saw this, and looked in the other direction, and shut his eyes tightly as he heard the gates open up and heard them walk away from the post.

"Zenigata…." Fuji muttered and went from Ally to Max. "Oh, the boys are always getting hurt here." She sighed and rubbed Max's shoulders then kissed him on the forehead. "We'll everything straightened and I'll hit Leo in the head for you when everything's done. Does that sound good?"

"Yeah," said Max in a whisper.

"Hey, would you look at that!" Yukiko muttered and took a few steps forward.

"What's up, Yuki? Heiji stood beside her and looked in the same direction.

"Morse code!" Yukiko smirked and reached into Toshiro's gi.

"Excuse you!" Toshiro yelped.

"Please, you're usually begging for this," Yukiko smirked and pulled out a pen and pad of paper. "What's it say, Heiji?"

"H… E…. L… Help! Help… U…. Us! Help us! They're English speakers!" Heiji called back to the group.

"You think that could be your kids, Max?" Fuji inquired.

"Only if… If, well, Lupin taught…. Ohhhhh….." Max gave a moan as he realized exactly where Dako had learned to pick a lock like she had at the auction house. "….I'm gonna hate to see Leo when he's back to normal and someone tells him…."

"Let's head inside while Leo's got that guard distracted," Fuji began to push the group along and took up the lead, and was stunned when a hand reached out, grabbed onto her ankle and pulled her into a bush. "Ally? What… Aren't you…?"

"It's me," Carmen said quietly.

"Carmen! Woah, Ally really taught you good makeup skills! I can't even see your—"

"Come… Let's go," Carmen rose and pulled off the mask, staying out of the sight of Ally, who was already near the castle bridge.

"I'm glad you're okay!" Fuji said with a relieved laugh. "Are my niece and nephew in there?"

"Yes. And they are fine as well," said Carmen with a nod, "…Fuji?"

"Hrm?"

SMACK! Carmen hit Fuji across the face with all of her strength, which was a surprising amount, and shouted with tears in her eyes, "Stay away from him!" she cried, and ran forward to join the rest of the group.

"….Woah… I just… I got bitch slapped by Carmen," a stunned Fuji mumbled.

Inside the castle:

"Mr. Lupin… How nice of you to join me for dinner," said Jurgis with a smile as he rose from the long dining room table and pulled out a chair to his right. "Please, I would love for you to join me…"

"Thank you," said Leo with a slight nod of the head as seated himself beside Jurgis. "How did I figure that you'd show up again? It was enough having Victor as a recurring villain… Now you now."

"I guess I'm your Pycal," Jurgis said lightly as he seated himself once more and held up a plate. "Stroganoff?"

"I'm laying off of the red meats for now. Thanks, though," Leo smirked and watched Jurgis' hands as they went back to their own plate. "…Where are the kids, Jurgis?"

"Leonard Lupin… The man of a one-tract mind and numerous languages… Mankii-chan, too. Congratulations on that, they're calling you the next Yasuo Yamada, from what I hear… Minus the Clint Eastwood voiceover work. Are they planning on having you do any live action voice work?"

"There's talk of my doing a few things, but that doesn't matter," Leo leaned inward and clasped his hands together. "What matters now is you and me, and the fact that you have my children."

"What will you do if I don't give them to you? Shoot me?"

"Wouldn't be the first time," Leo replied with a smile. "I don't know what's happened to me, but I feel like I could shoot you right now and go get a burger afterwards…"

"So you like those drugs, eh?" Jurgis smiled and sipped his tea. "They were supposed to make you lose your mind… You're probably halfway gone already. The head injury's just a wonderful little coincidence."

"What'd you sneak it in, eh? Those stress pills?"

"No, your inhaler. We've been pumping you full of it for weeks… The signs take a little time to show, however," Jurgis gave a small chuckle and set down the small cup. "You should be committed in the state you're in right now."

"Why me? Fuji has an inhaler, too."

"You would've figured it out faster," Jurgis answered with a small shrug. "You wouldn't have gone into denial."

"You're clever… No wonder my father used to like you…. Why'd he can you, anyway, Jurgis?"

"He didn't like my dealings, and he thought I was too close to your sister."

"That makes two of us. Now hand over my kids, or they won't be able to distinguish your corpse from the rest of the ones that are in that torture chamber beneath the palace."

"Fine… You want to see them so badly, you can join them," Jurgis said with a growl. He rose from his seat, as did Leo, and both stared at one another a long while. Jurgis reached for a knife upon the table, as did Leo, and Jurgis in one move kicked up his chair in Leo's direction, sending Lupin flying until he landed upon a bed of coal next to a fire place. Jurgis lifted Leo up by the neck and drug him over to the fireplace. He tightened his grip and drug Leo over to the fireplace, placing his head inches from the flames.

"Yo! Jurgis!" Fuji shouted, and fired off a warning shot. Yukiko soon followed, shooting through the teacup he had been using and sending the porcelain flying in hundreds of separate directions.

"Now how did you get here?" Jurgis wondered aloud, standing to his full height and taking Leo with him.

"I'm a Lupin, and we always get what we want," Fuji said with a confident smile. "Clever trick… Sending out fakes of pieces people would pay high prices for… But that's not it, isn't it? What's the connection with Capran?"

"Do I look like some kind of comic book villain?" Jurgis said with a laugh. "You've got a tech guy, you figure it out!"

"That'll be a little more difficult when you're dead!" Yukiko shouted and raised up her gun. Toshiro shook his head, though, and placed a hand over hers. "What are you doing?" she whispered.

"You shouldn't even be here," Toshiro said with a frown. "I don't know why I… Why'd I let you come?"

"We'll settle this later," Yukiko shrugged off Toshiro and once again aimed at Jurgis, firing but missing him by only a few inches. "Damn it!"

"There's a saber over his head," Carmen whispered to Ally.

"Thanks, I—Carmen?" Ally yelped.

"Quick!" Carmen whispered.

"Yuki, aim for the mantle!" Ally ordered.

Fuji gave a nod as she saw what Ally had planned, and shouted over to Leo. "To your right! Your right! Yeah! Right there! Now, Yukiko!"

Yukiko shot, knocking the saber from its place over the fireplace, and the blade made contact with Jurgis' neck. Even Toshiro shuddered at the sight that followed, and Leo took a few steps back from the body. Ryo's blood ran cold as he turned around to face them; he was covered with blood as he had been when he had been thought to have been the murderer of that guard so many years ago.

"Everybody okay?" Fuji was quick to ask. "Leo? You all right? How about you, Carmen?"

"I'm fine," Carmen answered, quickly shielding her hand from sight. Ally took her hands and looked them over, and gave her a critical glance.

"How'd you make your knuckles bleed?" he asked while removing his jacket and placing it over her shoulders.

"She must've hurt it on her fall…" Fuji said quickly before Carmen could concoct an excuse. "There'll still guards under Jurgis' command. Carmen, you lead Ally, Leo and Max to where the kids are… The rest of us are gonna play guard. Except for you, Yukiko."

"What? That's crap!" Yukiko growled.

"Yuki-chan, you don't want to lose a baby. It hurts," Fuji said with gritted teeth. "Now get in the car."

"….Yeah…." Yukiko muttered and shoved her hands in her pockets. "Toshiro, come on…. You, too. I can't fight them off on my own."

Toshiro nodded and followed, turning back once to glance at Fuji and wonder what her statement of loss had been about.

The Ishikawa household:

"They're already packing," Odori murmured as she pulled Namiko's blanket about her tighter and looked in one of the windows to see one of her numerous siblings packing for their obligatory Christmas trip to Lupin's home.

"Well, as big a family as they are, they probably have to send their luggage a week in advance," Jordan killed the headlights and parked in front of the large traditional structure and walked up the stairs with Odori at his side.

"Someone's at the DOOR!" one of the young boys shouted.

"Amaya!" Goemon called.

"I'm helping Sanami pack—Goemon, you answer it," Amaya replied from upstairs. The aging samurai sighed and glanced through the peek hole, and nearly choked as he recognized the tall figure next to his daughter.

"No… Not him…" Goemon muttered numbly. "Not him…"

"Hello, Papa!" Odori smiled widely as Goemon opened the door, and embraced him tightly. "I'm sure you know…"

"Jordan Lupin."

"Mr. Ishikawa," Jordan nodded and gave a polite smile, although he was about as thrilled as Goemon at the aspect of sharing a roof.

"What brings you all here?"

"Cagliostro guards attacked us," Odori answered with a small sigh.

"Cagliostro?" Goemon's eyes widened, and Odori quickly placed a hand on her father's shoulder.

"It's under control; Jordan helped me keep them from Namiko."

"Jordan did? Wait, you two were sharing a room?" Goemon shot his head in Jordan's direction and wore that familiar look of a samurai ready for the kill.

"It isn't what it seems," Odori said with a blush. "We were wondering if we could stay over for the night."

"Certainly. There is a crib in your room, Odori," Goemon gave a nod and a small look of surprise as his daughter pecked him on the cheek and made her way up the stairs. Jordan went to follow, but Goemon quickly extended a hand, preventing him from furthering up the stairs. "I will lead you to your room."

"You know, I'm not the perv my dad is…"

"This is my house, so you will abide by my rules," Goemon answered. "And Odori is my daughter, so you—"

"She's not a little kid you know, right? She's… Got a kid."

"I realize this. I failed once, so I shall not again."

"Oii….." Jordan rolled his eyes and followed Goemon up the stairwell unhappily.


	32. We Need a Little Christmas

DISCLAIMER: Yeahhhhh…. I don't own _Lupin III,_ and I've eaten too damn much too think of something clever to write here.

Happy Holidays!

My most favoritist time of the year…. Anyone who's scanning through chapters and saw that wording has probably been automatically turned off by my butchering of the English language. But if you've been with me a while, like a lot of you have, then you're used to my grammatical errors. Happy holidays to all of my supporters who have become my friends over the years… People who've become like a second family to me in a sense. You and even those I don't talk to on a regular basis are the main reason that I keep doing what I do, and thank you all for giving me the support and guidance I need to improve in my talents. Thanks (In no special order) Kat, Katrina, Cora, Yuki, Lealah, Chas, Iowa, DJ, Rick, El Cid, Amani, Brey, Keywee, and all of you who have given me kind words and criticism over the years, no matter how hard it was for me to take! It only helped, trust me! Now, let's get on with the chapter and make 2006 bangin' year!

Fun Fact of Boredom: A little top ten list here…. Shocking things, based on reactions of my readers… Feel free to change it about any way you'd like: 10. Julia killed by Toshiro's mother, 9. Ari works for Interpol, 8. Sakura is found to still be alive, 7. Lupin's seventeen children, 6. Odori becomes pregnant, 5. Fujiko is pregnant with twins, 4. Carmen bitchslaps Fuji, 3. Max comes out of the closet, 2. Toshiro is found to be Goemon's son, 1. Yukiko is Jigen's daughter

Chapter Thirty-two: We Need a Little Christmas

France:

"Hey! Toshiro! Yukiko!" Lupin laughed heartily and embraced each of the Lupin gang members. "Glad you could make it! Heh heh… Yuki, you're getting big fast, huh? So you expecting a boy or a girl?"

"I'm not telling yet," Yukiko answered with a knowing smile, briefly glancing over at Toshiro.

"Ohhh I see…. Letting him sweat it out, eh?" Lupin placed a hand on Toshiro's shoulder and patted it. "Well, I hope it's a boy for Yukiko's sake, Toshiro, ehehe…. I'm not sure how she'd handle a girl…"

"I'd manage," Yukiko laughed and placed a hand on her stomach. "Yeow…. Heh, I think this one'll be a dancer, like its dad…."

"Yeah, well it's freezing right now… Come on it… Where're my kids?"

"Fuji's doing a few things, and I couldn't tell you where Ari was if my life depended on it," Toshiro shrugged and closed the door behind him.

"Well, I hope they show soon…. The snow's really picking up out there," said the thief worriedly.

Across town:

"Every year?" Heiji repeated.

"Every year," Fuji answered with a nod and a smile.

"Why don't you ever tell anyone?"

"Where's the fun in that? Besides, everyone would think I was some kind of softie… And I don't want anyone walking all over me," Fuji shrugged. "Now help me get this bag out of my trunk, will ya? The food'll get frozen…"

"Why do you let everyone think you're an egotistical slut?"

"Eh, everyone has their secrets," Fuji replied. "Like Billy Joel said, we all have a face that we like to hide away forever."

"…Please for the love of God don't quote Billy Joel again…." said Heiji with a frown. Fuji gave a long laugh and slapped him on the shoulder and stepped inside of the hospital with a bag slung over her shoulder.

"I believe you know where these go, Ma'am," Fuji said with a wink as she set down a large bag in front of the receptionist's desk and smiled widely. Heiji did the same, but with a more awkward smile.

"Are you sure you don't want to see them?" the receptionist asked.

"Hey, I'd rather have them believe that Santa brought the toys… Not me," Fuji waved her goodbyes, and was soon out of the hospital, back in her car and on her way to her father's.

"….Just when I think I've figured you out," a still unbelieving Heiji muttered, shaking his head.

"Ah, that's what makes me so interesting, Heiji-chan!" Fuji chortled and zoomed off toward the Lupin mansion.

On the outskirts of Paris:

"I'll get it!" Dako shouted, and ran to the front door. "Hey, he's here!"

"Great!" Jared ran down the stairs and waited by the foot as Dako opened the door, and Leo stepped in, looking tired from his long trip across the country.

"Hey there, Sweetie!" Leo immediately brightened as Dako embraced him, and he spun her about once. "Where's your Dad?"

"He's with Avery," Dako explained. "How are you feeling?"

"Better…. They're really helping me," Leo answered calmly as he followed the two children into the living room, where Max Zenigata sat with a yarmulke on his head and a baby in his lap. "….Hey…"

"Hey," Max nodded and watched as Leo sat down on the couch. He passed the baby off to Leo and looked offward, finally breaking the strong silence between them. "….How've they been treating you?"

"Pretty good… I miss your cooking," Leo said with a weak laugh. "Um, how are the kids holding up?"

"Upset…." Max leaned against the couch and gave a heavy sigh. "We all—"

"Yeah, I know… I miss you guys, too," Leo glanced at Avery and then at Max. "I've got another evaluation…. Does anyone—"

"The press thinks you're doing a translating gig in Taiwan, so you're fine," Max answered with a small smile. "No one knows you've in the mental institute…."

"Good. I wouldn't want that getting out and embarrassing my dad or anything," Leo said in a low tone, his eyes failing to make contact with Max's. "Listen, I need to talk with you for a little bit… About things…"

"Yeah, I gotcha, buddy," Max rose with Leo, and left Avery in the care of his siblings, and the two walked out onto the back porch.

"I'm so sorry," Leo said with a heavy sigh.

"Don't be… You were off your rocker…."

"No! It was wrong, and…. Damn it, I treated you like crap," Leo seated himself in one of the porch chairs and looked up at Max. "I think we both…. We both just need to handle this relationship a little differently, because I don't want to end it, either. Not with kids…"

Max nodded, and grasped onto Leo's hand, "….We still need to go to your parents'."

"I know," Leo pulled Max down and scooted over to him. "You look cute in your skullcap, heh…"

"Thanks," Max blinked, and ventured to ask. "Is… Is that your pills talking?"

"Nope. That's the good part," Leo answered with a smile and a nudge. "Come on, let's get inside, you're cold."

"I know how that can be fixed…."

"Remember the children… I'll make it your Christmas gift, okay?"

"HA! I'm a Jew! We have Hanukkah—Eight nights!"

"Oi vey," Leo moaned and rolled his eyes.

Lupin's house:

"Goemon…. And Jordan….. Huh…." Lupin drew back the curtains to the second story room and looked to Fujiko in confusion. His wife only shrugged and peered out the window, smiling at the sight of Jordan holding onto Namiko. "Hrm…. Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

"Yeah, and it's kinda creepy," Lupin shivered visibly at the thought of Jordan with Odori, and began to hop down the stairs, nearly running into Jigen along the way.

"Hey, watch it, Peter Pan!" Jigen shouted.

Lupin ignored this, and hurried to the front door, opening it just in time to come face-to-face with his samurai friend.

"Lupin," Goemon said with a polite nod.

"Hey! Goemon! I thought you'd guys never show!" Lupin led them into the house, grabbing Jordan and stopping him short before he was able to enter the house. "I'll get to you later… Any of my other ones showing?"

"Yeah… My 'gang'," Jordan said with a less than enthusiastic tone. "Peter called and asked me to go to midnight mass with him… Makes me want to choke him with his rosary…."

"Well, you can't blame the guy… We all have our loves, and his for some strange reason is dressing in a black coat and speaking in Latin. We've all got our hobbies."

"Yeah… But mine's normal," Jordan responded as he set his bag at his feet.

"Mourning over the loss of Yukiko… Yeah, that's a growing pastime, from what I've heard."

"I know I'm not the first heart she's broken."

"You don't act like it," Lupin lifted up Jordan's backpack and handed it back to him. "I'll show you up to your room, if you don't mind it."

"Thanks," Jordan nodded and followed his father up the flight of stairs, leaving Odori on the ground level with her family.

"What's going on with you two," Goemon asked.

"W-what? No-nothing!" a flushed Odori answered, stunned.

"Are you positive?"

"I have no time for men in my life," Odori replied.

"I didn't either… Well, not with men, and, um, you understand," Goemon tried his best to look dignified, but failed at this, and Odori passed him with a smile at the edges of her lips.

Meanwhile, Ally was outside of the house, in the backyard, practicing the speech he and his father had been going over. He nearly toppled over onto the snow when he felt a hand upon his back. He was almost expecting one of his sisters, so he was surprised to see Carmen standing in behind him, her hands clasped.

"I think we need to talk," she said in a quiet voice.

"Yeah…. Um…. We need to sit down, first,s" Ally cleared his throat and sat down on a stone bench. Carmen followed him in his motion, and seated herself beside him. "Er, well… Before you do anything, promise me you won't hit!"

"Oh, no, I won't… That was just in the spur of the moment."

"Well, you've got a hell of a right hook… You should see what you did to Fuji," Ally gave a nervous laugh and looked down at the ground, and Carmen's eyes also averted to the floor.

"Allen… If… If you don't want to get married, just tell me. I'll be fine with it," Carmen said in an obvious lie.

"No, Carmen, I do! More than anything! It's just a lot of stress on me. It's not fair to you."

"So, do you want to call everything off? I'll understand…"

"No, you won't," Ally shook his head and took her hands. "Give me until March. Okay? We'll do it in March. I promise."

"Allen, I—"

"I know I don't deserve your trust. But I'd like one more chance. I want to prove to you that I'm not a creep out to use you. I just… I just freak. And I don't mean it, but, it happens… This'll be my Christmas gift to you. No more running, on my honor."

"If you run again you toss out your hockey jerseys," Carmen said sternly.

"What?" Ally choked. "B-but those are like… Thousands of dollars worth of jerseys!"

"And I'm worth it…."

"You…. You've been talking with Fuji, haven't you?"

"Allen…"

"Fine, fine. Deal," Ally muttered grimly. "Jeeze, now I really am trapped into this, aren't I?"

"Mm-hm. I won't be forty and waiting on you," Carmen leaned forward and kissed him, and placed her arms about him. "Come on, now, I don't want you catching a cold."

"Hrm, shouldn't I be the one worrying about you?"

"You worry too much," Carmen kissed him gently and then rose. "Come on, I think I hear someone in the kitchen cooking."

"How can you tell?"

"The yelling," Carmen answered with a chuckle.

Later that night:

"Dad…. I can't," Max said quietly.

"You need to do it," Zenigata answered sternly. "Those kids deserve at least one parent home, full time!"

"What about Interpol?"

"You hate being a cop, and you think it's the worst thing that eve happened to you. Don't lie," Zenigata said firmly, and passed Max back his cigarette after taking a drag of it. The two sat side by side on the porch, on a swinging chair that Max rocked back and forth with one nervous foot while he looked out at the frozen lake.

"If I hadn't become a cop, I wouldn't have met Leo, and I wouldn't even have the kids," Max sighed and closed his eyes. "Dad, I…. I can't!"

"Why not?" asked Zenigata with a snap.

"Listen, as long as there's a Lupin—"

"—There'll be a Zenigata to chase him. I know," Zenigata rose from the swing and shoved his hands in his pockets. "You're lucky; I was retired by the time you were born, so I was always around. I was never there for your sister… And she hates me for it. Well, she did, but… It's all water under the bridge. Long story short, you need to be there for those kids, damn it….."

"Dad, what are you doing?" Max asked worriedly as Zenigata stormed into the house, past the women in the kitchen and into the living room, where Lupin stood with Avery on his shoulders.

"Hey, Zenigata, what's with the face? You're scarier than usual," Lupin said with his ever-present smile.

"Hrm," Zenigata looked unamused by this, and reached into Goemon's belt, where the samurai kept a short dagger still. Lupin grew obviously tense, as did Max, and Leo from his corner with his mother, began to rise out of his seat.

"Z-Zenigata…. Are you okay?" Lupin took a step back, and watched in shock as Zenigata eased down and held up the sword for Lupin to take.

"I want to bridge the gap," said Zenigata sternly as he looked upward at Lupin. "I know what I said about Zenigatas and the Lupins, but I want to recant that now. If that's what it takes to give those kids a stable homelife, then so be it."

"Wha…. Zenigata, did you have too much eggnog again?"

Zenigata gave a small smirk and slowly rose from the ground, "I'm officially giving up on the Lupin case."

"….Thank you?" Lupin responded with a raised eyebrow. "Erm, Natasha, you drive him home tonight."

"Dad, you don't have to do that!" Max shouted and stood beside his father. "I…. Since my family's no longer bound to chase Lupin, I guess I…. I guess I could resign."

"Woah, what? Ummm….. I know that he's your dad, but I'm the one you go home with at the end of the day, Max. Would you care to tell me what exactly you two were talking about?" Leo removed his reading glasses and looked to Zenigata, then to his confused father, and finally to Max.

"I'm resigning from the Lupin case in order to stay home and take care of my family," Max answered sternly.

"Um, wow… Max, are you sure?" Leo asked disbelievingly.

"You're a terrific translator and voice actor… Let's face it, the only other things I can do besides cook is throw a mean curve ball and play Monopoly for three days straight."

"He really can," Heiji whispered to Toshiro. "I was the one playing with him. He didn't win, but hey, A for effort."

"The second one isn't really a talent," Max shrugged and walked over to Leo. "Our kids need at least one parent home, and you…. Well, you're too much like your father to be domestic."

"I'll slap you if you compare me to my father again," Leo said jokingly.

"Just add that to my Christmas gift," Max said quietly with a wink and a look that made Leo flush.

"Okay, if there's going to be any Zenigata/Lupin makeout sessions, let me know so I can excuse myself ahead of time," Jigen announced from his corner, much to Ming's annoyance.

"What, Jigen, are you a homophobe?" Lupin placed a hand over Jigen's shoulders and smiled. "And I always thought you had one eye on me."

"Say WHAT?"

"Well, you have to admit, Ming does act a lot like me…."

"Eh heh heh, you're friggin' hysterical," Jigen pushed Lupin off his shoulders and rose. "If anyone, Goemon would be the gay one. He's the one who had that thing with that guy."

"He looked like a woman! It's common in kabuki for men to dress as women, and some are convincing!" Goemon shouted. "At least I've never crossdressed for a prolonged period of time!"

"…Jigen?" Ming turned to her husband, almost afraid to ask.

"It was a long time ago, Ming. Before I even knew you."

"You in makeup…. That's kinda hot," Ming said with a seductive smile.

"….I'm gonna go puke my lunch up in that corner," Ally, who was now in the house with Carmen beside him, stepped away from his parents, taking Carmen with him. He couldn't help but notice Carmen's expression, however. "….What?"

"Well, you look a great deal like your father, so I was just imagining," Carmen answered quietly.

"Ohhh no, not you, too!" Ally yelped.

"We did enough of that to him when he was little, Carmen," said Ryo with a smile. "I'll show you the pictures later."

"You do and I'll key your car, Ryo!" Ally growled warningly.

"Go shoot a squirrel," Ryo took Carmen's shoulder and led her away from her fiancé while waving off Jigen. "Come on, I think we've got some pictures here."

"Well, I guess that's what you could call a happy ending," Lupin said with an unsure laugh. He looked over his shoulder and noticed a solitary figure on his back porch, and he excused himself from Jigen's company and then joined his daughter out on the wooden deck.

"How's my favorite daughter with Fujiko?" asked Lupin with a smile. "Wow, what's with the stone face, Fuji?... Is it about Jurgis?"

"Part of it," Fuji admitted and leaned over the railing and looked out at the lake in front of her. "There are other things, too."

"What? Having some of the other kids come over for the holidays? Is it about Chris? Like I said…. His mom was a great friend and business associate of mine, and things got out of hand. I'm sure you know all about what that's like. Especially you and Ally."

"How'd you find out about that?"

"Well, Dako and Jared couldn't stop talking about how Carmen gave you a black eye. So I asked around and I did the math… Why didn't you ever tell me you had trouble with having kids?"

"I didn't think it was important."

"You know, one of my sisters had the same problem…. She eventually had one, though. I mean, my sister's gone now, but it's refreshing knowing that I've got a nephew other than Victor."

"I feel like everyone's growing apart."

"They're just growing up, Fuji. It happens," Lupin said with a shrug. "I couldn't exactly look down at Yukiko and say, 'Well, sorry, you don't fit our schedule…. You mind coming back in a few years?'. You can't run from love… Hell, I spent most of my life running to it. But Jigen thought he could, and look at him—All girls and Ally! Even his damn dog's a girl! And Zenigata thought he'd never get someone… I was kinda with him on that presumption, and then boom, Natasha, and then he's a new father five years before he's able to go on Social Security. It's not exactly what they had planned, but they're glad for it."

"….You know, I'll real impressed that you were able to recite that speech without your cards."

"You saw those, eh?" Lupin chuckled and placed a hand over her shoulders. "You ever think of following them, eh?"

"You want another grandkid? Isn't three enough for you?"

"Nah. As opposed to popular belief, three's not company."

Fuji let out a groan and placed her face in her hands, "Sometimes I think that if I didn't look so much like mom that I was adopted!"

"There are worse families to come from," Lupin said reassuringly. "You're not Max's sister, at least!"

"….Dad….. I'm his sister-in-law. That's almost as bad."

"Eh, when you're right, you're right, Fuji…. Don't freak out that people are starting to go into different directions, just accept it. If they leave, well, they'll come back when you need them the most."

"Yeah, but… Odori's probably going to join Jordan's gang and you have no idea how bad that pisses me off! Grrr….. You ever want to kill someone?"

"Fuji, why don't we get you eggnog? You're starting to stress almost as much as your brother does, and he drives me crazy enough!" Lupin led his daughter away from the railing and into the house, looking downward at her with a frown of concern.

Later that night:

"He won't come if you're awake, Dako!" Jared said with a snap.

"Grow up, he isn't even real!"

"Ojiisan said he was, so you know he's got to be! He never lies, especially to kids!" Jared sat up in bed and glanced over at Avery, who still wore bandages from his recent surgery. He then looked back at Dako and let his eyes fall to the floor.

"What's wrong with you? I just said that there was no Santa… You look like I killed your puppy."

"I'm just worrying about my mom," Jared said quietly. "This is the first Christmas we haven't been together, and, well… I'm just hoping she's okay, that's all!"

"Yeah, I wonder what my parents are doing for Christmas…. Up there," Dako said, pointing upward and meaning something that was located higher than the third story. "Hrm… Hey, get dressed."

"What? Why?"

"Well, we both want to see our parents, right?"

"Yeah, but I don't even know where she is!"

"No, stupid. Don't you think Ave would want to see his mom?"

"Yeah, I…. But Papa hates her, Dako."

"I guess…. But who wouldn't want to see their kid at Christmas? She only lives across the ocean in Britain."

"Britain? Dako, they'd KILL us!"

"It's not that far. We'll take a cab to the Chunnel station and go to London. I've got her address and everything! Her name's Cecilia Lockwood."

"Well, I…"

"Come on, Jared, don't be such a sissy."

"I'm not a sissy!" Jared snapped.

"Then prove it and get your pants on," Dako stuck out her tongue and rose from bed, and headed over to Avery's crib, and lifted the baby out. "You get dressed and get the money from my purse."

"W-where did you get this?" a stunned Jared yelped as he retrieved her wallet and pulled out a few hundreds.

"Grandpa's hugs are the best…. Mainly because it's close to his wallet."

"Oh dear God, that automatically makes you worse than Grandpa," a wide-eyed Jared said while reaching for his boots.

Downstairs:

"You know, it'd be nice…. Having a boy to carry on your name," Yukiko began. Toshiro looked up from the script tiredly and gave a sigh.

"Would you quit toying with me and tell me what it is? I'm going crazy here, Yuki," Toshiro said with a frown.

"Hrm…" Yukiko seated herself beside Toshiro and placed a hand on her stomach. "A boy would be nice, but you've always gotten along better with girls…"

"So it's…."

Yukiko glanced from above her fedora and smiled, and gave a slow nod. Toshiro placed a hand on her stomach and then embraced her tightly, and gave a laugh. "I guess we'll have to figure out a girl's name then, huh?"

"Yeah… And Yukigo isn't an option."

"Damn, you read my mind," Toshiro sat back across from her and clasped his hands. "A girl… Wow… Heh heh, guess this means I'll have to teach her how to be a girl."

"Fun-ny. Hey…. Do we have carolers?"

"It's two in the morning. Why in the hell would there be carolers out?"

"Damned if I know…" Yukiko rose from her seat in the living room and walked over to the window, and saw three figures in the snow. "Crap…. Lupin's grandkids."

"I'll go get them."

"Too late…. They already caught that bus! Crap!" Yukiko growled and ran for her coat. "We've gotta go get them! We can run down that bus!"

"Na-ah, this is my job. It's too cold for you."

"Goemon Toshiro Ishikawa, I am in the middle of a mood swing," Yukiko said sternly. "Do not make me do something to you I will probably regret later."

"Hey, guys, what's up? I know the yelling can't be because you're both drunk," said Lupin lightly as he walked down the stairs, dressed in a heavy bathrobe over his pajamas and matching slippers.

"Your grandkids just hitched a ride on a bus," Yukiko answered.

"WHAT?" Lupin choked, and ran up to the children's bedroom to see all three gone. He then ran to Leo and Max's room and shook his son awake. "Hey. Hey! The kids are gone!"

"Wha….?" Leo blinked a few times as he began to awake and sat up. "Dad? Are you… Okay?"

"I'm fine! The kids, though! They caught a bus and we don't know where they're heading!"

"Oh my God," Leo sat up in bed and began to dress. Lupin moved to wake up Max, but Leo quickly stopped him.

"I don't want to scare him. He drank too much tonight, and he's out of it," Leo explained as he finished buttoning his shirt. "He was even too drunk to—"

"I don't want to know," Lupin said with a shake of the head. "Pass me one of your shirts. I don't want to wake up Fujiko. She'll have both of our heads, and she's a damn light sleeper."

"Here," Leo tossed him a purple shirt, and Lupin stared at it a moment and then back at his son. "And I was going to saw he was too drunk to get his own shoes off, before you disrupted me."

"….Why didn't I see the signs?" Lupin muttered as he tossed his bathrobe and then nightshirt off and began to change.

"You ready?"

"Yeah, but how do you wear these shoes? They're actually comfortable," Lupin said with a small laugh as he pulled on a coat and greeted Toshiro and Yukiko downstairs.

"I'm going, and that's that. It's not like I'm going to get shot," Yukiko pulled her scarf tighter and grabbed the keys from Toshiro's hand.

"If you weren't carrying my daughter….." Toshiro muttered.

"Oh? What? You'd leave me?"

"Hell, no. I worked too hard to get you," Toshiro replied, and stepped out, keeping the door open for Lupin and Leo and then closing it.

"Any idea where they'd go?" Lupin asked.

"Not a clue…" Leo sighed and seated himself next to Toshiro in the front seat of the car. "You can drive these?"

"An SSK can't be much harder than a Vespa."

"Just don't kill me on Christmas. I want one thing in my life _not_ to end in irony," Lupin said from the back seat.

"We'll need some gas…" Toshiro announced as he tapped the gauge and then looked over his shoulder at Lupin.

"That's Fujiko for you. Spends all my money and can't even leave me with a quarter of a tank," Lupin murmured as he reached for his wallet and opened it, nearly choking at the sight of the empty billfold. "What the hell? I just put three hundred in here this morning! And I know it wasn't Fujiko… She's been too busy mingling."

"I'll cover, Dad," Leo gave a weak smile and pulled out his own wallet and retrieved a few Euros. "Hrm… That's weird."

"What is? Did someone rob you, too?"

"No. I had Cecilia's address in here," Leo murmured. "It's gone, now."

"Do you think Max found it?" Toshiro started up the car and headed toward the nearest gas station while Leo continued to look through his wallet.

"No way. I would've gotten a lot more shouting if that had been the case," Leo answered. "The only one who's been near my wallet is Dako, and that's when she asked me for a few bucks to get a gift for Max."

"….Dako," Lupin murmured and glanced down at his wallet and then straight ahead.

"Yukiko, call Heiji and give him the bus number. He'll be able to pull up the route and maybe we can catch them for there," Leo ordered.

"I can't," Yukiko replied. "Er, he and Fuji….. Yeah… They're having alone time for Christmas."

"Oi," Leo slapped his hand over his face and sighed. "I guess then… I don't know…. Crap!"

"Maybe…. That'd be crazy, though. And a lot of assumption on my part," Lupin said to himself.

"What are you thinking, Dad?"

"Well, that bus… What number was it, Yukiko?"

"It was…. 297 B," Yukiko said after a moment's thought.

"I use that bus when I want to go to the Chunnel."

"Wait, Dad…. You take the bus?"

"Hey, I may have a ton of cars, but I don't always want to drive," Lupin responded with a hint of annoyance in his voice. "I'm just saying… Cecilia's missing address and the kids taking the bus to Britain… It's adding up, wouldn't you think, Ari?"

"Yeah…. But why Cecilia? I mean…. Why? Her, of all people?"

"Someone care to fill us in?" Yukiko asked blandly.

"Ari, what'd you tell Dako about Cecilia? Hrm?" Lupin leaned forward and listened intently for his son's answer.

"Just that she was Avery's mom… But, Dad, Dako saw Cecilia at the trial! No way would she want to visit her!"

"It's our only real lead right now," Lupin said with a sigh.

"So Great Britain it is… Merry Christmas to one and all," Yukiko seated herself against the back of the leather seat and placed a hand on where the baby had kicked her.

Several hours later:

"Here we are…. Well, have fun, Leo," Yukiko said with a wave of the hand.

"What? Me?" Leo, who had gone in to a doze in the front seat, sprung up to total alertness, and looked back at his father.

"Listen, if there are any problems, I'll be backup," Lupin patted his son on the shoulder, and with a groan Leo stepped out of the car and walked up the stoop to Cecilia's front door. He knocked weakly and bit his lip as he awaited her inevitable answering of the door. She did come to the front door, and as she opened it Leo could see the three children in her living room.

"…..He looks pissed," Jared muttered.

"Hi, Papa," Dako gave a weak wave, and Cecilia spoke too quickly for Leo to work an answer in.

"They're safe. I was a little surprised to see them on my stoop, however. They're all yours?" Cecilia said with surprising civility.

"Ummm…. Yeah. That's Dako, and that's Jared. And you know Avery," Leo answered with a weak smile. "Well, you're looking good…. What have you been up to?"

"Trying to find work," Cecilia answered in her usual monotone British accent. "I had my badge taken away from me."

"Yeah…. I heard," Leo said quietly. "Thanks for looking after the kids. I hope they didn't…. That they didn't cause too much trouble."

"They were fine," Cecilia said as she led Leo into her home, closing the door behind him. Leo looked about and noticed not much had changed since the last time he had visited her home. "Would you care for a drink? I promise no poison."

"Nah, I've gotta get going," Leo gave a weak chuckle and lifted up Avery from Dako's arms. "Well, thanks again."

"Arséne, are you still with that blond—Er, Max?" Cecilia quickly cut herself off from her own curse as she saw the small children in her presence.

"Yeah. He's a good dad," Leo nodded and motioned for Dako and Jared to rise. "Grandpa's in the car… Dako, I think he wants to talk with you, especially."

"Ouch. You're so busted," Jared murmured to his step-sister before she stepped out of the house meekly and into the yellow car waiting out front.

"It's weird seeing you here with pants on," Cecilia said with a cool smile. Leo was caught off guard by this, and tried not to falter.

"Well, I would've come as I usually do, but it's a little cold out," Leo answered. "Cecilia, um… Thanks for watching the kids."

"It's fine. You're the one I hate…. Well, if I have to pick out any single person in your family that I hate it'd be Maxwell, but that's because he annoys me. Your children are smart. They must have inherited it from their mothers."

"We'll get going now. I'd be lying if I said it was nice seeing you again, but Merry Christmas," Leo adjusted Avery as the little boy went to bite him and made his way to the front door.

"Any time," Cecilia replied. "Merry Christmas to you, too, Arséne… And say the same to the baby. I don't know sign language."

Leo clung onto Avery tighter and said nothing more and walked out to his car.

"See? Like this," Dako repeated the maneuver on Lupin, and much to her grandfather's shock, when she pulled away from her embrace with him she held a handful of bills in her hand.

"Wow, that's…. Hey, Dako, your dad's here," Lupin whispered and hurriedly took back the money. Jared and Dako exchanged tense glances as Leo wordlessly stepped into their car, and after a moment, Jared spoke up.

"Listen… It was my idea. I thought it'd be cool for Avery to see his mom, because I don't get to see mine," Jared said much to Dako's astonishment.

"You scared the life out of me, you know that, right?" Leo said quietly. "I thought I'd lost all three of you."

"Ari, they had the best intent. Come on…. You were even worse as a kid!" Lupin said in his grandchildren's defense. "Now I called Max and explained the situation and I'll bet Zenigata's already peeled him from the roof!"

"Greatttt…. We finally hit a smooth patch in our relationship and it's gone to hell," Leo muttered and glanced at his kids. "You're all okay?"

"Yeah," Dako nodded quietly. "Ummm…. Papa, we're so sorry!"

"It's okay. You're fine, and that's all that counts," Leo replied as he rubbed his eyes tiredly.

"Yeesh, you're taking it better than I would!" Yukiko laughed. "Then again, I'll probably keep a tight grip on this kid."

"Yukiko Maria Jigen—You and Toshiro were just as bad, if not worse than these two," Lupin answered with a frown as he remembered the many exploits of the two when they had been children.

"What? You were like us?" Jared blinked a few times, and spied Toshiro's hand on the steering wheel, and the ring he wore upon it.

"Yeah, except you two haven't upgraded to stealing a car and taking it for a joyride yet," Lupin answered blandly.

"You knew about that?" Yukiko yelped. "What else do you know about?"

"About what you and Toshiro did in my library last Christmas," Lupin replied, and caused Toshiro to nearly run off of the road. Leo gave a chuckle, and Lupin looked over at his son, "Yeah, I had to replace the desk after that, but after having you and Max stay there a week, I scrubbed my friggin' hot tub five times on my hands and knees with a Brillo pad. I didn't even get the maids to do that…. I would've felt too guilty."

"Dad, do you have to talk about that?" Leo moaned and slunk in his seat.

"What _are_ they talking about?" Jared whispered to Dako.

"Eh, get Dad to tell you about it," Dako replied.

The Lupin Mansion:

"Dori?" Odori spun around and saw her mother in the doorway of her bedroom. "What are you doing? Everyone else is at breakfast."

"It's nothing," Odori cleared her throat and quickly slammed shut the drawer to the dresser in her room.

"Hrmm…." Amaya walked over to her daughter and opened the dresser drawer, then pulled out the bag of makeup. "I have the feeling you aren't taking up kabuki."

"It's nothing, Mother," Odori repeated. "I just…. Well, my sisters got it for me for Christmas and I couldn't go being rude, now could I?"

"….You, and a Lupin. I would have never guessed."

"It isn't like that! You're not even close. He is just a friend of mine."

"Good, because his girlfriend just arrived."

"What?" Odori shouted and ran for the door, only to be held back by Amaya.

"I'm just joking… And if you're trying to impress it certainly won't work if you're in a gi. Every good samurai knows that different battles require different styles of armor," Amaya opened the closet in the room, which contained several of Odori's outfits. Fuji and her gang often stayed at her father's for long periods of time, especially during the summer, so Odori had left many things behind as a result of this. "Here, this will work."

"I wore this to a wedding two years ago."

"I didn't take you as fashion conscious," Amaya smirked. "Put that on and pull your hair up, and you'll be a surefire hit." Odori nodded silently, and Amaya left her daughter alone, humming to herself as she closed the door behind her. Odori waited until she had gone to step out in the purple and red kimono, and thought for sure the coast was clear… She cringed as she heard a distinct whistle from Heiji, who was just down the hall.

"Who's halls are you planning on decking?" Heiji asked with a light chuckle.

"Why don't you go play your over-expensive game system?" Odori snapped in return.

"Hey, Dori…. If he breaks your heart, I'll take care of him for you. I mean that."

"It won't be necessary…. I am already numb from the last heartbreak," Odori murmured to herself as she walked down the hall, recalling her mother's words in her mind.

She found Jordan playing with Jigen's youngest daughters as well as her own in the living room, and noted curiously Max in a corner of the room with his parents beside him while he breathed in and out of a paper bag.

"I need to speak with you about some techniques I was drawing up," Odori announced to Jordan after she had gotten his attention.

Jordan paused and looked her over a few moments, and nodded, leaving the small children with Ally and Carmen.

"How many do you want, Allen?" Carmen asked quietly.

"Hey, you're the one going through the labor… You pick. Although, I have the feeling you have an idea in your head how many. How many were you thinking? Two? Three?" Ally asked calmly.

"Oh, more like five or six," Carmen shrugged, and watched the color quickly drain from Ally's face. "What?"

Odori gave an amused chuckle at the sight of the two, and then turned her attention back to Jordan, who had quickly become sidetracked talking with one of his brothers over a gameplan.

"What'd you need?" he asked as he parted from Gabe, who was still looking over the floorplan with the same confusion as one witnessing a lobster tap dancing in a party gown.

"I wanted to go over some things with you, hopefully you'd consider some things," Odori answered with her best stoic samurai expression. "My daughter really enjoys your company, you know."

"Yeah, she's a sweetheart," Jordan shoved his hands in his pockets and followed Odori out to the backyard of the property.

"Yes. I was wondering… She needs a positive male role model around, so—"

"You want me to take her off your hands every once in a while? Not a problem, I like kids… Kind of wish every once in a while that I'd had a few by now, but hey, I'm busy as it is. It wouldn't be fair on kids or a wife."

"I suppose. Well, I… How to go about saying this?"

"Dori, I don't mind watching after her at all."

"It isn't that! Well, I…." Odori heaved a sigh and bowed her head. "I was wondering if you'd consider staying with us…. Erm, we me as well."

"Huh? Wait a second, are you—"

"Hey, Dori-chan!" Fuji came up from behind Odori and gripped her about the neck. "You're looking cuter than usual! Well, do I have news for you!"

"You're dying?" Odori asked blandly.

"Well, er, no…"

"Then I see no reason for you to bother me," Odori shrugged off Fuji's hand and tried to transcend her thoughts of causing physical harm to Fuji Lupin and enjoying it.

"I'm gonna be your inlaw!" Fuji said with a cheer.

"Pardon?" Odori asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Uh-huh! Sorry to ruin the surprise for you… He was going to ask later, but I found the ring in his coat pocket. What a rock!" Fuji continued with a happy crow.

"So you…" Odori blinked at the equally surprised Jordan, and flushed. "Well, I suppose I'll have to tell my parents. This news will overjoy them, as it does me."

"Jeeze, I never thought she'd be so happy to see me getting married," Fuji muttered as she watched Odori hurry off, a smile on her face.

"I could kill you right now and not feel any remorse," Jordan said with a glare to Fuji.

"….What?" a confused Fuji was left in the backyard, wondering exactly what had just happened.

"Dori, wait, this is a misunderstanding!" Jordan called and rushed back before she could get to any family member, but he was already too late. Goemon was in the living room beside the Christmas tree, with a serene look upon his face.

"I heard," Goemon said after a pause. "And I am glad you managed to mend her heart so quickly, especially after her incident with Musashi. She was never the same after that, and I thought that no one would ever make her happy again. So I thank you and I would be honored to have you marry into my family."

"Marry?" Fuji laughed from the doorway. "You mean, him? Goemon, I—"

"Stop talking, stop talking!" Jordan hissed and placed a hand over her mouth. "You ever think the world's a better place when there aren't words coming from your mouth?"

"I'll have to inform my relatives," Goemon rose and picked up the sword at his side. "Odori is already on the phone with her biological parents in Korea. I haven't seen her this happy since she met Jet Li in person."

"….I'm sunk," Jordan muttered numbly. "I'm a dead man…."

"Crap, have fun trying not to have him kill you when he finds out it was all a mistake… If Odori doesn't get to you first," Fuji scratched the back of her head and walked out of the living room, whistling to herself.

"Hey! Married man!" Gabe laughed and patted Jordan on the shoulder. "Guess this means we're going to have to arrange you a bachelor party!"

"You can start by shooting me," Jordan muttered.

Later that night, the countryside:

"They're going to kill us," Ryo whispered. "It's bad enough that my dad had to go to England today, but if he finds out you'll be dragging him into rural France on Christmas day!"

"Christmas is almost over," Victor reminded her, and pulled up to the old stone building. "This is the best gift I could have thought of giving you…."

"I know, but…. My dad's going to have my head," Ryo said in a quiet tone and allowed Victor to help her out of the car and up the stairs of the church.

"It isn't about what makes him happy… It's about what makes you happy. And I didn't fly in one hour ago from Morocco to postpone," Victor kissed her lightly and opened the door for her.

"I'm saying we go in for a sneak attack," Jigen muttered from the car at an abandoned tackle shop a few hundred yards away from the village church.

Lupin set down his binoculars and looked over to Jigen with a smile, "Hey, don't be so down! The girl's happy… Dori's happy, Ryo's happy… Everybody's happy. Even Goemon's got a smile on! This is one of the better Christmases I can remember."

"Heh, yeah… Everyone's having a blast…. Which leads me to believe that you haven't told them a damn thing yet."

"That they're on a hit list? Nah, I thought not. I'll sit them down later…. After this," Lupin sat back and tossed the binoculars aside. "I want to know that they're all happy and safe, even if it's for only a day. It's the best gift I think anyone could ever give those kids."


	33. Here's that Rainy Day

DISCLAIMER: If you hug a cat tight enough, it squeaks…. Oh, and I don't own Lupin III.

Hap-py Birthday!

Crap, I mean New Year's…. Too many Christmas specials the past month for me. Oh, new story up by the way…. I was in a bit of a sad bastard mood so it's a lot more depressing than my usual works. Yeah, the title's based off of a Dean Martin song…. It's a one-shot, but the more and more I look at it the more I'm tempted to add onto it. Eh, well, if there's enough feedback I'll consider lengthening it. My main objective is still this story, though—So onward! Oh, P.S.: Thanks to Lazslo for his help : ) He may not read this, but he still deserves my word of thanks.

Fun Fact of Boredom: There were actually a few ideas for a boyfriend for Odori, but one was too much like Ryo's character and the other just plain annoyed me…. So thank goodness for the guy she's (hopefully) landed now.

Chapter Thirty-three: Here's that Rainy Day

"Nothing? You're sure?" Fuji looked over the screen again worriedly and then looked to Heiji.

"Nothing at all…. Not even a picture," Heiji sighed and shut the lap top and looked up at Fuji, who was on the bed behind him overlooking his work from the floor. "I don't get it! I tried everything…. Police reports, Google—Everything! These guys don't technically exist."

"Just great!" she moaned and fell back on the bed. "I have to know my opponents weaknesses and every move so I can outwit them! And all I get are two names!"

"Anthony Perry and Hector DeLeon," Heiji looked over the otherwise sparse papers and sat himself beside Fuji on the bed. "Maybe you should lay low for a while, until they give up."

"Na-ah! There's somethin' to a be a' stealing and I'mma gonna steal it!" Fuji bounced up from the bed and walked over to her equipment. "I've got a reputation to hold up, afterall!"

"Yeah, but try dragging along a lovestruck Odori and moody Yukiko with you," Heiji rolled his eyes and heard a shout from the room across from them that could have only come from Yukiko, who was in the middle of yet another mood swing.

Toshiro slid into Fuji and Heiji's room, slamming the door shut behind him. "Can I hide out in here for a little while? I don't even know what the hell I did, this time! And she always scares me when she starts polishing her guns…."

"Sure, Toshiro-chan," Fuji answered before Heiji could raise his voice to speak in protest. "You and Heiji can bond while I go check on the rest, okay? Okay!"

"…Does the happiness ever, you know, get to you?" Toshiro asked.

"Hey, I'm the one marrying her, not you, so it really shouldn't concern you," Heiji answered. "Now if you excuse me, I'm still an Interpol employee, so I've got to report in for work."

"Why do you still hate me after all of these years?" Toshiro wondered aloud.

"Because you abandoned your family for your own selfish reasons."

"Heiji, I had my own family at that point!"

"After all Dad did for you, and how he put up with your whiny ass, you still just couldn't even visit!" Heiji growled and stormed out. "I'm heading out to Interpol HQ. Send Fuji my love."

"Yeah," Toshiro nodded and looked down at the mess of paperwork at his feet. One paper in particular caught his eye, and he lifted it up and scanned over it. "….No way…."

New York, about ten years ago:

"I can't believe I'm doing this," Julia said in a sing-song voice through gritted teeth as she looked about for police officers nervously. Her right leg twitched out of nervousness, and she looked continually to her left and then right for any suspicious persons. She heard a crash and jumped, nearly sending the Vespa into drive as she squeezed on the handlebars. Luckily, she had put it into a neutral mode, and was relieved to see only a cat scampering down the city street.

"Miss me?" Toshiro whispered in her ear, and Julia gave a shout and jumped.

"Toshiro!" she shrieked and smacked him roughly on the arm. "What in the hell are you trying to do, kill me? Grrr…. Did you get it! I'm freezing here!"

"Yeah, yeah, I got it," Toshiro seated himself on the back of the Vespa and kissed her gently, though awkwardly, for this was new to both of them on the mouth. "Come on, let's head out."

"Where ya'll goin'? Ain't ya gonna stay fo' us?" Toshiro froze at the sound of a deep, thick Southern accent. "Tony, don't you think that's a bit rude?"

"Heh, they're New Yorkers, what'd you expect?" a voice joined the Southern one, and from what Toshiro could tell, he sounded like a black man who was not a stranger to a big city. "And they don't exactly welcome backwater inbreds, I'm sure…."

The Southerner gave a small growl and then a guttural chuckle, "Well, we can learn 'um some manners… Like how it ain't good to steal from others."

"Listen, I'll give you two whatever you want, just let us go…. At least let her go," Toshiro said with a sigh of defeat. He leaned inward to Julia and whispered. "It'll be all right, Julia, I swear."

"She yo' sweetheart? Or your Maman?" Hector asked with a laugh. "You's a little young to be out on your own, boy. Don't you know? There's dangerous people out and about this time a' night."

"We'll let the girl go, she wasn't part of the plan, and I don't like killing women," said Tony.

"They scream too damn much," Hector interjected.

"…..But you and that bag of what you took stays," Tony continued, stepping out of the shadows. He was a man who stood about five and a half feet tall, and wore a completely black suit that covered even his face and hands. He looked like some sort of cross between a ninja and the S.W.A.T. team officers Toshiro went drinking with when they were in full uniform.

Hector then stepped out of the shadows. He was a tall man with a black cane that matched a long leather coat he wore. Most of his features were covered up as well, with thick boots, leather gloves and a mask that made even Toshiro jump back in surprise. He had seen skulls before, in museums, and the mask that Hector wore looked like an authentic one.

"I don't want to leave you here," Julia whispered shakily.

"I'll be fine, I train for freaks like these," Toshiro answered. "You just go home and put on a pot of tea for me, all right? I'll be home soon."

"Y-yeah," Julia nodded, but still felt unsettled at the thought of leaving Toshiro with the two sinister looking figures.

Toshiro kissed her briefly, then turned his attention back to Hector and Tony, but Hector had vanished. He turned about suddenly and was nearly struck with a blow Hector had attempted to deliver with his long black cane. He instead hit a garbage can, and put a reasonable dent in it—Reasonable meaning that he crushed the trash can.

Toshiro jumped up on a fire escape and drew one of his swords, and watched as Tony began to scale up after him. Toshiro swung at Tony, and then went black. Something had hit him roughly on the back of the head.

"Damn it, Hec!" Tony shouted as Toshiro lay there knocked out on the fire escape. "I told you not to kill him!"

"He ain't dead!" Hector called back, and picked up his cane from the pavement. He had had to set it aside briefly in order to lift up the trash can lid and slam it against the back of Toshiro's skull. "He breathin'! Let's go!"

"Yeah," Tony nodded, and glanced down at the crumpled body in the gi once more before hopping off of the fire escape with the bag of Toshiro's pillage from the night. "Come on, man, I'll buy you coffee."

"Sound good, sound good," Hector said with a smile of satisfaction, although no one could see it. The mask obscured his facial features, for the most part.

Present day France:

"Okay…. Stay-at-home dad…. First day," Max clasped his hands together and hit the alarm once again. He hadn't any need for the alarm; he had been up most of the night worrying. "Well…. Ehehe…. How bad could it be?"

"Hey, have you seen my razor?" Leo stuck his head out of the bathroom door and looked toward Max hopefully.

"Dad!" Dako shouted. "Jared set the kitchen on fire and Avery's got his diaper off!" Dako shouted.

"I can usually cook, you were just hovering over me too much!" Jared shouted.

"You're just a show off!" Dako snapped.

Max hopped out of bed, walked over to the dresser and tossed Leo a new razor nonchalantly on his way out the day. In the hall, he lifted up the running Avery and carried the squirming boy underneath his arm all the way into the kitchen, where sure enough, there was a good blaze beginning on one of the burners.

"You use salt for small fires like this," Max said tiredly as he opened the bag of salt and threw it over the burner, while Jared stood in the corner and watched. Max shoved the bag in Jared's hands and muttered, "Clean it up when it cools," and then went upstairs into Avery's nursery and fitted him with a new diaper, as well as a denim jumper and green _Mankii-chan_ shirt.

"…..Was it just me, or did he actually do something _right_?" Dako asked with a raised eyebrow. On one side of her stood Jared with the salt bag still in his hands, and on the other was Leo in his purple kimono, patting his face with a towel.

"….I… I think he did. A series of right things," Leo answered. "I'm gonna check on him before I go, guys."

"I would think—You don't have any pants on, and they're in your guys' room," Dako answered quickly, and turned back to Jared. "Are you going to clean that friggin' kitchen or are you waiting for the mice to show up to help you?"

"Yeesh, I'm goin'…. You're going to die old and alone if you talk to boys like that," Jared muttered.

Leo sighed and headed up the stairs to his and Max's room, and found Zenigata dressing for the day, "Well, that's a good thing, huh? You don't have to wear a suit anymore."

"Yeah, I feel weird wearing jeans on a Tuesday…. Now I know what your world feels like," Max said as he eyed Leo's black jeans on the bed.

"Ha ha… Laugh all you want, they're comfortable, and I look damn good in them," Leo said, tossing aside his kimono and putting on the jeans and then searching about for a pair of socks. "Now where are…."

"Top left," Max said without even looking back at Leo. Leo blinked a few times, opened the said drawer to the dresser and pulled out a pair of socks.

"I love when you talk domestic like that," Leo kissed Max on the cheek and then pulling out a shirt from his closet. Max paused a moment and then looked over his shoulder at Leo.

"Yeah, it's weird…. I guess I take after my dad like that. He was always more of the homemaker out of my two parents… Although Mom always cooked better."

"HA! January third, Max Zenigata-Lupin finally admits he takes after his father," Leo pointed an accusing finger at Max and smiled. Max rolled his eyes and tossed Leo his tie and walked out of the bedroom.

"Think you're _soooo_ cute," Max smiled and looked back at Leo. "Well, you're right, but that's a different story. Now come on, you'll be late for your flight."

Leo took a quick sip of coffee from the cup lying on the dining room table and just as quickly began to choke on it, "W-what the…?"

"Avery's baby food. You just downed split peas like it was a vodka martini," Max muttered.

"Ugh! Stop me before I do that again!" Leo gave a shudder and picked up his real cup of coffee, and after a quick sip of it he was out the door.

"Hm, I hope he's safe," Max said to himself. And then Avery began to cry, and he was quickly drawn away from his deep thoughts to the baby.

Japan:

So he had fought against the mafia. So he had been in gunfights that made the ones in movies look tame. Jordan still didn't have the courage to muster to tell Odori that she had made a huge mistake, and that it was all Fuji's fault. And it had gone as far as to now traveling with Odori to Japan. He knew that the truth would come out some time, but he dreaded the wrath that he knew she would hurl upon him if he were to tell her. She was small, but she could put up a good fight.

"We can stay at an inn for the night. No ninja intruders, I promise," Odori said with a small smile upon her face. The smile was almost permanent, it seemed, although a small amount of sadness could be seen behind it.

"Sounds good," Jordan came to attention and lifted Namiko out of the car while Odori picked up her backpack. Odori was well-known with the owner of the inn, so she acquired the best room for nearly nothing. "Hey, I've got to talk to you when you're done unpacking, all right?" Jordan said to her as he played with an ever-cheery Namiko.

"All right, just one moment," Odori nodded and disappeared into the bathroom in the back.

Jordan sighed and turned Namiko to face him, "I better keep you close to me…. She won't kill me if I'm holding a baby….. Dori, you ready?"

"Yes," Odori nodded and stepped out, dressed in an all-white kimono. "My mother gave it to me; it was hers, and was my grandmother's before that. What do you think?"

'_My stupid timing…' _Jordan cringed, but looked on at the kimono with a smile and nod. "It looks great on you…."

"I had to hem it reasonably…. I'm a bit short for it," Odori admitted. "I… If you would like a Western ceremony, we could do that. I just feel much more comfortable in a kimono."

"Yeah…. Um, I'm sure if you I would too… Listen, I… Woah!" Jordan yelped as Odori took the back of his neck and craned his head down, and then kissed him.

"Not everything has to wait," she said, much to Jordan's disbelief.

"L-listen… I've got a headache," Jordan said with a nervous smile.

"Oh! Oh… Well, that's fine. I'll go get my other bag from the car," she slipped off the kimono, and fortunately for Jordan she had worn her full gi beneath it. He sunk back into couch in the inn room and glanced over at Namiko. "Now, that excuse usually won't work, but fortunately for me, it did. I got lucky—Well, almost…. Ehehehe…. Yeah, look at me like that now, I'll tell you about it when you're older."

"'Kay, dada!" Namiko answered and embraced him tightly about the waist.

"Now I really do have a headache," Jordan murmured.

Seattle:

"Who in this entire state would even put a death threat against anyone?" Ryo asked as she walked beside Fuji, sipping her coffee and pulling her jacket tighter against the strong winds. "I don't even think people come out of their houses here!"

"I know… It's weird! I don't even think I've ever been to Seattle! Hey, you gonna share that coffee or am I going to have to pull it out of your married hands."

"Sure, I—Wait! What?" Ryo's eyes widened and she stopped on the street corner. Fuji turned back about and smiled, and took a few skips back until hitting the lamppost, "How do you know about that? Fuji, tell me!"

"Ohhh I have my ways. Why do you think I'm getting married? You broke the pact, so if I turn fifty and I'm alone I'm out of luck!"

"….You're kidding… Why do I think Ari's not the only bi one?"

"Hey, they say it's genetic," Fuji gave a wink and a sideways glance at Ryo.

"Oh my God… Why are you telling me this?"

"Because you're my friend and friends tell one another the little annoying things about one another!" Fuji answered. "Although, I'll admit that I am a little upset over you not inviting me…"

"Fuji… I… I'm sorry… He just showed up and whisked me off like I was in some kind of fairytale… And he's hard to resist when he puts the charm on."

"Eck, gag me," Fuji laughed and punched Ryo lightly in the shoulder. "I'm happy for you, really…. Just don't getting pregnant on me right away, I need my driver as long as possible! It's bad enough Dori's fawning over my half brother and Yukiko-san's so pregnant… They're giving a bad name to women in the work force the way they're acting! Next thing I know, they'll be wearing aprons and baking cookies!"

"Uh, Fuji…"

"I know, I know… I sound like a frigid bitch… But I can't help it! I'm losing my work force faster than Janet Jackson loses her clothes… Before I know it I'll have to bring in some of Jordan's guys!"

"Fuji…."

"And then it'll be the inevitable 'blah, blah, blah… I told you about working in large groups, Fuji… Blah, blah, blah'!"

"Fujiko!" Ryo shouted, and took a quick step back.

"WHAT? Boy, you're bitchy today… Are you sure you're not pregnant?"

"Look out!" Ryo grabbed onto Fuji and pulled her down onto the concrete, Fuji's head missing the black wooden cane by seconds.

"Why didn't you say something sooner?" Fuji shouted.

Ryo growled and grabbed her by the her choker necklace, "I'm two seconds from killing you!"

"No time—Run!" Fuji shouted and picked up Ryo from the ground, and dodged down at alleyway in order to get away from the tall man in the skull mask. "The people here are freaks!"

"Fuji…"

"What the hell n—There's someone behind me, isn't there?" Fuji asked with a nervous chuckle as she felt a blade dig into her back.

"Yeah," Ryo answered blandly. "And they say you're a genius."

"Tony, you got 'um?" the tall masked figure shouted from the sidewalk, his footsteps audible from the alley.

"Yeah, I got her…" a blade shot out from his other glove, and Tony held this up to Fuji's neck. "Now don't scream…."

"There are only two places I scream…. One's on a rollercoaster the other's in the sack!" Fuji quickly ducked out of the way as Ryo threw off one of her many bracelets, this one a smoke bomb in disguise.

"Damn it! Hec, they're getting away!" Tony shouted as he began to wave the smoke from in front of his face.

"I got 'um! Don' you worry none…." Hector answered confidently as he stepped in front of their only exit. Ryo grabbed onto a fire escape bar and swung over Hector's head while Fuji slid in between his legs and out onto the street.

"They're gaining!" Ryo shouted. "Don't you have a better idea than running, Fuji?"

"Yeah, buying tennis shoes!" Fuji answered, jumping in front of the first car she saw barreling down the road. "STOP!" The terrified man swerved out of her way and screeched his brakes on, and Ryo quickly pulled him out while Fuji hopped into the passenger seat.

"Great, automatic…" Ryo grumbled and sped off, turning a sharp corner on the soaking road and drenching a group of musicians on a street corner.

"Hector, let them go!" Tony shouted as he emerged from the smoke-filled alley. "We'll get them later…. Come on, I'm catching a damn cold out here." Hector nodded, and slowly turned about and followed Tony back into the alley.

Back at the hotel:

"Ha… HACHOO!" Fuji gave another loud sneeze and moaned as she fell back onto her bed. "I'm dyingggg…."

"No, you forgot your umbrella," Ryo answered, and stepped out of the kitchen with an icepack to ease Fuji's headache.

"I didn't have time with the guys… Trying to kill me… How about you—Why aren't you sick, huh?"

"Because I eat right," Ryo answered and seated herself beside Fuji.

"Fuji, phone," Ally entered her bedroom and passed it to her. "…..Give it back to me after you spray it down with Lysol…."

"You fight big scary Bruce Lee look-alikes and you're afraid of catching a cold… Gimme a break, Ally," Fuji grumbled and took the phone. "Hello?"

"Hey," Heiji said cheerily from the other end, although this ended in a cringe as he heard Fuji blow her nose. "You sound…. Well, like hell…. What happened?"

"Eh, I almost got killed, walked away from that one, but caught the flu in the process."

"That sucks. Well, I've got some info for you on gentleman callers…. One Tony Perry, Ivy League graduate, and Hector DeLeon, bayou swamp rat who did time for killing his dad."

"Ouch. I've been tempted, but I've never gone quite that far," Fuji shuddered. "That it?"

"They've been a team for almost a decade now…"

"A team like a gay team or more like Superman and Batman."

"The latter… That's not the most interesting part."

"Enlighten me, great Confusus…"

"They're employees for the United States government."

"…."

"Fuji? You there?"

"I've got to make a few phone calls…. I'll get back to you, Heiji-chan."

"Yeah… Don't go postal on me, okay?"

"I won't… Love you, talk to you later," Fuji said sweetly, followed by a sneeze.

"You too… You should really eat better, Fuji…"

"Bye," she grumbled, and slammed down the phone, and then picked it up and began to dial again.

Paris:

"It's dinner, and it's good…" Jared said in disbelief as he poked the chicken in front of him.

"And there's absolutely no frost on it," Dako added, cutting into it and taking a bite. "Hey, Jared…."

"Hrm?"

"He tries to go back to work and we grab him around the knees and throw him to the floor," Dako said, taking another bite of food.

"Agreed," Jared nodded.

"Hey, how's the dinner, guys?" Max stepped out of the kitchen, pushing the door behind him. His hands were full with a plate that carried turnovers he had made during the day.

Dako looked upward at Max with a glare, "Why have you been making us eat Papa's food when you could cook like this? Were you trying to starve me, or do you really, really hate children deep down inside?"

"Woah…. Well, I…. Oh, phone!" Max quickly set down the warm plate and hurried into the kitchen, grateful for the excuse to leave Dako to glare. "Hello?"

"WHY IS YOUR COUNTRY TRYING TO SLAUGHTER ME?" Fuji shrieked into the other end of the phone.

"Wha… Wha… Oh, sorry, mees, you have wrong number," Max said in an indeterminable accent.

"MAX! Max, don't you hang up on me, I know it's—" Fuji was cut off as Max slammed down the phone into its cradle and seated himself slowly in a wooden chair in the kitchen. A few feet away was Avery's highchair, where the boy was playing with his own food. He picked up a handful of apple sauce, and it made contact with the side of Max's face.

Max gave a small sigh, wiped his face clean, and stared down at the apple sauce in his hand, "I miss your Dad, too…"

Seattle:

"Where is he?" Leo glanced down at the paper and then looked around the airport. He spied a sign with his name on it, written in Japanese, and immediately hurried over to who he believed would be his new partner. He hurried through the airport in order to meet up with his temporary partner, accidentally tripping over a piece of rolling luggage along the way and crashing right into a woman.

"Owwww…. Sorry, ma'am," Leo moaned and rose, clutching onto the back of his head. "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine," she sighed, stood and dusted herself off. She picked up her sign, which, curiously enough, was on the one with Leo's name upon it.

"Oh, you must be the driver for myself and Inspector Kosai!" Leo said, shaking her hand.

"Charley Kosai?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yeah, the best officer on Honshu, I hear!"

"I _am_ Charley," she answered with a small glare.

"O-oh… Um… Wow, sorry about that," Leo gave a nervous smile, and gave Inspector Kosai a better look-over. A small Japanese woman with round features and…. A noticeable figure…

"It's all right, and understandable. You most be Inspector Lupin," Charley returned the handshake and gave a smile. "I've heard a lot about you…"

"Eh, good things, I hope!" Leo said with a nervous laugh in an attempt to try to work his way out of his embarrassment. "Here, let me help you with your luggage."

"I'm fine, thank you," she lifted up her suitcase and looked over a paper in her hand. "But you hail a cab to our hotel, if you're in the mood to be helpful."

"Not a problem," Leo answered and walked out of the airport with her, opening his umbrella and holding it out for her. "Err…. So, I don't know that much about you, Ma'am!"

"Not much to share, Inspector," Charley answered. "I'm not rude… Just not big on talking… I don't mind listening, though. I've been told I'm a pretty good one!."

"Nah, it's okay. It's not really a day to talk, anyway," Leo responded with a smile.

Japan:

"What rational person would think someone would want to marry them after only knowing them a short time?" Jordan wondered aloud. "That's right… It's not a rational person… She's an Ishikawa…" he rubbed his forehead as Namiko played around him with a frog she had found outside.

"How's your headache?" Odori asked as she entered the room and seated herself beside him at the table.

"Going away slowly. Dori, listen, I—"

"AIEEE!" Jordan first thought the scream had come from Namiko, so was stunned when he realized that it was instead from Odori, who was attempting to brush off the frog that had jumped onto her kimono.

"I've got it, I've got it, don't worry!" Jordan rose and sighed, then picked up the frog by its bag leg and tossed it out an open window.

"… Bye…" Namiko said quietly as she peered her head over the windowsill to catch a glimpse of the hopping frog. "Bye-bye!"

"Are you okay? Calm down… Breath…."

"I… I don't like frogs," Odori admitted in a pant.

"Yeah, apparently…. Crap, I didn't think you were afraid of anything! I guess you are human!"

"Yes, I… I suppose… What was it you were going to say before that…. Incident?"

"Well, about the er, marriage, thing… I…. Have a phone call to take!" Jordan was relived to heart he phone chime suddenly, and quickly ran to it to pick up. "Hello? Woah… Okay, calm down, Fuji… Jeeze, you sound like crap! Yeah… Yeah, okay. We'll be careful… Don't worry…. Yeah, bye."

"What was that about?"

"She needs us there… Apparently there's someone who's trying to kill her, again," Jordan sighed and looked back at Odori. "I'll get to packing… I've got a friend who'll have us in Seattle by nighttime."

"Yes… Thank you…" Odori gave a small sigh and turned back to the bedroom. "I guess this means the babysitter's going to have to wait…"

Seattle:

"So you know about these guys?" Fuji blew her nose once more and broke into a hacking cough.

"Er…. Yes…" Toshiro answered with a shudder, and glanced at Ally, who was spraying disinfectant throughout the hotel room.

"You want more soup or somethin'?" Ally asked, setting down the can.

"No… I'll be fine…. I HATE flu season! I should've gotten my shot," Fuji sniffed. "Any reason they were after you, Toshiro?"

"Well, I had just stolen from a local senator…" Toshiro began. "He had taken various artifacts from charity auctions after bidders had paid for them… And as I remember, I also took a file for another rival Congressman… I got paid a damn near half million."

"So they got it?"

"Nope," Toshiro shook his head and snorted. "Are you kidding? You think I'd put something that important in a friggin' sack?"

"Then where'd you put it?" Fuji sipped her tea and sighed at the warmth running down her sore throat. "Aww…. That's the stuff…"

"I…. Well… I…."

"You forgot, didn't you?"

"I think I lost it while packing…."

"Augh…. Ah…. Ah… ACHOO!"

A restaurant across town:

"So why don't you tell me a little more about yourself?" Charley sipped her tea once again, set it down and smiled from across the table.

"I'm not really that impressive," Leo answered with a shrug. "Happily married, three kids… Pretty boring, really."

"But you're the voice of a popular cartoon character, and the son and brother of world-famous thieves… You're a reformed thief, yourself!"

"…That's not really anything to be proud of," Leo set down his fork and glanced at Charley. "Listen, I don't really like talking about that part of my life…. No offense, but I didn't even talk with Max about that for a while."

"Max… That's your lover, right?"

Leo flushed at this word and nearly choked on his lasagna, "Urm…. I never thought of him with that word, really… I don't mind 'husband'. We argue a little too much to be something like lovers, heh heh…"

"Is that why he's not here now?"

"Nah… We just decided one of us should stay home with the kids, and I'm less domestic than you'd think, so Max took over duties this time. Do you have any kids of your own, Ms. Kosai?"

"Nope… Single girl in the city," Charley laughed lightly. "Not all of us are lucky enough to find 'the one' on the job."

"Hey, that's a nice necklace," Leo sipped his water and pointed to the locket about Charley's neck. "That's…. Hrm…. Looks like it came out of America, early 20th century… Er, correct me if I'm wrong; it's been a while since I've had to really research a piece of jewelry."

"No, no, you're absolutely right!" Charley answered with a smile. "It was a gift from my fiancé."

"Ohhh…. I thought you said you hadn't met anyone."

"He passed away about a year ago," Charley answered quietly.

"Oh…. Oh, wow, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to… What I mean is, I—"

"It's fine," Charley gave a sad smile and poked at her food. "You didn't know. I think you two wouldn't gotten along great, though!"

"Really? Why's that?" Leo began to sip his drink again as he waited for Charley's answer.

Charley smiled and winked, "He loved blondes, too." And Leo then began to choke once again.

Paris:

"And that's how to pass a sobriety test when you're drunk," Max said as Dako and Jared sat in front of him on the floor of the living room, their jaws dropped.

"Cool!" Jared smiled and rose from the ground enthusiastically. "Could you tell us how to pass a drug test, next?"

Max gave a chuckle and leaned forward, "Nah, but I can show you how to use a jutte…"

"Awesome!" Jared said with a gasp of joy.

"You don't even know what one of those is!" Dako said with disgust.

"Shut up! I do so! I was almost a ninja!"

"Almost… Probably barely," Dako answered, and sat up on the carpet, still clutching onto her pillow.

"Door… I'll get it. Don't you two go killing one another—I already bought groceries for dinner tomorrow, and it's too much for me to eat." Max stood and tossed on Leo's purple and gold kimono over his own track pants and shirt and then grabbed his gun. He looked through the peephole of the door and slumped his shoulders with a sense of relief as he saw it was only Fujiko, who had next to her an extremely annoyed-looking husband, with a brown bag in his arms.

Max opened the door and raised an eyebrow as Fujiko walked past him. Lupin stopped at the door and gave Max a tired glance, "You know… The more and more I think about it I think you gay guys are onto something really good."

"Hi, Grandma! What are you doing here? What'd you bring us?" Dako asked with a smile.

"I brought you all some dinner," Fujiko said with a smile.

"Oh, Dad cooked already… But we could always have it for lunch!" Dako answered.

"Oh," Fujiko blinked a few times in surprise, cleared her throat and wondered where to go from there. "Well… I better go check on Avery."

"I just got him to sleep after his bath and giving him his medicine," Max called as Fujiko wandered into a back hall. He then looked to Lupin questioningly.

"She thought you'd need some help with the kids," Lupin explained with a roll of the eyes. "I think she thinks that just because I was a little less than competent when I babysat that you're clueless, too."

"Or maybe it's the fact that I'm a Zenigata," Max muttered as he watched Fujiko disappear down the hall.

"I'd say it's fifty-fifty… Hey, someone just pulled up in your driveway…"

"Oh, you're kidding me," Max grumbled as he watched his own parents emerge from a rental car.

"Explain to me why we took the first flight here?" Zenigata asked.

"Because our son needs our help… Now get that bag—I made the kids dinner."

"You ever think he could handle it on his o….. Oh, wait…. It's Max… Well, he's good at things, too…"

"Yup, he sure is…. He sure is…"

"….You're trying to think of something too, aren't you?"

"He's trilingual," Natasha said with a shrug. "He can program a VCR!"

"That's the kid down the street you're thinking of that can do that…"

"Oh, well… Why worry about stupid things like that?" Natasha gave a nervous chuckle and placed another box atop the two Zenigata was already holding.

A Seattle airport:

"Out like a light," Jordan lifted Namiko up and placed her in the cab in between himself and Odori. "The flight must've taken it out of her!"

"She isn't the only one, I'll admit," Odori replied with a yawn. She situated herself in the cab and glanced at Jordan, and then looked downward at the ground quickly as she realized he had caught sight of her looking at him.

"Umm…. So, heh, that Musashi guy never proposed too you, did he?"

"No, he was already engaged to someone else."

"Yeah… No wonder you let him go, eh? I mean, if he had broken off that relationship with that other girl, she would've been heartbroken… And you wouldn't have wanted that! You probably put yourself in her shoes, eh?"

"If I were her I would have gutted him like a fish and sent him in pieces to various relatives without blinking an eye… That were the words I used to keep him from running off with me."

"Wow… You're a real romantic, you know that? Eh, this hotel, all right, cabbie? The one down there."

"Yeah, but it'll cost you your lives…" replied the female driver in a grave voice.

"Say what?" Jordan choked.

"Heh heh… Best laugh I've had all day," Ryo chuckled and tossed away her disguise. "Sorry about that… I needed something cheer me up."

"You're a complete sadist," Odori smirked, "no wonder you're so in love with Victor."

"That and he's kinda cute when he's asleep," Ryo said with a light chuckle. "….And you've got to love a man who isn't afraid to cuddle."

"Wow…. I know someone who won't be eating tonight after hearing something like that," Jordan muttered.

"Hrm, he can be a good man, when he puts his mind to it," Ryo said with a smile.

"No comment on that…"

"So when are you two planning the wedding, hrm? I heard all about it…"

"We haven't exactly gotten through the details," Odori replied with a light blush and a small far off smile as she looked out the car window.

Ryo grinned at Odori's expression and turned toward the hotel, "I warn you both now, Fuji's got a bad cold…. So be warned. Ally's doing his best to sanitize the place, but there's always a chance of someone catching her friggin' sickness."

"Well, one of them. The gods only know what else she carries," said Odori. "I have seen some of the men she's dated… They look like dogs I've eaten."

"You really do eat dogs?" Jordan asked.

"It's a birthday tradition in some rural parts of Korea," replied Odori with a shrug.

"This is our stop, guys," Ryo interjected suddenly and brought the car to a halt. "Hey, maybe there'll be dog at your guys wedding," Ryo muttered to Jordan as he exited the car.

Across town:

"Nice hotel," Leo looked about the room and set down his bag at his feet.

"Yeah, I'll say! Not bad for one of my first gigs!" Charley answered with a chuckle as she fell back onto the bed.

"Gig?" Leo wondered aloud with a raised eyebrow.

"I… I've never been away from the office much…. Well, you know… Out of Japan!" Charley sat up in bed and smiled. "I'm going to change, Inspector."

"Just Leo's fine… I'm going to set up work," Leo answered, pushing up his glasses and opening his laptop while Charley disappeared into the bathroom. "Oi, what a night… Why's it always women I get hooked up with?" He heard a knock upon the door and sighed, rising from his chair and going to the door. He frowned as he saw no one in the hall, and shrugged and closed the door behind him.

"Who was that?" Charley called.

"Er, no on—Wow," Leo blinked as Charley stepped out in a nightshirt and laid down.

"Are you all right?"

"Yeah. You just look a little bit like someone I used to know, is all," Leo cleared his throat and turned his attention back to his paperwork. '_I'm married, I'm married, I'm married… Wow, she's got a nice set of le—Okay, remember Max… Max who cooks for you, watches over your kids, adopted them. You don't even know this girl, Ari! Damn it, when it all comes down to it, I am my father's son. I shouldn't even be looking, but… Crap, bi's even harder sometimes! Think of a song… Any friggin' song… Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, banana phone… I've got this feeling, it's so appealing—Wait—Raffi? The best I could come up with is **Raffi**? Ugh, I think I need to get out more…'_

"Leo, are you okay?" Charley turned back around at him and looked at him worriedly. "You look sick."

"I'm fine… Just tired," Leo yawned and stretched.

"Oh—Well, turn off your light on the way out of the bathroom," Charley said with fatigue heavy in her voice. "And try not to move around too much."

"Huh?"

"Well, the cot looks uncomfortable, and I know you're like all into guys, so it'd be like having my big brother here," Charley shrugged.

"Oh… Yeah… Uhehehe…." Leo scratched the back of his head and closed his laptop. '_If Max only knew he'd kill me…'_

But Leo soon found he didn't have to worry about this—There was a smashing noise moments later and in the hotel room stood a man in an all-black ninja like set of armor. The man in the skull mask followed inward after a few moments, clutching onto his cane.

"This… Is bad…" Leo said with a gulp. "This is real bad…"


	34. Dirty Laundry

DISCLAIMER: I don't own _Lupin III_, and I'm leaving to work on my true love—_Pinky and the Brain _slash fanfics!... GOT YA! (heh… Btw, I don't look for any _Pinky and the Brain _fics from me anytime soon, or… Ever, for that matter. I like the show, but I'm happy in my niche).

Allo, allo!

Started a new semester, hence the tardiness. New story up—This one's from Lup. If you like Max or Yukiko, or any of the cast, for that matter, I'd definitely check it out : ) You actually get to see Max do his job, something I rarely cover myself. I think he's cooked more than he's shot his gun. Anywayyyy…. Thanks again for reading, and I will hopefully have another chapter out sooner…. Yeah, I could probably push my mat homework back. Pfft…. Degree, who needs it!

P.S.: Lupin the Third Forum now up. If you love me, you'll read.

Fun Fact of Boredom: Inspector Charley Kosai is named after Charley Kosei, the man who did the vocals for many Lupin songs, like _Superhero _(which, while not officially released in the U.S. on CD, I'm sure many of you have).

Chapter thirty-four: Dirty Laundry

Seattle:

"We disrupt ya'll?" Hector asked with a smile from beneath his mask.

"Not unless he was doing her nails," Tony replied as he rose to his full height and ran toward Leo. Lupin lifted up a chair and held it in between himself and his attacker, and was shocked to see one of the legs slice right off. He stared at the blade that had shot out of Tony's outfit's arm, and gulped as he realized the entire length of his arm was covered in the blades. He then noticed the other arm, too, was covered in an equally sharp set of painful looking blades.

"Inspector Kosai!" Leo shouted and looked over at Charley, but the woman was frozen in terror. He fell back onto the bed and grabbed his gun, firing off a shot close to Tony's head. Leo grabbed Charley as Hector swung down upon the bed with his cane and literally busted the mattress in the middle, just as Leo lifted up Charley and ran into his shoes, and out the door.

"He a chicken, or just stupid?" Hector wondered aloud as Tony ran to the laptop.

"It ain't here, Hec," Tony said with a sigh of disappointment. "I guess it's with the other Lupin."

"Well, that make our job a li'l easier," Hector said with a shrug. "Ya think he gonna come back?"

"Probably not…. Come on, let's head out, I'll buy you more coffee."

"Eh, s'like these people never heard a' tea," Hector muttered to himself. "So we just gonna let them go?"

"We're getting paid to take that disk, not to massacre, so don't go screwing it up 'cause you wanna see some heads roll," Tony reminded him.

"Heh, it'd be more like a warning."

"Hector, no is no, all right? Damn it, you're like a damn puppy sometimes when it comes to listening to important directions…. You've got the attention span of a tomato, man, I swear!"

"Let's jus' go… I don' wanna kill no mo' time hear if I don' have to," Hector murmured and exited through the window with Tony.

"Are they gone?" Charley asked from the hallway quietly.

"Yeah," Leo said with a nod, and looked over at her. "Did you freeze up there?"

"I… Urm, yeah," Charley nodded, and embraced Leo tightly about the neck. "Thank you so much for helping me!"

"I… Well, ur… I…" Leo cleared his throat and flushed at this gesture, and attempted to get his mind to wander over to other areas… But little worked, even as he opened the hotel door for his partner. "Come on, let's go get packed. We don't know if they're going to come back or not."

"Yeah," Charley nodded, and retrieved an envelope from her suitcase as she went to packing.

"What's that?" Leo asked.

"Something to send off to a friend," Charley answered quietly, looking down at the package a few moments in contemplation.

Paris, the following night:

"Please, no," Jared begged and covered his eyes as Dako grabbed hold of the remote. "No more reality shows, I beg of you! Mercy, mercy!"

"Oh, shush," Dako grumbled and rolled her eyes. "You're such a big baby! They're one of the few things I actually like on television, so keep quiet!"

"Ohhh…." Jared groaned in response to this and fell back onto the couch. "The only reason you watch these is because you don't have a life!"

"Shut up!" Dako pushed Jared this time, nearly off the couch. She then turned her attention to the television program, which was Japanese but with English subtitles (for not only her and Jared, who were non-native speakers, but for Avery as well, even if he was young).

"…Do you think television stations in Japan have obligatory white reporters?"

"Jared!"

"Tonight on channel ten… A very special series on the enigmatic Lupin the fourth gang and the inspectors who chase them," the announcer began. "We all know about Lupin the third, his exploits are legendary. But his son, Leo Lupin, has stayed out of the spotlight for the most part… We sent out reporter Charley Kobayashi to get the story."

The screen cut away to a choppy video, and sure enough there was Leo, eating at the lasagna from the previous night.

"Max… That's your lover, right?"

"Urm…. I never thought of him with that word, really… I don't mind 'husband'. We argue a little too much to be something like lovers, heh heh…"

"Is that why he's not here now?"

"Nah… We just decided one of us should stay home with the kids, and I'm less domestic than you'd think, so Max took over duties this time. Do you have any kids of your own, Ms. Kosai?"

"…" Jared turned to Dako, and Dako looked to Jared, and both jumped as they heard Max in the background.

"Hey, what are you guys watching?" Max asked, pushing up his glasses.

"Nothing!" Dako flipped the channel with the remote. Max gave an unimpressed tired glare, and looked to Jared for an answer.

"We found these videos," Jared began. "I was looking for my shoes in Papa's closet, and I just kinda found them."

"Videos?" Max murmured. "Umm…. W-what kind?"

"Oh, I didn't watch too much," Jared answered with a shrug. "They got boring really quick."

"G-good," Max muttered and walked out of the living room quickly with a worried look on his face.

"That was awesome! How'd you even know about those!" Dako asked with a gasp of admiration for Jared.

"Eh, lucky guess…. See, I used my ninja skills!" Jared shouted triumphantly.

"Don't get so full of yourself—We've got a lot of work to do…" Dako growled and punched Jared in the arm. "Let's go."

"Go where?"

"We'll call him," Dako answered, rising from her seat. "You're so clueless sometimes, Jared!"

"…I wonder why I take the insults you dish out at me so much," Jared muttered, but he knew, secretly, why he did.

Seattle:

"Oh, no! Well, maybe someone found it," Charley reassured him, resting a hand on his arm.

"Yeah I… I just can't believe I lost another cell phone!" Leo huffed. "This is the third one since June! Good thing it's a company phone."

"Come on, we've got to find another room, at any rate. I'm not spending another night in that car, not for all of the tea in China!" said Charley with a small smile across her features. Leo looked downward at her, and looked away after a few moments. Charley chuckled and folded her arms. "Could we at least find someplace in a hurry? I'm freezing."

"Oh!" Leo quickly removed his jacket and laid it over Charley's shoulders. "There you are, Inspector. Sorry it's not a long Interpol coat. I keep mine at the house… Khaki makes me look like I work in a Target. How about you—Where's yours?"

"It's at the cleaner's," Charley answered quickly as Leo opened the door to the cruiser that had been for them and allowed her to climb in while he walked around to the driver's side.

"I didn't even get to say goodnight to the kids," muttered Leo regretfully.

"I'm sure the feeling was there," Charley answered. "…You really love your kids, huh? What're they like?" His kids were the only thing he would talk about openly, Charley had realized a while back. That and work.

"Well… There's Dako. She's eleven, and takes most after Max. Especially when it comes to her temper."

"She's Max's biological daughter?"

"Ohhhh no. The only woman Max has ever been with—Urm…. Her parents died a while back, and we adopted her so she wouldn't go into an orphanage."

"Oh," Charley blinked, and inched closer to Leo in order to get better sound. Leo misinterpreted this, however, and looked straight forward at the road in front of him, "Well, that's surprising. He seems so nice. You both do—The kids are lucky to have you both. What about the boys?"

"There's Jared… His mom is in New Orleans… At least, I think she is. They never found her after… Well, she disappeared," Leo muttered darkly. "And Avery… He's my biological son, too. He's really sweet, and drives Max and me crazy. This one time, haha, when Max was trying to paint the living room, he—"

'_Please don't let this turn into a whole assignment of him talking about his kids… This guy's got to be more than a domestic,' _Charley thought with a twitch of a smile. '_Please don't pull out the photos…. **Please!**'_

"Do you want to see some pictures?" Leo asked with a bright smile. He was confused as Charley gave a small groan, and concluded that indeed she did not.

On the other side of town:

"It's like I'm trapped," Jordan said to Yukiko with a tiresome sigh. Jigen-Ishikawa simply nodded and placed a hand on her stomach as the baby inside of her kicked for its way out. Jordan glanced down at her stomach, and back up to her face. "Any hints? If anyone can get out of a relationship, it's you."

"Gee, thanks," muttered Yukiko. "Hey, do you have anything with chocolate on you? I'd kill someone for a Skybar right now. Go figure a year ago I would've done the same for a bottle of vodka."

"How did you get through eight months sober?"

"I took up gum chewing," Yukiko answered. "No caffeine, no nicotine, no booze…. I'm the healthiest in my life and I'm friggin' miserable."

"Heh," Jordan smirked and leaned forward. "It's your goofball husband's fault."

"Nah, I'm glad I did it. That means another generation to keep the Jigen and Ishikawa traditions alive…. And to bug the hell out of Lupin."

"Yeah… With song, dance, and probably an alcohol problem. So what do you think I should do about it?"

"Well…. Rich family, you love the kid, and Odori's really cute—If not a little short for you. But you like short girls, and there's always barstools," Yukiko gave a small smirk at Jordan's expression. "What'd be so bad in it? She's really nice…. And I've never seen her this civil around anyone, much less a Lupin, so you know that means that she likes you!"

"Yeah…. She's nice, but…. Crap, talk about rushing!"

"If she really loves you then she'll understand. Just like how you understood why we couldn't work."

"And if she doesn't understand?"

"Then you'll probably die a painful death by the sword," Yukiko shrugged. "It's one of two evils—Commitment or death."

"Jeeze, as much crap that happened between Dad and Fujiko, at least she never tried to slice him into tiny pieces."

"Actually…"

"No, no, no. I don't wanna know," muttered Jordan, rising from his seat. "I'll just go visit her. Thanks for listening."

"No problem," Yukiko answered, uneasily rose and placed a hand on her stomach. "Are you sure you don't have any candy on you? Not even like a Snickers bar?"

Jordan rolled his eyes, dug into his jacket and tossed her a candy bar he had picked up in the airport, "Enjoy. Remember not to eat any of your fingers, tiger."

"Huh? What'd you say?" Yukiko was already in the process of devouring the chocolate bar.

"Ehhh…. Yeah, I'm heading to my room," Jordan smiled and exited Yukiko and Toshiro's room, and walked down the hall to his. He paused as he placed a hand on the doorknob, and thought how he would handle the situation. Death, marriage, death, marriage… Things just never came easily to him.

He opened the door and immediately felt a body crash into him, and looked down at Odori with unsaid confusion.

"Oh, h-hello," Odori muttered and took a few steps back. "I was just trying on a different pair of sandals. You know, for…"

"Listen, Dori," Jordan took her by the arms and sighed. "About… The wedding…."

"Yes?" Odori gave a hopeful smile and looked upward at the pained Jordan.

"Well… I…"

"Hey, guys!" Fuji shouted hoarsely. "Ari's on the TV!" this statement was followed by a long line of hacking and coughing.

"We'll talk later," Jordan said quickly, and ran into Fuji's room, glad that he had an excuse to do so. He rushed out, and was immediately surprised by the presence of whom he thought first to be Ari, but with further inspection, he realized was Victor, seated in Fuji's room, beside the ailing Lupin's bed. He had a bottle of hand sanitizer on one arm of the wingback chair, and was rubbing his hands while staring at the screen.

"I'm as shocked as you are," Victor admitted with his usual calm expression, not bothering to look away from the news report.

"Someone explain what he's doing here?" Jordan asked, pointing to his cousin.

"He knows about our attackers," Fuji sniffed. "Don't you, Victor?"

"They did work for me for a time," Victor admitted with a small sigh and a shift in his seat. "They're two of the best assassins you can hire. I hear they do government work mainly, now, but they were still freelance when I hired them. That makes me feel incredibly old… I'm sure you could understand. You're close to forty, aren't you?"

"I wonder sometimes how you've stayed alive this long, Victor," Fuji admitted after a pause.

"You and me both," Victor rose from his chair and turned to Fuji. "I've given you all of the information I can, but that's all I can offer you."

Toshiro, who was also in the room and had remained silent for a majority of the discussion, looked over at Victor with concern, "Do you think it has anything to do with the disk I stole?"

"If it were about the disk I think that the motive would be to keep killing until they find out which one of you has it," Victor admitted as he began to pull on his heavy jacket. "That's just my thinking, though."

"What makes me think that you have something behind all of this?" Toshiro asked darkly.

"Why would I try to kill Ryoko?" Victor asked with a slight hiss in his voice as he took a step toward the samurai.

"Because I think you're the devil incarnate," Toshiro answered sternly, rising from his spot on the floor.

"And your wife is still more butch than you, no matter how pregnant," Victor returned quickly.

"Listen, are we just going to fight, or are we going to try to catch the bad, ur…. Worse guys?" Fuji asked nervously as she rose from the mounds of tissue on her bed placed herself in between the two men, both who looked ready to face off at the drop of a dime.

"I'll fight as soon as he leaves," Toshiro said as he slowly began to draw one of his swords.

"I can't help but agree with you on that," Jordan muttered, his hand going slowly to his hip.

"Two against one? I don't like the odds, but it's not impossible," Victor said with a smile as he began to draw his own gun. Just as he went to draw, a force zoomed through the room, and Odori came to a dead stop in the middle of the three men, holding two guns and two swords and wearing an unamused expression.

"This is the reason I gave up on her," Victor said to Jordan as he grabbed his gun from the samurai and placed it back in its holster. "As I was saying…. I gave you all that I could in the way of information, but they're both reclusive men. I never even saw their real faces, to tell the truth. I will tell you though, that they are both extremely intelligent men."

"Yeah, but they're not gods," Fuji said with a smile through her nausea.

"Why do I think you have a plan, Fuji?" Toshiro asked tiredly.

"Maybe because I do," Fuji answered. "I'm going to get those two out of my hair and I'm going to find that disk and become rich off of it! And I'm also going to find out when Ari got a television contract in the process. Translating, voiceovers, thievery and police work….. Talk about over achiever! He always makes the holidays awkward for me-ah…. Meh-ah… Ah, ACHOO!... Where'd my Vix go?"

"How special. Try not to get your cold or hepatitis or whatever else you're carrying on me," Victor murmured, grabbing his gun roughly from Odori on the way out. "I'll see myself out… After visiting with Ryoko."

"You and the wife have a good time now!" Fuji called, blowing a kiss in Victor's direction and waving him off weakly. Victor tripped lightly and at this comment, cleared his throat and continued out the door.

"Have a good day," muttered Victor, closing the door behind himself.

"….She married him?" Toshiro wondered aloud.

"Yeah," Fuji sighed and frowned, and then slapped Jordan on the back of the head.

"OW! What!"

"Why couldn't you have gotten off of your ass and come sooner, so you could've married her and we would've been in-laws!"

"Why didn't you just friggin' marry her?"

"Because Dad didn't need THREE in the family!" Fuji answered tiredly.

"Three?" Jordan repeated with a frown.

"We've got another one—The one who lives in Australia. Anyway, that doesn't matter," Fuji shook her head and slowly seated herself on the bed. "What we've got to worry about is Toshiro finding that disk, and getting the Brothers Grimm of our backs."

"I'm working on it," Toshiro said with a sigh. "I've got Yukiko's mom tearing up the entire apartment looking for it."

"So we basically just try to fend them off until then?" Odori asked with obvious annoyance.

"Well, um… Yeah," Fuji shrugged, scratching the back of her head. "It's been raining too heavily for any planes to leave or come in ever since Dori and Jordan showed up—"

"Ryo told you that you should've left then," Toshiro chimed in.

"I know, I know," Fuji coughed and hit her chest once in order to cease the hacking attack. "Now get Ally in here. I need some soup, and I'm out of tissues."

Across the city:

"Ow…"

"Hm?" Leo raised his head and put on his glasses after knocking down all of the other contents on the coffee table in front of couch he was sleeping on.

"Ouch," Charley murmured, and from what Leo could make out, she was rubbing one of her ankles. He rose, still wrapped in the hotel blanket, and seated himself on the edge of Charley's bed.

"Ankle?" Leo asked after a moment.

"Yeah," Charley answered with a small nod. "I must've hurt it… Why would I only be feeling it now, though?"

"Oh, it's okay," Leo said with a small smile. "Once… When I was a lot younger, my best friend at the time shot me on a hunting trip, and I didn't realize it until I saw the blood!"

"….He accidentally shot you, right?"

"….Sure…. Anyway, sometimes you don't feel pain for a while. It's kind of mind over matter," Leo said with a shrug as he placed a hand on her foot and began to check to see if it was indeed sprained, or perhaps broken.

"Ow!" Charley hissed and laid her head against the headboard.

"Yeah…. That's gonna be sore for a…While…" Leo looked away and cleared his throat, wondering how to possibly keep up a conversation with her. "I'll get you some ice!"

"Thanks," Charley murmured and watched as Leo opened the door to the hotel room and stumbled out onto the cool concrete. She looked down at her necklace and sighed, and back upward at the door. "I think I know what they meant by not getting emotionally involved now…. Some people go overseas and document wars; I'm feeling guilty about a little documentary like this! Well…. This or starve, I guess."

"Back," Leo opened the door and held up a bucket of ice. He walked into the bathroom and walked out with his shirt and jeans on, as well as the ice now in a bag. He sat down beside Charley and instructed her as he placed the bag on her ankle, "Now just keep it still, all right? You ought to be fine. Hey… What's wrong?"

Tears had formed in Charley's eyes, and Leo felt a pang of guilt, thinking it was his fault. Charley lunged forward and grabbed onto Leo's dress shirt, and gave a long wail, signaling the start of her tears, "You're so much nicer than I thought you'd be! I'm so sorry!"

"Sorry?" Leo wondered. "What are you sorry for?"

"I… It's nothing," Charley wiped her eyes and lied back against the headboard. "I-I'm fine…. Just… My ankle."

"Yeah," Leo nodded, his suspicions ever growing as to what exactly Charley's full story was. He looked around the room, but his vision always fell back to the still-crying woman next to him. '_It's three in the morning, someone's trying to kill me, I'm in bed with someone who I think needs a straitjacket, and someone's crying. Wow, just like home.'_

"You're so kind," Charley sniffed. "I wish I could meet someone like you…"

'_Ohhhh boy…. The boyfriend speech. She's worse than Max is when he's hit his emotional lows,' _Leo thought, but gave a small sigh and allowed her to continue.

"It's always the nice guys like you that are taken," Charley muttered.

"I'm sorry. B-but I'm sure you'll find someone," Leo said tiredly, and leaned forward to shift Charley's ice pack, that had fallen off of her ankle. As he sat back once again, he felt a face press against his, and knew things were about to reach a whole new level of difficult.

France:

"Try it again!" Jared urged.

"What do you think I've been doing, ordering pizza!" Dako snapped. "He isn't picking up!"

"Crap… Where do you think he is? Do you think he was kidnapped? Do you think it was—"

"If you say 'ninjas' one more time, I'm going to practice those wrestling moves I see on TV on you," Dako warned. She slammed the phone down once again in frustration, and both jumped away from the telephone as they heard Max shuffle into the kitchen. They relieved to see that it wasn't Max, however, and it was only their grandfather.

"….Why do I have the feeling you two are up to something?" Lupin asked as he removed Avery's firmly clutched fist from his tie. He made a small motion to the boy, who still was confused as to why everyone made hand gestures around him.

"What are you talking about?" asked Dako with a wide smile. "Where's Grandma, Dad, Nana and Ojiisan?"

"Grandma and Nana went clothes shopping… And Totsan and your dad went to their obligatory yearly father-son bonding ritual…. Dinner in awkward silence."

"So you got stuck with us, huh?" Jared said with a wide smile.

"I'll bet Grandma suckered him into it," Dako said to her stepbrother with a chuckle and a nudge. Lupin gave a roll of the eyes, and set Avery done on the ground to explore.

"They promised me that it'd be for a short time," Lupin explained. "Now care to come clean?"

"Eh… We wanted to order pizza," Dako shrugged.

"When's it coming, then?"

"Coming? Eh, well…"

"Papa'sintroubleandweweretryingtoreachhimbecausehe'sonTVandsomeone's makinghimlooklikeanidiotonpurpose!" Jared shouted suddenly, cracking from the pressure.

"You IDIOT!" Dako shouted.

"Woah, slow down… Your papa was on TV?" Lupin asked. "…..W-What was it of? I-I mean, there're a few videos out there, ehehe…"

"It's not the video that shows where Avery came from, if that's what you're hinting at," Dako said to a stunned Lupin. "It's like a newscast…"

"Mm-hm," Lupin nodded and lifted up the telephone from the receiver, "What channel?"

"A Japanese one um…. Nippon TV," Dako said after a moment's thought.

"You're lucky—I infiltrated that place once while looking for some dirt they had on me… They're like the Japanese version of Fox, almost," Lupin explained. "Except without that wonderful show known as the _Simpsons_ or the occasionally funny _Family Guy_ episode."

"So you know the number?" Jared asked.

"Even better," Lupin answered with a smile, reaching for his coat.

"Wait—Aren't you going to get into trouble?" Dako asked as she followed her grandfather to the coat rack in the living room.

"Probably—Dress Avery in something warm, will you?—But it's worth it," Lupin answered. "No one makes an idiot out of my kid unless it's their own fault…"

"Grandpa… That TV station's in Japan," said Dako, trying to instill some sense into her grandfather.

"Yeah, you're right," Lupin's shoulders slumped in thought for a few moments. "You kids better pack your bags, too."

"He's crazier than Uncle Goemon," Jared muttered.

"Just get packing," Dako answered with a roll of the eyes as she turned and walked into her room. "One thing this family isn't is boring…"

"Hey, could you just buy us new stuff when we get there?" Jared shouted from his room.

"Good thinking! It'll save on packing!" Lupin replied.

"….It's like if someone's a guy in this family they're brain-dead," she added, tossing her shirt aside and sighing.

Seattle:

"Thanks for everything," Charley said quietly as she broke away from Leo and rolled over in bed, leaving Lupin stunned and staring straight ahead at the blank wall, trying to piece together exactly what in the hell had happened. "Are you going back to sleep on the couch?"

"Yeah… In a minute… Or five," Leo answered, clearing his throat and reaching for the remote. Charley grew obviously worried, and then remember that she had prepared for this, as well.

"I don't believe it," Leo rolled his eyes as he found the television would not switch on. With a quick scan of the wall, it was obvious why, "Rat's chewed through the wires! I knew we should've gone one star higher… Me and my being cheap."

"I don't mind it…. Hey, Leo?"

"Hrm?"

"You're really sweet…. You don't have a brother, do you?" asked Charley with a smile. Leo in response calmly pulled out his wallet and let the long line of pictures encased in plastic fall down on the bed.

"Take your pick," Leo muttered.

"Oh," Charley sat up and scanned through the photos. "He's cute… What's his name?"

"That's Peter. Priest."

"Ohhh… Another gay guy," Charley said with a frown and sigh of disappointment. "How about him?"

"That's Jordan. He's not too bad. Tried to kill my dad once, but they're past that and are on good terms now," Leo answered with a casual shrug.

"Wow! He's really cute—And he doesn't look anything like you, either! Who's he?"

"My husband."

"Heh, whoops…." Charley gave a weak smile and let the photos she had been holding drop back onto the bed. "Well, if they're as nice as you are, I hope I can meet at least one of them."

"You probably will, if we'll be working together," Leo answered, and stood from the bed. "Well, good night, Inspector."

"Good night," Charley replied, and sunk down into her comforter.

That morning:

"You think you found it?" Toshiro asked excitedly. "Well, put it in!... More scripts? Damn it! Okay, keep looking, and call me if you find anything interesting." He hung up the phone and rose, stretched and looked to his still-sleeping wife. He knelt down and smiled until she woke up, slightly stunned by the set of eyes staring back at her.

"Um… Hey. I got something in my teeth?" Yukiko asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Good morning," Toshiro kissed her on the forehead and yawned.

"….You haven't slept yet, have you, you moron?" Yukiko asked with worry as she slowly sat up and placed a hand upon her stomach.

"Does falling asleep in the middle of an argument with Heiji on the phone count?" Toshiro asked with a small laugh.

"Eh, no. He headin' over here anytime soon?"

"Later this morning," Toshiro answered as he helped her rise from the bed and followed her into the bathroom.

"Hey, grab me a kimono."

"What?"

"A kimono. Like that thing you wear," Yukiko answered plainly. Toshiro gave a nod and left, returning with a navy-colored kimono, and he was more than slightly surprised as Yukiko put this on, as well as tied her hair up.

"….Did you take too many pills again?" asked Toshiro.

"No, this is just easier to wear," Yukiko answered with a yawn. "And I feel like being lazy today…. She's taking a lot out of me."

"Yeah, she's taking up a lot of space, ehehe…."

"So I'm getting fat?" Yukiko asked with a glare.

"Yu-Yuki… You're eight months pregnant…. Of course you put on a little weight… B-but you're still beautiful!" Toshiro sputtered.

"I'll give you a five-second start before I start beating you with my hairbrush," Yukiko said, gripping onto the said brush.

"I-I'm gonna try to find you some sandals," Toshiro sputtered, and backed his way out of their bedroom and straight into Jordan. "Oh, you! Have you seen my sister around?"

"I was about to ask you that," Jordan murmured, shoving his hands in his pockets and glancing to his left and right.

"What's up with you?"

"Eh, it's…. It's nothing…"

"Oh, this is about there not really being a wedding thing, right?"

"What! Crap! Who told you!" Jordan yelped, jumping back from the samurai.

"Heiji," Toshiro shrugged.

"And who told him?"

"Fuji," Toshiro answered.

"Well, as long as she doesn't know," Jordan said with a sigh of relief. Not a second later was there a strong blow to his stomach, and he doubled over, and looked to his left to see a tear-filled Odori, who was clenching her teeth and fists so tightly that she shook.

"I…. You couldn't even give me the decency to tell me!" Odori shouted. "I… I don't want to see you again. I want you to be around neither myself nor my daughter, ever again! We're finished!"

"Dori, wait!" Jordan coughed, and glared up at Toshiro.

"I didn't tell her," Toshiro said defensively.

"Dori!" Jordan ran a few feet to her, but Ishikawa drew her sword, and held it to Jordan's neck.

"I'm telling you to stay away from me," said Odori with a hiss. She looked back at her brother and continued, "Toshiro, you look after Namiko for a few hours. I will be back when he is packed and on his way."

"Wait! What? Listen, I never even said I—Odori!" Jordan shouted, but the samurai continued walking down the hall, not looking back and Toshiro and not looking back at Jordan. "…Christ…. Someone shoot me now."

"I'll call Victor if you want," Toshiro pushed his bangs out of his eyes and crept into his room.

"Jeeze," Jordan placed his head in his hands and wondered where to go from where he stood. He didn't wait long—Odori's unmistakable scream was heard moments later, and he went bolting down the stairs.

"HEY!" Jordan shouted, and hit the landing with a thud, but it was too late. The screeching of tires could be heard, and at the floor of the stairwell was Odori's sword. "Damn it… Fuji! Heiji! They've got Odori!"

"Always me," Fuji muttered with a roll of the eyes, standing and immediately falling back onto the bed. "Crappp…."

"I'll go with you guys," said Toshiro.

"No, no… You stay with Yuki, make sure she doesn't try to escape or anything," Fuji stood and slid into her heels. "I'm going with everyone else… Ally!"

"Hrm?"

"Bring me my jacket… And my Dayquil," Fuji said with a sniff.

Japan:

"You're their father?" the TV producer repeated with a raised eyebrow.

"Mm-hm," Lupin nodded, and looked at the two wary children behind him, both in disguise. Avery was in one of his arms, squirming futilely, while in the other hand was his cell phone, and still on the phone a very angry message from Max. He ignored this, however, and kept insisting to the guard that he once worked in the studio.

"I just want to show them my old office," Lupin answered with a smile.

"Pleassseeeeeee?" Dako and Jared begged in unison.

"Well… I guess. But don't let the boss know," the producer muttered, and led them to a back room.

"Thank you so much," Lupin chuckled in his natural voice, and placed a damp rag over the man's mouth. He collapsed to the floor while both children looked upward at their grandfather in horror.

"Relax, he's just sleeping," Lupin reassured them as he stepped over the body and into the back room. "Now… Let's find that file. Dako, you take that—"

"I can't read Japanese," she replied.

"Me, either," Jared quickly added.

Lupin placed a hand over his face and thought for a few moments before finally deciding that Jared would play lookout while Dako held the baby and he worked to hopefully find any more videos of his son.

"Hrm… This might be it—OW! Ow, ow, ow!" Lupin cursed at his own stupidity as a shelf full of videos crashed right onto his foot.

"Grandpa, are you okay?" Dako asked worriedly.

"Yeah… Grandpa's just getting old," Lupin muttered and rubbed his sore foot. As he did, one tape in particular caught his eye, and he lifted it up to get a better look at the tag. "…Hrm…"

"What? You found it?" Dako asked.

"No, but something just as interesting," Lupin shoved the tape into his jacket pocket as the sound of feet running down the tile hall. He quickly drug the producer into the room and stepped out with the children, with an angered looked upon his face.

"I don't know what kind of establishment you're trying to run, but there is a man drunk in that room!" Lupin shrieked at the security guards. "Drunk! In front of my children! How dare you! I ought to sue! It's a disaster in there!"

"S-sir, don't worry, we'll handle him," the guard said reassuringly.

"I would hope so!" Lupin murmured, and strode down the hall with a child at either side.

"…You rock, Grandpa," Dako smiled.

"I just like being related to you," Jared added with a smile.

Seattle:

"She'll be fine," Yukiko sighed and adjusted the pillows for her aching back.

"I hope you're right," Toshiro said quietly, glancing out the window at the rainy sight before him. "What a depressing day to have alone time…"

"Eh, it's not alone time if you count the sleeping baby."

"Which one?"

"Both," Yukiko looked over at the sleeping Namiko, who was soon awoken by the sound of the phone ringing. Yukiko gave a groan as the little girl awoke, and Toshiro sprung for the phone.

"Hello?"

"Toshiro?" on the other end was his mother-in-law, "I think I found what you've been looking for."

"Yeah? Well, are you sure?"

"It says government all over it… Well, what I can make out of it," Sakura responded with a tone of confusion in her voice.

"Make out of it? What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well… There's a lot of code here. Can you have your brother look at it?"

"They're all trying to find my kidnapped sister," Toshiro answered with a heave of a sigh.

"Do you want me to throw it out?"

"No. If they want it so bad there's got to be a reason for it."

"Toshiro…" Yukiko tugged upon his gi sleeve.

"Hrm?"

"You ain't gonna like it," Yukiko said with a gulp.

"Holy crap!" Toshiro slammed the phone down and rose as he noticed another figure looming in a shadow of the room.

"Well… Ain't this sweet?" Hector said with a wide smile as he looked over to Toshiro, and then to Yukiko.

"You stay away from her!" Toshiro shouted, and immediately pulled out his blades.

"It only take one a' us to get yo' sistah… What makes you think you be any challenge fo' me?" asked Hector with a smile beneath his mask.

"You know, I hate to break up the tea party, but I didn't even notice back of bones there," Yukiko growled. "What I meant is I think I just had a contraction."

"Aw hell no," Hector muttered, his eyes shooting open wide and taking a step back as Toshiro went to his wife's side.

"Isn't it too early?" Toshiro asked in a nervous whisper.

"I don't know! I don't know this sort of crap!" Yukiko said with a nervous break in her voice.

Toshiro then looked over his shoulder to Hector, who was attempting to once again fade into the shadows. "Aren't you a doctor? Didn't you mention that?"

"I… I'm a mortician!"

"You still went to med school," Yukiko huffed. "Now either you're completely evil, or you can give me… A hand…"

Hector paused a moment, gulped and set down his cane, "Why you trustin' me?"

"Because she's still got her gun on her and she could kill you faster than you could even glance at that baby evilly," Toshiro replied with a confident smirk.

"….Fine… Gimme some towels," Hector muttered. "Tony ain't gonna believe this."


	35. Cry like a Baby

DISCLAIMER: Heh, if I owned Lupin the Third, my car would have the rewiring it needs, don'tcha think?

Howdy and greetings,

Well, another chapter out, and I've noticed a similar question from a few friends and fans… Will there be a Lupin the Fifth series after this? Ummmm…. No definite word on it yet, but I won't say that there's no possibility at all of Lupin the Third's grandchildren, along with Jigen and Goemon's, to make their own appearance, even if it is for a shorter period of time. But I tell you now that there's no way that this'll continue to Lupin the Eighth, even if that was a real series. I'll go back and just do a bunch of _Scrapbook Memories_ if I have to. By the way, Lupin forum still up, as stated in the last post. And, if I don't see anyone around until after the 14th, happy Valentine's Day to all!

P.S.: Brey, it's good to have you back in the saddle again : )

Fun fact of Boredom: Tony and Hector are probably in more works than any other of my characters. They've been floating around for about five years now, and done everything from fight demons to get stopped by the Romanian border patrol to show up in stories that take place in New York, Chicago and Seattle and help out a superhero that's a mix between Joan of Arc and Sailor Moon. They're truly well-traveled men.

Chapter thirty-five: Cry Like a Baby

Seattle:

"Five days of nothing," Leo moaned and rubbed his eyes. "I don't believe this…"

"It'll be all right," Charley smiled and placed a hand on his arm. "I'm sure they know you're doing a good job!"

"She's an Asian woman with an extremely loud outfit and big chest who drives around in an Alfa Romeo… How in the hell does no one see her?"

"Maybe they do," Charley took a sip of her tea and bit into her tuna sandwich. The newspaper Leo had brought to read during lunch had somehow mysteriously vanished from the table.

"Hrm? What's that mean?"

"Well, you see a celebrity, you're star struck," Charley explained. "Just like I was when I first met you… A lot of people wouldn't turn in Lupin the Fourth because, well—She's Lupin!"

"I… I do kind of wonder why I get asked for my autograph sometimes," Leo admitted. "That's one way to look at it… But we're still no closer to catching her."

"Could… Could I ask you a kind of personal question?" Charley inquired hesitantly.

"Eh, depends on what it is," Leo replied with a relaxed smile.

"Why do you chase your sister around so much? I mean, you have your own family to look after now, so… Why not let her just worry about it?"

Leo gave a small sigh and looked down at his plate, "I'd like to wash my hands of Fuji sometimes, yeah, but worse comes to worse, she's always been there for me. She was the one who tracked me down when I went crazy, and she cared for me then… She's saved me dozens of times over the years, she loves her nephews and niece and…. She took the pressure off of me to be the next great thief."

"I don't understand," said Charley with a shake of the head.

"I figured not… I was pretty hazy with that, wasn't I? When I was in training to take my father's place, I was supposed to be the next one to carry on the traditions. The next great Lupin in a long line of them. When I left, Fuji took on that name. She took away part of the guilt I had for leaving my family behind. So I chase her around to make sure she doesn't get hurt or get in too much trouble… And we have an agreement. If I catch her, she finally settles down and starts her own family."

"Wow…" Charley muttered in awe. "I… I wish I could meet someone like you more often!"

"No, no you don't," Leo said with a small chuckle. "I'm not as nice a guy as I seem. I've also got a lot wrong… Well, up there. Don't tell, though, I don't want everyone to think I'm crazy, and I could lose my position chasing Fuji."

"I thought… I thought the crazier a cop you were, the better assignments you get."

"It's not like a movie," Leo said with a sip of tea. "Being crazy isn't fun… Or cool. Not being in control of yourself is one of the scariest things you could ever be put through. It's like hell. Ms. Kosai, are you okay? I'm sorry if I upset you… Please don't cry again!"

"I just… You're so kind," Charley whispered and set down her silverware. "My fiancé was so like you, it's frightening. I'm really jealous of Max, and if I didn't know you were a father of three, well—" She was cut off from the sounds of Leo choking upon his meal, and looked upward with great worry.

"Mr. Lupin!" Charley rose and ran around to the other side of the table and placed her hands about his waist and began to push until Leo finally spat out the bit of roast beef sandwich that had gone down the incorrect pipe. "Are you all right now?"

"Yeah… That was just… Unexpected," Leo admitted as he placed a hand on his throat. He stiffened as he felt a chin on his shoulder and glanced over at Charley. "I… Charley, I…"

"I'm sorry for everything, Ari," Charley said with a small sigh.

"Only my family can call me that, Inspector. I'd appreciate if you didn't," said Leo quietly with closed eyes. He pulled himself up from his chair and turned about to face her. "You… You'll meet someone really nice Charley, I promise. As good a person as you are—"

"I'm not though!" Charley cried. "Don't you get it! I'm—"

"I don't care," Leo answered. "I just… Let's just forget that happened, all right?"

"Leo…"

"Come on, let's go and look for Lupin," Leo said quietly, and patted her on the shoulder as he passed.

"Yeah… You got it," Charley rose quietly and followed Leo out the door, her head slightly hung and her eyes falling upon her necklace.

A different part of town:

"Um… Yeah, right now," Toshiro nodded and sputtered into the telephone. "I-I don't know why, either! I-I-I know it's early!"

"You wanna quit gabbin' a gimme a hand?" Hector growled. "OW! Quit hittin' mah head, woman!"

"You better take off that damn skull mask," Yukiko hissed to Hector. "I won't have my kid come out and have the crap scared out of her by Jack Skellington."

"You askin' the wrong person th' wrong questions, chere," Hector murmured.

"I wasn't 'askin''. I was demanding," Yukiko said with a growl. Hector's eyes narrowed reasonably, and moments later the skull mask was on the bed while Hector went back to work preparing Yukiko for the labor.

"That's a real skull," Toshiro said with horror in his voice. Hector turned to face Toshiro, and the samurai took a step back and frowned.

"Ya never seen a Cajun 'fore?" Hector's face reddened; he knew that Toshiro had been surprised by the scars running across his face.

"I… I'll go get some towels."

"Now there's showin' some sense, yeah."

Toshiro disappeared into the bathroom, and Yukiko gave a small wail and gripped onto the mattress, "Damn! This is worse than gettin' shot! Owww…. OW! Hey, watch your hands!"

"It all right… It gone' be fine with Hector," Hector said calmingly to her.

"Hey, Doc…"

"Yeh?"

"You're kinda cute," Yukiko said with a small smirk. "Don't tell my husband I said that."

Hector gave a small smile and nodded, "Ya got it…" he peeled off his long black coat and muttered a small phrase to himself in French, and gratefully took the towels that Toshiro returned with. "Now you jus' start them exercises…"

"What exercises?" Yukiko asked, followed by a yell of pain.

"Lamaze," Hector said with uncertainty now filling his voice. "Y'know… Breathin' exercises."

Toshiro bent down beside Yukiko and gripped onto her hand, kissing it briefly and trying to hide the fact that he had begun to shake lightly. The last time he had attempted to begin a family, it had ended in disaster, so while trying to think the most positive thoughts he could, he continually thought back to Julia, and the violent images that he had come home to that one evening.

Yukiko gave another shriek and threw her head back in pain, and Toshiro immediately placed a damp towel on her forehead.

"_Your brother's kind of cute," this was when he was still known as merely Goemon's little brother, and not his bastard son and the heir of the rat clan. She had been the first girl from the modern Japan_ _he had ever seen._

"'Kay… C'mon, c'mon… Yeh, yeh, yeh!" Hector shouted amongst Yukiko's crying.

"Damn it, I AM!" Yukiko shrieked. "Would you SHUT UP? It's not HELPING!"

"_I'll date you when you get a car," she told him with a joking smile. She wasn't smiling when he told her moments later that he'd only consider her when she actually developed a chest._

"Yeow!" Toshiro clenched his teeth together as Yukiko gripped onto it harder, and Hector said curses and other phrases that sounded like complete nonsense in an attempt to egg her on.

"_I love you, too," it had been difficult enough for her to admit, so he quickly filled in the blanks for her. It had been the best Christmas he had had since his first Christmas away from his grandmother, which had been the first he'd ever celebrated._

Toshiro's attention was drawn back to the current situation as Yukiko's crying joined another's, and it wasn't nearly at growling or gruff as Hector's voice. That only meant one thing.

"Shh, shh now," Hector said in a surprisingly calm tone. "Ya'll wanna say 'allo' heah?"

"Hi, Saiyuri," Yukiko said with a tired and quiet smile as she looked on at the new baby.

Across town:

"Come on, speed up!" Fuji shouted, followed by a long coughing fit.

Ryo grumbled, and looked around at the zooming traffic, "No way I'm going any faster."

Heiji stood up from the back seat, and tossed out what looked to be a disk shaped object. It hit the trunk of the car, like he had hoped, and he seated himself once again better Jordan and Ally, and quickly pulled out his laptop.

"I'm the boss, I say speed up!" Fuji demanded.

"I hate it when you get sick," Ryo muttered and floored the gas, and made a right turn sharp enough to nearly send the reasonably tiny Ally flying from the vehicle. Jordan quickly reached over and grabbed Jigen's shirt collar, all while keeping his concentration upon the Thunderbird in front of him.

Tony was having his own problems in the black vehicle, "Would you please stop?" he asked Odori, turning to the samurai who was working at kicking out her door, for both her feet and hands were bound. "That interior's probably worth more than that damn sword of yours! Listen, don't you guys get it! We're just trying to do our job here! Damn, I'm not gonna kill you. I promise."

"Why don't you just let Fuji buy you out?" Odori asked in a pant.

"It ain't that simple," Tony explained, briefly looking through his rearview. "The government's involved in this—Crap! They didn't tell me I had Goddamn Tonya Stewart on this team!"

"The government told you this?" asked Odori with a raised eyebrow. She had given off the appearance of being calmer, but in fact she had remembered the knife she kept stored in her gi pocket.

"Heh, just one guy in particular…" Tony answered.

"Do I know him?" asked Odori.

"Not my place to tell."

"That certainly isn't polite to do to a woman."

"He said you're more demon than woman… I had no idea if he was being literal or not at first, but I'm starting to wonder," Tony muttered, and exited into a construction site, much to Ryo's dismay.

"Ryo-san, how are you going to—WHAA!" Fuji shrieked as Ryo cleared a pit in the construction site and sent the unsuspecting Lupin flying out of her seat briefly and then causing her to kiss the floorboards of the old car, her legs still up in the air. "Oh, my cough drops! I lost this months ago! I can use these!"

"Get serious," Ryo muttered and pulled Fuji up onto the seat and pressed harder upon the gas. Ryo then watched in shock as the car turned about and began to zoom toward her. Ryo managed to swerve out of the way in time, but not without ramming into a forest of size-five Poland imported rebar, making it unlikely that the car would be making any more movement anytime soon. Tony's car didn't stop there, however. It shrieked and spun until it ran into a large stack of bricks, which tumbled onto the dash of the car.

"Oh my God! Odori!" Heiji yelled as he followed the already bolting Jordan out of the car and began to search through the bricks. Jordan pulled out the tiny frame of the samurai, and gave a sigh of relief as she began to cough. She was caked in white residue from the bricks that had managed to bust through the windshield.

"Get the man, too," Odori choked.

"What? Are you crazy?" Heiji yelped.

"He protected me from the blow," Odori explained. Heiji paused a moment, then nodded over to Ally, and the two pulled Tony out of the remnants of the car and Ally revived the surprised assassin.

"WOAH!" Tony sat up and wiped his mouth and spit at the ground. "Do I look like that kind of a guy? Do you see me in heels or somethin'?"

"Relax, I'm not going to buy you flowers or anything," Ally grumbled and rose. "For Christ's sakes, I'm a hockey player, not a football player!"

"Are you okay?" Jordan asked Odori quietly as he laid her down on the ground and examined what looked to be a sprained wrist.

"I've been better," Odori answered quickly, followed by a hiss of pain as Jordan rotated her wrist. "I will just put it on some ice."

"Come on," Ally lifted Tony up and walked him over to a pile of construction material, and sat him upon one of the boxes. "You're lucky I'm training for the Olympics right now… You weigh a ton for a shorter guy!"

"Crap, that's right, you're left wing for the Blackhawks, right?"

"You follow hockey?"

"Hell, yeah. I spent three years in Chicago!" Tony gave a small laugh, and clutched onto his chest in pain. "Yeow… Damn, I think I broke somethin', man."

"Well, maybe your amigo can look at it. Apparently he just delivered a baby," Fuji said as she hung up her cell phone and stepped over to Tony quickly popping one of the cough drops and inspecting the package label before it disappeared into her jacket.

"He… He what? Hector? Oh, that's funny," Tony said with a smile. "You serious? Hector. He's a mortician. He doesn't even know the right way to hold a babydoll, much less a baby."

"You're an auntie, Ryo-san!" Fuji said hoarsely.

"Yu—Yuki had her?" Ryo gulped and blinked, and then looked to Ally.

"I think this calls for a… A party, I guess," Ally said with a mutter.

Fuji turned to Tony and chuckled, "Only if Mister Perry agrees to let me buy him out… And Dori-chan and Jordan-chan agree to make-up…. And Ally-chan makes me soup when we get home."

"Shoot… I'm so sick of you all I'm to the point where I'd rather kill myself," Tony said tiredly. "Too damn many of you all… Might as well make a profit. No wonder your brother can't catch you. Although he puts up a hell of a fight… Got past me an' Hec and then picked up that woman and—"

"Woman?" Ryo repeated with a frown.

"That reporter," Fuji explained.

"Reporter? Nah, can't be the same," Tony shook his head. "He was callin' her 'Inspector'."

"Wha… Now that just doesn't add up," Fuji said with a frown. "Unless… Oh my GOD!... Ugh, Ari's never had it easy."

"Listen, I'd love to hear _alllll_ about that, but I think I've got some internal bleeding going on," Tony said, clutching on to his stomach tighter.

"Called a cab," Heiji announced. "Well, a couple… I refuse to pay faire, though."

"I'm buying drinks!" Fuji shouted.

"Yeah, but will you be able to drink them?" Ryo wondered with a raised eyebrow as Fuji went into another coughing fit.

Later:

"Wow, no way to celebrate the birth of a new baby than buying two cases of rum…" Yukiko said with a roll of the eyes.

"Ya'll never lived 'til you had some North Carolina moonshine," said Hector with a smirk as he adjusted his mask and toasted to the new parents.

"Uh-uh… Yeah, feeling a little better… Yes, I'm staying away from the baby… Okay, thanks, Dad," Fuji muttered and hung up her cell phone. "Heiji-chan, take a look at your computer… Dad says you've got mail."

Heiji gave a nod and opened the laptop and accessed his mail, taking another sip from the bottle as he waited for it to download.

"I never could understand how some people like that mess," Hector muttered, and turned to Tony. "It 'bout time we leave?"

"Yeah, the sooner we leave, the sooner we can dodge the cops who are inevitably on our asses now," Tony muttered, finished downing his sip and rose, picking up his mask at the table.

"Hey! ….Wow…." Heiji's jaw fell, and he scanned over the page, not quite sure what to make out.

"What's up? Bad?" Fuji asked.

"Bad," Heiji nodded. "Try a directory of big names in the underworld… Not discluding Jordan Lupin, Hector DeLeon or Tony Perry… Heh, so that's what you look like without the mask, Hector? Oh, instructional video!"

"What!" Hector, as well as the rest of the group, scurried over to the laptop, and watched the video that Lupin had sent his future son-in-law.

"And through this tracking process, in coming years, we will be able to quickly and quietly take care of these problems that arise," explained the stern faced security charge. "Perhaps this will even eventually lead to the ability for our bigger businesses to track their potential customers' thoughts, or even help our security officers in later years prevent potential threats.

"This is friggin' Orwell watchdog crap!" Fuji choked.

"Not much different from what's going on with your brother…" Heiji murmured. "F-Fuji, what are you doing?"

"Grabbing Yukiko's gun," Fuji answered calmly, checking the revolver of the weapon, loading it and stuffing an extra pack of bullets in her jacket, right beside the cough drops.

"You're going to kill someone?" Ryo choked.

"Nope, just scaring," Fuji replied.

"Isn't anyone going to stop her? Dori, where's Dori?" Heiji looked about the room to see both her and Jordan absent from the festivities.

"On the roof," Ryo replied. "Fuji, wait!"

"No one gets into my personal affairs, or my brother's," Fuji grumbled and stormed out.

"….Weird…" Yukiko murmured, and rocked her child gently back and forth. "What do you think got her in all a twist?"

"I don't think she wants the same things happened to Ari that happened to her…. That, or she's had way too much cough syrup. These people know everything. I don't know how, but they do," Heiji whispered as he opened another screen and read over the information from the disk, which Yukiko's mother had forwarded to him. On the screen, under Fuji's profile, it showed not one, but three instances of a miscarriage, as well as one dissolved marriage. He quickly exited out of this screen before anyone could catch this information, however.

Fuji, meanwhile, hopped into the rent-a-car, gun at her side, and began to search around the rainy Seattle streets for the one person who was out catching her.

And from the rooftop Odori and Jordan watched her take off as both sat in the cover of a set of patio furniture one of the regulars had set up for the rare rainy days.

"Dori…"

"No, I pushed you," Odori held up her hand and sighed. "It was wrong of me. I jumped into wanting a relationship because it has been so long since I've been in one."

"I can still be your friend though," Jordan said with a hopeful smile, laying a hand atop hers. Odori pulled away from him and looked downward at the concrete below.

"I'm not sure if I could handle something like just friendship," Odori admitted, and hung her head.

Jordan blinked a few times in surprise and reached forward to place a comforting hand on her shaking shoulders, but she stood and quickly repelled from any contact with him.

"Damn it, I can't be your friend if I'm in love with you! I did that once, I couldn't take doing that again! I'd rather kill myself than go through all of that again!" Odori shouted. "Just go, Jordan! Just go and make someone happy, please!"

"…Fine," he rose and grabbed his jacket, and faced her, with a frown upon his face. He bent downward and kissed her, leaving a stunned Odori behind as he climbed down the steps and disappeared.

"I just couldn't do that again," Odori murmured.

Across town:

"Eh, you sure you saw them go in here?" Leo loosened his tie and gulped at the foreboding neon sign that he and Charley stood in front of.

"Sure! Two guys in that much black leather in daylight? What else could it be?" asked Charley with a laugh and a smile.

"A biker club… A lot worse than a biker club…. Hey, um, I know you were engaged, but did you ever… I mean, do you know about stuff like—"

"Come on, it's worth checking out," Charley took him by the hand and led him into the club, nearly knocking him down as she pulled him into the darkened building.

"Remind me why we're doing this?" Tony asked Hector from inside the car.

"It all a matter 'a pride," Hector answered. "If she just gon' scare her for scarin's sake, that ain't gonna get nothin' done, right? So we 'talk' to her. Plus we still gettin' paid to do it all!"

"Remind me, if I ever have a kid, to let you nowhere near it," Tony made another turn and spotted Leo and Charley walking into the club. "Umm… Hec…. Are we sure that the money's this good?" Tony pointed up the sign, and Hector blinked a few times at the flashing yellow and pink. "That's a French word, ain't it? What's it mean?"

"I ain't sayin' cause I'mma gentleman," Hector answered.

"Aw, it is…. Aw, no…" Tony gave a laugh and placed his hand over his eyes. "How about after this we agree to never do government work again, all right?"

"Ya got it," Hector nodded, and clutched on tightly to his cane as he saw Fuji speed past them. "No wonder she get another to do th' drivin'."

"I'll call her, you go in and get that bitch," Tony announced as he pulled out his cell phone.

"What! Why me!"

"'Cause you do better with freaks," Tony answered. The Cajun rolled his eyes, stepped out, and walked into the club, and was immediately approached by a feminine looking male… Or vice versa… In mainly black and heavy makeup.

"Hey, what's your game, eh?" s/he asked with a smile.

"Today it's tryin' not to kill you kinna folks," Hector drew out his sword and held it up to the youth's neck, and pushed a few other similar looking people out of the way. "This shouldn't be too hard… It only 'bout two hundred people… They gonna clear out real soon and nice, yeah."

"THEY'RE IN A WHAT?" Fuji shrieked, and Tony gave a shudder, and moved the phone away from his ear.

"Yeah, I know… I sent Hector in. Hopefully he hasn't killed anyone yet," Tony muttered and glanced at the sign with a French obscenity and two flashing letters beneath it.

"I'll be right there. She better not have done anything to my brother!" Fuji growled and slammed down the phone.

"Damn glad it's that tech nerd and not me havin' to put up with her," Tony muttered and watched as she zoomed back to the site and ran out of her car.

"Let's hit it," Fuji ran into the club, her gun hidden and Tony following behind. Not like this would scare the already terrified patrons, however. Hector had already left his mark upon the establishment, and threw another chair out of the way and glanced about the room. "…Where'd you find him?"

"A bar in Texas. He was singing _Mandy_," Tony answered. "Hey, are you sure you're good enough to…"

"I'm fine. Never friggin' better. Let's just find him."

"Oh my God!" Charley hissed and drew Leo into a private room as she caught site of Hector. "He's going to kill us!"

"What? Inspector, just get your gun! He's one guy!" Leo laughed, and then heard a chair slam against the closed door. "A very scary guy… But just one guy!"

"I should've never taken this job!" Charley cried. "I… I… I'm going into a panic attack… Oh my God, I… I can't breathe!"

"Charley," Leo kneeled down to Charley's level, for she had curled herself into a small ball with her hands over her face. "Listen, we can take him! You're the best in—"

"No I'm not!" Charley shrieked. "There is no Charley Kosai! My name's Charley Kobayashi, I'm doing a undercover investigative report on you!"

"…Wha….? Oh, oh my God… I… I can't breath…." Leo hit the ground and placed a hand on his neck. "Inhaler… Quick!"

Charley nodded and passed him his inhaler, and Leo took a few deep breaths before laying down on the floor. "Are you better now?"

"No!" Leo sat up and took Charley by the shoulders. "Has the show been aired yet?"

"Yeah… Actually six episodes… It's… It's like a nightly thing," Charley answered sheepishly.

"At… At least not in France, right?"

"If you don't have satellite. I'm with Nippon TV."

"That crap channel?" Leo choked. "I'm Fox material!"

"Someone get this deranged hillbilly out of here!" a voice from the outside shrieked.

"We're going to have to think of something to get him off of our tales," Charley said worried, drawing back the frightened tears she had been shedding since she had run into the room.

"Um… Relax…" Leo looked about the room and shuddered at the pure sleaziness of it. "Okay, idea!" he pulled off his jacket and then his tie, and threw Charley down to the floor.

"OW! What! I thought you were gay!"

"That's…. A gray area…" Leo cleared his throat. "You see, I'm in love with a man, but—It doesn't matter, just go along with it!"

"O-okay," Charley sputtered and placed her arms about Leo's neck as he bent in and kissed her.

"Now let's try this one!" Hector kicked open yet another door, and sent yet another couple running for their lives.

"Wow… I thought this gun would make me scary, but they're all running from him… I thought sad goth people liked _The Nightmare Before Christmas_…" Fuji said with confusion.

"Yeah, but not when he's got a sword," Tony answered, following calmly behind his partner. Hector opened one door, glanced at the couple in there a moment, and shook his head in disgust. Tony continued down the line, but Fuji stopped, and gaped at the sight.

"A-Ari?" she squeaked.

Leo looked up, and lost all of the color in his face. He sat up so quickly he didn't realize he was sitting on Charley until she delivered a swift punch to his shoulder.

"I… This isn't what it looks like," Leo buttoned his shirt and rose, and helped Charley to rise off of the ground.

"What the hell?" Fuji blinked and looked Leo up and down, too stunned to do what she had originally intended to do to Charley.

"There she is…" Tony said as he walked back into the room. Hector stepped in, over the mess he had made, and grabbed onto one of her hands roughly.

'"We'll show you what you get when you play with fire, yeah," Hector muttered.

"Wait! Fuji, you're going to let them take her?" Leo shrieked.

"Yeah, yeah I am," Fuji replied with a crazed nod. "Do you have any idea who she is?"

"Yeah, Charley Kobayashi," Leo sighed. "Television news anchor."

"That, and we're thinking a government spy," Fuji continued.

"What!" Leo and Charley yelped in unison.

"I… I'm a lot of things, b-but I'm not a spy!" Charley yelped. "Could you please let go? You're hurting me!"

"Listen, Mister…. Creepy skeleton man…" Leo began. "I believe her…"

"Well good for you," Hector snapped.

Leo paused and moment, began to turn his back, but quickly turned around and knocked Hector's feet from underneath him. He then grabbed onto Charley and pulled her out of the club. "Come on, let's go! They look like they want to kill you! Charley, what'd you do!"

"I didn't do anything with the government, I swear!"

"Well, you lied about a lot of other things apparently," Leo said quietly, ducking into an alley and holding onto her until he saw the two assassins leave, and then watched as Fuji stood outside of the club and pulled out her cell phone. Apparently it was not a very good call, for she slammed her phone and stormed off to her car, the appearance of a rainfall not helping her in the least.

"Looks like we're safe now," Charley said in a low voice.

"Here," Leo pulled off his jacket and then placed it over Charley's shoulders as they stepped out of the alley. "Guess we can't go back to the hotel… I'm thinking Fuji's in the kind of mood where she'll start shooting and ask questions later."

"What… Why are you being so nice to me? I mean, I…"

"You're a lady, and I treat you with respect…" Leo shoved his hands in his pockets and looked downward at the ground. "…What am I going to tell Max? How am I going to explain everything to Fuji?"

"Well, I…" Charley bit her lip and drew the purple blazer around her shoulders tighter. "Could we go somewhere warmer? I think I have an idea… I'll start my very long apology by buying you coffee, Mr. Lupin."

"That sounds good," Leo nodded, and followed her into a nearby coffee shop.

Later:

"So, that's why you did it?" Leo finished his second cup and then finished his doughnut.

"It was that or lose my job," Charley said quietly. "I never got into this job to hurt people, really. I'm starting to think I would've been better off going into nursing, like my mother wanted me to."

"Well, it seems like you got into the whole thing to help people, so maybe it's not too late…"

"Oh, like use my powers for good, like a superhero… Or how you did, right?"

"Um, well, yeah," Leo rose and looked out at the still raining and now darkened city in front of them. "We'll think of a plan tonight. We should find somewhere to stay until then."

"I'll pay."

"No, you don't have to. Really… You know better than anyone what kind of a family I come from, so you should know that money isn't an issue."

"It's part of my making up for everything I did," Charley answered, and quickly spied a man selling umbrellas outside in a small kiosk. She ran out and returned with an umbrella, which, much to Leo's dismay, wore the smiling face of Mankii-chan upon it. He gave a roll of the eyes and stepped out into the rainy night, holding in umbrella for Charley, which he was taught was the most polite thing to do.

"You were raised in France, weren't you?" Charley asked with a chuckle.

"What, did you get that from out interview, too?"

"It's just that," Charley chuckled and put a hand to her mouth, "that sharing an umbrella is a form of affection in Japan."

"….I just knew I should've spent more summers over there," a red-faced Leo sighed. "Is this hotel all right?"

"It's perfect," Charley smiled and stepped in, not noting Leo's concerned expression at the familiar yellow car parked out front.

"It can't be the Romeo… That thing's pink… And Fuji was driving a gray car…" Leo muttered as he placed who it might below to.

Jordan, meanwhile, nearly fell off of his stool in the bar as he saw his half-brother walk into the hotel with the attractive woman close at his side, "….He's cheating? With that reporter? Oh, the fun never stops…"

"Leo?" Charley returned with the hotel key and looked down at the shiny metal nervously.

"What's up?" Leo looked about the hotel to see if there was anyone he knew, and breathed a false sigh of relief, not realizing that Jordan was hidden behind a beam in the bar, or that Jordan was currently pulling on a mask and dosing himself with the rest of his alcohol.

Charley reached up on her toes and kissed Leo briefly, and smiled, "Thanks again… I meant what I said, about if you weren't a father."

"Well, I, urm…" Leo loosened his tie and walked up the stairs to the first floor of the hotel. "It's probably all of the coffee talking, ehehe…."

"'Scuse me, buddy… You here with yer wife…? hic…" a drunkard rested his arms upon Leo's shoulders and smiled widely at him. "She's real pretty…"

"Yeah, so stay away from her," Leo said in a rare showing of his spine.

"You got it, Buddy," Jordan patted Leo on the back, and stumbled off and purposefully falling down the flight of stairs which he had run up. "Ouch… I think I broke my ass bone!"

"…That was weird…" Charley said in a whisper.

"Well, strange people aren't a new thing here. This is where Nirvana came from," Leo scratched the back of his neck, barely missing the tracking device Jordan had tagged him with before his tumble. Charley gave a solemn nod, and the two continued up another flight of stairs to their room.

Jordan had retreated to his room, and was listening intently to the duo when his cell phone rang. He cringed, half-expecting it to be Odori, and frowned as he watched Fuji's phone number pop up.

"Hello? I'm a little busy here…"

"Switching from one girl to the next so soon? Tsk, tsk… Poor Dori-chan…" Fuji said in her hoarse tone.

"Shut up… I'm listening to Ari, for your information. I think he and that reporter are a little more than just buddies."

"Really, now? You'll have to keep me updated on that one. I'd hate to knock the crap out of my brother for acting stupid once again, but I'd do it in a heartbeat."

"You're just looking for an excuse to beat up on him… Hurry up and talk, they're starting to talk, too."

"Heiji managed to trace back those files."

"Aaaandddd?"

"They originated from Interpol," Fuji explained. "They were running some underground database, and their ultimate goal is to get rid of 'problems' like you, me… Even dad and Avery!"

"Woah, wait, a baby?"

"They're taking no chances here. Don't got thinking it's the whole agency… This is one specific branch. I'm not even sure if most of the main players of the ICPO are aware of its existence."

"So Interpol's had a plan to kill us."

"Bingo," Fuji replied. "I sent a few available friends to go lead out the head honcho of this operation, and Heiji's setting up a live TV feed to it, to catch him in the act."

"And let me guess. You're going to let Odori loose on me and I'm going to be the decoy."

"Not exactly. I need you to bring 'Inspector Kosai' to the airport, and get her on the next flight out. These guys are meeting with their boss in the early morning."

"How do you know all this?"

"Zenigata-sama…" Fuji replied innocently. "A little slip here, a little begging here… And the old man pulled the strings like he was tuning a violin."

"You just mixed a metaphor with a simile, you realize that, right?"

"…How'd you know I was drinking…?"

"N-nevermind. I'll have them on the first flight out of here and to U.S. ICPO headquarters, but you owe me… Hey, how'd you know that I knew where they were, Fuji? Fuji? Hello? Damn it…" he hung up his phone, tossed aside his earpiece and after a little flirting with the hotel clerk he was able to find out exactly what room Charley and Leo were located.

"Room service," Jordan jiggled opened door and gaped as he made out the two figures in the darkened room. Leo pulled away from Charley, and the two shared a moment of silence as Charley backed away from the person she had kissed only moments before and busied herself about the room.

"…Fuji needs you," said Jordan in his regular voice, dropping the heavy accent he had used when posing as room service. "She, um, needs you on the first flight out of here."

"Yeah," Leo nodded and finished buttoning his shirt, and winced as Jordan slowly closed the door behind them.

The following day in Paris:

"Hey! Aw, crap!" Dako hit the cable box and plopped back on the couch, frustrated with the sudden static on the television screen.

"Don't curse!" Max called from the kitchen, walking out wearing a Mankii-chan apron and with a bowl of biscuit mix under one arm and Avery underneath the other. "And you two are grounded, so you shouldn't be watching television anyway! You know your punishment… Pick a language book from your Papa's collection and memorize the numbers one to a hundred from in that language."

"Ichi, ni, san, yon, go, ryo," Jared began.

"Sept, huit, neuf, dix, onze, douze," Dako finished, and seated herself beside her brother. The phone began to ring, and Max heaved a sigh and ran back into the kitchen to answer it.

"Hey, Aunt Fuji!" Dako shouted as Fuji's image appeared on the television.

"Hello!" Fuji waved to the camera and smiled widely, "This thing on? Okay, cool… Well, we've got a very special presentation this morning from Nippon Japan Television's Charley Kobayashi… Since Ms. Kobayashi isn't the most fluent in English, the report will be translated by Interpol Inspector Leonard Lupin!"

"Yeah, yeah… Okay, Mom, channel…" Max did not have time to finish his sentence. As he saw Leo's image on the television, next to the reporter, he dropped the telephone into the batter and stood with his mouth ajar. Avery reached over, dug out a handful of the batter, and smashed it first on himself and then over Max's chest.

"Charley Kobayashi reporting in what appears to be the biggest government scandal since Watergate," Leo translated for the young woman who stood on the sidewalk out front of the Interpol offices. There were several men in suits in the background being drug away screaming and shouting obscenities, while Charley attempted to not appear nervous in front of the camera.

"Woah, look, a guy with a skull mask, and a guy dressed like a ninja!" Jared pointed to Hector and Tony, who in the background stepped into their car quietly after politely refusing a good-sized envelope from a surprised Fuji.

"Shut it!" Dako hissed, slapping Jared on the shoulder.

"Wow… Leo really landed it…" Max muttered, and seated himself beside the children, his face still stone with shock. Avery continued to play with the batter, smiled and threw a large clump of the dough at Jared, who paid no attention to this.

Valentine's Day, New York:

"So we're not going?" Toshiro rocked back and forth in the chair with the baby sleeping in his arms while Yukiko gave a small nod from the bed.

"Maybe if I'm feeling up to it by then… He's not playing for four days," Yukiko rolled over and yawned. "That plane ride took it out of me… Could you imagine trying to fly to Spain? With a newborn?"

"We'll just watch it on the television, worse comes to worse… I know Fuji was understanding to our situation, but I still think she's upset we won't be there to help her out with it."

"Yeah, and…. I think she's kinda jealous, too," Yukiko said with a small sigh, and reached over and stroked her daughter's hair gently. "She's an airhead, but she loves kids. Am I crazy or do I think she wants one of her own?"

"There's always adoption," Toshiro said with a small sigh, and rose and placed the baby in her crib. He then walked over to Yukiko and lied down beside her. "Happy Valentine's Day, Yuki…"

"…Damn, after her crying all night, I'm not even really feeling like doing it anymore, are you?"

"For once in my life, not really," Toshiro answered with a small sigh. "I think I'm genuinely getting old. I don't even think I can get my pants off right now."

"Wow, that's a first from you, too," Yukiko chuckled, and nudged him. "Eh, we'll make up for it next year."

"Double?"

"I can't even think about double right now," Yukiko moaned and then laughed. "Unless it's a double scoop of ice cream. Now go to sleep."

"Yes, ma'am…"


	36. Willing to Forgive

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Lupin the Third, but I have discovered through personal experience that an E-Harmony survey indeed does have standards.

Sooner update as promised, WOO!

That's mainly because it's yet another dateless Friday, but unlike all of the other ones, my friggin' car decided to commit suicide in the friggin' parking lot so now I'm pretty much stranded… Oh, well, at least the reason it almost caught on fire wasn't because of anything I did… Okay, note here. This arc takes place during _a _winter Olympics, but not _the _winter Olympics. Because while I'll more than likely neglect anything and everything to watch the hockey game (sleep, family, etc) this chapter may come out before the results… So let's just play along and pretend that it's a different Olympics in a different Italy. Thanks! Oh, and abelated happy Valentine's Day to all… And to those with someone with someone on Valentine's Day… You don't need my thanks, you… you… People with lives! Hmph.

P.S.: Dedicated to Shelby, born February 14, 2006. Welcome to the world, hon.

Fun fact of Boredom: Jared isn't named after _that _Jared, _Rick…. _His name was actually chosen by one of my readers, Yuki.

Chapter thirty-six: Willing to Forgive

Spain:

"Eh, still fresh…" Ally murmured and placed on foot on the ice. "Some guy must've cleaned it up this morning… Guess I'll just have to get used to the slick feeling in Italy…" he propelled himself off of the wall and did a wide circle and skated about smoothly, looking upward at the white lights shining back down upon him. "And Capone and the U.S. team win the gold…" he muttered as he fell back against the wall of the rink and sighed.

"What, stopping here to try to avoid your girlfriend?" another figure skated onto the ice and joined Ally. Fuji was bundled down in a heavy jacket, cap and scarf, but was still graceful upon the ice.

"Maybe a little," Ally murmured. "That or I just want to practice a bit before all of the press, and I've got friends here."

"You don't say…"

"Hey, don't you have Heiji to bother? I don't want to sound rude, but I at least want to get some practice shots in here."

"He's… We're not really talking…."

Ally slowed his skating, finally came to a halt, and leaned against the rail of the rink, "Why do I have the feeling I'm going to have to listen?"

Fuji gave a deep sigh and hung her head, "Yukiko and Toshiro are busy with the baby, Ryo's off doing… Whatever Ryo does… Heiji's ignoring me and Dori's mourning."

"So I'm the only one left, eh?" Ally gave a small smirk and watched as Fuji gently hit the back of the rail and stood beside him, looking onward. "Well, what do you want to talk about? What'd you do to make Heiji mad at you now?"

"Right now, breathing," Fuji folded her arms and rubbed them together in hopes to achieve some warmth. "But… It started because I never told him that…. You ever do something really stupid that you regretted?"

"….You're seriously asking me that?"

"Okay, okay… So I know you have… Well, I kinda did one of those things a long time ago… I was a young, stupid kid, and I kinda got carried away and… Long story short, I ended up pregnant. So I tried to marry the guy, but it all fell apart after he went off and did his own thing and I had problems with the baby."

"…So you've been pregnant before?"

"Twice. The second time it was just some guy I met at a ski lodge."

"Jesus, Fuji, why didn't anyone know?"

"So my dad wouldn't go on a killing spree," Fuji answered with a roll of the eyes. "I just didn't think it was important. I'm 'live for the day', and that crap's all behind me! I just want to forget it, but… I guess it's like what happened with your dad. It's all coming back and biting me in my ass."

"Hey, it'll work out," Ally reassured her, and smiled. "C'mon, you want to help me practice?"

"Yeah, because I know so very much about hockey…"

"Just shoot me some pucks… It's like golf. And hit them as hard as you can. It'll help you with your aggression."

"If I had aggression, I'm sure it would."

"I'm not sure if you're aware of this, but you have denial issues, too."

"Where's the damn stick?" Fuji asked with a sigh, propelling herself off of the ice, toward the exit, where Ally had his equipment set up.

Paris:

"Okay… Kids at the theme park… Parents definitely won't call… Phone's off the hook, dinner's cooking…" Max thought aloud to himself as he walked through the rooms of the house, making sure everything was in order. "I think I actually have everything set… Hehehe.. He won't even see the best Valentine's Day in his life coming!" Max stopped in the living room as he heard the door open, and smiled.

Leo wasn't sure exactly how to make eye contact with Max as he entered the home and set his suitcase by the front door. He then slipped off his coat, tossed his shoes beside Max's, and trudged into the living room, where he promptly felt hands on his shoulders.

"Flight late? It's almost midnight!"

"Where're the kids?" Leo asked, turning about to face Max.

"They're with your parents for the weekend," Max smiled and leaned upward to kiss Leo briefly. "I told Fujiko I'd pay her back by driving her and your dad when they leave for their cruise."

"…How long have you been planning this, exactly?"

"Let's just say I would have cried if you had had a delayed flight," Max responded with a small laugh, leading Leo over to the couch and sitting beside him.

"The house looks great…" Leo murmured and let his eyes fall upon the fireplace, although he could feel Max staring at him. "You must've worked your ass off here."

"Eh, not so bad… Not as bad as when my dad made me clean out our basement," Max's smile fell, and he placed a hand on Leo's shoulder. "Hey, you okay?"

"Yeah… I just feel like crap that you went through all of this trouble for me and I couldn't even pick you up flowers or something."

"Flowers? I'm gay, not a woman," Max snorted. "I don't need them, trust me. They'll just wilt, anyway, and I hate watching something die like that."

"I'll make it up to you later," Leo sighed and bent his head downward.

"Hey… What's wrong?" asked Max quietly. "Something happen while you were going after your sister?"

"When _doesn't_ something happen?" Leo muttered and rested against the back of the couch. "I'm just tired from jet lag, is all."

"So… Will you be too tired for…"

"No, no, I'm fine for that…. With all of the work you went through, you deserve it," Leo said to a worried Max. "Besides, you look like you'd cry if I said no."

"I probably would," Max laughed, and switched off a nearby light.

'_How in the hell am I supposed to tell you?' _Leo wondered.

Italy, the following day:

"Winner take all?" Ryo smiled and glanced at her orange race car. Victor looked down to his black vehicle, and nodded. "And no arguments about it?"

"No arguments," Victor sighed and fixed his helmet upon his head and hopped into the racecar. Ryo smiled and climbed into her own car. Fuji was sitting in the empty stands, watching from afar.

"Who do you think'll win this?" Ally inquired, seating himself beside Fuji.

"Who else? Ryo-san," Fuji shrugged and leaned back against the plastic chair and smiled. "She'll kick his ass from here to the Vatican and back! So tell me—Odori still acting weird?"

"Like you wouldn't believe," Ally murmured and sighed. The racecars quickly took off and tore down the track, while Fuji and Ally looked onward. "So, you ready to tell me exactly who you were married to?"

"It doesn't take a lot of guessing, Ally—GO RYO-SAN!" Fuji shrieked, followed by a whistle.

"So that's the real reason why your brother isn't a Jurgis fan," Ally murmured.

"Nope. Hates the guy like he hates visiting his father-in-law," Fuji answered.

"Hpm… Speaking of them, they're both out of the country right now, so better time than none to get a little job out of the way… Although I'm pretty sure you were thinking the exact same thing."

"You betcha," Fuji nodded. "You know that there's another name for Torino, right?"

"Yeah, Turin and…. Oh my God, you're not serious!"

"You bet I am," Fuji rose and smiled, clasping her hands together. "The Shroud of Turin!"

"Hey, look!" Ally shouted and pointed to the race track, where Ryo zoomed past Victor then halted to a stop. She pulled herself out of the still hot car and ran over to Victor's parked vehicle.

"HA! I win! You get me the cars!" Ryo said with a smile, punching her husband in the arm roughly. "Two European cars of my choosing! Get me American and we're through, though."

"Heh, you don't have to rub it in…" Victor muttered and rubbed the now sore spot upon his shoulder.

"Don't feel bad…You'll still get a parting gift," said Ryo with a sly smile.

"Let me puke now," Fuji muttered with a roll of the eyes.

Paris:

"Are you sure there's nothing wrong?" Max asked with true concern in his voice.

"Yeah," Leo sat up in bed and pulled on his shirt. "Hey, I forgot some things at the office…"

"At two in the morning?" Max asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yeah…. Listen, I really need it," Leo said as he continued by pulling on his jacket. "I'll be back soon, I promise."

"Okay…. You want me to wait up, or…?"

"I'll be fine. I'm a big boy, I can fend for myself," Leo answered lightly, and headed out of his home and into the car, all the way to his father's house.

"Ari?" Fujiko answered the door with a yawn; Leo tried to hide his cringe when she opened the door in curlers and facial cream. "It's two thirty in the morning!"

"Could we take a drive?"

"Huh? What?" Fujiko blinked a few times, attempting to register this in her tired brain. "But, I… It's…"

"Mom, please? I really need to talk with someone."

Fujiko gave a slow, lazy nod. "Lemme just get my coat on and lie to your father… Jeeze, I can remember getting out of the house just by telling him I needed 'girl things', and he'd immediately shut up… Now it's 'to get diapers for my grandson'…."

"I really like it when you think back to the good old days, Mom, but I'm kinda cold here."

"Go wait in the car, I'll be right there," Fujiko waved him off and closed the door. By the time Leo had walked the length of the driveway, cleaned out the passenger seat from babys' toys, girls' makeup, boys' comic books and men's old fast food boxes, Fujiko walked out in a heavy coat, still tired looking.

"What's going on? Is everything okay with…. No one's sick, are they!"

"Mom, relax… It's nothing like that," Leo sighed and pulled out of the driveway, and began to drive down the country roads.

"What's wrong, then? Are you two fighting?"

"No… Not yet… You know how Dad always said Max would probably be the one to cheat on me?"

"…That little blond son of a bitch, why I ought to—"

"—Dad was wrong, Mom," Leo continued quickly.

"Ari… Did you…"

"It wasn't anything too bad, but I still talk to her."

"Her? A woman?"

"Yeah, I know… She was my partner a little while back. I don't know what to do, Mom. Max is asking how my trip was, and I can't exactly tell him everything."

"Then don't," Fujiko shrugged.

"What? I can't do that?"

"Well, your father never told me he had cheated…"

"Yeah, but that came out!"

"But I never told him I cheated, either…"

Leo's brakes came to a screeching halt and he slowly turned his head to face his mother, "When was this, Mom?"

"A little while back… You and Fuji were still very young," Fujiko sighed. "It's in the past, though. We've all got our skeletons, is the thing, and some things just shouldn't be brought up. Sure it'd be the right thing to do, if you think in terms of black and white, but if it's over and she's not pregnant or anything what harm would there be in keeping it a secret from him?"

"…I guess you're right."

"Of course I am," Fujiko leaned in and kissed him on the forehead. "See? No harm, to fowl."

Across town:

"….You don't look like Leo," said Max suspiciously.

"Well, a lot of us don't," Charely chuckled and shrugged. "I just wanted to stop by and give him a little something."

"Yeah?"

"Here," Charely removed the necklace from about her neck and passed it to Max. "Tell him thank you…. For everything. Well, better get back to Japan now! Just wanted to say hi."

"Um, sure," Max looked down at the necklace, and watched in confusion as Charely hopped off of the porch and into her rental car. "….She came all the way… From Japan? They're such a family of weirdoes!"

The phone began to ring, and Max sighed and turned back into the house, nearly taking a dive toward the ground as his foot made contact with one of Avery's toys, "Damn it… They know where the playroom is… Hello? Lupin residence."

"Inspector Zenigata?" the familiar voice of he chief resounded on the other end of the line.

"Um… Chief!" Zenigata yelped. "H-How're things? How's the wife?"

"Good enough," the chief answered tiredly. "It's been nothing but hell around here since your 'significant other' uncovered that inside Interpol job."

"Yeah, ehehe…. Leo's not here… Um, why the call so late?"

"We've got a situation at the Olympics."

"Well, I'm sure Leo could—"

"We need someone down there pronto, and your resignation isn't complete until next week."

"B-but Chief!"

"Zenigata, do this one last job, and we'll give you time and a half for it…"

"….I…."

"Max, this will be the last chance for a Zenigata to try to capture a Lupin. Think about your family's honor. I knew your father, Max."

'_Not as well as I do, you old senile bat,' _Max thought to himself, but allowed the chief to continue. The thought of one last blast before settling down completely was quite appealing to Max… He had once done stints in gangs, had gone to wild parties… Done things that he hoped his parents would never find out and that only Leo knew… He had given up all of that fun, so he was entitled to a grand finale.

"I'll be there as soon as I can," said Max. "I need to leave a note first, though."

"Good work, Zenigata. You make us proud," said the chief, who then hung up.

Italy:

"All right, Ally!" Fuji whistled and clapped as Ally slid across the ice, pounding an opponent against the glass and getting fowled for such. "Hang the ref! Kill him! C'mon!"

"Fuji," Ryo nodded to the direction of a petite blonde heading down the aisles, searching for her seat.

"Eep… Hide me," Fuji yelped and hid behind Ryo for protection as Carmen seated herself beside Odori, whose depressed look seem fixed upon her face.

"Jeeze, it looks like a funeral here," Ryo's eyes flashed open as she registered the slight American accent, and she looked upward, stunned, to Yukiko, who joined Fuji at her other side.

"Yukiko?" Ryo yelped. "W-what in the hell are you doing here!"

"It's not every year you have a brother in the Olympics," Yukiko replied with a shrug. "Besides, Toshiro and I came to an agreement for this."

"Which is?"

"He's looking after Saiyuri while I go watch Ally."

"Oh dear God… Dad better not find out about this!"

"If he does he'll also find out you're married," Yukiko answered, looking upward at her sister with a sense of seriousness.

"You little—You wouldn't!" Ryo yelped.

"Don't think I wouldn't," Yukiko answered calmly. Fuji suddenly became a mediator as she attempted to keep Ryo off of the calm Yukiko.

"Now, now—Let's just play nice, all right?" Fuji asked with a nervous chuckle.

"Ay, you want to sit down!" shouted another audience member.

Fuji gave a frown and slowly seated herself and Ryo, paying no attention to Heiji, who looked onward with a sort of disappointment.

"What's the score so far?" asked Carmen quietly.

"Huh? Oh… That… One to zero, I think," Odori answered, and gave a small sniff.

"Oh, Dori-chan, it'll be all right," said Fuji reassuringly.

"Do you every think that no, it won't be okay?" Heiji snipped.

"Hey, I didn't say you could come into this conversation," Fuji said with a frown.

"She's my sister, of course I'm in on it."

"Wish you'd defend me that much sometimes, Heiji," Fuji grumbled and rose.

"Where are you going?" asked Ryo.

"Out," Fuji answered. Yukiko paused a few moments, and after seeing no one else rising from their seats, followed Fuji out of the building.

"Hey, what's up with you?" asked Yukiko.

"Me? Me? I'm not the one who left my newborn in another continent!"

"Doesn't mean I don't love her any less," Yukiko answered. "Someone's gotta be the breadwinner in the family."

"You know, I'm a happy person, I try to stay positive… You… The only thing that you've ever scored positive on in your life is your pregnancy test!" Fuji growled, heading toward the brand-new red Fiat Victor had purchased earlier that morning.

"Woah, what?" Yukiko climbed into the Fiat beside Fuji and tilted her hat upward. "Is that what you're all pissy about?"

"You don't want a kid, and look what happens? Heh… My brother's got three, damn it. He isn't even married to someone with a damn uterus! He's gay and he's got three kids!"

"Hey, what's this?" Yukiko pulled out a magazine from beneath the car seat and scanned over it.

"It's nothing," Fuji answered and removed the magazine from Yukiko's hands, tossing it into the backseat.

"The Venus of Willendorf? Isn't that in Austria?"

"They're showing it in Turin briefly…."

"But I heard over the phone from Ally that you were after the Shroud of Turin."

"Pfft… My Grandpa stole the real one years ago. Why do you think the one they have today only carbon dates back to the 1500's. He switched them out years ago," Fuji murmured.

"But why would you want a statue of a fertility goddess?"

"So Heiji won't leave."

"…Wait, you're trying to have a kid so your fiancé won't leave you?"

"That bad."

"That's friggin' horrible!" Yukiko answered. "What makes you think that a little statue'll do the trick, anyway? Just eat some oysters… Or get drunk. Getting drunk helped me. In all reality that baby should've been named Corona Kahula."

"What's her middle name, anyway?"

"Lisa."

"….Li—Your husband's such an Elvis nerd he named his kid what Elvis named his daughter? Let's hope Saiyuri doesn't bring home a pasty freak."

"Guess that rules out any kids that yours would hang out with… Knowing you you'd have a little computer nerd, and it'd have computer nerd friends."

"Hmph, that'd involve me being able to have them."

"Why don' you just adopt, Fuji?" Yukiko sighed and sat back in her chair. "There're lots of little kids who would kill to be adopted by a rich family! Look at me… I'm lucky my dad took me in. Or how about Odori, huh? She'd have been married off at fourteen to some farmer if Goemon and Amaya hadn't stepped in and taken her!"

"…It just pisses me off that the one thing I want right now I can't just go out and get!"

"Heiji's love? You gettin' knocked up may make him stay, but it won't necessarily make him happier, Fuji, remember that."

"…Yeah, yeah… I'm still stealing the Willendorf statue. I need to at least try to see if it'll work."

"Good luck to you then, Fuji," Yukiko tipped her hat and exited the car. "Now if you excuse me, I need to watch my brother kick some Eastern European ass."

"Have a good one," Fuji murmured, waving Yukiko off.

Paris:

"I hope he's not too mad at me…" Leo muttered as he killed the headlights and stepped up to the front door. He was much too tired to argue, anyway. He gave a small shudder as the door creaked open, and slid off his shoes as he glided onto the wood of the living room and looked about for any signs of Max. It was then that he looked over his shoulder and noticed that the only car in the driveway was his. "…Maybe he went out for breakfast… Yeah, that's probably it."

Leo nodded this reassurance himself, but stopped in the middle of the room as he saw a sheet of paper beside a familiar necklace. He lifted up the necklace and felt dread sink in, and then slowly lifted up the note in Max's familiar frantic handwriting.

"….Left for Italy…. Don't know when I'll be back…. Tell the kids I love them…." Leo murmured, and sunk to the ground. He had been dumped….

"Look who came with the kids!" Lupin crowed, entering the house with a still sleeping Avery in his arms and an exhausted Fujiko walking behind him. Dako and Jared soon followed in after their grandparents, both bickering as usual.

"I've got to go!" Leo sprung up from the ground and pushed his way past his parents to the front door.

"Wha… Where?" Lupin wondered aloud.

"Italy!" Leo bolted out the door, returning a few moments later to retrieve his shoes. He hastily put these on, and the screeching of tires was heard outside of the household about thirty seconds later.

"…Great. First he's gay and now I think he's doing speed," Lupin grumbled, setting down Avery and allowing him to crawl around the house at his will.

"There's got to be an explanation for this," Fujiko said to herself, and then looked at the women's necklace lying on the desk. She scanned over the note beside it, and placed a hand on her mouth.

"Fujicakes, something wrong?" Lupin asked worriedly.

"Oh, nothing," Fujiko backed against the desk and quickly slipped the note and necklace into her purse and ran over to Avery. "No, no, no, Avery, not in the kitchen."

"Like this, Grandma," Dako made a fist and flicked her index and middle finger over her thumb while shaking her head.

"Lord, and I had a hard enough time trying to communicate with boys…" Fujiko sighed, making the gesture to her grandson.

"Well, you certainly had no trouble with men," Lupin said with a smile.

"No, I didn't. Which makes me wonder sometimes why I chose to marry a boy."

"Oh come on!" Lupin frowned.

"You aren't kinda childish," Jared admitted.

"And I'm also kinda not your cheap grandparent," Lupin snapped.

Turin, Italy:

"Now you promise you'll help me if I help you?" Ally asked Fuji, rubbing his sore shoulder.

"Yeah, yeah, now come on!"

"What'd you make her promise?" asked Yukiko.

"It doesn't matter," Ally shrugged. "Now what's the plan? This thing's under pretty high security…"

"Here ya go," Fuji smiled and handed him his hockey stick.

"What's this for?" asked Ally with a raised eyebrow.

"Make a slapshot and knock out the security system," Fuji smiled, tossing him a small stone. "Yukiko-san, you knocked out the guards?"

"Done and done," Yukiko gave a small chuckle and held up her magnum.

"Here goes," Fuji lied down on a creeper and propelled herself, flying just beneath the lasers surrounding the statue. Ally backed up, made a few practice swings, and made a shot that ricocheted off of a wall and to the security system behind the lasers, with the statue. While he took this Yukiko placed a silencer on her gun, and shot at the two security cameras. They had already been cut, but she did this for extra measure.

Fuji, meanwhile, made a cut in the glass, and removed another rock from her pocket, this one with a note attached to it. She gave a chuckle and lied back down upon the creeper, and slid out.

"LUPIN!" Fuji nearly dropped the statue in surprise, and turned to see an ever-annoyed Max looking back at her.

"Zenigata!" Fuji yelped. "Aren't you supposed retired!"

"Not for another week!" Max gave a long laugh and pulled out his handcuffs. "Now for about you drop that statue so I can get you in the pokey by morning."

"Max, you don't want to arrest me, and you know it," said Fuji with a smile.

"He's probably just gone crazy, Fuji… Glad to see you two are in the same boat. Why didn't you two ever just marry one another?"

"A blonde guy? Heh…"

"What do you mean? What does she mean, Lupin?" asked Max, not taking his eyes off of the statue.

"Well, with everything that happened in… Yeow…" Fuji cringed as she realized she was going much too far, but Max urged her on.

"About what?"

"It's nothing…"

"Tell me or I'll make sure you share your cell with the scariest, hairiest woman in the entire joint!"

"Listen, that's for you and Leo to go over, not me. It's not my place," Fuji replied, glancing to Ally momentarily.

Max caught sight of this, and looked to Ally briefly. In this brief second Yukiko shot, knocking the handcuffs out of his hands. Fuji climbed atop the creeper and skateboarding past Max, she placed one of the handcuffs on his own wrist and the other on a stern looking Roman statue.

"LUPIN! Damn it! Get back here!" Max shouted, giving a hard tug. He felt his stomach drop as he saw the statue begin to shift and toddle off of its pedestal. "Oh, no… Oh no no no…."

The next morning, a Turin jail:

"….Wow… Been in jails on four European countries… Luxembourg, here I come," Max murmured as his paperwork was stamped and he was told in a language that sounded vaguely like broken English that he was free to go. He nodded his thanks and turned to the man who had paid his bail, who tightly embraced him as he began to head out of the small booking room.

"I'm so sorry," Leo whispered as they walked out and down the stone steps. "Max, I'm sorry that it drove you that crazy… Please, just don't leave me!"

"What? Are you on speed now?"

"….Letter… I got a letter saying you were leaving me…"

"For like a week!" Max hopped into the passenger seat of the rental car and turned to Leo. "What did you think I was talking about?"

"Nothing…"

"No, Leo, come on, what is it?"

"…I… I saw the necklace with it."

"Yeah, your sister's."

"That wasn't my sister," Leo said quietly.

"…Let me out," Max demanded after a pause.

"Listen, nothing happened, all right?"

"Leo, why in the…Wha-what did happen? Fuji was talking about it, too! You know I'm a little tired of everyone in your family knowing more about our marriage than me."

"She asked me to leave you," Leo answered after a period of silence. "I wouldn't do it. Her name's Charley. She was the one investigating the assassination list."

"I thought she looked familiar," Max muttered. "You… You wouldn't leave me for her? But she was pretty hot… Well, very… She was totally poured into those jeans she was in."

"Watch it," Leo snapped, and yawned.

"You haven't been to sleep yet?" Max asked worriedly.

"I drove here from France," Leo answered. "Non-stop. Well, one stop… To get some coffee and a paper. A paper that informed me that an Interpol officer had destroyed an ancient Roman statue."

"Hey, at least they're not pressing charges," Max shrugged.

"Now they aren't, because I translated for the curator a while back," Leo grumbled.

"…That's really sweet, what you did," Max said. "...Kinda hot, too. Hey, why don't you pull over?"

"…Why?"

"I've never been in an Italian jail before, and there's something else I've never done in Italy…"

"…You're worse than my father," Leo said with a laugh. "We can't right now. We've got a wedding to go to."

"What? Whose?" asked Max with a frown. "Your sister?"

"No… But I'm best man at it," replied Leo.

A small church, that night:

"Come in," Carmen called as she adjusted her veil. Fuji slowly opened the door and cleared her throat at Carmen's icy glare.

"Um, hey," Fuji gave a shy wave. "Just wanted to… You know, give my congratulations. You're lucky…."

"That's all you wanted?" Carmen rose from the bench and placed the veil over her eyes.

"Yeah… Pretty much…. Um, no hard feelings, right?"

"I…. Well…"

"Carmen, the past is the past," Fuji said with a small hopeful smile. "Now you've forgiven Ally, and Ally's forgiven himself… If you forgive me all I'll have to do is forgive myself."

"It was an accident," Carmen said to herself quietly. "Why are you doing this now?"

"I want to be your… Well, I don't have to be your friend, if you don't want, but I don't want you to be mad at anyone… Trust me, it's not just to make myself feel better! I just want to shut this door… All I want is closure."

Carmen gave a frown, and began to stick out her hand. Fuji cringed and instinctively placed her hands in front of her face, and peeked out from behind her shield to see Carmen's hand extended. Fuji uneasily reached for it, then shook it.

"Thanks," Fuji said with a smile.

"Just don't touch him again, or you'll end up in the dungeon," Carmen answered with a chuckle.

'_Ohhhh good luck with this one, Al,' _a nervous Fuji thought. She broke out of the handshake and waved Carmen off. "Well, see ya outside, Mrs. Jigen!"

Carmen nodded, and went back to adjusting her gown for the ceremony.

"He come yet?" Fuji asked Ryo asked she walked into a back room fo the church.

"Not yet," Ryo answered with a shake of the head. "You get your statue?"

"Yeah," Fuji gave a small discontented sigh. "But I can't find anything on how to work the damn thing. So I chucked it."

"You sure that was what you wanted to do?"

"Yeah," Fuji answered. "Besides, I'm not ready for anything like kids yet. I'll give it a few years."

"You learn well, grasshopper," Yukiko chuckled and stepped into the room. "I gotcha what you needed."

"Gracias," Fuji took the bag from Yukiko and unzipped it, then went to work.

About half an hour later, after Leo and Max had shown and the rest of the guests had seated themselves (Max was somehow in the small church beside Ryo, making it a tense occasion for him) the wedding proceeded with Carmen's mother in attendance along with Ally's parents and his two youngest sisters, as well as Sachiko, who every once in a while would look over her shoulder at Heiji.

Jigen looked back at Ryo and asked quietly, "You're not gonna plan something small like this are you, Ryoko?"

"Me? Never, Daddy," Ryo chuckled, and gripped onto Victor's arm tightly.

"Hey, where's Toshiro?" Jigen turned his head and faced Yukiko, who had told him that she had only arrived in Italy in order to watch Ally marry. She spoke not a word of the statue she had stolen the previous night.

"He's at home with the baby… He and Ally never got along well enough for this, anyway," Yukiko shrugged.

"What about Fuji?"

"Probably went to go get their wedding gift… She's always late with that crap," Yukiko answered coolly. She silenced as she heard the music start and Carmen walked down the aisle, and stood beside Ally. The vows were read, and the rings were exchanged, and there was a standing ovation as the couple ran down the aisle and out of the church.

"Hey, gimme a second," said Ally, stepping back from Carmen. "I forgot my wallet in the church."

"I…Well, all right," Carmen gave a nod and stepped into the limousine while 'Ally' ran into the back room of the church.

The real Ally was in the back of the church still, and pulled off his disguise—A priest who had watched the ceremony closely, "Thanks again."

"Heh, hey, what are friends for?" Fuji ripped off the mask and slid off the ring. "You kids have a good time now."

"Yeah, see ya," Ally embraced Fuji tightly, and Fuji patted him on the back. "You're one of my best friends, you know that, right?"

"Hey, if I were anyone else I don't think you would've allowed me to kiss your wife," Fuji chuckled as she broke hold from him. She only waited until he had left the room the wipe her eyes.

"Sorry about that," Ally climbed into the limo and motioned for the driver to take off.

"It's no problem," Carmen leaned in and kissed Ally, and blinked a few times, then pulled at his cheek.

"Ouch! What was that for!"

"I wanted to make sure I was going back to the hotel with Ally," Carmen answered. "…Who was that that…"

"You don't want to know, Honey," Ally patted her on the hand. "I… You're not mad at me, are you?"

"Hrm, well, at least you're staying for the important part," Carmen answered with a chuckle. To this statement Ally gave a blush. "Hope it won't take your focus off of your game…"

"Eh, Eastern Europe's kicking our ass, anyway," Ally answered, leaning in and kissing him.

The limo driver dropped off the happy couple at the wedding party, then drove back to the church, where only one figure stood outside on the front steps of the church. Fuji had taken Namiko with her in an attempt to ease her urge to feel matronly, allowing Odori some time for herself.

"Excuse me, Miss, would you like a ride home?" asked the driver. "No charge."

"I am fine," Odori answered sternly.

"You sure? Well, would you like to at least like to get something to eat with me?"

"Will you leave me alone afterward?"

"I don't think you'll want that," he answered, and opened the door to the front of the limo. Odori picked up her sword and against her better judgment climbed into the limousine.

"So what are you so down about?"

"Nothing," Odori grumbled, staring out the window.

"Seems like everyone's getting depressed… I just had this real great girl who left me," he said with a sigh. "And now I'm trying to figure out how to get her to give me a second chance…"

"What, is she stubborn?" Odori gave a small smile and slowly turned her head to Jordan.

"God, she's one of the worst!" Jordan laughed and shook his head. "There's still something about her… What about you? Someone break your heart?"

Odori gave a nod, "But I'm stupid in the fact that I think I would probably give him another shot if he were here…"

"You two would take it slower of course, right?"

"Of course," Odori replied. "But that's only if he removes that stupid hat."

"I think he can do that," Jordan laughed, and tossed the hat over his shoulder.

An Italian hotel, later that evening:

Ally lifted Carmen up and carried her into the hotel room, dropping her on the bed and laughing.

"Hey, I'll be right back," Ally kissed her and stepped into the bathroom. He removed his jacket and brushed some of his pulled hair back over his eyes, fumbling as he heard his cell phone go off. "Hello?"

"Ally?" Toshiro's ever-Brooklyn thick accent came from the other end of the line. "I… I hope I didn't catch you two in…. You know, the middle of something."

"No, you lucked out," Ally answered. "But you've got only one minute, so go."

"I'm just sorry that I wasn't able to be there… And good luck…."

"That's it?"

"….That's it, unless you want me to tell you that I love you or something…"

"You Broadway fairy," Ally chuckled. "Thanks… Your minute's up, though. Go take care of the baby, or do something constructive at least."

"I'll think about your sister… Hey, maybe when you're older I'll tell you about the night Saiyuri was created. Maybe it'll give you ideas."

"Why you perverted—"

"Bye!" Toshiro hung up the phone, and Ally made sure to shut off his cell phone before he walked back out to Carmen.

"Was this a wedding gift?" Carmen stared and the statue of the round, almost pregnant looking woman.

"I guess… It's friggin' ugly, though. Must be from Fuji…" Ally answered, slipping off his tie. "Just put it on the dresser."

Carmen nodded and set it on the dresser beside her veil, and walked back over to Ally. She stood in front of him and ran her fingers through his hair, and then pushed him back onto the bed, switching off the light right before pinning him.

"…..Christ, this is better than four gold medals…" Ally murmured through the darkness.


	37. Nancy with the Laughing Face

DISCLAIMER: Don't own it, and by the looks of my updates you'd think I didn't own a calendar, either.

Hey there, hi there, ho there!

My sincerest apologies for the lack of an update… I hadn't even realized how long it had been! School has just been, well, quite hectic, as of recent, as has work. I really do hope to get back on schedule with my updates… I also had a mess of home repair to do over the week, which for the mostpart kept me away from anything resembling an internet cable.Onnnn the upside, while cleaning my room, I found a bunch of sketches from when I began this series (a lot of horrible sketches, heh. But some people like looking at that sort of thing, I suppose). Hopefully I'll have them up soon enough. See ya around!

Fun Fact of Boredom: Well, I've gotten asked this a lot over the years, so I thought I might answer it here… The character I think I've based myself most off of is Leo… I'm working on becoming a translator, and I have a great deal of siblings spread across the country, even across an ocean. We also have similar personalities and, hell, if I could find a Jewish/Japanese guy? If he had a girlfriend already, she'd vanish quickly, you can rest assured.

Chapter thirty-seven: Nancy (with the laughing face)

New York City:

"You got into _what_?" Yukiko asked with a smile.

"_The King and I_," Toshiro answered with a smile. "I could barely believe it, myself…."

The smallest Ishikawa, in the back room, gave a cry, and Yukiko immediately walked to her child's room and retrieved the baby, "That's terrific… So when do you start?"

"Tomorrow," Toshiro answered, and rose from the couch, to his tiny daughter. He ran his hand through her short hair and chuckled. "I think it'd bore her…"

"Hell, half the things you've done bore me, but I sit through them," said Yukiko plainly, sitting down in the chair in the corner of the living room and rocking back and forth with her. "Hey, where are you going?" she asked as she watched him pulling on a heavier kimono.

"Um.. I just have to do something…" Toshiro replied.

Yukiko tilted her head to a side and frowned, "It's not getting rid of the Vespa, is it? You don't have to…. Hell, you could ride with Dori if you wanted!"

"No… I just… There's too many memories in it for me," said Toshiro quietly, and exited the house. He saw the bike in front of the garage, and gave a small sigh as he mounted it and began to drive down the small road in front of their home.

"Crap!" he said aloud as he realized he had left a costume that needed mending at the theater. "Well… One last ride to the theater wouldn't hurt…"

Paris:

"Three more days until you're officially retired," Leo marked off another day on the calendar and smiled as he looked over his shoulder to his husband, who was busying himself reading the paper.

"Yeah…" Max muttered, and flipped yet another page.

The phone gave a ring, and Leo hurried to catch it. Max, meanwhile, gave a sigh and looked to Avery, who was playing with his Cheerios gleefully.

"Allo? Le residence de la famille de Lupin. C'est Leo. Hey, chief! Busy? No… Um, no, this is Leo Lupin… You want to speak with Max? Okay, here…"

"He's probably figured out that I've been the one stealing his staplers for the past year…" Max muttered underneath his breath as he took the phone. "What's up?"

Leo blinked a few times at the flippant greeting, but was soon distracted by Dako and Jared's arguing in the next room.

"You want me to WHAT?" the suddenly shrill tone of Max's voice made Leo jump, and he turned back about to see what had happened. "Well, I… But, I… You can't keep do—Who? Oh, well… That changes everything…" Max hung up the phone and looked upward to Leo. "I've got to go to New York."

"But Max! I—"

"I've got to do this, Leo," said Max sternly. "Just trust me, all right?"

"Is everyone okay?"

"Yeah… They're fine… I've just got to find an old friend is all."

"Why?"

"I need to arrest them… I'm the only one who'd know where he'd be hiding."

"I'm going with you, then."

"Leo, you can't. You—"

"Mom and Dad love having the kids over. And it's for only this one job, right?"

"Urm, right…."

"So? Let's go together," Leo gave a sly smile and placed an arm on Zenigata's back.

"I'm not sure you'd exactly be comfortable with all of it."

"Since I've met you I've been to gay bars, an S&M club—"

"—On accident—"

"Yeah, but still. How much weirder could it be?"

"Heh… If you start growing a beard now you ought to be good enough by the time we get there."

"G—What? What's that supposed to mean?"

New York:

"….Excuse me, could I help you?" Toshiro spied a small figure in the center of the theater stage, looking in awe at the lighting and rigging overhead.

She turned to face him, and Toshiro nearly fell off of the stage, "Ju-Julie?"

"Julie?" she blinked a few times, "You knew Julie?"

"She… Who are you?" Toshiro's expression darkened and he began to draw out his sword.

"No, please don't!" she yelped, and took a few terrified steps back, "My name's Nancy, I'm Julie's sister!"

"…Sister?..." Toshiro slowly sheathed his sword once again and looked downward at the young girl. "I never… I never met you. I didn't even see you at the funeral."

"I was a coward," she said with a low voice. "I didn't have the courage to. Not after the way I spoke to her the last time we talked. Now, who are you?"

"I… Well, I was her boyfriend, for some time."

"Oh, so you're the 'loser'. My parents talked about you!"

"Apparently it wasn't anything good," Toshiro said in a low voice. '_It's frightening how much… They look so alike! She's probably what our daughter would've looked like!'_

"Mr.? Are you all right?"

"Hrm? Oh, yes… I'm fine," Toshiro gave a brief shake of the head and cleared his throat. "My name's Goemon, but everybody calls me Toshiro. So did you come here for any reason in particular, Nancy?"

"Just to say goodbye," Nancy replied quietly. "Hey, um… This might a little forward, but… Do you have anything of Julia's around? I mean, it'd…. It'd mean an awful lot if—" She didn't even have a chance to finish. She had broken down into tears by the end of her sentence.

"It's all right," Toshiro placed his hands on her shoulders and sighed. "I'll take you to my house. You can meet my wife and I'll see what I can find you, all right?"

"Thank you," Nancy wiped her eyes and allowed Toshiro to lead her out. In the end, Toshiro still forgot to pick up what he had come for.

When he arrived home, he had half a mind to turn the Vespa back around and head for safety. Fuji's car was in the driveway.

"Is something the matter? You're very pale…" Nancy said worriedly.

"I'm fine," Toshiro shook his head and dismounted the bike. He looked back at the bike a moment and a thought came to him, but this vanished as he heard familiar yelling from inside.

"Oh, God…What now?" Toshiro sighed and stepped into the house, where Yukiko and Fuji were in the midst of their usual verbal battle.

"And I'm telling you that that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard!" Yukiko shouted, and looked upward to Toshiro. "Thank God. A voice of reason around here! Please explain to this little idiot that it doesn't matter how many guns you have, when you're dealing with a supposed murderer, you're askin' for it!"

"Well, I…"

"Toshiro, this guy's a serial murderer!"

"Which is why the police should do their job and handle it. You're a thief, not Wonder Woman, Fuji! No one's been able to catch the guy yet!"

"There's a reason behind these murders, though!"

"Why do you even care? Not to sound heartless, but you usually don't."

"You're right, I don't—Usually. But I've got my reasons!"

"Those being?"

"Those being to protect you," Fuji answered. "…Hey, who's the girl?"

"This is Nancy," Toshiro cleared his throat as he introduced the petite brunette, "Julia's sister."

Yukiko mouthed a phrase beneath her breath and turned back into the house as she heard the baby crying, "Fuji, if you even try to go I'll bust your kneecaps so you won't be able to walk!"

"Wow… She's, um… Scary," said Nancy with a small chuckle.

"She's my wife," Toshiro answered, walking into the household past Fuji.

"Fine, I'll go on my own, then," Fuji grumbled and stormed away from the house. "Everyone has kids and they forget about the people who supported them, or in my case, helped get you two together in the first place!"

"And who's she?" asked Nancy in a whisper, pointing to Fuji.

"Our boss," Toshiro replied. "Come on, I'll show you the living room."

"Wow…" Nancy looked around the home and the Japanese furnishings, and was surprised and a little frightened at the sight of an unloaded gun on the table in the dining room.

"She must've been cleaning," Toshiro murmured. "You're not going to leave that out when Saiyuri starts walking, are you, Yukiko?"

"Hey, I've got time!" Yukiko answered. "Besides, I've been handling guns since I was six, and look at how I turned out!"

"….You're not going to leave that out when Saiyuri—"

"Damn it, no!" Yukiko walked into the dining room, and looked past Toshiro to Nancy. "So were are you staying?"

"Nowhere yet," Nancy replied. "I kinda just came on a whim…"

"Well, she could stay with us, right, Yukiko?" Toshiro asked, looking to his wife and then to Nancy.

"I guess," Yukiko said with a moment's hesitation.

"Oh my gosh, really? Thanks!" Nancy gasped. "I'll get my backpack from the Vespa!"

"You aren't jealous or anything, are you?" Toshiro asked with a whisper, looking to Yukiko.

"Nope. You know who owns you," Yukiko answered, nudging him in the arm. "Besides, she'll keep you company."

"Company?"

"I'm going to make sure Fuji doesn't go killing herself," Yukiko picked up the gun from the dining room table and placed it in her holster. "Doesn't seem like she's got anyone else right now. Yeesh, Ryo finally stops bein' suicidal and now I've got to watch out for Fuji!"

"What? Wait, we never agreed to anything like that!" Toshiro yelped. "What about Saiyuri?"

"If this guy's as dangerous as Fuji says he is, then I've definitely got to protect you guys."

"What makes you think he'd even go after us!"

"…You seen my fedora around?"

"Yukiko, what aren't you telling me?" Toshiro asked suspiciously.

"Listen, it ain't anything important," Yukiko shook her head.

"Yuki—"

"It's the guy… It's the guy who killed Julia, Toshiro," Yukiko heaved a sigh. "Stay with her sister, keep her protected."

"That's my fight, though!"

"Julia may have been your girlfriend, but she was my friend, and I owe her for taking care of you like she did," Yukiko picked up her fedora from the living room and looked over her shoulder to Toshiro. "Now I'm going to try to track down Fuji. I'll be back soon, hopefully."

"….Be careful, Yukiko."

"Hey, aren't I always?" Yukiko tipped her hat, chuckled and exited through the front door. "Now to track—Son of a bitch…" she muttered as she saw Fuji's car still parked in front of the house. "You never left, did you?"

"What can I say, you're predictable!" Fuji laughed. "I also picked up your suits from the cleaners!"

"You better not have touched my underwear or anything," Yukiko grumbled.

"You're such a freak about that. How gay do you think I am?"

"Only as gay as your brother," Yukiko answered, lifting up a backpack from the living room and then hopping down the steps to Fuji's car.

"Whatcha got there, Mom? Snacks?"

"Bullets," Yukiko replied, tossing the bag in the back seat of the car and causing it to bounce from the weight reasonably.

"Why haven't you just made the switch to automatic?" Fuji inquired plainly, leaning upon the wheel of the car.

"Because some of us are faithful to what's done us good in the past."

"Why do I just know that that's somehow a burn on me?" asked Fuji.

"Get movin' already. I don't want to be around here longer than I have to."

"Aren't you a little worried about Toshiro-chan?"

"Why should I be? He knows I'd beat his ass in if he ever did anything. Plus he wouldn't cheat on me."

"Oh? And what makes you the token one not to get cheated on, eh? Is there some great secret I'm missing?"

"He worked too hard for me," Yukiko answered with a confident smile. "Now let's head out."

A New York Airport:

"Ugh, I think I know how Jigen feels now," Leo scratched at his new beard while the blond 'woman' in the long skirt and head covering beside him rolled 'her' eyes.

"Quit being such a baby," Max grumbled. "How's my makeup? It on all right?"

"Yeah, but your chest is crooked," Leo whispered.

"Aie," Max briefly turned away from the crowds and adjusted, then looked back to Leo. "What about now?"

"Yeah… You look great," Leo nodded. "So what's my name again?"

"You wouldn't be able to pronounce it if you tried," Max waved his hand lightly and sighed. "Just let me take care of the introductions."

"Of course, my Orthodox Jewish princess," Leo took his 'wife's' hand and kissed it, and gave a small grin. "So where's this guy supposed to be?"

"At a service downtown," answered Max.

"I don't know any prayers or anything! I'll be lost!" Leo yelped.

"Don't worry, I was almost a rabbi, remember?"

"I also remember you getting kicked out."

"For being gay, not for sucking," Max answered quickly.

"…Oh, I'm not even going there," Leo shook his head. "So you want to hail a cab?"

"Nope. Sun's down, so we walk it."

"What? Max, you're kidding me, right?"

"Hey, we've got to keep up an image here," Max adjusted the scarf upon his head and looked at Leo's hopeless expression. "It'll be fine. You could use the walk, anyway. You're getting chunky."

"Oh, look who's talking!" Leo grumbled. "You weight thirty more than me, you cow!" a woman passing by in the airport stopped and stared wide-eyed at the couple, and Max quickly pulled Leo away from any other large crowds.

"It's only a lousy mile or five," Max said to Leo with a smile. "And after this we'll go out, how's that sound?"

"Hey, wear the dress and we can go dancing," Leo said with a smirk.

"Now there's an idea," Max said with a small sigh. "That's something you've never done for me."

"Well, it isn't exactly easy finding a place for us to go."

"We should move to California."

"I… I actually wanted to talk to you," Leo stopped and cleared his throat. "About, well… They've got a great school for Avery in Washington, D.C., and I thought about taking up a job there, translating for officials."

"And I would…"

"Be a good little housewife and bake cookies," Leo chuckled. "We've got some time yet, but I've thought about us maybe doing that."

"We'll talk," Max answered. "Now let's go find us an old buddy of mine, shall we?"

"Hey, Max, define 'buddy'."

"What? Why, do you think I—"

"Well, urm, kinda," Leo admitted with a small shrug. "Not that there's anything wrong with it, you've just… You've gotten around."

"Oh, look, snow cones. I think I'll get one…"

"Max…"

New York:

"So you want me to follow her?" Odori looked up from beneath the straw hat and watched her brother give a nod. "You will stay with Jordan, then."

"Wait, I can always give you a hand," Jordan rose from the living room couch to Odori.

"I will be fine. If you want to help, then look after Namiko," Odori lifted up her sword and her bag and stood in front of Jordan for a few moments, unsure of what exactly to do. He bent downward and kissed her on the cheek, and Odori gave a blush, and headed out of household.

"…When did I become the nursery bitch?" Toshiro wondered aloud.

"Heh, you know, I'm asking myself that same question, buddy," Jordan mumbled. "Hey, where's your other visitor?"

"Hrm? Oh, Nancy! She's looking through some photographs," Toshiro answered.

"She know yet exactly who your wife went to go off?"

"No, and I don't think it's important she know," Toshiro shook his head and walked over to Saiyuri's crib, and lifted the swaddled baby out and into his arms. "Yukiko will get the job done."

"Yeah, I've only seen her miss her target once."

"Really? Who in the hell was that?"

"Me, fortunately," Jordan scratched the back of his head and gave a shy smile. "We were having an argument. She ended up grazing me. I've still got the scar on my--"

"I think I'm going to check on Nancy," Toshiro rose from his spot quickly and left Jordan alone in the living room with Namiko.

Namiko poked the end of Jordan's nose and chirped. "Dada!"

"Aie," Jordan grumbled and rubbed his eyes. "Just when I thought I'd gotten away from this psychotic family, now I'm dating one of them. And it's your fault. If you just called my 'Jordan' your mom wouldn't think you like me so much."

"Dada!" Namiko cried once again and leaned into Jordan.

"…Yeah, I'll bet that's what you say to all of the guys," Jordan murmured.

"Nancy?" Toshiro called as he walked down the long hall. "Where are you?"

"Oh! Hi!" Nancy rushed out of the den with a handful of photographs and a smile on her face. "I only got the doubles. I never even saw her while she was pregnant, so it's weird seeing her in some of these."

"She was one of the most gorgeous pregnant women I'd ever seen," Toshiro fondly said with a smile. "Would you like me to grab you a bag from the kitchen?"

"Yeah, I'd like that a lot," Nancy smiled and looked down at the photos, and back up to Toshiro. She quietly began to walk down the hall after Ishikawa, but made a dead stop as she saw Jordan seated in the living room.

"I'm the friend," Jordan explained, leaning back against the couch. "You must be another one of Toshiro's friends, then, right?"

"Exactly," Nancy gave a nod, followed by a period of silence until Toshiro returned with a paper bag. Jordan never took his eyes off of this exchange, and while Nancy gave an occasional tense glance in the tall blonde's direction. She faltered a moment before gratefully being called away from Jordan by Toshiro in the kitchen.

A Queens synagogue:

"…I don't really like religious places, Max. They make me feel like I'm going to pass out," Leo whispered as they entered the building.

"You'll be fine. Just act as backup for me. I'm going to talk to the perp," Max whispered.

"What, you see him?" Leo blinked with confusion as he looked over the sea of black head coverings in the crowds of men.

"Yup," Max nodded and began to walk over to a group of women. Leo tilted his head to a side and began to speak, but was quickly ushered into an aisle by another man.

"…You look good, Noah," said Max in a near whisper as he seated himself beside a dark haired woman. "The surgeries went well, I see."

"The doctors were wonderful," 'she' answered, moving over a bit for Max to become more comfortable. "I should give you my doctor's name."

"Sorry, not that into the whole girl thing. I like standing up to do certain things," Max replied.

"And that's why you're in a skirt?" she asked with a chuckle.

"Noah…"

"It's Meredith, now," answered Meredith quickly. "And I know why you're here. I didn't do it, Max. I hired a guy."

"Why'd you do that, N-Meredith?"

"Another boyfriend," Meredith gave a small sigh and closed her eyes. "No one treated me the same after you left. I guess I was just trying to get back what we had, so, I ended up with a cop… Me, with a cop, I know…"

"Not that hard to believe," Max said with a grin. "Listen, I…. Are you planning on leaving the country?"

"Now that I see you, I suppose I should… Could I ask for a small head start? Do a favor for a lady?"

"I… Why are you asking that of me in a place like this? I'm a cop, you know I…."

"I'll tell you who did it," Meredith said quickly. "I know all about the guy, Max…. His name and everything."

"I'm scared to ask," Max muttered and rose. "Come on. We'll go downtown and get coffee there, and we'll figure it out. Meredith?" Max fell back against a set of chairs as he noted Meredith had turned deathly pale, and collapsed to the floor, a dagger in her back.

Max looked upward toward a window on the roof of the synagogue, and took off running with his gun as pandemonium irrupted within the service.

"You take the front, I'll take the roof!" Max announced to Leo, who had also drawn his gun and was working on getting the congregation out of the building. Max grabbed onto the Rabbi as he ran past. "Where's the stairs to the roof?"

"Through those doors, the very end!" the Rabbi replied, and continued to assist Leo in helping the congregation exit without too many injuries after Max had let go of his grasp. Max shoved his gun back in his belt and ran through the back door, and climbed up the metal ladder to the roof, whose door had to be pried off. Max climbed onto the roof of the synagogue, which sloped at an awkward angle and made running after the assassin all the more difficult. The man was dressed in all black, and looked back at Max once more, and gave an arrogant wave before jumping off of the roof. Max began to run after him, but became caught up in a wire which he had not seen placed on the roof, and tumbled off of the roof. He let out a yell as he began to fall to the concrete, but suddenly felt himself cradled in a pair of arms. He was greeted by the eyes of the same Rabbi as he realized he had not fallen to his death.

"Are you all right, 'Miss'?" asked the Rabbi, setting Max upon the ground.

"Urm, y-yeah…" Max sputtered and adjusted his heels. "Leo. Where's Leo? Leo! Hey, Ari!"

"Your companion, the other one with the gun, is back inside," answered the Rabbi.

"Thanks. Take care of your people, Rabbi," Max gave and nod and then hurried back into the synagogue. Leo was bent over Meredith, checking for a pause, and looked down at the body grimly as he stood.

"Looks like poison…" Leo murmured. "Max, are you…?"

"Yeah, I… I'm fine," Max cleared his throat and adjusted his scarf. "I can hear reinforcements. You want to head out?"

"Sounds like a good idea. We're ICPO, not CSI…." Leo answered, his face still drawn with concern for Max as they left the body for the paramedics. "Did you get any information?"

"Listen, I'm not mad at you, but… I just don't want to talk right now," said Max quietly.

"Yeah," Leo gave a small nod, and placed an arm over Max's shoulders. He was stunned as, underneath a covered walkway leading out of the synagogue, Max leaned into Leo and gave way to crying. Leo slowly sunk to the concrete as Max pulled him down, neither man saying anything to one another.

New York:

"You see anything?" Yukiko inquired, and looked over to Fuji.

"Not a damn thing…" Fuji sighed and sat back in her seat, giving a heavy groan and running her hands through her short hair.

"Well, he's a ninja, so I guess we wouldn't exactly be seeing the guy go to get the paper…." Yukiko grumbled.

"Crap, phone!" Fuji reached in her jacket pocket and tossed aside the night vision lenses she had been using to spy for her prey, nearly hitting Yukiko in the process. The Jigen-Ishikawa gave a grumble and threw these in the back seat while Fuji began to speak to the person on the other line, who, with a little listening, Yukiko realized to be Heiji.

"Mm-hm… He what? Well, all right…. Yeah, yeah… Thanks, Heiji. Me? Oh, I'm… I'm not too bad… How about you? India, huh? Well, have a good time…. Say hi for me," Fuji hung up her phone and looked over to Yukiko. "Seems like he ain't alone."

"What? Who else is working with him?"

"He's married," Fuji answered, and went back to surveying the theater which Toshiro usually worked out of, just in case he decided to show there.

"Yeah? And? Anything else?"

"Yeah… Apparently he's so deadest on destroying Toshiro even though the Rat Clan leader's forbidden him from it because he's jealous."

"Of Toshiro? Why? Can't be because of me or anything…"

"Definitely not," Fuji replied. "But, hey, how would you feel if Ryo left for years and even fought against you and she was still the favorite?"

"W-what? What are you saying? That big, scary guy's…."

"Yeah, your brother-in-law," Fuji replied. "Hrm… Hey, check it out. Gi wearing girl at twelve o' clock."

"You say that like you think I know what direction to look in," Yukiko murmured and took the binoculars from Fuji. "Ah, I see… Hey, ain't that just a lady in a bathrobe?"

"Give me those," Fuji gave a frustrated sigh and took these once again, and then pointed to the top of the theater. "See! Long hair! Traditional samurai robe!"

"….Hey, that's Dori!" said Yukiko with a frown. "What the hell is she doing here?"

Later:

"Y-You know what? You two deserve one another, so have a damn nice life together!" Yukiko shouted and tossed the last jacket in her suitcase while a now silenced Jordan and Toshiro looked onward. Fuji had hold of the baby's supplies, and Yukiko took her daughter from the crib before storming out.

"Wait! Where are you going!" Toshiro demanded, running out to catch Yukiko before she had gotten to any of the cars.

"Where else?" Yukiko pointed with her suitcase-filled hand to a house a few hundred yards away. "My mother's! And if I catch either of you there, I'll shoot."

"Fuji, could you talk to her?" Jordan asked with a sigh.

"Hey, I'd be pissed, too," Fuji admitted and gave a shrug. "I'm just going to make sure she takes breaks from her fuming to feed the baby. See ya!"

"Yeah, konbanwa," Toshiro said darkly, and shut the front door after the two women had left.

"I hope I didn't disrupt anything," Nancy said quietly, taking a step forward with her hands clasped together.

"You're fine, Nancy," Toshiro heaved a sigh and fell back into a chair in the living room. "She doesn't get that I don't think she's capable… I just didn't want her getting hurt! Now is that a bad thing to do?"

"Not in the least," Nancy answered with a shake of the head. "Umm… Well, if it gets your mind off of it, that is, if you want, could you help me sort out some pictures?"

"I'd love to," Toshiro nodded his head and rose. "Dori, I'll look after Namiko if you wish."

"No need, she is already asleep. However, thank you, Toshiro," Odori gave a nod and picked up her sword from her side. "I'll be joining her momentarily."

"Okay… Yours and Jordan's room's upstairs," Toshiro said, and at news of this, Odori stopped and flushed, and turned to Jordan quietly.

"Did you make those arrangements?"

"First I've heard of them," Jordan answered, placing his hands in his pockets. "Urm, we'll figure out something, right?"

"Mm," Odori gave a nod, and she was followed up the stairs by the tall Lupin son. She opened the door to her daughter's by a crack to check on the little girl, and when she saw that Namiko was still sound asleep, she shut the door and continued into hers and Jordan's room.

"This is nice… I'm scared to admit that Yukiko couldn't have made any room match this well, so I guess it was her—"

"Mother," Odori answered quickly and opened her backpack. She removed her sandals, first, and then took down her hair from its tight ponytail as she sat in front of the backpack, working in silence. Jordan found this awkward after a few moments, and cleared his throat and went to unpacking his own suitcase.

"So Toshiro is helping out Nancy," Odori concluded, and Jordan gave a nod. "And Namiko's asleep… Well, we pretty much have the second story of this home to ourselves, then."

"Mm-hm," Jordan agreed absently, and failed to notice Odori walk to the door and casually lock it and then seat herself in front of him.

"So you find refolding your jeans more interesting than me? Perhaps I should take up a hobby," Odori said jokingly.

"Er, sorry, I…"

"Like I stated before, it is just us up here."

"Odori, I, ummm…. I've got to take these shirts downstairs… I… I don't know what the hell I was thinking when I took them out of the dryer, but they aren't as dry as I thought they'd be."

"If I am coming off as some sort of desperate whore to you, you have my apologies. I am not your sister, but I will be the first to admit that even I get lonely, and that is not something easy for me to say."

"Woah, what! D-Dori, you're fine. You don't have to do anything that you don't want to. Damn it, I don't want to push you into anything."

"Nor do I wish to do so with you," Odori answered, and rose. "I am very sorry, I'll leave you to your packing, Jordan."

"Dori… Hey, how about we go off for a little while after all of this, eh? I've got a place in California you might like… It's about half an hour from an all Korean quarter…. After this, we'll go there. I'm just having some issues right now with this girl who says she's Julia's sister is all."

"You don't trust her…"

"Not in the least," Jordan answered with a shake of the head. "I've got the tech guy from my gang running background checks on her, but he hasn't found crap."

"Well, there's always your brother in the ICPO," Odori said with a shrug.

"Ur, yeah… But that'd involve talking with my brother-in-law—Aw, crap…"

"What's wrong?"

"If it couldn't get any worse…" Jordan stood in front of the window, Odori joining him after several moments. "My brother and my brother-in-law… Who is wearing a dress…" Jordan muttered.

"…He's got nice legs…"

"Hey! Don't even look at that!"

"God, who now?" Toshiro grumbled from his living room as he heard the doorbell go off to the now-normal tune of _Eidleweiss_. "What the hell do you want!" he swung the door open wide, but silenced as he saw it was a tired looking Leo and a shaken Max.

"Mind if we stay over tonight?" asked Leo with a sigh. "And I need a shave…"

"….I'll order pizza," Toshiro gave a sigh and stepped out of the way in order for the two to pass into the living room.

Across the property, Fuji and Yukiko found themselves in the house alone, as Sakura and her boyfriend had gone out of town for the weekend.

"He can be the biggest jerk in the world," Yukiko grumbled.

"Mm-hmm…" Fuji flipped through her magazine complacently as Yukiko sat cross-legged on the living room couch, the baby in her arms.

"I mean…. He thinks I'm friggin' twelve, sometimes!" Yukiko added.

"Yup… Hey, if I were a type of fish, which do you think I'd be? Salmon, royal blue tang, koi, or marlin?"

"What in the hell are you doing?"

"Personality quiz….. I'm thinking salmon," Fuji said with a confident nod after a moment's thought, and circled her selection in the magazine. "And that's two points for question two…"

"Jesus, Fuji…" Yukiko growled and stood. "How can you be so friggin' flippant about friggin' everything! Don't you take anything seriously?"

"VD's," Fuji said after a pause. She chased after Yukiko as the Jigen went storming out of the room, and caught sight of the familiar car in front of Toshiro's house. She thought little of this, however. She was more concerned with Yukiko, at the moment. "Yukiko-chan, I just don't see the big deal in taking things seriously!"

"And that's probably why you're the only one without someone! There, I said it," Yukiko stopped and spun around to face Fuji. "Exactly what everyone was thinking. Namiko's got more sense than you friggin' do sometimes, Fuji!"

"What's the sense in being serious?" Fujiko asked, her voice dropping quietly. "I tried to be serious, and I didn't like it… It just made me sad most of the time. Now why don't we go visit with Ari-chan and Max-chan? Their car's here."

"At Toshiro's? No way…" Yukiko glanced out the window to see the familiar police cruiser, and rocked the baby in her arms. Seeing her arms full, Fuji opened the door and walked out, venturing back into Toshiro's to see the men as well, as Odori and Nancy and baby Namiko in the living room, several boxes of pizza and soda bottles spread about the room.

"Hey, guys! Party and we weren't invited?" Fuji laughed and sat herself on the arm of Max's chair.

"Fuji…" Leo started warningly.

"Fuji, could you please leave me alone?" Max asked quietly.

"Aww… Rough day?" Fuji kissed Max on top of the head and patted him. "You look cute in that blouse…"

"Fuji, could you lay off him?" Leo asked with a stutter.

"Oh, he likes it when I joke around with him…" Fuji laughed and leaned closer into Zenigata. "Don't you, Maxie?"

Max rose from the chair and walked out of the living room calmly enough. It wasn't until he was out of the room and away from the children did he kick a nearby end table, sending it flying from one end of the walkway to the other.

"Maxwell…" Leo jumped out of his chair and ran to Max, nearly falling over the table. "Where are you going? Why the hell did you even do that?"

"Just… Shut UP!" Max shouted and grabbed onto the door handle. "Would you just shut up? I'm fine!"

"Where are you going?" Leo asked sternly.

"I have a mother, and it's not you, Ari," Max hissed and opened the door, and then slammed it behind him.

"….I love you, you know that, right, Yuki?" Toshiro murmured in a wide-eyed whisper.

"I know," Yukiko sighed and kissed him briefly. "And they love one another, but…. What in the hell happened?"

"One of his ex's died," Toshiro answered, looking to Jordan and Odori, who had remained silent through all of this.

"….You're kidding…." Fuji muttered and slunk down into the seat Max had been sitting in only moments ago.

"Nope…. Right in front of him," Jordan leaned forward and clasped his hands together. "We're thinking it the same guy."

"Your brother!" Fuji gasped.

"My what?" Toshiro blinked.

"I… God damn it can you never keep your mouth shut? It's a good thing you and Zenigata never ended up together… God only knows what a loudmouth you two could've made."

"I'm going after him," Fuji decided, and rose from her seat.

"No, let me…" Leo began to walk toward the door, then was touched on the shoulder by his sister.

"Ari… I'll be fine…" Fuji gave a smirk and walked out of the house, and found Max atop his car hood, his chin touching his knees. "Hey, Inspector. Feel like arresting me?"

"Not now, Lupin," Max grumbled.

"…You looked like you wanted to hit me in there, Zenigata…."

"I considered it," Max grumbled. "Why do you even care about me, huh? This isn't any of your business."

"Ohhh but it is," Fuji hopped onto the car hood beside Max and patted him on the knee. "This guy's going to go after our dear sweet Yukiko in time, I fear… She's part of this, too."

"What? How?"

"Your friend contracted a killer, right?"

"How in the hell did you even—"

"I have my sources… Anyway, that isn't important… What is it that it's the same guy who killed someone that was close to Toshiro. So, yeah, this is my battle too, Zenigata. We might not always get along, but when someone hurts my friends, I hurt them. That's how I play my game… Dad was the same way."

"And there's no treasure involved in this?"

"Welllllll maybe there's a teeny, tiny matter of something…" Fuji gave a sly chuckle.

"I knew it…."

"Oh, it's nothing!"

"Don't expect me to look the other way for that, Fuji."

"Who? Me? Awwww c'mon…. Let's go inside! Before everyone eats the pizza on us!" Fuji jumped off of the car and pulled Max off.

"You're like a child…"

"Yeah, I get that a lot."

"I kind of like it sometimes," Max admitted.

Later that night:

Jordan sat up in bed and brushed his hair back, and let out a sigh. Sleep didn't come easy to him, especially in recent months. He nearly tripped over Odori asleep on the floor, and felt the joints in his knees pop as he walked down the flight of stairs and into the kitchen. He stopped at the sound of someone downstairs, in the kitchen precisely, and continued to slowly creep down, straining to hear the female voice.

Nancy was pacing back and forth in the kitchen on a cell phone, and stopped in her tracks as she heard the sounds of someone on the stairway. She peaked her head through the doorway and met eye-to-eye with the elder Lupin, and quickly muttered into the phone, "I have to go." She then slowly slid the phone into her pocket, not taking her eyes off of Jordan.

"No, no I don't trust you," Jordan said quietly.

"I never asked you to," Nancy replied, and brushed past him on her way up the stairs.


	38. Don't Fear the Reaper

DISCLAIMER: Don't own it. Haven't owned it for the past 137 chapters I've typed, and I still don't own it. So quit asking me, damnit. Yup, that's right, that's how many chapters you've read, friend, at an average of ten pages a chapter.

O-kayyyy…

Ari gay? Hot, or even… 'Okay, we'll bite, yeah'. Fuji gay? BRING ME THE HEAD OF J. LUCY-DAISUKE ON A PLATTER! Ehehehe ; I get it, I get it—It'd be weird seeing Fuji with a girlfriend… Made me start thinking of what other weird possible pairings there are out there. Not like I'd go through with any, but, hey, I thought of some interesting combos. Nothing I'll share, but just think about it… Yeah, some of them made me kinda sick, too. Enjoy!

Fun fact of Boredom: While we're on the subject… Fuji and Ari themselves are basically the way they are (ambiguously playful and straight-up gay) because much like their father, who, in his heyday (the ancient time period known as the Sixties) they're representative to the sexual revolutions occurring in their time periods. Like how Lupin the first was suavely debonair and an all-out ladies' man in his turn of the century novels, or Lupin the Third was open to… Well… Anything with legs and long hair that wasn't Goemon (unless you're into that kinda thing), Fuji and Ari prettymuch represent the openness in this generation to more sexually 'take-charge' types of women and homosexuals… Whew… I'm going to go catch my breath. See ya!

Chapter thirty-eight: Don't Fear the Reaper

"And this is the last production she was in before leaving on maternity leave," Toshiro said as he and Nancy filtered through another pile of memorabilia while Saiyuri slept on in her crib. "You can have one of the playbills… She always saved a ton from anything she did…."

"Really…. This… This is all too much," Nancy said with a shake of the head.

"You're practically family, it's nothing!"

"Hey, what's this?" Nancy tugged on a piece of fabric that lie on the bottom of the trunk, and pulled it out to reveal a Victorian era gown.

"That's where I put that thing…" Toshiro muttered and rose to his feet. "That's from _The Sound of Music_… She played Maria…"

"And you were Von Trapp, I'm guessing…"

"No, actually… I played a Nazi… And if need be a nun… But that's a different story," Toshiro answered with a sigh, and Nancy gave a chuckle. "Where are you going?" he asked as Nancy rose and walked into the hall.

"I'll be right back!" Nancy reassured him with a smile, and was soon out of sight. Toshiro shook his head and continued to filter through the things he had kept, not realizing that there was so much. He couldn't help but to wonder what Yukiko's reaction would be if she were to see the three large trunks… But he had indeed spent a great amount of time with Julia, so there were bound to be numerous articles of the relationship left over.

"How do I look?" Nancy stood in the doorway now, and quickly drew the samurai out of his deep thoughts. Toshiro nearly fell back as he thought he saw who he first thought to be Julia, and then realized it was only her sister.

"Wow… J-just like her," Toshiro sputtered.

Down the hall, in one of the guest rooms, Max Zenigata-Lupin leaned outside an open window and took another drag of a cigarette as Leo lay in bed, and, as far as Max could tell, dead asleep.

"I could've saved him…" Max grumbled and flicked the butt of the cigarette out onto the concrete below. "Damn it… Why couldn't he have just come to me in the first place?"

"Hey, Dirty Harry, you done with the exposition?" Leo yawned and rolled over. "Max…. There was nothing you could have done for him, er, her… Urm…. Anywhere, you didn't know that there was a guy there who was going to kill him. So just get some sleep, all right, honey? You can't help people who don't want to be helped."

"You didn't want my help," said Max with a wry smirk. He rose and laid down on the bed beside Leo, and looked upward at the slowly rotating fan above him.

"I was different," Leo murmured. "I didn't wear heels, for one."

"I'll bet you'd look nice in them if you tried…"

"Shuddup," Leo grumbled, and huddled down tighter in the comforter. "One thing I won't do is crossdressing… Well, where it doesn't help our case. We've got an early flight tomorrow."

"I'm going to get a glass of water," Max rose suddenly, tossing the covers aside.

"Go to sleep!" Leo moaned and threw the pillow over his own kid. "You're worse than Avery when it comes to being needy!"

"I'll be quick," Max sighed and kissed Leo upon the cheek, and then walked downstairs to the already-lit kitchen.

"I don't get why he doesn't love me anymore! I mean, when you say you love someone, you mean it, right!"

"Er…. Right…." Yukiko answered uneasily.

"Gimme that damn bottle!" Fujiko growled and grabbed the wine bottle from Yukiko's hand, and took another swig.

"….What in the hell did you do to her?" asked Max, drawing his bathrobe closer.

"She was like this when I found her," Yukiko shrugged.

"Maybe I'm not pretty…. Do you think I'm pretty? You wear a suit, you're almost a guy!" Fuji had meant to point to Yukiko, but instead an unsteady hand fell upon Max. "Wait a sec… Well, you and I go back anyway, Zenigata, hahahaHA! Watcha think? I'm pretty?"

"Fuji," Max began warningly.

"Nah… prolly not…" Fuji shook her head and chuckled. "You chose Ari over me, after all…. Over ME! You got any friggin' idea what that's like, huh? Nah, 'course you don't… My dad just screwed your mom… But that's a wholeeeeee different story, ain't it, Maxie?"

"What in the hell is she talking about?" Yukiko asked, looking above her fedora to Max.

"Nothing, she's talking about nothing. She's just drunk," Max answered, giving a glare to Fuji.

"Hehehe…. Nah, nah, it's a great story, really!" Fuji waved her hand and gave a wave of the hand. "You see… This one time, in Cagliostro…"

"Fuji!" Max grabbed her by around the waist and pulled her up from the chair. "Come on, it's bed time!"

"No it's not!" Fuji murmured drunkenly, pushing him roughly.

"Yes, yes it is!" Max growled. "Yukiko, help me pull this dumb bimbo upstairs!"

"Ur, I… I guess… Here, Fuji… Christ, you stink of beer!"

"Well… You stink… 'Cept not like beer!" Fuji gave a long snort of laughter and allowed Yukiko and Max to drag her up the stairway. "Mmm…. Max, you're looking cute tonight…"

"Go to sleep, Fujiko," Max grumbled and kicked open the door for Lupin. He then laid her on the bed, and turned away as Yukiko removed Fuji's jacket and sandals and shut off the light for the drunk woman.

"You wanna talk about it?" Yukiko asked as she looked at Max, who now stood outside the doorway, leaned against the wall of the hallway.

"Only if you want to pour me a drink," Max answered with a smirk, tilting his head downward. Yukiko gave a nod, and pulled out a bottle of Vermouth from the refrigerator and opened the sliding glass doors to the porch.

"What about glasses?" asked Max, closing the door behind them.

"I don't wear 'um," Yukiko answered with a shrug, and seated herself on the wooden porch steps, and pried off the cork from the bottle. "You want the first hit?"

"What the hell?" Max shrugged and took the bottle from Jigen-Ishikawa, and took a swig from the bottle, followed by a shudder.

"So what was all of that crap she was spewing back there?"

"I slept with her in Cagliostro…. That was the most awkward hour of my life."

"An hour? Yeesh, shoulda married you…"

"That included the argument, dinner, a half-bottle of wine and twenty minutes of silent regret," answered Max, passing Yukiko the bottle. "That's when I prettymuch figured out that I was gay."

"Woah! Fuji turned you gay?" Yukiko snorted and threw her head back, laughing.

"Hey, there's more to it! Don't pretend you know me!" Max shouted as Yukiko took her turn with the bottle.

"Did I say I did?" Yukiko asked, wiping her mouth and passing the bottle to Max. "As I recall it, Zenigata, the last civil discussion we had was me trying to get you to climb down from the tree you had shimmied up onto. You were about five, at the time."

"Maybe that's good, then…"

"What?"

"That we don't know one another," Max shrugged. "I haven't bitched to you about everything I have with everyone else, yet…"

"Nah, I just hear," Yukiko shrugged.

"Like what?" Max asked, taking the bottle from Yukiko and sipping the Vermouth and then looking at her with a frown.

"That you think the world owes you everything 'cause you're mixed race, and that you throw tantrums worse than your dad, and you have more insecurities than Woody Allen on a bad day."

"Glad to know I'm loved in the family," Max murmured darkly.

"Hey, you ain't so bad," Yukiko shrugged. "You've got a great family, and you've got a lot going for you… We both do."

"You sound unhappy when you say that…"

"Eh, I'm still getting used to the motherhood thing," Yukiko answered. "Hey, what's that?"

"Hrm?" Max shot his head up and looked about, frowning at the noise of the rustling.

Yukiko reached into her holster, and drew out her magnum, "Hands up!" she shouted, but this did not stop the visitors in the trees from throwing sharp metal throwing stars in the direction of the mobster and the officer. Both ducked out of the way in time, Yukiko pulling Max to the ground and firing while the strangers hopped out of the trees and disappeared into the dark night. The sounds of Saiyuri and Namiko crying from the noises of the gun shots soon broke the silence, and both Max and Yukiko rose from the ground, Yukiko picking up what remained of the unharmed bottle of liquor and downing half of the remaining contents, then passing it to Max to finish up.

She turned about and headed up the stairs, where she was at first alarmed by the fact that it only appeared to be Namiko's screaming. She then inhaled a substance from a white haze that had filled the entire second level of the house, and broke into a wild cough. She pulled the red handkerchief from her jacket pocket, and began to rush through the room. First she found Odori and Jordan knocked out from the fumes, along with Namiko, who lay sleeping in Odori's arms. Then there was Leo, slumped over his desk, and Toshiro, who was passed out on the ground in their room.

Saiyuri's crib was empty.

"Saiyuri?" Yukiko shrieked. "SAIYURI! Come on, baby…. Cry…. Please! Do something!"

"What's going on?" Max coughed, falling into the doorway of the room.

"Open some windows," Yukiko answered, looking through the closets and drawers, and even resorting to knocking down a dresser, while Max ran through the house, ventilating it.

"Wha… Yuki?" Toshiro rose and clutched onto the back of his head. He glanced down at his hand at what he thought to be at first red dye, but upon further grim realization, he recognized as blood. "What's going on?"

Yukiko grabbed Toshiro by the gi collar, and pulled him up from the ground. "Someone stole Saiyuri… Why in the HELL weren't you watching her? You were supposed to be watching her!"

"Yukiko, I—"

SMACK! And Yukiko then turned away from him and hurriedly picked up a red backpack, the one she kept full of her ammunition.

Jordan, Odori and Leo had all been awoken in time to watch Yukiko deck her husband, and Jordan attempted to hold Yukiko back as she stormed out of the room.

"Listen, Fuji's gone, too…. Maybe she's with them. Come on, there's got to be some clues as to where they are!" Jordan suggested, placing his hands on Yukiko's shoulders.

"Get your hands off of me… Unless you want to wind up… Like him…" said Yukiko with gritted teeth. Jordan did promptly, and watched her storm down the stairs and out of the house. Then there was the sound of an engine revving, and then the sound of tires squealing.

"She stole my car!" Max shrieked as he stuck his head out of the window. "That thing can't go at that speed!"

"But it's got a cop siren on it," Leo added. "She probably realized that."

"I didn't mean for them to take her…" Toshiro answered, slowly rising from the ground. "What in the hell have I done?"

"It's all right, man, we all screw up," Jordan said reassuringly. "I'm willing to bet it was your friend who had something to do with this."

"I'm such a moron…" Toshiro growled in his own self-loathing.

"More than likely. But come on, we've got to get organized," Jordan looked over his shoulder to Leo.

"Right," Leo nodded and took a step forward. "We'll take the Vespa… I can drive motorcycles pretty well, and that tracking device Max put on Fuji ought to come in handy, if she hasn't found it, yet."

"That's one thing I love about her when she's drunk," Max said with a smirk, pulling out a small hand-held device. "I'll bet dollars to driedels she's on the heels of whoever took your daughter… We'll get her back."

"Toshiro, grab your swords, and come with me and Jordan," Odori added. "What? What's wrong?" she asked, blinking at her brother's expression after she had finished saying this.

"She took my swords, too," said Toshiro in a low voice.

"Crap…" Jordan covered his face and refrained from saying exactly what he felt in front of the panicked father.

"Then take Zantetsuken," Odori handed him the plain-looking sword and gave a nod. "I hope she will help you out in some way."

"Odori, are you sure?" asked Toshiro and he looked over the sword. "Don't you need this to fight?"

"It isn't the weapon, it's how you use it," Odori answered.

"Come on, I think we can catch up to Yukiko if we leave now," Jordan said, waving to the group. "Max, Ari, we'll follow you two."

"Right," both nodded, and ran down the stairs, Leo climbing onto the Vespa and Max ironically riding bitch on the yellow scooter.

"So you have any idea where she is?" Leo shouted over the engine to Max.

"Here," Max pointed to a small bleep on the radar he carried, and Leo gave a roll of the eyes.

"Yes… Because grids are so easy to read when you're wanting street directions…" Leo sighed. "Can you read it out to me, Max?"

"Urm… A left up here…"

"That's a river!"

"The radar knows no lies…"

"You also buy cheap!" Leo sped over the bridge covering the river, and watched something glint in his rearview. He quickly made a 180-degree turn, nearly knocking Max off of the scooter and causing Jordan to shriek his brakes.

"There's space beneath there," Max explained, driving down the embankment, and finding a familiar red purse, which, held inside it, Fuji's tracking device.

Max sighed and shut off the radar, then placed it in his jacket pocket while Leo slung the purse over his shoulder and began to drive forward, having no idea know where they were going, or where Yukiko, Saiyuri, or Fuji were.

Manhattan:

"Ugh…" Fuji arose with a pounding head to the sound of heavy traffic and a crying baby. She sat up, and noted immediately that her legs and hands were bound. She pushed open a small compartment from a ring she wore, and began to saw away with the tiny blade that emerged. She stopped briefly as she heard footsteps from outside the dark door, and resumed as they faded. She then slid over to Saiyuri after undoing her wrist bindings, and lifting up the baby.

"Shhh…. It's okay," Fuji whispered to the infant. "Come on, it'll be fine… Your mommy and daddy'll be here soon, and until then, Auntie Fuji will take care of you…. How in the hell's Auntie Fuji going to manage, though? She can barely take care of herself, most of the time." She leaned forward, the baby still on her lap, and sawed through the ropes upon her legs, and stood, cradling the baby. "I know, you're hungry, and probably tired," Fuji said apologetically.

"Isn't that sweet?" she heard with a chuckle, and jumped with surprise. She looked upward and saw the woman whom Toshiro had been speaking with earlier, along with a man whom she now knew well.

"You touch this baby…" Fuji said in a warning growl.

"We won't… If anything, this child will be raised to carry out the pact which Goemon the Fourteenth broke…. My only qualm is that it's not male," the woman said with a discontented sigh.

"It's not even an 'it'," Fuji snapped, and turned away from the two. "Listen, I'll work for you guys if you let this baby go. I'll do whatever you want, you have my word as a Lupin. I will work for your clan, if necessary."

"Whoring it out to the end," said the man with a chuckle. "We couldn't care less about you, Lupin, and the only reason you're not dead yet is…. Well, there is no reason, now is there?"

"My own amusement," the woman smirked, and drew out a long sword. Fuji reached for her gun, and gasped as she found it missing from her holster.

"Looking for something?" the man took a step forward, and out of the shadows Fuji could not only see her gun in his hand, but Toshiro's two swords strapped to his back. "Go ahead, try to shoot me." He tossed her the gun, which Fuji caught with her free hand, and she held the baby close to her chest as to block the sound as she took shot. The tall Asian blocked this with one of the swords, which caused the bullet to ricochet.

"Not bad!" he laughed, looking down at the scrunched bullet. "Did a Jigen teach you to shoot like that?"

"No, a Lupin," Fuji blew the smoke from the gun, then attempted to quell the screaming infant.

"Heheheheh…. HAHAHA! You're using that baby as a shield, aren't you!" the man laughed aloud loudly. "You really are pathetic, when it comes down to it. Now why don't you put down the infant, and we can't make it a fair fight? Here, I'll even put away one of the swords, to even the odds.

"No, thanks. I don't trust your creepy wife over there. You know, the flat-chested one?" Fuji admitted with a smirk.

"You BITCH!" the said woman shrieked. "Kill her now! She's just a pest, anyway!"

"Not yet," the man smirked, and pulled Fuji buy the back of the hair. "You're quite pretty, Miss Lupin. Why hasn't some boy stolen you away yet?"

"'Cause I do this!" Fuji answered, and kneed the man in his weakest point. He doubled over, and Fuji began to back away, while the woman lunged forward and grabbed one of Toshiro's swords from her husband.

"I'll show you to mess with the Rat Clan!" she yelled, and lunged for Fuji with the sword. It pinned Lupin by the jacket against a wall, and Fuji quickly slid out of this and ducked away from the blade.

But soon the man recovered, and placed Fuji in a headlock.

"Now kill her, Jirokichi!" shouted the woman frantically.

"Jirokichi?" Fuji blinked, and a smirk grew from her lips. "So, you're the younger brother, huh?"

"I'll take her into a holding area," Jirokichi pulled Fuji out of the room, by the neck, while his wife looked on with contempt for both. Jirokichi led Fuji into a small, windowless room. "So you know my brother, then."

"Well, duh, I work with the guy and he's the only man in my gang I haven't knocked boots with aside from my brother, for obvious reasons."

"Hrm, any reason for that?"

"Redheads freak me out," Fuji answered. "Now why are you keeping me alive? If you've got something in mind, you better do it quick and at least give me a cigarette afterwards."

"The eternal smartass…. No, I saw where Mrs. Ishikawa followed you here, and I'm excited to fight the both of you."

"Yukiko? Hey, now, where's the fun in fighting girls!"

He bent down and grabbed Fuji's chin, and smiled slyly at her. "When they irk me as much as you both have in the past, a great deal. She's here right now, you know, and she's quite angry…. I better go pull out the welcome mat for her. Don't move, now."

"Like I had a freakin' choice," Fuji snapped, and watched as he closed the door behind himself. Fuji gave a small smile, and looked down at Saiyuri, and pulled out from the infant's blanket and small piece of metal wiring. "You're pretty useful for being so small, Saiyuri-kun! I may have to have one of these baby things, myself!"

The baby said nothing in response to this, only squirmed in Fuji's arms.

Yukiko, meanwhile, made no attempts to make her presence unknown to the ninja that surrounded the building. She first shot down the two who attempted to throw shuriken at her, and then shot out a light above one after he made an intricate show of swordsmanship in an attempt to intimidate her. The light fell, and knocked him unconscious, and Yukiko stepped over him nonchalantly.

"Don't get in between me and my kid if you don't wanna end up on my hit list," Yukiko muttered, and stopped as she caught sight of a tall man blocking her path.

"Yukiko Ishikawa…. You know, the last time I saw you, was at your wedding… I sat in the back," said Jirokichi with a smirk. "I sat in the back."

"Did you at least give us a gift for the wedding?"

"I believe a teapot."

"Ah, yeah. I use it as a doorstop," Yukiko admitted. "Now are you gonna give me my kid, or do I have to waste my bullets on you?"

"No need to waste," Jirokichi chuckled, and jumped from the ground, lunging for Yukiko. She quickly pulled out her magnum, and blocked the sword with the weapon.

"How is that possible?" Jirokichi blinked as he saw the magnum unharmed.

"Wedding present from my father-in-law… Made outta the same metal as Izanagi and Izanami, there," smirked Yukiko. "Hey, you wanted fair odds… What's more fair than that?"

"Indeed," muttered Jirokichi. He took a few steps back, and cautiously studied the woman in white, before making another run for her, this time making a cut across Jigen-Ishikawa's shoulder.

"Bastard…" Yukiko murmured with a growl, and glared at Jirokichi.

"Little girl not so tough, now, is she?" Jirokichi laughed. "Well, let's see what else you have, girl."

"Girl? Try giving birth, then call me a girl!" Yukiko growled, and shot at the ninja. He ducked, and Yukiko went to shoot again, but was knocked down with a blow from a long bamboo pole.

"Stupid whore," the woman who had claimed to be Nancy glared, standing over Yukiko with a glare of disgust.

"HONEY…. FLASH!" Fuji called, and tossed out several small bombs that, when contact was made on the ground below, gave off bright flashes of light.

"Damn it!" Jirokichi took his wife in his arm and covered his own eyes with his free hand.

"Cover your eyes, Yukiko-chan!" Fuji whispered as she lifted Jigen onto her shoulder and made off as quickly as possible.

"What in the hell ARE YOU!" Jirokichi snarled after the light and smoke subsided, and Yukiko was nowhere to be found.

"I'm just a small-bottomed girl with small hips and a big bust," Fujiko answered innocently from her hiding spot.

"Thanks, Fuji," Yukiko said hoarsely, sitting up on the roof of the building where she and Fuji had hid out.

"Oh, Yukiko-chan!" Fuji snapped her fingers and smiled. "I've got something for you!" Yukiko only then noticed the squirming backpack. Fuji removed the bag and with a quick flick of the wrist it reverted into a blanket which Saiyuri lie.

"Oh, thank God!" Yukiko embraced her daughter tightly, and looked up to Fuji from beneath her fedora. "I owe you big time for this, Boss."

"Boss?" Fuji jerked her head back in surprise. "Who do we look like, Lupin and Jigen? Go get the others, I'm sure they're on their way now. In a white suit, I don't think you'll have trouble flagging them down."

"What about you?"

"Honey's got a few tricks left," Fuji muttered, and jumped from the roof, onto a metal grating, and began to seek out Jirokichi and his wife. "Now it's my turn to play, Jiro-kun."

Yukiko scampered to the middle of the roof, and knew she was taking a large risk, but still replaced her bullet with a special-made flare, covered her daughter's ears tightly, and shot.

"Hey! I see them!" Max shouted from afar, pointing to the flare off in the distance. Leo signaled to Jordan, who drove closely behind him, and the blond nodded, and hit on the gas, as did his brother, in the Vespa.

"Please be safe…" Toshiro begged beneath his breath as they came closer to the flare.

Fuji was quickly running out of tricks to use against the Rat Clan members while the rest of the group drove to the rescue.

"Heh…. Clever, Lupin," Jirokichi smirked at the obviously tired Fuji. "Will you be all right to stand, or should I grab you a chair, perhaps?"

"I'll be fine," Fuji panted, and rose to her full height. "You have anything else up your sleeve, Jirokichi?"

"No, but she does."

"Wha-Augh… Eh… I…" Fuji's eyes grew wide as the blade entered, and then quickly exited, and stumbled a few feet back to the docks. Leo pulled up just as he watched her fall into the ocean below.

"FUJI! NO!" Leo shrieked and ran from the bike and dove into the waters. Max and Jordan were soon to follow, while Odori and Toshiro searched for Jirokichi and his wife, who were nowhere to be found. Fuji, too, was absent. The only thing that they managed to recover was her choker, which was found bobbing in the water by Max.

France, two days later:

"And… What else can I say? I loved her… I really, loved her," Heiji said with a shrug. "I just…. I wish I could've been there for her."

"Me, too," Ryo said quietly from the church pew. Victor placed his hand over his wife's, and looked away a moment, as if trying to figure the right words to say.

"I… I'm sorry I drug you away from her," Victor said, clearing his throat.

"It's not your fault…" Ryo leaned against him. "It's mine…. I could've stopped it from happening."

"….I…. I'll have to speak to Heiji after this," Toshiro said quietly to Yukiko.

Yukiko turned to him coldly. "As long as it's not me you're going to be talking to, go for it."

"You're acting like I was the one who stabbed her."

"No, but you're the one who let 'Nancy' in… This wouldn't have happened if you'd just done something like check a few facts. A few stupid facts," Yukiko snapped. "When does your plane leave?"

"T-twelve," Toshiro answered, clearing his throat and looking over to his daughter, who slept on, oblivious to anything happening.

"Lupin can't be dead!" Odori shouted suddenly as Heiji exited the podium.

"Dori, this isn't like a wedding, where it's 'speak now or forever hold your peace'," Ally explained, grabbing her by the wrist in an attempt to seat her once again.

"She's Lupin the Fourth, she can't die!" Odori snapped angrily. "She just…. She can't die…. She's Lupin!" Odori yelled, breaking down into tears and falling into her seat, her shoulders bobbing as she cried. Jordan held onto her tightly, and she looked like a child as the tall man spoke to her quietly with small reassuring phrases.

"Jordan, you ready?" Max asked, and Jordan gave a nod. Max then looked to where Leo sat beside his mother, and felt a sense of helplessness which he hated arise in him. First one of his dearest friends, and now a woman he had come to love as a friend, although he would have never admitted it aloud while Fuji were alive. He now regretted that decision. He rose along with Jordan, Leo, Toshiro, Heiji and Ally, and they, acting as the pallbearers, lifted the coffin and led it out of the church, onto into the nearby cemetery. Fuji was buried beside her grandfather as well as he great-grandfather, and the aunts and uncles she had never known.

"H-hey, Dako?" Jared whispered to his 'step-sister' as the coffin was lifted down into the ground. "Urm… W-what do you think happens to her afterward? Do you think she went to a good place?"

"I don't know," Dako answered with a shrug. "Nobody knows, Jared…. You can be the most confident person in the world, and not know," she added as her Uncle Peter read the sermon. "I guess you just have to trust that somethin' good'll come out of it."

"What if it doesn't?"

"Then you just hope you made the most out of what you could, while you could," the little girl answered. She looked at Jared's worried expression, and sighed. "Listen, my mom and dad are with her now, okay? They'll take good care of her."

"You promise?"

"You bet," Dako answered.

After the funeral, there was a reception at Lupin's home, which Odori decided to outrightly avoid. Jordan noted her by the gravesite, and sighed, meeting her by the fresh plot in an attempt to coax her inside.

"Dori, I'd love for her to spring back up, too, but it ain't gonna happen," Jordan sighed.

"Certainly it will!" Odori answered, wiping her eyes. "They never even found the body—"

"That night. A fisherman found it yesterday."

"It's close-casket, though! Perhaps…. Jordan, there still has to be some chance…. If not… What will happen to us?"

"Ryo's second in command in your guys' group, so I'm guessing you'll be taking orders from her, now."

"I only work for Fujiko Lupin the Second!" Odori growled. "I am bushido to no one else!"

"Dori…. Dori, come on…" Jordan sighed, and embraced her. "She's gone, all right? And you'll be fine… It'll all work out, I promise."

A hand then emerged from the fresh dirt, and Jordan Lupin screamed as he had never screamed before while Odori lit up with happiness at the recognition of the hand. "LUPIN!"

"Keep it down!" Fuji shouted from beneath the ground. "And pull me outta here! I can't friggin' stand small spaces!"

"Of course!" Odori dropped her sword at the still reeling Jordan's feet, and pulled out her employer, who was now dressed in a conservative white dress as well as a heavy layer of makeup beneath a heavy layer of dirt.

"Yeesh, if this is how I'm gonna look dead, I better not plan on it anytime soon," Fuji muttered as she examined the dress. "Heya, Jordan," she added, patting her older brother on the shoulder. Jordan, in response, collapsed to the ground.

"….Do I really look that bad?" Fuji asked worriedly, looking down to Jordan and then at Odori. Odori said nothing, but laughed, and embraced her boss tightly around the neck. "Dori! Woah! Choking, choking! Hey, don't tell anyone, all right? And… Get Jordan an ice pack. Looked like a kinda hard fall."

Later that evening:

"Max, you coming downstairs, sweetheart?" Leo knocked upon the door, and gently opened the door to their room and stepped in, quietly closing it behind him and sitting down on the bed where Max lay, his back to the door.

"I'm fine here," Max murmured. "I just need a nap…. Now, if you excuse me…"

"Hey, I'll miss her, too," Leo turned Max's face, and bent down, and kissed him reassuringly. "But we've got to move on, right?"

Max sat up in bed and sighed, his knees touching his chin, "I loved her, Leo…"

"What?" Leo yelped, his voice, reaching an unusual pitch as he did this.

"Sure, I always tried to arrest her… But no one was there for me more than her, other than you," answered Max quietly. "She was one of the first people to give a damn about me, or help me out of a jam. No one had done that before the two of you! Not Noah, not Jake… No one… And for all of that, I should've been able to save her."

"Aw, honey, you're just sad that you won't have a chance to be around someone that great anymore… Guess I'll have to do."

"Even if she was a big mouth, spoiled, and acted like a total brat, I still cared about her."

"Brat!" Leo rose and ripped off the mask, revealing Fuji. Max's eyes went wide, and Fuji quickly jumped atop Zenigata and placed a hand over his mouth to quell the screaming.

"Max! MAX!" Fuji slapped Zenigata-Lupin across the face, and Max continued to stare at her in stunned horror. "It's me…. I faked it…"

"You…. You faked it?" Max reiterated in a mutter.

"I can fake more than one thing, you know," Fuji answered with a smile and a shrug. She was stunned as Max growled and pinned her down by the wrists, and this turned into a laugh. "Woah, down, tiger! I appreciate this, but your hubby's downstairs!"

"I ought to KILL you MYSELF!" Max snarled. "You made everyone worry! Your parents, your siblings—"

"—You—"

"Me! How could you?"

"Listen, Zenigata… Faking deaths is a Lupin tradition. I had to to distract the Rat Clan while I gathered some information and pieced together a plan."

"The… What…. Huh?"

"You're so clueless. That's adorable!" Fuji ruffled his hair and smiled. "I'll explain it to you once I tell everyone."

"You aren't going to go about it the same way, are you?"

"Well, for Heiji, I thought about crashing through a window."

"Always the theatric…"

At the mention of the word 'theatric', a preoccupied Toshiro entered, storming about the room darkly in search of his suitcase. He then stopped, and surveyed the sight before him. Max pinning what looked to be Leo, in a mask that made him look like Fuji, on the bed.

"….That's the last Goddamn thing I needed to see," Toshiro said with a shake of the head.

"Oh, no, Toshiro-chan, it's me!" Fuji chuckled and leaped from the bed. "Here, I can show you something that's real."

"What? No! Fuji… I mean… Is it really?" Toshiro wondered, looking her up and down. "How do we know it's not a trick."

"That hair dye is number 47 red. You dye your hair because not only is it a massive turn-on for Yukiko-chan, but you're gray from all of the coke you did years ago."

"That's common knowledge!"

"Let's see…. Your favorite ice cream's strawberry…. You love Elvis, and your favorite song from him is _Blue Hawaii_."

"Once again… Common knowledge."

"You wanted to name your daughter Aaron if it was a boy."

"Quit playing with me," Toshiro growled.

Fuji sighed, "Fine… I guess this'll do, then…" she tugged on his hair and brought him down her level, and Toshiro's face matched his red hair by the time Fuji let go of her grip.

"You ARE Fuji!" Toshiro whispered. "B-but how?"

"You know, the fun-factor on shocking everyone's warn off by now… I think I'll just go down and explain myself. Oh, and don't look for that suitcase, Toshiro. You're not going anywhere. None of us are, if I have anything say about it."

And with that, she, along with Toshiro and Max, walked downstairs to face the funeral gatherers, and introduce them to the star of the show.

"Hey, Lupin," Max whispered before they hit the beginning of the stairwell.

"Hrm? What's up, Zenigata?"

Max chuckled, and slapped a set of handcuffs over Fuji's wrist, "You're under arrest. Sorry, had to do that once before you really kicked the bucket."

"Well, did it feel as good as you hoped?"

"That and then some."

"Well, what can I say? Everyone who has their first time always has a blast with me!" Fuji said with a classic Lupin laugh and a carefree shrug, all which hid a plan Fuji had spent numerous hours planning already.


	39. Nothing Like a Show on Broadway

DISCLAIMER: Don't own Lupin III, but finally picked up Season 1, Vol. 2 of He-Man. WOO! Yeah, good luck getting me away from the TV now…

You're right, you're not crazy; it was indeed shorter,

And this would've been out a lot sooner, but yours truly took a trip to the hospital last week (I'm fine, though, so don't worry—Please!) and now I'm working my way through exams and the mess of paperwork upon paperwork known as my 'job'. Ah, summer's on its way, and with that more opportunities to write. Thanks to everyone who's stuck with me with through-inconsistent updates over these past few months. With my first year of college beneath my belt, I hope that things only go more smoothly from here. Note the presence of the word 'hope', heh. Please, enjoy!

Fun Fact of Boredom: In the last chapter, you may be wondering about the phrase Fuji utters, 'Honey, FLASH!' it's from a popular 1970's anime that had several incarnations over the years, named _Cutey_ _Honey_. If you can find a translation of the lyrics, you'll also see where Fuji borrowed some of them : ) If you really want an interesting piece of trivia, Cutey Honey and Fujiko Mine were and are voiced by the same Japanese voiceover actress. Well, there's our lesson for the week!

Chapter Thirty-Nine: Nothing like a Broadway Show

"And you're sure this'll work?" Lupin glanced over the plan, to which Fuji only gave a nod.

"Yeah. What do you think about it?"

"I dunno. Ari?"

Leo bent over the table while Avery chewed happily on a pacifier in his arms, "Looks like it'll work….. Sounds crazy, but hey, if your giant duck could work, Dad—"

"Let's…. Not go there this second," Lupin held up his hand for his son to stop, and folded the sheets of paper. "I guess it's settled then, neh?"

"….We're gonna need a lot of high heels," Leo murmured as the baby moaned and struggled in his arms.

"There's actually an opening act to my masterpiece…. Jirokichi's got a brother in the showbiz, so he ought to be used to it…. Right, Toshiro?"

"Hrm?" Toshiro looked upward from his plane tickets, and gave a nod, shoving them in his gi pocket. "And you swear he'll—"

"He'll never bother you again! I've got everyone backing me on this one…"

"Yeah, but how you got Heiji to, I'll never understand," said Lupin with a chuckle.

"Eh, not easy," Fuji admitted, and rolled up her plans. "Dad you sure you don't want to, I dunno, maybe take a part?"

"I'm out," said Lupin with a shake of the head. "In the carefully-edited words of Danny Glover, I'm too damn old for this!"

"Your loss," Fuji sighed and shoved the plans underneath an arm. "Well, Bloom, you want to get ready?" Fuji continued, taking Avery from Leo's arms.

"I guess so… What other choice do I have? Your dead, I don't know if you'll curse me from the grave!" Leo chuckled and pulled on a green accountant's cap.

A local theater:

"Why'd you even agree to meet them!" Nancy hissed to her husband as they entered the darkened theater. "This could be a trap!"

"Shut up. What could they possibly do—Dance us to death? Besides, we have reinforcements!" Jirokichi hissed and scanned the theater suspiciously. "Now where in the hell is she…"

"She's really turning in her own husband?"

"Well, she did seem unhappy with your presence…"

"Aw! Glad you could make it, folks!" said the wavy-haired, ascot adorning usher. "Why don't you two have a seat, eh? The show's about to start!"

"Show?" Jirokichi and Nancy blinked in surprise.

"Mm-hm! It won a Tony, from what I understand…" she added, and handed both a pamphlet. "These are on the house, of course! Where's our concession guy?"

"I refuse to do this…" Victor hissed from the back of the theater.

"Heh, fine, I'll tell Ryo you put premium in her car," Yukiko said with a wicked smile, and pushed Victor out with her foot. "Now get out there and sell!" she whispered, and made her way to the rafters of the old theater.

"You set?" Jordan asked as he looked over the catwalk at the back of the stage, and then back to Yukiko.

"You bet… Hey, what's going on between you and Dori?" Yukiko wondered aloud as she loaded her gun.

"Is this really the place to ask?"

"What? You can't run," Yukiko shrugged. "So… You two… Y'know?"

"You're the last person who should know!" Jordan hissed. "When's the opening curtain go up?"

"When Heiji starts the overture and Ally starts the lights…"

"Go figure they put that guy in charge of pyrotechnics," Jordan murmured. "Did he hate Toshiro, too, or was I the only boyfriend of yours he hated?"

"He hated Toshiro more, if anything," Yukiko admitted, and stopped as the music began. "This is our cue to watch for our part."

"Almost time!" Leo whispered as he buttoned the top button to his suit and leaned forward to deliver a quick kiss to his partner. He then noted Max's frozen appearance, and tilted his head to a side. "Urm, you okay?"

"I get really bad stage fright," Max said with a whisper.

"….Please tell me you're kidding…"

"Does this look like the face of someone who's joking or someone who's terrified?" Max asked gravely.

"Your blokes' cue," Gabe passed by with a clipboard and spoke into a headset he had been given. "Alsenia, everyone set up? Would you two look at this, they gave me one of those headphone thingys! Makes me look distinguished, if you ask me!"

"Come on, we can do this," Leo whispered. "….Do a good job, and you'll get rewarded for it—Promise."

"What do—? Are you talking about what I think you're talking about?"

"Maybe… If you do a good job, then you'll know, now won't you?"

"Ehe… You got it! I'll wow 'um, in that case!" said Max with a pat on the back, walking out to the stage with Leo.

As they took their positions, Fuji found her way to the microphone system, and began in a booming voice which covered the entire theater, "Ladies an gents, we welcome you and thank you to our first and only performance of _Shock of a Lifetime_. We've got it all here tonight, folks…. Popcorn, peanuts, beautiful weather outside and a couple of gay actors—So you know they've gotta be good! Let's hear it for those lovable inspect—Er, producers!"

Gabe called for the curtain to rise, which Odori did with one swipe of the sword, while Gabe quietly motioned for the other 'actors' to take their positions at all of the exits of the theater.

"What in the hell is going on here?" Jirokichi demanded with a growl.

"Shush! This show's harder to get into than _Wicked_!" Ryo said with a whisper, putting a finger to her mouth.

"Always knew Max was light on his feet," murmured Fuji to Jordan as Yukiko as she climbed onto the catwalk an sat inbetween the two, looking down at the duo. "How much longer does their act have?"

"A little over two minutes," Jordan answered. "It'll take that long for the cops to arrive and set up outside, anyway."

"That's right, Max,… Don't you ever want to become a butterfly? Don't you ever want to spread your wings and flap your way to glory?" Fuji whispered as Max sang this line to a mousy Leo, who sat back on an office desk as Max took his turn singing.

"Bloom, don't you realize there's a lot more to you than there is to you!" Max shouted the final line while Jirokichi sat beside Nancy, both looking bemused by this entire incident.

"So this is what you do, Lupin? Treat us to musical theater?" Jirokichi rose and broke into a clap. "Excellent… Simply excellent… Perhaps an encore? I've been wanting to see _The Phantom of the Opera _for quite some time now."

Leo hopped off of the stage, and smiled sheepishly as he removed the green accountant's visor, "Well, you know, I'm not sure if I've got the right pitch for that… But I can show you a phantom, if you want!"

"Is that so?" Jirokichi smirked and drew one of the swords he had confiscated from Toshiro, and took another step toward Leo. Leo then pulled off his costume, revealing a short red dress and denim jacket, and then pulled off what turned out to be simply a mask, and beneath this another mask, this of Fuji.

Jirokichi took a step back at the sight of this, and sputtered, "This is just trickery!"

"Maybe," Leo said in his best impression of Fuji's voice, which was rather close. Jirokichi watched from over 'Fuji's' shoulder as Max did the same, revealing another Fuji-lookalike.

"They're gorgeous!" Fuji giggled and slid down the stairs of the catwalk, and hopped onto the stage, and then in between the two men. "Heya, Jirokichi!"

"Lupin?"

"Maybe," Fuji answered with a shrug. "But they she might be Lupin… Or her…. Or them…"

"Them?" Jirokichi asked with a blink.

"Kichi, look!" Nancy gasped and bolted from her seat as more Fujiko Lupin, Jr. clones emerged from the shadows of the theater.

Jirokichi growled, and began to run for one of the random Fujis, only to have the sword shot out of his hand. And when he then attempted to recover it, Toshiro jumped down from a balcony and grabbed onto the sword, not for a moment breaking out of his run.

"There's one sword," Yukiko murmured from her position.

"I call dibs on the other one," Jordan answered as both continued to watch the fight unfold from the orchestra pit.

"Trying to even the score, brother?" asked Jirokichi with a chuckle as he looked to the seating of the theater, and saw Toshiro balancing himself upon the top of two of the seats.

"The police will be here soon for both of you," Toshiro replied. "There will be no mercy shown for either of you."

"Damn idiot… Just like Goemon…." Jordan looked into his seeker and watched while Nancy stalked slowly behind Max and Leo, creeping toward Fuji with a knife in hand.

"Hey, Leo!" Max smiled as he caught site of Nancy, and blocked her exit from one side. She turned about to exit toward the over door, but ran into Leo's chest. "There's part of our act with forgot?"

"Guten-tag hop clop?" asked Leo with a smile.

"Out of my damn way, or she gets it in the neck!" Nancy growled, lunging forward and grabbing Fuji by the neck.

"Guten-tag hop clop," Max said with an affirming nod.

"Is this really the time for that!" Fuji choked, glancing at the knife at her neck.

This went ignored by the inspectors, who busied themselves in a clapping game, Nancy in between the two. She looked to her right, and then left, and then Leo and Max decked her, with one punch coming from either of the men.

"You morons!" Fuji growled and gripped onto her neck as she hopped away from the fainted Nancy. "I ought to beat you both!"

"I'll kill you for harming my wife!" Jirokichi snarled at the two, and ran forward, his other sword drawn. Moments before he made impact with Leo's skull, however, Toshiro grabbed onto the sword from either side, and motioned for Leo to move, which Lupin quickly did. With him out of the way, Jordan managed to get a clear shot of Jirokichi, and the other sword went flying.

"So you're going to kill a defenseless man, now?" Jirokichi asked. "I suppose then, we aren't that different at all."

"The only thing we share is a family scroll," Toshiro snarled, and stepped to the sword which had landed in one of the cushy theater seats. He pulled it out, and tossed this to Jirokichi. "We finish this right now, no police, no Fuji Lupin clones; you and me, brother."

"Why mother preferred you over me I'll never understand," Jirokichi murmured as he began to circle Toshiro. "Perhaps it's because you reminded her so much of that bastard she fell in love with."

"It's because in the end I was the one who never betrayed her…"

"Why, Goemon? She ordered the death of your family…. I thought I would win her approval for that, at least!"

"Any man who kills a child is a coward. If anything, I would have banished you sooner for what you did," snapped Toshiro, he too beginning to cover his ground from the ever-creeping Jirokichi.

"You have caused so much pain in my life it is—"

"Aw, just shuddup!" Toshiro snapped. "You know, I blamed my father for the same things, but then I matured to learn how to forgive and move on! It is one of the hardest things that someone can ever do—Forgiving. That's a lesson you never have, and never will learn, Jirokichi."

"Would you forgive your brother if you knew he was the one who led me to Julia?" asked Jirokichi smugly.

Toshiro's concentrated features fell, and he blinked a moment in order to register this, and slowly looked to Heiji, who could not make eye contact with Toshiro as his brother's sight fell upon him.

"Oh, for what it's worth, it wasn't on purpose… The little idiot thought I wanted a reunion," Jirokichi answered with a shrug. "It kills me whenever I've overheard you two…. Perhaps I'm not the brother you need to be schooling in forgiveness."

"I hope the ancestors kick your ass," Toshiro growled, and ran forward, as did Jirokichi. The swords clashed, and both men landed upon the ground, but only Jirokichi fell.

"He's just stunned," Toshiro explained, tightening the belt to his gi and retrieving his other sword from the ninja. "And you all can take the masks off. Personally, it's freaking me out."

"Heh?" Nancy blinked, and slowly sat up and looked about, and saw everyone concentrating upon a job well done, and this gave her opportunity to grab her knife, and slip behind Toshiro.

"Watch out!" Heiji shouted, and pulled Toshiro down to the ground just as Nancy released the blade from her hand.

"Heiji? Heiji!" Toshiro yelped as he gripped onto his dazed brother's shoulders, and his eyes trailed down Heiji's back, to see the knife sticking and red oozing through his sky-blue shirt.

"That's it; bitch has gotta go," Yukiko loaded her gun and took aim with Jordan beside her, and pulled back the trigger.

She was about to fire when the theater was suddenly raided by the local law enforcement. Ally was quick to set off his last special affect—Smoke bombs, which allowed not only for time to bind and secure Nancy and Jirokichi, but also offered an escape for the Lupin gang.

"You'll be okay, bro," Toshiro whispered to Heiji as he loaded him in the back of one of the Lupin family vehicles.

"I guess I've seemed like an ass to you, haven't I?" Heiji said with a husky chuckle. "I didn't want to be near you because I always felt guilty about it…"

"We'll get you to a hospital, you'll be fine, I swear."

"Toshiro, I'm so sorry…"

"I know, I know, just hang on…"

The following day, France:

"We are gathered here today to celebrate the life of a great man…" the priest began as he stood over the funeral plot.

"Fuji, this is morbid!" whispered Ryo as both women stood to a side in the distance, away from the mourners.

"What? Funerals are kind of cool," Fuji shrugged as she sat perched at the foot of an angel statue, who overlooked the occurrence quietly, as it usually did. "The food at mine was great!"

"Fuji…"

"Oh, don't be so prudish about it, Ryo-san! Just a funeral! The word 'fun's' in it, so how bad could it be?"

"Very. Not everyone wakes up like you did, Fuji."

"Eh, who told you I woke up?" Fuji hopped off of the foot of the statue and walked toward the exit gates, "Come on, let's grab some drinks! I'll buy!"

"Can't do…" murmured Ryo as she trudged off behind her boss.

"Huh?" Fuji looked over her shoulder to Ryo, and blinked. "Why, what's up? Got to do some repairs? Come on, it's a holiday!"

"I…. I know, and I agreed to go off with Victor for a little bit…" Ryo bit her lip and kicked at the thawing ground. "I hope you don't mind, but—"

"It's fine! You guys are married, after all, of course you'll wanna spend a little 'alone time' together… Just like Leo and Max, Ally and Carmen, Toshiro and Yukiko, Odori and Jordan and Heiji and Veronica!"

"….You're welcome to come, if you want…"

"Nah, I'll be fine! I'll just go bug my parents!" Fuji answered, knowing fully well that her parents had taken a cruise for the weekend, and her siblings had since gone back to their homes as well.

"Fuji, I don't want you to feel like you're left out or anything."

"Ryo-san, trust me, I don't want to get in the middle of yours and Victor's relationship. He's my cousin; it'd be disgusting."

"Fuji…"

"I'll be fine, don't worry!"

"Hey, here's an idea for you, since you're obviously lying… How about you go visit Heiji?"

"Nah, he's a little busy right now in Chicago," Fuji said with a shrug. "I'll probably just bum around and buy myself an Easter bunny."

A hospital in Illinois:

"Erm, Heiji, you awake?" Toshiro cleared his throat and knocked upon the door, and saw Heiji shoot his head up from the computer screen. "I, urm, brought you some things…"

"Easter Basket… Wow, you really are American," Heiji said with a chuckle. "Well, we better get this over with fast…"

"Get what over with?" Toshiro blinked, and watched as Heiji bent down, and pulled his hair away from his neck. "Heiji… What in the hell are you doing?"

"I know this is what you want, Toshiro…"

"Well, I've thought about it, but… No, damn it, sit up," Toshiro snapped.

"How can you even stand me now?"

"What, you were acting like a jerk to me before, and now you're still just as good at it… Nothing's changed, Heiji."

"Toshiro, it's my fault—"

"Shut up and have a Cadbury egg, I know you want to…"

"Well… Just one of the little caramel ones…"

"I just happen to have some of those… A little birdie told me you loved caramel, and I'm not talking about my pigeons."

"Why am I thinking it's a little birdie in a red dress?" Heiji heaved a sigh and turned onto his side. "Maybe it's a little birdie I've got to have a word or two with…"

"Those two first words being 'I'm sorry'," Toshiro added, and seated himself beside his brother's bed. "You've caused a lot of troubles and created a great rift because you were just too frightened of the truth of the matter."

"Are you going to start on a lecture?" Heiji moaned. "Just warn me ahead of time so I can get the nurses in here to up my morphine…. You're just like Dad; he loves a good lecture session…"

"Nah, I'm not going to lecture," Toshiro said, glancing out the window at the miles of trees ahead of them. "Just… Fuji's an airhead, Heiji, but she's got a good heart. Jurgis saw that, so I think you can."

"Jurgis was evil."

"Not always," Toshiro cracked a smirk and sighed. "People change… Look at me and Yuki, for example… It took her years before she wore down and decided to, well, give me a shot… All of those years we could've had, but she was just stubborn…."

"And you were obsessive," Heiji added quickly, and sipped from the glass of Gatorade at his bedside.

"Now let's not point fingers," said Toshiro quickly. "Well, to cut a long story short and to get me home in time, let me just leave you with these parting words…"

"'Heiji, you're a god?'"

"Only in your morbid dreams," Toshiro snorted and stood. "You don't meet someone like her everyday, so don't blow it, Heiji. You might regret it."

"You really know how to lighten up a holiday," Heiji sighed. "But, I'll think about it…."

"Good; now I've gotta rush home while I still can! We're staying at Jigen's place for a little bit, and I don't want to miss the cooking or the free babysitting!"

"Have some potato salad for me!" Heiji shouted as Toshiro hurried out of the room. Heiji then laid back and closed his eyes, and thought over his brother's words; he would not admit for all of the hard drives in the world that Toshiro had actually made some sense.

Later that evening, Toshiro made one last spot before returning to Jigen's home, praying Yukiko was at least in the mood to now speak with him.

"What is it?" Yukiko sighed as he gave a knock upon the door of Saiyuri's guest nursery. She was just setting the little girl down as Yoko and Mako scurried from beneath the crib.

"Oohhhh!" Yoko began.

"You're still in trouble!" Mako added, and the identical twins gave a giggle.

"…I know I'll get over that someday," Toshiro murmured, and pulled out a few bills from his gi, and passed one to either child. "Make your pop go out and buy you somethin' nice, girls."

"All right!" both exclaimed, and nearly toppled the tall samurai as they ran off to find their father.

"That really ain't fair," Yukiko chuckled and shut the door behind them, leaning against it to make sure there would be no further entry or exit. "Now what are you in such a jolly mood about? They have to do blood testing on Heiji and you got to put in the first needle?"

"Nah… We're good," Toshiro answered with a shrug. "I… I'm really sorry about all of… Everything… I could've killed you both."

"Not you, that crazy guy you share genes with," Yukiko answered bluntly.

"Yeah, well… Could you just take an apology for once?" Toshiro muttered, and looked to the baby.

"Eh, I'll do it 'cause I know taking care of her on my own would kill me," Yukiko admitted and stepped over to her daughter's crib. "…Damn it…."

"Hrm? What's wrong?"

"She's gonna friggin' look like you!"

"Well, let's just hope she doesn't act like me," Toshiro added, and placed a hand on Yukiko's lower back. "I'm sorry…"

"Yeah, you really are sometimes, you bastard," Yukiko chuckled, and kissed him on the cheek, then patted him on the hand. "Let's head out before we wake her up… She's had enough excitement until she's, oh, I dunno… Seventeen?"

"Pfft, I'm betting my Vespa that she'll know how to shoot before you did," Toshiro snorted, opening the door for Yukiko. "Hey, picked up something… Thought I might as well show you…."

"Hrm? Crap, what'd you bring home? Another pigeon?"

"Better," Toshiro answered with a smile, leading her downstairs and out the front of the house.

"Holy crap!" Yukiko yelped. "Where the hell's your Vespa!"

"I gave it to Ally," Toshiro answered with a melancholy sigh as he looked over the new Austin Martin. "I hope you like it… Not exactly a mob car, but seats four…"

"Four, huh?"

"Well, you know, just in case… You know how things happen… Urm, I'm gonna go hide the eggs for the girls."

"Wise decision… Better than Dad doing it; last year he thought he put one on a lawn blower and didn't realize it was the chainsaw case."

Outside of Paris:

"A holiday where you clean!" Dako exclaimed in disbelief. "Do you believe it!"

"Hey, he's making latkes. I'd scrub the toilet for those," Jared answered. "And Easter candy, too… I officially have nothing to complain about."

"This is child labor… There've got to be laws against this!" Dako moaned, and resumed dusting above the mantle in the living room. The doorbell went off, and both children ran to the door, only to be beaten by an already-busied Leo.

"Urm, hey…." Fuji gave a weak smile and wave as she looked over Leo, who held in one arm a basket of laundry and in the other a stack of books. "Spring cleaning?"

"Well, since we're all off," Leo shrugged. "Do you want to come in? Urm…. Is everything all right?"

"Yeah!" Fuji gave one of her practiced smiles and sashayed through the door with several bags in hand. "I was just in the neighborhood, and I figured I'd drop off some stuff…" She handed a bag to each child, and they gasped in delight as they pulled out treat-filled baskets.

"Since when do you celebrate?" Leo asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh, I just… I dunno," Fuji sighed and clasped her hands together. "Got in the spirit of things, I guess. What about you, huh? I don't remember you ever getting all gung-ho about it."

"That's before I got bullied into it by Max and the little demons here," Leo seat down his laundry on the coffee table and let the books lie beside them, and took a seat beside Fuji.

"I brought you some, too… And Avery and Max…. Don't let the kids' near Max's, though, I packed in a bottle of Vermouth."

"He's been drinking that an awful lot lately," Leo pulled out his basket and noted the knitting needles and large bottle of Bourbon, and set this on the coffee table as well. "So how's Heiji doing?"

"Urm, wouldn't know," Fuji admitted with a shy chuckle. "I haven't visited him yet… Call me a chicken…."

"Kids! Latkes are ready!" Max shouted from the kitchen.

"YES!" Jared hopped to his feet and jumped over a footstool as he ran into the dining room, Dako trailing close behind.

"Jeeze, should I follow?" Fuji blinked and looked to the excited children then to Leo.

"They like Max's cooking," Leo answered. "He just can't do it much."

"Yeah, looking after me must take a lot out of you!" Fuji smiled widely and slapped Leo on the back.

"Well, might not have to worry about that much more, either…."

"Huh? What the hell does that mean?"

"I got offered a high-end job in Washington, D.C., and there's a school for Avery, too."

"W-what happened to chasing me until I gave up!" Fuji demanded in a small voice.

"That's when you were all I had to watch," Leo answered with a shrug. "I… I've got kids now, Fuji, and someone to look after. I'm a grownup."

"Me, too!"

"Fuji, you still watch Saturday morning cartoons."

"So do you!"

"Against my will," Leo answered tiredly. "I don't think I can keep it up! I don't want to be like Max's Dad…. I don't want to be sixty and be a laughingstock!"

"You're almost thirty and you're already a laughingstock," Fuji said with quick correction.

"I'm not the only one who's going to be thirty, soon," Leo said sternly.

"I… Well, I…"

"Fuji, come on… Decide what you want already. Just don't expect everyone to follow," Leo sighed, and brushed back his hair. "…Would you please stay for dinner, at least?"

"I wouldn't want to interrupt a family thing," Fuji answered, rising from the couch. "Have a happy holiday, Leo…"

"Fuji, wait!—"

"Piss off," Fuji murmured, and closed the door behind herself.

She then started walking… Down the neighborhood, into the cities… She had no idea where she was walking, but had the inkling that it was a long road to nowhere.

"I don't need them," Fuji murmured, "I don't need the Jigens, or the Ishikawas, or the Zenigatas, or the Lupins! I'm looking out for number one from now on… That's how it should've been all along."

"Do you make a habit of talking to yourself?" she heard and spun about to see a man looking over the same bridge as she. "You're kind of cute when you're doing it."

"Any other day I'd have some comeback, but right now I'd just like some 'me' time," Fuji snapped, during away from him and continuing her walk down the sidewalk.

"Don't tell me you were planning to jump," he briefly pulled away the bangs that partially covered his eyes, and smirked. "You're a little too pretty to end like that."

"It doesn't even matter to you! Do you know who I am, buddy!"

"No, and apparently you don't know who I am, either," he answered with a shrug. "I'm Mamoru Pikal."

"Pickle?"

"Close enough," he chuckled then looked down to the ground. "Now I've given you my name, how about yourself?"

"Fuji…"

"Like the mountain?"

"….Yeah…. Now if you excuse me, I'm going to go drink until my heart stops," grumbled Fuji.

"Please, let me at least buy it for you!"

"Wha… Listen, I don't have time for crap right now… If… If what you're wanting is what I think you want, then look somewhere else…"

"Don't worry, it's not. I'm just thrilled you don't know me," he admitted with a chuckle. "It's kind of hard to find nowadays… I take it you don't listen to a lot of pop music."

"I'm more of a TV girl," Fuji admitted. "….You're being really nosy, you know that? Kind of annoying, too…"

"Please, let me at least buy you dinner… What could it hurt?"

"At this point? Anything and everything."

"Heh… Well, I—"

"Oh my God, look, over there! Do you believe it!" a girl's voice shrieked in the midst of the darkness suddenly, and the tired-looking young man shot to attention.

"Hide me and I'll do whatever you want!" he whispered, standing behind Fuji.

"Hey, do you think we could get an autograph!" one school girl giggled happily, pushing a pen and pad of paper toward Mamoru.

"He's not taking autographs now…" Fuji answered quietly, "So why don't you two go stalk Orlando Bloom…. Or whoever the hell it is you kids today like… And take those pretty little notebooks somewhere else, eh? We're busy."

The girls were too stunned to answer to this as Fuji grabbed him by the hand and pulled him down the sidewalk and turned the corner with him beside her.

"I don't know that much about you, Fuji, but I love you," Mamoru said with a smile. "Please, let me pay you back after that?"

"Well… It is a holiday, and you don't seem all too threatening," Fuji shrugged. "What'd you have in mind?"

"I saw a nice grill downtown," he answered, and walked down the sidewalk beside her, neither knowing that from a car farther away sat Leo Lupin, Jared at his side in the passenger seat.

"Dad's going to be pissed at you," said Jared quietly to his father.

"Jared, you told me you wanted to make ten dollars, and you're making it," Leo answered quietly. "You're my alibi, okay?"

"And you're a liar."

"Well… It's not really a lie…" Leo set down the binoculars and leaned back in his seat. "I'm just watching out for Fuji, is all."

"Hey, Papa, what happened to the crazy guy? The one who tried to kill Yukiko?"

"You know, I honestly have no idea," Leo admitted with a shrug, knowing this to also be a lie. He knew for a fact that after their capture, Max had given Odori access to their holding cells, and she had made quick work of both. To say that this had strained their relationship slightly had been an understatement, and Fuji's running from their home had not helped it any. "They're probably in Japan by now, Jared."

"What are you doing?" Jared blinked as he watched his father pull out a small computer console hooked up onto the squad car's dashboard and began to type in information.

"Trying to find out who the hell she's with…"

"Did she ever do that to you?"

"She pushed me into most of my relationships," Leo admitted, scanning in a photograph of Mamoru he had managed to shoot.

"Even yours and Dad's."

"Jared, you will make an excellent inspector one day, because you're a natural at asking tons of questions…"

"Nah, I'm gonna be a ninja," Jared answered with a shake of the head. "Hey, I know him! Dako's got a picture of him on her wall!"

"What?" Leo blinked a few times, and looked to the photograph, then to Jared. "Why don't you call her and ask her about him? An actor? Fuji?"

"Hey, Dako… Yeah, I know… Oh, you better not have eaten them all!" Jared gasped. "Hey, who's that guy you have on your wall? The fruity guy with the keyboard."

"Jared!" Leo hissed at the word 'fruity', but was cut off by Jared's raised hand.

"Mamoru? What's he? No, I don't know… I don't listen to music like that! Some of us in this family aren't gay, you know!"

"Jared," Leo repeated more sternly.

"Fire 4? Oh, so they're flamers," Jared said with a nod, and Dako's screaming in response to this was even heard by Leo. "Woah! Sorry—Yeesh! Hey, I've got to go, you're breaking up! Bye!"

"She knows him?"

"…Yeah, Papa, she knows him…. She worships him, apparently," murmured Jared, looking down at the cell phone and then set it aside. "He's a musician, she said…"

"A musician… I thought he looked familiar…" Leo placed his hands on the wheel and paused a moment in thought. "I'm wondering if I should stick around… Maybe just for a little bit more…"

"Pop, she'll be fine, I'm sure of it!"

"Hm, you're starting to sound like your dad," Leo reached over and ruffled Jared's hair, and started up the car. "She ought to be fine, you're right… Plus she's always telling me I don't leave her alone enough, so, damn it, I guess this is my first step, huh?"

"In like what, a twelve-step program?"

"….Just like your father," Leo reiterated with a shake of the head. "You and Dako spend too much time wit him… I need to take you guys camping, or something… Come on, let's get back home, while the food's still hot."

Meanwhile, Fuji looked over her shoulder as Leo drove by, but thought little of it, and turned her attention back to her last-minute 'date' as he opened the door to the Italian restaurant for her and then seated them in a corner of the restaurant.

"Jeeze, I can't even remember the last time I've been on one of these… And I didn't even have to put on makeup," Fuji muttered as she looked about at the restaurant.

Mamoru simply chuckled and lifted up the menu, and blinked as he heard Fuji's cell phone suddenly sound.

"Who's that?" he inquired, leaning forward and motioning for a waiter.

"It's nothing," Fuji shook her head as she looked over the familiar number and shut the telephone on Heiji. "Just one of my brothers… They're all pains."

"Wish I knew how that was," Mamoru admitted, and pointed to the bottle of wine on the menu he thought best fit the evening. "My dad was an entertainer…. He never really had a lot of time to have a bunch of kids around."

"What about your mom, eh? Never left him?"

"Thought he was dead for a while," admitted Mamoru. "That's a long story I really don't want to go into over dinner, though."

"The beauty is that you don't have to," Fuji answered, sipping her water. "What'd your dad do, anyway? Was he a musician like you?"

"Nah, he was a magician," Mamoru answered. "What about your dad?"

"Repossessions," Fuji answered quickly. "Same went with my mom. They were busy a lot, too, but always had time for us."

"Like I said, lucky. Well, here's to hoping that we're never as busy," he said, raising his glass of water.

"I'll drink to that, whether it's with water, wine or Fanta!" Fuji added, tapping glasses with her newfound friend.


	40. Piano Man

DISCLAIMER: J. Lucy-Daisuke: 50 Irish, 15 sadist and 100 not the owner of _Lupin the Third_.

Happy hell week, dear readers!

Okay, folks, got a dilemma here… I'm approaching upon fifty chapters in this series, and I'm wondering if I should divide this story into another part and continue… Because, well, I like these characters, and I don't want to let them go just yet. So what do you think, another part? You guys are the readers, it's just as much yours as mine, and I'd love to hear your opinion on it. Even if it's just short responses like, "cut" or "keep". Thanks a million, folks, you know I'm a feedback whore. Feed my ego, give me some direction. Oh, if you like this story, there's another chapter in the story _Second Hand Crimes_, which essentially works with the same characters. Happy readings!

Fun Fact of Boredom: Lots of ideas have gone through, and, well, not all have made the cut. Some have ended up as _Scrapbook Stories _(the redheaded stepchild of my writings) and others have just been scrapped. Amongst them—Jigen meeting Ming's brothers (ran out of time and I felt like I was introducing a new family member every other chapter at that point), something which involved a clone of Lupin (yeahhhh that was one of the more bizarre ones) and an arc paying even greater homage to _The Producers_, with Leo and Max hiring actors to disguise themselves as the Lupin gang so they could finally get a break (sounded a bit too devious for them).

Chapter forty: Piano Man

"This is where you live?" Fuji whistled as she stepped onto the marble floor and looked around at the Italian art pieces decorating the large main room of Mamoru's home. "This is better than my parents' place!"

"Yeah… I get told I have pretty decent taste, for a straight guy," Mamoru chuckled and shut the door behind them. "Let me pour you something to drink."

Fuji gave a nod and continued to wordlessly tour the home, walking up to a staircase and stopping short as she saw it led to nothing except for an area where a floor should have been. The walls on either side were lined with doors, but the floor was mysteriously absent.

"Come on," Mamoru chuckled and walked up the stairs and headed toward the hole at the foot of the stairs.

"What are you, crazy!" Fuji shouted, and watched, stunned, as he walked out onto the air. "Wha… What the?"

"Glass," he chuckled, and kicked lightly upon the floor. "Come on…"

Fuji pulled down her skirt and gingerly stepped out onto the glass. "Please tell me you don't have anyone working downstairs here."

"The maid only comes on Tuesdays and Thursdays," he answered and spun Fuji about on the glass.

"Jeeze, do you have any more tricks!" Fuji laughed with amazement.

"A lot," he answered in a lower voice, followed by a pause between the two. Mamoru then held up the wine bottle to Fuji. "Urm, drink?"

"Love it," Fuji answered, and walked back down the stairs with the musician by her side.

Seoul, Korea:

"Well, this was nice of her, I guess…"

"Thank you for going through this with me," said Odori with a sigh just before opening the door to the penthouse and immediately falling into the embrace of her twin.

"Mi Noh!" Young-Lee squealed. "And her cute boyfriend! Still a boyfriend, right?"

Jordan looked offward and gave a nod after a moment, "Yeah, still a boyfriend… How're you, Young-Lee?"

"Well…" Young-Lee paused a moment, and slowly shut the door behind the two, and burst into tears. "I can't do this anymore! I need a break! Mi Noh, you're GOT to help me, I'm begging you, please!"

"What? Young-Lee, what's the matter?" asked Odori sternly, pulling away from her sister but keeping a light hold of her arms. "Is someone after you? What's wrong?"

"All of this!" Young-Lee answered, throwing her arms up in the air and looking about at the spacious penthouse.

"…The stress must be really killing you," Jordan muttered, glancing over at a fine modern art piece and immediately falling into thief mode as he appraised the painting in his mind, while Odori attempted to calm her sister.

"I… I don't understand," Odori blinked with confusion, and allowed Young-Lee to step out of her grasp.

"Come on," Young-Lee waved, and ushered them into a large living room, and seated herself in the middle of a large, brightly-colored couch that matched the art-deco décor of the highrise, which overlooked the city below. "I've been on tour for months now… This is my first break since we met last… I was hoping to get away for a few weeks."

"Well, why don't you just go?" asked Odori with a shrug, seating herself beside Jordan.

"Contracts," answered Young-Lee, falling back against the cushy couch and nearly disappearing. "I need a stand-in, even if it's for a week… An award show, one concert, and a couple of parties… Just enough time for me to visit the family."

"….I wish you the best luck in your quest, Young-Lee," Odori said after a pause, rising and hurrying to the front door.

"Wait! Please don't!" Young-Lee yelped, beating Odori to the door. "It's just for a week, and I'll repay you anyway I can!"

"You have nothing I desire, Young-Lee."

"Mi Nohhhhhhh…." Young-Lee gripped onto Odori's arm tightly, and gave a pathetic, teary-eyed expression.

"Fine," grumbled Odori, breaking away from her sister. "You're as bad as Fuji, sometimes!"

"Thank you!" chirped Young-Lee, embracing her once again. "You won't regret this!"

"Oh, I have a feeling you're wrong," Odori murmured beneath her breath.

France:

"Hrm?" Leo yawned and stretched, and scratched his head; what time was it? Four in the morning? What was he doing up at four in the morning?

"Probably your damn snoring," Leo muttered as he looked over to Max, who was sleeping soundly beside him. Leo rose and stretched once again, throwing on his purple and gold kimono over his boxer shorts, and shuffled out into Avery's room first to check on the infant and then into Dako and finally Jared's room. He rolled his eyes as he found the young boy cuddling with a martial arts magazine. After wrestling it out of his grip, he flipped through it briefly before stepping of his son's room and into the kitchen.

"What a night," Leo said to himself as he heard the thunderstorm outside and poured himself a glass of juice. There was a flash of lighting, and Leo took the slow thud on the window to be nothing but the rain, or perhaps even some hail.

"Maybe I should bring the car into the garage…" he thought aloud, and set the glass down on the table. Just as he picked up the keys to the front door, however, the glass smashed, and Leo fell to the ground as a force knocked him to the ground. The two children as well as Max came rushing out, and Avery's screaming could be heard from his room. Max quickly pulled Dako and Jared back into Avery's room, locking the door behind them, and began to shoot at the black that had suddenly engulfed the room. After a few moments, the black swarmed out, and Avery's crying subsided.

Leo shakily rose and wiped the blood away from the open cuts on his face and neck, and Max quickly placed an arm about him, and both stared at the dead birds littering the floor.

"Let us out!" Jared shouted, kicking at the door.

"Move," grumbled Dako, who pushed him out of the way and went to picking at the lock. In the middle of this, however, Max swung open the door, and both parents did a quick check of their children.

"Pop, what happened to your face!" a horrified Jared yelped.

"Nothing," muttered Leo. "It's nothing… You two can sleep in our room tonight, all right? Jared, you and Dako set up the crib we have in our room for Avery, all right?"

"I'll clean up your face," Max added quickly, and switched on the light for Leo, and seated him on the shut toilet seat. "What in the hell was that?"

"I wish I knew," admitted Leo, beginning to wipe his eyes. "Ow, Max, hurry, it's getting in my eyes!"

"Yeah, honey, just sit tight," Max whispered and reached for the first aide kit, and began to clean the wounds, pulling down Leo's kimono to his waist in the process. "This'll sting…"

"I'm used to it," Leo muttered, removing his totaled reading glasses and tossing these in the garbage can.

"We'll get you a new pair this weekend," Max replied as he read Leo's annoyed expression. "Who do you think could've done this?"

"Listen, I wish I knew… Ow! Watch it, Max, that hurts! Damn…"

"I thought it didn't hurt…"

"Let's just hope it was a freak accident," said Leo with a sigh, closing his eyes and allowing Max to continue to clean his face from the wounds he had suffered from the attack.

The following morning, Paris:

"Woah, Mamoru, who's the babe!" a guitarist laughed.

"Yeah, and how'd you get her?" the drummer added, laying down his sticks and rising. "Nice to meet you, urm…"

"This is Fuji," Mamoru announced.

"Ohhh a Japanese girl!" the guitarist said with a wide smile. "About time he brought home a homegirl!"

"Or any girl, for that matter," the drummer added, and both broke off into a laugh.

"Why am I thinking brining her here was a mistake, now?" Mamoru rolled his eyes and looked to Fuji.

"Trust me, they're no worse than my gang."

"What, are you a musician, too?" Mamoru asked as Fuji took a seat in the sound room and looked about at the instruments as well as the insulated padding.

"Not really… My friends and I are really into art," answered Fuji, clearing her throat and then falling back in the chair with a yawn.

"Urm, you could go lay down on the couch outside, if you want," Mamoru stepped away from his keyboard and laid his jacket over Fuji's shoulders and smiled downward at her. "I know the drive must've tired you out some."

"Mm," nodded Fuji. "I'll be fine… I'll sleep on the cab ride home," answered Fuji, stretching and shuffling out into the recording studio. "Maybe resting my eyes wouldn't hurt, though…"

Mamoru waited until the door was closed, and narrowed his eyes at the guitarist and drummer. "Either of you touch her and you will most definitely end up like out bassist."

Both men looked to one another nervously, then back to Mamoru, and gave stern nods, "We'll make sure she's not harmed," the guitarist replied.

New York:

"Isn't this more of a Fuji thing?" Yukiko whispered. Toshiro only gave a shrug and adjusted his skirt as Yukiko made sure her hair was tucked in tightly beneath her fedora. "Well, let's get this done with…"

"I always love how enthusiastic you are toward life," Toshiro muttered and clutched onto his swords tightly.

"Hey, shouldn't you not undermine your husband?" Yukiko smirked and smacked Toshiro on the rear, causing him to jerk forward and then look to her with a red-faced glare. "Not so fun on the other side, is it?"

"Why couldn't you wear the dress?"

"Because you fight in a dress, already, anyway. A woman in a fedora's unusual, but a man? Well, it's New York, ain't it?"

"What in the hell?" their contact blinked as they stepped into the diner and seated themselves in front of him. It was difficult not to break out into a laugh, and he only managed not to by sipping his tea. "I knew this would happen someday, I just knew it!"

Toshiro gave a small growl and looked away, tugging at his skirt once more, and Yukiko reached over and took the teacup from Lupin, and silently finished this off.

"Just like your old man," Lupin murmured and shook his head. "You guys ready for this?"

"Yeah, I'm just curious as to why you don't have Fuji or Jordan doin' this for you," Yukiko admitted, leaning back in her chair while Toshiro shuddered from a whistle he had received from a passing sailor.

"Well, Jordan's in Korea, and Fuji I haven't seen in days," Lupin sighed. "I've got a rescue team going after her."

"Rescue team?"

"Heiji, Ryo and Ally," answered Lupin. "Apparently Leo and she had a bad fight on Easter, and he hasn't heard from her since… None of us honestly have a clue as to where she is. So we've got her tech expert, driver and hand-to-hand combat master looking around for her, while you two do this job for me… Yuki, you sure you're ready to—"

"I was ready the day Saiyuri was born," answered Yukiko with a determined smile. "But I thought you weren't into these things anymore, Lupin…. I thought you mainly did government work."

"Well, every once in a while a guy starts to itch for another great heist," Lupin placed his hands behind his head and returned the smile. "But…. I'm a little old for it now. I teach, mainly."

"Teach? Who?"

"A few private lessons to students," he replied. "Anyway, it's sheet music."

"Sheet music?" both yelped.

"C'mon, Lupin—Seriously?" Toshiro laughed. "Couldn't you go down to a store and like, pick up some?"

"Excuse me, Dear, the men are talking," Lupin said with a smirk. "Why don't you go do your makeup, eh? That color's unbecoming on you, anyway."

"Kiss my Brooklyn—"

"Guys, guys! Okay, Lupin, where is it?" Yukiko held up her hands to the two men and sighed as she slowly set them down again. "What's the story behind them, Lupin?"

"Well… They're—" Lupin heaved a sigh as he heard his cell phone go off and glanced at the number. "Great. Knowing her she's maxed out one of my credit cards… One second, guys… Hello, Fujica—Woah, woah! Slow down, Fujiko! What?... Wait, you were cleaning? You clean? Ow, ow, I'm sorry! All right, anyway... What? She's WHAT?" Lupin leaped out of his chair, knocking it to the ground and drawing the attention of the restaurant, and furthering the confusion of Yukiko and Toshiro. "Damn it! I'll… I'll be right over, well, as fast as I can be… No, I don't know how long! I think Ryo's still here, I'll get her to fly me there! Yeah, yeah, I'll bring them… Just calm down, Fujiko, all right? Baby, it'll be fine, I promise… Get Leo and Max to come over and—What? That… That's it; he screws with my grandkids, he's going over the line."

Lupin then hung up the phone and looked upward at Toshiro and Yukiko, "Change of plans, we're going to France."

"Not without a pair of pants, I'm not," Toshiro answered, his deep voice with its thick New York accent once again drawing the attention of the crowd. "What! You guys have never seen a guy out with his husband for the night! Mind your own business!"

"Hehe… C'mon," Lupin grabbed Toshiro by the arm as he exited the restaurant and toward Yukiko, who stood in the doorway with her hands in her pockets. She had distanced herself from the embarrassing rants long before Toshiro had caused a scene.

"Urm, just for the record, I'm not the husband; it's the guy in white who he's married to," Lupin reassured the restaurant before closing the door and running to his car. "Hop in!"

Yukiko did so first, climbing into the passenger seat, while Toshiro opted for the back seat of the Astin Martin, "We've got to stop by the house, first."

"Yeah, and I think I can explain what's going on along the way to guys," Lupin added as he started up the car and backed out of his space. "It's had to have been… Well, over forty years ago, now… So I was pretty young, still."

"You had to be like, thirty, right?" Toshiro chimed in, and watched as Lupin's face reddened.

"I was in…. My twenties…" Lupin answered slowly, in order to keep his composure. "Anyway, there was this guy from the underworld…. Not underworld as in hell, but pretty close, I'm sure of it… He was brilliant…"

Paris:

"So you think the arrangement'll work?" Mamoru stopped the track, and Fuji smiled and nodded lightly as she laid curled up on a couch in the living room of his home. "Glad to see you so enthusiastic," he added with a laugh as he seated himself on the edge of the couch.

"Mm, sorry," Fuji sat up and stretched. "Just enjoying this while I can."

"Hm? Who says you can't enjoy it all of the time?"

"Well, my work… A lot of people rely on me," Fuji answered with a sigh. "I've kind of got to do it for my dad…. If I don't, no one else will."

"I know the feeling," Mamoru closed his eyes and gave a bittersweet smile as he leaned back against the couch. "Kind of like you're being torn, huh?"

"Exactly," Fuji gave a reaffirming nod and leaned against him, not noticing or perhaps not caring that this made Mamoru tense and look to her with great confusion. "I think I've been doing this so long, I'm not exactly sure what I want anymore, except to be the best… 'Cause I hate losing, damn it…. But that's my brother's fault; he always let me win at everything."

"You've got a brother?"

"Sure, you'd love him… Scrawny gay guy… Hopefully you wouldn't love him in that sense, though," Fuji said with a wink.

Mamoru shook his head at this, "What do I have to do to prove to you that I'm not gay or anything like that?"

"Ugh, it's because you're too nice!" Fuji murmured, embracing him and resting her head on his shoulder. "Relationships never work out for me…"

"Yeah? Now that, I have a hard time believing…."

"It's true… My first husband… Well, my ex… Is dead… And the guy I was seeing is probably overseeing a Dell helpline in New Delhi somewhere, by now."

"Okay, that makes two…"

"Well, those were the only serious relationships… If you want me to go into guys I've dated or done other things to, casually, you'll have to put on a pot of coffee, because it'll be a while."

"Third time's a charm…"

"Don't even mention the word 'third' to me," Fuji murmured. "That number just seems to suck away at all of my good karma."

"Ouch… Maybe I _should_ go put that coffee on," Mamoru began to stand from the couch, and Fuji quickly grabbed onto his wrist, and looked upward to him.

"I can think of something better to do…" Fuji answered, standing and taking a step toward him, closing in the gap between them.

Korea:

"Great… They're in there playing dress up and I have Korean television to bide my time with," Jordan muttered as he rested his head with one of hands and flipped through the channels.

"Hey, what do you think!" Young-Lee chirped and pulled Odori out from the bedroom. "Identical twins, eh?"

"I… Urm… Yeah…" Jordan blinked as he looked Odori up and down, and Ishikawa folded her arms over her chest and looked downward at the ground. '_Where… Where in the hell was she **hiding **those!' _Jordan wondered to himself as he noted exactly what Odori was attempting to cover, and immediately proved himself to indeed be part of the Lupin clan with this thought.

"You owe me for this," Odori reminded Young-Li as she looked in the mirror at the outfit, and at her hair. The sight of her hair was enough to make Odori wish to burst out in tears. Once solid black, it now had a few small chunks of blue and purple running through it, which matched the shorts and halter top Young-Li had picked out for her.

"I've got some other outfits for you, too," Young-Lee embraced her sister tightly. "You're the best sister, EVER! I'll find a way to pay you back for this, I promise!"

"You recall out agreement?"

"Oh yeah, don't worry about that!" Young-Lee smiled and held up her hand to Odori as she picked up her suitcase. "Don't worry, Mi Noh, you look beautiful! Now they ought to be picking you up for the photo shoot in about an hour! I left a list of everything on the counter! It's only a couple of days, remember!"

Odori waited until Young-Lee left before she looked in the mirror once again and bit her lower lip, "I've worn bathing suits that had more fabric…"

"You look terrific," Jordan answered, clearing his throat and standing beside her. "Now what was that agreement?"

"It's nothing of importance… I need to find a jacket," Odori cleared her throat and disappeared back into the bedroom. "She's ruined my hair…"

Paris, the following morning:

"Hn?" Fuji heard her cell phone buzz, and lifted it from the dresser, knocking off her purse and its contents. She laid back and flipped this open, and rolled her eyes. "Leo, I'm not babysitting for you tonight," she said to herself, and closed the phone, then rolled over once again and smiled. "Good… Morning?" She sat up as Mamoru was nowhere to be found, and sat in the middle of the large bed, looking around in puzzlement. "He really is a mystery… Guess I'll just have to find you, Mr. Musician…"

Meanwhile, across Paris, Max Zenigata shouted a series of words at the blackened part of the home that Leo had never heard him say; even some of the curses and their combinations were alien to Leo.

Lupin the Third stood beside his son, and lit a cigarette, and passed this wordlessly to Leo, who only nodded and took a drag before passing it back to his father.

"At least it's just the kitchen," Lupin said as he took another puff. "I'll get some of the kids to help you move… You guys can stay with us until it's repaired."

"We could've been killed," Leo murmured. "Maybe… Maybe we should move…"

"I hate to scare you, but it won't make any difference," answered Lupin. "If he's anything like his old man was, he'll chase you down to the ends of the earth."

"W-why! I didn't do anything to him!"

"I guess it comes with the genes," Lupin bent his head down and sighed and Leo's angered expression. "Yeah… You should be mad at me…. But being mad won't get us anywhere, right now. We've got to figure out how to get this creep, and how to get him away from Fuji."

"I tried to call her, but she's either ignoring me or she's in trouble, too," Leo answered with a sigh, and looked over his shoulder at his children, who were being spoken to in a low voice by a fireman. Leo gripped onto Max shoulder and directed his attention to the three, and Zenigata-Lupin nodded and followed him over to the three.

"So what's gonna happen to us, now?" asked Dako in a quiet voice as Max took a seat beside her on the bumper of the fire engine.

"Well, we're going to move in with Grandpa for a while," Max placed an arm about her while Leo seated himself beside Jared and did the same, only with Avery in his free arm.

"We'll get that guy, all right? I promise… We always do," said Leo to his son quietly.

"Except for Aunt Fuji and he friends," Jared added.

"….What's up?" Max looked at Leo's wide-eyed expression of realization at this statement. "Are you thinking of something?"

"Yup," Leo nodded and turned to Max with a smile. "What do you say, do you want to lend a hand?"

"Heh, what else have I got to do, bake cookies?" Max shrugged and shoved his hands in his pockets. "All right, I'm in…. .But what about the kids?"

"You act like we're three!" Dako sighed with disgust and slid off of the bumper. "We love spending time with Grandma and Grandpa, and you two don't need to feel bad about leaving us to work! Hell, Dad's parents stayed home with him and he still ended up screwed up!"

"Hey!" Max shouted angrily. "You know what I said about cursing, damn it!"

"…And you wonder…." Leo said with a sigh and shake of the head as he saw this irony lost upon his husband.

"Well, she does have a bit of a point, there…. Having Zenigata and Natasha around didn't make you try to bite cats less," said Lupin with a sigh.

"You tried to bite cats?" Jared asked through laughter.

"More than once… I spent years thinking he'd end up opening a Chinese restaurant, the way he tormented them," Lupin said with a twitch of the mouth. "Thank God the one was a Manx, already, anyway. Come on, I'll grab you kids something to eat, and then maybe I'll whip out a credit car or two and we'll hit some stores later."

"Awesome!" Jared said excitedly. "Could you get me some shirokin? Pleeeassseee!"

"You're nine, what are you going to do with throwing stars?" asked Lupin with a bland frown. "I've got to get the rest of the gang together, guys, but you take care."

"No, Dad. You babysit, we've got this," Leo placed a hand on his father's shoulder and patted it. "Go spoil the kids… We've got so work to do."

Lupin gave a frown at the thought of being dismissed as a babysitter, and then took Avery in his arms and nodded, "Yeah… Take care, you guys."

"I'm really worried about this," Dako said, and quietly took Jared's hand. Jared cleared his throat as his face reddened from this gesture, and embraced her.

"Don't worry, I'm a ninja, remember? I'll protect you, Ave and Grandpa," said Jared to her quietly. "I might not be the best, but I'm close to it."

"Show off," Dako laughed quietly.

Tokyo:

"Five more minutes," Odori grumbled and rolled over in the airplane seat, and then fluttered her eyes open. "Where are we, Jordan?"

"Urm, your sister's private plane," Jordan answered.

"….I was afraid of that," Odori sat up in her seat and looked to the one across her, and saw Namiko with her dolls spread out onto the empty seat beside her. She had coloring the hair of one doll with her markers, as well as taken numerous rubber bands and made a series of ponytails on the doll's head.

She held it up and smiled, "Momma!"

"Yes, Momma," Odori sighed and shut her eyes tightly. "….Momma's hair… Makes her look like a bad anime character."

"Hey, you look fine!" smiled Jordan, and patted her back. "Now it says on your schedule that…. This is your photo shoot."

"Ugh… And how are you going to get in with me, hrm?"

"I'm your publicist!"

"And Namiko is…?"

"My wife left me on Tuesday, didn't you hear? The bitch took everything, so I can't find a babysitter for my daughter until we're both home."

"Hmph. I suppose you know this means changing diapers, correct?"

"Heh, how hard can it be?"

"She kicks…. Hard," Odori answered gravely as the plane made its final descent into the airport and the three soon boarded off of the private plane and into a limo, and then to a Tokyo photographer's studio.

Odori was the first to walk in, and looked about at the large black and white photos surrounding the walls of the office. One in particular, after she tilted her head to a side and stood there a moment, brought a blush to her as she realized exactly what it was she was looking at.

"Right this way, please," the secretary ushered the three in, and Jordan remained toward the back of the studio with Namiko in his arms while Odori was led to a large white screen the fell and extended to the floor, and she nodded as the photographer began to voice his instructions.

"Now, you stand right… Here," the photographer took Odori by the shoulders and faced her toward the camera, and ran back to make sure she was in focus. "Excellent! Beautiful! Now… How about you turn, eh? Wonderful! Now let's try a few more shots."

He walked back over to Odori at this time led her to a rack of costumes.

"How do I even wear this?" Odori muttered with amazement as she pulled one glittering piece from the rack of outfits.

"Here, I'll show you," the photographer turned Odori about, and within moments had the zipper to her top pulled down. And within three seconds afterward, after a loud scream, the photographer lay on the floor, a part of his lighting laying atop his head, with a large dent running down the side of the pole. Odori zipped the top back up, and stormed out, taking Jordan by the arm along the way.

"You know… I heard divas were temperamental… But they never told me this one was Lucy Lui!"

"Urm… Are you…?"

"I'm fine," Odori snapped, and pulled open the door to the limo. "Come on, let's go. What's next on the list?"

"Urm, hopefully not you kicking someone else's ass," he answered as he cleared his throat and looked over the list. "It says… Well, you're making an appearance at an orphanage."

Odori's features solemned, and she gave a silent nod as she slid into the limo, and then Jordan shut the door behind them as they drove off to their next destination.

France:

"What's this?" Mamoru paused a moment as he stepped into his home and smelt the distinct smell of the oven at work, as well as the sound of something sizzling on the stovetop.

"Thank God for frozen food and Ally's cooking lessons," Fuji murmured as she pulled out a sheet of biscuits and removed the skillet worth of bacon from the stovetop.

"Urm… Hello…" Mamoru watched with puzzlement as he stood in the doorway of the kitchen.

"Hey!" Fuji spun about and waved. "Urm, thought I'd do a little cooking, hehehe…. This kitchen's so clean, it's like it's never been used!"

"It… It hasn't," he answered, blinking once more. "Thank you?"

"Er… This was okay to do, right? I, urm, know some people would freak out, but…"

"No, it's fine… It's wonderful," Mamoru answered as he seated himself at the counter. "I'd love you to do it more… I really enjoy this, Fuji. I know it's been a short period of time, but I would really like it if…."

"Huh? What's up?" Fuji seated herself beside him and tossed aside her apron and oven mitts. "Why so glum?"

"I was wondering if you'd consider staying with me…."

"I already am."

"No, I mean… For longer…"

"Oh! Oh, you mean like, move in with you?"

"Exactly," he answered with a nod. "Or… Or even go on the road with me! It gets rather lonely."

"Yeah, urm… I know," answered Fuji, looking away from him and to the surrounding kitchen. "My job takes me on the road a lot, too."

"I'll retire, then."

"What!" Fuji yelped and rose from her seat. "No, you can't! You've got tons of people depending on you! My little niece… She loves you! Oh, no, Dako!"

"Dako?"

"I'm an aunt," Fuji shrugged. "I…. Mamoru, I can't really have kids, so… I kinda just look after them for my brother."

"You sound sad about that…"

"Well, it's just that…" Fuji seated herself once against and rested her head on the palm of her left hand. "Everyone's having kids or getting married, now…. I feel like the homely sister from the _Brady Bunch_."

"Wasn't her name Kate or something?"

"Kate?" Fuji blinked. "There wasn't even a Kate! Maybe it's the _Pattie Duke Show_ you're thinking of…"

"We're getting off the subject here, and I have the sinking feeling you're doing it on purpose, Fuji… Don't you think you deserve the same thing? I mean, you sound like you care about them…"

"Of course I do! They're like my family!"

"And family would want one another to be happy, wouldn't they?"

"Well, I…"

"If you want to be a mother, I'll find a way to make it possible."

"What! You're… You're a musician!"

"Who comes from a family which delved deeply into science," answered Mamoru, placing a hand on top of hers. "I'd be more worried about what kind of a parent I'd be…. I never really saw my father a lot, growing up. He was quite…. Distant."

"Well, maybe it's too soon to be thinking about that, but… I really like the idea of maybe spending some more time with you. No one's made me feel this wanted in months, maybe even years, heh. Hey, I've got an idea! Come with me to pick up my niece and nephews, you'd love them! Like I said, Dako's a huge fan, and Jared… He's hyper… But he's so sweet! And Avery's so cute, and he's going to start walking soon!"

"You're going to annoy me with facts about them if I don't, aren't you?"

Fuji brought her nose to his and smiled, "You bet!"

"Well, we'll have to go, then," Mamoru kissed her, and then stood from his seat. "We'll eat when we get back… I, um, will probably be eating this for the entire weekend… How much did you cook here!"

"Doesn't matter, I'll be here to help you eat it," Fuji answered with a smirk.

New Delhi:

"Hello, you've reached technical support, Randolph speaking," Heiji leaned back in his seat boredly and clicked a pen in one hand while the other held a wireless phone. "I'm sorry, you have to buy the software warranty for that sort of issue, let me to connect you."

He was suddenly knocked from his seat by a blunt force to the back of the head, and watched as Veronica looked downward at him irately, clutching onto a rolled up manual.

"What's that for?" Heiji choked, and rubbed his sore skull.

"What's this I hear about you not wanting to rescue your friend!" Veronica demanded, drawing the attention of the other people in the numerous cubicles surrounding him. He noticed then Veronica was still dressed in her doctor's scrubs, and drew his head back in shock at the fact that she had not even removed her latex gloves.

"Wha—What? How'd you find out?"

"I schedule Jigen's appointments, and Jigen tells me," answered Veronica. "How do you think I remember your birthday? Now what is going on, between you and Fuji? Let me know, or I'll beat you like a naughty puppy!"

"Could we at least take it outside?" Heiji sighed, and rose from the ground. Veronica gave a rough nod, and both walked out to the lunch area, a large cement patio with white plastic chairs and tables that overlooked a large blue pool of water.

"Now, explain, because I am listening," Veronica sat back in one of the chairs, the paper still in her hand.

"….I tried to call her… She never answered. So, apparently that means that I'm not forgiven, and I should just lay off of her!"

"No one can get a hold of her, even I tried."

"What?"

"No one has heard from Fuji… Last she was seen, she was with someone who's also suspected of nearly killing Leo and Max and their children."

"Oh… Oh my God…"

"Heiji, we need to go try to find her, we can. This guy, they say, uses science to pull off all sorts of weird tricks. I don't know a better science nerd."

"…Veronica, I…."

"I know," she leaned forward and kissed him atop the head. "No matter what you choose, I'll love you…. But if you think that you still have some feelings for her, you follow those, and don't worry about me. Worse comes to worse, my folks could always stick me with a rich guy!"

"Are… Are you sure?"

"Positive," Veronica leaned inward and embraced him. "Your flight leaves in an hour… Here, take this…"

"My Heiji be good stick?" Heiji asked with a raised eyebrow as he took it from Veronica and unfolded it, allowing a ticket to Paris to fall out. "Woah…"

"It gets better… You've got a taxi with your luggage waiting out front."

"You're really amazing, Puja."

"Call me by my real name again and I won't lay off of your beating."

"But… This is a one-way ticket."

"I know," Veronica nodded. "I know that like I know you, Heiji."

"I'll see you soon!" Heiji called as he stood and walked about the building to the entrance.

"Don't say things you don't mean!" Veronica called.

Japan:

"I've never seen her cry," said the head of the orphanage to Jordan as she watched Odori amongst the children.

"Eh, this is only my second time…"

"And I thought this was some kind of heartless publicity stunt… Are you her boyfriend?"

"Publicist," Jordan answered quietly, and placed a hand on Odori's shoulder. "We've got to go."

"Mm," Odori rose and allowed a small child that had placed its arms about her neck to climb back onto the floor, and wiped her eyes as she walked out of the orphanage, Jordan by her side with Namiko in her arms.

"I think that's the first time I've seen you cry and it hasn't been my fault," Jordan admitted with a small laugh. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"I could've ended up there, or worse," Odori answered, wiping her eyes. "I'm sorry, you should not have to see this."

"Listen, I've seen worse, trust me… Those kids'll be fine, Dori… Come on, why don't we get going to our next little adventure?"

"Which would be…?"

"A concert with this guy named Mamoru Pikal… Don't worry, Young-Lee said all you have to do is lip sync… This shouldn't be too difficult."

Paris:

"And Odori's missing, too?" Heiji gaped at this information, and Yukiko gave a nod. "I can't believe I let this happen!"

"Heiji, it wasn't anyone's fault…" Ryo began with a sigh. "I just… I didn't want to play Fuji's babysitter anymore, so I thought it'd be okay to, you know, let her spread her wings a bit."

"You, too?" Ally sighed and sat back in his chair and sighed.

"Yeah, yeah, we all get an 'F' in friendship… Now we've gotta figure out how the hell to go about this," Toshiro sighed, and watched as Leo walked in, begrudgingly followed by Max.

"What in the hell are you doing here?" Ryo demanded, rising to meet Leo's eyes.

"We know you're missing Fuji…" Leo sighed. "And we think she's with the same guy who's been trying to kill me."

"Mamoru Pycal… Changed his name to Pikal years back," Max added, removing a photo from his pocket and passing it to Ryo. "Leo saw them together a few nights ago."

"Fuji, what in the hell have you done now?" a terrified Ryo asked in a whisper, seating herself once again in the large armchair she had been lying in while attempting to call Fuji.

"We know where Mamoru's going to be playing, and where he is, more than likely Fuji will be," Max announced, choosing not to seat himself with the Lupin gang. "But the show's sold out, so there's no way of getting in."

"Unless you're with us," added Leo. "We're willing to make a briefly truce with you guys to find Fuji."

"And then you'll help us find Odori," Heiji added quickly.

"Don't push it—" Max began, only to have Leo place a hand upon his shoulder.

"Fine," Leo nodded tiredly. "But Odori can handle herself, for the most part… Fuji's in real danger."

"You want a truce?" Ally looked from above his bangs to his former best friend, "Well… You got it. Just let us know what you need done."


	41. Strange Magic

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Lupin, but, you know what? You see that cookie over there? All mine. You better believe it.

Hey there, hi there, ho there! (where? Over there! Ha ha, made you look!)

In a more jovial mood now, all things considering! And therefore, more in the mood to write than I have been in months. Now on vacation, and I'd really like to thank everyone for putting up with sporadic updates and my ever-constant excuses and apologies. Hopefully things'll be going smoother now (knock on wood). Enjoy this chapter, and thanks soooo much for the response! I've been actually getting a lot of ideas from it, and who knows what I have in store, bwahaha….

P.S.: Okay, there may be one exception as to why I haven't updated. I live in an are heavily plagued with hurricanes, so if you don't hear much from me, without warning, then, yeah… Let's not think about that, though, 'kay? Enjoy!

P.P.S: This is out later than I thought because a day after I wrote the above forward the shiitake literally hit the fan and there were a few…. Shakespearean-grade dramas. Anyway, enjoy!

Fun Fact of Boredom: When writing for Victor Lupin, one of the main references I used was Pycal, the Magician… And while writing for Mamoru, I used some of Victor's better qualities (And **yes**, there are a few, although he's by far my most hated character).

Chapter Forty-one: Strange Magic

"He's going to kill you," Ryo said with a small smirk as she passed Leo a set of night-vision goggles and placed her own over her eyes.

"Not if he thinks someone else did it," Leo answered with a mutter, and began to cut the glass.

"Couldn't you have just as easily asked to protect the sheet music, or at least ask to switch it out with a fake?"

"I can't take the chance of someone knowing… I trust you to keep a secret, though, Ryoko."

"Well, I'm good with secrets, for the most part," Ryo admitted. "And you're just as bad… You had me fooled into thinking you were straight for years."

"Do we really have to go into this now?" Leo gave an annoyed sigh as he slipped the goggles on and surveyed the area of where the sheet music lie, towards a door of the museum. The window allowing light in was small, but was just enough for both he and then Ryo to climb through.

"Well, it's not like we see a whole lot of one another any other time," Ryo answered with a shrug. "And, well, it's something I've always been curious about."

"When I was with you…. When we were… Together… I wasn't thinking about Keneau Reeves or anything. It wasn't so much I was in love with a woman, and was in love with you."

"And then years later you fell out of love with me."

"I never said that," Leo completed cutting about the glass, slipped this piece out, and slid through, attached to a rope to help balance along the slick stone walls of the museum. Ryo, during this, remained in a stunned, silent state, until Leo gave a quiet, sharp whistle, and she followed him in, gripping onto him about the waist tightly as they were lowered down.

"So… You mean you still…"

"Ryoko, if we make it out of this alive, I'll buy you dinner, and we'll draw some conclusions then. But, until then… Ah, there it is," Leo smiled and turned on his flashlight, looking over the sheet music. "Beautiful."

"Glad you still think so," Ryo muttered. Leo looked to her a moment, and then both became aware of a burning smell. The two looked upward and saw a darkened figure staring back downward at them, standing on what appeared to be nothing else but air. And there was also the manner of the quickly burning rope.

"Damn, put it out!" Ryo yelped.

"How in the hell am I supposed to—WOAH!" as the rope snapped, Leo fell crashing down into the lap of a Grecian statue, while Ryo landed roughly upon him.

"Ari! Are you okay?" Ryo gasped, looking upward to him with worry after overcoming the shock.

"I landed…. On the car keys…" Leo answered hoarsely, and both shot their heads upward at the sound of sudden deep laughter.

"What happened to people using the back seats of their car for such nonsense?" he asked with a smile as he began to scale down an invisible stairway, his arms folded behind his back.

"Who in the hell are you!" Ryo shouted angrily.

"Just… Someone with a score to settle…" he remained in the shadows as he walked closer to them, now on the marble floor. Leo quickly drew his gun, and the man only smiled and chuckled at this gesture.

"You honestly think that will stop me?" he drew out his hand, and as he pulled forward, Leo's gun went flying, and landed in his hand. "If you two have anything else to say, I'll ask you to make it quick, while I'm in a charitable mood."

"I… I do have some things I want to say," Leo sat up on the statue, Ryo still in his lap. He took Ryo by the shoulders, and looked downward at her. He pressed his face to hers, much to the shock of Ryo, and as he pulled away, she gave a knowing nod, and looked over her shoulder.

"Are you both ready… To meet your end?"

"Eh, I would, but I've got a hair appointment Tuesday," Ryo answered, and with that, she went sailing back, rolling onto the floor shooting while Leo quickly removed his Walther and also began to fire. The figure gave what started as a small chuckle, then escalated into a full-scale cackle as the bullets zoomed though him.

"Damn it, he's a hologram!" Ryo shouted, and rose from the ground. The alarms then sounded, and Leo slid off of the statue and grabbed onto Ryo. "Wait, the music!"

"Aiee…" Leo groaned and ran to the case, quickly busted this with his gun and shoved it in his jacket. "So much for taking the quiet approach!"

"HALT!" the night guards shouted, and bullets began to fly in the air, directed at the two. Leo took off running, followed by Ryo, and the two quickly escaped into the basement of the museum.

"Jesus, too close…" Ryo panted, and looked over as she heard bizarre noises begin to resonate from her right. She looked over to Leo, who had pulled down his tie and was now gasping for air. "Oh, damn it, why now! Leo, calm down!"

"I…. I can't…. We're trapped… Ryoko, I don't want to go back to jail," Leo puffed in between sharp breaths.

"…We won't," Ryo looked upward to a crate that was lying with its top unopened, and smiled. "Just… Calm down…"

"The dust is killing me," Leo muttered, and Ryo felt around until she found a bag, opened it, tossed its contents aside and then handed it to Leo.

"Breathe… Come on, breathe…" Ryo ordered, her eyes widening as she read over to label upon the bag. Leo looked down to it, and gave a yelp as he tossed aside the back labeled, "Exhibit 2A: Civil War Medical Instruments". Leo then went back to his heavy panting, and Ryo moaned, grabbed onto his tie and kissed him. Leo, in response to this, immediately relaxed, and Ryo stood as she wiped her mouth clean and walked over to the box.

"What's there?" Leo stood shakily and looked into the crate.

"Think we can do something with this?"

"Well, I was never really the actor out of us, but I think we can manage," Leo answered, pulling out the samurai helmet and placing it upon his head.

Outside:

"What in the hell's taking them so long?" Ally looked to his watch and then back to the museum.

"They probably just are having a tough time getting through security," Toshiro gave a shrug, and glanced over to the museum. "What's wrong with you? You're on edge…"

"Just… Got a lot on my mind right now," Ally murmured. "And why the hell I should tell you—"

"Drop the tight-ass act, I know that's all it is—An act. Now, what the hell's wrong?"

"I… How in the hell it happened, I dunno, but… I'm gonna be a dad," Ally murmured. "I mean, it's not like I'm Ari! I actually believe in protection!"

Toshiro's face broke into a smile, and he patted Ally upon the shoulder, "Congratulations, I—"

"Save it," Ally muttered. "When Fuji hears, she'll hit the roof."

"But Fuji isn't your wife."

"Yeah, I kinda figured out that much. But haven't you noticed it? We all left her, one by one. Ari went off and started his family, then you and Yuki left her, Ryo, Heiji, Dori… Me. She can't even have kids of her own and… I can't help but feel like I'm throwing it in her face!"

"Well, you know, you gave her one thing none of us did."

"My virginity?" Ally asked plainly.

Toshiro's eyebrows shot up at this leaking of information, and he cleared his throat after recovering from this blow, "Urm, no…. Hope. I mean, you got her pregnant, didn't you?"

"It could've been me or Heiji, we'll never know for sure. But I think that's what finally sent her over the edge. Add in Jurgis' death, and… Well, crap like this starts to go down."

"Well, no one said the life of a thief was an easy one," Toshiro sighed and sat back in his seat, and both men bolted as they heard a distinct sound that could only be described as bloodcurdling screams.

Inside the museum, the once calm and collected guards now ran from what they saw as being angry demons, who clanged and clunked about loudly in heavy samurai armor as smoke filled the air.

"Who has disturbed us!" Leo shouted in Japanese, trying to hold back a laugh. Ryo watched as one guard, clearly a skeptic amongst the bunch, drew his gun and fired. She was quick to dodge this, even in her heavy armor, and jabbed toward him with a spear, missing him by inches.

The two had the guards cornered when there was the sound of screeching tires, and the Romeo crashed through the front doors of the museum, which were glass. Toshiro worked to brushed off the glass while Ally sped forward, and the samurai stood up in the car as Jigen approached the two faux ghosts and took either by the arm, and helped them into the still-moving car.

"Move over!" Ryo tossed aside her helmet and climbed into the front seat beside her brother while Leo looked over the sheets of music he had lifted and wondered how he would ever explain this to Max.

"Don't worry, I'll return these when I'm done with them!" Leo shouted back to the guards, and was nearly struck by a bullet from hostile gunfire. Toshiro quickly drew one of his swords, however, and the bullet was sliced.

"Home?" Ryo called to her teammates.

"Home!" the three men shouted in unison.

"All right," she smiled, shifted gears and spun about, now confusing the guards even moreso by driving straight toward them. They were too busy dodging Ryo's tires to continue to fire, and Jigen-Lupin escaped through the same hole Ally had made in the glass.

A different area of Paris:

"New York? You want me to go with you?" Fuji gasped as she and Mamoru drank coffee early in the morning, after he had walked in from what he referred to as, 'Last minute editing on a track'. Fuji glanced over the tickets in her hand and then looked upward to Mamoru, who only gave a nod and a smile as he placed his arm about her.

"And Japan after that, and Australia after that," he said quietly. "My band's going on tour with a pop singer, Young-Lee. She's a Korean artist who—"

"Oh, yeah, I know her!" Fuji snapped her fingers and smiled. "I haven't seen her in forever, though! Ha ha, this'll be great! You better watch out, we get along like we were sisters!"

"You have? You do? My God, you really are full of surprises," he kissed her and then broke his hold from her, and walked up the stairs to the bedroom. "We'll leave tonight, so, if you want to call anyone to let them know, I—"

"Nope. No one," Fuji answered quickly and sternly as she followed him up the stairs. "I'll call my parents on the plane. They're used to me doing it, after all of these years. What's one more badly timed phone call, right?"

"…If you're really sure about it."

"I'm positive," Fuji gave a sigh and a weak smile to him. "Sorry…. I just…. After everyone's done it to me, let's see how they like it when they're ditched."

"A little bitter, are we?" Mamoru laughed and placed his hands upon her shoulders and smiled. "I'm sure they're good people, but they're just that—People. Don't invest too much faith in a single person, or a group of people. It almost always lead to disappointment, Fuji."

"Hrm?" Fuji looked him over, and chuckled. "Then what about you, huh? Should I not trust you, but go with you to New York, and then Japan, and then Australia after that?"

Mamoru blinked with surprise a moment, and then gave a chuckle, "Well, I said almost no one."

"And why do you think I could invest my trust in you, hrm?"

"Because I love you," Mamoru answered much to a stunned Fuji's surprise, and he added worriedly. "Did I say something wrong?"

"No… I… It's just different, is all," Fuji chuckled. "I guess I…. I guess I love you, too."

Paris:

"Ow…" Leo shuddered as Max applied alcohol to the blood upon the side of his face, where a bullet had struck him. "Ow!"

"Jeeze, don't be such a baby about it," Max sighed and placed the lid upon the bottle, and sat back on the floor. "All done. Makes me wonder where the good old Leo went when I see you cringing over a little cut."

"The good old Leo? What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well, from what Ally's been telling me you used to kick ass and then take names," Max shrugged and stood. "Even when we were kids I have a couple of memories of you beating up some other guys."

"Eh, probably false memories… Y'know, like how you think things you see on TV are--"

"Leo," Max rolled his eyes and sighed, seating himself beside Leo on the edge of the bed in their hotel room. "I saw a glimpse of him when you killed that guy who was after Dako…"

"The guy who looked like Snape?"

"Erm, yeah… Well, you may have to bring out a little of that again just to survive this guy, if Lupin's right about how powerful he is."

"I'm not crazy at the thought of becoming some blood-thirsty maniac, Max."

"I'm not asking you to!" Max sighed and brushed his hair back. "Just don't…. Don't hesitate if it comes down to killing this guy; it'd be the best for all of us if you did."

"….You're afraid I'm gonna show mercy on him, aren't you?"

"Well, I, um… Listen, just don't hesitate to put that bastard in the dirt. I know if I see him, I won't."

Leo was about to comment upon this, but there are a knock on the door, and Leo sighed and rose, opening the door to the hotel room to see Ryo standing in front of him, "Do you have any idea what time it is?"

"I know it's late, but we made it out of there alive."

"What? Oh… What, now?"

"What's up?" Max craned his head and saw Ryo in the doorway, then looked to Leo with slight questioning.

"I wanted to go over some plans with him… Is it okay if I borrow him for an hour, Max?" Ryo asked, clasping her hands together hopefully. "Think of it as payback."

"Payback? For what?"

"Well, that kiss," Ryo winked and chuckled, and a flustered Max paused a moment, then waved the two off.

"I'm heading to bed. Touch him and you'll never get out of the Taiwanese prison I leave you in," Max murmured.

"I'll make sure he behaves," Ryo answered, pulling Leo by the hand and then shutting the door behind them.

"What in the hell is this about?" a flustered Leo asked, walking beside Ryo down the hallway.

"Well, I…. It's not often I even see you anymore. C'mon, I know a nice diner around here, it'll be a good trip before our flight to New York tomorrow."

"You realize that I'm a marked man, right?"

"Mm-hm. Right here," Ryo placed a finger upon Leo's chest, and flicked his nose after he looked down to his tie. Leo gave a grumble and rubbed his sore nose while Ryo only gave a chuckle. "Looks like you haven't changed at all."

"You're kinda immature for a married woman."

"I could say the same about you," Ryo smirked. "You're the guy who does cartoon voiceovers."

"Because I needed a job!" Leo answered with a huff, and followed her out of the hotel and down the street to a nearby Italian diner, which was open in the dead hours of the Parisian night. "So, what's this all about anyway, Ryoko? I mean, really?"

"I just wanted to have the chance to talk to you… All those years ago you left, and we've never just sat down. Do you even realize how long we've been broken up?" Ryo asked as she seated herself at one of the small wooden tables inside the diner across from Leo.

"Well… I left, then a year passed, and I—"

"Eight years."

"What! It can't be that long, I mean, I—"

"How old's your son?"

"Which one?" Leo chuckled lightly, and then gave this some genuine thought. "Crap, you're right! I got Arlene pregnant, and…"

"Then proceeded to get Cecilia pregnant, and I'm sure one of these days you'll get Max pregnant. You can sneeze near a woman, and she gets pregnant from you," Ryo glanced to her menu, then sighed quietly. "Any of them but me."

"Is this about that again?" Leo moaned. "It's a kind of painful thing for both of us, should you really be dredging it up?"

"I was on birth control."

"What?" Leo blinked and ordered a glass of juice while Ryo opted for tea from the waitress. "Um… Good to know… That usually controls your chance of giving birth."

"I know," Ryo gave a sad smile and glanced to the candle that sat in the middle of the table. "I was just afraid of being a mom at that young an age. I still liked boozing it up, dancing and partying, and you were so excited about a family, so…"

"You never told me," Leo nodded. "Well, I always did kind of wonder…. But, why are you telling me this now?"

"Guilt," Ryo smiled and shrugged. "Fuji had her own miscarriage around that same time, but she was so brave about it. I think the only person who wanted a family more than you was her. Where in the hell that gene came from, I'll never know… I think there's a good chance of her being with this guy because there's a chance that she might finally get what she wants. She's extremely jealous of you, you know."

"Mm…. Bills, having to learn sign language to communicate with my son, wondering if giving him hearing aids is even a good thing to do, stroking Max's ego, making sure Jared's not climbing on anything or Dako's not in a fight… Yeah, that's something to be jealous of."

"But she still loves the idea of it… Proving that she's indeed crazy," their drinks arrived, and Ryo ordered a plate of lasagna while Leo ordered a salad.

"Watching your figure?" Ryo chuckled after Leo had placed his order.

"Yeah, well, I'm gaining weight off of Max's cooking."

"I thought you looked a little fatter," Ryo said plainly, causing Leo to choke upon his juice. "Relax, it's not a bad thing, you look better a little more filled out."

"I just don't wanna turn into freakin' Dom DeLuise," Leo murmured.

"I was wondering…."

"No, he wasn't in _The Producers_. That was a different fat guy," Leo answered, finishing his drink and setting down the glass. "Trust me, I know that movie well enough…"

"Do you still love me? You kind of hinted at it."

"Ryoko… Don't make me answer that… You know how hard it is."

"Ari, please, if you do nothing else for me…"

"Fine. Yes," Leo answered with a sigh. "Just… I love Max, too. And I love my family, and I love my kids, and I love the bikes on the front lawn, or Max's tantrums, or when he gives me a haircut, or when Jared's painting the walls of the house. I love you, but there's a lot more to love than just saying it. Have I given you what you wanted now? Happy?"

Ryo gave a smile and looked at her drink, "No, actually. Not at all. I feel the same… Still a little hungry, and kind of tired."

"Me, too," Leo muttered, and leaned back in his chair. "Well, at least we got that all out of the way, eh?"

"Hey, Leo… I know I'm taken, but I've still got an opening for a gay shopping buddy. You interested?"

"Me? Shopping? You'd have better luck with Max… I swear to God the biggest mistake I ever made was putting him on my account."

Ryo chuckled and shook her head at this, "Well, you are really cheap. But, would you be interested in being my friend?"

"Obligatory gay friend, neh? Well, I've never been anyone's stereotype, but there's a first for everything," Leo looked upward to her, and then spoke in a lispy, effeminate tone. "You know, if we're gonna be seen in public together, you've simply _got _to do something about that _Speedracer_ outfit, sweetie."

Ryo laughed loudly and placed a hand over her mouth, "Oh my God! You do that so well!"

"Practice… Max drags me to the Castro whenever he can," Leo shrugged and scratched the back of his head. "So you given any thought to having kids now?"

"With Victor? Mm… Not sure."

"Why not? Does he have trouble…?"

"Victor! Oh! Oh, hell no, that's not an issue," Ryo said with a wave of the hand. "It's just that—Well, hypothetically speaking, if he--"

"Urm, you could always look up some stuff online," Leo shrugged. "Or ask my dad."

The two were quickly interrupted as the restaurant suddenly began to shake lightly, and then more violently after a few moments. The glasses were the first to burst, followed by the lines of wine bottles, and then the light bulbs hanging over the tables. Ryo gave a yelp, and Leo quickly took her by the wrist and ducked beneath the table with her.

"What in the hell's going on!" Ryo shouted over the pandemonium. "An earthquake!"

"Doubtful," Leo muttered and removed his gun, just as Max had advised him, pulling upon it with his teeth and locking a bullet in place.

In the hotel, there was a similar situation. Heiji had been sitting in the same room as Ally when the roaring movement began, and Ally went rolling off of the couch. He quickly crawled beneath this furniture as the lamp burst in their room, leaving them in darkness.

"This isn't right at all!" Heiji shouted as he moved beneath the coffee table, taking his laptop along with him.

"Well, no crap!" Ally said with a growl. A pair of ice skates that had been laying upon the dresser fell, and after a few more moments, these began to move, before levitating off of the ground and digging themselves into a wall.

"Aw, NO! No, no, NO!" Heiji moaned as the computer screen flickered and died. He then looked over to Ally, who was clenching his head tightly. "Ally! What's wrong!"

"Turn off that damn noise!" Ally growled in pain. Heiji stared at the scene about him helplessly, and then, all at once… It stopped. All of the metal that had been flying about the room dropped, and Ally collapsed with exhaustion. Heiji scrambled to his feet, and ran for Toshiro and Yukiko.

"He's got a metal plate in his head," Yukiko explained a short time later, exiting the bedroom and drying her hands from the towel she had placed over Ally's forehead. "And metal wiring from having his jar broken."

"He's like the freakin' tin man," Toshiro exclaimed quietly, and Yukiko only gave a tired glare before turning back to face Heiji.

"Well, is he gonna be all right?" asked Heiji, looking over his shoulder to Ally. Max was in the room beside them, speaking hurried English into his cell phone and then finally falling into silence.

"Ryo's not picking up, and Uncle Jigen never called them," Max explained, walking out of the bedroom into the hall with the other three. "I have no idea where he is!"

"Maybe they're…" Toshiro trailed off and looked upward toward the ceiling tile as Max's expression darkened.

"Leo's a lot of things, but he'd never cheat on me," Max hissed to Toshiro through gritted teeth. "No way, no after everything. He's not like some other people."

"What the hell's that mean?" asked Yukiko, looking above her fedora.

"You're just scoring big with everyone tonight, aren't you, Big Red?" Heiji said with a tired, smug look upon his features.

Toshiro looked to Heiji with a glare, and took a step toward his brother, "You know what, Heiji? You can—"

"Ryoko!" Yukiko shouted and ran to the exhausted figure in the hall. Ryo's clothing was torn, and there was blood seeping from a small wound upon her forehead. She slowly crept down the hall, leaning against a wall for support, and then collapsed. She was on the floor for less than a second before Yukiko caught her and pulled her up, dirtying her own white suit in the process.

"They took him…" Ryo murmured before her head bobbed and she passed out in her sister's arms.

"Take him! Where'd they take him!" Max yelped, jumping toward Ryo, his eyes wide with panic.

"Hey, lay off her, will ya!" Toshiro snapped. "She's fainted! She's gotta get some medical attention!"

"Get the hell off of me!" Max shouted, and pulled off Toshiro's hand, and went to smack the samurai with his other hand, but this blow was taken by the sheath of Toshiro's smaller sword, Izanami.

"Try to hit me again and you'll earn yourself a one-way ticket to hell," Toshiro said warningly.

"Could someone get her! She's heavy!" Yukiko shouted, and Max quickly turned from Toshiro, and helped Yukiko to carry her sister into the bedroom.

"Lay her on the couch," Yukiko ordered, and Max did so, with the help of Toshiro.

Ally opened one eye, and both shot open with recognition as he realized the state of his older sister. "Ryoko!" he shouted, and rose, only to grip his head and fall back onto the bed.

"Wow, relax, Buddy, we've got her," Heiji said in a calming voice, taking Ally by the shoulders and easing him onto the bed.

"I'll call Victor and let him know what happened," Toshiro announced and disappeared into the bathroom with his cell phone.

"Ryo, what happened?" asked Yukiko quietly.

"There was… Like… An earthquake…" Ryo muttered, and turned her head to a side. "Yuki, I'm really sleepy…"

"What?" Yukiko's eyes widened, and she shook Ryo by the shoulders. "Ryo? Ryoko, don't go to sleep, all right! Please don't go to sleep!"

"But, I…"

"Ryoko!"

New York, the afternoon:

Odori looked about the large stage with great worry and took another step forward. Jordan sat leaned back in a seat of the large amphitheatre, his arms across his chest while Namiko sat clapping her hands happily as she watched her mother cross the stage.

"Go, Mama!" Namiko cheered, and Odori drew a nervous smile.

"You'll do great," Jordan reassured her, and rose from his seat, and hopped up onto the stage. "We'll get this done with, and we'll be on a plane for Hawaii before you know it!"

"I never want to wear heels or dye my hair again as long as I may live," Odori murmured. "I should have gotten Fuji to do this… She would have loved this."

"Have you heard from Fuji recently?"

"Urm… No. What purpose would she have to call me? I don't even have a cell phone," Odori admitted.

"Wow, this place is terrific!" both turned their attention to the sound of a squeal, and watched as Fuji walked hand-in-hand with a tired looking man by her side. "Wha….. Dori-chan!"

"Fuji!" Odori spat back in horror, and was totally unprepared as Fuji leapt onto the stage and spun the small woman about. "What in the hell are you doing here!"

"More importantly, how'd you know it was her?" Jordan asked, tilting his head to one side.

"That's easy!" Fuji said with a wide smile after finally letting a dazed Odori set her feet back upon the ground. "Dori-chan's got the bigger chest!"

"I… Uh…" Odori's face reddened, and she cleared her throat, and placed her hands across her chest uncomfortably. "You… You still haven't answered my question!"

"I'm here for a friend of mine," Fuji answered with a smile, and looked over to Mamoru, who remained in the back of the stadium, going over specifications with the lighting designer. "Hey, Mamoru! Come here, I want you to meet some people!"

"What the heck?" Jordan muttered as he heard his cell phone go off, and blinked. "I've got reception?"

"Jeeze, what, is that phone like five years old or something!" Fuji asked with a laugh.

"Hey, if it ain't broke, don't fix it," Jordan muttered. "….Forty-seven missed calls… Thirty new voicemail… Text inbox at full capacity… Urm, I've gotta take these calls… This might be a while." He then hopped off of the stage, lifted Namiko in his arms, and then made his way out of the stadium. As Namiko passed Mamoru in the front entrance, she curled against her foster-father protectively, burying her face in his chest and clutching onto her doll. Both Mamoru and Jordan gave puzzled looks at this gesture, and Jordan held the young girl tighter than before as a result.

"This big place scaring you, huh, Nami?" Jordan said with a knowing smile as he bunched in what he thought was his access code to his voicemail.

"Invalid selection… Please try again," the phone answered in its monotone voice.

"What? But…. It's my birthday…" Jordan muttered, and stared at the phone for a moment, "….My birthday is the eleventh, right? ….It's gotta be sometime in July… Maybe the twelfth? Aie… Why couldn't I have just been born on the fourth!" Jordan turned about to head back to Odori, but Namiko only shook her head and clutched onto Jordan tightly. "Fine, we'll stay here," he sighed as he lost the last of his resolve and seated himself on the steps of the front entrance, and continued to type in numbers.

"So…?" Fuji clasped her hands together and smiled. "Do you remember what yesterday was, hrmmm?"

"I believe _Lost_ was on, but it was a rerun," answered Odori with a raised eyebrow.

"You watch it for the Korean guy, don't you?" asked Fuji with a chuckle.

"No—The American with the accent," Odori answered quickly, and then continued. "It was your birthday, wasn't it?"

"Yup! And something else, too!" Fuji smiled and held up her hand, revealing a ring.

"**What**!" Odori nearly fell out of her heels, and looked over Fuji in wide-eyed shock, '_She's engaged **before **me! What sort of hell am I in!'_

"Hehe… I've met this great guy," Fuji answered with a confident air. "I know, I know… It'll be sad seeing me go off of the market, but I turned twenty-eight yesterday!"

"You must have turned stupid, as well! How long have you known this man!"

"About a week… But that doesn't matter. You're just jealous because all you and Jordan do just about is hold hands," Fuji said with a smirk.

"How did—Nevermind! I am not jealous of you, I'm simply wondering where you left your brain! I'm thinking it's still in baggage!"

"Dori… Hehehe… You're jealous," Fuji shrugged and folded her arms. "And why would I be taking insults from someone who looks like Rainbow Brite, anyway?"

"You'll pay for—" Odori felt about for her sword, but remembered it was still behind stage. "If I had Zantetsuken with me, you wouldn't have to worry about getting your hair cut again, because you wouldn't have a head!"

"Yikes… I come to share good news with you and you're just blowing up at me!"

"Because you're acting like an imbecile!"

"Maybe," Fuji leaned inward. "But I'm happier than I've been in months, Dori, and he's been there for me more in this entire week than you all have been this year."

"….You've made your own grave," said Odori somberly as she turned away from Fuji and directed her attention to the microphone at the head of the stage. Fuji only shrugged this off, and walked back down the stairs to Mamoru.

"Everything all right?"

"Yeah, it's all perfect," Fuji muttered.

"I forgot something back at the hotel room, would you mind hanging around here a little longer?" Mamoru took her by the shoulders and faced her with a smile upon his face.

"I, urm…"

"I won't be long," Mamoru added, and kissed her before breaking his embrace with her. "I'll be right back, I promise!"

"Yeah…" Fuji nodded and waved numbly and watched as he hopped down the stairs and to one of the limousines parked out front. "Don't be too long…."

"Fuji!" Jordan shouted in a panic and ran back to the front of the stadium. "Where'd that guy go?"

"Our hotel room," Fuji answered plainly, folding her arm.

"Wait…. You and him…?"

"What, I can't have a serious relationship?"

"Fuji, you've gotta listen to me, he's bad news."

"Oh, God! You, too! Jordan, I think you should be one of the last people giving me relationship advice," Fuji leaned against on of the backs on one of the plastic chairs, and Jordan's expression immediately changed to one of insult.

"What's that mean?"

"You're good at math!"

"Ugh. Listen, anyway, Leo's missing—"

"What!"

"And it gets worse… Ryo's in the hospital," Jordan said with a gulp as Namiko struggled to find a comfortable position in the arms of her step-father.

"H-how bad?"

"Fifty-fifty," Jordan answered, and looked Fuji squarely in the eye. "They think this guy you're seeing's got something to do with it, Fuji."

"Mamoru? Hehe… No way," Fuji shook her head and chuckled. "Not him. No way would he—"

"What makes you so sure!" Jordan shouted, and now the duo was drawing the attention of the people bustling about, preparing for the concert. Namiko cringed, and Jordan sighed and stroked the little girl's hair. "Listen…. How much do you know about him really, Fuji?"

"I know that he's a good person, he's treated me the best I think I've ever been treating, and that there's something really special about him."

"Yeah, specially psychotic!"

SMACK! Fuji heaved her breaths and her fists remained clenched as a stunned Jordan recovered from the blow delivered across his face. Namiko gave a whimper and began to weep quietly, and Fuji's expression softened, and she looked to the little girl with regret.

"Nami, I…"

"No," Namiko scooted away as Fuji reached out to her, and Lupin pulled back, and stormed away from both, headed toward one of the inner recesses of the stadium.

A storage shed, out in a more rural area of town:

"I'm really sorry about this," Mamoru sighed and shrugged after Leo had come to. "I mean… I hear you're a really great guy, but we've all got our obligations. And after this, I'll be free of mine."

"What… What in the hell are you….?"

"Hey, don't talk, I need you alive a little bit longer," said Mamoru reassuringly. "I heard about your friend, and… I'm really sorry about it all. I didn't mean for her to get hurt. I already made sure some of the best doctors in the area are looking after Ryoko."

"We… We don't want anything from you!" Leo hissed.

Mamoru gave a sigh, and stood upright, "I guess you've never been one to listen… Well, from what I heard. Which isn't much, actually. I just know you're a Lupin."

"So you're killing me on those grounds alone?" Leo asked, blinking a few times.

"Well… Not those alone. See, your dad destroyed mine, so I promised him on his deathbed I'd take you out…. Now, you're probably thinking 'why you', right? Well, he told me that it'd be one thing to kill Lupin, but another to kill the son who bears his name. You get where I'm going? Wow, I guess you must wish you were named something else at times, huh?"

"Tried it."

"Yeah… That didn't work out for you…." Mamoru rose and placed his hands in his pockets. "I'll make your death quick because I really respect you, Arsène. I like to think we could've been friends in another life."

"If you're going to refer to me by my birthname, at least call me 'Ari'."

"Heh, all right, I'll bite," Mamoru shrugged as he slowly paced about the room. "So, is there anyone I should send condolences to?"

"Like I'm really going to tell you that," Leo said with a smirk.

"You don't have to," Mamoru revealed from one of his pockets Leo's warn wallet, and began to sift through it. "Jeeze, carry cash, much?" he muttered as he pulled out a large number of euros and American dollars. "Let's see…. Who's this guy, your friend?"

Leo answered plainly, "He's my husband."

Mamoru's eyebrows shot up, and he blinked, looking over the photo once more, and then to Leo, "It's okay, I work in the music business—I'm used to your kind. Who're these three? ….These boys, they look like you. Your children?" Leo only remained silent, and Mamoru glanced upward to him, "I promise I won't bring any harm to them… I love kids. I'm actually thinking of trying with this girl I just met a little while ago. She… She's really something special."

"She must be, if she sees something in you," Leo snapped, and this was greeted by a blow on the back of the head.

"I… Sorry," Mamoru gave an apologetic shrug as Leo cringed from this blow. "I guess I don't know my own strength. I'd offer you some Tylenol, but I don't see the point. You're going to be dead by tomorrow morning."

"Why don't you just kill me know, and get it over with?"

"You know, I would, but… I've heard it's better to mess around with a hostage, first. Men have been known to go mad in your situation, Mr. Lupin."

"Been there, done that," Leo said with a smirk. "And I'll recommend you to a nice asylum once I get out. The one I was at had some terrific food. Tuesday's pizza night!"

"Wonderful…" Mamoru answered plainly, and unlocked the door to the otherwise seamless prison. "I'll see you in the morning, Mr. Lupin… You can bide your time until then, I'm sure. And, if you get out of your restraints, I promise that you still won't be able to escape here. So, I'll give you something to keep yourself busy, if you get a little frustrated." With this said, Mamoru revealed a gun, and set it upon the ground at Leo's feet, "You might as well; why die at the hands of a stranger, when you could go out like a warrior?"

Leo said nothing in response to this, but watched as the heavy door closed behind Mamoru, and then stared downward at the gun.

Later that night:

Mamoru stood overlooking the crowd, and could not hide his apparent nervousness behind his usually calm expression as he peered out from behind the stage. Fuji smiled at him knowingly and placed a hand upon his arm, "I know you'll do great… And tomorrow we'll be outta here, and a month from now I'll never have to hear the name 'Lupin' again, as long as I live."

"Lupin?" Mamoru frowned, and blinked several times; what did that mean, exactly?

"Well, yeah… I, urm…" Fuji smiled sheepishly, and bit her lower lip, "I haven't been that truthful, but… I thought if I told you that you'd just think I wanted something from you. But all I want is for us to be happy, now."

"You're… You…."

"I'm Lupin the Fourth," Fuji answered. "And I'm hoping you don't hold it against me."

Mamoru's mouth hung open in stunned silence, and when he went to speak, he heard his name called, "Fuji, why…"

"Good luck," Fuji kissed him and then took a step back. "Lemme know when you get out of there, all right? I've got some pretty good news for you."

Mamoru heard his name called once again, and turned away from her, his mind reeling over what to do.


	42. Ring of Fire

DISCLAIMER: I so don't own it…

Howdy!

And hello! Here once again, another chapter, another week, and one important decision… Look soon for a third part (yeah, you heard me right) to this series, which you can feel free to read and suggest to your friends (i.e., force through blackmail, in necessary). This'll mean even more changes, hey, perhaps a change in title is just what this series needs! Yeah, that's what I'm feeling… I'm thinking that personally it'll help with my motivation, plus this was getting 'up-there' in the way of chapters, anyway. Oh, and look for a mini-story coming up soon, as well. It'll be out of my usual cannon… Yeesh, it's like those things are becoming a yearly thing for me… That's all for now, and happy summer to all!

Fun Fact of Boredom: Starting the third installment of this group's adventures falls just short of my third anniversary of being a write on which occurs next month (woo, let's hope that three's my lucky number!)

Chapter Forty-two: Ring of Fire

Mamoru headed toward the stage, manning his keyboard, and then watched as Odori ran out, and the crowd went mad. It was the opening performance, and the two would be singing a duet while he played upon the keyboard and the rest of his band added their instruments into the mix. Odori waited nervously for the tape to begin, once glancing down at Jordan and Namiko, then smiling back at the crowd, shouting greetings in Japanese, Korean, and then finally very shaky English. The crowd loved this, and the song started up.

It was around that time that the rest of the Lupin gang minus Ryo showed up. Ally had taken over driving responsibilities (he had left Carmen to watch after Ryo in Paris; Victor was nowhere to be found), and was stunned as a black Cobra pulled up, Victor hopping out after only moments of being parked.

"Where is that jerk?" Victor hissed, drawing his pistol. "If he's not dead already, he's soon to _be _dead!"

"Woah, cool it, Baretta," Yukiko held up her own weapon and frowned. "They're inside, but don't go shooting the damn place up."

"Give me three goods reasons!" Victor demanded.

"Odori's on stage," Yukiko answered, and Victor lowered his weapon, blinking and wondering if he had indeed heard her correctly. "She's… Singing… Listen, it's a long story, and Leo's missing, too."

"I could care less about that little fairy, I just want to kill the bastard who's got my wife in ICU!" Victor growled.

"…Listen, you can fight with us, but only if you agree to calm it down some," Heiji sighed. "Now, we've gotta have a game plan… So far, we know he can create fire, walk on air, bend metal and disappear into thin air."

"Oh, is that all?" Victor muttered, and tilted his head to a side.

"First step's getting into that stadium," Heiji added, pointing over his shoulder to the packed crowd.

"I'll take care of that," said Ally. "With, urm… Snively Whiplash's help, over here… If it were anyone besides Ryo, I'd run you over right now, Victor."

"Thanks, Al," Yukiko tilted down her fedora and smirked. "Well, Toshiro and I'll get to work, too. Heiji, you know what to do?"

"You bet," Heiji nodded and proceeded to climb the fence around the stadium, followed by Victor and Ally and then Yukiko and Toshiro.

"So, when we get out of here…" Toshiro began quietly.

"..Then we'll talk," Yukiko responded, and glanced to him, "But not until then… I especially don't wanna be talking about it, here."

"Yuki, I'm in my mid-thirties now… I don't want to be forty with a son," Toshiro said as they walked around to the back of the stadium, and looked to one of the doorways.

"You act like it's a responsibility of yours."

"Well, the name's lasted long enough, I'd kind of hoped to keep it going."

"We've got Saiyuri, all right? Let's just let her grow up a little more… Plus I'm really not in the mood for a conversation like this right now."

"Because you're afraid to?"

"Because I've got to make this shot," she snapped. "Now quit being an idiot and do your part, all right? Jeeze… You're worse than a kid, sometimes!"

Toshiro gave a small grumble, and as the two approached the guarded area where the blue prints had stated the power outlet to be, and Toshiro quickly made short of the guards. He cut through the back door, and then Yukiko entered, tipping her hat to him along the way. The two then waited for their signal.

Heiji sat upon a car in the stadium typing away upon his laptop, and cleared his throat as he set up a microphone and disguised his voice with a thick American accent, "Ladies and gentlemen, we're sorry to interrupt your concert going experience, but due to technical difficulties we will have to cancel the remainder of our show tonight. Please accept our sincerest apologies, and realize that we will be prepared to give you a full refund by contacting our website."

This did not go over well at all in the crowd, and there were murmurs of unrest. There were also two officers to help the other police men lead out the crowds, one olive-skinned with a beard and another with striking blue eyes peering from beneath his lowered police hat.

"I don't see how this is getting me any closer to killing that bastard," Victor grumbled.

"Don't get your panties in a bunch, Vicky, we'll get him," said Ally confidently.

"What'd you call me!" Victor demanded, but Ally was soon gone in the crowd, and Victor looked back to the stage with a glare.

Meanwhile, Mamoru and Odori had retreated to opposite sides on the stage, Odori with Jordan on her side, embracing her and kissing her atop the forehead.

"You did great…. You should do karaoke," Jordan said with a smirk.

"Thank you… Personally, I can't wait to be rid of these damn outfits," Odori admitted and took her daughter into her arms. "I can't help but to wonder why they canceled the concert…"

"Not a clue, but the next step is to find my idiot sister, though," Jordan murmured. "She's going to kill herself, or is going to be killed."

"That man… I sense a bad aura about him…"

"Yeah, and I just think he's freakin' evil," Jordan muttered. "Come on, I think they're across the stage," he added, taking her by the hand and pulling her along.

Mamoru was in his dressing room, the rest of his band gone and only Fuji in the room with him. Fuji looked to him with true worry; he seemed distressed over something. His breath was sharp, and he was bent over on his chair with his hands covering his face.

"What's wrong? Mamoru…" Fuji bent down to face him, and Mamoru looked upward to her and embraced her tightly.

"W-why… I… I don't get it…" Mamoru muttered to himself.

"Mamoru…" Fuji pulled back and placed a hand on his face. "I… I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I hope… That this doesn't change anything. I really… I really like being around you. Hell, I love you, and I don't say that too often to too many guys… I've got a past, but I've only told two others that I loved them, and one's dead, and the other's… Well, we had a parting of ways. What's wrong? I'll do whatever I can to fix it, just tell me."

"There's nothing that can be fixed," Mamoru answered with a shrug. "I… You'd love me no matter what, right, Fuji?"

"I… Mamoru, you're scaring me," Fuji said quietly.

"I've done some terrible things that hurt you, and you probably didn't even realize it…." Mamoru whispered, choking through his sentence.

"I… Oh, God, what am I going to do?" Fuji muttered, and sat back on her haunches. "You really… Did all of those things that Jordan was telling be about…. Mamoru, where's my brother?"

"I can draw you directions," Mamoru stood and looked about frantically for a sheet of paper and a pencil. "before they get here…"

"Who?"

"Your gang, they're out for my blood," Mamoru answered while hurriedly sketching a map for her.

"I'll call them off, then!"

"They'd never forgive you," Mamoru rose as he completed the map and shoved it in her hand. "You've got a group of wonderful friends, even if you don't realize it. Fuji, you're better off with them. I… Listen, just go, I'll handle them!"

"But… I… They'll kill you!"

"I don't care," Mamoru smiled and took her by the shoulders. "If this was my last week, then I couldn't have asked for a better one. Now go, all right? I'll be fine, no matter where I am."

"Mamoru, I…" a sad smile came across Fuji's features, and she nodded. "You…. You've given me everything I've ever asked for."

Mamoru blinked as he caught the meaning of this, and kissed her deeply once before she looked to the window and climbed up on top of a chest, and then busted through the window with a drum that had been nearby.

"I knew it'd come to this," Mamoru rolled up the sleeves of his light-purple dress shirt and stanced himself as he heard voices and footsteps drawing closer and closer to the door.

Fuji, meanwhile, managed to hijack a blue Shelby Cobra she had stopped out front earlier, and that had belonged to one of the managers of the event. It had just enough speed to get her where she was going, although she wasn't as easily able to weave in and out of traffic as Ryo was.

"Ryoko… Ari… Guys, I'm so sorry," she whispered as she fishtailed to a right, and approached a large gated mansion. She placed the car in reverse, and then went crashing through the thick metal gates, all but destroying the body of the Cobra. She zoomed through the winding driveway and straight to the backyard, to a tool shed. Fuji hopped out of the car, barely even allowing it to stop, and then made a run for the shed. She glanced in and gasped as she saw her brother tied up to a chair in the center of the small room, a gun at his feet.

"Oh my God…" she murmured and stepped away, removing a small walkie-talkie from what looked like a button on her jacket, and spun the dial around, hoping to pick up the correct frequency. "C'mon, Max… Be close by…." She said as she removed the hearing piece from the button and held it up to her ear. She breathed a sigh of relief as she heard Max's familiar gruff American accent, and spoke into the walkie talkie. "Inspector Zenigata, this is Lupin the Fourth, over."

"FUJI!" Max shrieked into the walkie, "Where have you BEEN! Do you have any clue what's been going on!"

"Unfortunately, yes," Fuji choked. "I'm here with Ari, but I need you here, too… I'll give you directions, but you need to trust me on them, all right?"

"If he's hurt, it's your ass," Max said with a snarl that made Fuji know that he indeed meant it this time.

"Just… Hurry up, okay?" Fuji said quietly, and went into leading Max to the mansion. Zenigata pulled up in his police cruiser, busting through the same hole Fuji had made only minutes earlier, and jumped out of the black and white car, not bothering to turn off the flashing lights.

"It's just a shed!" Max looked over to Fuji, and Fuji had never seen him more ready to punch her in his life. She merely took a step back, and folded her arms.

"Knowing him, it's covered in glass," Fuji said quietly, and Max gave a swift kick to the shed, and moaned as this proved positive and he heard his foot crack as he tumbled to the ground.

"L-Listen, Max… Calm down, we'll get him out of there," Fuji bent down and placed a hand upon his shoulder. "We've just got to think of something…"

"You can't even begin to realize how many people worried over you," Max clutched onto his foot and shakily rose, his leg hurting but the desire to free Leo from the prison he was in overriding the pain. "What do we do?"

"We need an Ishikawa," Fuji said, and looked to the police cruiser. "Let me go, you're injured."

"No, I can make it—Ow…" Max cursed as he took a step forward and once fell to the ground again. "Then again, maybe you going's a good idea, after all…"

"I knew you'd see it my way, Zenigata," Fuji said with a smirk as she climbed into the cruiser. "Hey, one more thing!"

"What?"

"Gimme your trenchcoat," Fuji called. "It's June, anyway, you don't need the damn thing!"

"Fine, fine, take it," Max tossed this to her, and glanced back upward to the shed while Fuji sped off. "Just hurry back… C'mon, Leo, just hold on a little more…"

Back at the stadium, Yukiko and Toshiro were at a standoff in front of Mamoru's dressing room door, Yukiko with her gun drawn, and Toshiro with both of his swords. They had shut out the power long ago, and now they relied on the emergency lights for any source of light.

"Come on out, we've got you surrounded!" Yukiko shouted, cocking back her pistol. "Consider this your warning, 'cause I'm in a good mood!"

"You really think you can beat me?" a small chuckle came from behind the door. "I may not want to fight you, but that doesn't mean I won't go out without a fight… Give me your best."

"You don't have to ask," Yukiko snapped and fired a few shots, Mamoru managing to dodge one bullet as it pierced through the door but getting struck in the shoulder by one of the bullets of the magnum. He grunted as it entered his shoulder, and gripped onto the wounded area while countering with his own specialty; flames. The door was gone in a matter of moments, a victim to the fire which shot from Mamoru's fingers, and Yukiko and Toshiro quickly dodged this, either going down an opposite side of the hall.

"You know how you usually extinguish fire…." Toshiro spied a fire extinguisher beside him, threw this upward, slicing it in half in midair. This exploded as his blade made contact and Toshiro shielded himself from the blast. Mamoru was blown back by the blast as well, and crashed into the mirror of his dressing room.

Yukiko coughed through the smoke and fire, and fired off the rest of her round before collapsing from smoke inhalation.

"Yukiko!" Toshiro shouted in horror, and ran past the blaze, the hem of his gi catching on fire briefly but quickly fading as he stopped to kill the fire with a free hand. He then scooped up his wife and looked over his shoulder. Through the still-growing fire he could see Mamoru glaring through the flames to him. The magician then disappeared, and Toshiro ran down the hall, Yukiko still in his arms all the way into the exit.

Odori was with Jordan, Namiko strapped to her back as she battled what had been the bassist but had since turned into a raving warrior with a bass guitar and a desire to crack Jordan's skull.

A police cruiser screeched into the parking lot, fishtailing and then flying through a set of the doors, "There goes another cruiser!" Fuji muttered as she smashed out the remnants of the window and then drove through the main entrance to the stadium and finally onto the ground. "ODORI!" she called, and the samurai turned her attention, nearly falling victim to another one of the bassist's blows.

"Zenigata!" Odori shouted, blocking the bassist with her sword and its sheath as she looked over to Fuji, who was in full inspector Max Zenigata disguise. Dressing like Max had practically been a ticket for Fuji to drive recklessly; he was renowned for it, by this time.

Fuji glanced in the mirror sighed and tore off her mask, and then stuck her head out of the window, "No, it's me! Listen, I'm sorry! You were right! But now I need you! Leo's in trouble!" she shouted.

"Go on ahead, I've got this guy," Jordan called to Dori. "You need Namiko out of here, anyway!"

Odori gave a nod, and gave one kick to the bassist, sending him flying back as she took off into a run for the cruiser, jumped onto its hood, then climbed carefully through the window with Namiko still on her back. She unstrapped the little girl, and seated her in between Fuji and herself. Namiko was near tears with fear, clutching onto her mother's arm tightly.

"Don't worry, dear, it'll all be all right, soon," Odori whispered, seating her daughter into her lap and clutching onto her tightly. Fuji glanced to the two, and gently placed a hand a top Namiko's head.

"Your mom's right… Aunt Fuji will take care of everything she screwed up…. By the way, Dori-chan, that's a great look for you," Fuji said with a wink. "If you weren't with Jordan, well, I don't know what'd I do!"

"You disgust me on numerous levels," said Odori with a sneer.

Fuji drove to the streets at a continually hurried pace, and when they finally arrived at the mansion once again, there was an ambulance outside, awaiting them. Beside the ambulance was an anxious-looking Max, who paced back and forth worriedly and stopped wide-eyed as Fuji pulled up. He didn't care that the police car was in shambles, all that mattered was that Odori was here now. The samurai leapt out of the car, as if on cue, and unsheathed her sword, slicing through the glass encasing. It was moments after the glass cracked and fell to the ground that the shed caught on fire, much to the horror of all surrounding it.

"Oh, no…" Fuji gasped, and bolted from the car. "ARI!" she shouted, and before Max or Odori could stop her, she ran into the fiery shed, shaking her brother out of his unconscious state. Finding it impossible to revive him, she quickly cut his ropes with a pocket knife from one of her jacket pockets, and drug him out, collapsing to the ground with him atop of her as she managed to fight their way outside.

"Someone get them up!" Odori ran to Fuji as the ambulance pulled off Leo and went to work attempting to revive him, and Fuji, who awoke coughing soon felt a jacket draped over her shoulders. She looked upward to Max, who then scooped her up and set her inside the police cruise, despite the pain of his foot.

"You've got to trust me on this if you want to walk out of here alive…" Max said to Fuji quietly as he went to handcuff her.

Fuji stopped him midway, took the handcuff, and placed it over her own wrist, "This better not be a trick, Zenigata, you wouldn't like me when I'm angry."

"Eh, I suck at lying. Plus, what would I do if I didn't chase you?"

"I don't know, you and Leo are pretty bright… Maybe become like… Gay Colombos, or something…" Fuji said with a shrug, and Max only gave a chuckle.

"Gay Colombo? I'll have to run it past him…" Max attempted to start up the car, and much to his shock, even though the vehicle had suffered insurmountable damage, it was still able to run.

"Dori-chan, hop in!" Fuji called, and Odori nodded, climbing into the back seat where Namiko had taken cover.

"See, Nami? We won…" Odori embraced her daughter and then placed the little girl on her lap, and allowed Namiko to cling to her. "We always win in the end… You'll find that out more as the years go on."

"I dunno about that…" Fuji muttered, and this only fell within Max's hearing range. Zenigata gave her a look of confusion, and she only leaned her head against the remaining window of the car while Max drove on in what had now turned into a slow New York rain.

Later that night:

A solitary figure watched over Fuji as she quietly slept in her hotel room alone, having cleaned up for the night. He placed his hands in his pockets and sighed as he looked her over with a frown, knowing that this would be his last safe meeting with her.

"I hope I don't meet you again, Fuji…" Mamoru said in a whisper. "If we do, I don't want it to be as enemies… Take good care of everyone, including yourself…" he bent down and placed one hand at her side and kissed her gently upon the cheek, and then vanished, moments before there was a knock on the door and Fuji rose, drawing her bathrobe to a close and groggily answering the door for Yukiko, who was still in her sooty white suit.

"Leo's fine, he just inhaled too much smoke, and Zenigata's looking after him…. Ryo's…. Been better…." Yukiko muttered and looked downward to the ground. "We, urm… Were gonna fly with Victor to see her… We, wanted to know if you'd like to come…"

"Yukiko-san?" Fuji blinked as she watched Yukiko's shoulders begin to bob, and took her in for an embrace. "I'll come… Don't worry. We'll all go."

"She's my sister, is all…" Yukiko said, and wiped her face as she pulled away from Fuji and then glared at Lupin from beneath her fedora. "How… How could you do that? She… If it hadn't been for you screwing around, she wouldn't be in this mess! You just went too friggin' far this time, Fuji!"

"I… I know…." Fuji nodded. "What can I say? I'm sorry? I… I'm sorry for it. I should have listened to Jordan, to Dori, to everyone! What in the heck do you want, my blood? Feel free! Max is pissed at me, my best friend's in ICU and I actually loved a guy and he left me. So if that's what you want, go for it, Jigen."

"Fuji… I… I don't want that. I just want Ryo to be all right. That so much? I mean, that creep got your brother, too…. O-our flight leaves in a little bit, so you might wanna get packed."

"Mm, I'll be right there," Fuji nodded.

"Urm... Fuji? How're you holdin' up?" asked Yukiko worriedly after she was halfway back to her own room.

"Eh, we're hanging in there," Fuji gave a tired smile and shrugged. "I'll be all right. I've bounced back from a lot more. I'll probably just go home and watch some _Sailor Moon_ or _Cutey_ _Honey _or something fun and flashy like that… That's me, fun and flashy, right?"

"…You really liked this guy, eh?"

"Heh, yeah… I like to think of him as my Jordan, except, well, Jordan's never gone _that _crazy, yet…"

"We'll wait for it. With Dori, it's only a matter of time," Yukiko tipped her fedora to Fuji, and then Fuji Lupin shut the door, and breathed a heavy sigh, and then prepared for the flight.

The flight to Paris was a lengthy one, with Odori and Jordan dropping off Namiko with Saiyuri and the Zenigata-Lupin children at Lupin's estate, and then the entire group heading to the hospital.

Victor had been the first to arrive at the hospital, and seated himself by Ryo's beside with a sigh. He rubbed his eyes tiredly and looked upward at her, hooked up to numerous machines and IV's. Carmen had left moments before, and walked down to the main hall of the hospital to greet any others that would show up after him.

He said nothing, but rested his elbows upon the edge of her bed and glanced her over, and then finally broke the steady noise of the machine, "I should've been there for you when that creep attacked you, Ryoko… I should have been there… I… I'm so sorry…" he whispered, and took one of her hands in his.

"Urm… I… I brought flowers," Fuji peaked in the doorway, and then held up the vase she carried in her hands.

"And that makes everything so much better," Victor snapped as he looked over his shoulder to her icily. "I… Just leave, Fuji. You're not needed here. I think you've done enough—For everyone."

"I know I have…. What I did was worse than anything you've done," Fuji tilted her head downward and gave a sigh. "I just want to make sure she's all right."

"Well, you saw her, she's alive, but not much else. Now go, Lupin," Victor stood, but just as he went to lead Fuji out, he felt Ryo's hand squeeze his. He spun back around and looked to her, his eyes widened with shock, and then bent down to her. "R-Ryoko?"

"…What… What happened?" Ryo muttered, and looked to Victor, and then past him to Fuji. "Hey, they found you…"

"Yeah, they found me," Fuji muttered and looked toward the ground, not able to meet her injured friend's eyes. "I… Mamoru died… At least that's what Toshiro's said. I'm… Ryoko, I'm sorry."

"Nah, don't be," Ryo waved her off tiredly. "I'm used to you being a moron, anyway. It's what… Everyone loves about you, Fuji."

"Thanks," Fuji gave a small sad smile, and sighed. "I've got some more stops to make, but I just wanted to make sure that you were all right, Ryo-san. And I'm glad that I got to apologize to you, too."

"I'll be fine in no time, you little idiot," Ryo answered, and closed her eyes tiredly. "Right now, I'm just sleepy…."

"That's all right, rest. And Victor…"

"What do you want?" Victor asked with a frown.

"…Take good care of her, all right? Or I'll be on your ass like you were on mine," Fuji answered, and exited the hospital room.

New York:

"Lupin! Zenigata!" the chief of the ICPO stormed into Leo's recovery room, and immediately the nurse vacated and Max rose and saluted. "Put your hand down, Zenigata… Your flub's all over the news, but some how you two are still heroes in the eyes of the public…. How in the hell that is, I don't know. But you two made the paper."

"We know," Max held up his edition of the _Times_ tiredly, with the headline that read, 'Lupin Escapes Again, New York's Largest Stadium set Ablaze'.

"Well, apparently they were planning on leveling that damn stadium, anyway, so you saved the city a couple of million in demolition… You're both good at that," the chief said with a glare as Max set down the paper and Leo considered hiding beneath the sheets of his bed. "But at the office, I'm a laughing stock with the hirer-ups, yet again. This interview better go over well, or you'll both be out of a job, and you'll be doing Bar Mitzvahs 'til you're dead, Zenigata, and you'll be stuck doing voiceovers, and be known as a goddamn monkey for the rest of your days, Lupin! If you look me like an idiot… I swear to God…"

"….Shoot me if you love me," Leo muttered to Max quietly as the chief turned away from the two.

"Don't worry, I've got a plan," Max answered in a whisper, and patted his husband upon the hand.

"Your plans scare me," Leo murmured as he watched the crowd enter with their cameras and microphones.

They began with their barrage of questions, and Max lifted up his hands, and gave a confident smile, "Ladies and gentlemen, Inspector Lupin and I will gladly answer your questions one at a time."

"What are your plans now that Lupin the Fourth has escaped your grasp once again!"

"Is it true that you two are thinking about adopting again!"

"Where is Lupin the Fourth?"

"What comments do you have on the inexplicable disappearance of musician Mamoru Pikal?"

"Now, now…" Max smiled and clasped his hands together, "I want to reassure you that both Inspector Lupin and I have thought long and hard about our decision…"

"What decision?" Leo asked with a frown, and Max quickly placed a hand upon his husband's shoulder.

"And that he and I, after much contemplation, are quitting the ICPO."

And at that moment, on different parts of the world, Lupin the Third spilt his cup of scalding cup of hot coffee onto his lap and Koichi Zenigata fell from the ladder he had been climbing to rake the leaves from the roof. And then, for good measure, the ladder fell upon Zenigata, and this was followed by the radio which he had heard the news from. Lupin, meanwhile, gave a scream that convinced Fujiko he was being murdered in their kitchen.

"WE'RE WHAT!" Leo shrieked, and his heart monitor sounded off, causing the nurses to zoom back into his room.

"And we're going to open up our own detective agency," Max continued with a smile, getting into the concept of being in front of several dozen cameras. "And we won't exactly be able to capture Lupin as before, but we'll have the jurisdiction to return what she steals and perhaps even beat her to the punch!"

"WE AREN'T THE _GET BACKERS!_ THAT'S A DIFFERENT SHOW, YOU IDIOT!" Leo cried and gripped onto Max's jacket and shook him violently while one of the nurses prepared a sedative for Lupin. "I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"

The needle then fell into Leo's arm, and his shaking slowed, and then came to a stop, and he fell back onto his bed, snoring soundly.

There was dead silence, which Max broke after a few moments of staring downward at the now-resting Leo, "…..It's the drugs, they're making him delusional… Any _other_ questions while we're here?"

Paris:

"Pop almost kicked Dad's ass," Jared said as he, Dako and Avery sat watching the news report in rerun.

Lupin quickly circled about the couch and switched off the television, and the two oldest children gave a moan, "You guys have watched it twice today, already. Enough. Go outside and tie up some frogs to fireworks or… Whatever it is you guys do…"

"I'm gonna do some ninja training!" Jared announced and hopped off the couch.

"You're not a ninja!" Dako called as she also stood from the couch and walked upstairs. "I'm going to go play with that safe, see if I can't pick it…"

Lupin watched the two children go off their separate ways, and then sighed as he looked down to Avery, who held out his arms for his grandfather to pick him up.

'OK,' said Lupin in a quick sign, and then lifted up the small boy into his arms. "It's only a matter of time until you're just as hyper as them…."

"Lupin, Jared's caught in another tree!" Fujiko called from the kitchen.

Lupin gave a sigh, and rubbed his forehead, "All right, I'll be right there…. Just…. Get me the ladder, Fujicakes…"

He was nearly to the kitchen when he heard a knock upon the door, and then turned and walked over to the front, Avery upon his shoulders. He was understandably surprised when he saw Fuji at the door, and she gave him a small smile, embracing him silently.

"Hey… I… Urm, well, see Ari on the news?" Lupin inquired, resting a hand on her back.

"Who hasn't?" Fuji laughed and broke out of her father's hold, and smiled, "Good to see you again, Dad. Nice to see someone who doesn't look like they want my head on a platter, for a change."

"It's all right, if they're anything like their parents, they'll forgive you, too," Lupin sighed and shrugged. "You're a Lupin, you're bound to make screw ups… And more often than not they're gonna deal with relationships."

"Thanks for the pep-talk. I have a favor to ask you," Fuji removed a video tape along with a handful of envelopes and set them in Lupin's free hand. "I'm throwing a party on the 25th, and I need it here."

"Well, couldn't you do it then?"

"No, I need you to," sighed Fuji, looking back to her car. "I'm gonna be late to it. Just… Do it for me, all right, Daddy? And… Let Mom know that I love her."

"You're disappearing once again, aren't you?" Lupin said with a frown.

"….I love you," Fuji kissed him on the cheek and turned away, and climbed into her car once again.

Several days later:

"I hate wearing suits…" Jordan tugged upon his tie and sighed as he glanced to Odori, whose formal kimono watched her blue and purple streaked hair.

"Mm… Well, Fuji said that this was a formal affair," Odori answered as she glanced to the invitation and then back upward to the Lupin mansion, where the cars were already lined. Presently, Leo lifted Avery out of his baby seat while Max hobbled toward the front door, invitation in hand.

"So you guys, too, neh? Guess she thought of everyone," Jordan said as he climbed out of his car followed by Odori with Namiko.

"Yup…" Leo watched as Ryo zoomed up, Victor cowering in fear of her speed in the seat beside her.

Jordan walked into the home with his girlfriend at one side and his brother at the other, and into the large living room, where tables had been set up with food and a large punch bowl.

"This stuff's great… Grandpa must've spiked it," Dako said as she took a sip of the punch. "Want some, Jared?"

"Erm… Yeah," Jared nodded. "You look really great tonight, Dako…"

"….Thanks?" Dako sipped her punch once more and raised an eyebrow. "You look… Well, your hair doesn't look like crap, for once."

"Wow, thanks!" Jared smiled brightly. "Hey, want me to show you this move I picked up, later?"

"Not in the least," Dako answered quickly, disappearing into the crowd to look for her parents.

"Okay, okay…" Lupin walked into the living room as Victor stumbled in beside Ryo, videotape in hand. "Fuji said she was going to be a little late, but she wanted me to play this once everyone was here."

Everyone seated themselves in front of the large television, and Lupin put in the video tape and watched from a distance.

After a pause from the tape, Fuji appeared on the screen in front of a nondescript white wall, a sad smile on her face, "Hey, guys… Guess you're all there, huh?"

"You think?" Yukiko muttered. Ryo rolled her eyes and nudged her sister form her place upon the couch.

"Well, I…." Fuji gave a sigh as she continued, "I'm so glad I've been able to work with all of you guys over the years… Ryo-san, you always kept me grounded and… Well, you were the best friend I could ask for. Leo, Max… You guys, you…. I know we always didn't get along, but you guys were always there for me, and I'll never forget it, and you all have some awesome kids. I… I'm not good with having my own, but they always made me feel like a parent. Complete with the stress! Oi… Yukiko-san, you were one of the best damn bodyguards I could ever have, and you were always there with an honest opinion… Sometimes it was too honest, but, hey, it was a nice change, sometimes. It's good to have someone around you who lets you know you're not God."

"What in the hell's she babbling about?" Odori wondered in a whisper.

"Ally… You were one of my best guy friends over the years, and you've got a great girl. Make sure you stay with Carmen, heh, she can really throw a punch. Dori-chan, I know we were usually… Always… At odds, but you took the hazing, and you never kill me. Eh, thanks for that. Jordan, you better take care of her! Although I'm pretty sure she takes care of you," she added with a wink.

"….I always thought she'd be the one on top," Victor muttered. "Short enough… I'll bet she has to be on a stool when she's kneeling…"

Jordan went to attack Victor, but Odori quickly grabbed onto his arm and shook her head.

"…Toshiro-chan, thanks to you I know more showtunes than I think I even want to know, and, hey, you're about the only non-relative guy I know who I haven't screwed. That's a distinction in itself. Victor… You're a complete and utter jerk, but you've saved our asses when need be. And… Heiji…. I… I love you. I'm just sorry I didn't tell you sooner. Guess I'm good at saying stuff only when I shouldn't, eh? I mean it… I really… I just wish things could've worked out better. I love all of you guys, so much. I just… I'm not good at showing it. Well, until next time! It's been fun, guys!" she waved and the screen blinked off, turning a static gray and the blue.

"…She's gone?" Dako blinked and sniffed. "But… She…"

"Come here, sweetie," Leo kneeled onto the ground and took her in his arms. "She's just… You know how she is, right? She just had a lot going on in her life…"

"When did she drop off that video?" Max rose from his seat and turned about to Lupin.

"…About two weeks ago. She could be anywhere," Lupin sighed and scratched the back of his head. "Being Fuji, she'll be back…"

"But what if she doesn't, Dad?" Leo looked over to his father with a glare. "Think about the last time we left her to go on her own!"

"She isn't a kid, Ari! She can make her own decisions, unfortunately. She just needs some time to cool down, is all. I'm sure she'll be fine!"

"Dad, I thought she would be, and it almost got her killed…"

"It's… It's a risk we have to take," Lupin answered, placing his hands in his pockets.

"You know what, the Lupin the Third I knew would've been there two weeks ago, barring her from leaving," Leo rose and walked out to the back porch, nearly running down Heiji, who had also stood and now stared at the screen with disbelief.

"She… She left again?" Heiji gulped dryly. "Guess there's one thing left for me to do, then…"

"If it's jump off a bridge, I tried that…" Ryo said plainly.

"No… I'm just going to have to go find her," Heiji said with strong determination in his voice.

"What if she doesn't wanna be found?" Yukiko leaned forward and looked upward to Heiji. "Lupins… They're sneaky bastards. If she doesn't want us to find her, we won't. It's as simple as that, man."

"You and Toshiro have a family, so you guys shouldn't worry about it, anyway," Heiji brushed his hair back.

"Nah, I'm your brother, I should go with you," Toshiro said, standing.

"What! And leave me alone with the baby!" Yukiko yelped.

"Listen… Guys…" Ryo held out her hands and sighed. "I'm unofficially second in command here, and I say that we just let this sink in. She's got to have a reason for this. If we wait one night, she won't be any further away from us tonight as she was last week."

"…" Heiji turned away from Ryo and stormed off, headed toward his car.

"And I thought my wedding party was awkward," Max muttered as he now sat on the ground with his children surrounding him.

Leo, meanwhile, stood on the porch, a cigarette hanging from his mouth as he leaned on the railing surrounding the back of the house. He looked around with half-opened, tired eyes, and suddenly became away of a noise, and drew his gun.

Fuji chuckled and stepped out of a shrub, and hopped over the railing and approached Leo, while remaining in the shadow, "Down, Matlock. I'm only here to drop off some things."

"What in the hell are you doing? What's that all about in there, some kind of sick joke!" Leo hissed and stomped over to her.

Fuji smirked and removed the cigarette from his mouth, and smashed it with her heel, "That's a terrible habit, you know that? And it couldn't look any more awkward if you were an iguana with a cigarette in its mouth. Does Zenigata know that you smoke?"

"It doesn't matter! Does anyone know you're here?"

"Touché…" Fuji sighed, and looked to the floor, "I just want to let you know that I don't want anyone going after me. I heard them in there, and…. I just need some time to clear my head, Ari. Please? I just need some time to myself. You understand that, I'd think."

"…Don't play that card, you know that's a low one to play…"

"I know, and that's why I use it," Fuji sighed and shrugged. "I… I'll be all right, Ari. I promise that I'll keep out of trouble… I'm actually…. I'm actually doing this to help stay out of trouble."

"You better not be running off for good."

"Who, me?" Fuji smiled and tilted her head to a side. "Even if I tried, you guys would find me. Just… Gimme a year, that's all I'm asking."

"What if the gang doesn't want to get back together after a year?"

"Risk I'm just gonna have to take, then, huh?"

"Hey, Lupin," Leo gave a small smirk.

"Huh?"

Leo removed a handcuff from his jacket pocket and slapped it over Fuji's wrist, "You're under arrest."

"You've got me, Inspector," Fuji said with a light chuckle. "Or do I mean detective?"

"We'll still be on you ass Fuji, as soon as you show up again, I'll be waiting there for you."

"You know what? I can't wait," Fuji smiled and pulled out of the set of handcuffs, and tossed it back to Leo. "Until next time," she embraced him tightly, and Leo returned this, and she hopped off of the porch.

"OH! LEO!"

"What now?" Leo asked, walking over to the opposite side of the porch and leaning upon it.

"There's a little special something in your pocket now… I think you'll find the address, too…"

"Address? Fuji, what are you—" but she had already vanished, and Leo dug into his pocket, and pulled out a key, with a Parisian address attached on a slip of paper. "She didn't…."

He was left there upon the porch, the key still in his hand and a warm summer breeze blowing past him as he looked out at the darkness over the lake.

The following week, a Paris office building:

"So… This is our new office, huh?" Max set down his box of books, heavy with Leo's foreign language reference guides. "How many more?"

"Only five more, hon," Leo answered, setting down a box of diplomas.

"FIVE? You're killing me…." Max muttered, and rubbed his lower back and bent down to adjust the Velcro that covered his walking cast.

"Oh, got to go," Leo smiled and glanced to his watch. "I've got to drop off some people at the airport."

"What? Oh, come on, Leo!" Max moaned and slapped his forehead. "You're gonna make me carry up those boxes on my own? Up all five flights of stairs?"

"…I'll make it up to you later, I promise…"

"Oh, really, now?"

"Don't be a perv," Leo said coolly, "I'll be home later." He grabbed his jacket from the doorknob, and looked over his shoulder once more to Max before scaling down the stairs and to his car.

"Ain't this how it ended last time?" Yukiko asked as she watched Leo Lupin exit his new office into his old beaten car.

"Well, we've gained one more since last time," Toshiro glanced to the stroller that held Saiyuri, who was now asleep as they walked down the street. "And… Maybe another one soon enough?"

"We'll see," Yukiko answered quickly. "Just… I don't wanna give up on a good thing yet. I'm not ready to be a full-time mommy… You're the more maternal one out of the two of us, if anything."

"Yeah… I know…" Toshiro muttered and glanced downward to the small child. '_Makes me wonder…'_

"Hey, you okay, buddy?" Yukiko slapped him upon the back and smiled, and Toshiro gave a small nod, and the two turned another corner with Saiyuri now joining them for the ride. "Come on, I'll buy you both a drink…"

"How very 'Jigen' of you," Toshiro said with a chuckle.

Well, look for another part soon enough, guys!

See you soon,

Lucy


End file.
